• last year
Transcript
00:00Ma'am, do you have any illegal substances on you?
00:02No. That I can explain.
00:04This is really pathetic.
00:06Well, you know what? I've been cheating on you.
00:08With who?
00:09With the mailman.
00:10Betty?
00:11With the milkman.
00:12We don't have a milkman.
00:13Hear ye, hear ye.
00:15My name is Lady Wadsworth.
00:17I built this house in 1855.
00:20What are you talking about?
00:21Sorry, what?
00:22This house was built in 1840 and it's literally right on the cover of the pamphlet.
00:26Do you even work here?
00:27What makes you so qualified?
00:29I'm a PhD in American History from Harvard.
00:32Oh.
00:34How dare you pose as me in my own house?
00:37Um, does everybody see this old-timey looking lady right now?
00:40Oh, sorry.
00:42Lady Wadsworth was the absolute classiest.
00:45Okay.
00:46I need your help and not because you're a man.
00:48Okay.
00:49Because you're a nerd.
00:50Oh.
00:51I got an old-fashioned bitch ghost.
00:53You are a disgrace.
00:54I won't have people thinking I behave like you.
00:58You're such a good drunk driver.
01:00Thanks, I know.
01:02If you insist on pretending to be me, will you allow me to teach you how to be a lady?
01:08Okay.
01:09Just please stop cock-blocking me.
01:11Cock.
01:12Blocking.
01:15Whoa.
01:16What are you, a 13-year-old boy?
01:17Those are from the 80s.
01:18It's my favorite era of D.
01:21A lady should excuse herself, actually.
01:24Did you just come into my room to fart?
01:26It wasn't you.
01:28There is a worldwide web of information.
01:30They call it the internet.
01:32Son, this property has been in our family for years.
01:37Your performance the last few weeks.
01:38What about it?
01:39Over here, we have...
01:41Sorry.
01:42Hasn't been good.
01:43He's a total dick.
01:44You and that word, dick.
01:46It's a shortened version of Richard.
01:48Yes, I have known many, many dicks in my lifetime.
01:52You're a smart, confident woman who could do anything she set her mind to.
01:57You're right.
01:58I could do anything you set my mind to.
02:01Close enough.
02:07Whenever I would have guests over, I would offer them tea and sex.
02:11Snacks.
02:12Snacks.
02:14He does not look well.
02:15No, he's just a nerd.
02:17That's what they look like.
02:18Nerd.