On this week’s episode of RealTrending, Tracey chats with Chris Trapani and Ryan Iwanaga, lifelong friends, co-founders, and partners of Christie’s International Real Estate Sereno.
While working with your best friend might be a recipe for disaster for some, Chris and Ryan have used their relationship and leadership to grow Sereno into the largest, locally-owned and operated independent brokerage in Northern California. The three of them talk about the power of relationships, evolving market challenges, and where AI is headed in real estate.
Here’s what you’ll learn:
Their childhood friendship has been the foundation for their business partnership.
Local decision-making is crucial in the dynamic real estate market.
Technology, especially AI, is rapidly evolving and needs to be embraced.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness.
Self-awareness is key in managing professional relationships.
Focusing on solutions rather than problems leads to better outcomes.
The journey of independence is both a personal and professional evolution.
While working with your best friend might be a recipe for disaster for some, Chris and Ryan have used their relationship and leadership to grow Sereno into the largest, locally-owned and operated independent brokerage in Northern California. The three of them talk about the power of relationships, evolving market challenges, and where AI is headed in real estate.
Here’s what you’ll learn:
Their childhood friendship has been the foundation for their business partnership.
Local decision-making is crucial in the dynamic real estate market.
Technology, especially AI, is rapidly evolving and needs to be embraced.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness.
Self-awareness is key in managing professional relationships.
Focusing on solutions rather than problems leads to better outcomes.
The journey of independence is both a personal and professional evolution.
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NewsTranscript
00:00Chris Trapani and Ryan Iwanaga have been partners in Christie's International Real Estate Sereno
00:08for almost all of their lives.
00:11They grew up together on the same street.
00:14They went to high school and college together, and now they are business partners.
00:19And that could sometimes be a recipe for disaster, but not with the two of them.
00:24And they talk about how they make their leadership team work and have some great suggestions
00:29on handling friction in your leadership team or your team in general.
00:35So enjoy the podcast.
00:38Chris and Ryan, welcome to The Real Trending Podcast.
00:41Thanks for being here.
00:42Thanks so much, Tracy.
00:43Thanks, Tracy.
00:44Thanks for having us.
00:45Yeah, thank you.
00:46Yeah.
00:47So you guys have been in the news lately, at least real estate news.
00:52Christie's International Real Estate was obviously acquired by Compass, yet your firm, the Sereno
00:57firm, wanted to stay independent.
01:00So tell me a little bit about, kind of walk me through your decision and what that entailed
01:06and where you are now.
01:08Yeah.
01:09So thanks again for having us.
01:11This is awesome to be here.
01:13So I think that answer to that question goes back to 1976 when Ryan and I were 10.
01:21And we were just young kids living on Sobey Road in Saratoga, which at the time is before
01:27Silicon Valley was what it is.
01:29It was a kind of a farming community.
01:33And we kind of met along the driveway and sparked a friendship from back then.
01:39But I think, you know, we didn't always follow the straight path growing up.
01:44We were fairly rebellious.
01:46Ryan was a skateboarder, built a half pipe in his driveway his dad didn't like very much.
01:52And I was a surfer growing up.
01:54So I think, you know, part of what drew us to those sports was sort of that individuality,
01:59a way to express yourself kind of creatively, kind of counter to maybe, you know, whatever
02:06else was going on.
02:07So I think we always had that rebel soul.
02:11Our dads wondered if we were ever going to be able to point that in a constructive direction.
02:17But somehow, kind of through the developments that we'll probably talk about here on the
02:22show, we were able to channel that in as agents, you know, as managers and in a other
02:30company that years before had acquired our original company through some executive roles
02:36and kind of the spirit of what launched Serena was the very same spirit that Ryan and I sensed
02:43back in 1976.
02:44You know, we were kids.
02:46And so the draw to that has been very powerful and organic and natural for us, you know,
02:53all the way through.
02:55Even though we had a wonderful partnership with App Properties and, you know, we cannot
03:00thank Thad Wong and Mike Golden enough.
03:03They're phenomenal leaders.
03:04They run an incredible operation.
03:06We learned a lot from them.
03:08But when this opportunity popped up, I mean, you know, there's like the kind of emotions
03:13of like, oh, my gosh, you know, like I didn't really ponder that potential.
03:18You know, there's kind of the the the mental part of wrapping your mind around it.
03:22But I think at the heart level, like the second that opportunity appeared, I think Ryan and
03:27I both knew that this is the direction that we needed to go.
03:30Yeah.
03:31And, you know, there's so many layers to the decision and to the experience that we've
03:35had at Serena Group, you know, since 2006 when we founded it, even before then.
03:42And it really is kind of this lifelong personal journey somehow, just as fate would have it.
03:48We've always ended up either, you know, roommates in college or I mean, we we were actually
03:54next to our neighbors growing up and shared driveways.
03:58Chris lived on a flag lot and and our driveway split down the road.
04:03And you know, I had we had I had three sisters.
04:07It was me and three sisters and and there were four boys over at the Trapneys house.
04:11So I gravitated to being over there oftentimes, you know, every day.
04:16And that kind of sprouted the kind of lifelong story that we've been telling.
04:21And so and I think also it's important to say that both of our fathers were very entrepreneurial
04:26and independent.
04:27You know, they worked for themselves and were able to create success and, you know, excel
04:35in the business world just on their own individual kind of spirit.
04:39And I think that was tremendously influential to both Chris and I.
04:43And so I think, you know, when we started Sereno Group, it was us against the world
04:50type of mentality.
04:51And we had some ideas about what we wanted to create and, you know, kind of presented
04:57with the opportunity to kind of go back to that independent spirit.
05:02I think initially we were like, oh, what does that mean?
05:04But we quickly became, you know, we realized, I think, individually and collectively that
05:09it was it was the right thing to do is the most natural and authentic.
05:14And as Chris said, I mean, our partnership with that and Mike and the rest of the leadership
05:18team at that was tremendous.
05:22They built an incredible brokerage, very smart business people, but also live from the heart
05:31and have a wonderful spirit.
05:32And so we just really learned from them.
05:36And it was exciting to think that we could now kind of apply, you know, the education
05:41and the learning that we've had over the last couple of years to try to rescale Sereno,
05:46Christie Sereno, and just see what we can come up with as independents again.
05:52So it made it was a very easy decision.
05:57And we kind of jumped at that opportunity.
06:00So I want to go back to the fact that you grew up together.
06:03You're kind of like the U2 of real estate instead of like the Black Crows, right?
06:09Yeah.
06:10Yeah, that's right.
06:11Yeah.
06:12Yeah.
06:13That's a great story.
06:14Yeah.
06:15They were all childhood friends.
06:16Yeah.
06:17Of course.
06:18Great story.
06:19Yeah.
06:20Yeah.
06:21So and that's interesting.
06:22You know, tell me about that relationship.
06:23I mean, because not a lot of people who were friends growing up can go into business together
06:28and for this long, and really not just hate each other by the end of it.
06:36So that's a great question.
06:38Yeah.
06:39So, Ryan, I want to start with you, and then we'll go to Chris.
06:42Okay.
06:43So, you know, it's funny, because it just sort of it just sort of naturally happened
06:47that way.
06:48You know, and I do think a lot has to do with family influence and in sort of, you know,
06:56we always bring up the fact that we're fourth generation Santa Clara County people, right?
07:02You know, community and the cultural community was very important to each of our families.
07:09We had strong mothers and very strong fathers.
07:14And so there was a lot of similarities, right?
07:16Chris had grown up in San Jose and then moved into Saratoga.
07:19I had grown up in San Jose and Campbell and kind of moved into Saratoga and we sort of
07:23found ourselves out in the country.
07:25That's when Soapy Road was country.
07:28And so just by virtue of kind of being out there and being next door neighbors, we gravitated
07:33to each other.
07:35I think when people ask me, like, how has it been able to last as long?
07:41I think, you know, the family influence like I talked about, I think ultimately we both
07:47want the same thing.
07:50Sometimes where people are very, the first thing they realize is that we're definitely
07:56different personalities, right?
07:57Where the yin and yang, where Chris is very, you know, he's introverted, but he's extroverted
08:04and very social.
08:06I'm kind of a social introvert where I love people, but I also kind of like behind the
08:12scenes a little bit more.
08:14And so the energy balances out.
08:17I can tell you that it's probably taken a lot of patience and forgiveness and there
08:20have been times when, you know, things aren't working, but I think after a lifelong relationship
08:27and sort of being best friends for so long, ultimately that's kind of what always prevails.
08:33And you know, I think the business is never that important to where it jeopardizes the
08:39relationship, right?
08:41And I think that's where that value system comes along.
08:46And, you know, I personally, I can tell you that one of the biggest breaks that I ever
08:50had was, you know, I was, Chris got into real estate right away and he was able to really
08:55work hard and build a successful real estate career.
08:58I kind of did graduate school.
09:01I walked this completely different path.
09:03And then I realized that I just wanted to start working.
09:07And you know, I think just by nature, real estate can be very competitive.
09:12And I remember calling Chris, I was a doctorate student at, I was working on my PhD many lives
09:20ago, but I called him and I said, I'm thinking about getting into residential real estate.
09:24And he could have very easily just said, okay, well, good luck.
09:28But what he said was come back home, get your license and work under me and I'll teach you
09:31the business.
09:32And then you can go out on your own when you're ready.
09:34And you know, that made, that was a huge difference.
09:39Like that made all the difference in my life and my family.
09:42And it's impacted me and it was a good lesson for me to learn coming in about kind of the
09:48generosity and the opportunity that I can create if I ever got to a certain position.
09:54And so that influence, you know, it's, it works that way where you kind of just recognize,
10:01you know, the journey is kind of we've done together and we've both contributed to our
10:07lives in a positive way.
10:08So that always kind of prevails.
10:10Yeah.
10:12What about, what about you?
10:13What's your take on that?
10:14That's awesome.
10:15No, he said, Ryan shared some great stuff.
10:16I was just sitting here thinking, you know, next July, ironically, is Serino's 20th anniversary,
10:24but it's also the 50th anniversary of the summer that I met Ryan.
10:28That's true.
10:29I hadn't actually thought about that.
10:31It's really interesting.
10:32And so as Ryan's speaking, I get a little chills now thinking about it.
10:36I mean, I, you know, I, if I really take a step back, I have to believe there's some,
10:41you call it providence or, you know, divine intervention or whatever it might be.
10:45There definitely is kind of, in my mind, kind of, if I really think about it, there's got
10:50to be some higher power that kind of gravitated us together on that, that little country road.
10:56And that somehow, even though we've kind of done different things along the way, high
11:00school together, Cal Poly, Ryan went off to grad school and all that, really, it keeps
11:04bringing us back together again, right.
11:07You know, over that time.
11:11And yeah, I mean, as Ryan said, you know, we figured out Ryan's process oriented and
11:16I'm results oriented, right.
11:18And so, you know, when you're kind of, it's almost like a marriage, you know, you get
11:22married, you don't know all these things about the other person.
11:25And a lot of times we're not ever really able to unpack what's actually causing the tension,
11:31you know, like it's hard to, unless you really do the work, you don't really know, you know,
11:36what those drivers are.
11:37So to be super transparent here for the listeners, you know, we kind of figured that boy, after
11:43all those years, there was a point where we had a ton of tension, you know, we were always
11:47able to kind of manage through it, but we cared enough about the relationship.
11:52Because truthfully, Ryan's my brother.
11:54I mean, I have three brothers, but Ryan is my fourth brother.
11:57And so we actually hired a professional and we literally hired this incredible therapist
12:03that we had like sessions.
12:05We had like enough sessions, just, we unpacked stuff and we just said what we needed to say.
12:10And, you know, I remember kind of like at the end of the sixth session, it was like,
12:15okay, well, Ryan, do you have anything else?
12:17No.
12:18Chris, do you have anything else?
12:20No.
12:21It was kind of like, okay.
12:23And then we kind of just, you know, like went back to work.
12:25I will say, I think that was incredibly healthy and helpful because since that time, I think
12:32for me personally, I gained an understanding of kind of how Ryan's feelings and the way
12:36he thinks and kind of what matters to him.
12:38And so, you know, even though I can't really change myself, I can actually be aware of
12:44my actions and what I'm doing or how I'm communicating and how that might have an impact on him.
12:51Right.
12:52And so if that's kind of built into that, I think it's given us more momentum as a result
12:57of that.
12:58Yeah.
12:59I love that.
13:00I love that because it's about self-awareness and also, you know, getting help when you
13:04felt like you needed help.
13:06And I love the relationship.
13:09That's wonderful.
13:10You know, the driver to go see the therapist, it was more about the personal relationship
13:16than the business.
13:17Right.
13:18And the business was so mixed in with the personal.
13:21But really, I think both of us just wanted to get through it.
13:24So it was really important.
13:26That's great.
13:27Yeah.
13:28I mean, we were in a marriage where the people showed up after 45 years said, hey, we actually
13:31do still want to be together.
13:33You know, we just want to figure out how to manage that togetherness.
13:37Right.
13:38Yeah.
13:39Yeah.
13:40Oh, my gosh.
13:41So, Chris, tell me, I want to kind of get back to the business a little bit and find
13:45out, like, dig a little deeper.
13:47What advantages do you really see staying locally owned rather than being part of a
13:52larger corporate structure?
13:54Yeah, I know.
13:55It's a great question.
13:56And so probably a lot of us are listeners have been, you know, banked at a community
14:02bank.
14:03Right.
14:04Where people know your name and you walk in and there's a relationship there.
14:07Right.
14:08And that, I think, does still matter to people as much as technologies come and all the things
14:13that have changed there.
14:14I think at the end of the day, that that is still a draw.
14:18And so when you get into residential real estate, I mean, this is a this is a when I
14:23say uniquely personalized relational business, that probably doesn't really do it justice.
14:28Right.
14:29I mean, the way that that real estate agents interact with clients is at the most personal
14:34level going through the most, you know, you know, transformative life changes and decisions
14:40and things.
14:41And so kind of the nature of that relationship, I think, is synonymous with the relationship
14:47agents have with their brokerage and the owners and the leaders.
14:50Right.
14:52That was our experience as agents in the first company we were with in the early 90s.
14:56And, you know, look, we knew we knew we were in it with the owners.
15:00You know, they were all in.
15:01They were local people.
15:02They had sold real estate in the Bay Area, you know, and so there was just a sense of
15:06community pride and really feeling like you had a voice in that mix.
15:11Right.
15:12And then we there was some big acquisitions and we kind of experienced a different environment
15:16where it was definitely more of a business minded culture.
15:19And that's fine.
15:20You know, we learned a lot from that and you can definitely achieve results.
15:24And there's a lot of great companies that I think have tend to have more of those type
15:28of cultures.
15:29But yet, you know, there are some limitations back to, again, where local decision making.
15:36OK, all these markets are very different.
15:39And we learned that in a prior company a few a few iterations ago.
15:44And so having really the hyper local knowledge, the local decision making to be able to make
15:51those decisions on the fly.
15:52I mean, those kind of things really matter to real estate agents.
15:56Right.
15:57The business is very dynamic.
15:58And so, you know, things are moving very quickly.
16:00And so all I could say is as a having been an agent manager owner, been in a bigger big
16:07merger and then back out again, as I know for me, my level of engagement was almost
16:12like the moment that we knew we were doing this, like all of a sudden it just activated.
16:17It was like not that I wasn't into what we were doing, but I was managing a lot of other
16:21dynamics that I think some that were at the detriment of kind of some of the benefits
16:26I'm talking about.
16:27So that activation of all of a sudden being like, wow, this is ours again.
16:32And we're going to put all of our heart and focus on that.
16:36So Ryan, let's talk about priorities.
16:38Obviously, brokerages, you know, brokerage growth is difficult right now.
16:42The market's low, you know, there's a commission compression, you know, compression on gross
16:49margins.
16:50It's just been a difficult market overall, especially with the settlements and the uncertainty
16:57of all of that.
16:58So what are some of your priorities and what how are you getting creative to grow moving
17:04forward?
17:06Well, you know, we've always been a culturally centered organization.
17:10Right. And and I think, first of all, what what we our approach is, is that obviously we're
17:17paying attention to expenses.
17:19Right. I think what we've learned from our experience with with that properties is that they
17:24were very, very skilled in creating systems, infrastructure and really kind of
17:31understanding where all the, you know, the company dollar went and what it was for and
17:38where it was supporting the company.
17:40And we've always been aware of that.
17:42But, you know, we were really focused on culture at first and we always have been.
17:48And so really moving forward, I think our strategy is to really kind of some of the things
17:54that Chris said about having agents more engaged with the idea of being an independent
17:58broker. I think what we're what we're doing now is we're focused on balancing the two,
18:06that we can have a culturally rich environment, but also be very mindful of the back end
18:11infrastructure in our systems that we we put in place to manage the company with a little
18:16bit more, I think, pragmatism.
18:20Right. And an understanding kind of where the levers are that we need to execute on and
18:26maximize and how that impacts culture and how we can use that as a tool to enhance
18:32culture. You know, it's having a culturally rich environment.
18:37It's a it's a little bit kind of it's a nebulous thing that there's not a definition.
18:41It's just a feeling that people have when they come into the organization.
18:46And I think that that's still attractive to agents.
18:48And so our hope is, is that our move to independence kind of gives agents a choice.
18:55That I think if you have if it's very homogenous and it's all corporatized and there's, you
19:01know, these these nationally kind of national brokerages, I think agents always want a
19:09choice. And it's OK if they could choose to be at what we have.
19:13I have best friends that are at other brokerages and whatever works for them is great.
19:17That's the beauty of the business.
19:18But we've always seen ourselves as as kind of the opportunity or the or the alternative
19:24to that. And, you know, I think kind of going back to Chris's question, I think the
19:30local the localness of the brokerage matters.
19:33I think one of the founding premises that we had as a brokerage is that really
19:37residential real estate is I think just by the way that business is done, it's really
19:43meant to be a mom and pop business.
19:45Right. Where you have people from the community who sell in the community, live in the
19:49community where an arm's length distance away from decisions and the client and the
19:55agent. And I think those things matter to agents.
19:57And I think they'll continue to matter, even though there's all of these kind of changes
20:01and restrictions and it's getting more challenging to run a run a brokerage.
20:07But at the same time, I think if we focus on, you know, building culture through smart
20:12business, that it will be attractive to agents and will continue to attract good talent and
20:18good people. So, yeah.
20:20And I want to talk to Chris about attracting talent, because it sounds like that's what
20:26you're really focused on based on your culture rather than recruiting, per se, finding
20:32the people who fit the best with what you're trying to do.
20:36So, Chris, tell me a little bit about your recruiting strategy.
20:39And, you know, do you do you recruit to like a boutique brand?
20:45Is that you tell me a little bit more about what you're doing?
20:48No, that's great. It's awesome.
20:51And so I think really what we have here is we've got really the best of both.
20:57And so, you know, Serino, like a lot of real estate brokerages, that's a made up name.
21:01Right. Ryan and I made, you know, along with a group of agents.
21:05And so but Serino is kind of the heart and soul of the company.
21:10It's the DNA. It's the thing that retains agents.
21:13It's the thing that draws agents in.
21:15Right. Christie's is this tier one global luxury brand that you could transport into
21:19basically any market and people know what it is.
21:22And so that's kind of the opportunity we think that we bring is we have this, hey, you
21:28can get this really personalized brokerage, highly dynamic, hyperlocal leadership, you
21:34know, in focus decision making.
21:37And you also have this luxury brand that spans the globe.
21:40Right. And so it's been really awesome to see a couple of things.
21:45One, a number of our agents before we took the company back have really leveraged the
21:49Christie's brand. I mean, one of our agents in Incline Village, Christine Perry, you
21:55know, has gone up there and really, really, literally made a splash in the market, sold
21:59the highest property ever, highest sale price on the lake.
22:04And Incline last year is very highly publicized for sixty two million dollars, went and
22:09sold another one on the buy side.
22:11It was listed at forty four million.
22:12So here's someone that was an original founder of the company out of the original twenty
22:17seven, you know, that's been with us the entire time that now also took that brand and
22:23leveraged it out there. So that's the draw we think really that we have.
22:26And it's been very interesting internally.
22:30You know, we started the company and we were signing these personal guarantees on these
22:34leases. Of course, on the most fearful day, I wondered how are we going to ever fill
22:39these buildings with good people?
22:40Right. Well, it turns out twenty seven people grew to six hundred and fifty people.
22:45And so, you know, fast forward to, you know, we had to make this decision to take back
22:50the company very quickly.
22:51We couldn't go talk to six hundred people and take a poll.
22:55We couldn't do that. But the moment the news came out that, hey, this big transaction is
23:00happening, we're not part of that.
23:02And by the way, we're taking the company back.
23:04People went nuts.
23:07They were so happy.
23:08I mean, we were overwhelmed and humbled.
23:10And just it was so affirming that not only our people, but we're getting message.
23:15I got calls from broker owners that used to own their companies and people that are
23:19leading major companies around the country just like, wow, that's amazing.
23:23It's incredible. So that's kind of that momentum now that we're building on.
23:27And that's drawing in some agents, of course, some that we've already recruited in in the
23:31first couple of weeks that are being, you know, hitting the news wires now as well.
23:35So, again, it's just kind of like building upon that what I just talked about and gaining
23:40that momentum back again.
23:41We're off to a really good start.
23:43Yeah, I would assume that uncertainty that comes with an acquisition became certainty
23:49once you you kind of put your plan out there for your agents.
23:53And, you know, I could imagine they would be happy just because of the idea of just
24:00not knowing what's next with a with a acquisition.
24:03So well, they have direct to us now again, now they can, you know, not that they didn't,
24:07but now they're like, oh, we get these guys again.
24:09We can, you know. Yeah.
24:11So it's pretty awesome.
24:14So I want to shift to technology.
24:16Obviously, more and more brokerages are adopting AI and it's really reshaping the
24:24industry. So from a brokerage perspective, what key innovations do you feel like
24:31brokerages need to be looking at or adopting?
24:35And are you actively looking at some of those efficiencies in the back office or
24:41marketing wise?
24:43Yeah, so I think, yes, we are looking at them.
24:48The whole world seems, you know, especially being here in Silicon Valley, the whole
24:52world seems to be about AI.
24:55Most people think they know what AI is about and kind of where the future is going.
24:59But no one really knows.
25:01And I think the one thing that we've learned, especially, you know, having the tech
25:05center of the world be in our backyard, is that whatever you think is relevant today is
25:11not going to be relevant tomorrow.
25:13And I think in particular with AI, you know, there's this evolution that is happening
25:22probably faster than people could actually kind of understand.
25:27You know, it seems to be in the news cycle locally here almost every day.
25:32And so we are looking at that, you know, I'm a little bit more it's so early on with
25:38AI that I'm interested and I've done some personal research.
25:42I've been talking with different AI companies just on a personal level just to try to
25:47educate myself and kind of look at the future.
25:51And there's a lot of really interesting, exciting stuff that's going on.
25:55There's contract AI, there's legal AI, there's all these sorts of things that can be
26:00applied to real estate practice.
26:03I do think that where the technology will have the most impact is, you know, I always
26:09talk about when I got into the business in 97, you know, the flyers, I would take my
26:14photos, I would take my own photos, I would take it to one hour development and then I'd
26:19get a glue stick and I'd glue it onto the flyer that I made.
26:22And there wasn't any printers.
26:24It was all just sort of, you know, DIY.
26:27And, you know, there was no Internet, I didn't have a cell phone, nothing like that.
26:31And now, you know, I think when I broke it down, you know, just in the very minimum,
26:38there's anywhere from 30 to 40 steps.
26:42When you take a listing to getting it to market, it grows more complex on the daily.
26:50And I think agents tend to do it themselves.
26:53Right. Every good agent that I know has really wants to be in control of every step.
26:59And that's what makes them good.
27:01And I think what AI can do in our business is somehow alleviate some of those box
27:07checking tasks.
27:09Right. And sort of streamline it.
27:13I have yet to see anything that does that right now.
27:16I know that there's a lot of talk of CRM stuff and, you know, contact management and
27:21how to how to market to people.
27:23And but everything sort of seems a little bit early and I'm kind of excited to see
27:31where it goes. But there isn't a company that I know of right now in the real estate
27:35space that is actually doing that yet.
27:38I anticipate that's where it's going to be.
27:41And I remember when personal agent websites were first coming out, like everybody
27:47claimed that their website was the next best thing.
27:50And then six months later, it was outdated.
27:52Right. And people had spent a lot of money investing in their websites and so on and so
27:58forth. And then they just continually evolved.
28:00And so I just think that right now it's important to educate and understand what I can
28:06do and then see where it goes.
28:09And we're continually looking at that as a company.
28:12And just out of personal curiosity, I'm trying to stay on top of it as well.
28:16Yeah, absolutely.
28:18So I want to since you have been leaders for for a long time, Chris, tell me, what is the
28:25biggest like leadership lesson that you've learned over your years in business?
28:31I'm sure there are a lot.
28:32Boy, you know what? Yeah, those lessons have come the hard way.
28:35I wish they were easy, but I'm glad you asked that question.
28:40I've so a couple top of mind, I would say is being respected is more important than being
28:47liked. And that's that's kind of a tough one, you know, because real estate people were in
28:52the business of being liked, you know, as agents, we want people to like us, we want
28:57people to do business with us and all those kind of things.
28:59And oftentimes it's hard to tell people the tough news.
29:03So that that was a hard lesson for me to learn.
29:07I'm still learning it and I'm trying to practice that in my communications with people.
29:12It's helped to kind of create some mental boundaries around situations.
29:17Right. I used to instantly kind of throw myself emotionally into the middle of whatever, you
29:22know, the current trauma of the hour is.
29:25And that's not a sustainable way to go.
29:28So that's probably, you know, one of the top ones.
29:34Also, the other, I would say, is asking for help is not a sign of weakness.
29:40And that's a tough one, too, you know, I mean, a lot of us are brought up to think you got to
29:44be tough. You need to do things on your own.
29:47If you say you need help, it's, you know, it's it's so that's a trap as well.
29:55And I've had to kind of learn that, you know, if there's something that I need help with, I
29:59need to ask people for help.
30:00And that does a lot of things.
30:01Right. That kind of, you know, takes that burden off of me.
30:05It actually engages other people and builds trust with the people you're working with.
30:09And it gives them an opportunity to actually grow and excel, you know, in the ways where
30:14their talents are. Right.
30:15Because otherwise, you know, you can run all around and try to take care of everything and
30:19you're going to get some results.
30:20But eventually you're going to crash and burn.
30:23And so that's not a good way to go.
30:26Yeah. And Ryan, in business, you know, entrepreneurs have a lot of aha moments.
30:33What was your greatest aha moment and what came of it or what was developed because of
30:38it? Gosh, you know, there's been so many.
30:42I think the aha moment for me was.
30:47I think the importance of being humble, right, and self-reflective and self-aware.
30:52Right. I think when I first became a manager and a leader, I thought that I had to make
30:57these bold decisions and it was black and white.
31:00And I was very sort of, you know, I was I was just super, super like thinking that I
31:08needed to carry the weight of every decision and sort of gave myself all this
31:14responsibility. And really what I've learned over time is I think leadership is about
31:19understanding and empathy and and ultimately, like Chris says, you know, making
31:25decisions that are based in doing the right thing and and not worrying about whether
31:31someone's going to like you or not.
31:33Right. Because ultimately, I think.
31:37You know, I'm serving the people that I lead, right, and it's not the other way around,
31:43and I think that that's an important thing where I've as opposed to reacting and I've
31:49always been a very reactionary as a kid, I was always very reactionary.
31:54But as opposed to doing that, then just to be with whatever's going on, getting and
32:00gaining perspective and self-awareness and then trying to make the best decision moving
32:04forward. And I think whenever I do that, it's always served me better.
32:10Right. The end result is is more collaborative and and I think relationship building, as
32:17Chris said. And, you know, I think the people that you're with are the most important
32:23thing about leadership and you always have to keep that at the center.
32:27Yeah, I as a people pleaser myself, I definitely have struggled with the, you know, the
32:34respect over people liking you.
32:36And it's taken me years to to really kind of hone that and and not be concerned about
32:42whether someone likes me or not, and instead be concerned about whether they respect me.
32:47So I can I can definitely see that one, I think, is one of those that you work on for a
32:52lifetime. Right.
32:54Definitely. Yeah.
32:57So my last question, and this is for for both of you, I'm going to start with Chris, but if
33:02you could give one piece of advice to brokerage owners who might be struggling with a
33:07relationship they're having with a leadership team member other than going to therapy, what
33:15what advice do you have for kind of helping them work through that relationship or that idea
33:23of friction?
33:25Boy, that's a really interesting question.
33:27I mean, I think using some of the some of the, you know, some of the lessons that I just
33:33mentioned in trying to apply those right.
33:35And, you know, what that does following those lessons does help to kind of, you know, less
33:43emotionally get your mind around the situation.
33:46Right. Like, I just I cannot emphasize for so many years how I really attach like my
33:51personal and emotional well-being on like outcomes.
33:55I was so attached to every little outcome that literally it can make you sick.
34:01And so I think, again, the first thing is creating that boundary and, you know, carving
34:07some emotional detachment to the outcome.
34:09Like, what's the worst thing that's going to happen here?
34:12Right. I used to catastrophize.
34:13I still can. I can do it with the best of them.
34:16But to try to avoid going down that path of, you know, well, if I do this and then this
34:21happens and this happens, then the whole world, all of a sudden the whole thing's blown up.
34:25Right. I used to do that.
34:27And so now I have to say, OK, based on the situation, here's the reality of the situation.
34:33Here's what I believe in my healthy space of the lessons I just shared on what needs to
34:40happen. And I need to be OK with the outcome of that situation.
34:45I can't be so beholden to whatever happens with the outcome that I actually can't make a
34:51clear decision and lead.
34:52Again, that's tough because everything's not always black and white.
34:56But fortunately, if you've had enough experiences that you can draw from and say, well, you
35:00know, this situation is not exactly like that one, but there is some correlation to that
35:05one or these set of offices or, you know, that leadership issue.
35:10And you can kind of borrow from those pieces and then apply it.
35:14And I just, you know, again, this is an experiment, right?
35:17We're all experimenting with these relational dynamics.
35:20But for me, you know, I'm actually kind of enjoying.
35:23I mean, you know, I'm enjoying kind of like, you know, this is my own and my own, you
35:29know, myself 2.0, so to speak, in Sereno 2.0.
35:34That's my big challenge in all this part of the part of the privilege of getting an
35:39opportunity to do this is saying which Chris is showing up in each of these situations
35:43based upon my lessons and my past experiences.
35:46And how can he best come to solutions in managing communicate in a way that's going to,
35:53you know, be effective and be healthy?
35:56And so that's I know that's a lot to unpack there, but that's really how I'm trying to
36:01approach, you know, those kind of situations now.
36:04OK, Ryan.
36:06She's I think what I've learned is, is that I always if there's ever tension in a
36:11relationship or, you know, maybe a misunderstanding, I think once I, you know, gain
36:19perspective and self-awareness, the first thing I always ask is, what's my part in it?
36:23Right. And I think that so often, especially in professional relationships, if
36:28something's not right, they're always looking at what their other person is doing wrong
36:33and what they could be doing.
36:34And they're not, you know, but then you have to kind of I have to sit back and ask, OK,
36:39well, you know, what's my part in it?
36:42And is it the fact that I haven't communicated expectations or I haven't somehow or
36:47I'm carrying my own trip into the whole situation?
36:50And that's kind of making the dynamic funky, you know, and I think that was the lesson
36:55that that Chris and I learned from, you know, talking with the professional is that like
37:00I realized, like, who wants to work with me?
37:02Man, like, you know, Chris has to work with me.
37:04He has to put up with me.
37:06And I need to kind of manage myself like I can't expect him to change who he is because
37:11of me. And I need to kind of participate in the relationship in a way that I have to be
37:16self-aware and, you know, I have to be accountable to myself.
37:21And by doing so, that allows Chris to kind of flourish and be who he is.
37:25And and I think oftentimes that's our approach is that, OK, well, you know, as leaders,
37:31what did we not do and what is our part?
37:34And then we can kind of figure out how to get to whatever the solution is.
37:38And then as opposed to living in the problem, we live in the solution.
37:43And once we focus on the solution, typically things will work out.
37:47Yeah, that's great. Great advice.
37:50Well, Chris and Ryan, thank you so much for joining The Real Trending Podcast.
37:55Thank you, Tracy. I really appreciate it.
37:57This is awesome. Yeah.
37:58Thank you so much.
37:59Appreciate it. All right.
38:01Thanks. Take care.
38:02Thanks a lot.