• 3 months ago

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00:00Is your daddy a silly daddy?
00:00:05Is your daddy a silly daddy?
00:00:07Someone's come to visit you.
00:00:09Do you want to come and see your Uncle Alex?
00:00:14Yay! Where is he?
00:00:16Where is he?
00:00:17We've got a visitor.
00:00:19We've got a visitor.
00:00:20Did you see that Alex? He smiled at you.
00:00:23Yes, he did.
00:00:25Do you like your Uncle Alex?
00:00:27He'll be babysitting before you know it.
00:00:30Henry, I was thinking we might have a few quiets this weekend.
00:00:34Celebrate the upcoming nuptials and your arrival.
00:00:38Yeah, I'd love to.
00:00:40But I can't.
00:00:42All our money's going on the wedding, mate.
00:00:44You understand.
00:00:46Why don't you hold him for a minute?
00:00:48No, I don't think that's a good idea.
00:00:50You'll be fine.
00:00:51No, I just don't want to drop him on his head or something.
00:00:54Don't be silly. It's a baby. They don't bite, alright?
00:00:56And I don't know how to hold the...
00:00:59Take the baby.
00:01:00No, this is...
00:01:02Listen dramatically.
00:01:03Who's got you?
00:01:12Isn't he the most adorable thing in the whole world?
00:01:28You've been working overtime
00:01:31In the galley
00:01:34Keeping your blood moving
00:01:37You've been working overtime
00:01:40In the galley
00:01:43Keeping your blood moving
00:01:46You've been working overtime
00:01:49In the galley
00:01:52Keeping your blood moving
00:01:55Moving
00:02:00And I'm towing
00:02:02The party line
00:02:05From my airplane
00:02:08Somewhere over here
00:02:15What you plan on doing tonight, my friend?
00:02:21I'm thinking
00:02:24Of killing someone
00:02:29Why not
00:02:31When the hangman is in bed
00:02:34And my getaway is in the tides
00:02:38Inside my head
00:02:51These frostbitten feet
00:02:54Fail to feel
00:02:59This rotten wood makes for worthy oars
00:03:07Roll out and hold tight
00:03:10And tell me, dear jerkin' tail
00:03:14That I'm well beswept to see
00:03:17That I'm well beswept to see for sure
00:03:25What you plan on doing tonight, my friend?
00:03:32I'm thinking
00:03:34Of killing myself
00:03:39Why not
00:03:41When you've forgotten how to find my face
00:03:45And the edge of the earth
00:03:47Is calling me by my name
00:04:11Hello, it's your EMC again.
00:04:13Sorry, sorry to disturb you. I'd like to welcome...
00:04:16Welcome the new emcees to the wedding.
00:04:20Breakfast.
00:04:24One, please.
00:04:27Better make it two.
00:04:29It's a wedding. You're not paying the tab.
00:04:34Thank you.
00:04:36Oh, sorry.
00:04:38Holy shit.
00:04:41Jenny.
00:04:42Holy shit. Alexander.
00:04:45Um...
00:04:47Hi.
00:04:51Wow. Your hair has a lot more grey in it.
00:04:55It's also thinning.
00:04:57And you look exactly the same as high school.
00:04:59Apart from all the wrinkles.
00:05:01Oh.
00:05:02So are you joining the rush to get pregnant?
00:05:04Are you kidding me? I hate kids.
00:05:06The whole baby-making process is just disturbing.
00:05:10It's like a parasite that grows inside you for nine months
00:05:13And then almost kills you when it comes out.
00:05:16Be honest with me. Does it ever fully recover?
00:05:19I mean, I feel like the structural integrity would just be heavily compromised.
00:05:24No, I'd block it out.
00:05:25I don't want to sit around talking about post-birth vagina trauma.
00:05:30I just feel like it would render my penis completely ineffectual.
00:05:33As opposed to moderately ineffectual.
00:05:35Exactly.
00:05:36What's going on with you and filmmaking?
00:05:39Not much.
00:05:40Are you working on anything?
00:05:42Not really.
00:05:43You sound very busy.
00:05:44I'm also living with my parents again.
00:05:46Oh my god!
00:05:54Do you still have a thing for Stephanie?
00:05:57Correction. We still have a thing for each other.
00:06:00Oh. What's your hang-up with her?
00:06:02Have you ever just been with someone that you intrinsically understand on every level?
00:06:07That you just totally get and everything fits together perfectly?
00:06:12No.
00:06:13All I'm saying is right now, me and her, there's no obstacles.
00:06:18Well, that guy she's with looks like a pretty well-built obstacle.
00:06:23I'm sure they're just friends.
00:06:25With benefits.
00:06:26Jesus! I forgot how much shit you like to give me.
00:06:30It's kind of refreshing.
00:06:32Oh shit, there they are.
00:06:36Wish me luck.
00:06:46Let's all welcome the lovely newlyweds, Henry and Isabel.
00:06:54After four happy years and a small baby, Henry and Isabel finally decided to tie the knot.
00:07:02Except for Henry to get a vasectomy.
00:07:07But now, it's time for the culmination of our evening.
00:07:12Getting drunk!
00:07:16Let's go to the dance floor and watch Isabel and Henry have their first dance together.
00:07:23Alright guys, let's go.
00:07:33I'll be your love.
00:07:37Then I'll have to play friend.
00:07:45Either way, that's fine.
00:07:49Congratulations.
00:07:51Apart from all the sweating, you did really well.
00:07:56Where's your date anyway? Are you single?
00:07:58Yes.
00:08:00Interesting.
00:08:01You?
00:08:03Yes.
00:08:04Typical.
00:08:06I'm kind of in the market for a new best friend.
00:08:09Interesting?
00:08:10I actually have best friends already, but thank you for asking.
00:08:15It was worth a shot.
00:08:19Now if you'll excuse me, destiny calls.
00:08:26Hey.
00:08:28Hey.
00:08:32So?
00:08:33So, so, so.
00:08:37You were really good.
00:08:38Thank you.
00:08:39Marriage, huh?
00:08:40And kids.
00:08:41Terrifying.
00:08:44That could have been you.
00:08:45What, me and Henry? I don't think so, that was high school.
00:08:50But it does mean...
00:08:52What?
00:08:53Well, you can't really complain about...
00:08:57Us.
00:08:58Us.
00:08:59I'm just saying, I'm here, you're here.
00:09:02My date's here too.
00:09:03Right.
00:09:04So that means us will have to wait a little while longer.
00:09:07Well that's the part I love, the waiting.
00:09:09I love waiting ten years.
00:09:15I'll text you.
00:09:20Just an old friend, okay?
00:09:29Bye.
00:09:34Bye.
00:09:59Bye.
00:10:18The booze is gone, the party's over.
00:10:22What say me and you go back to my place and...
00:10:25And I kept the nightcap.
00:10:27To your parents' place?
00:10:29That is where I live.
00:10:33Fuck it.
00:10:34Tonight's been a whole lot more entertaining than I thought it would be.
00:10:37Why not?
00:10:57Why not?
00:11:10Why would I lie?
00:11:13Hi.
00:11:16Hi.
00:11:17Oh, Dad.
00:11:19Dad, this is Jenny, you remember?
00:11:23This is Dad.
00:11:24You can call me Roy.
00:11:26It's a very lovely house, it's beautiful.
00:11:28You should try paying the mortgage on it.
00:11:31Do you know, I remember you.
00:11:33Gemma.
00:11:34Jenny.
00:11:35Jenny, Jenny.
00:11:36My, how you've changed.
00:11:38All right, Dad, calm down.
00:11:40No, no, all I'm saying is that I remember this teenager,
00:11:43who used to come round and visit Alex.
00:11:45Now I have this beautiful young woman standing in front of me.
00:11:49Not that young.
00:11:50Do you know, I don't know why you hang around with this lower butt.
00:11:53You tried to get rid of him 11 years ago, but look, here he is.
00:11:57Thank you, Dad.
00:11:58You can go.
00:11:59Oh, I can go in my own house.
00:12:02Oh.
00:12:03Oh, no, here we go.
00:12:05Our wayward son has returned, and with a guest.
00:12:08Jenny, you remember my mum?
00:12:10Jenny, of course.
00:12:12Oh, Dad, nice to see you.
00:12:17Okay, can we wrap up this love fest?
00:12:19I didn't bring her to hang out with my parents.
00:12:21I remember you always coming and staying the night when Alex was about 16.
00:12:26How come you two never got together?
00:12:28I started dating someone else.
00:12:30A stripper.
00:12:31She wasn't a stripper when we were going out.
00:12:33Well, that's a shame, because you're much too good for him now.
00:12:36I know.
00:12:38I remember when I first met Roy.
00:12:40It was at one of those university parties we used to have.
00:12:44Yes, that's right.
00:12:45I saw your mother from across the room.
00:12:48My gosh, she was beautiful.
00:12:50Your father was so intense.
00:12:52Anyway, back in the day, if I liked a girl, I used to stare at her.
00:12:58I wouldn't take my eyes off her, which is exactly what I was doing.
00:13:01He was making me blush.
00:13:04But I was quite taken with him.
00:13:06Eventually, I went over, and we hit it off.
00:13:13And what was it that you were attracted to?
00:13:15He was interested in talking about politics and life and changing the world,
00:13:18and that was just so different from all the other men I'd been dating at that time.
00:13:21Well, I think it's great that you two found each other and have stayed together.
00:13:25I just think it's because we met when we were so young.
00:13:28Not everyone can be so fortunate.
00:13:31Oh, are you talking about me again?
00:13:34No, you're single because you're living with us, and you're unemployed.
00:13:39I'm writing?
00:13:40Facebook updates don't count as writing.
00:13:43My mum, ladies and gentlemen.
00:13:45Alex, it's not all about you.
00:13:59So, this is your room.
00:14:04It hasn't changed much since high school.
00:14:06Actually, I just got most of this stuff.
00:14:15Are you trying to lure me to your bedroom, get me drunk, and then have your dirty way with me?
00:14:21Um, no.
00:14:23You're safe.
00:14:25It's just that we can't stop drinking.
00:14:27Because if we stop drinking, then it's hangovers and pain and reality.
00:14:35And if we keep going, we might not have to ever face any of it.
00:14:39I will drink to that.
00:14:46You are pretty cool.
00:14:50You are pretty fucking cool.
00:14:52Oh, you've only just realised.
00:14:54It's more like I just remembered that.
00:15:00Tonight.
00:15:04Well, you are pretty cool also.
00:15:10But not as cool as me.
00:15:12But you're definitely not the big shot jerk-off filmmaker that everyone says you are.
00:15:16No, I'm more just a jerk-off these days.
00:15:21Correct.
00:15:26Oh, no.
00:15:28What?
00:15:30I think I feel those things coming on.
00:15:32What things?
00:15:33Hangover, pain, reality.
00:15:38How do we stop them?
00:15:40Right now, I could really go for a spoon.
00:15:44I would spoon the shit out of you.
00:15:47I would give you the spooning of a lifetime.
00:15:49Do it.
00:16:07Good?
00:16:09Yeah.
00:16:11Yeah.
00:16:34Alexander, this is your future self speaking.
00:16:39You've got to stop masturbating so much.
00:16:42Or your penis will wither up like a tiny little raisin.
00:16:47And drop to the ground and be eaten by pigeons.
00:16:51Alexander.
00:16:55What?
00:17:10I've got to go.
00:17:12You're just going to spoon me and leave me?
00:17:15Come by the coffee shop.
00:17:17I'll make you the best coffee.
00:17:19Okay.
00:17:21I've got to try and get up and give you a hug.
00:17:25Okay.
00:17:39No good.
00:17:50I'll just show myself out.
00:18:04Hey, babe. Sorry I couldn't hang out last night.
00:18:07But I'm keen to go out with you tonight.
00:18:09If you're not too old and pathetic to handle drinking two nights in a row, that is.
00:18:17Definitely not old or pathetic.
00:18:22Feel great today.
00:18:26Totally up for another big one.
00:18:38Come on.
00:18:53Get out of there.
00:19:08Are you not having a big night?
00:19:11No.
00:19:15Yes.
00:19:17It was nice to meet you.
00:19:23You again.
00:19:24Me again.
00:19:28You know, I thought after last night you might not make it.
00:19:30Didn't even phase me.
00:19:32Good. Because that's for you.
00:19:34Awesome.
00:19:36Bottoms up.
00:19:47Come.
00:20:01Kiss me.
00:20:06Kiss me.
00:20:26Have some.
00:20:28No.
00:20:33Alex, you need to stop overthinking everything and just be.
00:20:48You're supposed to do one up each nostril, not both at once.
00:20:50Why?
00:20:51Well, now you're going to have a lopsided butt.
00:20:53Oh, fuck.
00:20:59Have a good night.
00:21:01Bye.
00:21:28How do you feel?
00:21:34Good.
00:21:36Good.
00:21:59Aren't you worried?
00:22:01About what?
00:22:03About all this.
00:22:05The lifestyle, modelling, people paying you all that attention.
00:22:11One day soon it'll all be gone.
00:22:13Well, no one can be prepared for getting old.
00:22:17That's what I'm afraid of.
00:22:19Why worry? I mean, in this world,
00:22:24Why worry? I mean, in this moment,
00:22:29this moment is all that matters.
00:22:33But what about tomorrow?
00:22:35Tomorrow never comes.
00:22:37Really, it does.
00:22:44Are we going to talk all night?
00:22:51I'm nervous.
00:22:53So am I.
00:22:55Well, you don't look nervous.
00:22:57I'm a good actor.
00:23:00It's just that there's been all this build-up and anticipation and talk,
00:23:06and I feel like if it's not the most amazing, magical thing in the whole world,
00:23:10you'll think we failed.
00:23:12I won't think that.
00:23:14Besides, we're definitely not sleeping together.
00:23:19Good. I mean, I wasn't expecting that we would.
00:23:22Good, cos we won't.
00:23:24Good.
00:23:26Good.
00:23:27Good.
00:23:38Just say the lines. It's a screen test.
00:23:41Just say the lines. It's difficult.
00:23:44Come on, this is stupid.
00:23:46It's acting.
00:23:48You could stand here with me.
00:23:50I'm the director. I don't act.
00:23:52Come on, please, please, please, Alex, please, please, please.
00:23:56Oh.
00:23:57Please, please, please, please, please.
00:23:59Okay, just let me get a frame.
00:24:08Tommy, ever since we met,
00:24:13I knew there was something there.
00:24:17It wasn't anything specific.
00:24:20It was just this way you had about you.
00:24:25And I knew that if you'd just once notice me,
00:24:30if you'd just once look into my eyes,
00:24:35you would see how much I care about everything that was going on for you
00:24:39and how I just wanted you to be happy.
00:24:47And you would know that we're meant to be together.
00:24:53Because I love you, Tommy.
00:25:01Was that okay?
00:25:04Yeah.
00:25:05Do you want me to do it again?
00:25:08No, I think you got it.
00:25:09Okay.
00:25:16Okay.
00:25:34Good morning.
00:25:35Morning.
00:25:41I have to go shower.
00:25:43Okay.
00:25:45So, now what?
00:25:49I'll text you.
00:25:51Cool.
00:25:53When?
00:25:54Soon, when I'm not so busy.
00:25:56Some of us have jobs to go to, you know?
00:26:15Okay.
00:26:45Hi.
00:26:53Hi.
00:26:54Come on in.
00:26:55So, what are we doing?
00:26:57Come in.
00:27:00Take a seat.
00:27:06Look what I found.
00:27:09Oh, no.
00:27:11You found...
00:27:12Do we have to?
00:27:13Yes, we absolutely have to.
00:27:16And afterwards, we can get really stoned.
00:27:19We can make some really bad food.
00:27:22It'll probably taste really good and we'll probably just laugh.
00:27:28You tricked me.
00:27:30Yeah.
00:27:38It's you.
00:27:41Cool.
00:27:43What is it?
00:27:45I told you, there's nothing there.
00:28:11Yay!
00:28:20That was really good.
00:28:23Oh, come on.
00:28:24You're being too hard on yourself.
00:28:25There was heaps of funny stuff in there.
00:28:27It's a horror film.
00:28:28Yeah.
00:28:30Well, I didn't yawn.
00:28:32I guess that's something.
00:28:34And you can make a funny one next time.
00:28:37Because you know how.
00:28:40Now can we get stoned?
00:28:41Yes.
00:29:07You know, this is so much better than what I was going to be doing.
00:29:10Crying and masturbating.
00:29:12Um, not necessarily in that order.
00:29:15Mm.
00:29:16Okay.
00:29:21You know, this is not terrible to look at.
00:29:26You are so charming.
00:29:28How come you're still single?
00:29:30Oh.
00:29:31Come on.
00:29:32You can tell me.
00:29:33Please remember.
00:29:34Okay.
00:29:36I was in a big relationship.
00:29:39And I thought it was going to be until death do us part.
00:29:42And then one day he didn't want to be with me anymore.
00:29:47Just like that?
00:29:48Yeah.
00:29:49Or he was scared or he was bored or he wanted something different.
00:29:54And I'm kind of crazy.
00:29:56So I guess he kind of got fed up of my kind of crazy.
00:30:00You're not that crazy.
00:30:01Yeah, but you are kind of crazy.
00:30:04So you don't recognize crazy.
00:30:07Well, I think you're more crazy than me.
00:30:09Yes, but I'm normal.
00:30:11Uh-huh.
00:30:13What about you?
00:30:14Why are you single?
00:30:15Is it because you're holding out for Stephanie?
00:30:17Because that's kind of nice.
00:30:19The thing is, I meet girls, we start dating, everything's great.
00:30:23Mm-hmm.
00:30:25And then at some stage I start noticing their irritating personality traits.
00:30:31Oh.
00:30:32And I start thinking, well, if it's this bad now,
00:30:37imagine how annoying it's going to be in 20 years.
00:30:40And then I panic and then I run away.
00:30:43So basically what you are saying is you are my ex-boyfriend.
00:30:48Yeah.
00:30:49What about your last one?
00:30:50She seemed nice.
00:30:51You mean the Facebook photos of us seem nice?
00:30:53Yeah.
00:30:54Well, everyone's Facebook photos seem nice.
00:30:56That's the problem with our fake digital lives.
00:31:07Can I ask you a question?
00:31:10Don't bullshit me.
00:31:12Okay.
00:31:16On a scale of one to ten,
00:31:19how horny are you right now?
00:31:22Honestly?
00:31:24Honestly.
00:31:26Eleven?
00:31:49Shh.
00:32:12Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down.
00:32:14Do you want to...
00:32:15Shuffle?
00:32:16Shuffle.
00:32:18Ah.
00:32:20Ah.
00:32:21Okay.
00:32:23Got it.
00:32:25Okay.
00:32:26Thank you.
00:32:29No spillage.
00:32:30No spillage.
00:32:33I'm just going to sit here for a while. It's quite loud.
00:32:35You know, when you come, you kind of sound like an English maid from, like, downtown Abbey.
00:32:43What?
00:32:44Yeah, you sound like you're having it off with a butler down in a pantry.
00:32:49And it's so scandalous, you know?
00:32:51You're like...
00:32:56You sound like a caveman who's just discovered fire and is like...
00:33:10I'm going to put this here.
00:33:14Ah.
00:33:22Good?
00:33:24Yeah.
00:33:29Oh.
00:33:30What?
00:33:32Some just came out.
00:33:39How do you feel?
00:33:41Drunk?
00:33:43Relieved.
00:33:46Definitely drunk.
00:33:49So here we are.
00:33:50Well, here you are. I'm not here. I'm back there. Happily back there.
00:33:56All I'm saying is, I'm glad this has happened because it's given me a whole new perspective on things.
00:34:02I hope that one day you can have this feeling.
00:34:05And if me and Stephanie were to have a thing...
00:34:11Yeah.
00:34:13It'll be fine.
00:34:37Good morning.
00:34:41Yeah, it is.
00:34:45Is this going to be weird now?
00:34:47Are you going to make it weird?
00:34:48No, but I mean...
00:34:51Is this like a relationship thing?
00:34:53You think because we fuck so well together that I think we should be in a relationship together?
00:34:59That's so sweet.
00:35:01I'm not jumping to any conclusions. I mean, I didn't really...
00:35:06Well, I guess I kind of did.
00:35:07You cannot take offense at what I'm about to say.
00:35:10That statement always precedes something deeply offensive.
00:35:14Alex, you're an unemployed 29-year-old who still lives with his parents and masturbates too much.
00:35:19And it's great to have a new best friend who cannot get pregnant.
00:35:23And the sex is better than great.
00:35:26But when it comes to actual potential boyfriends, my standards are a little bit higher.
00:35:33I feel like I should be deeply insulted.
00:35:36But you raise some good points.
00:35:39I'm going to wash all the sex off me.
00:35:43Hey.
00:35:45Come in.
00:36:02Hello, stranger.
00:36:07You know, I'm still waiting for a secret boyfriend to jump out of a room and steal you away.
00:36:14There's no boyfriend.
00:36:17It's just me and you.
00:36:19How come it's so hard to get a hold of you?
00:36:21Why do you always have to label everything?
00:36:24I don't.
00:36:25You do.
00:36:26You're cool if we're not totally exclusive.
00:36:31Yeah.
00:36:36I'm gonna go change.
00:37:07See ya.
00:37:24Hey.
00:37:25Hey, yourself.
00:37:28Hey, babe.
00:37:29Hi. How are you?
00:37:30I'm good.
00:37:31You look amazing.
00:37:32Thank you.
00:37:33Doesn't she look amazing, Alex?
00:37:35Yeah, I suppose. She looks okay.
00:37:38I'm sorry, I'm not up to speed here.
00:37:41Sorry, sorry where my man is. This is Steve.
00:37:45This is Stephanie and Alex.
00:37:49Hey.
00:37:50Nice to meet you, Steve.
00:37:52Is this your boyfriend?
00:37:53No, no.
00:37:56We're just on a date.
00:37:59Wow. He's a keeper.
00:38:01Hey.
00:38:04I'm gonna go get a drink and leave you two besties to catch up.
00:38:08No, I mean, I'll go with you.
00:38:10It's cool. I'm just gonna be over here.
00:38:12Wait a second. I know you.
00:38:15Yeah, you're that director from that horror film that everyone hated.
00:38:17Steve, could you get me a drink?
00:38:20Sure, yeah.
00:38:22Thank you.
00:38:25So.
00:38:28Who was that guy?
00:38:29Why?
00:38:30He seemed a little bit rude.
00:38:32You know, I wouldn't go into one of the toilets that he plums
00:38:35and tell him what a shit job he did at the pipe.
00:38:37Yeah, well, he's not a plumber, so.
00:38:39I got a plumber vibe off him.
00:38:40He's a tiler.
00:38:41I was close.
00:38:42Are you jealous?
00:38:43Why would I be jealous of Steve?
00:38:45Good, because if you were jealous of Steve,
00:38:47then I would have to be jealous of the fact that you ditched me to go drinking with Stephanie.
00:38:53Well, lucky none of us are jealous then.
00:38:56Yeah, lucky.
00:38:58Enjoy your night.
00:39:00You too.
00:39:24Um.
00:39:26My friend Mark is having a bit of a hard time at the moment.
00:39:30He really needs me, so I'm going to let him crash on my couch.
00:39:34Really?
00:39:35I'm not stupid.
00:39:36No, it's not like that.
00:39:37Trust me.
00:39:39So your mood seems to have gone downhill since Jenny left with a new date.
00:39:43No, I'd just like to take you someplace quiet where I have you all to myself.
00:39:49Not tonight though.
00:39:51It's been fun.
00:39:55I know.
00:39:58Keep on keeping on.
00:40:00I will.
00:40:06I'm so excited.
00:40:25Cheers.
00:40:56What are you doing?
00:40:57Nothing.
00:40:58What's this?
00:40:59None of your business.
00:41:00Tell me.
00:41:01Get out.
00:41:02Oh, Stephanie.
00:41:06Alex, will you draw me something, please?
00:41:12Please will you draw me something?
00:41:15I only draw pictures to people I actually like, so you've got no chance.
00:41:20And don't tell Henry.
00:41:21So you've got no chance, and don't tell Henry.
00:41:25Hey, relax.
00:41:26I won't.
00:41:52I'm sorry.
00:41:53I'm sorry.
00:42:22What?
00:42:23So I take it Steve didn't work out for you?
00:42:27If Steve worked out for me, I wouldn't just sleep with him.
00:42:32He didn't work out for me.
00:42:34What happened to Stephanie?
00:42:37Tonight, I didn't make the grade either.
00:42:39Ouch.
00:42:40Why are you still awake?
00:42:42I can't sleep.
00:42:43Sometimes it just doesn't happen.
00:42:45It's really annoying.
00:42:46Are you still doing the work?
00:42:48I don't know.
00:42:49Are you still doing the work?
00:42:50I don't sleep.
00:42:51I prefer to stay up all night worrying about things.
00:42:54Dick.
00:42:59I've been trying to tire myself out, but it's just not the same without someone else.
00:43:08What were you thinking about?
00:43:10None of your business.
00:43:12If it was about me, is it still none of my business?
00:43:20Can I come over?
00:43:26Okay.
00:43:50Yeah.
00:44:12Busy.
00:44:16How are you doing?
00:44:17Good.
00:44:20Can I help you with something?
00:44:24You're going to stay cooped up in your room playing video games all day?
00:44:27Letting the world pass you by?
00:44:29Do you want a turn?
00:44:31Look, I know people didn't react to your film the way you'd hoped.
00:44:35But you can't just give up.
00:44:36Why not?
00:44:37Because you've worked so hard.
00:44:39Pissing it away over hurt feelings?
00:44:41That's something you're going to regret.
00:44:44And that's coming from somebody who knows.
00:44:49Dad, how do you know Mum was the one?
00:44:54Well, I didn't.
00:44:56One thing led to another and, well, shit kind of worked out.
00:45:01That's it?
00:45:02Well, basically.
00:45:03But you must have known something.
00:45:05Look, how are you going to know?
00:45:07I knew that I loved your mother and I wanted to make a go of it.
00:45:12And it's worked out for me.
00:45:14And it's lucky for you.
00:45:16Otherwise you would have been a stain on my underpants.
00:45:18Of course.
00:45:25Alex, your mother and I would like you to move out.
00:45:49What are you doing here so early?
00:45:53Oh no.
00:45:55Facebook told me.
00:45:56Oh no, you didn't have to.
00:45:58I didn't really.
00:46:03Napkins for your artwork.
00:46:06That is funny.
00:46:08I also got you a card.
00:46:13To my new best friend on her birthday.
00:46:17An important reminder to never grow up so that you don't become like my old best friend.
00:46:23That is a load of shit.
00:46:28Thank you.
00:46:39Thank you for my birthday present.
00:46:42Thank you for my birthday present.
00:46:46There's one more thing.
00:46:47What?
00:46:48Yeah.
00:46:58Did you do that?
00:47:00Well, yeah.
00:47:01I mean, a lot of the other napkins would kind of bring the place down.
00:47:05You know, it's been very difficult to concentrate at work since we did it.
00:47:10I actually like this. I've got shit to do.
00:47:13We really have to do this more often.
00:47:16What about Stephanie?
00:47:19We've had that discussion. We're not exclusive.
00:47:22Okay.
00:47:26Is that a problem?
00:47:27No. Why would that be a problem?
00:47:39Hello?
00:47:57Hey mum, can this wait? I'll be home in a minute.
00:47:59No, no, Alex. It's your dad.
00:48:02Look, I know what he said about me moving out, and I understand, I do, but...
00:48:07No, Alex. Dad, he's gone.
00:48:12What are you talking about gone?
00:48:14He's dead, Alex.
00:48:21I don't know. I tried. I tried to.
00:48:26There was nothing I could do.
00:48:28I really tried.
00:48:30But he's dead.
00:48:33He's dead.
00:48:36Please, Alex, can you...
00:48:59Alex.
00:49:02We're so sorry.
00:49:12If there's anything we can do...
00:49:22Excuse me.
00:49:32I'm so sorry.
00:49:36I don't know what to say.
00:49:38It just happened. It was one of those things.
00:49:42Is your mum okay?
00:49:44She's really struggling.
00:49:47And you?
00:50:02Hey.
00:50:05It just doesn't feel real.
00:50:08I want to help, but I know that anything that I do or I say isn't going to change anything.
00:50:32It's okay.
00:50:48I'm sorry, could you just give me a minute?
00:51:01I'm sorry.
00:51:19Oh, dear.
00:51:24I don't know how he's doing. I mean, he looks like he's handling it well.
00:51:31It's okay.
00:51:39When you go through deep waters, I will be with you.
00:51:43You will not be burned up.
00:51:45The flames will not consume you.
00:51:48Then shall come to pass the saying that is written,
00:51:51death is swallowed up in victory.
00:52:01I'm sorry.
00:52:24I know what it's like to lose someone.
00:52:28How do you go on?
00:52:30You keep living, and one day it's less painful,
00:52:34and then one day it's not everything that you think about.
00:52:39I just wish I hadn't been such an insufferable prick to him sometimes.
00:52:43You mean you wish you hadn't been such an insufferable cunt to him sometimes?
00:52:46What?
00:52:49There's a smile.
00:52:51And how do you know saying something like that wouldn't just send me over the edge?
00:52:56Because I know you, Alex Lucas. I know you better than you think I do.
00:53:02But your dad, he loved you very much.
00:53:06And that's what you should think about, not the mistakes.
00:53:18Mum wants to sell the house.
00:53:21I'm thinking of going back to London, starting again.
00:53:26What's the point of coming back then?
00:53:28I'm just going to have some childhood do-over.
00:53:31Don't you spend a lot of your time wishing you were a kid again?
00:53:34No. Why should I?
00:53:37When you were a kid, you believed in fairy tales,
00:53:41in magic, and in the impossible.
00:53:44There was this amazing adventure waiting to happen around every corner.
00:53:49And then you grow up, and you realise that none of that stuff is real.
00:53:54It was a lie. And we're not invincible.
00:53:59Look, I may not believe in fairy tales, but I believe in me.
00:54:04You know, I know who I am, and for the most part, I'm happy because I choose to be.
00:54:11You know, life keeps happening, whether you want it to or not.
00:54:17And you can't go backwards.
00:54:21Well, it's getting late. I should go.
00:54:23I've had enough of being an adult for one day.
00:54:25Alex.
00:54:26Thanks for being there for me.
00:54:29You're a good friend.
00:54:51I'm so sorry.
00:54:55I hate seeing you like this. It's awful.
00:54:59Is there anything I can get you?
00:55:09Say when.
00:55:11When?
00:55:14How come?
00:55:16After all these years, we're still doing this.
00:55:20You had other stuff going on.
00:55:22No, I didn't.
00:55:23Parties, modelling, you were going out with Henry.
00:55:28Other guys.
00:55:30No.
00:55:32You're different.
00:55:34You see through all that bullshit.
00:55:37I liked that about you.
00:55:39I was the most obnoxious.
00:55:42Yeah.
00:55:43Irritating.
00:55:44Yeah.
00:55:46Brutally honest version of myself.
00:55:50For some crazy reason, you liked me in spite of that.
00:55:55I liked you because of it.
00:56:01I am really drunk.
00:56:04Don't listen to me, okay?
00:56:16Are you gonna be okay?
00:56:19No.
00:56:21But I'll worry about it tomorrow.
00:56:24Alex.
00:56:26I'm always here for you.
00:56:29I'll always be here for you.
00:56:45Shit.
00:57:16Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:57:19Wake up.
00:57:20What the fuck?
00:57:21Wake up.
00:57:22I'm awake, okay?
00:57:23Clearly, I'm awake.
00:57:24I'm talking to you.
00:57:25You are coming with me.
00:57:27When?
00:57:29Wait.
00:57:31We're going on an adventure.
00:57:46Can we try a less walkie type of adventure?
00:57:49Yeah, let's have a party.
00:57:52How do you know about this place anyway?
00:57:54Because I don't spend all my spare time joking off in my room.
00:57:59I also go to the gym.
00:58:46Pew, pew, pew, pew.
00:58:50What am I doing?
00:58:52What are you doing?
00:58:54I'm shooting for the moon.
00:58:57What's that saying?
00:58:59Shoot for the moon.
00:59:01If you miss, you'll end up floating aimlessly through the infinite blackness of the cosmos.
00:59:10Tell me what's going on.
00:59:13When it's night time and I see the stars out, I think about how small we all are.
00:59:21And then I think about my dad.
00:59:24And I think about the people that I care about dying.
00:59:28And I get scared.
00:59:33I know a part of me feels like there'll be a relief.
00:59:41I wish I was more religious. Maybe then I'd feel better about it.
00:59:45So you can be afraid of living as well as dying.
00:59:50I guess it doesn't pay to look too far into the future for anyone.
00:59:54I believe there's something else.
00:59:56Why?
00:59:57Because where else does it all go?
01:00:01Where does what go?
01:00:03This and this and this.
01:00:11It can't just all disappear.
01:00:15Can it?
01:00:16No.
01:00:18I think it has to take on another form.
01:00:22So what does it mean?
01:00:24I don't know.
01:00:28I guess it means that I think that there is magic in the world if you're willing to believe in it.
01:00:34And even if there isn't, you can't hurt to enjoy the illusion, right?
01:01:57Alex, hi.
01:02:25You never answer your phone. Never pick up your phone.
01:02:29I guess I'll just wait until you get here.
01:02:33I'll see you soon. I'll see you really soon.
01:02:35Okay. Oh God. Okay. Bye.
01:02:43Hi.
01:02:44Hey.
01:02:46Come in.
01:02:53So I was thinking we could do a leprechaun movie marathon.
01:02:58And we can just have sex during the boring bits slash films.
01:03:02I even got the one where he's in the hood.
01:03:07Okay. Some of the films aren't that bad.
01:03:09I'm pregnant.
01:03:10What?
01:03:12I'm pregnant.
01:03:17That's not something you should be joking about.
01:03:19I'm not joking. I'm serious. I just took three tests.
01:03:25Is it mine?
01:03:26Don't.
01:03:27Are you sure?
01:03:28Yes. I'm fucking sure.
01:03:30But you're on the pill.
01:03:31Well, apparently it's not 100% effective. Clearly.
01:03:47Do you want anything?
01:03:58When are you going to abort it?
01:04:01When am I going to abort it?
01:04:03You hate kids. I hate kids.
01:04:06They ruin lives.
01:04:08I mean, neither of us want to become a casualty of a stupid kid like our friends.
01:04:13I mean, we just had that conversation, right?
01:04:15Yeah.
01:04:16No.
01:04:18I mean, yes, but I just don't know. It's different.
01:04:23How is it different? We have awesome sex together. That's our thing. That's what we do.
01:04:28How could we possibly have a kid?
01:04:31Is that all this is to you?
01:04:35Isn't it to you?
01:04:36Why are you making this so awful?
01:04:39Look, I'm just saying that, you know, maybe this isn't black and white.
01:04:43Maybe this at least deserves some discussion.
01:04:45Do you want to keep it?
01:04:46No, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying that this isn't something that we should be taking lightly.
01:04:57What the hell is Stephanie going to think?
01:04:58Who cares what Stephanie thinks?
01:05:00Do you think that she's still going to want to see me if she finds out that I've knocked up some other girl?
01:05:05Are you really that fucking arrogant?
01:05:07This has got nothing to do with Stephanie. This is a complete accident and I'm just trying to figure out how to deal with it.
01:05:12You know, just for the record, Stephanie does not like you as much as you like to think she does.
01:05:15How would you know?
01:05:19Come on, how would you know? What makes you such an expert?
01:05:22Because you slept with Henry.
01:05:24Yeah, ten years ago.
01:05:25No, like a month ago.
01:05:39You're just saying that because you're jealous.
01:05:41No, I am saying this because, yes, I'm jealous, but I'm saying this because you're my best friend.
01:05:52And you know this how?
01:05:53Because he told me when I went to visit him.
01:05:57He's still my friend, Alex, even if you've decided that you can't hang out with him anymore because he has a family.
01:06:05You don't know what you're talking about.
01:06:07You don't know what you're talking about.
01:06:09This isn't one of your stories and everything is going to turn out just as you planned.
01:06:13You know, the reality is Stephanie doesn't give a shit about you.
01:06:16She doesn't have to.
01:06:17She knows that just like a faithful dog, you're going to come scurrying back for whatever script she chooses to throw your way.
01:06:22Well, good fucking luck.
01:06:24What are you going to do?
01:06:25Don't worry.
01:06:26I won't tell anyone it's yours.
01:06:27You can go back to pining over Stephanie.
01:06:29What, so that's it? You're just going to keep it?
01:06:30I don't know.
01:06:34But I do know that I never want to see you again.
01:06:37So you can go back to your spoiled life and your imaginary girlfriend.
01:06:40You can just get out.
01:06:48Get out.
01:06:51Get out!
01:07:02You know, when you asked me if there was ever anybody that I intrinsically understood on every level,
01:07:08that person was you, Alex.
01:07:10And it was obvious to everybody except you.
01:07:33Fuck.
01:07:39Fuck.
01:07:45Fuck.
01:07:51Fuck.
01:07:58Fuck.
01:08:00Fuck.
01:08:28Fuck.
01:08:40Alex!
01:08:41Hi!
01:08:42Oh my gosh!
01:08:43I haven't seen you in ages.
01:08:44It's good to see you.
01:08:46Come in.
01:08:47Is, is Henry in?
01:08:48He's working late.
01:08:49You remember working, don't you Alex?
01:08:50Come in.
01:08:51Come on.
01:08:54Take a seat.
01:08:55He'll be home any minute.
01:09:00So how are you?
01:09:02I've been better.
01:09:04It's always the end of the world with you, isn't it Alex?
01:09:07Well, this time it really is.
01:09:09Yes, I'm sure it is.
01:09:11We need to find you a nice girl.
01:09:12You're always so much happier when you're seeing someone.
01:09:18And food too, you like food.
01:09:19Let me get you something.
01:09:24Cheer you up.
01:09:27And I'll make us coffees.
01:09:28Do you still like mochas?
01:09:30Okay.
01:09:37Can I ask you something?
01:09:38Yeah, of course.
01:09:40If you knew something about someone that you really cared about,
01:09:46and this information could hurt someone else you really cared about,
01:09:56would you tell them?
01:10:01I think that, um,
01:10:04I think that sometimes when we really care about someone,
01:10:11we choose to believe the best in them no matter what anybody else tells us.
01:10:17Because otherwise it's too hard to go on.
01:10:25Here you go.
01:10:33Hey, hun.
01:10:34Hey.
01:10:35Look who appeared on our doorstep.
01:10:39So what's up?
01:10:40I haven't seen you for a while.
01:10:46So you know.
01:10:47You just got fucking married.
01:10:48What the fuck were you thinking?
01:10:49What do you want me to say, Alex?
01:10:51That I'm kind of an asshole?
01:10:53No, I just don't understand.
01:10:56Isabel is the nicest person.
01:10:58Look, all of this is not the fairy tale we pretend it is, okay?
01:11:02Yeah, we're broke.
01:11:03We're exhausted.
01:11:05The baby doesn't sleep.
01:11:07Izzy's completely lost her sex drive.
01:11:08She's moody as fuck.
01:11:11Look, I was bored and lonely.
01:11:15Why didn't you tell me it was like this?
01:11:17Because I hate, I hate fucking admitting it, okay?
01:11:21You were right.
01:11:22Sometimes this is unbearable.
01:11:25Besides, we don't hang out anymore.
01:11:26When was the last time you came over here and didn't look like you want to blow your brains out?
01:11:34I'm sorry.
01:11:35Forget it.
01:11:38Just don't tell anyone, all right?
01:11:42They might drive me crazy, but I love them.
01:11:49I learnt my lesson.
01:12:02Hey.
01:12:04You haven't been replying to my text messages and my phone calls.
01:12:08Yeah, I didn't really feel like it.
01:12:13Henry told me he told you.
01:12:17Yeah, he did.
01:12:21I'm sorry.
01:12:22We were just really, really drunk and we started reminiscing about old times and one thing led to another and it just kind of happened.
01:12:30Right.
01:12:32I regretted it immediately and I just didn't know how to tell you because it just didn't mean anything.
01:12:44Hey.
01:12:49This whole Alex, Stephanie thing that I build up in my head, it's kind of just bullshit.
01:12:57I was really fucked up and I wasn't thinking straight.
01:13:03You don't love me.
01:13:05You love the idea of me.
01:13:07Come on, do you think that we'd still be doing this after ten years?
01:13:12Come on, Alex.
01:13:14Please.
01:13:26It's just a fantasy.
01:13:37It's not.
01:13:39Wait, so what?
01:13:40What?
01:13:41You're just going to stop seeing me?
01:13:54Do you get it?
01:13:57I'm special.
01:13:59You're never going to find another me.
01:14:01You're never going to have this again.
01:14:09Fuck.
01:14:23Fuck.
01:14:41Is Jenny in?
01:14:43She's busy at the moment.
01:14:45Okay.
01:14:49Can I get a coffee?
01:14:51Jenny's actually said you're not really welcome here anymore so I can't actually serve you.
01:14:57I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
01:15:00No, that's cool.
01:15:01I understand.
01:15:02I'm really sorry.
01:15:03It's totally fine.
01:15:04I'm fine, sorry.
01:15:34I can't believe there's only one week left.
01:15:37What are we all going to do?
01:15:39Well, I know what I'm going to do.
01:15:41I'm going to go to film school and become the next Peter Jackson.
01:15:45What if you don't?
01:15:47I'm pretty sure it's like my destiny.
01:15:51What about you?
01:15:52I honestly don't know.
01:15:54Well, don't you think that you should know?
01:15:56I mean, maybe have a plan?
01:16:00I don't know.
01:16:02It's kind of nice not having any plans.
01:16:32We've watched the movie and to be perfectly honest, it's not great.
01:16:51However, we do see a lot of potential there.
01:16:55Especially taking into account the new writing you've submitted.
01:16:59What I'm saying is, we'd like to represent you, both as a writer and director.
01:17:06However, we don't represent artists who live overseas.
01:17:10So, you'll have to give us your assurance that you're making your move a more permanent one.
01:17:21Come on.
01:17:22Would it kill you to say that you've missed me?
01:17:25You're still mad, huh?
01:17:26Oh, Arthur.
01:17:27I don't care enough about you to be one way or the other.
01:17:30Don't you think back to all the good times?
01:17:33We had something special.
01:17:35It all seems like just a dream now.
01:17:37Why?
01:17:38You've got to hold on to your dreams, Cathy.
01:17:40Close your eyes.
01:17:41Let me take you back there.
01:17:43It's reacquaintancing.
01:17:45That is definitely not a word.
01:17:49So, are you going to tell me about this film?
01:17:54I don't know.
01:17:56What do you do when your dream comes true and nothing happens?
01:18:02Get a new dream, I guess.
01:18:09You never liked anything you could have until you couldn't have it anymore.
01:18:13It was a mistake.
01:18:14I was young and stupid.
01:18:16Well, one of those things is still true.
01:18:18That must be why I like you.
01:18:25MUSIC PLAYS
01:18:29PHONE VIBRATES
01:18:52Expecting a call, are you?
01:18:55Not really.
01:18:57So why have you got your head on the phone when you could be appreciating this?
01:19:02What?
01:19:04Life.
01:19:08I was just hoping to hear from someone.
01:19:10Ah, I see.
01:19:12Hoping to get a call from a girl.
01:19:15Girlfriend?
01:19:17Not exactly.
01:19:18Someone you'd like to be your girlfriend?
01:19:20Probably not.
01:19:23Probably not.
01:19:24Definitely not if you're standing here waiting for her to call you.
01:19:29Smoke?
01:19:31I don't smoke.
01:19:32Drink?
01:19:35No, thanks.
01:19:36You don't drink, you don't smoke.
01:19:38You're standing here looking at a phone that's never going to ring.
01:19:41Sounds like a right sad cunt to me.
01:19:47Maybe I will have some of that.
01:19:49That's the spirit.
01:19:53A bit strong.
01:19:56That's an awful accent you have there.
01:19:59Whereabouts are you from?
01:20:01New Zealand.
01:20:03Fuck me. You're a long way from home, mate.
01:20:06What has you over this side of the world?
01:20:10I don't know.
01:20:12You don't know too much, do you?
01:20:14I thought I did.
01:20:16Don't feel bad.
01:20:18Nobody knows anything.
01:20:20The sooner you figure out that, the better off you'll be.
01:20:27You keep it.
01:20:29I think you'll need it more than I will.
01:20:31Do me a favour.
01:20:33Don't stand around waiting for the phone to ring.
01:20:50RAIN FALLS
01:21:21RAIN CONTINUES
01:21:29Hi!
01:21:51DOOR KNOCKS
01:22:01Just give me one second.
01:22:03Look, will you just give me one second to talk, please?
01:22:06Why? Why should I?
01:22:08Please. I hate you.
01:22:10I know. I fucked everything up.
01:22:12I ruined it, and I'm sorry.
01:22:15I don't care that you're sorry.
01:22:18Look, I was chasing a stupid fucking dream about a girl
01:22:21that didn't even exist when there was someone ten times better
01:22:24lying in bed right next to me.
01:22:26Fuck you, Alex.
01:22:28You don't deserve any of my time.
01:22:37Can you open the door, please?
01:22:39Fuck off!
01:22:47SHE GASPS
01:22:53I moved out of my parents'.
01:22:55So? You're just going to run away again when things get too tough?
01:22:58I know you, Alex. You're just a boy.
01:23:01No, I tried running away, OK?
01:23:06You know, when I see a girl with dark brown hair,
01:23:10I stop and I wait for her to turn,
01:23:14hoping it's you, wherever I am.
01:23:19Not because we'd talk or you'd be happy to see me,
01:23:22but just so for one moment I would catch a glimpse of you in real life.
01:23:26And I know that's sad and desperate,
01:23:30but that's how much I miss you.
01:23:36You know, I used to not get up in the morning
01:23:39because I had nothing better to do than sleep.
01:23:43And now I don't get up because when I dream
01:23:46is the only time that I see you.
01:23:49And we're still together.
01:23:52And it's amazing.
01:23:54And it's so much better than real life,
01:23:57where I fucked everything up and ruined everything.
01:24:06I just want you to give me a chance.
01:24:12I want to have this baby with you.
01:24:17I know I can do this with you because...
01:24:21because I love you. I do.
01:24:24You mean everything to me.
01:24:28You know, I thought being a filmmaker and making movies would make me happy.
01:24:35And...
01:24:38it didn't.
01:24:43But you make me happy.
01:24:47You make me a better person.
01:24:54And once you told me to get a new dream,
01:25:00well, I think you are my new dream.
01:25:12I love you.
01:25:37Why are you doing this to me?
01:25:39I swore that I was never going to see you again. I swore it to myself.
01:25:43So? I swore that I was never going to grow up?
01:25:46I don't even know if I want to be with you.
01:25:49You know, I don't even know if two people can be together forever.
01:25:53Then don't think about forever.
01:25:56Just be my best friend again.
01:26:01You've got so much left to prove.
01:26:05I know.
01:26:09Don't you fucking hurt me again.
01:26:13I won't.
01:26:21Okay.
01:26:22Okay.
01:26:23Okay.
01:26:24Okay.
01:26:39Okay.
01:26:40Okay.
01:26:41Okay.
01:27:09I love you.
01:27:15I love you more.
01:27:17More?
01:27:29There we go.
01:27:30Come here, you.
01:27:34You look terrified.
01:27:35Is it that obvious?
01:27:36Yep.
01:27:37I can't tell who's shit in their pants more, you or him.
01:27:41Actually, no, I'm pretty sure it's him.
01:27:43Oi, Izzy, he's got a... Can you...
01:27:46I'm with my mate.
01:27:47No.
01:27:50You ever change your nappy before?
01:27:52Well, mate, this is your lucky day.
01:27:56Now, in all seriousness,
01:28:00you're going to be fine.
01:28:02I've had that look on my face so many times.
01:28:04You'll be fine, okay?
01:28:07You'll never sleep again, but you'll be fine.
01:28:10Shall we go change your bum?
01:28:12Yeah.
01:28:13Yeah, change your bum.
01:28:34Oi, come on.
01:28:36You're not getting out of it that easy.

Recommended