Category
🎮️
GamingTranscript
00:00TAN troops led by Field Marshal Tannenberg retreat in the face of a crushing green onslaught.
00:16The capture of the elusive Tannenberg will mean the surrender of the TAN army and restore freedom to our world.
00:24Missing from the impending victory celebration is General Plastro.
00:28What has become of the demented dictator?
00:31Rumor has it that he has been trapped in the other world.
00:34A victim of plastrification.
00:37But what exactly is plastrification?
00:40Plastrification is a condition that occurs when too much time is spent in the other world.
00:46It's symptoms of the heartening of the limbs, known in Lehmann's terms as getting plastered.
00:52Fortunately, General Grimm and the brave soldiers of the Green Army have been successful in locating and destroying these dangerous portals as they mysteriously appear across the land.
01:03All confident and cocky, aren't we?
01:18Bragging to your sweethearts about your heroics and how you won the war, huh?
01:22No, sir.
01:23No, sir.
01:23No, sir.
01:24I can't hear you!
01:25No, sir!
01:26No, sir!
01:26No, sir!
01:26No, sir!
01:26No, sir!
01:26No, sir!
01:26No, sir!
01:26No, sir!
01:27No, sir!
01:27Let me assure you that this war is not over.
01:30Not until Sergeant Hawk says so.
01:33Not until every last TAN tank is destroyed.
01:37Yeah.
01:38Riff gonna play him a little tune in the Kia B for bazooka, baby.
01:43Not until every last TAN soldier is melted.
01:46Yes, Sarge. Scorch is gonna melt the tan into a bubble. Like that.
01:53Hoover!
01:53Gah!
01:54Not until you suck every last mine out of the ground, mister.
01:58But, but, but, but, I mean, yes, sir.
02:01And not until every last portal is destroyed. Are you listening, Shrab?
02:07Absolutely, dude.
02:08Um, don't call me dude.
02:12Okay.
02:13And not until Tannenberg is captured.
02:17You understand what I'm talking about, Vic?
02:19Oh, yeah, cause I, I mean, I remember the, okay, Tannen is bad, but green's good.
02:25Huh, right. Sarge, what?
02:27You got it, big guy.
02:29Okay, let's hear it!
02:31Bravo, Captain Rules!
02:34Hooray!
02:35Cause we're them!
02:43This is Bravo, Leader One. Do you copy?
02:46Nuts!
02:47The portal should be just across that field. You ready?
02:50I'm with you, man. Let's turn on the bruised machine.
02:53What a fabulous green hunk.
03:16Portal destroyed, sir.
03:17I, I, I, I, hi, Vicky.
03:22Any sign of Tannenberg?
03:24Uh, no, Colonel. He, he wasn't there.
03:26But his forces were dug in pretty deep, sir.
03:28I don't understand how the Tan can survive in the big world for so long without getting plastered.
03:34Neither do we.
03:35But we suspect they've developed some means of counteracting the effects.
03:38General Plastro, at last I've found you.
03:53Oh, what would you give to move again?
03:58What would you give to speak again?
04:00I, I, I'm, I'm alive, I'm, I'm, I'm, oh, oh, oh, oh, cramp, cramp, ouchie, ouchie!
04:15Yes, Plastro. My anti-plastrification serum has brought you back.
04:20Uh, really? Let me see that.
04:25Oh, my. Oh, this is marvelous. Is there more?
04:29More than we could ever use. Enough to carry us to victory.
04:34Yes, victory! I, yo, did you say us?
04:38Oh, come on now, darling.
04:42Surely the ruler of the entire world can afford one favor in exchange for such a powerful secret.
04:49Oh, one favor, you say?
04:52Well, what could such a delectable creature as you possibly want from me?
04:59It. All.
05:04Oh.
05:15Looks like they're still generating serum on the other side of the portal.
05:20Well, time to crash their party.
05:22Who needs a vast and loyal army when I've got weapons like those?
05:36I must get to that arsenal.
05:39The question is, how?
05:42Just follow me.
05:44Okay.
05:45Whoa! New action figures! Oh, boy!
06:02Oh, my. I think I'm going to cry.
06:08How do we get all these beautiful, destructive things back to our world?
06:14Why do you have thought of, darling?
06:16Oh, this is too magnificent.
06:17My luck has finally changed for the better!
06:20Perhaps our luck can change for the better.
06:24Oh, yes. Yes, right. Old habit. Sorry.
06:25Listen.
06:26I have a plan.
06:29You're going to like this.
06:30Where was I?
06:31Yes, go.
06:32Yes, go.
06:32Yes, go.
06:39Come here, Sergeant Hawk. Come in. This is Vicki.
06:42Vicki, I'm a little busy right now.
06:45I located Dr. Madden in the serum. I'm in his castle.
06:48You're what?
06:49You...
06:49Vicki, you disobeyed the colonel's orders?
06:52Come on, Hawk. You knew I wasn't going to sit around while you and the boys had all the fun.
06:56No, stay put. We're on our way.
07:00She's just itching for another rescue.
07:08Oh, guards, guards. I want those.
07:11Those, sir?
07:13Yes, little man. Those!
07:15They will be my elite shock troopers.
07:19Nothing will stop us!
07:21Nothing!
07:23Today, this toy store!
07:25Tomorrow, the world!
07:28The world!
07:29Perfect, yes. It's perfect.
07:31Can have a big day tomorrow.
07:33Someone make me a sandwich.
07:36Colonel, Vicki and I just had a horrible thought, sir.
07:40If this serum can reverse the effects of plastification, what's to prevent them from finding and reviving plastro?
07:45Well, we may have this wall wrapped up before they can find him.
07:49What?
07:50What? How?
07:50We've just verified information taken from an informant that identifies the location of Field Marshal Tannenberg.
07:57If we capture him, the war will be over.
08:00Who's this informant?
08:01I have seen him myself, gentlemen.
08:05My name is Bridget Blue, intelligence operative for the Blue Resistance.
08:13And who are you, my rugged darling?
08:15Sergeant Sock. Sergeant Tock.
08:17Listen up.
08:18We will assault Tannenberg's secret base tomorrow.
08:21Excuse me.
08:22Excuse me.
08:22I will let you get back to this important work.
08:26Perhaps we can meet again, Sergeant Tock.
08:29Maybe in a warmer setting.
08:32I...
08:33Oh.
08:34Ladies and gentlemen, you are watching history in the making.
08:41In moments when Field Marshal Tannenberg signs the surrender papers.
08:45The war will be over.
08:52No, no, no.
08:53Shoot the green black soldiers.
08:56Nice, thank you.
08:58Sergeant Tock, take your men through that portal and find Plastro.
09:26It's our only chance.
09:28Time to crash their party.
09:43Great.
09:51My, my, my.
09:52That is a nice one, isn't it?
09:54Paint my name on the side of that.
09:56Big letters.
09:58I want the world to know who's responsible for ravaging the green nation.
10:04You know he's insane.
10:05I began to suspect it when he found you attractive.
10:08Then, when the green nation has been sufficient to rubble, we'll roll on to the red nation.
10:11The orange nation.
10:13The blue nation.
10:13The blue nation.
10:15Blue nation.
10:16Amazing one.
10:16We just received word that the, uh, the bedroom command post has fallen to Sergeant Hawk and his Bravo company commandos.
10:23I mean...
10:23What?
10:23How can this...
10:25This thing?
10:26Isn't this about the time when the bad guy starts to get his?
10:30You were in charge of the bedroom command.
10:32This is all your fault.
10:34My fault?
10:35You was the one who let Sergeant Hawk escape from the treaty sign.
10:38Hey, don't you think you should quit arguing and get back to what you were doing?
10:42What was it again?
10:44Oh, yeah.
10:45Pillaging the blue nation?
10:46Yes, darling.
10:48Tell me about your plans for destroying my homeland.
10:52Oh, now, honey bumps.
10:54She's turning this all around.
10:56I never said anything about destroying the blue nation.
10:58Why, the blue nation is yours.
11:00It's...
11:00And it's a lovely shade, too.
11:02Now, why don't you take a squad of my troopers to the bedroom outpost and deal with Sergeant Hawk before he ruins everything?
11:09Is that an order, darling?
11:11Yes, that's an order!
11:12Sir, I'm the general, and I get to give the orders!
11:17Say please.
11:18Yes, please, please, please, please, pretty please, with cherries and diamonds and a brand new yacht on top.
11:22Now, will you just go?
11:24Okay, darling.
11:25Just this once.
11:29Burn it all.
11:30Starting with a blasted blue homeland.
11:33Plastro, how could you?
11:35Well, someone's not paying attention.
11:37I'm the bad guy?
11:42That low-down fam, she set us up!
11:47Sergeant Hawk, I so much hoped I would see you.
11:57Stow the charm, lady.
11:59I see you for what you are.
12:00A low-down, no-goat.
12:02I'm only gonna ask you once.
12:08Where's Plastro?
12:09Sergeant Hawk, dude!
12:10We just heard, like, over the radio?
12:12Plastro's launched a way big assault on the Blue Nation.
12:15What?
12:16You're lying?
12:17I'm afraid it's the truth.
12:20The Blue Nation is under siege as we speak.
12:23I will take you to Plastro under one condition.
12:26You must promise me that you will first save my homeland.
12:29Don't trust her, Colonel.
12:30It's a trick.
12:38You think I'm heartless.
12:40But I'm not.
12:42I am capable of remorse.
12:44I'll just stuff the crying ploy and lead us to Plastro.
12:48I am not as bad as you think, Sergeant.
12:51Yeah, yeah, I know, lady.
12:54You're just molded that way.
13:08So, Sergeant Hawk and the Bravo Company commandos have reached a great wall.
13:12So, they've brought the war to us, eh?
13:15I want those missiles targeted on all non-tan cities.
13:20I'll end this war even if it means vaporizing the entire world.
13:24No, Plastro, please!
13:27If you do that, there will be nothing left for you to rule.
13:31Oh, you.
13:32Look around.
13:33This place is a hundred times the size of that puny world.
13:37There's so much to conquer here.
13:39Why, I get excited just thinking about it.
13:42I thought that a brilliant dictator like you was always on the lookout for treachery,
13:48but I guess I was wrong.
13:50What are you talking about?
13:52Your precious Brigitte Blue betrayed you when you attacked her country.
13:56Why, that treacherous, conniving little trollop, that's my trick!
14:00She stole that maneuver from me!
14:03Oh, thank goodness I've got you to look out for me, my pet.
14:06You know, I've been thinking for some time now that there is one thing that I still lack.
14:13Behind every strong man is a strong woman.
14:16And you are so very, very strong.
14:18Oh, Plastro, that's sweet, really.
14:22But frankly, I'd rather get plastered than marry you.
14:25Oh, I'm not asking you to marry me.
14:27Oh, good.
14:28Because for a moment...
14:29I'm telling you, you will marry me.
14:32Guards, put my bride-to-be in the holding cell while I oversee the destruction of the world.
14:38You'll regret this.
14:39I'll nag you.
14:40I'll get fat and ugly.
14:42I'll run your credit cards to the limit.
14:48What the hell?
14:52Vicky!
14:57I don't know how you managed to get yourself into these messes, girl.
15:08You know, this is getting to become a habit.
15:10Maybe if I just left you in there, you'd stay out of trouble.
15:12What do you think?
15:13You can't leave me in here!
15:14Plastro wants to marry me!
15:16Still?
15:16I figured after a couple hours that you're nagging, he'd...
15:19Just get me out of the...
15:20Hey!
15:25We've got to stop meeting like this.
15:27Come on!
15:28Plastro is preparing a rocket attack against every major city in the world.
15:32Well, why didn't you say so sooner?
15:33Come on, we've got a train to catch!
15:40Follow me.
15:41I will lead you to Plastro's headquarters myself.
15:43Dude, what?
15:44But, but...
15:44You're a bad guy!
15:47Brave Private Hoover.
15:49You wound me.
15:50I am unarmed.
15:52Please, let me redeem myself.
15:55Hey!
15:56If you can't trust a hot chick these days, who can you trust?
16:00How touching.
16:01Whoa!
16:02Okay, this sucks.
16:04Oh, please.
16:08Hey, Rip.
16:09Hey, Rip.
16:10Where do you think everybody is or whatever?
16:13Man, you got me.
16:14Let's just keep our eyes peeled.
16:16You know what I'm saying?
16:17Keep our eyes peeled!
16:18I can't believe you let them destroy the surplus missiles!
16:36I swear, I'll get...
16:38Hello, darling.
16:40Miss me?
16:41Oh, go, sugar cookie.
16:44You're alive!
16:46Oh, yes.
16:48Very much.
16:50And so is Sergeant Hawk.
16:53That is, of course.
16:54Unless you're ready to renegotiate our terms.
16:57Oh, there's your fiancée.
17:02Yeah, and he's with your girlfriend.
17:05Come on, we still have to stop those rockets that got through the portal.
17:08You gotta stop those rockets on your own.
17:10I'm going after that helicopter.
17:12Usually you want me to stay put.
17:14Does this mean that the brave Sergeant Hawk actually needs help from a girl?
17:18Well, not just any girl.
17:21Be careful.
17:27I want you back in one pace here.
17:29You worry too much.
17:31Phew.
17:33Gotta love a girl who'll chase down a trainload of rockets for you.
17:36Well, well, well.
17:52If it isn't Sergeant Hawk, how very nice of you and your jaw to join us.
17:56Give it up, Plastro.
17:58You're finished.
17:59Oh, please.
18:00You don't really believe that, do you?
18:02I have only just begun.
18:03First, I think you'll start to show with some fireworks.
18:08Let her go.
18:10Be careful, Sergeant.
18:11It is a trap.
18:12This isn't time, Sergeant Hawk.
18:14Will you come after me or save the damsel?
18:17I know how soft you are when it comes to watching a woman die.
18:23Of all the things to be right about,
18:27let us have to be right about that.
18:33You are such a brave man, Sergeant Hawk.
18:42Listen, do you know where the commandos are?
18:44Yes.
18:46Yes, I do.
18:47And very shortly, you enjoy them.
18:50While developing a serum to fight the effects of blastrification,
18:57we also developed a serum that causes blastrification.
19:01You treacherous double-dealing...
19:04I know you will never forgive me,
19:06but please know that I am truly sorry.
19:10We are not that different, you and I.
19:13No, you're not like me.
19:15Everybody knows whose side I'm on.
19:19Everyone should know whose side I'm on, too.
19:22My own.
19:32Not so tough now, are we?
19:35I do believe your friends look like they want to play.
19:41Do you want to play, Sergeant Hawk?
19:44Yes, yes, yes, you do.
19:47And oh my, we are going to have such fun.
19:52Let the games begin.
19:55Let the games begin.
19:55Don't you think that's enough now, darling?
20:18Perhaps you should stop now.
20:19No, that's not enough.
20:21The game isn't over until they're all dead.
20:23What just happened?
20:40What was that?
20:41No, they'll ruin my high score.
20:55Let it go!
20:56Okay, Plastro.
21:14It's just you and me now.
21:17Mano a mano.
21:19Thank goodness.
21:20I was so afraid he was going to kill you in there.
21:23I tried to stop him, but...
21:24That does it!
21:30Well, I could watch this all day, but...
21:33Sorry to rain on your victory parade, Sergeant Hawk.
21:36I, uh, hope you didn't think I was out of tricks just yet.
21:39Destroy them!
21:52Hawk, what are we going to do?
21:54Working on it.
21:55Oh, weasels.
21:56This is it.
21:58I knew this day would come sooner than later.
22:00We're doomed here.
22:02Put a lid on it, private.
22:03It ain't over until Sergeant Hawk says so.
22:05What is that?
22:20That is not one of mine.
22:21What is going on?
22:23Well, that's how much for that scheme.
22:38Okay, you twisted mutant freak.
22:41You've had this coming.
22:43Not the face!
22:46Ah, nuts!
22:48Guess you'll have to postpone that world destruction plan of yours indefinitely.
22:56Yes, yes, yes, blah, blah, blah.
22:58Well, I would have gotten away with it.
22:59If it weren't for those meddling commandos.
23:02I hate green.
23:04You're thinking about Bridget?
23:06She saved my bacon in that pinball machine.
23:09And you saved her homeland.
23:10I think you're more than even.
23:18One day, dear Hawk, we shall be together.
23:25And this time, no one will come between us.