Taskmaster Australia S03E02
Taskmaster Australia S03E02
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00:00No!
00:02No!
00:04Ah!
00:06Oh!
00:08Ah!
00:10No!
00:12No!
00:14We've made it!
00:17Whoa!
00:27Is this good television?
00:38Hello and welcome to Taskmaster Australia.
00:41I may be Tom Gleeson by day
00:43but by night across ten weeks of the calendar year
00:46I take on another title.
00:48A title that in a single word
00:50may answer some of humanity's deepest questions like
00:53Why do we exist?
00:55For whom do we toil?
00:57And why have I found myself watching commercial television again?
01:02That three-syllable title is of course
01:04The Taskmaster!
01:09This season our five comedians are
01:11Aaron Chen
01:13Conchetta Caristo
01:15Hal Buddle
01:17Peter Hellyer
01:19and Rhys Nicholson
01:23And finally, the other one sitting here
01:26he has a presence that gives me chills
01:28even before he enters the room
01:30and crows always squawk at him
01:32it's my assistant Tom Cashman
01:38How are you, weirdo?
01:40Oh, I'm okay
01:43I've been privy to some celebrity gossip recently
01:46Oh
01:47Okay
01:48I know how Rebel Wilson got her name
01:50Her last name was named after the volleyball in Cast Away
01:55And her first name, that's from the shop where the volleyball was purchased
02:03So in your act, is that material?
02:06Look, I'll be honest, I have done it on stage before
02:10Yeah, I had a feeling
02:11Don't drag your old shit in here again
02:17Alright, what's up first?
02:18Well, our first task is a prize task
02:20Each contestant has brought in a prize
02:22and the winner of tonight's episode will take home all five prizes
02:25Tonight, our contestants have been asked to bring in
02:27what they consider to be the cheekiest thing in a box
02:31Cheeky Rhys, what have you brought in?
02:33I've brought a few kilos of premium beef cheek
02:40Okay, very literal definition there
02:42Yeah, not too many jokes
02:43It's just a bit of a meat raffle happening down here at Taskmaster
02:46Bring the truck, bring the trailer, kids get in free
02:50I grew up in Newcastle
02:53You know what you've accidentally done there?
02:55Is you've brought in something that's useful
02:57Can you say that in my dad's voice, please?
03:03Alright, Mel, what did you bring in?
03:05I've brought in a thing called a pup in a cup
03:08So I've slightly pulled the literal definition of box
03:14That's eye-catching
03:17It's a children's toy, Rhys
03:19Thank you
03:20Okay, I think Rhys thinks it's some other toy
03:24No, it pops up
03:25So you squeeze the cup and the...
03:28Yay!
03:32Okay, not bad
03:33Aaron?
03:34I bought the Mr Bean boxer
03:39Now this guy's so cheeky
03:42One time he put a turkey on his head
03:48And most people like to drive cars
03:51Sitting inside the car
03:54But this guy, he drove it sitting on top of it
03:59Aaron, what are some other things Mr Bean's done?
04:03If you think he's not cheeky, then listen to this
04:07One time Mr Bean damaged an extremely expensive painting
04:13And he replaced it with a print
04:18Concetta, what did you bring in?
04:20I brought in the cheekiest guy
04:22Get a load of this guy
04:29I think you've mistaken cheekiness with pervertedness
04:34Alright, Peter, what did you bring in that's cheeky?
04:37Well, mine was not dissimilar to what we just saw
04:40But I think it is cheekier
04:43It is the Dalai Lama taking a dump
04:52A little cheeky dump
04:54I found this on my travels in Barcelona
04:56Right
04:57I thought I had no profile in Spain
05:00But there was a Peter Hellyer one in the shop in Barcelona
05:08It's pretty cheeky of them to be making money off my name
05:11I mean, I've never worn that, I don't wear glasses
05:14But it's definitely me
05:18I think that might be Elton John
05:21Oh yeah, I see that now
05:24Can I bring something to your attention?
05:26Yes
05:27There are a few people in the middle here
05:29None of their prizes are in boxes
05:31Right, well, Mel did say she just stretched the definition of box to cup
05:35Yes, because it's in a thing
05:37And is that thing a box?
05:38I don't know how to say it, I'm not a box doctor
05:40Or am I?
05:42Alright, well, I'd better score this
05:44Knowing that three aren't in a box is very persuasive
05:47That they should at least be the bottom three
05:49So I'm going to say Pete gets one point
05:51Concetta on two
05:52Mel's item, even though it wasn't in a box, did look genuinely cheeky
05:55Of all the items that we had, I think Mel's was the cheekiest
05:58Three points to Mel
05:59Rhys on four points
06:00Because beef cheeks, you can just cook them up and eat them
06:02It's quite useful
06:03But Aaron gets five points
06:06Alright, time for a task, I think
06:08This task involves something I've been searching for my whole life
06:11A team
06:12It's our first team task for the season
06:26Hi Tom
06:28Oh, I don't think you're ready for all this jelly
06:35Hey Tom
06:36Hi Pete
06:37You look good
06:38I feel good
06:39Oh my God!
06:41G'day mate
06:42I'm going to cry
06:46We've come dressed alike, again
06:49Should we catch up?
06:50Tom, can you give us a moment?
06:52Simon?
06:53Yeah, can you get us a couple of mimosas, Tom?
06:55Let's girl talk
06:56Tom, listen
06:57Is he mean to you?
06:58Yes!
06:59Yeah, no
07:00And he's annoying
07:05Good to see you, Pete
07:06Good to see you
07:07What have you been up to?
07:08Just hanging out with my balls
07:11Let's read it together
07:12Wearing your exercise ball vest
07:15I guess that's these
07:16Yep
07:17Collect the seven odd shapes from around the Tasmos territory
07:21and stack them into a perfectly square tower on the oblong
07:25You may not tamper with or remove your exercise ball vest
07:28Also, one of you must whisper an original supportive sentence
07:33in the ear of a teammate every 30 seconds
07:38Fastest wins
07:39Oh my God, are we going to go?
07:40Are you listening?
07:41Yes
07:42Sorry
07:43Your time starts now
07:45Thank you
07:46Let's all go together and find a round of retreat
07:48You look like hemorrhoids
07:49Let's go
07:55I love the team task, very exciting
07:57I'll have to think of names for the teams too
07:59That would be good
08:00So, just to be clear, the game is basically hide and seek plus Tetris
08:05if you're pregnant with four babies
08:08And the team of three must whisper an original supportive sentence
08:11every 30 seconds
08:12The other team don't have to do that
08:13What the hell?
08:14Just to make it slightly more difficult
08:15You have an unfair advantage, there's three of you
08:17Yeah, but it's so hard to think of nice things to say to these guys
08:22Alright, so which team is going to start us off?
08:24Making their debut with their debutante balls, it's Conchetta and Mel
08:28I see one
08:30Oh my God, Mel!
08:33Mel, they're huge
08:35I got one too
08:36Okay, I'm going to keep going in
08:42Ah, another one
08:44Brilliant
08:45Got another one
08:47Here's one
08:48There's one right here
08:49Okay, I grab that, you go to the shed
08:50Thank you
08:52Now, how do I do this?
08:55I got one
08:56Oh babe
08:58Babe, this is where the challenge really begins
09:00Okay, so we've got to be smart
09:03Perhaps these shouldn't be together, 69ing
09:06The yellows on this
09:08Yeah, that's looking hot
09:10You can mount that one
09:11Just wanted to hang out with my friend today
09:13But I guess we'll just do this shit for your pleasure
09:18I think we're close
09:20And I didn't realise what a burden having four testicles would be
09:23There you go, perfect square, done
09:26We're so close
09:28We're smart, funny women now
09:31With beautiful hair
09:33We do have good hair
09:34We need to get this
09:35What about like, should the yellows be together and then like flat, flat
09:41Oh, this is, how long have we been going?
09:4415 minutes and 51 seconds
09:46We have to start again
09:48No, I'm not starting again
09:49But we won't, he'll keep us here forever until we do it
09:52No, we will not die here, we'll not be at our 80th birthday going
09:55I think we could probably make it work
09:58Do you think you could potentially, after 15 minutes of trying something, not be focusing on dying here?
10:03It would get me out of finishing this f***ing thing
10:06We had to move one thing
10:08It all works perfectly until blue and yellow
10:11What if they were swapped around?
10:13You beautiful bitch
10:14Like what if they were like better friends somehow?
10:17You're a smart whore
10:19You did it, you f***ing did it
10:21I'm so proud of you
10:24Oh shit
10:25It's hard, I'll help you, let me help you
10:31Perfect
10:38So Mel, you started solving a puzzle, you hit one small obstacle, then you wanted to end it all
10:44Do you think you may have overreacted?
10:46No, I think I need meds and a chat
10:49I love Conchetta like the stepdaughter she is to me
10:53But she's raised by a phone and a, like
10:56We did not see eye to eye on how to solve that problem
11:00In that Conchetta tried and you didn't
11:03So you were in charge of being cross and whinging
11:06And Conchetta was in charge of being optimistic I felt
11:09I felt like you were quite happy to have a go
11:11I was so excited to see Mel to like split the challenge of the task
11:16I had only so many brain cells working
11:19So Conchetta you were happy and Mel was very cross
11:21I feel like I've worked out the team name
11:23Ernie and Bert
11:27I think that's the team
11:29I don't think I have to go out on a limb
11:31The other team are three
11:32I think I'm just going to call them the Muppets
11:35I haven't even seen what they're going to do
11:37But I feel like they're going to live up to the name
11:40Conchetta and Mel took 18 minutes and 5 seconds to complete the puzzle
11:45Speedy
11:46More ball suit shape shifters after this
11:49CHEERING
12:00Welcome back to Taskmaster
12:02A show which has afforded Aaron Chen a unique opportunity
12:05to offload his bulky old DVDs as a prize
12:09Speaking of DVDs, my nickname for this guy here is Special Features
12:13Special Features, where are we?
12:16Our contestants are attempting to put seven shapes into a perfect square tower
12:20The next team have to whisper encouragingly to each other every 30 seconds
12:24And I was hoping maybe we could do a bit of an example of what they have to do
12:27Oh
12:28Um, you're not that annoying
12:32That'll have to do
12:33It's Aaron, Peter and Rhys
12:35Oh, here's one
12:37Hey!
12:39Your balls are my favourite
12:40Thank you
12:42Forget what your parents told you, I believe in you, OK?
12:46That's so awesome
12:48Was that supportive?
12:49It's really supportive because he's saying like he believes in me
12:53As opposed to?
12:54My parents who don't
12:58I reckon that other yellow one comes on this side
13:00Does the blue and the orange fit together? They don't
13:02Aaron
13:03Um, your outfit is spic and specs
13:08Specs
13:13This is the most brain training I've had for a while
13:15Yeah, I reckon they go, I reckon that
13:22Do we want to start with the yellows?
13:24What about like that?
13:25Yeah
13:26Maybe the purple starts at the bottom
13:27I don't know
13:28This is good, I think this is good
13:30Have you considered instituting a method of some kind?
13:33Just let us do the job please
13:34OK
13:35Let's think about this laterally
13:36Two, I see the block there
13:40This is like watching A Beautiful Mind right now
13:41Yeah
13:42Yeah, OK
13:43Let's start again
13:44Yeah
13:45Let's start at the bottom
13:48Maybe purple on the side next to the red, have we done that?
13:51I don't know what we've done!
13:54I don't know what we've done but I love that you're keeping your eye just straight
13:57I don't think we could do this without you
13:59Thank you
14:00To be fair, you've yet to prove that you can do it with it
14:03What do you think your role is in this show?
14:05And then what if greeny?
14:06Green could go here
14:07There's no long L shape is the problem
14:10That's the problem?
14:11I think there's probably a series of problems
14:13When's lunch?
14:14I'm going to get a coffee and then come back and
14:16What would you like? What coffees?
14:17Let's have a flat white
14:18Yeah, maybe triple shot espresso
14:21Triple shot espresso
14:22We've got to get this done
14:23OK
14:24Yeah, that looks like a flat white
14:25Yeah
14:26That would be the triple espresso
14:27Lovely
14:28I mean, what if it is a square?
14:29Yeah, like E equals MC squared, has anyone actually really road tested that?
14:33Wait, what if we go
14:35Put a pin in that for a second
14:36Let's come back to that idea but Aaron might have worked it out
14:39Like this there
14:41This is jazzing at the moment
14:43Let's give it a moment
14:44Cue the stirring music
14:45And then if you put the purple block and then I'll put the green in the middle there
14:49Yes!
14:50Hold my coffee, thanks Tom
14:52I've got work to do, mate
14:56Yeah!
14:57Yay!
15:02I hate to say I told you so but the Muppets delivered
15:07And I must say I've never seen a group take so long to do a task that they had a coffee break in the middle
15:13You spent nine minutes not adding or moving any blocks
15:16just talking about whether to get a pepperoni or supreme pizza while waiting for your coffee
15:21And I still reckon pepperoni
15:24Peter, you seem quite confused with basic shapes
15:28And then you thought from that position you could launch into questioning E equals MC squared
15:33It's not my strength
15:34You know, I know basic stuff
15:36I know H2O is water but I thought CO2 was cordial
15:39That's where I'm at
15:46Aaron, did I hear you get a triple shot?
15:48Yeah
15:49Do you get a triple shot all the time?
15:50No, just to get through this day
15:53Well, you think that the challenge is putting the blocks together but it's dealing with these guys
15:59They are hard work
16:01I've also got a list of a few compliments
16:04Aaron to Pete, you're a nice bastard
16:08Pete to Aaron, you should have hosted Fisk
16:16Pete to Reece, I like the way you took control of our pizza order
16:20Because I don't think the production took it seriously for a while there
16:24Until you were like, no, we want pizza
16:28Pete to Aaron, I'm a bit worried if we have coffee and pizza I might shit my pants
16:37Alright, well I need to come up with the score
16:39Well, if we remember correctly, Conchita and Mel took 18 minutes and 5 seconds
16:43The Muppets took 52 minutes and 15 seconds
16:47I think Ernie and Bert obviously win, 5 points each
16:53And the Muppets get 2-2-2
16:55Alright, hit us with another task
16:57This next task deploys a device that I relate to
17:00It hovers around and has an SD card inside it that's very hard to get out
17:17Hi Tom
17:18Hi Reece
17:19How are you doing?
17:20I'm okay
17:21Holy schmokes
17:24This for me?
17:25Great, I was hoping this would be it
17:27Film the most emotional scene on this drone
17:30You must not get closer than 5 metres from the drone
17:35During drone scene filming
17:37Most emotional drone scene wins
17:40You have 60 minutes
17:41Your time starts now
17:45I've never filmed an emotional drone scene before
17:47Really?
17:48Yeah, never
17:49I think you'll betray me and I'll have to murder you and then go outside and mourn
17:54Thank you for saying that my death would be a horrific tragedy
17:57In the film
17:59Do you like drones these days used for a lot of property videos?
18:02Or like real estate
18:03Real estate videos?
18:04What are some of the huge emotional moments in life?
18:06You lose something
18:07Fiction
18:08Wallet in, wallet in
18:10Fire
18:11Fiction
18:12Wallet in, wallet in
18:13Phone
18:14God, imagine losing your phone
18:15Losing your phone, wow
18:17Do you think you could play a guy who's cheated on me?
18:19I'm actually quite loyal but I'll
18:21Remember that very powerful scene in Saving Private Ryan
18:26I haven't seen it
18:27Okay
18:29Can we just do a bit of improv now?
18:31Okay
18:32Hey
18:33Who is she?
18:34Her name's Emma
18:35You're just going to say her name?
18:37Yeah
18:38That poor
18:39She's awesome
18:40What's your strongest European language?
18:42I did a year of German in year 8
18:45Me too
18:46Is this our first idea? Could we go better?
18:50No, there's nothing more important in life than your phone
18:53Ich habe eine große Hose schoner
18:56Hose schoner
18:58What's that?
18:59Trouser snake
19:01That's going to be the first line of the film
19:04Okay
19:05Yeah
19:11So we've got quite a range there
19:13Pete thought it would be very emotional if you lost your sons in a war
19:16And Mel, you thought it would be emotional if you lost your phone
19:21Stand by that
19:22Because I've had to choose between getting my son out of the bath
19:25Or maybe dropping my phone in the bath
19:27And oh, I took a bit too long to make that choice
19:32Okay
19:33Whose drone are we going to look at first?
19:35You can catch her droning on the airwaves every morning
19:37It's Conchita Carristo
19:39Today's the day
19:40He's going to propose
19:41I can feel it
19:42Oh, Emma
19:43Oh, Emma
19:45Take the moment in
19:46Conchita, it's happening
19:48Oh, it's so naughty
19:50He's been sneaking around
19:52And trying to find the perfect ring
19:54I love sexting you on my iPad
19:57So soak it up, babe
19:59Here's to forever
20:03Take the moment in
20:04Conchita, it's happening
20:07Hi, babe
20:08Hi, Conchita
20:09I missed you
20:11Conchita
20:12It's happening
20:13Yeah
20:15I found this dog shit on the ground
20:17I thought you'd like it
20:19You don't know me at all
20:27Do you often offer women dog shit?
20:31I'd like to say that Conchita scripted that scene
20:34Were you worried people would watch that and think it was all true?
20:37I think my concern wasn't that people would think it was true
20:40But it was more that they would think I was doing stuff that I'd done before
20:43Like kissing a mannequin repeatedly
20:45You kissing the mannequin wasn't that disturbing
20:47Because I felt pretty sure you'd never done that before
20:50Whereas I felt that, Conchita, you have sat in a bathtub
20:53Looking at a mirror of yourself before
20:55Was that based on your life?
20:57Yeah, that's a self-care Sunday
21:01Alright, more drone, take me higher, Lesser Tom
21:04It would be my dream
21:05Here's Rhys Nicholson
21:08G'day, I'm Tom
21:10From Cashman, Cashman and Cashman Real Estate
21:12We're here at the Taskmaster Retreat
21:14It's a three-better
21:20How's this for negative, Gary?
21:37How's this for positive, Gary?
21:43Catharsis
22:04Catharsis
22:05You're a millennial and you're complaining about real estate prices
22:08How did you come up with this unique opinion?
22:11I think that I looked at everyone's life from my parents and before that
22:15And thought, f***
22:19But don't you own a house?
22:21Yeah, I own two
22:24So you're just cynically trying to be down with your generation
22:27When really your generation is called your tenants
22:29Your tenants
22:34Alright, time for some ads
22:35Why not call your local real estate agent and check in on them
22:38We'll be back soon with more high, intense blades
22:41Flying close to under-insured comedians' faces
22:54Welcome back to Taskmaster
22:55So far we've seen comedians using a drone
22:58To film tragically depressing things
23:00Like a break-up
23:01Or catharsis
23:02Or lesser Tom's face
23:04Who's next?
23:05There's a lot of buzz around her at the moment
23:07It's probably the aerial filming equipment
23:09Here's Mel Buttle
23:11Oh, my phone's on my pocket
23:14I might be in the car
23:15I'll check the car
23:24It's not in the car
23:26My phone's not in the car
23:28Which means it
23:30It fell in the bath
23:33Come back to me, baby
23:34Baby, come back
23:35Come on, come on, come on
23:36It wasn't that much water
23:38Let me blow in your hole
23:39I'm gonna need rice
23:41I'm gonna need 500 grams of white rice
23:43Does anyone have anything?
23:46It's not in chewing
23:56Powerful
23:57Very emotional
23:58Thank you
23:59To be fair, even though it was a trivial problem
24:01I felt the emotion was real
24:02It's very real, Tom
24:03Can I just say, Mel, and I love you
24:05But you were like, this girl was raised by her phone
24:08And then your whole thing was about your phone
24:10Yeah, but I've got two degrees
24:11So, it's different
24:15Is the name of that film Nobody Had Rice?
24:18Because that's a tragedy in my culture as well
24:20Because that's a tragedy in my culture as well
24:27Thank you, Aaron, for saying a joke that none of us could have said
24:38Who have we got next then?
24:39He's done a lot of work on air, but can he work up in the air?
24:42The answer is up in the air
24:44Here's Aaron Chan
24:51Ich habe eine große Hoseschranke
24:54Good, good
24:58Now, that's business
25:001, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10
25:07Ja
25:10Das British Spy
25:12Yes
25:13Specken Sie Englisch
25:17Das Taget
25:20Ja
25:27Ja
25:34Hallo, tschüss
25:35Meiner Großvater?
25:38Ja, ja
25:40Das ist nicht Deutscher
25:43Was ist das?
25:44Deutschlandmehl, klassisch Deutschlandmehl
25:47Nein, das ist nicht Wiener
25:49Das ist nicht Berliner
25:50Du bist Traitor
25:53Nein, nein, nein, nein
25:55Du bist Deutscher
25:57Oh
25:59Du kannst
26:02Achtung
26:04So
26:06Hey, Deutschland
26:12Meine Katze ist sehr gefährlich
26:16Das ist nicht gut
26:29So
26:32I feel like there was not so much German, but there was a lot of English
26:35It was a co-production between two nations
26:40Can I say, the other people often would give me a script of what to say
26:45Aaron refused to give me a script
26:48and said, you just have to improvise using all the German you know
26:53Okay, one more drone scene left
26:55Can he get more emotional than when he realised he actually had to finish a puzzle earlier?
26:59It's Peter Hellyer
27:01Hello, hello
27:03I'm Mrs. Ryan
27:05Hello, Mrs. Ryan
27:06Are you from the army?
27:07Yes
27:08That's a coincidence
27:09I have four sons currently serving in World War II
27:14Is that a letter for me, for my sons?
27:17On my birthday?
27:19Sorry
27:20Which is also on Mother's Day
27:21Don't be sorry
27:22This is the happiest day of my life
27:25Which is also on Mother's Day
27:27Don't be sorry
27:28This is the happiest day of my life
27:30That's why I'm wearing my happy clothes
27:35What?
27:36One of my sons is...
27:39No!
27:42So emotional
27:44Well, at least I have three more sons
27:48This is the...
27:52Not another one
27:53No!
27:55I'm so emotional
27:57At least I have two more sons
27:59Sorry
28:00What?
28:04What?
28:07No!
28:12This is the worst day I've had in a long time
28:16I'm very emotional
28:18Worst days?
28:19Yes, I'm a big sports fan
28:21Sometimes my team loses
28:24Sorry
28:25What?
28:26This is from my fourth son?
28:28Oh, don't tell me
28:29Do not tell me
28:31Not all...
28:32Oh, it's a Foxtel bill
28:34220 bucks
28:36No!
28:40So emotional
28:48It was a very emotional scene, Pete
28:50It was
28:51It was a hard scene to shoot
28:52It took a while
28:53The crew, there wasn't a dry eye
28:55Even the audience, they're all...
28:57Don't show them
28:59I don't want you to show them
29:00But they are all...
29:02They're all crying
29:03And also, I felt like you frocking up
29:05It really kind of delivered on your 90s comedy roots
29:09Yes
29:10I've always been inspired by the footy show
29:14Alright, well
29:15I think that some delivered on the emotion more strongly than others
29:17I feel like Reece's
29:18It was pandering to the masses
29:20By trying to tap into the current housing crisis
29:22So I'm giving you one
29:23Is there a housing crisis?
29:27Aaron, I'm giving two points to
29:28It was an emotional film
29:30But the emotion I felt was boredom
29:32I'm giving three points to Conchetta
29:34Because I felt those emotions were real
29:36But weirdly, not as real as Mel's emotion
29:38About missing a phone
29:40So Mel gets four
29:41Thank you
29:42And Peter Hellier
29:43Because he made me feel happy
29:44With some old school comedy
29:47Gets five points
29:52Ok, well remote controls are essential to operate drones
29:55When it comes to ones for television
29:57It's poor form to touch them at times like this
29:59See you after some advertising
30:12Welcome back to Taskmaster
30:13We're not even two episodes into the season
30:16And Pete Hellier's already put on a dress
30:18Would you like a score update?
30:19Ah, yes
30:20So currently we have Reece in last place
30:22On seven points
30:23But Mel Buddle is currently in the lead with 12 points
30:29Have you got another task?
30:30Sure do
30:31I would like to apologise to all these supernatural women
30:33Whose headgear we used for this next one
30:47Very interesting
30:52Tom
30:55Ok
31:00Crack the seal on another one
31:02Hide these ten witch's hats on a Taskmaster retreat
31:05You have ten minutes to hide them
31:07Tom will then have ten minutes to hide them
31:09You have ten minutes to hide them
31:11You have ten minutes to hide them
31:13You have ten minutes to hide them
31:15Tom will then have ten minutes to search for them
31:18Most witch's hats remaining hidden
31:20After Tom Search wins
31:21Time starts now
31:22Hide ten
31:29Interesting approach there Aaron
31:30Your first thought was to run away from the witch's hats
31:34I thought I had to hide from them
31:38Alright, this seems pretty straightforward
31:40A game of Cone, Hide and Seek
31:42Who are we seeing first?
31:43It's easy to tell which is which
31:44But which is better at hiding witch's hats?
31:46Conchita or Pete?
31:51Before you say that straight away
31:53I'll come back for that
31:54Oh that's too heavy
31:55See ya
31:56Come on
32:00Ok
32:01You've just one at a time
32:03I bought that idea
32:07Shit
32:08Shit
32:12Oh god
32:13So unfit
32:15He's going to look in the shed straight away
32:17Behind the shed
32:21Oh god
32:22Ok
32:23Back to running
32:25Right in there
32:29Good luck mate
32:31Good f***ing luck
32:36Why that?
32:37I heard him back here
32:39There's one
32:41I've spotted three cones
32:42Where are the others?
32:43I don't know
32:44There's a fourth
32:45There's two
32:46Not even hidden at all
32:47There's one on the roof
32:48How did you see that?
32:49I found three
32:50There's a fifth one
32:51Where did you put the other cones?
32:52Over here
32:53That means it's down here
32:55There's a sixth one
32:56I found three
32:57Three more
32:58I found six in total
33:01Seven
33:02There's another one
33:03Eighth one, spotted
33:05That's an eighth one
33:06There's two more
33:09Oh
33:10F***
33:12The task's over Pete
33:14I found eight
33:15Well done
33:16Blow your whistle
33:18Blow it
33:20Blow it
33:21Ok, six seconds left
33:22Five
33:23Four
33:24Three
33:25Two
33:26One
33:27Good stuff Pete
33:28You really eluded me with the two
33:30Three
33:31Two
33:32One
33:34That wasn't a whistle
33:35Good stuff Pete
33:36Good stuff
33:37That wasn't a whistle
33:38It wasn't a whistle
33:49That's actually it
33:50Ok, hang on a second
33:51I'm just going to
33:52I'm going to try to get this door open mate
33:53Yeah, there it is
33:54Oh
33:55Mate, I'm going to try to get this door open
33:57Yeah, there it is
33:58Oh
33:59Mate, I was doing my best
34:00Yeah, right, you were trying to open it
34:01I was trying
34:02Why did you live through here?
34:03I literally was running non-stop
34:05and I couldn't fit the men's
34:07Ok
34:08You just get to prance around like a little fairy
34:09but I'm literally doing manual labour
34:11Were you trying on your side?
34:12Yeah, I was trying on my side
34:13Were you?
34:14I was definitely trying on my side
34:15Oh man, well done
34:16Thanks Pete
34:17Yeah, speak about it
34:21Pete, I'm surprised your strategy
34:23of chucking the cones
34:24wherever you happened to be running
34:26didn't pay off
34:27I wish I had thought about
34:29locking Tom in a room earlier
34:32I love in these little tasks
34:34just seeing what a true little psycho you are
34:37Like, when you were going
34:40that I was like
34:41F*** yeah
34:44I'd been given a task
34:46to find as many as I could
34:47and I took that seriously
34:48I feel like we've got an insight
34:49into what you look like, Pete, on bin night
34:51You're running around in a panic
34:54Throwing shit in all different directions
34:56Now, Conchetta, you implied
34:58that his job's very easy
34:59unlike you, who was doing manual labour
35:02Is that what you think manual labour is?
35:05No, seriously, Tom
35:06They were so heavy
35:08Like, for it to be equal
35:09you should wear cement blocks
35:11around your feet
35:12So it seemed like a really hard job
35:15from the basis that you work at Triple J
35:20For both Pete and Conchetta
35:22I found 8 of the 10 cones
35:24Alright, Lesser Tom, who's next?
35:25It's the two contestants
35:26who were most frustrated by my presence
35:28throughout the series
35:29Will they thrive in my absence?
35:30It's Mel and Rhys
35:37Where did you put the cones?
35:38What? What?
35:40Hi Tom
35:41Two cones up there
35:43Maybe, I don't know
35:44I'm not sure where they are
35:45Where did you put the other cones?
35:46I can't remember
35:48He'll never get
35:53Oh
36:01I didn't see it
36:12Third time
36:23Trying to think where you'd put them
36:30Oh shit
36:31That's not what we want at all
36:33Well
36:35He's finding that one
36:41Fourth time
36:43Would you like to give me a hint?
36:44Um, they're orange
36:45and they're about that big
36:46Yeah, I knew that
36:47Quick, go, quick sticks
36:52Whoop
36:58Another hint
36:59A woman hid them
37:00Think like a woman
37:01What would a woman do?
37:03I have no idea
37:05I know
37:08Oh, good boy
37:11Don't, don't, don't, no
37:13That's a cone
37:16That's two
37:17You're doing so well Tom
37:18Haven't even found half of them
37:23About a minute I reckon
37:36Time two
37:37Good boy
37:38You think I'm too smart
37:40I just hid them really dumb places
37:42Like where?
37:43Up your butt
37:45Oh
37:46We've got to swap jobs, haven't we?
37:48A little bit
37:49I can't think of any
37:50Haven't we?
37:51Yeah
37:52A little bit
37:53I can't let you know how you've done
37:54because my job's just to administer the task
37:55Bye Tom
37:57Thanks Rhys
38:01I'm surprised you didn't find more of Rhys' cones
38:03since they were
38:04since they were so close to home
38:07and by that I mean up your arse
38:09I got them up there pretty far
38:11I'm not sure the task went as you planned
38:14Lesser Tom
38:15There were so many of you just walked by
38:16I know, I'm sorry
38:17Did a man look, didn't you?
38:20No
38:26Now Rhys, I see your strategy of hiding the cones
38:28worked well for you
38:29unlike Pete's where you just throw them in a ditch
38:32I was so puffed by the end of it
38:33To watch that footage would be quite troubling for me
38:35I think, because I was muttering to myself
38:37like I was burying a backpacker
38:39Like it was
38:45I've never said that before
38:46and I never will again
38:51Mel, were you tempted to tell Tom where the cones were
38:54when he asked?
38:55No, not once, no
38:56No, I hated the maggot
39:02So, what are the stats?
39:03Mel, I found five
39:05and for Rhys, I only found two out of ten cones
39:10OK
39:11It's time for an ad break
39:13If you don't want to watch the ads
39:15pay for a streaming version of this
39:17If you don't want to pay for the streaming version
39:19watch it on YouTube
39:20I don't give a shit
39:21Back soon
39:32Welcome back to Taskmaster
39:33Before the break we saw Rhys and Mel are really good at cones
39:37I wonder what that says about their teenage years
39:40Right, next contestant please
39:42Can he make these high-viz cones low-viz?
39:44It's Aaron Chen
39:50Hi Aaron
39:52How are you doing?
39:53Why did I do that?
40:01What are you doing Aaron?
40:04Aaron?
40:05Hi Tom
40:06How are you man?
40:07I'm alright, are you locking me in here?
40:09I'm just hiding cones mainly
40:11Oh, OK
40:14How much longer Tom?
40:1535 seconds
40:16Getting pretty worried
40:20You know
40:32Hi Aaron
40:41There's one
40:42I had a lot of time to hide that
40:44It's two
40:46There's three
40:47Double cone
40:48That's four
40:49Where did you hide the cones?
40:50You broke the door mate
40:51You broke the door?
40:52It was property damage
40:53You put a lock on it
40:56Oh my god
40:57Did he fall? Yes!
41:02Oh my god
41:03I hope you're not OK
41:05Did you hide any down here?
41:06Yep, heaps
41:07One, two, three, four, five
41:09Five spotted
41:10Only one remaining
41:11All this happened for no reason
41:13Yeah, you broke property as well
41:14Stop focusing on the property
41:17Sorry, do you guys mind calling the owners?
41:19Because there's been a bit of property damage
41:23How'd you go?
41:26Nine out of ten
41:27You put a padlock on the shed?
41:28Yeah, to make sure that the property was secure
41:31It wasn't very secure though, was it?
41:32See you later mate
41:33I'm OK with it, but I don't know
41:35They probably won't be able to show some of that footage
41:37because of certain crimes being committed
41:40Could actually be bad for your reputation
41:43Thanks Aaron
41:47Thank you
41:49Aaron, you went from cat got the cream to humble pie very quickly
41:52How long did you think you were going to keep him in there for?
41:54I thought it was secure
41:58It wasn't even the padlock that broke, it was the hinge itself
42:01That's why I was saying it's property damage
42:03When we left the property, we informed the owners
42:06and they said, oh yeah, that's been faulty for a while, that's fine
42:09So it was an inside job
42:12I think we were all very pleased to see you make Lesser Tom slip over
42:17I feel like an extra point might be allocated there, Lesser Tom
42:19I really enjoyed watching you fall on your face
42:22For Aaron, I found nine, so Rhys should get five
42:25Mel should get four
42:26How many points are we giving Pete and Conchetta?
42:28Pete and Conchetta maybe should get three each
42:30OK
42:31To leave room for, well Aaron's normally last on one
42:34but he did make you slip over, so he gets two
42:36Gotcha
42:37Thank you
42:39Alright, it's almost time for our live task
42:41but first, what does our scoreboard look like overall, Lesser Tom?
42:44With 16 points, Mel is our current top dog
42:51Let's head upstairs for the final task of the show
42:59Alright, Lesser Tom, what are we doing now?
43:01Pete, read the task please
43:03Be humble as pie about...
43:06Be humble as pie about your pie
43:09Each contestant will have 15 seconds to be humble about their pie
43:14Least humble about their pie will be eliminated
43:18The first speaker will begin on Tom's whistle
43:22Ready, set
43:25The pastry is a bit affordable, it's made from margarine, not butter
43:28and it's not very brown
43:31It's the best I've got, it's the best I can do
43:36Pete
43:38Yeah, it's OK
43:40You know, it's not as good as my mum's or my nan's
43:43or my great-grandfather who fought in the War of Gallipoli
43:46and they used to make...
43:48They used to make pies
43:49but that's without it
43:51Concetta
43:53Hey, I would love you to have this
43:56but I, like, I know I look fancy
43:58but I don't know what I'm doing
44:00Like, I'm a loser and you're so cool
44:04Rhys
44:09There's just so many good birds that I could have chosen
44:12These don't even like good shiny shit
44:14It's just...
44:17Ready, Aaron
44:21Oh man, yeah, this is...
44:23It's just... It's a number, you know
44:26I mean, like, forget about it
44:28Yeah, it sucks
44:29It sucks
44:32The least humble was Aaron Chen
44:34He very arrogantly threw his pie on the ground
44:37I didn't realise it could break
44:41Noel, could you read this one please?
44:42Certainly
44:44Be keen as mustard about your mustard
44:46Your keenness starts now
44:48Oh my God, it's awesome, it's in powder form
44:51Like, you can go like this and it's like
44:53Yeah, you can be like, woo!
44:55And like, it's awesome, I want you to play with it, Tom
44:58You can have some, you get in it
45:00Oh no, it's showing, yes!
45:02Yes!
45:04Rhys
45:06That is the chemical formula for mustard gas
45:26Mel
45:28Oh wowie, look at that
45:30Oh my God, I want to get in there
45:31I want to lick that, I want to rip that off
45:34Oh jeez Louise, that is some good...
45:36I want to touch it
45:37Oh, that's...
45:39Pete
45:41Oh yes
45:42Oh
45:45Oh God
45:53I don't think Rhys was keen
45:54They just seemed terrified
45:59Thank you Sean
46:00Be cool as a cucumber about your cucumber
46:05Oh damn, that's lit as fam
46:07Wicked
46:09Well, what's the dealio?
46:12Stop blowing up my phone with SMS's
46:15Stop tweeting me
46:17Pete
46:19Alright, whatever, cool
46:20You know, it's cool, it's good, whatever
46:22I don't care, I'll just, you know, just go for it
46:29Good
46:31Good turn out
46:33Oh yeah, this whole thing
46:35This thing rides a motorcycle
46:37And, you know, it's like
46:39I don't even care, like
46:44I can't lie to Pete
46:45He was the least cool before he even tried
46:50Can you read this please, Mel?
46:52Be smooth as silk about your silk
46:55Smoothest wins
46:57No
47:00What's up, G?
47:01You come here often?
47:02Damn, mommy, you're woo-hoo
47:05Oh
47:06Mm-mm, did you just walk in here looking like this, or?
47:09Wow, heaven is missing an angel
47:16Oh baby doll
47:19The way you make me feel
47:23You nasty girl
47:25You, you are smooth
47:35Given my wife and children watch this show
47:38Mel was the smoothest
47:39Thank you Tom
47:42Okay, the contestants have to walk from up there to down here
47:44And it takes just long enough for us to wedge in an ad break
47:47See you soon
47:56Welcome back to Taskmaster
47:59We're about to find out who the best comedian is of all time in Australia
48:04On this channel, in this episode, tonight
48:07But before we do that, who won the live task, Tom?
48:10Well, Aaron took away a cool one point
48:12Rhys, a smooth two
48:13Pete, a keen three
48:14Conchetta, a humble four
48:16And Mel took it out with a spicy five points
48:18Thank you
48:20Okay, now what we really want to know
48:23Who will be leaving the show tonight with that horrible, horrible, captivating gnome?
48:28Well, Aaron was in last place with 12 points
48:30Pete and Rhys in third, equal on 14 points
48:33Conchetta second with 17 points
48:35And Mel way out in front with blackjack, 21 points
48:41Congratulations Mel
48:43Head up on stage and collect your bounty of cheeky crapping boxes
48:49Listen Tom, what's our season scoreboard looking like?
48:52Well, there are only three points between all of them
48:54So it's neck and neck and neck and neck and neck
48:58With Conchetta in the lead with 32 points this season
49:04Okay, and that brings us to the end of another episode of Taskmaster
49:08We've learned Aaron definitely doesn't sprecken any Deutsch
49:12And we've learned that professional comedian Tom Cashman
49:15Is at his funniest when face planting into mud
49:19Now let's learn how Mel Buddle will enjoy their prizes
49:23See you next week
49:39Fuck!
49:40No!
49:41I'm in your freaking mind
49:42Is there any part of your personality that's not Italian?
49:46Nice whistle bitch
49:47You need to use this paddle to hit a koala
49:50Yeah, I guess what I'm hoping for at this stage is the others have fucked up their task