TV-G | 30min | Comedy, Drama, Family, Music, TV Series | Episode aired 22 January 1964
A French teenager writes a best-selling book. Patty thinks she can do the same in America. An unscrupulous book publisher gets involved.
Director: Stanley Prager
Writers: Sidney Sheldon, William Asher
Stars: Patty Duke, William Schallert, Jean Byron
A French teenager writes a best-selling book. Patty thinks she can do the same in America. An unscrupulous book publisher gets involved.
Director: Stanley Prager
Writers: Sidney Sheldon, William Asher
Stars: Patty Duke, William Schallert, Jean Byron
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Can I have the movie section, Popo? I want to see what's on tonight.
00:06I can tell you what's on tonight. Homework.
00:08Who needs it?
00:09You do. I saw your report card. You almost failed geometry, young lady. I think it's
00:15about time you learned a triangle is not necessarily a situation involving two men and a girl.
00:21Geometry's a big, fat drag. Even Kathy's not good at it.
00:25Geometry's a brain's brain. Right, Kath?
00:30Kathy, what are you reading?
00:32The Francois Stupard book.
00:35You mean that 16-year-old French girl?
00:37She may only be 16, but she's really lived. No wonder it's number one on the bestseller list.
00:42Good book?
00:43Marvelous, Uncle Martin.
00:45Picture's on the front of one of the magazines around here. Here it is.
00:56Imagine that. Only 16 years old and she's the toast of Paris.
01:02It says here she's a symbol of teenage freedom over there.
01:05All the kids are copying her hairstyles. They even named a street after her.
01:10No wonder. She just sold her book to the movies for $200,000.
01:16That's wonderful.
01:17I hope they hurry and make the movie.
01:19What's the book about?
01:22About life, with a capital L, seen through the eyes of a teenage girl.
01:27Let me see that.
01:32My first dance was an unforgettable experience.
01:35Pierre was tall and shy and awkward.
01:39He had just learned to drive.
01:41It took all my powers of persuasion to get Father to allow Pierre to drive me to the dance.
01:45We got into the car and drove off.
01:47We had gone only a block when Pierre ran into a car that was turning the corner.
01:52In the other car was Father.
01:54Hey, that happened to you when Richard first got in his car.
01:57Yeah, I know. I still have the bruises.
01:59This stuff is a bestseller?
02:01I can write stuff like this.
02:03You can write stuff like what?
02:05Like this Francoise Dupar.
02:07And there's no competition.
02:09There are no teenagers writing novels today.
02:12Well, that may be true.
02:13That's why Francoise Dupar's book became a bestseller.
02:15Because she's a teenager.
02:17Patty, the critics don't care how old you are.
02:20It's what you have to say.
02:22I have a lot to say.
02:24What would you write about?
02:27Me.
02:29Life with a capital L.
02:33I've even got the title.
02:35I was a teenage teenager.
02:38Patty, writing requires a great deal of discipline.
02:41I mean, it would mean giving up dates, movies.
02:43I need a place to work where I can be completely undisturbed.
02:46I know.
02:48I'll work in the garret.
02:50The garret?
02:51I think she means the attic.
02:54I don't think you can work up there, dear.
02:56It's dirty and dusty and a mess.
02:58Gee, that sounds like your room.
03:00Sounds perfect.
03:02After all,
03:04to create,
03:06you must suffer.
03:13Francoise,
03:15move over.
03:44I'm sorry.
03:45I'm sorry.
03:46I'm sorry.
03:47I'm sorry.
03:48I'm sorry.
03:49I'm sorry.
03:50I'm sorry.
03:51I'm sorry.
03:52I'm sorry.
03:53I'm sorry.
03:54I'm sorry.
03:55I'm sorry.
03:56I'm sorry.
03:57I'm sorry.
03:58I'm sorry.
03:59I'm sorry.
04:00I'm sorry.
04:01I'm sorry.
04:02I'm sorry.
04:03I'm sorry.
04:04I'm sorry.
04:05I'm sorry.
04:06I'm sorry.
04:07I'm sorry.
04:08I'm sorry.
04:09I'm sorry.
04:10I'm sorry.
04:11I'm sorry.
04:12I'm sorry.
04:13I'm sorry.
04:14I'm sorry.
04:15I'm sorry.
04:16I'm sorry.
04:17I'm sorry.
04:18I'm sorry.
04:19I'm sorry.
04:20I'm sorry.
04:21I'm sorry.
04:22I'm sorry.
04:23I'm sorry.
04:24I'm sorry.
04:25I'm sorry.
04:26I'm sorry.
04:27I'm sorry.
04:28I'm sorry.
04:29I'm sorry.
04:30I'm sorry.
04:31I'm sorry.
04:32I'm sorry.
04:33I'm sorry.
04:34I'm sorry.
04:35I'm sorry.
04:36I'm sorry.
04:37I'm sorry.
04:38I'm sorry.
04:39I'm sorry.
04:40I'm sorry.
04:41I'm sure you'll be alright up here.
04:43Louisa May Alcott never complained.
04:46Everything I want is right here.
04:48If there's anything I can do to help, Patty.
04:51Nothing, thank you.
04:53Creation is the bird of loneliness.
04:56Good luck.
04:58It has nothing to do with luck.
05:00It's pure talent.
05:11I was a teenage teenager by Patti Lane, a teenager.
05:33Early one morning, I...
05:47Early one afternoon, I...
06:16Early one night.
06:17Hello, darling.
06:18Hi, Mom.
06:19How was school?
06:20Fine.
06:21Did a package come for me?
06:22Yes.
06:24It's me.
06:25Jenny.
06:26Hi, Mom.
06:27How was school?
06:28Fine.
06:29Jenny, I thought of you while I was driving here.
06:57Did you, Bernardo?
07:02What made you think of me?
07:08On the road was a sign that said, soft shoulders.
07:13Oh, Bernardo, you have the drollest sense of humor.
07:23Hello, Richard.
07:27Where's Patti?
07:28Up in the attic working on her book.
07:29Do you know I've been waiting an hour for her at the bowling alley?
07:30That's the third date she's broken in a row.
07:31Oh, she probably forgot about it.
07:32That's a fine excuse.
07:33Well, she's gonna have to choose.
07:34It's either her career or me.
07:35Did you say she was up in the attic?
07:36I don't think she wants to be disturbed.
07:37Well, she's gonna be.
07:38I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
07:39I'm sorry.
07:40I'm sorry.
07:41I'm sorry.
07:42I'm sorry.
07:43I'm sorry.
07:44I'm sorry.
07:45I'm sorry.
07:46I'm sorry.
07:47I'm sorry.
07:48I'm sorry.
07:49I'm sorry.
07:50I'm sorry.
07:51I'm sorry.
07:52I'm sorry.
07:53I'm sorry.
07:55Another reason the road reminded me of you, Jenny.
07:59You have dangerous curves.
08:03Jenny gives a peal of laughter.
08:07What are you laughing at?
08:09Bernardo just said something funny.
08:12Where is he?
08:14He's in my book.
08:15He has the most marvelous sense of humor.
08:17When are you gonna finish that, Patti?
08:19I've been out bowling by myself and you've been up here laughing by yourself.
08:23It doesn't make sense.
08:25It will make sense when my book is finished.
08:30I'm going to do for the American teenager what Francoise did for the French teenager.
08:37What did she do for them?
08:39She liberated them.
08:41She made the world look at them in a new light.
08:44Well, how long is this liberation gonna take?
08:47Well, what if you don't write a bestseller overnight?
08:50Might take me another week.
08:53Here's your dinner, Patti.
08:55What's the matter? Didn't Louisa May Alcott eat?
08:59What happened?
09:05I just murdered Reginald.
09:08I just murdered Reginald.
09:20Hey, Patti, it's 12 o'clock.
09:23I just have to finish this chapter.
09:29Did you write all that?
09:31That's the prologue.
09:33You gotta call it, Gone With The Wind?
09:36I thought I'd let the publisher choose the title.
09:41Honey, you know, it isn't all that easy to get something published.
09:45I guess if it were, everybody'd write a book.
09:49What I'm trying to say is that I really wouldn't count too much on this if I were you.
09:55Papo, will you be home this Saturday?
09:59Well, I think so. Why?
10:01I'm gonna be through with the book by then.
10:02Would you read it?
10:04Sure, sure, I'd love to.
10:07Thanks.
10:09Well, all right, you finish up and get to bed, huh?
10:12Good night, dear.
10:13Good night, Papo.
10:16Did you hear that?
10:22Did I hear what?
10:24Stampede. Stampede.
10:27It started, Bernardo.
10:33Well?
10:41Patty.
10:46You know that I love you very much, don't you?
10:51You hated me.
10:53No, I didn't hate you.
10:55You hated me.
10:57You hated me.
10:59You hated me.
11:00No, I didn't hate it.
11:02There's some good things in it.
11:04I just...
11:06You want my honest criticism?
11:09Of course.
11:12Well, honey, the first rule of good writing is to choose a subject you know something about.
11:18You mean it didn't seem authentic to you?
11:21Why?
11:23For one thing, you've never been a teenage nurse among the Pui Pui Indians in the wilds of the Matagrosso.
11:29Edgar Rice Burroughs wasn't brought by a gorilla in Africa.
11:32You create with your imagination.
11:34Besides, I researched it.
11:36Yeah, well, that's not the same.
11:39Didn't you like the war scenes?
11:41Yes, I did.
11:42They were real and vivid and authentic.
11:45Do you mean that?
11:46I certainly do.
11:48I felt the same way about them the first time I read them, 20 years ago.
11:51They made Hemingway famous.
11:53Oh, it may have a Hemingway flavor, but I...
11:56Yeah, I know, you were just researching.
11:59What about the character of Jenny?
12:01She didn't come from Hemingway.
12:03No, I felt she was more like Joan of Arc, only braver.
12:11You hated everything.
12:13No, I didn't.
12:15Now, there were some really fine things in there.
12:18Things that were all your own, you know?
12:21In fact, for instance, the comedy scene was just wonderful.
12:29The comedy scene?
12:31During the big battle.
12:33Remember when the enemies were locked in...
12:35What was your phrase?
12:37In the throes of mortal and deadly anguish,
12:40with their eyes caught in fierce combat.
12:44And then Jenny comes by with her first aid kit,
12:47and they take one look at her and stop fighting and start trying to date her.
12:53That wasn't a comedy scene.
12:55I see.
12:56There's no business with you.
12:58Now, Patty, please, I was...
13:00I'm sorry for taking up your valuable time.
13:04What happened?
13:06Oh, it was a disaster.
13:10Was the book that bad?
13:12It was a combination of Hemingway, Salinger, and Superman, only ungrammatical.
13:17It's easy for everybody to sit back and criticize.
13:20But I'll tell you this,
13:22there's going to be a lot of crow eating around here when my book gets published.
13:24Publishers.
13:26Repeat.
13:28Publishers.
13:30Publishers. Here we are.
13:32You're not going to send it to a publisher.
13:34What did you think I was going to do with it?
13:37Well, a lot of authors just put their first book away.
13:41They consider it a kind of training.
13:43They don't put bestsellers away.
13:46This has everything.
13:48Love,
13:50war,
13:52poverty,
13:54death,
13:56cooking recipes.
13:58I mean, you never read a book before where they actually gave you a cooking recipe
14:02right in the middle of a chapter, did you?
14:04No.
14:06Do you know what the bestsellers are?
14:08Cookbooks. And I've thrown it in for nothing.
14:10Six of Marvin's best recipes.
14:12Just wait.
14:14I'll show all of you.
14:24Patty, how was everything at school today?
14:26Fine, thank you.
14:29Are you feeling all right?
14:32Fine, thank you.
14:36Look, Patty,
14:38I know how sensitive the artistic temperament is,
14:41but you've had this iron curtain up for a week now.
14:44I told you I'm sorry if I've hurt your feelings.
14:47But if you're going to be an author, then you have to get used to criticism.
14:50Besides, I wasn't criticizing you.
14:52I was criticizing your book.
14:54Of course.
14:56I understand.
14:59I'll get it.
15:16I know.
15:19Who was it, Kathy?
15:21Telegram. For Patty Lane.
15:22For me?
15:33Is anything wrong?
15:35No, nothing's wrong.
15:38It's just a telegram from my publisher.
15:41My book's going to be published immediately.
15:44They expect it to be a bestseller.
15:48If you'll forgive me now,
15:49I think I'll retire to my garage.
15:54How did you get the idea for your book?
15:59Well,
16:01everyone is always attacking their teenager.
16:04When adults think of us, they think of
16:06rock and roll,
16:08telephones, hamburgers.
16:11I wanted to give them a more realistic image.
16:13Show them
16:15the real us.
16:17Yeah, a real us.
16:19A brave teenage girl
16:21runs away from her home in Detroit
16:23to become a nurse among the Poi Poi Indians
16:25in the wilds of the Madagros.
16:28Oh, hello, Mr. Lane.
16:30Hello, boys. Hello, Patty.
16:32Alfred's interviewing Patty
16:34for the Brooklyn Heights Clarion.
16:36The paper's running a front page story on her.
16:38Yeah, it's wonderful.
16:40You know,
16:42teenage girl becomes famous author overnight.
16:44I bet it must make you feel kind of funny,
16:46me scooping your daughter like this.
16:47Well, it does feel a little funny, yeah.
16:49I suppose you're planning
16:51a Sunday feature story on her, huh?
16:53Well, we, uh,
16:55we hadn't decided on the day yet.
16:57Our readers would like to know
16:59your opinions about your fellow authors.
17:01Whom do you admire most?
17:04Ernest Hemingway.
17:06What do you think of T.S. Eliot?
17:09T.S. is long-winded,
17:11but very talented.
17:13And Francois Dupas?
17:15An illiterate French genius.
17:17He's a child.
17:19Well, uh, Julie, excuse me.
17:21Will you be going to Hollywood
17:23to write the picture?
17:25Probably.
17:27Hello, dear.
17:29Hey, what's cooking? It smells good.
17:31That's me.
17:33Oh.
17:35Is the press conference still going on?
17:37Oh, yeah. I can't understand it.
17:39The book is being published.
17:41I know it is, but I don't know why.
17:43Couldn't you have been wrong about it?
17:45It's not very good.
17:47Well,
17:49the publisher saw values in it
17:51that you didn't see.
17:53You read it. What's your opinion?
17:55It's not very good.
17:57And yet somebody is willing
17:59to shell out an advance of $1,000 or $2,000,
18:01plus the money it's going to take to publish it.
18:03According to the telegram,
18:05the contracts are on the way.
18:07So I guess we must be wrong.
18:09What are we having for dinner tonight?
18:11Crow.
18:18Good evening.
18:20My name is Blair of the Byre Publishing Company.
18:22I wanted to meet Miss Patricia Lane.
18:24How do you do, Mr. Blair?
18:26I'm Patricia's father.
18:28Well, it's an honor, sir.
18:30An honor and a privilege.
18:32I always say more attention
18:34should be paid to the parents of talented writers.
18:36Behind every talented writer
18:38is a mother, a father,
18:40shaping them, molding them.
18:42Genius, I always say,
18:44is no accident.
18:45Uh, no.
18:47Well, I'm sorry, but Pat,
18:49Patricia is out right now.
18:51Well, my fault, sir.
18:53I should have telephoned first,
18:55but I just happened to be in the neighborhood
18:57and I did want to meet Patricia
18:59and to drop the contracts off.
19:01But you brought the contracts with you.
19:03Oh, yes. All she has to do is sign them.
19:05Come in, won't you?
19:09This is my niece, Kathy.
19:11This is Mr. Blair, Patricia's publisher.
19:13How do you do?
19:15I've missed you.
19:17Oh, that's all right.
19:19She'll be seeing a lot of me.
19:21That's a mighty talented young woman.
19:23We don't get many manuscripts like hers.
19:25I should think not.
19:27Well, I don't want to detain you, Mr. Lane.
19:29I would like to discuss the advance.
19:31Well, we can talk about that if you like.
19:33What did you have in mind?
19:35Well, our usual advance is $1,500.
19:37$1,500?
19:41Yes, if that is satisfactory to her.
19:43Well, I'm sure that it would be.
19:45That's more than satisfactory.
19:48Mr. Blair,
19:50do you really feel Patty's book
19:52is going to be a bestseller?
19:54There's no doubt about it.
19:56That book has got everything.
19:58The romance,
20:00war,
20:02death,
20:04cooking recipes.
20:06Well, I've got other authors to see tonight
20:08and I'm sure you have business
20:10to take care of, Mr. Lane,
20:11so if you'll just give me the check,
20:13I'll be on my way.
20:15Check?
20:17The $1,500.
20:19You want a $1,500 advance from me?
20:22No, from your daughter.
20:24Oh, from my daughter.
20:27This publishing firm of yours, Mr. Blair,
20:31it's one of those vanity presses, I take it.
20:34Well, I wouldn't call it that.
20:37I don't care what you call it.
20:39The point is that people pay you money
20:41for books so they can see their name in print.
20:43Well, there's nothing wrong with that, Mr. Lane.
20:45And you'll publish anything that's submitted to you.
20:47Well, actually, Mr. Lane,
20:49my business is not with you, it's with your daughter.
20:51And she did sign a contract.
20:54Patty signed a contract?
20:56Oh, yes.
20:58All of our authors,
21:00when they submit their manuscripts to us,
21:02sign a contract specifying that
21:04if we accept their book for publication,
21:06they will be personally responsible
21:08for all the costs of the publication thereof.
21:09So if you want to talk to anybody,
21:11you can talk to my lawyer.
21:13Good night, Mr. Lane, young lady.
21:15Mr. Blair,
21:17be sure to tell your lawyer
21:19that the girl who signed the contract is 16 years old.
21:22What did you say?
21:24I said that you'd made
21:26an airtight contract with a minor.
21:28You mean a 16-year-old girl wrote that book?
21:32Well, Hemingway, Sollinger,
21:35and Betty Crocker wrote some of it.
21:37I ought to sue you for wasting my time.
21:39Good night.
21:41You're forgetting something, Mr. Blair.
21:43What?
21:45You promised my daughter that you'd publish her book.
21:47Forget it.
21:49All right, I won't detain you, Mr. Blair.
21:51We're both busy men.
21:53You have authors to see,
21:55and I have to get down to my newspaper.
21:57Newspaper.
22:03You wouldn't be
22:05Martin Lane, would you?
22:07Yes.
22:09Are you not the managing editor
22:11of the New York Chronicle?
22:13Yes.
22:15Mr. Lane, the vanity press
22:17is a perfectly legitimate branch
22:19of the publishing business.
22:21We cater to people's dreams,
22:23people whose dream it is
22:25to see their novel in print.
22:27I'm aware of that.
22:29Yes, well, now I would not want
22:31to be unfair about this.
22:34Your daughter's book
22:36does have a certain
22:37naive charm to it.
22:40I don't see any reason
22:42why we shouldn't publish it.
22:44At our expense, of course.
22:46I suggest a 10-copy press run.
22:48That way Patricia will be satisfied
22:50and she'll never have to know
22:52how big the edition was.
22:54Patty has a lot of friends.
22:56Well, all right, 25 copies.
23:0150 copies.
23:03100 copies.
23:08That's a nice round figure.
23:12Boy, Kathy, were you smart not to go.
23:15That movie wasn't released.
23:17It escaped.
23:19Patty, I want you to meet your publisher.
23:21This is Mr. Blair.
23:25Mr. Blair?
23:28I can't tell you how excited I am.
23:30I'm so excited.
23:32I've never been published before.
23:34How did you like the book?
23:37I sincerely feel that that book
23:39is one of the most unusual works
23:41we have ever handled.
23:46Francoise Dupont,
23:48je suis arrivée.
23:58Boy, being a celebrity
24:00is sure rough on the fingers.
24:02I must have autographed 100 books.
24:04You promised you'd autograph one for me.
24:06Okay, okay.
24:08Could you put on it
24:10to Ross,
24:12from his sister who wrote the book?
24:14Sure.
24:16Thanks.
24:18I promised the kids that I'd bring it to class tomorrow.
24:20Your book has certainly created a stir
24:22on Brooklyn Heights High.
24:24I'll bet it has.
24:26Created quite a stir around here.
24:28Good afternoon, everybody.
24:30Well, I brought the revised contracts.
24:32Don't mind if I read those first, do you?
24:34I hope so.
24:38Boy, have I got a surprise for you, Mr. Blair.
24:41My new book.
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