The Critic - S1E03 - Dial 'M' For Mother
Transcript
00:00
00:23Hola.
00:24Hola, Jay. Soy tu jefe.
00:26Obtuve un permiso legal
00:28para cazar hombres como deporte.
00:29Y me preguntaba si quieres venir
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undefined:undefinedtrabajando en una cura.
01:35lo llamamos "El Aceite Lou Gehrig "
01:42Fuerte retorno.
01:45La enfermedad de Lou Gehrig
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undefined:undefineddijo que este era mejor.
02:17Bueno, déjame decirte,
02:18La vida no son todos finales felices,
02:20Y tú eres suficientemente maduro
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02:57Hijo, Solo gasté 3 días con un
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undefined:undefinedesperanza en América,
03:12Y esa palabra es Dukakis.
03:15Una, uh...
03:17Victoria en noviembre.
03:19A la victoria en noviembre.
03:22Esta audiencia monitorea
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03:55¡tenemos snaps de jengibre!
03:57¡Muy bien!
03:58Sabes, ese tipo con el bigote
04:00Es medio retorcido.
04:01¿Está en una banda?
04:03¡Es Adolf Hitler!
04:04¿No lo reconocen?
04:06Oh, cierto.
04:07Interpretaba al cartero en "cheers".
04:20¡Oh!
04:21¿Por qué estas tan desanimado,
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undefined:undefinedesto a ninguna persona.
04:51La gente se pregunta porque soy
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undefined:undefinedfeo que vi en mi vida.
05:15¡Ow!
05:23Tienes que ser más adorable.
05:25Solo imagínate con una mujer
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undefined:undefineduna mierda.
05:48Uh, déjame revisar
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06:36Esa cosa era una abominación.
06:41¿No tienes vergüenza?
06:42¡Fuera de aquí!
06:44Pero es la parte para lo que nací.
06:47Te diré que Jay, no más trucos.
06:49Pero haré que la gente te vea
06:51en el aire con tu hijo.
06:53¿Oh? Bueno, estoy seguro
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07:12lo escucharás de mis abogados.
07:14Quiero decir "adogados".
07:16Jay, necesitamos algo
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undefined:undefinedestúpidas ideas!
07:36es decir, debería tenerlas,
07:39¡si tuviera el cerebro en un
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08:12¡Te tengo!
08:25¿Sabes?, realmente disfruté tu show hoy.
08:29¡Cállate!
08:30Jay, pienso que deberías saber que
08:32El oso se siente terrible
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undefined:undefineda un crítico,
09:00pasaste 2 semanas sentada en una
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undefined:undefinedcomún. ¿Por qué?
09:29Geraldo Rivera está haciendo
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undefined:undefinedpero necesito un favor.
09:55¿Saldrías, por favor, en TV. Conmigo?
09:57Hijo, no tengo intenciones
10:00de aparecer en la caja idiota
10:02como alguna Al Jolson en sus
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10:21¿Y sólo decir que me amas?
10:23Seguro. ¿Y sabes algo?
10:26no está tan alejado de la verdad.
10:28Hijo ama a madre, dulce romance,
10:32Pobre padre viejo no tiene
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ap.
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11:18¿En serio?
11:19Luego agarro el caldo,
11:21le agrego zanahorias y condimento,
11:22y se lo sirvo a los chicos
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12:06y sus madres.
12:07Fue difícil darlo a luz.
12:09Estuve en parto por 2 semanas
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undefined:undefinedcon el crítico de cine, Jay Sherman
12:27Y su madre, Eleanor.
12:29Jay, me gustaría comenzar preguntándote
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undefined:undefineddesde que tu show comenzó.
13:01Geraldo, sufro de un raro desorden
13:04que causa parches de gordura
13:06en todo mi cuerpo.
13:08Me veo obligado a comer
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undefined:undefinedpensamos que era un mono.
13:34Su nombre original era Sr. Bip.
13:38Y este es Jay corriendo
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14:02y decía, "tómame la temperatura,
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undefined:undefinedesta familia.
14:31¿Ahora quien quiere bailar boogie
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14:59Pensé que era encantador...
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15:21¿Piensas que soy una hormiga?
15:23No. creo que eres un inodoro gordo
15:25y estoy tirando mi dinero en él,
15:26imitación de "Johnny Cash."
15:28Hey, hombre, eso es ingenioso.
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undefined:undefineddisculpas que le envié?
16:23Oh, mi madre
16:27eres tan maravillosa
16:31Ataquen cuando lo vean.
16:37Para mí eres tan buena
16:41mira, tengo 16, y los últimos 10 años,
16:44estuve tratando de mantener a
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undefined:undefinedgolpeó a su madre con la biblia!"
17:14Oh, como alguien
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undefined:undefinedque no podemos curar:
18:17Un corazón roto.
18:21Joven, tienes un mal caso
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undefined:undefinedtu fuerza.
18:48Uh-Uh.
18:50Mmm, durazno.
18:53Mmm. Más. Más.
18:55¿Por qué no tomas mi bolsa de
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undefined:undefinedes un estropeado ego.
19:29Bueno, eso es un alivio.
19:31Oh, y hay un gran fragmento
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undefined:undefinedel corazón de un joven.
20:12Gracias.
20:14Y ese es nuestro show
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22:37Disculpe señor, el show terminó.
22:40Pero no tengo a dónde ir.
22:45