Aired (December 28, 2024): Inamin ni Ivan LIVE na LIVE sa telebisyon na siya ay parte ng LGBTQ+ community. Panoorin ang video. #GMANetwork
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Madlang Kapuso, join the FUNanghalian with #ItsShowtime family. Watch the latest episode of 'It's Showtime' hosted by Vice Ganda, Anne Curtis, Vhong Navarro, Karylle, Jhong Hilario, Amy Perez, Kim Chui, Jugs & Teddy, MC & Lassy, Ogie Alcasid, Darren, Jackie, Cianne, Ryan Bang, and Ion Perez.
Monday to Saturday, 12NN on GMA Network. #ItsShowtime #MadlangKapuso
For more It's Showtime Full Episodes, click the link below:
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FunTranscript
00:00So, why do you need to prove that you're a man?
00:03Why do you need to have a girlfriend to prove that you're a man?
00:07Maybe because when I was in high school, I wasn't that masculine.
00:13So, I was always like this.
00:16The typical bully in high school.
00:19From what I read in your story, you had a girlfriend
00:25so that they wouldn't think that you're gay.
00:28Yes.
00:29There.
00:31That was your reason at first.
00:35The second time, it was like that again.
00:37No.
00:38My real reason was when I was given a chance.
00:42Because I was really interested in her back then.
00:45In college.
00:48Interested in what?
00:50Because I had a soft heart for her.
00:55I was just happy.
00:57I wasn't stressed.
01:00When I was with her, we were just happy.
01:04So, I really appreciated that.
01:07So, I thought that if I gave her that chance,
01:12maybe I would be happy too.
01:14I would know, I would realize, I would learn what it really means.
01:18Right. You wanted to try because you wanted to have a girlfriend.
01:21Yes. That time.
01:23Why do you need to have a girlfriend?
01:27Because when you have a partner, it feels good
01:33because you can say what's on your mind
01:38or anything that stresses you out in life.
01:41Then, there's a companion.
01:43I was still young, but now I have one.
01:45Don't you have friends?
01:48I'm not that friendly.
01:52Because it all roots down to childhood.
01:56It's not that beautiful.
01:58I wasn't raised in a good childhood.
02:01So, I found a means to have a companion.
02:06There are many reasons why people fall in love.
02:09Why they want to have a girlfriend or a boyfriend.
02:12One, because they fell in love with the person.
02:14Yes. They love them.
02:15Two, they are just lonely.
02:17And they're scared to be lonely.
02:19Yes.
02:20Three, they're alone and they're scared to be alone.
02:23Yes.
02:26So, you weren't happy during those times?
02:28No. I was lonely and I was alone.
02:31Who invited you to have a girlfriend?
02:33We can't recall.
02:35I hope you knew before you came here.
02:37You know how to tell a story.
02:39Maybe you were so happy that time.
02:42It was like, is it our turn?
02:44We were holding hands.
02:46You can't forget that.
02:48It was magical.
02:50Yes.
02:51That moment.
02:53You stopped there.
02:55It was so magical and memorable.
02:57Yes. I know, right?
03:02I know, right?
03:05What can you tell us about what you did?
03:09Why?
03:10You can tell us.
03:11We didn't have a formal relationship.
03:13So, we can't recall that he asked us.
03:17But what happened on August 1, 2014,
03:237.58 p.m.
03:27Where were you?
03:28Under the LRT.
03:29That's right.
03:31You talked about it.
03:34Someone must have initiated the talk.
03:37Even if it was casual.
03:39Very through the rain, said Mariah Carey.
03:42Especially, Ivan.
03:44I can recall now.
03:46Where, Ivan?
03:47That's right.
03:49It happened so fast.
03:51We were on our way home from Cavite.
03:54I asked him,
03:55Do you want us?
03:58You asked him, Ivan.
04:01He asked casually.
04:03Do you want us?
04:05What about you?
04:08For the first time, I held his hand.
04:13He said it so fast.
04:15Do you want us?
04:17You couldn't speak.
04:18You held his hand.
04:19Yes.
04:20What did you do to his hand?
04:23Holding hands.
04:26Fingers intertwined.
04:32There were a lot of people.
04:34It was like no one was there.
04:36No one was there.
04:40And then?
04:42We went home.
04:43No one was there.
04:44Why did you go home?
04:47You were waiting for him.
04:49Did you pray for it?
04:51Yes.
04:53I always imagined it.
04:55She imagined it.
04:56It goes to your imagination.
04:58I got married right away.
05:02She got married right away.
05:03But she's a nanny.
05:04It hurts.
05:06She invited a nanny.
05:07It happened in 2014-2015.
05:10It was nice, right?
05:11Your crush made you.
05:13Yes.
05:14It was nice.
05:16It was nice.
05:17At first, she thought it was impossible.
05:19But it happened.
05:20It's true.
05:22It's nice.
05:23But...
05:26What?
05:27After a month, he broke up with me.
05:31Why?
05:34Why?
05:38During that one whole month...
05:40Maybe not whole, but...
05:41Sorry.
05:43We had a lot of arguments.
05:46A small amount of arguments.
05:48In a month, you had a lot of arguments?
05:50Yes, a lot.
05:51Because our insecurities were exposed.
05:54So, we had a lot of arguments.
05:56Like?
05:58For example, I don't want to feel like I'm useless.
06:02Or that I don't have a story.
06:06So, when there are gun-ups in our organization,
06:10I want to be included.
06:13Or everybody.
06:14For example, we drafted the bylaws of the organization.
06:19Because we're rebuilding.
06:21And then,
06:23they're already doing it.
06:26They're already creating drafts.
06:28Whereas,
06:30for me, those things should be discussed
06:33by everyone involved in the organization,
06:35not just one person.
06:36So,
06:40then, he would complain that
06:42he had to deal with a lot of different orgs.
06:45And then,
06:47I just wanted to be included.
06:49I didn't want us to discuss all of that.
06:52Because you accepted him as a whole.
06:55Did you fall in love with him?
07:00Why aren't you answering?
07:02Because...
07:03That's why I can't answer right away.
07:05Because my idea of love is different now compared to before.
07:11At that time,
07:12at that point,
07:14it's not the love that you share with other people.
07:18For example, I love Joe.
07:19I love Vong.
07:21I have the same love for them.
07:24I love Ayon.
07:25But my love for her is not the same as my love for Vong and Joe.
07:29Do you have the same love for her?
07:33My love for her is not that deep.
07:38So, I can say,
07:39I love you.
07:40But,
07:41it's not 100 percent.
07:42There's no such thing as saying,
07:44I love you to her.
07:45I love you.
07:46But,
07:47you can also say,
07:48I love you to other people.
07:49It's like that.
07:50You loved her,
07:51but you were not in love with her.
07:53Yes.
07:55When you were together,
07:56did you feel that you were in love with her?
07:58It's like,
07:59I just believed her,
08:00but I didn't...
08:02I wanted to believe that she loved me.
08:04But,
08:05at the back of my mind,
08:07I was always thinking,
08:08that she was just fooling me.
08:09She was telling you otherwise.
08:10Yes.
08:11Did you feel that she was just fooling you?
08:12Yes.
08:13Because,
08:14that's how it is.
08:15It came from my feeling that it's not possible for us to be together.
08:19Then, we became together.
08:20So, I always thought that,
08:22anytime,
08:23this will disappear.
08:26It must have been sad.
08:27It's sad, right?
08:29Yes.
08:30It's like,
08:33I was living on the breadcrumbs
08:35that she was giving me.
08:37Breadcrumbs?
08:39Yes.
08:40Breadcrumbs.
08:41That's a lot of breadcrumbs.
08:42What kind of bread are you talking about?
08:46Breadcrumbs.
08:47What else?
08:49That's it.
08:50That's it.
08:51Yes.
08:52It's like,
08:53you're afraid of making mistakes.
08:55Right?
08:56Whatever you do,
08:57you're still thinking that she won't disappear.
09:00Because she really likes Guy.
09:01Yes.
09:02Then, she feels that he's not the one, right?
09:04Yes.
09:05She's trying to please him.
09:06She's doing everything she can to please Ivan.
09:09Then, when you broke up,
09:10that's it.
09:11You broke up forever.
09:12Yes.
09:13When we broke up,
09:14I didn't ask him back.
09:16Because,
09:17or I didn't beg him.
09:18Because,
09:19I was like,
09:21I was forced to do that.
09:23So, I just accepted it.
09:24So, it was really fast.
09:25Just one month.
09:26So,
09:27there's a second part.
09:28The relationship.
09:30Oh, you two got back together.
09:31We got back together after
09:34five months, I think.
09:35Who got back together?
09:38I asked him.
09:39We had an outing.
09:40Then,
09:41he was with me.
09:42Oh, you don't have anything to do in Ambagan?
09:47You don't have anything to share, right?
09:50Yes.
09:51It's a potluck.
09:52I have a 350 Pulsary.
09:53I have that in my school.
09:55I'll come back later
09:56because I don't have any content.
09:57Just kidding.
09:58So, we got back together.
09:59Then,
10:00our choir.
10:01And then,
10:03I saw him again.
10:06How I got to know him before.
10:09Because,
10:10in our first month,
10:11I think,
10:12he changed.
10:13Because,
10:15we had a lot of
10:17quarrels.
10:19Then,
10:20I think,
10:21slowly fading away,
10:22the
10:23first impression
10:24I had of him,
10:25the things I liked about him,
10:26slowly fading away.
10:27And then,
10:28when we got together again
10:29for that outing,
10:32I liked him again
10:33because I saw
10:34the very lively
10:35Novi again.
10:37And then,
10:38I got attracted to him again.
10:40You got attracted to him again.
10:41Yes.
10:42So,
10:43you brought him back
10:44because he looked happy again.
10:45I got attracted to him.
10:46And then,
10:47I sort of
10:48fixed
10:49my feelings
10:50for him.
10:51What about you?
10:52When he was
10:53courting you,
10:54what did you do?
10:55Why did you come back?
10:57He's fragile.
10:59He's still my crush,
11:01even after
11:02what he did to me.
11:04So,
11:05when he showed
11:06interest
11:08in our group chat,
11:10he said,
11:11thank you,
11:12I still love you.
11:14So,
11:15I came back
11:16because
11:17I still love him.
11:19So,
11:20I got attracted to him again.
11:21And then,
11:22it took a while
11:23for you to come back.
11:24That was
11:25our one-year
11:26and four-month
11:27relationship.
11:28Did you feel
11:29that he was in love with you?
11:30Did he fall in love with you
11:31at that time?
11:32Yes,
11:33I did.
11:34I felt it.
11:35Really?
11:36Did you really
11:37fall in love with him?
11:38Yes.
11:39Yes.
11:40I'm loyal to him.
11:44I'm trying my best
11:46to understand him.
11:47Because
11:48that was
11:49my idea
11:50of love
11:51before.
11:52What are
11:53the manifestations
11:54of love?
11:55Because
11:56he's loyal to people,
11:57but he doesn't
11:58love people.
11:59But because
12:00he's just
12:01objecting
12:02their conversation.
12:04He's just
12:05objecting.
12:06Right?
12:07It's like
12:09for example,
12:10you're getting married.
12:11I need him
12:12as my husband.
12:13Right?
12:14I'm not
12:15going to
12:16stop you.
12:17You're already
12:18objecting
12:19being his husband
12:20because you already
12:21accepted it.
12:22Right?
12:23And there's
12:24a reason
12:25why you did it.
12:26You objected it.
12:27But love,
12:28it's different.
12:29The manifestations
12:30of love,
12:31how do you
12:32say,
12:33I'm in love with him.
12:34You're always
12:35thinking about him.
12:36If you don't
12:37talk to him,
12:38he'll leave you.
12:41You want to
12:42see him right away.
12:43You want to
12:44kiss him.
12:45You're so looking
12:46forward to that
12:47one
12:48time
12:50that you'll
12:51kiss.
12:52Yes.
12:53You'll hug him.
12:54You'll go on a date.
12:56There's a rush
12:57in his presence.
12:58Did you feel
12:59Novi's kiss?
13:00Did you feel
13:01that way about him?
13:03No.
13:05Don't you feel
13:06the rush in Novi's
13:07presence?
13:08No, because
13:09that...
13:10You already
13:11kissed for a year.
13:13Four months.
13:14What did you feel?
13:15Was there a kiss?
13:16Was there love?
13:17Was it like magic?
13:18Or was there
13:19no difference
13:20in the rush?
13:23The kiss
13:24was just like
13:25holding hands.
13:26Like that?
13:27Yes.
13:28No, because
13:29holding hands
13:30already has that
13:31feeling.
13:32But your first
13:33kiss with him
13:34was different.
13:35You're in love.
13:36It's like
13:37you're dreaming.
13:38It's so soft.
13:41But when you
13:42kissed and
13:43held hands,
13:44it's okay.
13:46So,
13:47that's it.
13:48That's why
13:50while we were
13:51listening,
13:53I was questioning
13:55what I was asking.
13:57Is it true that
13:58he's in love?
13:59Why didn't
14:00the kiss come?
14:01Even if it was
14:02just a smack.
14:03Why did it take
14:04so long to answer?
14:05Even you,
14:06you were shocked.
14:07Why?
14:08Why did you react like that?
14:09Actually,
14:10that's why
14:11I invited him
14:12especially for you
14:13so that
14:14I can answer
14:15that question.
14:16If
14:17everything
14:18was just
14:19romanticized
14:20by my brain
14:21or if he really
14:22loved me.
14:24And
14:27now,
14:28the romantic
14:29moments
14:30in my brain
14:33at that time
14:34were just
14:35normal to him.
14:36So,
14:37it hurts a little
14:39but
14:40I can do it.
14:42Because you also mentioned
14:43earlier
14:46that you chose
14:47to believe.
14:48Right?
14:49The one
14:50I wanted to believe
14:52was that.
14:53I wanted to believe
14:54that it's true.
14:55I wanted to believe
14:56that it's true.
14:57But
14:58now,
14:59you reached a point
15:00where you're thinking
15:01did I believe
15:02myself
15:03or did it really happen?
15:04Yes.
15:05But,
15:06I don't want to
15:07villainize him.
15:08I don't want to
15:09villainize.
15:11I'm always a villain.
15:12No, we will not
15:13villainize him.
15:14We will try to understand.
15:15Yes, because
15:16it's not his fault
15:17if he doesn't love me.
15:18But,
15:19that's it.
15:21At least,
15:22now, he answered
15:23to me
15:24that
15:25okay.
15:26It's not his fault
15:27that he doesn't love you
15:28because love
15:29doesn't force you.
15:30But,
15:31it's your fault
15:32to believe
15:33the person
15:34you love
15:35even if
15:36it's not true.
15:37But,
15:38the whole truth
15:39or
15:40did he tell you
15:41if
15:42he really
15:43loved you back then?
15:44Did he really
15:45want to kiss you back then?
15:47Did he really
15:49love me
15:50when you took me?
15:51What's the real reason?
15:52Did he tell you that?
15:54Even if we're friends,
15:55I don't think
15:56I have the courage
15:57to ask him
15:59because
16:00I'm afraid
16:01to answer.
16:02So,
16:03What's the real score?
16:06Honestly,
16:07right now,
16:08I can only
16:09understand
16:10what happened
16:11before
16:12because
16:17of course,
16:18I was the one
16:19who broke up.
16:20I wanted to be
16:21the good guy.
16:22I'm still the good guy.
16:23I'm not bad.
16:24Now,
16:25I realized
16:26that
16:27I took a lot
16:28from him
16:30hoping
16:31that he would
16:32take something
16:33more authentic
16:34from others.
16:35Or,
16:36he gave
16:37something
16:38to you.
16:39What do you mean
16:40by authentic?
16:41Because,
16:42now,
16:43I realized
16:44that
16:45I'm doing everything
16:46because
16:47I need to look
16:48like a man.
16:50Why do you keep
16:51on saying that?
16:52You need to look
16:53like a man.
16:54What is your
16:55gender identity?
16:59Because
17:02I'm gay.
17:03I'm gay.
17:06And then,
17:07I said that
17:08to him.
17:10I know.
17:11He told me
17:12that in our
17:13second part
17:14of our relationship,
17:15the three-fourths
17:16of it,
17:17after the
17:18three-fourths,
17:21there was
17:22one time
17:23when we were
17:24going home
17:25and I was
17:26staring at him.
17:28Then,
17:29I asked him
17:30if he
17:31wanted to
17:32confess to me.
17:33But,
17:34at that time,
17:35my intention
17:36was to hear
17:37sweet words
17:38because
17:39I'm words
17:40of affirmation
17:41girly.
17:42But,
17:43that's when
17:44he suddenly
17:45confessed
17:46that at
17:47that moment,
17:48he had
17:49internal
17:50struggles
17:51with his
17:52sexuality.
17:53At that time,
17:54I didn't
17:55know
17:56how to
17:57handle
17:58that
17:59big
18:00problem
18:01of
18:02sexual
18:03oppression.
18:04So,
18:05what I did
18:06at that time,
18:07since I'm a
18:08psych major,
18:09I...
18:10You saw
18:11signs that
18:12you understand.
18:13Yes,
18:14and at the
18:15same time,
18:16I prioritized
18:17his welfare
18:18because
18:19he told me
18:20at that time
18:21that I shouldn't
18:22leave him
18:23because
18:24he has
18:25a dark
18:26base.
18:27What does
18:28that mean?
18:29What is
18:30that?
18:31It means
18:32that
18:33I should
18:34leave him
18:35because
18:36he has
18:37a dark
18:38base.
18:39I
18:40should
18:41leave him
18:42because
18:43he has
18:44a dark
18:45base.
18:46I
18:47should
18:48leave him
18:49because
18:50he has
18:51a dark
18:52base.
18:53I
18:54should
18:55leave him
18:56because
18:57he has
18:58a dark
18:59base.
19:00I
19:01should
19:02leave him
19:03because
19:04he has
19:05a dark
19:06base.
19:07I
19:08should
19:09leave him
19:10because
19:11he has
19:12a dark
19:13base.
19:14I
19:15should
19:16leave him
19:17because
19:18he has
19:19a dark
19:20base.
19:21I
19:22should
19:23leave him
19:24because
19:25he has
19:26a dark
19:27base.
19:28I
19:29should
19:30leave him
19:31because
19:32he has
19:33a dark
19:34base.
19:35I
19:36should
19:37leave him
19:38because
19:39he has
19:40a dark
19:41base.
19:42I
19:43should
19:44leave him
19:45because
19:46he has
19:47a dark
19:48base.
19:49I
19:50should
19:51leave him
19:52because
19:53he has
19:54a dark
19:55base.
19:56I
19:57should
19:58leave him
19:59because
20:00he has
20:01a dark
20:02base.
20:03I
20:04should
20:05leave him
20:06because
20:07he has
20:08a dark
20:09base.
20:10I
20:11should
20:12leave him
20:13because
20:14he has
20:15a dark
20:16base.
20:17I
20:18should
20:19leave him
20:20because
20:21he has
20:22a dark
20:23base.
20:24I
20:25should
20:26leave him
20:27because
20:28he has
20:29a dark
20:30base.
20:31I
20:32should
20:33leave him
20:34because
20:35he has
20:36a dark
20:37base.
20:38I
20:39should
20:40leave him
20:41because
20:42he has
20:43a dark
20:44base.
20:45I
20:46should
20:47leave him
20:48because
20:49he has
20:50a dark
20:51base.
20:52I
20:53should
20:54leave him
20:55because
20:56he has
20:57a dark
20:58base.
20:59I
21:00should
21:01leave him
21:02because
21:03he has
21:04a dark
21:05base.
21:06I
21:07should
21:08leave him
21:09because
21:10he has
21:11a dark
21:12base.
21:13I
21:14should
21:15leave him
21:16because
21:17he has
21:18a dark
21:19base.
21:20I
21:21should
21:22leave him
21:23because
21:24he has
21:25a dark
21:26base.
21:27I
21:28should
21:29leave him
21:30because
21:31he has
21:32a dark
21:33base.
21:34I
21:35should
21:36leave him
21:37because
21:38he has
21:39a dark
21:40base.
21:41I
21:42should
21:43leave him
21:44because
21:45he has
21:46a dark
21:47base.
21:48I
21:49should
21:50leave him
21:51because
21:52he has
21:53a dark
21:54base.
21:55I
21:56should
21:57leave him
21:58because
21:59he has
22:00a dark
22:01base.
22:02I
22:03should
22:04leave him
22:05because
22:06he has
22:07a dark
22:08base.
22:09I
22:10should
22:11leave him
22:12because
22:13he has
22:14a dark
22:15base.
22:16I
22:17should
22:18leave him
22:19because
22:20he has
22:21a dark
22:22base.
22:23I
22:24should
22:25leave him
22:26because
22:27he has
22:28a dark
22:29base.
22:30I
22:31should
22:32leave him
22:33because
22:34he has
22:35a dark
22:36base.
22:37I
22:38should
22:39leave him
22:40because
22:41he has
22:42a dark
22:43base.
22:44I
22:45should
22:46leave him
22:47because
22:48he has
22:49a dark
22:50base.
22:51I
22:52should
22:53leave him
22:54because
22:55he has
22:56a dark
22:57base.
22:58I
22:59should
23:00leave him
23:01because
23:02he has
23:03a dark
23:04base.
23:05I
23:06should
23:07leave him
23:08because
23:09he has
23:10a dark
23:11base.
23:12I
23:13should
23:14leave him
23:15because
23:16he has
23:17a dark
23:18base.
23:19I