• 3 months ago
Transcript
00:00Ah, it's time to go, whoever Shane is.
00:13Hit, hit, hit attack.
00:19I'm looking at these dumbass combo moves.
00:27Okay.
00:28Sure.
00:29Okay.
00:30Okay.
00:31Oh no, this is the one we can go to the dojo and skip.
00:39Oh yeah, you're right.
00:40Oh.
00:41Do you want to restart then?
00:42Yep.
00:43Oh, it's over.
00:44Thank God.
00:45Alright guys, let's do it.
00:46Oh, it's over.
00:47Thank God.
00:48Alright guys, let's do it.
00:49Oh, it's over.
00:50Thank God.
00:51Alright guys, let's do it.
00:56God, all the kerning and all the ways, it was fuckin' awful.
01:16Alright, oh, there's dudes, yeah, here they are, getting rekt.
01:24There he was.
01:25Alright, it's tough doing whatever that is, it slows stuff down.
01:38I don't know, it kills them pretty quick.
01:43Wait a minute, they fixed their game and now it's just not spawning links, what's happening
01:48here?
01:49I missed all the bricks.
01:50This is bullshit.
01:51This is what I wanted them to keep, but it's okay.
02:18Alright guys, Steve's sitting on the floor, pretending to be a flying pig.
02:46Cool.
03:17What the fuck?
03:22God, I'm melting.
03:34Why is Sheriff just spinning?
03:36Why is his name Sheriff?
03:38God, actually.
03:42You don't talk to the Sheriff like that.
03:47And get closer to your mic.
03:49He's dressing off as casual, I feel like that's impressive.
03:52Yeah, I guess that's a fair statement, I haven't seen a badge yet from him.
03:57Having the name Sheriff doesn't entitle you to...
04:00Oh yeah, I just saw you guys.
04:02What is even happening out there?
04:04What happened to you?
04:08No, it's the same fucking...
04:10It's the same fucking...
04:18Alright, I'm sorry.
04:20What?
04:22This fucking...
04:23They changed my sound options or something.
04:26What the hell?
04:31Oh, sweet baby Jesus.
04:33There's a guy.
04:40Not strangely empty though.
04:42That's amazing, there's like...
04:44Yeah, you just hit the button.
04:47Show titles? No, I don't give a shit.
04:52Frequency? What the fuck?
05:00Alright.
05:04I don't wanna be Sheriff, no.
05:07Can you hit it too quick?
05:11He's pudgy.
05:14He's slow.
05:15He's a pudgy guy, almost casual.
05:19Hey man.
05:20Don't talk about it, he's not that pudgy, please.
05:23He's like ready to fight, dude.
05:25Look at him.
05:26He's got office worker rage.
05:28He's like, if I was a fucking video game character, I'd commiserate with this dude.
05:34He's really hot.
05:40No, not at all.
05:48I don't know who the fuck Will Cooper is.
05:50Please ignore that.
05:51Don't fuck Will Cooper.
05:52Don't ignore all that.
05:53Other than who the fuck Will Cooper is at all.
06:01Oh.
06:03Wait, I'll figure it out real quick.
06:05Yeah.
06:09I'm just gonna do a quick restart.
06:11Don't use real names.
06:19At least...
06:21Fine, he gets the good Sheriff.
06:24Sucks for whoever.
06:26I'm the man killer known as Rick.
06:30I'm the only one in sensible pants.
06:32That's what he does as a girl.
06:38You're the only one in sensible pants?
06:40Look at Rick's camo kick-ass kickers.
06:44Rick's the only one who's come equipped.
06:47He's a...
06:48Dude.
06:51Because I recently watched all of Andrew Tate's videos and he says I need to be prepared for combat in the city.
06:58Oh man, look.
06:59Look.
07:00Look at this dude.
07:03This hasn't happened to us before.
07:07I had to beat up his car and he came in here and kicked my ass.
07:13Also, anybody who's listening, we are not Andrew Tate people.
07:19We live in the cities.
07:24Andrew Tate is not on our side.
07:28Okay, alright.
07:33Yeah, he is on our side, you're right.
07:36Oh, he just shot the shit out of him.
07:39Alright, well.
07:55Oh, they put him down.
08:03I don't know, I just do a little bit of damage and then I let this dude finish him off.
08:10I'll also take that axe.
08:13Alright, killer, you ready to move on to the next area?
08:16He is.
08:19I just chopped that dude in half.
08:27There's another axe if someone wants it.
08:33Oh my god.
08:40Damn, this thing.
08:42Let's keep moving.
09:03Slap you in the corner with an ass kick.
09:18Oh, they must have got Buddy.
09:21He's the only one who left his gun.
09:23Oh no.
09:32Take that.
09:58Oh yeah.
10:03I'm going to have to request in the forums if they give us the option to change the cursor colors on these.
10:14Because they should really be red or blue, you know?
10:24One red, one yellow, one blue.
10:32Thank you.
10:37Thank you.
10:47We're getting the hang of it.
10:52Don't shoot!
10:54Hey man, he said don't shoot.
10:59Shame this was me.
11:02Freeze him.
11:32That was better than last time, I guess.
12:02Why is this always a problem every single game?
12:04Where you can run forward off of him and there are enemies on the side and you get hit.
12:08Every single game.
12:11No one's figuring that problem out yet.
12:15I don't know.
12:16I don't expect that all three of us have to run to the side.
12:21You can't see what's happening.
12:27Oh, he got crunched.
12:33Oh no.
12:39Wait, what are we fighting?
12:40We're fighting the arrow.
12:48We can fire away at each other.
12:51This is...
13:01Ooh.
13:04Man, I really love missing my attack.
13:06Because then you have to zoom in on me.
13:15He's still alive.
13:16There we go.
13:22Ooh.
13:30Oh.
13:35Yeah.
13:40Yeah.
13:43Ah.
13:47Yeah.
13:52Yeah.
14:05I don't know what your commitment is to being a gangster, but I feel like I have room for the train.
14:16I feel like I pay more attention to the train than any guy trying to punch me.
14:20This is deep.
14:43Crunch.
14:50I just love how many ways the dudes can die.
14:56Nice.
15:12Nice.
15:19Ooh.
15:25Oh, wait, dude.
15:26Oh, he's back.
15:27Oh, okay.
15:29Can we make it not die like we flipped the other guy?
15:33You know we can't.
15:34This is gonna do whatever it wants.
15:36Look at it.
15:43Get off that thing.
15:49What?
16:20Damn, there's cash in these things the whole time?
16:26I would hit it for the punch if I didn't know there was gonna be cash.
16:50Oh.
16:55Oh.
17:01Oh, I see.
17:06You leave that racially ambiguous woman alone.
17:11Let's get the dude out here.
17:14You leave that child alone.
17:15You can take Dr. Strife.
17:20Oh, just to free him?
17:21Yeah.
17:45I mean, I guess a flying punch to the balls would hurt.
17:48Yeah.
18:00Yeah, I'm definitely down after that.
18:05Whoa.
18:17Whoa.
18:33Oh, they're jumping me.
18:34They're jumping me.
18:35Ah.
18:38Shame down.
18:41Crunch.
18:43Sheriff's taking care of business.
18:47Oh, I'm about to fall.
18:49Alright, prisoner 50.
19:08What's the point of the cool Shane spin kick if it knocks everybody away with the first fist of water?
19:14Oh, bring it on.
19:15Oh, bring it on.
19:16Now's the time, Sanchez.
19:18We see if the bug's been fixed.
19:21Ah, he's blowing our asses.
19:34Sheriff's gonna get in there with those arm spins.
19:45Oh, boy.
19:53Shame down.
20:10Don't run away, Sanchez.
20:11You clut and coward.
20:15Son of a bitch.
20:28Like, he ran around, raised his hands, was wearing a union suit.
20:34What more do you need to spare a man?
20:45I appreciate it.
20:46Actually, this is fun.
20:49I appreciate your effort.
20:54Wow, they just got demolished.
20:56Oh, no.
20:57Sheriff's in between now.
20:58What have I done?
20:59I corrupted the Sheriff.
21:03Like, I was shuffling along the edge, and I was like, well, I can't...
21:07Is that move fast enough for the Sheriff?
21:11I think there's another one.
21:16No, please.
21:17Please don't kill me.
21:19Stop shuffling like a moron.
21:20Go home, man.
21:22Look, he's...
21:23Wait, he dropped food.
21:24Wait.
21:25You have a crate of money.
21:29He dropped me a hamburger.
21:30I apologize.
21:32Although, if he's a time loss, he's gonna regret it.
21:37Excuse me.
21:39The sudden shift in character.
21:41I see.
21:46I gotta wait for you.
21:48You're a hindrance.
21:49I'm gonna blow you away.
21:52Am I the only one not using a joystick on this?
21:55Because it sucks as fuck.
21:57I'm using the keyboard.
22:12That's where all the armor is, man.
22:16This is why nobody would ever kill Clefable.
22:28Yo, they came out with the AK-47s and just took three men in t-shirts out.
22:36It's Kurtz.
22:42God, this guy has a fucking secret agent or something.
22:44My God.
22:49Where'd you go?
23:00Why is he gaining health?
23:01Is he some kind of coked-up man?
23:03Get mad, man.
23:04What's happening?
23:10I'll get you, Sanchez.
23:14I don't know why, but I'm gonna get you.
23:19We could've watched the intro.
23:22That's not what a speedrun is.
23:25Excuse me.
23:26Hold on a minute.
23:27Hey, whoever- No.
23:28Whoever hit start, continue.
23:30That wasn't me.
23:31Oh, it was me. Sorry.
23:32I was dead.
23:35How am I supposed to defend against that guy?
23:37Just machine gunning us to death and taking your life?
23:41Oh, I guess to shoot him fast enough. Okay.
23:45Right here.
23:48Okay, Sanchez.
23:51Listen, listen. I'm gonna make you regret it, bro.
23:53Come here.
23:57Y'all, ask the developer what he thinks he might be able to do.
24:03What am I supposed to do?
24:05Is this the block button right here?
24:10Well, there we go. Question answered.
24:15Oh.
24:21I'm trying to block. This is too late, man.
24:26Gotta block for the team.
24:28I can block for myself.
24:29Ah, sucker.
24:41Hold on. I think after we hit him a couple-
24:44A numbered amount of times with the block-
24:46Ah, man! Never mind.
25:07Whew, finally.
25:11Well.
25:14Ah.
25:44Jesus Christ.
26:04Jesus Christ.
26:06He definitely is good enough to kill me in real life.
26:15Ah.
26:20I'm gonna send you all back to prison.
26:34He's almost there, guys.
26:44Alright, take that, Sanchez!
26:46Oh, wait, wait. I don't believe it.
26:48Did he die offscreen?
26:50He ran offscreen.
27:14You leave that OSHA employee alone.
27:45Oh.
27:47Yeah, I was right.
27:48Can we run away?
27:56Can we shoot him?
27:57Oh, no. You got another bug to avoid.
27:59Let's take a screenshot of this.
28:01This is just a victory here.
28:03Oh, dear.
28:04Oh, oh, oh!
28:05Somebody's getting hitsent on him.
28:07We're back in the game, baby!
28:11Okay.
28:12Up, up, go up.
28:14Nice.
28:16Oh, no, this seems like a dumb optional thing.
28:18Ah, crap.
28:24Get out of the way, lady.
28:26Alright, I'm trying to get the healing.
28:31Thanks so much.
28:37Thank you.
28:38Thanks so much.
28:39Thank you, thank you.
28:45Is that you shooting him in the dick, Chair?
28:48No, that was me.
29:15Oh, no.
29:16Oh, no.
29:17Oh, no.
29:18Oh, no.
29:19Oh, no.
29:20Oh, no.
29:21Oh, no.
29:22Oh, no.
29:23Oh, no.
29:24Oh, no.
29:25Oh, no.
29:26Oh, no.
29:27Oh, no.
29:28Oh, no.
29:29Oh, no.
29:30Oh, no.
29:31Oh, no.
29:32Oh, no.
29:33Oh, no.
29:34Oh, no.
29:35Oh, no.
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29:38Oh, no.
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29:40Oh, no.
29:41Oh, no.
29:42Oh, no.
29:43Oh, no.
29:44Oh, no.
29:45Oh, no.
29:46Oh, no.
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29:51Oh, no.
29:52Oh, no.
29:53Oh, no.
29:54Oh, no.
29:55Oh, no.
29:56Oh, no.
29:57Oh, no.
29:58Oh, no.
29:59Oh, no.
30:00Oh, no.
30:01Oh, no.
30:02Oh, no.
30:03Oh, no.
30:04Oh, no.
30:05Oh, no.
30:06Oh, no.
30:07Oh, no.
30:08Oh, no.
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30:10Oh, no.
30:11Oh, no.
30:12Oh, no.
30:13Oh, no.
30:14Oh, no.
30:15Oh, no.
30:16Oh, no.
30:17Oh, no.
30:18Oh, no.
30:19Oh, no.
30:20Oh, no.
30:21Oh, no.
30:22Oh, no.
30:23Oh, no.
30:24Oh, no.
30:25Oh, no.
30:26Oh, no.
30:27Oh, no.
30:28Oh, no.
30:29Oh, no.
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30:31Oh, no.
30:32Oh, no.
30:33Oh, no.
30:34Oh, no.
30:35Oh, no.
30:36Oh, no.
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30:38Oh, no.
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30:40Oh, no.
30:41Oh, no.
30:42Oh, no.
30:43Oh, no.
30:44Oh, no.
30:45Oh, no.
30:46Oh, no.
30:47Oh, no.
30:48Oh, no.
30:49Oh, no.
30:50Oh, no.
30:51Oh, no.
30:52Oh, no.
30:53Oh, no.
30:54Oh, no.
30:55Oh, no.
30:56Oh, no.
30:57Oh, no.
30:58Oh, no.
30:59Oh, no.
31:00Oh, no.
31:01Oh, no.
31:02Oh, no.
31:03Oh, no.
31:04Oh, no.
31:05Oh, no.
31:06Oh, no.
31:07Oh, no.
31:08Oh, no.
31:09Oh, no.
31:10Oh, no.
31:11Oh, no.
31:12Oh, no.
31:13Oh, no.
31:14Oh, no.
31:15Oh, no.
31:16Oh, no.
31:17Oh, no.
31:18Oh, no.
31:19Oh, no.
31:20Oh, no.
31:21Oh, no.
31:22Oh, no.
31:23Oh, no.
31:24Oh, no.
31:25Oh, no.
31:26Oh, no.
31:27Oh, no.
31:28Oh, no.
31:29Oh, no.
31:30Oh, no.
31:31Oh, no.
31:32Oh, no.
31:33Oh, no.
31:34Oh, no.
31:35Oh, no.
31:36Oh, no.
31:37Oh, no.
31:38Oh, no.
31:40Uh-oh.
31:42Are we able to get away?
32:09Alright, advance!
32:25All right, advance!
32:41That's fun, that's what that is.
32:43Hell yeah. I like Shane's got a cool unique animation, like one-handed shooting.
32:59I think it wouldn't break his wrist, but hey, whatever.
33:03You could just watch him punch a column in a train station at best.
33:13That's fair.
33:15Stomp them. Wow, bad day to be one of these dudes.
33:35Oh, and they're kickable. That's a classy touch.
33:45Getting to the fire now.
33:56Bulletproof vest, isn't it bulletproof against knives?
34:35Crazy.
35:05Get his gun, get his gun.
36:05Don't go into the generator lady, no!
36:35Come on, forget it.
37:05Oops.
37:35Was one of the dudes there just slugging it off?
38:02I think he's pointing at you to spawn more guys.
38:16All right, time to juggle this shit until we're done.
38:23Good juggle shit, Des.
38:26Oh no, he's got the hammer.
38:39Oh no, our greatest fear.
38:47He's immune to it, he doesn't care.
38:56Or does he?
39:06You wanna be Janet?
39:08No, what the fuck?
39:10Well, let me be anything else.
39:11Okay, well, sorry Janet.
39:14I guess I'm Janet now.
39:25Oh, okay, cool.
39:26I was shooting the whole time and you came by and slugged me.
39:29You gotta shoot the base.
39:31I shoot this son of a bitch.
39:38All right, they're officially a time loss.
39:40It's open season on them bastards.
40:00No, fuck no.
40:29So I kind of would have liked to see the touch, whatever it was.
40:39I can't allow it, not in a speed run.
40:58I'm sorry, her main move is a ball level stab.
41:01Like, yeah, all right, the ball.
41:05That's an effective move.
41:34I just went right into it, lucky for us.
42:33I'm sorry, what kind of jumping shag is this?
42:43Chair's tactical jump.
42:48Not you, I am.
42:50Same thing.
42:55She knows the knife is the primary asset and gotta work with it.
43:54Oh, okay.
44:14Oh, okay.
44:33Oh, okay.
45:02Oh, okay.
45:31Oh, okay.
45:32Oh, okay.
45:33Oh, okay.
45:34Oh, okay.
45:35Oh, okay.
45:36Oh, okay.
45:37Oh, okay.
45:38Oh, okay.
45:39Oh, okay.
45:40Oh, okay.
45:41Oh, okay.
45:42Oh, okay.
45:43Oh, okay.
45:44Oh, okay.
45:45Oh, okay.
45:46Oh, okay.
45:47Oh, okay.
45:48Oh, okay.
45:49Oh, okay.
45:50Oh, okay.
45:51Oh, okay.
45:52Oh, okay.
45:53Oh, okay.
45:54Oh, okay.
45:55Oh, okay.
45:56Oh, okay.
45:57Oh, okay.
45:58Oh, okay.
45:59Oh, okay.
46:00Oh, okay.
46:01Oh, okay.
46:02Oh, okay.
46:03Oh, okay.
46:04Oh, okay.
46:05Oh, okay.
46:06Oh, okay.
46:07Oh, okay.
46:08Oh, okay.
46:09Oh, okay.
46:10Oh, okay.
46:11Oh, okay.
46:12Oh, okay.
46:13Oh, okay.
46:14Oh, okay.
46:15Oh, okay.
46:16Oh, okay.
46:17Oh, okay.
46:18Oh, okay.
46:19Oh, okay.
46:20Oh, okay.
46:21Oh, okay.
46:22Oh, okay.
46:23Oh, okay.
46:24Oh, okay.
46:25Oh, okay.
46:26Oh, okay.
46:27Oh, okay.
46:28Oh, okay.
46:29Oh, okay.
46:30Oh, okay.
46:31Oh, okay.
46:32Oh, okay.
46:33Oh, okay.
46:34Oh, okay.
46:35Oh, okay.
46:36Oh, okay.
46:37Oh, okay.
46:38Oh, okay.
46:39Oh, okay.
46:40Oh, okay.
46:41Oh, okay.
46:42Oh, okay.
46:43Oh, okay.
46:44Oh, okay.
46:45Oh, okay.
46:46Oh, okay.
46:47Oh, okay.
46:48Oh, okay.
46:49Oh, okay.
46:50Oh, okay.
46:51Oh, okay.
46:52Oh, okay.
46:53Oh, okay.
46:54Oh, okay.
46:55Oh, okay.
46:56Oh, okay.
46:57Oh, okay.
46:58Oh, okay.
46:59Oh, okay.
47:00Oh, okay.
47:01Oh, okay.
47:12I completely forgot.
47:13I totally forgot.
47:14And true origins of the payday crew.
47:15He took us all to town.
47:23Oh no, I killed her.
47:53Oh no, I killed her.
48:23Oh no, I killed her.
48:53Oh no, I killed her.
49:23Oh no, I killed her.
49:38Shane?
49:39Shane?
49:40Shane!
49:41Noooo!
49:42What the fuck happened?
49:43Did you betray us?
49:44Betrayed us.
49:45This is a spam that seems to work now.
50:03After all this time Shane, after all this time, what did Sanjayz tell you?
50:13He had to write the whole review about what the story is.
50:43You're fucking juggling, loser.
50:45That's what you get for leaving the group.
50:47Yeah.
50:48Ugh.
50:49Nice.
50:50Nice!
50:51Good juggle.
50:52That's definitely the way to do it.
50:56Why is that?
50:59Come on, Janet.
51:00You need to report the bug that there's a Janet on the player's screen.
51:05Report the bug of a time loss.
51:08Oh my god, who are we losing to?
51:12Who knows?
51:13We lose by five seconds, I don't know who to blame.
51:18Janet and her bug.
51:24Damn Janet.
51:29That dude's not a friendly.
51:36Janet's going hard.
51:39There's a chance she's going to get hit.
51:42There's a chance she's going to get hit.
51:45I mean, what if we're the bad guys?
51:52That's not possible.
51:55That doesn't matter, Jack.
51:57Uh, wait, wait, wait.
51:59Maybe we are the bad guys.
52:03We're getting United States military clearance for pirate heads today.
52:09That would be weird.
52:32Oh my god.
53:03Oh.
53:06I didn't even have a gun in his hand.
53:29He just walked out with his hands up.
53:36That's how long she begs for mercy to get it.
53:40Mercy is never granted.
53:53Right?
53:58More things change, more things stay the same.
54:23That guy just jumped off.
54:27Sir, if you're coming back from being chumped, you know what to do.
54:52Why can't I hit this guy?
55:12Let's get in there and beat the shit out of him.
55:15Sorry.
55:16It's fine.
55:45God bless you.
56:16Take that, you bastard.
56:31Nice.
56:32Four billion dollars in American taxpayer money down the fucking toilet.
56:36And then the sheriff eats a hamburger off the ground.
56:39Oh, yeah.
56:41I love the face of napalm in the morning.
57:12Had to run into the claymore, did you?
57:39I mean, I don't mean to brag, but you could literally hear the impact of his balls on my fist.
57:55Okay.
57:57All right.
58:05Oh, yeah.
58:07You beat them all.
58:08Congratulations.
58:09I'm going home.
58:11That was tough.
58:12Heroes enjoy a moment of peace.
58:14Damn right.
58:17But it's not long until the new threat surfaces.
58:21I tried to make it too real.
58:24Zombies.
58:35All right.
58:36Let's go to that Patreon.
58:37Let's help that dude out for his awesome work.
58:41I appreciate Andrew Thatcher's work on this.
58:44Honestly, cool dude.
58:46Cool game.
58:48It was fun.
58:51Yeah, responsive in the Steam forums.
58:53Everything got fixed.
58:54A few little things to fix, but that's all right.
58:57Oh, yeah.
58:58Right at the top.
58:59Screw you, Sanchez.
59:00Listen.
59:01He ain't laughing anymore.
59:03Yeah, that's right.
59:05All right.
59:06Well, he's right.
59:12The prequel.
59:13The aftermath.
59:17All right, hold on a sec.