Sometimes we confuse sadness with depression. Depression is an extreme case of sadness. What are the ways we can help overcome our depression in Islam?
Dr. Bilal Philips
Dr. Bilal Philips
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00:00The Islamic cure for depression.
00:25First and foremost, it is important for us to recognize how serious the illness known
00:39as depression is.
00:44Because sometimes we take it for granted and actually we mix it up with sadness.
01:01And there is a difference between, a quantitative difference between sadness and depression.
01:13Now depression involves sadness, but it is sadness to an extreme level.
01:23And according to the clinical definitions of depression, it involves particular symptoms,
01:32you know, which are identifiable, they have been listed.
01:40And you know, one before saying, you know, I'm in a state of depression, they should
01:48really look at this list and confirm whether what they are talking about is actually depression
01:56or not.
02:00It is the fourth leading cause of death in the U.S. through suicides, 75% of suicides
02:17are a result of depression.
02:21And the country with the highest rate of suicide is New Zealand.
02:30Yeah, New Zealand.
02:34I mean one would think why these people just sheep and you know, where does all this depression
02:39coming from?
02:41But they have the highest rate in the world.
02:47And it affects more people than cancer in the U.S. and you can extend that to the rest
02:57of the world.
02:58It's just these are the statistics that we have.
03:05And more than heart disease, the various diseases of the heart causing heart attacks, etc.
03:13There's about 17 million people in America who suffer from heart disease.
03:20Those who are suffering from depression are more.
03:24So we're dealing with something that can affect people on a level which is to us, to
03:38the normal person incomprehensible, difficult to understand.
03:45Whether it is a child coming to school, like in the Columbine massacres, a young boy coming
04:02to school because he got dumped by his girlfriend, he brings his father's gun collection with
04:09him to school and he starts mowing down his classmates, his teachers, principal.
04:18Or we have the case of Adolf Merkel, not related to the current president, who was the 94th
04:34richest person in the world in 2009.
04:40He was the 94th richest person in the world.
04:44He had a fortune of 8.5 billion dollars.
04:52And the depression or recession which took place at that period of time caused him to
05:01lose in his investments in Volkswagen, 400 million dollars in the space of a very short
05:14period of time, a month or so, he lost 400 million dollars.
05:19And he built his own industrial empire by himself from zero, worth 8.5 billion.
05:36What he did after realizing that, he went one morning to the train tracks, laid down
05:47on the train tracks and waited for the train to run over him, killed him, suicide.
05:58This is a man who still had 8.1 billion dollars.
06:10What happened here?
06:128.1 billion dollars, if a person lived until the age of 80, he would have to spend 280,000
06:26dollars every day of his life, from the time he was born till he hit 80 and died.
06:34Imagine that.
06:37And this man killed himself.
06:42So we're dealing with something, he was 74 years old at the time, so he wasn't a young
06:49person, he was still mentally, his faculties were all there.
06:59But when falling into this state of depression, then everything around him lost its value.
07:16He became unable to see good in anything.
07:23That's what takes people to the point where they feel life is not worth living anymore.
07:32And there is no clear treatment medically for depression.
07:44The psychologists who specialize in this area don't even know the cause.
07:53Some say it's hereditary, say they have identified two chemicals, serotonin and dopamine, as
08:07two chemicals that if a person is in a state of depression, the quantity goes down.
08:17When the quantity comes up, they are in a better state.
08:24Actually, what causes the quantity to come up is seen in various treatments that they
08:32give, etc.
08:36But Islam has provided for Muslims a means to deal with depression as a part and parcel
08:54of life.
08:57And this is not to say that where people are in states that can't be treated normally,
09:07we deny them access to trained psychologists who perhaps can help them.
09:19But Islam provides a theoretical basis as well as a practical basis for the treatment
09:31of depression.
09:36First and foremost, where people have set the goal in life, what is considered to be
09:47a good life, as a stress-free life, we need to understand that this is not possible.
10:03First and foremost, a stress-free life is no life.
10:14When you're dead, stress is gone in this life.
10:20As to the barzakh, that's a whole other story.
10:26But the point is that we are constantly encouraged through the motivational speakers and writers,
10:40etc., and given that carrot hanging on a stick that we run after, the stress-free life.
10:52Be happy.
10:55This is about it.
10:57No stress, naturally you're going to be happy.
11:01However, reality is that Allah told us, Allah said, I have created human beings in difficulty,
11:20struggle, stress.
11:25That's how he created us.
11:27And it's natural in our lives to have struggle.
11:34From the time we're born, if you observe a child coming into the world, from the safety
11:45of the womb into this world, it's a massive struggle.
11:52Children die in the process, mothers die in the process, it's a struggle.
11:59And then what the child goes through, growing, drinking milk, crying for food and milk, starting
12:11to walk, you see the children, the struggle that they have to go through to finally stand
12:16up and then take their first steps and they fall down.
12:22That is natural.
12:25Every child goes through that.
12:28And this is how Allah has created us.
12:32So human nature is basically one which is stressful.
12:43There's stress in it.
12:45There's stress in our lives.
12:48So the real challenge is not to live a stress free life, but to know how to handle stress
13:02in life.
13:05This is the challenge.
13:08Not to find a stress free life, find an island somewhere in the Pacific, coconut tree and
13:17you just lie there in the sand, tsunami is coming to wipe you out.
13:28This is not real life.
13:32This is what is sold to us in the media.
13:38If you have enough money, you can do that.
13:44And what you have to do to get that money is so stressful, most of us never make it.
13:55So the challenge for us is to manage stress in such a way that it doesn't lead to depression.
14:17We can't escape it.
14:19But we have principles in Islam which teach us how to manage it.
14:31First and foremost, we have an outlook on life.
14:40Life which we said is stressful, it has its ups and its downs.
14:45Times when you're happy, times when you're sad.
14:47Times when good things are coming, times when bad things are coming.
14:50That's just how life is.
14:54So the Prophet s.a.w. gave us a basic principle on how to deal with the ups and the downs
15:02of life.
15:03So this is a concept which we can apply.
15:10He told us that the affair of the believer is amazing and it's only in the case of the
15:19believer.
15:21Whenever good comes to him or her, he or she is grateful to Allah and Allah rewards them
15:31for it.
15:33And whenever bad comes, they're patient and Allah rewards them for it.
15:43So we have the principle of gratitude and patience.
15:53That if we are able to handle the ups and downs of life with those two principles, then
16:02we're not going to be overwhelmed by stress.
16:07Because our lives are either up, we're successful, we got a raise, our business made its first
16:15million, whatever.
16:22Or the business failed, customers left, partner broke the contract, ran away with all the
16:34money.
16:36All these things are happening.
16:39It's one or the other.
16:41So if you're able to deal with it by understanding these principles, then a great portion of
16:51stress will be managed in your life.
16:56It doesn't mean you don't get sad.
16:59Sure you'll be sad when things didn't go right, didn't go the way you expected them to go
17:03or you wanted them to go.
17:07But you won't be overwhelmed by that sadness.
17:14And when things go well, you're successful, then you are grateful to Allah.
17:24You don't allow that success to go to your head.
17:29When it goes to your head, people think, I did it.
17:36When people are successful, you see them just jumping and screaming, success.
17:45But in that state, they forget Allah.
17:51So it became I, I did it.
17:56I'm the best.
17:58I'm the one.
18:03Remember Muhammad Ali used to say what?
18:05I'm the greatest.
18:10When I met him in Riyadh, Alzheimer's had already set in and he had difficulty speaking,
18:21but slowly he could speak.
18:23He said to me, you know, the best thing that ever happened to me was Alzheimer's.
18:34If that hadn't happened to me, I would have gone to my grave thinking I was the greatest,
18:41which is shirk.
18:45Allah humbled me.
18:49I was not the greatest.
18:52He humbled me.
18:55So at that time, he told me that he used to do the dawah by preparing brochures on Islam
19:16the night before any events that he was invited to.
19:20Of course, these events are usually filled with non-Muslims.
19:25So he would spend the night before or two days before just signing these brochures,
19:33which were explaining what is Islam, what is prayer in Islam, fasting in Islam, whatever.
19:44He would sign very slowly, maybe it would take him five minutes for every brochure.
19:50But he would just take his time and sign them.
19:54Because he knew that these, at the end of his event, these would be distributed, they
20:03would be given, signed brochures by Muhammad Ali.
20:09People would treasure that.
20:12Maybe they weren't interested in Islam, mostly they weren't.
20:17But still they would take the brochure home with his signature, and maybe they might say,
20:23what is this about anyway, and start to read it.
20:30He kept doing that dawah until he died.
20:36May Allah bless him, give him paradise, forgive his sins.
20:43The Prophet ﷺ also gave us du'a, and we know that du'a is of a special place,
21:04having a special place in Islam.
21:09The Prophet ﷺ stressed it to such a degree that he said, the only thing that can change
21:14qadr is du'a.
21:19Du'a being individual prayer.
21:27Because usually du'a translated as prayer, people think salah.
21:33So salah, du'a, we know there's a distinction between it.
21:37Salah includes du'a, but du'a does not include salah.
21:48So he told us a du'a to make, which again, people who are struggling with stress, etc.,
21:59should learn,
22:02اللهم إني أعوذ بك من الحم والحزن
22:07O Allah, I seek refuge in you from worry and depression.
22:14From worry and depression.
22:24This is something for those of us that feel depressed or feel that they're unable to handle
22:34their situation, that they should learn this du'a.
22:41You may say it in English, or Bahasa, or Arabic, it's nice to say it in Arabic, help you to
22:53learn a little bit more Arabic, to understand it, to understand what it means, but not to
22:59say it without knowing what you're saying.
23:08We also have another du'a, which was the du'a of Prophet Yunus, Jonah in English, Dhun-Nun,
23:27title given to him also, where his people rejected him, rejected the message of Islam
23:36that he brought, which is the sunnah of the people of all of the prophets.
23:42Whenever the prophets came, the people rejected them, virtually without exception, as far
23:50as we know.
23:54But eventually, they would win the people over.
23:58In the case of Yunus, Prophet Yunus, his people rejected him continually, till he gave
24:07up hope, and he abandoned them, says it's just totally useless, no point.
24:17So he tried to get away from where he was, he went on the sea, he got caught in a storm,
24:25everybody knows the story, fell out, swallowed by a sea creature, we don't know if it's a
24:34whale, a big fish, a shark, mega, or whatever, we don't know.
24:43The point is that a sea creature swallowed him, and Allah subhana wa ta'ala protected
24:51him from being digested.
24:55Because what happens when you get in the stomach of an animal, they're gonna digest you, digestive
25:01juices will be all over you and you're dissolved and absorbed.
25:08So Allah prevented him from being digested, and in the belly of that creature, he made
25:17dua, la ilaha illa ant, subhanaka inni kuntu minaz zalimin.
25:30This dua, Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. said, which means, there's no God worthy of worship but
25:38you, may you be glorified.
25:42I was and am among the sinful, he repented for the sin, mistake, error that he did by
25:59leaving the command that Allah had given him to his people to go and carry the message
26:09to his people.
26:13So the Prophet s.a.w. had said, Allah will relieve the distress and depression of anyone
26:20who makes the prayer of my brother Yunus.
26:26That's the promise of the Prophet s.a.w.
26:31So again, it's another dua, which we should take benefit from to help us in dealing with
26:42the depression.
26:47And with regards to that incident with Prophet Yunus, there are four basic lessons that
27:01we should take from it.
27:04One, the need for patience in all of our affairs.
27:14We talked about the principles of the ups and the downs, Prophet s.a.w. gave us that
27:20principle to be grateful when things are good and to be patient when things are bad.
27:31Now most people are impatient.
27:39Impatient beings were created hasty by nature, who want to do things right now, now, immediately.
27:52Impatient, it's our nature.
27:56So those people that have been born by Allah's Qadr, having patience, from an early age they
28:10are known for their patience, they are few and far between.
28:17And they have been blessed especially.
28:20But the vast majority of us are impatient.
28:25That's the rest of us, impatient.
28:30So if Allah made the majority of us impatient, and he wants us to be patient, then it must
28:42mean that it is possible for us to become patient even though we are by nature, by our
28:52genetic makeup, impatient.
28:58So Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. being the final messenger of Allah s.w.t to humankind, he
29:09didn't leave this world without telling us the formula for learning patience.
29:19He told us,
29:22وَمَن يَتَصَبَّرْ يُصَبِّرْهُ اللَّهُ
29:27Whoever pretends to be patient, continually, Allah will give him or her patience.
29:40Whoever pretends, meaning, you are in a stressful situation, whatever, you are impatient, but
29:47you hold yourself back and you pretend to be patient.
29:55Inside you are not, but on the outside, people say, look how patient s.w.t is, inside you
30:02are not, you are just fighting it.
30:06That if you keep doing that, eventually it will become your nature.
30:16This is what the Prophet s.a.w. told us.
30:21It's just like people who are angry, actually it's a general principle that you can apply
30:27to all of these characteristics.
30:29People who are angry, people just say, that's how I am, I can't help it.
30:35They just flare up, but it is possible.
30:40If they use that same principle, that when they feel that they are going to explode,
30:45they hold themselves back.
30:50Inside they are exploding, but externally, if he keeps or she keeps doing that, eventually
31:03they will overcome anger.
31:05It's possible.
31:08Because Allah is not going to give you a characteristic that you cannot overcome and then punish you
31:18for that characteristic.
31:21That doesn't make sense, that's unfair.
31:26So all of those higher noble characteristics, which as Muslims, we should invite others
31:38to and we should ourselves practice, all of these characteristics are attainable.
31:46We don't have to say, no it's only the Prophets, only the saintly people, special people, no.
31:56Even the most common of people, it's possible.
32:05You know, in the time of the Prophet, there was one companion, who nobody knew as a notable
32:23person, there is even doubt about exactly what his name was, but on one occasion when
32:35the Prophet was sitting in a circle with his companions and he walked in the masjid, just
32:44before he walked in, the Prophet said to all of the companions there, the next person who
32:52walks into the masjid will be from the people of paradise.
32:59So they all looked to see who was coming in and in walked this companion.
33:06In the narration his name is not even mentioned.
33:09He walked in, carrying his shoes in his hand, sandals, water was dripping from his beard.
33:21He prayed two rakaat and sat down with the Prophet, but nobody looked at him, mashallah, mashallah.
33:30The next day, in the circle with the Prophet, a time came and he said the same thing, the
33:41next man who comes inside of the masjid will be from the people of paradise, they are looking
33:47again and walks the same sahabi, puts his sandals down, prays and comes and sits with
33:57the Prophet, it's not Abu Bakr, it's not Umar, it's Uthman Ali.
34:09Third time he came, the Prophet said the same thing, he walked again.
34:19One of the companions, Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-As, he said, I decided to find out what
34:31it is about this man.
34:34What was so special about him that the Prophet would designate him among the people of paradise,
34:41only a few people, who in his time, in his lifetime, he said these people will be of
34:47the people of paradise.
34:55So he went to the man, he said, listen, after the circle, he was leaving, he came to the
35:01man, he said, listen, I got into an argument with my father, and so I need to leave the
35:11house, so can I spend a couple of days with you, nights, sleep over at your place?
35:18He said, sure.
35:20He brought him.
35:23So nighttime, time to sleep, came, he's waiting to see, you know, is this guy going to get
35:33up for tahajjud?
35:36He waits, middle of the night, fajr, no tahajjud, maybe he's going to make suhoor, no suhoor.
35:50He prayed his fajr, and you know, the masjid, everybody, second day, same thing.
35:59Third day, same thing, oh no, he's frustrated, what is this, there's nothing special about
36:07this guy, why in the world should he be among the people, you know, designated to be among
36:11the people of paradise?
36:13So he told him, he said, listen, actually, I didn't have any argument with my father,
36:21I just wanted to see what it was, he said, what you saw is what it is, I do what you
36:32saw me do, I sleep at night, get up in the morning, fajr, suhoor, nothing, not necessarily
36:38tahajjud, sometimes, fajr sometimes, he said, why is that, he said, well, there's only one
36:48thing I could say, before I go to bed at night, I make sure that there's no rancor in my heart
36:56for anyone.
36:57So, I'm going to ask, I'm going to say, ah, that's it, that's the one that's so difficult
37:05for everybody, that quality, and nobody, quote unquote, so to speak, from among the sahaba,
37:16that quality distinguished him from everybody else.
37:23So it is attainable by everyone.
37:30The deen, the peak, the pinnacles, is attainable by everyone.
37:37It only requires us to practice Islam.
37:45The second lesson from the story of Yunus, is to acknowledge our mistakes to Allah, and
37:58to those around us.
38:02If we don't acknowledge our mistakes, we can't correct them, we can't change them.
38:10The third is repentance, immediately, it's what he did, and the fourth
38:36is to glorify Allah throughout our day, to glorify Allah.
38:46Not just as a ritual, subhanAllah, we repeat it culturally, many times, after each prayer,
39:01but not reflecting in our glorification of Allah.
39:09Because without reflection, it is useless.
39:15It's just a sound, subhanAllah, people say, subhanAllah, subhanAllah, remember that?
39:23Hey, subhanAllah is far different from subhanAllah.
39:34To be serious, in that sense.
39:40So from Prophet Yunus, we learn those principles, all of which create a personality capable
39:58of dealing with stress, handling stress, not escaping it, but handling it.
40:11Sadness, we have the book, which was translated into English, it's Don't Be Sad, la tahzan.
40:24When the Prophet and Abu Bakr were in the cave on the way to Medina, Abu Bakr got scared,
40:35Quraysh were close, he said, la tahzan, inna Allah ma'ana.
40:41This is translated as don't be sad, actually, that's not the correct translation, though
40:49everybody knows it as that, etc.
40:52It's not don't be sad, because Prophet Muhammad was sad.
40:57When his son died, in Medina, when his son died, tears came down his cheek, he was sad.
41:07We have, by our nature, times when we are sad, and we will feel sad.
41:14So to say don't be sad, no, don't be depressed, that is the better translation, don't be depressed.
41:27Don't be overwhelmed by sadness, where you reach what they call clinical depression,
41:43where you're overwhelmed by feelings of helplessness and hopelessness.
41:48You're helpless, nobody can help you, it's hopeless, you've lost all hope.
41:54These are among the key principles to know.
42:02Loss of interest in daily activities, your hobbies, your social activities.
42:11You don't get enjoyment and pleasure from them anymore.
42:19Your appetite is affected, either you gain weight, you balloon, or you lose weight, you
42:27become a skeleton, you know, one or the other.
42:29These are the extremes, both are symptoms of the true depression.
42:39You become finding difficulty at night to sleep, insomnia, one of the signs, you can't
42:50sleep at night, depression takes you to that point, or you go to the other extreme, they
42:57call it hypersomnia, you're sleeping all the time, can't get out of the bed, you know.
43:05These are the extremes, right?
43:08And you become irritable, you get angry very easily, you have a low tolerance for anybody
43:14to say it, do, you look at me, why are you looking at me like that?
43:22And then loss of energy, you don't seem to have the energy to do anything.
43:31You become fatigued, sluggish, you just want to find a corner and die, that's it.
43:44So these are the signs of real depression.
43:54So Islam offers a number of solutions, we've talked about some in general in theory, but
44:06among them is fasting, Mondays and Thursdays, fasting.
44:13Where is fasting from depression?
44:19Well, when you're depressed, you feel a loss of control, like your life is just spinning
44:30out, falling down, there's no way to stop things from happening, you've lost control
44:39of your life.
44:41People are depressed is a common expression that they say, I don't feel I have control
44:46of my life anymore.
44:49My life is just spinning out of control.
44:53What fasting does, it gives you control.
44:58What is fasting but control?
45:01Isn't it?
45:03The essence of fasting is control.
45:07So you control the time when you eat your suhoor, you control the time when you break
45:16your fast, your iftar, that gives you a sense of taking hold of your life.
45:25You've got it under control, that can help.
45:31Demonstrating gratitude through sujud ash-shukr, I talked about it before when I visited you
45:38guys.
45:39That's one very important way, because gratitude through sujud ash-shukr, where you prostrate
45:51without necessarily having wudu, doesn't have to be in the direction of the qibla, you just
45:58go into prostration, especially when something good happens in your life, that's the norm.
46:04For people who are already depressed, then they need to go and prostrate and find the
46:09good things in their lives.
46:11Go down and prostrate and think about, stay down there till you can remember something
46:18good in your life.
46:21That very day, or yesterday, you can't find anything today, but actually every day there's
46:25something.
46:27But you stay down there until it comes to your mind.
46:32And every day you go ahead and you do sujud ash-shukr, remembering other things which
46:38were good.
46:41And you keep doing that day after day after day, eventually your outlook will change.
46:49Because where you thought there was no good, because this is the problem, when you feel
46:54there's no good in your life, when in reality there is plenty of good.
46:59There are always people far worse off than we are.
47:04So you just need to reconnect with the good that is in your life.
47:09So when you have that consciousness of the good, then that can start to change your whole
47:17mentality, your expression, your energy, all of that can start to change.
47:29And of course, our dua, the two duas we mentioned, and others, and we also have belief in Qadr,
47:43the sixth pillar of Iman, reflecting on it as the Prophet s.a.w. had told us that 50,000
47:53years before this world was created, Allah instructed a writing instrument to write.
48:02And it asked Allah what should it write, and Allah told it to write everything that was
48:10and would be.
48:12So whatever has happened to our lives and in our lives, it was already written, already
48:21there.
48:23It's just for us to handle it, the good of it, and the relative evil of it.
48:33As Prophet s.a.w. said, belief in the Qadr, it's good, the good of it, and evil.
48:42But the evil is relative to us, because Allah is not evil.
48:52Whatever Allah has created is good.
48:56It is us who end up in evil by violating the rules, disobeying, disbelieving, etc.
49:11So coming to grips with Qadr is also important mentally to help us deal with depression.
49:30So Islam, as we said in the beginning, provided already a foundation for us to deal with depression.
49:48If we are implementing the teachings of Islam in our lives properly, then we shouldn't fall
50:00into full-scale depression, becoming sad at different times, maybe depressed occasionally,
50:11but not a state of continual depression.
50:15That is only going to happen when one is not following the teachings.
50:24Many times when people get depressed, they give up Salah, they don't realize that that's
50:29just making it worse.
50:32Instead of trying to make your Salah better, because there is in Salah, cure, purification,
50:42repentance, all those elements are there that can make us better human beings.
50:52Consciousness of Allah makes us understand the world around us correctly.
50:59All of the good that is there, we lose when we abandon prayer, etc.
51:06So Alhamdulillah, Allah has blessed us to be Muslims.
51:16For those of us who converted to find Islam, from those of us who reverted from having
51:27left Islam, reverted back, there are a lot of those out there too, Alhamdulillah, we
51:36thank Allah, that Allah has blessed us with the greatest possible blessing that a human
51:44being could have, and that is Islam.
51:49And through it, through knowing it properly, studying it, practicing it, and teaching it,
52:05we have a complete comprehensive system of life which will protect us from most of the
52:16problems that general society faces, and that is why till today, in spite of where Muslims
52:30have gone away from the teachings, there is still enough energy there to protect the Ummah
52:41from much of the psychological, mental issues that exist in the first world, in the developed
52:56world, where we have a situation like New Zealand, Japan is way up there too, you know,
53:08suicide, massive, they may be number three or number two.
53:14So Alhamdulillah, we thank Allah for the blessing of Islam and we ask Allah to allow us to leave
53:24this world as Muslims, firmly practicing his religion, Ameen.
53:54Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah.