MJTV: What Grosses Out Your Spouse? MJ Say's Michelle Hates It When He Does This!
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00:00That's gross! Stop! Don't do that in my house!
00:02That is so white trash!
00:07I gotta talk about something.
00:10This grosses Michelle out, and I want to know if anyone else does this,
00:15but Michelle, I try not to do it where she can see me, but she...
00:19Clip your toenails.
00:20No, no, she caught...
00:21Michelle caught me red-handed last night.
00:27Michelle hates when I do this.
00:30And she's like, that is so gross!
00:33That is so white trash!
00:35That's what she says.
00:37Oh, yeah, she...
00:38There's...
00:39And I try to do this out of sight.
00:42Do you think I could go to phone lines and let listeners guess,
00:44or would this be totally dangerous?
00:46I mean, it really sounds dangerous,
00:48because everything I thought when you originally got started,
00:50I don't think is the case anymore.
00:53Yeah, at first I was going like Jeffrey Toobin.
00:58Come on, Froggy!
01:00Knock it off!
01:00To classify something as being white trash is really a broad spectrum.
01:04All right, so Michelle caught me last night.
01:07Oh!
01:08And she hates this, and she's like,
01:12don't do that!
01:13That is so white trash!
01:15And she says that every single time.
01:17White trash is very judgy, first of all.
01:19Oh, oh, oh!
01:20Don't you dare do that in my house!
01:23Is it like...
01:23I think white trash is racist.
01:25All right, now I...
01:26I did something, and I do this occasionally.
01:31Michelle hates when I do this.
01:33Lost your teeth at the dinner table.
01:35Ew!
01:35Should I...
01:37You know what?
01:38Let me give you a hint.
01:39I do this sometimes with a shirt on,
01:42and sometimes I'll do it with a shirt off.
01:45Have sex.
01:46All right.
01:47You know what?
01:47I'm going to take a...
01:48I'm going to go to phones on this.
01:49I'm going to go to phones.
01:50I thought you were asking the question.
01:51That's white trash, Froggy.
01:52Terrible guess.
01:53I'm going to go to phones on this.
01:54What do I occasionally do?
01:58And I try to do it away from Michelle,
02:00but she caught me last night.
02:02What...
02:02And listen, it's not dirty, folks.
02:04So don't call up with, like, filthy things here.
02:07It's not dirty, all right?
02:08I don't want to dump any callers.
02:10But I'd love to go to phones here.
02:12What do you think it is?
02:13What do I do that Michelle hates?
02:15She yells at me.
02:16She says it's white trash.
02:17All right.
02:18800-990-1047.
02:20What do you think I do that aggravates Michelle
02:25and she'll let me have it?
02:26I know what it is.
02:27Are you a nipple pitcher?
02:29What do you say?
02:30No.
02:31Do you pinch your nipples?
02:32Well, Froggy, what are you...
02:34Stop!
02:34What are you saying?
02:36All right.
02:36All right.
02:37Stop!
02:37Stop!
02:38All right.
02:38800.
02:39Look at the phones.
02:40What do you say, Fester?
02:42With the information we have,
02:43Froggy had a legitimate guess.
02:45Sometimes you do it with your shirt on.
02:47Sometimes you do it with your shirt off.
02:48That's the only info we have to go on.
02:50All right.
02:50Let me take calls here.
02:51All right.
02:51The phones...
02:52What do you say, Fester?
02:54No.
02:55His guess is valid.
02:56All right.
02:56All right.
02:56800-990-1047.
02:59Every line is ringing.
03:00I can picture you taking a piece of your chest hair,
03:03your body hair,
03:04and running your fingernails over it
03:06and trying to curl it like a Christmas ribbon.
03:08What?
03:09What's the matter with your...
03:10I don't know.
03:11All right.
03:12Roxanne, you're drunk right now.
03:15Do you do that with your hair?
03:16You try to make curly ribbons?
03:18All right.
03:18He does it with Doug's hair.
03:19Doug has no hair.
03:21All right.
03:22800-990-1047.
03:25Let's see if folks can guess
03:26what I got caught doing last night
03:29that Michelle has yelled at me
03:30probably a couple dozen times over our marriage.
03:33800-990-1047.
03:35Every single phone line is illuminated.
03:39Let us go to the phones and see if any of the listeners can guess.
03:44And if they don't, then I will reveal it
03:46or I will maybe call Michelle.
03:49Yeah.
03:50I'll give the folks in the chat room on the MJTV something to talk about.
03:55By the way, I guess there's a drinking game that whenever I call Michelle,
03:59they comment on MJTV chat notes.
04:02All right.
04:02Let me grab...
04:03They take a shot.
04:04Yeah.
04:04How about we start with, let's see, Lisa in Tampa.
04:09Lisa, you're on the MJ Morning Show, flying blinds here.
04:13What do you think that I do that drives Michelle nuts and she says it's gross and calls me names?
04:19I'm going out on a limb, but I'm going to say you use some cutlery to scratch your back.
04:25I use cutlery to scratch my back.
04:30That's a good guess.
04:31Like I'll grab a knife or I'll grab some type of kitchen utensil to like...
04:36That's a good way to lose them all.
04:37A wooden spoon, anything you got.
04:40You know, that is incorrect.
04:44That is incorrect.
04:46But I'll tell you, listen, that is a good guess.
04:49That is a fantastic guess, but that is incorrect.
04:53A serving fork makes a great back scratch.
04:55You are incorrect.
04:56And then Fester puts it in the green beans at Thanksgiving dinner.
05:01This tastes delicious.
05:02What's your secret?
05:03Oh, I got something in my teeth.
05:04What is this?
05:05Is this a mole?
05:06It's Fester's back hair.
05:09All right.
05:11Let me go to Linda.
05:12Linda's in Newport Ridge.
05:14Linda, you're on the MJ Morning Show.
05:16What does Michelle yell at me about?
05:19I'm going to say cook.
05:22Cook?
05:22Like cook?
05:23Don't you dare cook in my house?
05:25That's white trashy?
05:27Well, like if you have no shirt on.
05:29Oh, cooking with no...
05:31Oh, I did say that sometimes I wear a shirt and sometimes I don't wear a shirt.
05:38Good guess, but incorrect.
05:41Actually, we're getting some pretty good guesses here.
05:43Let me go with Justin in Tampa.
05:45Justin, you're on the MJ Morning Show.
05:47What did I do last night and I've done before that drives Michelle nuts and she yells at me,
05:51don't do that in my house?
05:52Got a guess?
05:54Yeah, you pick the lint out of your belly button.
05:57Pick lint?
05:58Pick lint out of my...
05:59Incorrect.
06:01Listen, we're getting some good guesses here.
06:03I can't do that with a shirt on.
06:04How about Joe?
06:04How old are you?
06:05Joe's in North Carolina.
06:07Hey, Joe, you're on the MJ Morning Show.
06:08Go ahead.
06:09Hey, that last caller took my guess, so can I give a shout out to Rachel the Flying Tomato?
06:13Oh, yeah.
06:14Yeah, Rachel the Flying Tomato.
06:15She's probably...
06:16She loves the show.
06:16Rachel is in our digital media department here and she listens every morning.
06:22All right, Joe, sorry that he took your guess.
06:23Have a great day.
06:24Why'd you shout out to Rachel?
06:27That's so weird.
06:28He's a big fan, Froggy.
06:30He's a big fan.
06:32Let me grab Tommy at MacDill.
06:35Tommy, you're on the MJ Morning Show.
06:37What did Michelle yell at me about last night?
06:39Me and my brother...
06:40Hold on, I had the phone down.
06:42Go ahead.
06:42I'm sorry, go ahead.
06:44Me and my brother have been doing it for years.
06:45Are you picking cotton out of your belly button?
06:48Oh, no.
06:49Again, that's...
06:49It's not that.
06:52Nope.
06:52It's not belly button lint.
06:54All right, Charles in Holiday.
06:56Charles, you're on the MJ Morning Show.
06:58So, what'd I get yelled at about?
07:00Smell your armpits.
07:02Smell my armpits?
07:03No.
07:04Good guess.
07:04A lot of texters have been guessing that.
07:05That would have been my guess.
07:06That's what I had in mind.
07:07What, like Mary Catherine Gallagher?
07:11And when I get nervous, I'm like...
07:13Nope, that's not it.
07:14Let me grab...
07:15Is it Tana?
07:18Tiana.
07:19I can't see.
07:20The print is so damn small.
07:21Hey, Andrew, can you try to make the call screener print larger than, like, two-point font?
07:26Uh, Tiana in Lakeland, you're on the MJ Morning Show.
07:30Hi.
07:31Hi.
07:32How are you?
07:32We are well.
07:33Any idea?
07:35One of two things.
07:37You either crack your knuckles or you pass gas in front of her.
07:44Nope.
07:44We're getting good guesses here.
07:46Jimmy in Wesley Chapel.
07:48Jimmy, what do I do occasionally?
07:50Michelle caught me last night that grosses her out, and she yelled at me.
07:56You trim your nose hair.
07:59No, but a good guess.
08:03Let's see.
08:04You put guacamole in your belly button and then eat chips out of your belly button like a dip?
08:08Hey, we did take out tacos and guacamole from Donia's Kitchen last night on Kennedy,
08:13and it was fantastic, and Chloe did get their homemade guacamole, but no, it wasn't in my belly button.
08:20All right, Catherine in Sarasota.
08:22Man, I'm trying to get a guess here.
08:25I'm going to have to stop it in just a moment.
08:27What a hit.
08:28I feel like Froggy's right.
08:29All right, Catherine, you're on the MJ Morning Show in Sarasota.
08:32What do you think?
08:33I'm going to take a stab at it.
08:35Either you don't wash dishes correctly or you brush your hair at the table.
08:41Nope.
08:42Incorrect.
08:43Yes, is that hair?
08:44Holy moly.
08:45How about Joe in Clearwater?
08:48Hi, Joe.
08:49You're on the MJ Morning Show.
08:51Good morning, sir.
08:52I'm going to say go to the bathroom.
08:55Nope.
08:56I have a guess.
08:57I have a guess, Joe.
08:59How about Chad in Tampa?
09:02Hey, no more.
09:03This is the last one.
09:05I know what it is.
09:05What is your guess?
09:07It is Chad in Tampa.
09:08Go ahead, Chad.
09:11All right.
09:12Chad, are you there?
09:14Thank you, Chad, for nothing.
09:15Yeah, yeah.
09:16Yeah, Chad, what is grossing Michelle out that she yelled at me about last night?
09:21Cutting on the counter without using a cutting board.
09:23Cutting on the counter without using a cutting board.
09:26I don't know if that would qualify as white trashy.
09:28All right, folks.
09:29All right.
09:31Calling up Michelle.
09:34Are people starting the drinking game in the MJ TV chat room?
09:38I'm having one.
09:39It's calling Michelle again.
09:41Hey, Michelle.
09:42Michelle?
09:43Yeah.
09:44I don't think you heard this, because I think I just woke you up during the commercial break
09:47to say, hey, I'm going to call you.
09:49Yeah.
09:49So you didn't hear the callers all guessing on what you yelled at me about last night,
09:54right?
09:54No.
09:55No.
09:56Now, I believe you've been yelling at me since we lived together, when you've spotted me
10:03doing this, what you consider as grossness.
10:06I fail to see it that way.
10:07Well, because you're just gross.
10:13I think I know what it is now.
10:15All right.
10:15Now, something that I do, I don't think it's that bad.
10:20If Michelle catches me...
10:21It's not the grossest thing that you do.
10:23Right.
10:24Quite honestly.
10:24Because it just is disgusting.
10:26All right.
10:26So Michelle, when she catches me, she yells at me, don't do that in my house.
10:32That is gross.
10:33That is nasty.
10:34That is so white trash.
10:36MJ, can I ask a question?
10:37Yeah.
10:38Are you holding something when this happens?
10:40No.
10:41Damn it.
10:42I'm holding...
10:43Damn.
10:45I'm not holding anything.
10:47I thought you were drinking out of, like, the orange juice carton.
10:50Nope.
10:51No, no, no.
10:51So I've done this wearing a shirt, and I've done this not wearing a shirt.
10:58And Michelle, I believe you caught me shirtless doing this last night.
11:02Yeah.
11:03All right, Michelle, without any further ado, we ought to be like one of those game shows
11:13where they have, like, 30 seconds of suspense music, you know?
11:16Whatever it is, it sounds horrendous.
11:18All right.
11:19Michelle, what did I do last night that you called white trashy?
11:24The big reveal, ladies and gentlemen.
11:27Scratching your back on the corner of, like, a wall or...
11:31What?
11:31...wherever there's...
11:32Oh, it's so disgusting.
11:33That's weird.
11:34What are you, a bear?
11:35Thank you, Mark, man.
11:36It's so gross.
11:38You just rub yourself against trees?
11:40Yes, I'm a bear.
11:46So, you know what bears do in the woods.
11:48All right, so...
11:49Dude.
11:50All right, can you get the...
11:52Can you get the mental...
11:53You need a scrush brush.
11:55All right.
11:55Can you get the mental picture here?
11:58You find, you know, where two walls come together, you know, the perpendicular meeting of the corner of a wall,
12:06and you got the bead, or sometimes you have the metal, you know, strip that's put into the drywall,
12:11and when I get a back itch that I can't get,
12:17I'll just kind of back up to a wall and put my back right on that corner and scratch my back.
12:27That is barbaric.
12:28All right, hold on.
12:29All right, Fester, have you ever done that?
12:31I don't think a day goes by that I don't do that.
12:34Look at that.
12:35Absolutely.
12:35All right, Froggy.
12:36Have you ever done the back scratch?
12:40Yeah, and do you remember that guy?
12:42You remember the...
12:44The...
12:44What's his name?
12:46UFO boy.
12:47The Healy guy.
12:48Yeah, UFO guy.
12:49He invented a piece of wood that you put on the corner.
12:55Fester, you remember this?
12:56Okay, he didn't invent a piece of wood, Froggy.
12:58It was a bare back scratcher.
13:01He took a log, and he notched out a 45-degree angle so you can put a log on a corner of your house and scratch your back on a bear on bark.
13:10So, Michelle, what...
13:12That was brilliant.
13:13Michelle, what is it about this?
13:15Listen, since we started living together, which would have been, what, 1993?
13:21Because you moved in with me in West Palm when I was still working at 95.5 in West Palm before I was hired by the power pig.
13:30And how many times have you spotted me doing this over nearly 28 years of marriage?
13:36Too many.
13:37All right.
13:38First of all, I'm really not a fan of the shirtless thing around the house.
13:41Like, that already is something I'm like, ugh.
13:44Right?
13:44Disgusting.
13:44My grandfather would never do that.
13:47Ever.
13:48Ever.
13:48What does that tell you, MJ?
13:50Your wife just said you in a shirtless makes her go, ugh.
13:53Hey, listen, late at night, I kind of like taking the shirt off.
13:57It just, it feels...
13:59Late at night?
13:5910.30 when you come home from the morning show.
14:02Okay, sometimes I do it then.
14:03No, it's like, I just feel, it feels cool.
14:05You know, not like, eh, I'm cool.
14:06Look at me, I'm cool.
14:07No, no, it's not that.
14:08I mean, I feel cool.
14:10All right, so...
14:11Showing up my boobs.
14:12So, last night...
14:14But it's gross, it's gross because when you're doing that, I'm just envisioning that you're
14:18leaving all kinds of, like, body crud.
14:21Oh, my God.
14:23All right, so...
14:23Michelle, didn't you say he scratches his crotch the same way?
14:26Why will you stop it?
14:27No, I don't.
14:28All right, so I occasionally, when I can't reach an itch on the back, I'll back up to the corner
14:34of a wall, and I'll do the back, and Michelle hates it.
14:38She saw me last night, she's like, that's gross, stop, don't do that in my house.
14:41That is so white trash.
14:44I think white trash is a little too much.
14:46Yeah, well, I mean, come on.
14:48He's just shirtless rubbing his body against the house.
14:51Next thing you know, I'll be in handcuffs, being taken out of a double white and seffner
14:56with ragu spaghetti sauce stains on a wife beater, being put into the back of it.
15:00I love him.
15:01But I love him!
15:03Don't take him.
15:04Please don't take him away, I love him.
15:06All right, Michelle.
15:07So, yeah, I scratch my back on a corner of a wall, and Michelle hates it.
15:11That is the grossness that I got pinched on last night.
15:14That is the grossness that I got pinched on last night.