Jon prepares a mac & cheese with gruyère, Swiss, caramelized onions, and more!
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00:00Frankie, we're going to make a delightful fall macaroni and cheese with caramelized onions today on Boxed Mac!
00:18So I've got a treat in store for us today, Rooney. I have crafted a recipe,
00:22a fall-themed recipe, based on the idea of caramelized onions. Remember we had recently
00:26from the wonderful Cabot Company a caramelized onion mac and that kind of inspired me a little
00:30bit to really dive into the idea of a fall caramelized macaroni and cheese with gruyere
00:37as the primary cheese. Gruyere and Swiss. What made you choose gruyere? When I was thinking
00:42through the idea, I was like, all right, French onion soup. If you're gonna make a French onion
00:45soup, what do you have in a French onion soup? You have the French onions and you put the gruyere
00:48on top and then you have it together and that's a really nice combination. And then Swiss is
00:51another cheese that's also used sometimes instead of or with gruyere as the topping for it. And then
00:56I wanted to throw in a little cheddar just because. Because you want to make sure it tastes
00:59like cheese at the end. Yeah. Is this your recipe? This is my recipe. I've never made it before,
01:03it could be a total disaster. And you're not afraid of bacon? No. Ah, bacon! It can have an
01:08overwhelming flavor and it can also really kind of mess with your texture. My texture! It's not
01:13going to go in the mac, but it's going to be the topper. I just want it to be like a little initial
01:18flavor on top. Are you baking this motherf*****? I'm not sure if you're asking me if I'm going to
01:23bake the bacon or if I'm going to bacon it. Are you going to bake the mac and cheese? No,
01:28no, absolutely not. We don't, we're not for bacon around here. No. Every time on this show we've
01:32done a baked mac and cheese, it was better before I put it into the oven. Look, I've got a lot of
01:36cheese here that needs a lot of grating. I would give that an A plus. Okay. Minus. Yeah, how about
01:43this? I think I grated all the cheese. That was a great joke. How about this one? We're here,
01:49get used to it. Gender Greer. Let me talk a little bit about what I got here first,
01:54the ingredients and to go into the ingredient hole, if I might. Don't touch it. Oh, it's too
01:58hot to touch. Don't touch the ingredient hole. I've got some cayenne, some slow smoked applewood
02:05bacon. I've never tried this before, but I wanted something a little apple-y like applewood and a
02:09smoked flavor to kind of make that fall go. I have made these caramelized onions last night. I
02:14couldn't make them on the show because it takes about 45 minutes to make caramelized onions.
02:17These are Vidalia onions that I caramelized down with a little bit of salt, some butter,
02:21and a little bit of olive oil. We've got gris poupon mustard. We've got the Greer. We've got
02:26the Swiss. I've got some Parmesan here as well. Some Parmesan Romano, Kate's butter for the butter,
02:31fresh nutmeg. Wow. I don't think I've ever seen in the nut form in a container like this. You've
02:35never seen a whole nutmeg before. I wouldn't have bought a whole nutmeg except that it was
02:39on super sale. I just thought that's really cool to like grate our own fresh nutmeg. Supposedly
02:43it's a lot better than pre-ground stuff. Is it really? We'll see. Got some fall-shaped pasta
02:47here. Have we ever done this on the show before? We did that year that we did the
02:50Mac Baking Championship. Okay, but it's back again. And I've also got some smoked paprika
02:54here as well. So I'm pretty excited to get going. How's Zach doing in there?
02:59Fine. So Frankie, I'm gonna have you do Parmesan. I have a Halloween-y topic of discussion. I like
03:04to play retro video games. Do you? You ever played these before? You Sonic the Hedgehogs,
03:08you Super Mario's, you Contra's. And around this time of year, you know, I got a million ways to
03:13play them. Yep. And there's a million games. Sure. I always feel like there's games I haven't
03:17played probably. And so around this time of year, I like to look into YouTube. What are some horror
03:21retro games? And there was a creator last year who did giant compilations of all of them. NES,
03:28Famicom, and Super Nintendo. There were hundreds. Well, the only way that there's hundreds is if you
03:33have a little bit of a category error. I believe he included too many games simply because they
03:37had monsters in them, simply because they had like aliens. They were Halloween games. That's
03:42what he called them. Well, he called them 16-bit horror titles for Halloween. If I try to think of
03:4616-bit horror titles, I can think of a couple. Ghouls and Goblins and like... Adam's Family.
03:51Adam's Family, Beetlejuice for NES. You know, there's definitely some. Chiller for NES, which
03:55was the absolutely gruesome light gun game that started in the arcade. I'd never seen it before
04:00until I went to Fun Spot last year. I was having to avert Gloria's eyes. Really? It was that bad?
04:05Yeah. It was from like 86. What system? It was arcade initially and it came to NES. It's like
04:09a bunch of like tortured dying people. In a dungeon, right? In a dungeon, yeah. But anyway,
04:13my point is this. I think that Alien, Ridley Scott's Alien, confused the issue. Yes, that is
04:19a horror movie. Absolutely. And I think like maybe B-movie horror, B-movie sci-fi can be Halloween-y,
04:24but you know, I wouldn't call Men in Black Halloween. No. Well, is the Adam Family franchise
04:29Halloween? Yes. But they're not horror. True, but they're gothic, which is much more Halloween-y
04:34than sci-fi. Yeah. I mean, I've gotten pushback before for calling Adam's Family a Halloween movie.
04:40Really? Beetlejuice, Adam's Family, firmly Halloween movie. Sure. But like Ghostbusters,
04:44I don't think so. You don't think it's a Halloween movie? I don't think so. Meanwhile, I'm starting
04:48to rue over here. I've got two sticks of butter, so you know it's going to be good. Two sticks of
04:53Kate's fine butter. My Halloween viewing this year will definitely include the Halloween episode of
04:58Ted. Really? I've seen some episodes from that show and they were great. Hilarious. Did you
05:02like the movies? I thought the movies were okay, but I thought that the TV show was fantastic. The
05:07sister wanted to go to a party and needed a designated driver, so Ted was the designated
05:11driver. He dresses up like an Ewok. He ends up getting wasted at the party. She dressed up like
05:15Michelle Pfeiffer's Catwoman, which is a quick way to my heart. And meanwhile, Ted's best friend,
05:19you know, the teen version of Mark Wahlberg, he has to stay by himself and the mom brings over
05:24one of her friend's sons, who turns out to be about 39 years old. And he's like a very,
05:31very weird person. It takes place in the 90s? Yeah, and they have a really good Christmas
05:35episode too, but we won't talk about that at this moment. No. They have a lovely floor model,
05:39Sony. Oh, true. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Did you have a floor model as a kid? No, we always had it on
05:44the same TV stand that's still over my father's house today, where his TV is. So we wanted to go
05:48see Beetlejuice 2, but we really wanted to go with Glow, and it seemed like it would be appropriate,
05:52and ultimately we did. But we wanted to show her the first one first, and it can be hard to
05:56introduce children to kind of oldish movies. Yes. This is how she got interested in it. She was
06:01like, can we go get the projector? Because we have a projector that we do for outdoor movies. Yeah.
06:05She's like, can we project it on the wall and watch it that way? And we had ourselves a little
06:08movie theater Beetlejuice time. That sounds lovely. And she loved it so much that we ran
06:13out right afterwards and saw Beetlejuice 2. That is amazing. Yeah. I got some applewood
06:17bacon that's going in the air fryer. I remember when I was a kid, I saw it when it came out,
06:20which I think was a slightly not great decision on my parents' behalf. It was back when the F word
06:25was in a PG movie. Yeah. Nice f***ing model honk honk. Nice f***ing model. The first time I watched
06:31it, everything was going fine until nice f***ing tree or whatever the line is. Model. Nice f***ing
06:36model. And he honks his crotch. I distinctly remember the look on my father's face. Turn off
06:41this crotch honking movie. This like entered my psyche, this whole idea of like life after death.
06:48I would write these like little books of like, you know, the guide to the undead and give them
06:51to my friends and my friends' mothers became very concerned about it. Really? Yeah. It became
06:55macabre. How many gothic kids do you think that movie alone through the depiction of Lydia Dietz
07:02created? I myself am strange and unusual. Got a half cup of flour here, EJ, putting it in with
07:08the butter. I just love that with Beetlejuice, they thought, you know what, this would make a
07:12good children's cartoon. Yeah. This ghoul that tries to like force marry. After the success of
07:17Beetlejuice, you had Little Monsters with Howie Mandel and you had Drop Dead Fred. There was kind
07:22of a period there of like, you know, your creepy, insane mascot. And he's back, baby. The juice is
07:27loose. When you get into these ruts, your performance becomes very low. At that time,
07:31you want to rotate and do... I've been doing that. You have been? Yeah. Just offering tips. You're
07:35doing awesome. Thank you. Looks good. Let me, I'm going to sample the juice. So after watching
07:40Beetlejuice 2, what was your assessment? Because a lot of these reboots are like,
07:44I thought it had a lot of energy. It had a lot of good laughs. Michael Keaton at 73 years old.
07:48Yeah, it's kind of amazing. It's kind of incredible. You know, the plot is kind of
07:52paper thin and a little over packed with nonsense. But at the end of the day,
07:55you get yourself a Beetlejuice movie. And I think that that's a nice thing. What's the
07:59story with the father? He... We mustn't say. Oh, there was some controversy. Yeah,
08:03there was controversy. EJ, in all of your meat adventures, have you ever smoked bacon before?
08:08You know, I haven't. Actually, my father-in-law, he gets pork belly from like, just like a meat
08:14outlay. And he does smoke it and dry it so that you can actually eat it raw. Really? It's like
08:20cured meat. If you want beans for my dad, I use some of his bacon. I'm not a huge fan of general
08:25bacon. Here's a litmus test. If you're out to breakfast at a diner, you have a choice,
08:30bacon, sausage, or home fries on the side. Sausage. I'm going sausage. Yeah. Oh,
08:36it's almost Christmassy. I heard that Denny's had some kind of breakfast tie-in with Beetlejuice.
08:40Some sort of Beetlejuice breakfast you can get. I heard that there was a total missed opportunity
08:44in that movie. You know, at the end of Beetlejuice 1, he's back, he's got the number,
08:47and it would have been amazing. If he was still waiting. Yeah, if he was still waiting. The first
08:51thing I thought when I saw the movie was, why wouldn't they have done that? Yeah, it's so like,
08:55it's so obvious and it would have been so funny. That looks like a perfect amount of that cheese,
08:58Frankie. I think you're all set. So you're not concerned that mixing all these cheeses together
09:02will... It's all going in the same basic bin. Yeah, but don't you think the individual flavors
09:06of each delicious cheese will be lost when it's... It's a witch's brew. Tale of a rat,
09:11call in the spirits. Here, try a little bit of this one on top, Frankie. Just cheddar. This
09:15is a caramelized onion cheddar. Dang, dude. It's so good. I thought to reinforce my caramelized
09:20onion flavor with a caramelized onion cheddar. I think you're going to make something special here.
09:23I wouldn't go easy on the grape poupon. Is now a good time for me to try a Halloween treat?
09:28Oh, absolutely. What we have here is a signature cookie from the Donut Factory. It's got eyeballs.
09:34It's got a little bit of Oreo. Did it have a signature name? A good pun? Monster cookie.
09:38Here's the deal. If anybody watches my and EJ's podcast, they would know that last year we went
09:43to this place called the Donut Factory that has all these signature donuts and they served me
09:47an insane shake that took like 30 minutes and held up the line out the door. It was a big problem.
09:53But they just opened a satellite store in Dartmouth and they just are selling things
09:58that don't need to be made. That don't take 30 minutes. Cookies and signature donuts and this
10:01sort of thing. Tastes like a cookie. After all that hype up, it's a cookie. I just want a little piece.
10:07I have a cookie. A munchie monster cookie. It's very blue. Too blue to consume? No, it's a little too
10:14blue for me to consume. Yeah, it tastes like a decent cookie. Yeah, maybe a little too thick.
10:18Yeah, it looks like a Tim Burton creation. Yeah, it does. So I don't know exactly what the movie
10:23would be about, but I've drawn some sketches I'd like to show you. Maybe he's sort of like
10:28he's a cookie that didn't fit in with the other children in the cookie class.
10:32And so he sort of stayed in the back of the bakery. And then one day another shy girl
10:38cookie comes up to him and says, I'm actually from the undead cookie lands. And he says,
10:43oh, I've always read about those. Michael Keaton says my agent connected us. I met with him. I
10:47liked him. I liked Tim Burton. I wanted to work with him. But I got to tell you, I have no idea
10:51what the hell he was talking about. I don't know what he wanted to make. He just showed me sketches
10:57of sad people and people that were zombies and stuff. And Danny Elfman says the same. He's like,
11:02well, normally Tim starts the process by showing up with sketches. And then I start writing music
11:06to the sketches. What do you think of some of his more recent ones, like the Corpse Bride?
11:11I'm not a fan, but I went to Spirit Halloween recently and they had a huge Corpse Bride
11:16animatronic display. And I was like, has this thing endured? I remember it being a beautiful
11:20film, but it didn't have a whole lot of gravitas to it. It's because we didn't write a script.
11:24We just drew sketches and then wrote music to the sketches.
11:29Sleepy Hollow.
11:29I like that movie. Nina loves that movie.
11:32I think it's beautifully stylized for sure.
11:34At this point, any property that should have been connected with Tim Burton probably has been.
11:39Wednesday, Sleepy Hollow, Raw Doll with James and the Giant Peach and Charlie and the Chocolate
11:43Factory, Batman, Ed Wood, that pretty much covers all your B-movie sci-fi.
11:48Alice in Wonderland, Sweeney Todd.
11:50I think that The Nightmare Before Christmas was a beautiful movie.
11:53I'm sick of seeing it being advertised.
11:55I was sick of it being advertised about 20 years ago and I'm back to not caring.
12:00Frankie, would you like to try a little Suisse? This is real Swiss.
12:03Favorite treehouse of horror, go.
12:05Oh God, the one with the 3D Homer.
12:07I think that's the one with mascots.
12:09Another one of my favorite segments was where Bart turns into a fly
12:12and where Homer travels through time with the toaster.
12:14What about the early one, like Monkey's Claw?
12:16That's great too though. That has an early Simpsons feel.
12:19Man's smart.
12:20A woman is smarter.
12:22I so wanted a full-length version of that track and there is no full-length version of that track.
12:26Man's smart.
12:27A woman is...
12:28Man, this thing's really getting out of hand.
12:31I really like Lisa making her own civilization out of the tooth.
12:35Yeah, I remember that one.
12:35I had to explain to Gloria recently why it was really funny when Homer
12:39stuck the steak through Burns' crotch.
12:42Dad, that's his crotch.
12:44And then we went over, we actually looked at the,
12:45you know what's BS episode of Sin of Massacre.
12:48James did a video some years ago that was like,
12:50wait a minute, if you really add up all of the ways you can kill a vampire,
12:53there's too many ways to kill a vampire.
12:55Sunlight, garlic.
12:56You don't even have to invite them in.
12:58I'm going to do a little fresh nutmegging over here.
13:02See you in several days.
13:04No, it's actually, it's going pretty quick.
13:05Right in the room.
13:06And you can start adding that cheese now, Matt.
13:08Now, John, if you're ever on my Plex, you look up Tiny Toon's Night Ghoulery.
13:11Oh, I'm definitely gonna.
13:13The animation is just so exquisite.
13:14Yeah.
13:14It was kind of similar to the Nightmare Gallery parody on the Simpsons.
13:18Smoke paprika.
13:19Smoke paprika.
13:20Ooh, look at that.
13:21They did the whole gremlin on the side of the plane gag.
13:23In the original Twilight, it was William Shatner.
13:25Yeah, yeah.
13:25And Plucky is talking like William Shatner the whole time.
13:28You're so right, hand bones.
13:30This craft, this beautiful ship is our lady, and we love it.
13:34So I had to explain to Gloria, like, so there was a guy.
13:37Sorry, must have been the, no, I thought I saw something out there.
13:42We have gris poupon Dijon mustard.
13:44I've got my caramelized onions here.
13:45They're just about to go into the cheese sauce.
13:47I think that that cheese sauce is just about ready to go.
13:51It tastes like the fall.
13:52It does.
13:52It's, hmm, interesting.
13:54Well, let's see how it goes.
13:55This is way too much cheese sauce.
13:58I'm not even gonna put all of it in.
13:59The bacon could come in and box out all the other flavors like an asshole.
14:03Look at that nice crumble.
14:04That's a good crumble on that bacon.
14:06Get a nice sound.
14:07Let's get some ASMR here.
14:08Hey, it's Junt.
14:10Happy Halloween.
14:11Today, we're gonna cut some bacon.
14:12You've had such a hard week.
14:15The hard week comment.
14:17That's like exactly what they say.
14:18You did so great this week.
14:20You are so underappreciated at your job.
14:22You contribute more than anyone knows, but I know about the contributions.
14:26I know how special you are.
14:28Now let's cut this f***ing bacon.
14:32So you get f***ed.
14:36That joke's not making it into the episode.
14:38Are you serving?
14:39I am.
14:39Holy s***.
14:40May I decorate yours with bacon, Frankie?
14:42Please.
14:42We didn't know what we were gonna make and Jon did this.
14:44Jon, did you know what you were doing when you started this?
14:47No.
14:47Well, today, yes.
14:48I did do some pre-meditation.
14:50You could tell by the correct that I caramelized onions for 40 minutes last night.
14:54And nothing else.
14:55Yes.
14:55I totally didn't buy $70 worth of groceries to make this macaroni and cheese.
14:58Well, this looks beautiful.
14:59I'll start off with some of that.
15:00Sure does.
15:01The green throws me off slightly.
15:02I have to remind myself it's just pasta, not veggies.
15:05Yeah, I think it's really good.
15:06I mean, Gruyere is the signature flavor, I think.
15:09Yeah.
15:09Do you think it's pretty well balanced with the caramelized onion?
15:11Oh yeah.
15:11I think those are very helpful.
15:13I think it's pretty good.
15:13It is good, but I don't think I could eat too much of it before it started to weigh me down.
15:18Yeah.
15:19Or block you up.
15:20Yeah, it's very heavy.
15:22I don't want a traffic jam in my rectum.
15:24If you really want a fright this Halloween, eat a whole pot of this mac.
15:31You like it?
15:33A few extra ingredients, I see.
15:36It's good.
15:36It's very onion-y.
15:37Onion forward.
15:38Well, I like onion.
15:39Yeah, there was too much onion.
15:40When I write the recipe for the site, I'm going to reduce the onions by maybe 40%.
15:44And I'll reduce the amount of cheese sauce, too.
15:46I have fresh pepper right here.
15:47That's a great idea, Zach.
15:49It's a two-handed operation.
15:50You hold all spin, that kind of thing?
15:53As far as fall macs go and Halloween macs, I think this is right up there.
15:56Yeah.
15:57I mean, this was you pretty much just leaning into the things you would want to see at a mac.
16:01All right.
16:01Happy Halloween.
16:02Happy Halloween.
16:10Bye.