Life for a successful power couple get thrown for a loop when the wife finds out she's pregnant HD
Life for a successful power couple get thrown for a loop when the wife finds out she's pregnant HD
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Do you want mommy to put you on medication?
00:00:02Is that what you want?
00:00:03Like your friend Jenny?
00:00:04Do you want to be a zombie?
00:00:19Can you stop staring?
00:00:21Look at it.
00:00:22No.
00:00:24Look. No.
00:00:26Look at it.
00:00:31Look.
00:00:33Wow.
00:00:34Aren't you supposed to pick up Sylvie's car today?
00:00:36Shit.
00:00:38Yeah.
00:00:39Alright, killjoy.
00:00:40I'm going to throw some powder in my balls.
00:00:41We'll get out of here.
00:00:43Hi, counselor.
00:00:45Oh, Sandy.
00:00:46Who's your gorgeous friend?
00:00:48You think he's gorgeous?
00:00:49You ought to see his wife.
00:00:51Is his wife's understanding as yours is?
00:00:53She's understanding.
00:00:54Not that understanding.
00:00:56Are you a lawyer too?
00:00:57Yeah, yes.
00:00:58Danny and I are partners.
00:01:00Well, Mr. Lawyer.
00:01:04I'm a relaxation therapist.
00:01:06So if you get as stressed as your friend Danny,
00:01:09come and see me.
00:01:15That's so you don't forget me.
00:01:17Nobody's forgetting you, honey.
00:01:21What exactly am I supposed to do with this?
00:01:24Frame it. I don't give a shit.
00:01:25I get like seven of them.
00:01:31Maybe I'll get lucky and Danny will have a heart attack
00:01:33doing arm squats or whatever.
00:01:36But you're going to have a great day today.
00:01:37Call me when it's over, okay?
00:01:38Okay, I will.
00:01:39Say bye to your auntie Angela.
00:01:40Bye!
00:01:41Bye!
00:01:44Ryan Scott Chamber!
00:02:01How come old guys got to walk around the locker room naked?
00:02:05Are you cheating on Sylvie?
00:02:06No.
00:02:08I take candy for a service.
00:02:10Candy could do a lot better, you know.
00:02:11Hey.
00:02:13When we got married, Sylvie looked like Angela.
00:02:15I looked like you when the kids came along.
00:02:18We want to have kids. Eventually.
00:02:20Nothing wrong with a little side action now and then.
00:02:22Oh, well, then I guess you wouldn't mind if Sylvie got a little side action.
00:02:25No, no, no, no, no.
00:02:28Oh, well, then I guess you wouldn't mind if Sylvie got a little side action now and then.
00:02:31You be as judgmental as you want.
00:02:32You're going to be here one day.
00:02:35Hello.
00:02:36Yes, I need to get the samples to the conference room in an hour.
00:02:38Don't even worry about it, Angela. I'm so on it.
00:02:40I'm just running a little bit late.
00:02:42You hung up on me.
00:02:43I love that lipstick. What is that? Pink Blush?
00:02:45You can't borrow it.
00:02:47Oh, wait.
00:02:51Did I tell you I'm in love?
00:02:52Hello?
00:02:56No, you're not in love.
00:02:57Yes, I am.
00:02:58No, you're not.
00:02:59Angie, my cart is full.
00:03:02It's a big day for me.
00:03:03Hey, Angie.
00:03:06Okay, who's the lucky lover?
00:03:07Well, I can't say anything yet.
00:03:09Except that he has everything a woman would ever want in a man.
00:03:13Except he's gay.
00:03:22Miss Black, you still have not answered my question.
00:03:25Do you truly believe that you deserve more of my client's money?
00:03:29It says explicitly in the contract.
00:03:32Contract?
00:03:33How about the contract you signed when you said, I do?
00:03:36I tend to remember an important clause in that contract, for better or for worse.
00:03:40Does that ring a bell?
00:03:41Objection!
00:03:42Speaks to character, Your Honor.
00:03:45I'll allow it.
00:03:46He cheated on me.
00:03:48Whoa, whoa, whoa, circumstantial.
00:03:50There is not one piece of physical evidence that proves my client straight.
00:03:54What about the text messages?
00:03:56The photos?
00:03:57What about that filthy video on YouTube?
00:04:01Circumstantial.
00:04:02Your Honor.
00:04:03Tread carefully, Counselor.
00:04:04You never see my client's face in any of them.
00:04:07Miss Black, you still have not answered my question.
00:04:09My client has graciously given you and your children the family home
00:04:13with an estimated value of $4 million.
00:04:16That's a 4.5.
00:04:18$4.5 million.
00:04:21Do you really believe that you deserve more than that?
00:04:27He signed a contract.
00:04:30He signed the contract.
00:04:33Does that sound heartfelt, Your Honor?
00:04:35Does that sound like someone who truly believes that they deserve more money?
00:04:38Does that...
00:04:39Objection, Your Honor.
00:04:40Is my client going to be asked a question in the foreseeable future?
00:04:43I have nothing further.
00:04:45I couldn't have answered it better myself.
00:04:49No fist bumping in court.
00:05:08Nice suit, John.
00:05:10Tie.
00:05:19Good morning, Mary.
00:05:35Okay.
00:05:37For the woman about to start a family,
00:05:41we present the allure of baby on board perfume
00:05:46to keep Daddy interested.
00:05:48The only fragrance especially made for the pregnant woman in love.
00:05:55And here is the bottle prototype.
00:06:00Do you think someone could possibly pass me the bottle
00:06:04of this soon-to-be best-selling scent?
00:06:16I'm sorry. I have a nervous stomach.
00:06:46I'm sorry.
00:07:03What is in this bottle?
00:07:05Perfume.
00:07:07For who? The walking dead?
00:07:10I'm sorry. It's me.
00:07:13I just... I ate something bad.
00:07:15I have a 4-10 meeting with the reps from Saks.
00:07:21And I just hope for your sake this doesn't cling to me.
00:07:25For the rest of you, I suggest you open some windows for ventilation.
00:07:30Try not to jump out.
00:07:39I'm sorry.
00:07:46So, what did they say?
00:07:48Oh, sweet Jesus.
00:07:51Honey, did something crawl up your ass and die?
00:07:53I blew it.
00:07:55Yes, yes. Blew it on the offering of words, all right.
00:07:57I'm sick.
00:07:58Oh, God. No, no, honey. Sick is like poot-poot.
00:08:01Tee-hee. Oh, God. That is demonic.
00:08:04You are not helping.
00:08:05The power of Christ compels you. The power of Christ compels you.
00:08:08I have to get her to approve this stuff.
00:08:10Honey, I know. She will, okay? She will.
00:08:13Angela Marks, are you still there?
00:08:15Yes, I'm still here.
00:08:17Mary would like to see you in her office.
00:08:21I'll be right there.
00:08:22Jesus, that was fast.
00:08:29Seriously, that was great.
00:08:31I thought I'd never get out of that prenup.
00:08:33Honey, come here and meet Curtis.
00:08:35I told you he'd do it.
00:08:36This is my ex-wife's cousin. Worth every penny.
00:08:39Come on. Let's go buy a sex swing.
00:08:43Okay, Uncle Phil.
00:09:05You are amazing.
00:09:06Excuse me?
00:09:07I'm sorry. My name's Arlene Jenkins.
00:09:10Everyone says the same thing about you.
00:09:12There's none better, but I had to see it for myself.
00:09:15My eye grew faint the way you pounded away at that woman.
00:09:20What can I do for you, Mrs. Jenkins?
00:09:23There's a lot you can do to me.
00:09:25Okay.
00:09:26It's my husband. He's a liar.
00:09:29But I'm sad to say I see a lot of that...
00:09:31The son of a bitch told me he was dying.
00:09:33That's the only reason I married him.
00:09:35So he is...
00:09:3697.
00:09:38Have you ever had a 97-year-old man on top of you?
00:09:42It's like fucking a beanbag chair.
00:09:44I didn't need to hear that.
00:09:46We just got his medical report.
00:09:47Besides the fact that he's on an oxygen tank,
00:09:49he's healthy as a hog.
00:09:50He'll probably outlive me.
00:09:51I'm not sure what you want me to do.
00:09:53This is my prenup.
00:09:55I need a way out.
00:09:57Are you sure you want to leave with...
00:09:59With as much as I can carry.
00:10:01Mrs. Jenkins, I shouldn't be looking at this material.
00:10:04Mr. Marks.
00:10:05Curtis.
00:10:07Curtis.
00:10:08I need you.
00:10:14Okay.
00:10:15I will take a look at this,
00:10:17and my office will be in touch.
00:10:21Curtis.
00:10:37You can sit.
00:10:39Unless sitting makes your problem worse.
00:10:46I'm really sorry about that.
00:10:48I think I'm okay now.
00:10:50Is this your family?
00:10:52Wow, your daughter is so...
00:10:54It came with the frame.
00:10:5692.1% of men prefer to deal with a woman who has a family.
00:11:00You know how many men want to have a family?
00:11:04You know how many men want to hire a woman that has a family?
00:11:088.1%.
00:11:10Which just proves conclusively that men are stupid.
00:11:15Now...
00:11:18Speaking of stupid,
00:11:21for the woman who's about to start a family,
00:11:24I should have thrown you out of that conference room
00:11:26for suggesting something so Sesame Street,
00:11:28but unfortunately,
00:11:30I have a board that I have to answer to,
00:11:32and I will vote it.
00:11:35You're approved.
00:11:37Now listen to me.
00:11:39Listen to me really good.
00:11:41You screw this up, it is your ass on the line.
00:11:45Now, I expect a budget and marketing analysis on my desk in one week.
00:11:51Get out.
00:12:02Get out.
00:12:33Wow, what's that for?
00:12:34I missed you today.
00:12:35Me too, guess what?
00:12:37Tell me, how did it go?
00:12:39Mary said yes.
00:12:40She said yes?
00:12:41Yes, she said yes, it's found.
00:12:43Angela, I don't believe this.
00:12:45This is, this is amazing.
00:12:46You are going to have your own perfume line.
00:12:48I know, I mean this is put up or shut up time.
00:12:51All those years in college and business school
00:12:53and then once living away as an intern.
00:12:55Can you believe this?
00:12:56Vice president of one of the biggest cosmetic companies in all of the world.
00:12:59This is huge, this is my everything.
00:13:01Everything?
00:13:02All present company excluded.
00:13:05Angela, since this baby on board thing is such a big deal,
00:13:10maybe you and I should start trying.
00:13:15Trying?
00:13:16Trying to make a baby, you know, lose the condoms.
00:13:22Oh.
00:13:26You okay?
00:13:29Here we are.
00:13:38Why would we want to do that?
00:13:39For research.
00:13:40We'll get you pregnant and then you'll know exactly when.
00:13:48Sorry.
00:13:54Sorry about that.
00:13:57I'm sorry.
00:14:09You're certainly eating a lot.
00:14:12Before you get mad, I don't mean that in a fat people way,
00:14:15I just mean that you're consuming more food than usual.
00:14:19What emptied me out, now I got to fill me back up.
00:14:22Are you listening to me?
00:14:24I'm listening to you, you big lush.
00:14:27Look, all I'm saying is guys like to chase.
00:14:32You take a guy, he gets married, it's like putting a wolf in a cage.
00:14:37Every chick that walks by, it's like a fresh, tasty ribeye.
00:14:42Danny, come on.
00:14:43Maybe we should get a breath of fresh air.
00:14:45What?
00:14:46I'm just trying to make a point.
00:14:48And that would be what?
00:14:50Tell him.
00:14:51Me?
00:14:52Yeah, you tell him.
00:14:53Well, we're all aware of the fact that wealthy men pay for sex.
00:14:59Oh, we are?
00:15:00Are we?
00:15:01I think it's disgusting.
00:15:03Good.
00:15:04Are you having sex with prostitutes?
00:15:10No.
00:15:16Wait, Sylvie, did I tell you about my meeting today with Mary?
00:15:18Danny, did I tell you about the new client that we got?
00:15:20All I'm saying is there are some guys out there who get a little gash on the side and they have to pay for it.
00:15:28It's the only way they can get it, right?
00:15:30And I don't have that problem because I got the looks and I got the money.
00:15:35I got it all, baby.
00:15:36High five.
00:15:40You know, women are looking for a lot more in a relationship than looks and money.
00:15:43You're so drunk.
00:15:45I'm not that drunk.
00:15:47But why don't we actually just get out of here?
00:15:50If that makes you feel special, going out four nights a week, getting drunk, paying for sex, you'd be my guest.
00:15:56But why don't we put the shoe on the other foot, Danny?
00:15:58Why don't you raise the kids for a while while I go out and find every possible excuse to stay away from the house?
00:16:03Then you can spend all day with the carpools and the playdates and the vomit and the laundry and the groceries and shoveling the goddamn snow in the fucking driveway.
00:16:11Why don't you do all those things?
00:16:12Then you can pay whoever the hell you want to fuck you.
00:16:20Okay.
00:16:22You think that I don't bust my ass every goddamn day for you and those kids, huh?
00:16:27You want to talk about stress?
00:16:28Maybe I should go visit a Korean handjob parlor like the rest of the guys in the office do.
00:16:33Fuck it.
00:16:34Can't beat them, join them.
00:16:36You know what?
00:16:37Maybe I will join them.
00:16:39Honey, nobody wants to fuck you.
00:16:46Wait, Sylvie.
00:16:48Sylvie, Sylvie.
00:16:52That was awkward.
00:16:58Sorry about that.
00:17:03Baby?
00:17:05Do you still think that I'm beautiful?
00:17:07Of course I think that you're beautiful.
00:17:09I just lasted three minutes with two condoms on.
00:17:12I wish you were a little more fat or a little more ugly.
00:17:14I might last a little longer.
00:17:16Do you think that I've gained weight?
00:17:18I don't care if you've gained weight.
00:17:20So you think I'm fat?
00:17:22I'm in hell.
00:17:24Baby, I just, I saw Danny and Sylvie tonight and I got scared.
00:17:29Angie, I'm here for you.
00:17:32And if that means at some point down the road you get a little spare tire,
00:17:36maybe some thunder thighs, varicose veins, arm fat, triple chin,
00:17:41I did say for better or for worse, right?
00:17:44But how about we keep it on the better side for at least a little while?
00:17:48What if one day I'm not good enough?
00:17:50Honey, come on.
00:17:51You'll always be good enough.
00:17:56Good night.
00:17:59I mean better than good enough.
00:18:02Fantastic.
00:18:03Good night, Curtis.
00:18:05Wonderful.
00:18:14Marvelous.
00:18:17Oh yeah.
00:18:20Oh yeah, fuck yeah.
00:18:24Give her.
00:18:34You're pathetic.
00:18:36Hey, this is my house.
00:18:38If I want to knock one out of the park now and then, I can do it.
00:18:42Really?
00:18:44Yeah, really.
00:18:47Get out.
00:18:49What?
00:18:50I want you to move out of this house before I actually catch you fucking some whore.
00:18:56I don't fuck whores.
00:18:57I'm so tired, Danny.
00:19:00I'm tired of your staying out all night, your drinking,
00:19:03the lipstick on your underpants, the cheap perfume.
00:19:07I want you out of my life.
00:19:10Fine then.
00:19:12Fine then?
00:19:13Fine then.
00:19:14I'll move out.
00:19:16Fine then.
00:19:18Then move out.
00:19:20Move out.
00:19:24This is my house.
00:19:46Move out.
00:20:06Who is she?
00:20:07What's her name?
00:20:08How long has this been going on?
00:20:09Wait.
00:20:10Why are you leaving me?
00:20:11Hey, what is wrong with you, Angela?
00:20:13I know.
00:20:16You know what?
00:20:17Gee, I know.
00:20:18I saw that bitch in the kitchen.
00:20:22Okay, Angela.
00:20:23You were dreaming.
00:20:25It was a dream.
00:20:26It was your dream.
00:20:27But not my dreams.
00:20:28I've been here, right here, the whole time, trying to sleep,
00:20:31while you've been snoring, belching, and farting, Angela,
00:20:35bad, smelly farts.
00:20:38So you're not cheating on me with a model chick?
00:20:40What model chick?
00:20:47What does she look like?
00:20:48A little Elle MacPherson action?
00:21:02I got your jacket.
00:21:05Do you got everything?
00:21:07Sure do.
00:21:14I'm going to be a little late tonight, honey,
00:21:16so don't wait for me for dinner.
00:21:18I don't think I could, even if I wanted to.
00:21:20I kicked Mary's ass today.
00:21:21I want to hear all about it when I get back.
00:21:25Love you, too.
00:21:34Hey.
00:21:35Hey.
00:21:36I'm so starving.
00:21:37Angela, no.
00:21:38No, you made me promise you.
00:21:39No more bad food.
00:21:40I'm running out of the promise.
00:21:41You said you'd say that.
00:21:42This is the last time.
00:21:43You said you'd say that.
00:21:44Give me a fucking bite.
00:21:47Here, you can have the fries.
00:21:49Thanks.
00:21:51Angela.
00:21:52Angela.
00:21:56Talk about choking the chicken.
00:21:58Anyway, just numbers are looking really good.
00:22:04The prelims are coming in nicely.
00:22:06We really got to wow these money people.
00:22:09Plenty of time to reach wow status.
00:22:11Really, I think everything is going to be fine.
00:22:13I think it is going to be better than fine,
00:22:15even though the Japanese have upped our deadline to June.
00:22:18I think we'll be fine.
00:22:19June?
00:22:20You mean wow by June?
00:22:24No problem.
00:22:26This is your baby.
00:22:27Don't fuck it up.
00:22:29Hello?
00:22:38Sweetie, you give it back to him now.
00:22:40Hey.
00:22:41Oh, hey, I'm so glad you could come.
00:22:42Have you eaten?
00:22:43Just a little nosh.
00:22:44You know what?
00:22:45You two go over there and you shoot each other.
00:22:46That's right.
00:22:47Go over.
00:22:48You have my permission.
00:22:49What's going on?
00:22:50Well, I just needed to see you.
00:22:52I'm so tired.
00:22:58Sucker, piece of shit, fuck balls.
00:23:02You seem tense.
00:23:06I kicked Danny out last night.
00:23:08Oh, my God, Sylvie, what happened?
00:23:11I mean, I probably would have been okay with it.
00:23:13The cheating.
00:23:15If he'd had the decency to at least try to hide it from me.
00:23:20You really would have been okay with that?
00:23:22I'm not stupid.
00:23:23Danny has always been a wild pig.
00:23:25I mean, that's what attracted me to his fat ass in the first place.
00:23:29I know I don't look the same.
00:23:31I know.
00:23:33I used to be so hot.
00:23:36And now I'm just.
00:23:37You are hot.
00:23:39I'm not hot.
00:23:40I will never be that skinny ever again.
00:23:42You are skinny.
00:23:43You are.
00:23:45I turned around the other day and my left tit knocked over a toaster.
00:23:49You have great tits.
00:23:50Your tits are beautiful.
00:23:51They're not, they're saggy.
00:23:53No, they're not.
00:23:54Ryan, Jesus Christ, you could have smuggled Mexicans over the border in my vagina.
00:24:00Enormous.
00:24:02You have a great vagina.
00:24:03Any man would be lucky to be in your vagina.
00:24:06You should see the way he looks at me.
00:24:08It's like I stole something from him.
00:24:11Of course, I'm not okay with the cheating, but if that's what it took to keep him, I would.
00:24:17But at some point he just, he just stopped caring.
00:24:23I can deal with a lot of things, but I can't deal with that.
00:24:28I wish I were a lesbian.
00:24:33Hold on one second, okay?
00:24:44Girl, I am not a doctor, but you have got a bug or something.
00:24:56So, how's my girl?
00:25:01Not so hot.
00:25:02Well, you look pretty hot to me.
00:25:05What's going on inside of you?
00:25:08I can't keep anything down.
00:25:10Really?
00:25:11Have you experienced morning sickness?
00:25:13No way.
00:25:14I mean, I threw up this morning, but it's not morning sickness.
00:25:18Gas?
00:25:21What are we talking about?
00:25:27Look at this.
00:25:31Angela, you're pregnant.
00:25:36No way.
00:25:38Curtis wears protection.
00:25:39Well, one little guy snuck in, and it only takes one.
00:25:43This can't be.
00:25:45Damn him!
00:25:47Angela, do you know how many women who can't get pregnant would love to be in your shoes right now?
00:25:52I can't fit into my shoes.
00:25:55I have so much going on right now.
00:25:57This is the wrong time.
00:25:58Angela, as your friend, I need to tell you this.
00:26:01It's never the right time.
00:26:02I see women in here all day long, and even when they think they're not able to handle this, they are.
00:26:09Hey, you may not think you're ready, but your body is telling you it is.
00:26:16Feel better?
00:26:18No.
00:26:23Mrs. Jenkins, I've got it.
00:26:26I bet you do.
00:26:28Would you say that your husband treats you well?
00:26:31He gives me everything I want.
00:26:32Okay, okay.
00:26:33Is it good enough?
00:26:36Your prenup, section 14, article 3A, hinges on your standard of living, which Mr. Jenkins is obligated to provide.
00:26:43If he does not, your prenup is null and void.
00:26:46So I'm going to ask you again, Mrs. Jenkins, is it good enough?
00:26:59I'm pregnant.
00:27:00I'm not pregnant.
00:27:02I'm not pregnant, okay?
00:27:03I don't want to be pregnant.
00:27:04I don't feel pregnant.
00:27:05You're having sex again.
00:27:06He lied to me.
00:27:07He said that Chucky was covered, little Chucky with two raincoats.
00:27:10Yeah, well, I gotta go, lady.
00:27:12Be glad you're not a woman.
00:27:13Okay, thank you.
00:27:28I have never been so turned on in all of my life.
00:27:32Mrs. Jenkins, Mrs. Jenkins.
00:27:34Come on.
00:27:52Mrs. Jenkins, Mrs. Jenkins, please, Mrs. Jenkins.
00:27:54Mrs. Jenkins, stop it.
00:27:55Mrs. Jenkins, get off of me.
00:27:56Come on.
00:27:57I'm sorry.
00:27:58I'm sorry.
00:27:59You're just so, so tedious.
00:28:00I took two classes on the subject at Harvard.
00:28:02I hated them.
00:28:12Son of a bitch.
00:28:14He was making out with her in front of the whole restaurant.
00:28:16That son of a bitch.
00:28:20Sylvie?
00:28:21Yeah?
00:28:22I'm pregnant.
00:28:27Son of a bitch.
00:28:29What do I do?
00:28:30Oh, honey, I'm gonna come right over right now.
00:28:32I'll be right over.
00:28:34Hello?
00:28:35Oh, I'll call you back. He's here.
00:28:36You call me right back.
00:28:40Hi.
00:28:41Hey.
00:28:48Okay, what's up?
00:28:51You know what's up.
00:28:53Really, you're gonna have to tell me,
00:28:54because I have no idea what you're trying to pull me into here.
00:28:56It's not a what, it's a who.
00:28:58A who? What who?
00:28:59What who? You who! That's what who.
00:29:01I'm sorry, I don't speak Dr. Seuss.
00:29:03Come on, Angela, what's going on?
00:29:05Nothing is going on here, and nothing will go on here.
00:29:08Okay, well, then this fight that we aren't really having is over.
00:29:13No.
00:29:14No?
00:29:15Stop it.
00:29:16Stop what?
00:29:17Answering with a question.
00:29:18Angela, something's wrong.
00:29:19I don't know what it is.
00:29:20Did something happen at work today?
00:29:21Don't change the subject.
00:29:22What subject?
00:29:23I'm pregnant.
00:29:29You're pregnant?
00:29:32Angela, that's amazing.
00:29:35That's wonderful.
00:29:38No, it's not.
00:29:40Yes, Ange, Ange.
00:29:42I know I didn't plan for this,
00:29:44but we're gonna make it work, okay?
00:29:47What is wrong with you?
00:29:48I know plenty of women who would be jumping for joy right now.
00:29:51You know plenty of women?
00:29:52How many women do you know?
00:29:55Okay, Angela, we're gonna be parents.
00:29:59Let's just calm down and be happy about this.
00:30:01Oh, how can I be happy when the father of my child
00:30:03isn't who I thought he would be?
00:30:16She's cheating on me.
00:30:18Don't be ridiculous.
00:30:19You said it yourself.
00:30:21She's hiding something, right?
00:30:23The father isn't who I thought he was.
00:30:25What's that bullshit?
00:30:26She's probably banging some 7-foot-tall black brother.
00:30:29You always use two skins.
00:30:30You always double bag it, right?
00:30:32Yes.
00:30:33All right, look here.
00:30:34Look.
00:30:35It says right here, 97% effective.
00:30:38Now, I'm no math wizard,
00:30:40but 97 times 2, that's like, you know,
00:30:43infinite protection.
00:30:45I can't believe she would do this.
00:30:47Don't be a putz.
00:30:48We see this shit all the time.
00:30:50This shit paid for our houses, all right?
00:30:52Just because it's happening to you,
00:30:54no different.
00:30:58Oh, look at that.
00:31:00Curse, I'd tear that ass up,
00:31:01be like Roberto Duran on a speed bag
00:31:04with my nuts flying up her ass.
00:31:05Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
00:31:22Coming.
00:31:44Are you moving in with your whore?
00:31:49Whose baby is that?
00:31:52What did you say?
00:31:55Fuck you asshole
00:31:58Excuse me
00:31:59You're the one who cheated here. Why is this my fault?
00:32:03Why is everything my fault?
00:32:06Don't throw this on me take some responsibility. Don't push this on me get out
00:32:17Good
00:32:22You
00:32:39Tell me what happened I'm a mess he just stormed out say something
00:32:46Statistically women live five years longer than men keep going
00:32:53Women use their brains a lot more than that. It's not working still crying. There's a handbag sale at Macy
00:33:04He's gone I'm coming over what about the kids they're fine
00:33:15You know, I'll come to you cuz I have to get out of this house
00:33:22I
00:33:24I
00:33:51Looking like
00:33:54I
00:34:03Pay you for the hip dress jiggle a
00:34:09Should've seen Angela's face when we were arguing she was definitely hiding something the way she
00:34:14Something
00:34:21Thanks
00:34:22What am I supposed to do what I did with Danny?
00:34:26Get him to confess and then kick his ass out on the street. I can't do that. I
00:34:32Love him
00:34:35And I love Danny but honey, let's face it
00:34:37Our husbands are lying and cheating bastards who deserve to have their balls ziplocked and stored in a freezer
00:34:42You and I don't deserve that neither does your baby
00:34:46Sweetie, it's not just about you and Curtis anymore
00:34:51Mom I'm hungry eat your brother
00:34:59I gotta go fix her something. You want some broccoli? What do you want?
00:35:12Oh
00:35:36Hey Ryan, what's the matter?
00:35:42I
00:35:45See, of course
00:35:59That was fast, yeah good for you, huh the best two seconds of my life, let's go to Lila
00:36:08Thank you girls
00:36:12Whoa
00:36:15200 bucks for that piece of ass terrific. That means it cost $100 a second
00:36:21Yeah, just kidding. I couldn't get it up
00:36:24I heard you faked it every time I looked at her snatch. I saw Sylvia
00:36:31Hey Danny, do you really think it's possible that somebody's with Angela right now
00:36:38Yeah, I do
00:36:42Round two, buddy
00:37:12You
00:37:42I
00:38:12I'm not leaving
00:38:14I'm staying right here in my house
00:38:17You want to leave and go stay at your man's place feel free?
00:38:21Sure, he'd love to have his whole family under the same roof
00:38:42I
00:38:48Mature real mature. I'm not leaving
00:38:52Great. I'm sure my mom would really like to talk to you when she comes over
00:38:56Your mom's coming. Yeah an hour
00:39:02Hi mom, don't you? Hey mommy, I want kisses. Oh
00:39:08Oh
00:39:10Gosh so I'm in a week. Oh, baby, baby. Yeah a week ago. I didn't know you were giving me a grandchild
00:39:15Oh, you look at that belly. Oh my god. I remember when you were in me
00:39:20It's nature sweetie. Oh feels like a boy. Oh, yeah
00:39:25It's too soon. You cannot tell that now
00:39:27Angela, I know mothers always know but where's Curtis?
00:39:35T
00:39:38Can't be that bad mom, how did you know when dad was?
00:39:47Was what dear
00:39:50was
00:39:52cheating on you
00:39:53that son of a bitch
00:39:56With the baby coming. Where is he? He's not here. Just just calm down cake is I want to run this by you
00:40:00I just want to make sure that I'm not crazy. Huh?
00:40:03How did you know?
00:40:05It was little things
00:40:08All of a sudden he was working all kinds of hours. He was preoccupied with work. He
00:40:14Well, you know, he didn't want
00:40:17Sex I
00:40:23Didn't know for sure until I snuck into his office. Remember that room. It was always such a mess
00:40:28I looked at the phone bill
00:40:29You don't call Susie Edelstein 14 times in a week because of her sparkling conversation
00:40:38God I hated him for what he did to you
00:40:43It's in the past
00:40:46Honey do you really think Curtis is
00:40:51Yeah, I
00:40:54do I
00:40:59Don't know what I did wrong. I I know I work hard, but I really try to make him happy
00:41:03I blow him like three times a week. Okay. All right details are not necessary. I
00:41:13Think I have to leave him
00:41:18That's a big decision honey, maybe now is not the time I promised myself that I would never sit home and wonder
00:41:25And that's what I'm doing
00:41:28Well, then I'll tell you what to do don't leave stand your ground and make Curtis realize what he's throwing away
00:41:35By the time you're done with him, he'll be begging for forgiveness
00:41:39Did you try that with dad?
00:41:42No
00:41:44But Curtis isn't your father and you're not me
00:41:49Try to keep this family from breaking up before it even has a chance to start tough love
00:41:58Tough love tough love you're gonna want to fold you're gonna want to say something nice and sweet
00:42:04Don't the second you do it's a license for her to gobble other men's cocks for the rest of your life
00:42:11No matter how long
00:42:13Even if it takes a year a year don't talk to him for a whole year
00:42:17He'll fold long before that honey. Trust me. He's not the manly type not manly
00:42:22Hey your quarter queer we all knew that back in law school, but this is your opportunity for greatness pal. This is ridiculous
00:42:30I'm getting love advice from a man who just paid $200 to fake fuck a stripper
00:42:34You want to get Angela back or not then do not talk to him
00:42:40He's the father of my child. I know
00:42:42That's the only thing that's keeping me from killing him, sweetie
00:42:52I
00:42:54I
00:43:17For this agreement to be valid and enforceable
00:43:20It must be based on a full mutual disclosure of each party's financial status to the other party
00:43:31Jenkins I am so sorry
00:43:50I
00:44:20Love you
00:44:50I
00:45:20I
00:45:50You
00:46:20You
00:46:36Counselor marks good to see you. Mr. Rowe and
00:46:40Oh, she doesn't speak English. She's Russian
00:46:44Mail order you bring them over for like two grand and they fuck like their life depends on it because it does
00:46:53Don't you uh, don't you have to marry them? Oh, no. All you have to do is say you're gonna marry them
00:47:01Mr. Rowe, I have a very busy day. What can I do for you Curtis?
00:47:04What do they say about you?
00:47:06There's none better. Well, I need you buddy. I need the best. Okay
00:47:12I've already gotten you out of alimony
00:47:17The fucking money pit right in that mortgage check every month is like a living hell I want a motorcycle and penile implants I
00:47:26Want out of this? What about your wife ex-wife?
00:47:30What about your kids ex-kids? I don't think it works that way. Mr. Rowe
00:47:36I see you've been to another lawyer a few lawyers. I admit it
00:47:40I I was trying to find someone cheaper, but those guys don't turn me down on moral grounds. Can you believe that shit moral?
00:47:47That's when I knew if you want the best you got to pay for it you
00:47:52so
00:47:53What do you say?
00:47:55Oops, I break the father
00:47:57I
00:48:10Remember don't start the video conference. I'm sitting
00:48:14You know Mary is a woman too
00:48:17Kind of she might actually understand that you are with parasites
00:48:23Mm-hmm
00:48:25Not losing my job because Curtis's sperm didn't know what to do when they hit rubber
00:48:29Listen, you just have to stop treating Mary like she's some kind of super villain
00:48:35You're saying
00:48:38Hi Mary, how's Japan treating you? Okay, we can just drop the pleasantries. Am I crazy?
00:48:43Is it just the camera or does it look like you put on a few?
00:48:49It's um
00:48:53It's glandular, all right, let's just take a look
00:48:57You don't get the graphs that I emailed you
00:49:13These rolly chairs are so fun
00:49:20My back is really
00:49:23Do do
00:49:28Angela yes, I think I know what's going on
00:49:33You do
00:49:34Yes, I think I do and it is okay. It is yes
00:49:41Believe it or not. I used to do a lot of drugs
00:49:45There was a night back in 89 where I did so much PCP I could have choked an antelope
00:49:52But I got over it. I overcame it and so can you
00:49:57You think I'm on drugs? Nothing to be ashamed of the first step is to stand up and
00:50:04Admit that you have a problem Mary
00:50:07I'm sorry. I can't do this. I'm not on drugs. I'm
00:50:11I'm pregnant
00:50:13Pregnant, uh-uh vice president
00:50:22Why don't you just tell your boss you're pregnant
00:50:25You should fire me letter then Curtis can sue them for discrimination. He might be an asshole, but he is an excellent lawyer
00:50:33How do I look?
00:50:39Do you want the real answer or the girlfriend answer
00:50:44Girlfriend first and then real you look beautiful. You can't can't even tell you're pregnant
00:50:52Okay, no real you look like a fat candy cane shit
00:51:05I give up nothing fits
00:51:08Jesus your head is enormous. You know, I can't hide it from my boss anymore. She's gonna know. Oh
00:51:14Onto the bench
00:51:19What does Curtis say he hasn't said a word to me
00:51:24Let me probably never will
00:51:26Fucking hormones. I tell you
00:51:29Is everything all right? Yeah. Um, she's pregnant and her husband is cheating on her
00:51:34You know what I think you need just step it up
00:51:52Oh
00:51:54Curtis
00:51:56I
00:51:58I
00:52:00I
00:52:02I
00:52:04I
00:52:06I
00:52:08I
00:52:10I
00:52:12I
00:52:14I
00:52:16I
00:52:18I
00:52:20I
00:52:22I
00:52:24I
00:52:26I
00:52:28I
00:52:30I
00:52:32I
00:52:36I
00:52:38I
00:52:40I
00:52:42I
00:52:44I
00:52:46I
00:52:48I
00:52:50I
00:52:52I
00:52:54I
00:52:56I
00:52:58I
00:53:00I
00:53:02I
00:53:04I
00:53:06I
00:53:08I
00:53:10I
00:53:12I
00:53:14I
00:53:16I
00:53:18I
00:53:20I
00:53:22I
00:53:24I
00:53:26I
00:53:28I
00:53:30I
00:53:32I
00:53:34I
00:53:36I
00:53:38I
00:53:40I
00:53:42I
00:53:44I
00:53:46I
00:53:48I
00:53:50I
00:53:52I
00:53:54I
00:53:56I
00:53:58I
00:54:00I
00:54:02I
00:54:04I
00:54:06I
00:54:08I
00:54:10I
00:54:12I
00:54:14I
00:54:16I
00:54:18I
00:54:20I
00:54:22I
00:54:24I
00:54:26I
00:54:28I
00:54:30I
00:54:32I
00:54:34I
00:54:36I
00:54:38I
00:54:40I
00:54:42I
00:54:44I
00:54:46I
00:54:48I
00:54:50I
00:54:52I
00:54:54I
00:54:56I
00:54:58I
00:55:00I
00:55:02I
00:55:04I
00:55:06I
00:55:08I
00:55:10I
00:55:12I
00:55:14I
00:55:16I
00:55:18I
00:55:20I
00:55:22I
00:55:24I
00:55:26I
00:55:28I
00:55:30I
00:55:32I
00:55:34I
00:55:36I
00:55:38I
00:55:40I
00:55:42I
00:55:44I
00:55:46I
00:55:48I
00:55:50I
00:55:52I
00:55:54I
00:55:56I
00:55:58I
00:56:00I
00:56:02I
00:56:04I
00:56:06I
00:56:08I
00:56:10I
00:56:12I
00:56:14I
00:56:16I
00:56:18I
00:56:20I
00:56:22I
00:56:24I
00:56:26I
00:56:28I
00:56:30I
00:56:32I
00:56:34I
00:56:36I
00:56:38I
00:56:40I
00:56:42I
00:56:44I
00:56:46I
00:56:48I
00:56:50I
00:56:52I
00:56:54I
00:56:56I
00:56:58I
00:57:00I
00:57:02I
00:57:04I
00:57:06I
00:57:08I
00:57:10I
00:57:12I
00:57:14I
00:57:16I
00:57:18I
00:57:20I
00:57:22I
00:57:24I
00:57:26I
00:57:28I
00:57:30I
00:57:32I
00:57:34I
00:57:36I
00:57:38I
00:57:40I
00:57:42I
00:57:44I
00:57:46I
00:57:48I
00:57:50I
00:57:52I
00:57:54I
00:57:56I
00:57:58I
00:58:00I
00:58:02I
00:58:04I
00:58:06I
00:58:08I
00:58:10I
00:58:12I
00:58:14I
00:58:16I
00:58:18I
00:58:20I
00:58:22I
00:58:24I
00:58:26I
00:58:28I
00:58:30I
00:58:32I
00:58:34I
00:58:36I
00:58:38I
00:58:40I
00:58:42I
00:58:44I
00:58:46I
00:58:48I
00:58:50I
00:58:52I
00:58:54I
00:58:56I
00:58:58I
00:59:00I
00:59:02I
00:59:04I
00:59:06I
00:59:08I
00:59:10I
00:59:12I
00:59:14I
00:59:16I
00:59:18I
00:59:20I
00:59:22I
00:59:24I
00:59:26I
00:59:28I
00:59:30I
00:59:32I
00:59:34I
00:59:36I
00:59:38I
00:59:40I
00:59:42I
00:59:44I
00:59:46I
00:59:48I
00:59:50I
00:59:52I
00:59:54I
00:59:56I
00:59:58I
01:00:00I
01:00:02I
01:00:04I
01:00:06I
01:00:08I
01:00:10I
01:00:12I
01:00:14I
01:00:16I
01:00:18I
01:00:20I
01:00:22I
01:00:24I
01:00:26I
01:00:28I
01:00:30I
01:00:32I
01:00:34I
01:00:36I
01:00:38I
01:00:40I
01:00:42I
01:00:44I
01:00:46I
01:00:48I
01:00:50I
01:00:52I
01:00:54I
01:00:56I
01:00:58I
01:01:00I
01:01:02I
01:01:04I
01:01:06I
01:01:08I
01:01:10I
01:01:12I
01:01:14I
01:01:16I
01:01:18I
01:01:20I
01:01:22I
01:01:24I
01:01:26I
01:01:28I
01:01:30I
01:01:32I
01:01:34I
01:01:36I
01:01:38I
01:01:40I
01:01:42I
01:01:44I
01:01:46I
01:01:48I
01:01:50I
01:01:52I
01:01:54I
01:01:56I
01:01:58I
01:02:00I
01:02:02I
01:02:04I
01:02:06I
01:02:08I
01:02:10I
01:02:12I
01:02:14I
01:02:16I
01:02:18I
01:02:20I
01:02:22I
01:02:24I
01:02:26I
01:02:28I
01:02:30I
01:02:32I
01:02:34I
01:02:36I
01:02:38I
01:02:40I
01:02:42I
01:02:44I
01:02:46I
01:02:48I
01:02:50I
01:02:52I
01:02:54I
01:02:56I
01:02:58I
01:03:00I
01:03:02I
01:03:04I
01:03:06I
01:03:08I
01:03:10I
01:03:12I
01:03:14I
01:03:16I
01:03:18I
01:03:20I
01:03:22I
01:03:24I
01:03:26I
01:03:28I
01:03:30I
01:03:32I
01:03:34I
01:03:36I
01:03:38I
01:03:40I
01:03:42I
01:03:44I
01:03:46I
01:03:48I
01:03:50I
01:03:52I
01:03:54I
01:03:56I
01:03:58I
01:04:00I
01:04:02I
01:04:04I
01:04:06I
01:04:08I
01:04:10I
01:04:12I
01:04:14I
01:04:16I
01:04:18I
01:04:20I
01:04:22I
01:04:24I
01:04:26I
01:04:28I
01:04:30I
01:04:32I
01:04:34I
01:04:36I
01:04:38I
01:04:40I
01:04:42I
01:04:44I
01:04:46I
01:04:48I
01:04:50I
01:04:52I
01:04:54I
01:04:56I
01:04:58I
01:05:00I
01:05:02I
01:05:04I
01:05:06I
01:05:08I
01:05:10I
01:05:12I
01:05:14I
01:05:16I
01:05:18I
01:05:20I
01:05:22I
01:05:24I
01:05:26I
01:05:28I
01:05:30I
01:05:32I
01:05:34I
01:05:36I
01:05:38I
01:05:40I
01:05:42I
01:05:44I
01:05:46I
01:05:48I
01:05:50I
01:05:52I
01:05:54I
01:05:56I
01:05:58I
01:06:00I
01:06:02I
01:06:04I
01:06:06I
01:06:08I
01:06:10I
01:06:12I
01:06:14I
01:06:16I
01:06:18I
01:06:20I
01:06:22I
01:06:24I
01:06:26I
01:06:28I
01:06:30I
01:06:32I
01:06:34I
01:06:36I
01:06:38I
01:06:40I
01:06:42I
01:06:44I
01:06:46I
01:06:48I
01:06:50I
01:06:52I
01:06:54I
01:06:56I
01:06:58I
01:07:00I
01:07:02I
01:07:04I
01:07:06I
01:07:08I
01:07:10I
01:07:12I
01:07:14I
01:07:16I
01:07:18I
01:07:20I
01:07:22I
01:07:24I
01:07:26I
01:07:28I
01:07:30I
01:07:32I
01:07:34I
01:07:36I
01:07:38I
01:07:40I
01:07:42I
01:07:44I
01:07:46I
01:07:48I
01:07:50I
01:07:52I
01:07:54I
01:07:56I
01:07:58I
01:08:00I
01:08:02I
01:08:04I
01:08:06I
01:08:08I
01:08:10I
01:08:12I
01:08:14I
01:08:16I
01:08:18I
01:08:20I
01:08:22I
01:08:24I
01:08:26I
01:08:28I
01:08:30I
01:08:32I
01:08:34I
01:08:36I
01:08:38I
01:08:40I
01:08:42I
01:08:44I
01:08:46I
01:08:48I
01:08:50I
01:08:52I
01:08:54I
01:08:56I
01:08:58I
01:09:00I
01:09:02I
01:09:04I
01:09:06I
01:09:08I
01:09:10I
01:09:12I
01:09:14I
01:09:16I
01:09:18I
01:09:20I
01:09:22I
01:09:24I
01:09:26I
01:09:28I
01:09:30I
01:09:32I
01:09:34I
01:09:36I
01:09:38I
01:09:40I
01:09:42I
01:09:44I
01:09:46I
01:09:48I
01:09:50I
01:09:52I
01:09:54I
01:09:56I
01:09:58I
01:10:00I
01:10:02I
01:10:04I
01:10:06I
01:10:08I
01:10:10I
01:10:12I
01:10:14I
01:10:16I
01:10:18I
01:10:20I
01:10:22I
01:10:24I
01:10:26I
01:10:28I
01:10:30I
01:10:32I
01:10:34I
01:10:36I
01:10:38I
01:10:40I
01:10:42I
01:10:44I
01:10:46I
01:10:48I
01:10:50I
01:10:52I
01:10:54I
01:10:56I
01:10:58I
01:11:00I
01:11:02I
01:11:04I
01:11:06I
01:11:08I
01:11:10I
01:11:12I
01:11:14I
01:11:16I
01:11:18I
01:11:20I
01:11:22I
01:11:24I
01:11:26I
01:11:28I
01:11:30I
01:11:32I
01:11:34I
01:11:36I
01:11:38I
01:11:40I
01:11:42I
01:11:44I
01:11:46I
01:11:48I
01:11:50I
01:11:52I
01:11:54I
01:11:56I
01:11:58I
01:12:00I
01:12:02I
01:12:04I
01:12:06I
01:12:08I
01:12:10I
01:12:12I
01:12:14I
01:12:16I
01:12:18I
01:12:20I
01:12:22I
01:12:24I
01:12:26I
01:12:28I
01:12:30I
01:12:32I
01:12:34I
01:12:36I
01:12:38I
01:12:40I
01:12:42I
01:12:44I
01:12:46I
01:12:48I
01:12:50I
01:12:52I
01:12:54I
01:12:56I
01:12:58I
01:13:00I
01:13:02I
01:13:04I
01:13:06I
01:13:08I
01:13:10I
01:13:12I
01:13:14I
01:13:16I
01:13:18I
01:13:20I
01:13:22I
01:13:24I
01:13:26I
01:13:28I
01:13:30I
01:13:32I
01:13:34I
01:13:36I
01:13:38I
01:13:40I
01:13:42I
01:13:44I
01:13:46I
01:13:48I
01:13:50I
01:13:52I
01:13:54I
01:13:56I
01:13:58I
01:14:00I
01:14:02I
01:14:04I
01:14:06I
01:14:08I
01:14:10I
01:14:12I
01:14:14I
01:14:16I
01:14:18I
01:14:20I
01:14:22I
01:14:24I
01:14:26I
01:14:28I
01:14:30I
01:14:32I
01:14:34I
01:14:36I
01:14:38I
01:14:42I
01:14:44I
01:14:46I
01:14:48I
01:14:50I
01:14:52I
01:14:54I
01:14:56I
01:14:58I
01:15:00I
01:15:02I
01:15:04I
01:15:06I
01:15:08I
01:15:10I
01:15:12I
01:15:14I
01:15:16I
01:15:18I
01:15:20I
01:15:22I
01:15:24I
01:15:26I
01:15:28I
01:15:30I
01:15:32I
01:15:34I
01:15:36I
01:15:38I
01:15:40I
01:15:42I
01:15:44I
01:15:46I
01:15:48I
01:15:50I
01:15:52I
01:15:54I
01:15:56I
01:15:58I
01:16:00I
01:16:02I
01:16:04I
01:16:06I
01:16:08I
01:16:10I
01:16:12I
01:16:14I
01:16:16I
01:16:18I
01:16:20I
01:16:22I
01:16:24I
01:16:26I
01:16:28I
01:16:30I
01:16:32I
01:16:34I
01:16:36I
01:16:38I
01:16:40I
01:16:42I
01:16:44I
01:16:46I
01:16:48I
01:16:50I
01:16:52I
01:16:54I
01:16:56I
01:16:58I
01:17:00I
01:17:02I
01:17:04I
01:17:06I
01:17:08I
01:17:10I
01:17:12I
01:17:14I
01:17:16I
01:17:18I
01:17:20I
01:17:22I
01:17:24I
01:17:26I
01:17:28I
01:17:30I
01:17:32I
01:17:34I
01:17:36I
01:17:38I
01:17:40I
01:17:42I
01:17:44I
01:17:46I
01:17:48I
01:17:50I
01:17:52I
01:17:54I
01:17:56I
01:17:58I
01:18:00I
01:18:02I
01:18:04I
01:18:06I
01:18:08I
01:18:10I
01:18:12I
01:18:14I
01:18:16I
01:18:18I
01:18:20I
01:18:22I
01:18:24I
01:18:26I
01:18:28I
01:18:30I
01:18:32I
01:18:34I
01:18:36I
01:18:38I
01:18:40I
01:18:42I
01:18:44I
01:18:46I
01:18:48I
01:18:50I
01:18:52I
01:18:54I
01:18:56I
01:18:58I
01:19:00I
01:19:02I