Taskmaster AU S02E10 2024
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00:00CREEPY MUSIC
00:01FLYING SQUEAK
00:04CLUNK
00:05UGH!
00:06CLUNK
00:07UGH!
00:08CHA-CHING
00:10EH?
00:10CHOKING
00:12PUFF
00:16CHOMP
00:18UGH!
00:18CHOMP
00:19UGH!
00:20CLUNK
00:22No!
00:23UGH!
00:24POP
00:24CREAK
00:26BROKEN
00:27CHOMP
00:28Hello and welcome to the grand finale of Taskmaster Australia Season 2.
00:42This is the final episode of the series and I am the final man.
00:46When I perish, so will every other human being on this planet.
00:51Because I am the Taskmaster.
00:54Tonight we will see our contestants attempt their final set of tasks and by the end of
01:02this show we will have a series champion for which they will receive this, a chocolate
01:08filled gold foil wrapped statue of my glorious head.
01:13This is my tenth time introducing them and I'm almost sick of it but let's do it once
01:20again for good measure.
01:21Our contestants are Anne Edmonds, Jenny Tian, Josh Thomas, Lloyd Langford and Will Anderson.
01:37And by my side a man who yesterday casually told me that he wishes he had a USB port in
01:43his body.
01:45It's Tom Cashman.
01:46How's it going?
01:52Not too bad.
01:53I was just thinking, looking back over the last season, I've been asked a lot to blink
01:56twice if I'm not okay and it occurred to me that's not a very effective way to communicate
02:01a secret message, blinking twice, because you could accidentally blink twice.
02:04I think the saying should be blink 17 times if you're not okay.
02:09Can you do that?
02:1017?
02:11That was 16 because I'm having a ball.
02:20Ironically also what his sex robot looks like when she's malfunctioning.
02:25Alright, what task is first?
02:29We've got a bit of a weird prize task this week.
02:31Lloyd Langford was asked to bring along something he has never heard of.
02:35Everybody else has been asked to bring along something that Lloyd Langford has never heard
02:38of.
02:39Probably the best way to get a gauge of Lloyd from Lloyd himself.
02:48Lloyd, what haven't you heard of?
02:51I was in a record shop outside of Newcastle and I selected a cassette of music and I couldn't
03:01distinguish the name of the band.
03:04Is that the band name at the top there maybe?
03:07I've looked it up.
03:08The band is a Belgian death metal group called Goat Vomit.
03:12Okay, Will, what have you brought in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
03:17Well, it's an iconic Australian television character.
03:21This character right here.
03:22Lloyd, do you know who that is?
03:27I don't know who that is.
03:28It is Humphrey B. Bear, who was an iconic Australian children's TV entertainer.
03:33It was a bear that wore, obviously, a waist jacket, but no pants and entertained children.
03:37But the good news was, never talked.
03:41We had a lot of children's entertainers in the UK that didn't wear pants.
03:49I'd stay silent too if my behaviour was like that.
04:03That was at least 18.
04:05Jenny, what did you bring in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
04:08Throughout this entire series, we know about Lloyd and Anne being married and Lloyd really
04:14loves Anne.
04:15And I know that Lloyd cares about Anne so much, so I have brought him a manual.
04:21Oh, okay.
04:24Okay.
04:26If we take a look inside, this one's about you being rugged and dreamy and how you can
04:41have that boyish charm for Anne.
04:44If we take a look at the next page, here's how to be a prince among men.
04:50And I also know that you have a child, so there's a page in there about really teaching
04:55the next generation how to, you know, move forward and model your behaviour, so this
05:00is the final page.
05:10Can I raise one thing, Jenny?
05:12They're not married.
05:14And that has really ruined Lloyd's surprise for the end of the show he told me about.
05:22Yeah, well, when I allocate points, I might have to factor that in.
05:26Anne, what did you bring in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
05:28I brought in...
05:29Oh, f***.
05:31What?
05:33No, nothing nasty.
05:34Decent shorts.
05:41Because I can't remember which episode, but earlier in the season, we had a task that
05:45was bringing something that seemed the most shit.
05:48Yeah.
05:49And you brought his terrible house shorts.
05:51These house shorts that make me physically sick.
05:53Those shorts that you brought in on an earlier episode were my house shorts, and they shouldn't
05:59be seen by anyone else, and I have, like, outside...
06:03You know I have outside shorts.
06:07So, Josh, what did you bring in that Lloyd hasn't heard of?
06:09Oh, yeah.
06:10Have you heard of...
06:11It's an Australian cartoon character.
06:12It's called Set It Straight, Shirley.
06:15You wouldn't have.
06:16I made her up.
06:17So this is her.
06:18OK.
06:19I was worried there for a while, too.
06:21And what Shirley does is she sets things straight, so what she's doing right now is she's pointing
06:28at just a chess piece holding a sword, and another one, and another one, and another
06:35one, and another one, and another one, and the next thing that she also...
06:44And now what Set It Straight Shirley wants to point at is just some hidden camera footage
06:49that one of the producers took of you saying that you like me.
06:53Just sort of checking.
06:54I mean, it's not a biggie.
06:55Just checking by myself.
06:56I just...
06:57But it's all...
06:58It feels sort of...
06:59Is he worried about it or something?
07:00Oh, just...
07:01No, more just me checking on everyone.
07:02I suppose checking...
07:03Really?
07:04Yeah.
07:05Yeah, yeah, yeah.
07:06I mean, obviously I like Josh, but I'm just...
07:07It's just funny in terms of...
07:08So...
07:09Anyway, that's Set It Straight Shirley.
07:10She just sets things straight.
07:11She just sets things straight.
07:12That's all it is.
07:13All right, this is going to be a tricky one to score, because I'm guessing, Lloyd, you
07:32hadn't heard of all that.
07:34I wish I was a child in Australia.
07:36I mean, H.B. Bumble and Satisfactory Chirley.
07:42H.B. Bumble!
07:45So I'm going to give Lloyd three points,
07:47because he definitely hadn't heard of goat vomit.
07:49And I'm going to place all the others around them.
07:51So I'm going to give Jenny one point,
07:53because unfortunately she got him a husband book
07:55and he's not married.
07:57And then I'm going to give two points to Will,
07:59because he definitely hadn't heard of Humphrey B. Bear,
08:01but it was just a little bit boring.
08:04I'm going to give four points to Josh for Set It Straight Shirley,
08:08which no one had heard of, because he'd made it up.
08:09So definitely hadn't heard of that.
08:11And also I kind of admire the way you made a task
08:14that was supposed to be all about Lloyd all about you.
08:16LAUGHTER
08:20But five points goes to Anne,
08:22because Lloyd definitely doesn't know a decent short song.
08:24Nah.
08:26Five points to Anne.
08:29OK, Tom, let's set the stakes.
08:31We're 10 eps in.
08:32What is the overall scoreboard looking like?
08:35Well, Anne and Lloyd are in the lead on 149 and 145, respectively.
08:40But it's tight enough elsewhere,
08:41the series is still very much up for grabs.
08:43Ooh, OK.
08:45How compelling.
08:47Well, what's first, Tom?
08:48You can have the day off, Taskmaster.
08:50Today I will give myself a hiding.
08:52MUSIC
09:06Hmm.
09:07What's happening here?
09:09No Tom. Tom go home, did he?
09:11Can't hack it.
09:13I don't like it when he's not here.
09:15It always means that I'm going to have to do something
09:17with a lot of exercise.
09:19OK.
09:23Uh, ooh, there's two tasks.
09:25Ooh.
09:26Take the second task to wherever you like on the Taskmaster retreat.
09:30You must not peep at the contents of this second task.
09:33Your time will not begin until you open it.
09:35You have seven minutes to find your spot.
09:37Your time starts now.
09:39So I don't know what the task is,
09:41but I have to find out where the best place to do the task will be.
09:46That's a fun game.
09:48APPLAUSE
09:52Yeah, that was a fun game. Yeah.
09:55Let's see where they wandered to.
09:57Who are we looking at first?
09:58Well, in the spirit of this task, I'll leave that a mystery.
10:02I mean, in a way it doesn't really matter where I go
10:04because I don't know what the task is in the first place.
10:07I could go into the caravan
10:09because there's a seat in there and I could use a seat.
10:13I'm going to go in the bar.
10:17I feel like I might go to the balcony.
10:20Yeah.
10:22I hope it's not a game of hide-and-seek
10:24where I'm supposed to be hiding.
10:25I do not know what this is going to be, so here we go.
10:28Let's find out.
10:29Avoid being papped by Tom's camera.
10:32Tom has already begun looking for you.
10:34The person who avoids being papped by Tom the longest wins.
10:37Your time starts now.
10:39Am I allowed to close this?
10:42Oh, jeez.
10:46Oh, the fridge is too small.
10:48The fridge is too small for me to sneak into.
10:52Do these shelves move?
11:02I don't know where I'm running from.
11:07It's not the best place in the world to hide, honestly, from a camera.
11:11Do I want to move? That's the question, right?
11:14Like, oh...
11:16Are you getting me?
11:18Damn it! I got you, Jenny.
11:20No!
11:23I feel despondent.
11:25There's a lot of effort to be rigged up with all this cake.
11:28And then be instantly papped.
11:30I mean, it would be hard to beat how badly I have done
11:33unless I was hiding literally in front of you.
11:37I'd like to go somewhere shady.
11:41Avoid being papped by Tom's camera.
11:43Tom has already begun looking for you.
11:45Avoid being papped by Tom, the longest wins.
11:47Your time starts now.
11:51Oh, my God!
11:55That was quite fast.
11:57I was in camouflage on the ground.
12:00Oh.
12:08So, you didn't really wander far. A lot of you there.
12:11I had thought back to the task at the dock when Tom was there
12:16and I was worried about moving too far away
12:19from where the initial task was set.
12:21So, I was just thinking,
12:23I'll just stick around here and see what happens.
12:25My theory was literally, I'll get on the balcony
12:27cos from the balcony I'll be able to see the best of what's going on,
12:30but didn't kind of think through,
12:32that could also work in reverse.
12:35What was your thinking, Jenny?
12:37I just wanted a good seat.
12:39So, Josh. Yeah.
12:41I have to admit, that was bad luck.
12:43No, I wanted to go somewhere shady
12:45because there's a lot of people out there holding equipment
12:48and I thought, if you're going to hold equipment,
12:50we may as well hold it in the shade.
12:52Well, Tom Cashman was under some very shady cloth.
12:55Yeah.
12:56You should have maybe climbed under there.
12:58If I got under the cloth, then I probably could have held you down
13:01and stopped you being able to touch the camera
13:03and we could have had a fun, sexy wrestle.
13:06No, yeah, we all saw it.
13:09Alright, we need some scores.
13:11I papped Lloyd within 13 seconds.
13:14Jenny within 21 seconds.
13:16Will within 30 seconds.
13:18Josh within two seconds.
13:20LAUGHTER
13:21Alright.
13:23Right, these four being horrible at hiding from Cashman
13:26and me being an expert in it,
13:28means that during this break,
13:30I'll take them for a little masterclass.
13:32See you after this.
13:34CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
13:43Welcome back to the Taskmaster season finale
13:46where five comedians are doing their best
13:48to win Goat Vomit's Greatest Hits.
13:51How are they going about it, Lesser Tom?
13:53The task is to pick a spot and then open a second task,
13:55and the second task is to avoid being photographed by me
13:58for as long as possible.
13:59So far, Lloyd has been bad at it, Jenny has been bad at it,
14:02Will has been bad at it, and Josh has been really bad at it.
14:05OK.
14:07Well, the burning question, will somebody be good at it?
14:10It's all down to her. Here's Anne Edmonds.
14:12Well, I'm going inside. Bye-bye.
14:20Bit of behind-the-scenes here.
14:22I'll go in the make-up chair.
14:24Maybe I'll just touch up my make-up a bit.
14:27I might just join that in the middle.
14:29That looks good.
14:30I've got about a Marilyn mole there.
14:32That looks nice.
14:33I'll just put that a bit more.
14:36There we go.
14:37Now I'm ready for whatever lies in here.
14:42Avoid being papped by Tom's camera.
14:45Tom has already begun looking for you.
14:47The person who avoids being papped by Tom the longest wins.
14:51I think I can, like, get in this cupboard here.
14:54Even if he comes in here, I don't reckon he's going to see.
15:11Not my feet.
15:18Hi, Anne.
15:21Hi, Tom.
15:22I've got a lovely photo of you.
15:24Yeah.
15:25Have you disguised yourself with a mole?
15:27No, that's just some make-up I've done.
15:29I was attempting to get into this cupboard, you see.
15:31OK.
15:32But clearly I'm stuck.
15:33Yep. I've got a few more photos.
15:35Thank you.
15:37That's good.
15:39Yep, that's nice.
15:41Yep.
15:43Perfect.
15:45Perfect.
15:50Looks like you did a good job, Anne.
15:52Yeah.
15:53I followed instructions.
15:55Yeah.
15:56Yeah, so I got into the make-up room and saw that cupboard
15:59and thought, if I can get in there.
16:01Had I been able to...
16:02I mean, it was full of mattresses,
16:04so it's interesting that I still went,
16:06I can get in there.
16:08So what does that do for the scores for the task?
16:10Well, Anne managed one minute and 43 seconds.
16:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
16:17Somehow, that is by far the longest time.
16:20That gives Josh one point, Lloyd two, Jenny three, Will four,
16:24and the winner of the task is Anne, with five points.
16:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
16:29And how are we looking for the episode's scores so far?
16:33Well, the lady stuck in between the couch and the cupboard
16:35is somehow also our leader.
16:36It's Anne, with ten points.
16:37OK.
16:38I don't know what's going on.
16:40OK, Tom, let's keep the ball rolling.
16:42This is my line that says a task about pipe dreams
16:45is in the pipeline.
17:00It's Robbie.
17:01Hi, Lloyd.
17:02Hello, Tom.
17:03Hi, Will.
17:04Ooh, a label make-up.
17:05I've just got some questions for you, if that's OK.
17:07OK. What's your full name?
17:08Joshua Thomas.
17:09What's your place of birth?
17:11Melbourne.
17:12When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
17:15I mean, I guess my mum wanted me to be...
17:17I know it's very stereotypical, but a doctor,
17:19so I just wanted to be that as well.
17:21I think I wanted to be an actor.
17:22A teacher.
17:23I may want to be a dog trainer.
17:25A professional footballer, an AFL footballer.
17:28What are you up to?
17:33Oh, no.
17:38Apply for the job of actor.
17:40Apply for the job of teacher.
17:43Apply for the job of AFL footballer.
17:45Most impressive job application wins.
17:48You have 30 minutes. Your time starts now.
17:50How do doctors apply for jobs?
17:52So they go through medical school
17:54and then they tend to, like, let loose there.
17:56But then they also do, like, that test with you.
17:58U-map. They do U-map.
17:59You know the three things that that tests?
18:01Comprehension, empathy and logic.
18:03I need you to get me a dog.
18:05I'll see what we can do.
18:11So pretty straightforward.
18:12They just have to apply for the job
18:14that they wanted to do when they were younger.
18:16Who should we see first?
18:17First up, it's Dr Tian.
18:22Welcome to the U-map exam. Comprehend what that is.
18:24A big pencil.
18:25Correct. Comprehend that.
18:27Banana.
18:28How am I feeling now?
18:29Extremely sad.
18:31Square. Square. What's next?
18:33Rhombus.
18:34That is the best U-map exam we've ever seen in our lives.
18:38My God, I'm the top doctor at the top city hospital
18:42and I have no idea how to solve this case.
18:45I can do this.
18:47I have seen this before from all my partying years
18:50when I was in medical school.
18:52Woo-hoo!
18:53I can tell it's a human body.
18:56And comprehension means that I know that this...
19:02..is a rhombus.
19:04Oh, my God.
19:05She's made the best diagnosis I've ever seen in my life.
19:10And that is my application to be a doctor.
19:19So, was that application a gritty reboot of Doogie Howser?
19:23I'm sorry, what is that?
19:25LAUGHTER
19:29Ironically, it was a program where a doctor who was really young
19:34was good at his job.
19:36Are you not going to ask about the head?
19:40Did you not think to go and reattach it as part of your training?
19:43No, this is the way to be a doctor.
19:46Alright, who's next?
19:48Unlike other boys in rural Victoria,
19:50he had a pretty kooky and avant-garde dream.
19:52He wanted to be a professional AFL player.
19:54Will Anderson.
19:56G'day, I'm Will Anderson
19:58and I'm here to apply for the job of AFL footballer.
20:01I'm going to be no good on the field, but I'm amazing at boasting.
20:05Tom from Taskmaster News, you lost the game today. Why was that?
20:08Didn't lose the game. Won the game.
20:10Best game we've ever played. Best game of the season.
20:12We won it. Won it by a lot.
20:14Don't know what you're talking about. You're an idiot.
20:16Also, I'm great at distraction.
20:18Look over there! It's Tom! See? Amazing.
20:21One of your teammates slept with another one of your teammates.
20:23Good on him. Well done.
20:25That's what we like at our club. Bonding.
20:27We're really proud as a bunch to be so close as a team.
20:29Here's what I'm also going to do. Deny.
20:32Deny, deny, deny.
20:33I've read accusations recently that your feet look a bit strange.
20:37Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
20:40Mm-hm. Mm-hm. I don't have feet.
20:43I'm Will Anderson and my goal is to be an AFL footballer.
20:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20:58Did I just see Will Anderson do a good sketch?
21:01I think that might have been just what happened.
21:05I just saw a sketch and you made it.
21:08Yeah. And it was good. Yeah.
21:10Yeah, I mean, I was trying to get inside
21:12what could I do as an AFL footballer these days
21:15and I took a real, I've got to say, Tom Gleeson approach
21:19to answering questions.
21:21It was real... I was very inspired by you in the attitude
21:24of, like, whatever came my way, just embrace it,
21:27send it back to them.
21:28And I've got to be honest with you, it feels good to be you.
21:32It is. It's bloody great.
21:35I know, you get to say all these horrible things and call it humour.
21:38Yeah.
21:41All right. I think that was really good.
21:43It's going to be hard to beat. Who's next?
21:45He wants to be an actor so bad
21:47he's learnt a very convincing Welsh accent for this show.
21:50It's Lloyd Langford.
21:53Hello. My name is Lloyd Langford.
21:56I am an actor of incredible range.
21:58But don't take my word for it.
22:00Here, enjoy my showreel.
22:03Here is action.
22:10Hi-ya!
22:13Here is sadness.
22:15Johnny, you crazy son of a bitch!
22:18What have you done, Johnny?
22:20What am I going to do now, Johnny?
22:23Who's going to look after the kids?
22:28Here is forest-based monster.
22:37Hi-ya!
22:38Hi-ya!
22:44Here is restless baby.
22:54Here is pornographic film star.
22:57Ma'am, your dishwasher is fixed.
23:00Oh, thank you so much, mister.
23:02How can I ever repay you?
23:05Well, I got some ideas.
23:11That was just a small taste
23:14of the many different acting styles
23:17that I, Lloyd Langford, am capable of.
23:20If you need an actor, I'm your man.
23:29To be honest, I just loved it,
23:31cos we got to hear you say here over and over again.
23:34I mean, it was an absolute treat.
23:36Let's play a game now.
23:37Say this word, here.
23:39Here.
23:40Here.
23:41Here.
23:42Here.
23:43Here.
23:44This is no just televised racism.
23:51Welcome to Australia.
23:57Now for you at home to do the most important job of all,
24:00sit through advertisements while you wait for us to return.
24:03Back soon with more job applications on Taskmaster.
24:17Welcome back to the Taskmaster season finale,
24:20where tonight one comedian will take home the big prize
24:23and another will take home Humphrey B. Bear,
24:26or as Lloyd Langford calls him, miscellaneous yellow fedora bear.
24:31Tom, what's going on?
24:32Our contestants are trying to land their dream jobs
24:34via video applications.
24:35OK, who's next?
24:36She wanted to be a teacher, so let me be the first to say,
24:39good morning, Miss Edmund.
24:43Principal Cashman, thank you so much for seeing me.
24:46Thanks for coming in, Mrs Edmund.
24:48Thank you, no problem.
24:49The main thing I think we're missing a lot
24:51in the education system today is discipline.
24:54OK.
24:55I've got a little student here, that's Phil there,
24:58and he's been a very naughty boy.
25:00One of the best things I could do as a teacher
25:02would be to give you a little demonstration
25:04of how I would approach this situation.
25:09Hey, Phil!
25:10How's it going?
25:11Good, thanks.
25:12You're going to be doing Phil as well?
25:14Yep, if you could not interrupt.
25:16Oh, sorry.
25:17Sue, Phil, yesterday...
25:19Where were you, buddy?
25:20Where were you?
25:21I was up the back.
25:22No, you weren't.
25:23You weren't up the back, Phil.
25:25I was.
25:26You were.
25:27Oh, what's that smell?
25:28Ain't having a few darts, have we?
25:30No, my dad smokes.
25:31You don't even have a dart!
25:33We don't need scum like you, Phil,
25:35messing up my perfect record.
25:37Now I've got a little black stain on my record,
25:40a little Phil stain.
25:41Can we make a little Phil stain?
25:43So that's more or less my application.
25:46Thanks, Principal Cashman.
25:48Thanks a lot.
25:50APPLAUSE
25:54And I'm not surprised to say that was disturbing.
25:59I mean, it's a job application.
26:01Yes.
26:02And I mean, I enjoyed it as entertainment,
26:04but I would not send my children to your school.
26:07I've met your children.
26:08You probably should.
26:10LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
26:15My children will watch this show, they'll be like,
26:17yeah, fair enough.
26:19All right, anyone left?
26:20This old dog wants to learn a new trick
26:22and that trick is teaching tricks to dogs.
26:24It's Josh Thomas.
26:26Ladies and gentlemen,
26:28please welcome the amazing Josh and Phoebe.
26:32Today, for your amazement,
26:34the very good Phoebe will jump through a hoop.
26:38For our first trick, we will remove the leash from the dog
26:42and the dog will not go back to its owner.
26:46LAUGHTER
26:49Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
27:08Yes!
27:10Phoebe.
27:12APPLAUSE
27:16So this is a job application...
27:19..featuring footage of you doing that job poorly.
27:23Yeah.
27:25We did spend probably 24 minutes
27:27teaching Phoebe to jump through a hoop
27:29and she jumped through hoops not on the show, though.
27:33Right.
27:34And I, you know, what I've always said,
27:36**** Phoebe.
27:39No, this is definitely the task I've been the saddest about.
27:44I really believed I was going to pick a dog,
27:47jump through a hoop, and we'd win a Logie.
27:50Well, if it makes you feel any better,
27:52I've got some secret footage of the dog saying that it likes you.
27:55LAUGHTER
27:57I absolutely love that.
27:59No, I love that.
28:01All right, well, I need to hand out some scores.
28:03You do.
28:04I think it's pretty easy. I think Anne's on one.
28:06Her application was her doing the job badly.
28:08Josh is on two. Same.
28:10I'm giving three points to Jenny because the head fell off.
28:13I'm going to give four points to Lloyd
28:15because I just like hearing him say here over and over again.
28:18LAUGHTER
28:19But five points to Will Anderson
28:21because the Will Anderson Sketch Show finally has a good sketch!
28:24CHEERING
28:26Finally!
28:27All right, keep the task coming, Lesser Tom.
28:30Well, you might not be calling me Lesser Tom for long
28:33because in this task I debut a brand-new nickname.
28:46Where is he? Where is the little fella?
28:49Into the caravan.
28:51Hello, Tom. Hi, Will.
28:53How are you? I'm OK.
28:55How are you? I'm well.
28:57I just did a coffee poo. How are you?
28:59Oh, thanks for telling me. Yeah.
29:04Throw something at Tom.
29:06You must announce your throw by yelling...
29:08Hey, fun boy. Hey, fun boy.
29:10Hey, fun boy. I like this already.
29:13If Tom catches your throw, you will be disqualified.
29:15If the Taskmaster deems your throw to be uncatchable,
29:18you will be disqualified.
29:20Most unco dropped from Tom wins!
29:22You have until the end of today's filming.
29:25Your time starts now.
29:27Man, this is like a fun task.
29:30Chucking stuff at me? I'm not going to hurt you.
29:32OK. I promise you, I will not hurt you.
29:34APPLAUSE
29:38I'm not going to call you fun boy, by the way.
29:41Were you wanting it to catch on?
29:43If it didn't kill you.
29:45All right, fun boy, who are we going to watch?
29:48APPLAUSE
29:51They're my joint favourite contestants for this season.
29:54It's Anne, Jenny, Josh, Lloyd and Will.
29:57Your time starts now.
29:59But I must announce my throw by yelling...
30:02Hey, fun boy. Hey, fun boy!
30:04Is that...? Is that it?
30:06Oh, wait, did I only get one?
30:08Yeah. Oh, no!
30:12Hey.
30:14Hi, Josh.
30:16Fun guy.
30:20Hello. Hi, Anne.
30:22How are you? I'm OK.
30:24Hey, fun boy.
30:26Ah.
30:28Right, what's happening with you? Oh, OK.
30:30When the time was up, I sat up, I saw you immediately
30:34and I took this beautiful photo.
30:36Hey, fun boy.
30:40All right, I'm going to be back.
30:45Hey, fun boy.
30:47APPLAUSE
30:49Good.
30:51Do you think that was uncatchable? It was quite aggressive.
30:54Hey, fun boy.
30:56Yeah.
30:58I think it was catchable. You think that was catchable?
31:01Fun guy.
31:03You almost got it.
31:05I got a hand on it.
31:07Hey, fun boy.
31:09Sorry, Tom.
31:11That's OK. I apologise for that.
31:13Hey, fun boy.
31:17LAUGHTER
31:19APPLAUSE
31:26Brutal for me, this one.
31:28This one had the potential for me to make some classic catches in.
31:32And I made zero catches.
31:35All right, well, I have to rank them, don't I,
31:37in terms of how uncoordinated they make you look? Yep.
31:41Well, I'll give Anne one point because it just flew straight past you
31:44and you didn't even react to it, so you just looked like you missed it.
31:48And same goes for Jenny.
31:50It was sort of so quick, it just sort of flung in front of you
31:53and you just didn't even react.
31:55And then I want to give Josh three, but I can't
31:57because he didn't say, hey, fun boy. He didn't say Anne.
32:00Yeah, so Josh is disqualified.
32:03No, it's fair. I didn't say it.
32:05I don't get why people keep feeling sorry for you
32:08when you lose points because you don't follow the rules.
32:12But I can't quite decide.
32:14I think that Lloyd and Will both made you look pretty unco, beautifully.
32:18Do we have a side-by-side? Will made him look more unco.
32:20You reckon? Absolutely, yeah.
32:22OK, shall we have a little look? Mmm.
32:24Hey, fun boy.
32:28Hey, fun boy.
32:32All right. That's easy.
32:35Four points to Lloyd, five points to Will.
32:38All right.
32:42OK, time for me to be a less than fun boy
32:45and let you know that it's ad time.
32:47See you soon with more season finale madness after this.
32:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
33:01Welcome back to the Taskmaster Grand Final.
33:04We're not far away from finding out who will walk away
33:07with shorts that are far too fancy for Lloyd Langford.
33:10Tom Cashman, do you have another task for us?
33:13Yes, and I'm sad to announce
33:15this is the last proper task of the season.
33:17As this is the last time our contestants will see
33:19any action on the field,
33:21I thought we should all see some collaboration.
33:37Hey, Tom. Hi, Will.
33:39Villain. Ooh, hero.
33:42Hello, Tom. Whoa.
33:44Hi, Josh.
33:47Collaborate on a short action film.
33:49Ooh! This is so exciting!
33:53The action film must have a script.
33:55A hero. A villain.
33:57Music and sound effects.
33:59Your job on the action film is written on your chair.
34:02Best contribution to the action film wins.
34:05You have 45 minutes.
34:07Your time starts now.
34:10Sound effects. Oh, my God, I'm the hero!
34:12Villain. Composer.
34:14Scriptwriter.
34:16I'm really into, like, old kind of kung fu-type films.
34:19Do you have a script? Would you like a script?
34:21It seems useful.
34:22It's an original by Lloyd Langford. No!
34:26You haven't even read it yet.
34:28I just don't know.
34:30Lloyd's going to come up with something underwhelming.
34:34Jimmy and Timmy Wolfe were two of the best scouts
34:37in the Shaolin Scout Troop.
34:38Did Lloyd write this? I can tell.
34:41The more I read the script, the less I sort of understand.
34:44But the troop leader, Master Keith Snake,
34:46was always pushing them to the limit.
34:48And this is very Keith.
34:50Keith Snake disappears in a puff of smoke.
34:53I feel like I'm going to have to do a training montage.
35:00Jimmy whittles. Whittles?
35:02Yeah, like, carves bits of wood.
35:06Jimmy uses his scout skills to fight these punks.
35:10They try to kick him, but he furiously shines their shoes.
35:15Did someone say something about a voice-alterer?
35:18Ah! Ah!
35:22Punches. Kicks. Headbutts.
35:28Bit of ear nibbling.
35:31Jimmy grabs a towel off the bar,
35:33wraps it around Keith's neck in a knot.
35:39Tightens it and kills him. And that's the end.
35:41What's this film called?
35:43I was thinking of calling it Unholy Fists of the Very Aggrieved Scout.
35:47Because I only have a small part, I've got to go big.
35:50OK.
35:51Alright, well, I think let's get into it.
35:53I can't wait to see my vision brought to life.
36:02OK, so I think we really want to see how this all came together.
36:06What am I looking out for?
36:08You're looking out for the best contribution to the short film.
36:10The best contribution. OK.
36:12And they're coming at it from all angles.
36:15Alright, let's have a look.
36:16This is the Unholy Fists of the Very Aggrieved Scout.
36:26Jimmy and Timmy Wolf were two of the best scouts
36:29in the Shaolin Scout Troop,
36:31but the troop leader, Master Keith Snake,
36:34was always pushing them to the limit.
36:36I'm not sure I can tie this knot, Jimmy.
36:38If you can't do it, that's OK, brother.
36:40You're a law dog, you have to tie the knot yourself
36:44or you will not get your knot badge.
36:51Do something! He will surely perish!
36:53I cannot get involved.
36:55Let the test masters assist, don't I?
36:59I am but a neutral observer.
37:03Oh!
37:09Avenge me, brother, and maybe try for a badge other than knots.
37:23So, what are you looking for in a partner?
37:26I am not looking for a partner.
37:28I am looking for an evil scout leader
37:31whose callous behaviour allowed my brother to die painfully.
37:35And I will avenge him.
37:53Boing!
37:54Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
37:56Ha!
37:59Oh, I wish you'd put that in your bio.
38:01Hey, mate, we don't like guys coming in here
38:04and misrepresenting themselves in their dating bios.
38:07What are you going to do about it?
38:09We're going to kick your puny ass.
38:11Scout honour prohibits violence,
38:14but these shitheads are going to get a good punch in.
38:18Ha!
38:20Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
38:22Ha!
38:23啦...
38:23ha, ha, ha, ha, ooh, ha, ha!
38:26Ow!
38:26Oooh!
38:27Ha!
38:28Ha!
38:29Haaaa!
38:33Haaa!
38:34Haaaaaa!
38:38Awh, that was painful...
38:40Haa!
38:40Ha!
38:41Ha!
38:41Haa!
38:42Haa!
38:43Haa!
38:43Haa!
38:44Ha!
38:44Haaa!
38:45Haa!
38:45Haa!
38:46Haaaa!
38:47Haaaa!
38:48Haaaa!
38:49Ha ha!
38:50Ha ha!
38:51Ha ha!
38:51Ha ha!
38:52What is with all this commotion?
38:58Who is this man with the shiny shoes?
39:12I have hunted for you for two decades.
39:14I have earned every scout badge but one.
39:17You killed my brother. I am here to avenge his death.
39:20I will kill you and dance on your grave and piss on your bones.
39:24My ears are useless for listening.
39:54I think we finally deserve this.
40:06Maybe we should go on a second date.
40:10Two little twins in the middle of the night.
40:13A long, big sneeze, looking for a fight.
40:16He killed his brother, their poor mother.
40:19I can hear her screaming.
40:24Screaming.
40:27She's screaming.
40:30She's screaming.
40:33Unholy piss on the very aggravated scout.
40:38Unholy piss on the very aggravated scout, scout, scout, scout, scout.
40:49I think we've found another recurring character for the Will Anderson sketch show.
41:02You know what the best thing about it is?
41:04I refuse to get out of character all day.
41:08Real method, we only talk to the crew in that accent that we just go through.
41:13It was a good, fun day.
41:16Well, you've all made a great film, but I'm capable of creating drama and tension myself.
41:20I'm going to tell you who won that one after the ad break.
41:23See you soon.
41:35Welcome back to Taskmaster Australia.
41:37Right now we're having a filmmaking award ceremony.
41:40Yeah, the shitty Oscars.
41:43Also known as the Shoskers.
41:46Also known as the Logies.
41:50That's right, we just saw the world premiere of The Unholy Fists of the Very Aggrieved Scout,
41:54produced by these five right here.
41:56Yeah, and I've got to pick the most outstanding contribution,
41:58but I feel like I didn't see enough of Anne and Josh,
42:01because they're a bit more behind the scenes.
42:03Totally.
42:04So let's have a peek behind the scenes and maybe see their work.
42:06Jimmy and Timmy Wolfe were two of the best scouts in the Shaolin Scout Troop.
42:19Boing.
42:20Not again, what's that?
42:22I will kill you and dance on your grave and piss on your bones.
42:26Ah!
42:28It's mostly punching noises.
42:35No, that's not too much.
42:47Okay.
42:48Thanks, Tracey.
42:49Thank you.
42:50Terrible movie written by Lloyd.
42:55Well, I guess I should come up with some scores.
42:57So I'm going to give one point to Lloyd, because the script was...
43:04Everyone else in the production complained about it.
43:08So one point to Lloyd.
43:09I'm giving two points for Will Anderson's recurring character
43:12that's coming up in his brand-new sketch show.
43:15I'm giving three points to Jenny for a wonderful performance.
43:19Held the whole thing together.
43:21Four points to Anne Edmonds for the original score.
43:23All that music was done by Anne.
43:26And five points for the beautiful sound effects of Josh Thomas.
43:30Let's have one last look at those episode scores
43:33before we wrap this thing up.
43:35Well, there's two points in it at the front,
43:37but Will has Anne slightly beaten with his score of 18 points
43:40for the episode.
43:46All right, contestants, I hate to see you go,
43:48but I love to watch you leave.
43:50So get up on that stage for one last live task.
44:00What's going on here, Lesser Tom?
44:02Contestants, please turn around.
44:05Mmm!
44:07Oh!
44:08LAUGHTER
44:10Oh!
44:12Why are you all making noises like you know?
44:15You don't know?
44:16Please read the task. I don't know.
44:18Build a marshmallow towel using the remaining marshmallows
44:21in the jar you've had in your green room
44:23since the start of the studio recording.
44:25LAUGHTER
44:31Paulus Tower wins. You have three minutes.
44:34Lloyd!
44:35Your time starts on Tom's whistle.
44:37LAUGHTER
44:39Did you like the marshmallows, Will?
44:41LAUGHTER
44:43I was going to take the rest home with me!
44:46LAUGHTER
44:48And I almost did that before we recorded this!
44:51LAUGHTER
44:53Lloyd, would you like to explain what's happened here?
44:57LAUGHTER
44:59I spoke to the director of the series
45:03and I said, I've got this giant jar of marshmallows in my room,
45:07I would like to replace them with a jar of fruit.
45:10LAUGHTER
45:13How long have we got? Three minutes.
45:15From...
45:16WHISTLE BLOWS
45:17CHEERING
45:19LAUGHTER
45:23CHEERING
45:29Did you ask for any specific fruit, Lloyd?
45:31All I can see here is Mandarin.
45:33LAUGHTER
45:36Two minutes left.
45:37Ah!
45:38LAUGHTER
45:4190 seconds.
45:42LAUGHTER
45:44Just pouring them out.
45:46I really thought it would balance.
45:4830 seconds left.
45:49CHEERING
45:51Oh, my God!
45:54Yeah, thank you.
45:55Ten seconds.
45:56Five, four, three, two, one.
46:01Hands off.
46:02WHISTLE BLOWS
46:03CHEERING
46:07Lloyd!
46:09Lloyd!
46:10This is so sad!
46:12Oh, wow, look at Lloyd!
46:13Wow.
46:14For all those kids watching at home, fruit is good for you.
46:17LAUGHTER
46:18CHEERING
46:20All right.
46:21We'll find out the winner of the live task after this.
46:24CHEERING
46:33Welcome back to an emotional final part
46:36of the final episode of Taskmaster Australia Season 2.
46:40We've got some winners to get to, Lesser Tom,
46:42so how do the scores look?
46:44First up was Anne, with 10.2cm.
46:47Josh got to 11.9cm.
46:49Will got 13.6.
46:51Jenny stacked 15.5.
46:53But on his healthy high horse, Lloyd got 33.5cm.
46:57CHEERING
47:01That means, for this episode,
47:03the winner is Will, with a total of 21 points.
47:06CHEERING
47:08Congratulations, Will.
47:09Go and get your valuable stuff that holds no value to Lloyd.
47:14So, what have we learnt from this episode?
47:16Hey, fun boy.
47:17Oh!
47:18LAUGHTER
47:20CHEERING
47:29Good on you, Will, for winning it!
47:32Give him a big hand!
47:34CHEERING
47:37CHEERING
47:42All right, we made it to the end.
47:44Some doubted us even more than Will's parents doubted him.
47:47But we did it.
47:49We survived, even after all the throwing, catching, hiding
47:53and shit-shovelling that was Season 2.
47:56I'm proud to say we have a winner.
47:59So, Lesser Tom, who is that winner?
48:02In a commendable fifth place, on 138 points,
48:05it's Josh Thomas.
48:07CHEERING
48:10In a slightly more commendable fourth place,
48:12on 142 points, it's Jenny Tian.
48:15CHEERING
48:18Then up in third, on 154 points, Will Anderson.
48:22CHEERING
48:26But overall, the winner is love,
48:29because, no joke, on 161 points,
48:32a tie between Anne and Lloyd.
48:35Oh, no!
48:37CHEERING
48:42This means we have a first on Taskmaster Australia.
48:46We have a season tie.
48:48Oh!
48:50What does it mean?
48:51Yes, what happens?
48:52We have a season tie breaker.
48:54So I'm going to give you both a pen and paper
48:56and then I'm going to ask you a question.
48:58You're going to have five seconds to write your answer
49:00and I'm going to give you a piece of paper
49:02and we're going to see who gets the closest.
49:04I can't write.
49:06Oh, it's B.
49:08Oh!
49:09This is for the season?
49:10One question for the season?
49:11That's right.
49:13I was expecting a giant piece of paper.
49:15LAUGHTER
49:17How much does the Taskmaster trophy weigh?
49:21Please write down your answers.
49:24WHISTLING
49:29OK.
49:31You finished?
49:33LAUGHTER
49:37Please hold up your answers.
49:39What does yours say, Lloyd?
49:413.6 kilograms.
49:43What does yours say, Anne?
49:447 kilograms.
49:46Let's look at the tape.
49:49No.
49:54LAUGHTER
49:571.621 kilograms.
50:00Which means Lloyd is the winner!
50:02CHEERING
50:05Well done, mate.
50:09Congratulations.
50:11You win my head.
50:13All right, truly ridiculous.
50:15Congratulations to Lloyd.
50:16Good night!
50:18APPLAUSE
50:24Let me feel it!
50:26LAUGHTER
50:45That's very nice.
50:47Hi, Tom.
50:49I think I'm having an aneurysm.
50:51Oh!
50:53There we go.
50:54F*** you!
50:59Oh, no! Tom!
51:00Come on!
51:01Bye!
51:02Oh, God!