Avanti Nagral and her grandmother talked about pleasure, consent, consequence and much more in this candid chat.
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00:00So, concept and consequence, both you have to take into consideration.
00:05When it comes to sex, right, obviously some people do sex for babies,
00:09but some people do it for pleasure, right?
00:12No, mostly it is for pleasure.
00:15Outcome is baby.
00:19Yes, Aashi, high five.
00:30Actually, when Amanthi told me that I have to talk to you again, I was a bit reluctant.
00:44And when she told me the subject, then I thought we should do it because sex is such a thing.
00:54Nobody wants to talk openly.
00:56Yes.
00:57Being a medical person and an elderly person, I thought I can do justice to the subject.
01:06No, thank you so much for doing that.
01:15No, sometimes what happens in our society, there are two extremes.
01:20Formerly, sex, oh no, no, no, no.
01:24And now, even teenagers are all the time talking and not talking, thinking about sex.
01:32So, these are two extremes, according to me.
01:36Because sexual feelings are unique in a human being.
01:41In some animals, the sexual feelings are, sexual propagation is there,
01:46but it does not, it is seasonal and there are no feelings behind it.
01:53But in a human being, it is very unique and that's why you have to handle it.
02:01In teenage, when a person from teenage to youth, that period is very turbulent
02:09because the hormones are changing.
02:10So many changes occur in the body.
02:13Of course, puberty.
02:14But those changes should be looked at and taken with respect and restraint.
02:22Respect and restraint, yeah.
02:23Many people think that you should only have sex after marriage.
02:27What is your thought process on this?
02:31As far as possible.
02:33As far as possible, okay.
02:34And why do you say that?
02:36That it should be after marriage.
02:37Okay, okay.
02:38That's a fact.
02:40Or at least, you should be 100% sure when you have some sex with somebody
02:48that you are going to marry that person.
02:52That's my opinion.
02:53That's your opinion.
02:54It's a very special thing given to a human being.
02:59It's a special bond.
03:00I respect your opinion.
03:02My view is, you don't have to have marriage.
03:05That's my view.
03:06But personally, for me, it's important that you feel ready for it.
03:10Because as you are saying, it's not just physical.
03:13You have to be mentally ready, emotionally ready.
03:15That's right.
03:17It's not just a physical thing like a beast.
03:21Ajay, the fact is that people are having sex younger.
03:25But because we don't talk about sex, as a result, we don't talk about consent.
03:32Consent means that both people should be...
03:35Yeah, agreed.
03:36So, what is your thought?
03:38Consent is the first thing.
03:42Yes, consent is the first thing.
03:44Okay.
03:45But even after that, you have to think about the consequences also.
03:50Yeah.
03:50Yeah.
03:51So, consent and consequence, both you have to take into consideration.
03:56Yes.
03:56So, when we're talking about consent,
03:59don't know, both men, women or whoever the partners are, both of them should consent.
04:04Of course.
04:06But Ajay, what happens is that a lot of men feel that when they're married,
04:11then they have a right on their body.
04:15Yeah.
04:15No, that should not be the case.
04:17It is a mutual thing.
04:18When it comes to sex, right?
04:20Obviously, some people do sex for babies.
04:23But some people do it for pleasure, right?
04:25No, mostly it is for pleasure.
04:29Outcome is baby.
04:32Yes, Ajay, high five.
04:33So, what are the kinds of contraceptives out there?
04:38Available.
04:39Male or female?
04:41For male, very few are there.
04:43Yeah.
04:44Most of them are for the female.
04:46True.
04:47But that is nature.
04:48That is nature.
04:48We have to accept that.
04:50We have to accept that.
04:51Some boys think that because of the condom, their pleasure reduces.
04:56Is that true?
04:57I don't think so.
04:58I cannot say.
05:01So many things are there that give you pleasure.
05:03Yeah.
05:04But you have to balance the feeling of pleasure and the outcome also.
05:11Yeah, and the safety.
05:13You can't do only pleasure, no?
05:17So, you have to balance that.
05:19Maybe a little less feeling is there.
05:21It's okay.
05:22According to you, it's important to remember the consent, consequences, safety, and respect.
05:28Yeah.
05:29Respect is key.
05:30Respect is number one.
05:32And mutual consent.
05:34Mutual consent.
05:35Not only one man's consent.
05:38What would you say to somebody who is...
05:41Because you and I, in this conversation, we said the words sex, condom, penis, vagina.
05:48What do people say when they go to the chemist?
05:50I want to get a condom.
05:52Mine?
05:52Vagina.
05:54Sex.
05:55So, what would you say to people who still feel shame around it?
05:59They should not be so much reluctant to talk about it.