Matt Rogers can really do it all - he sings, writes, cracks funny jokes, and now he can combine all three to create the ultimate comebacks. Matt is exposed to 'pick me' fan comments, press surrounding the release of 'Fire Island,' and the inevitable internet trolls, but feels inspired to burn them all - in song. Watch as Matt Rogers freestyles responses, improvs Christmas jingles, and belts a heartfelt number called... Ah DADDY!!!
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PeopleTranscript
00:00 I reject the premise that I'm ho-ho-ho-ing my way to the top.
00:03 Hi, I'm Matt Rogers, and I'm playing Burden Ballads with Elle.
00:09 You're gonna read some mean tweets about yourself,
00:11 and then when you hear something that you're inspired by,
00:14 you'll turn it into a song.
00:15 Here we go. Let's dive into "Cruelty."
00:17 Matt Rogers is the most annoying guest
00:20 that has ever sat on "Watch What Happens Live."
00:23 Oh, my God. Okay.
00:25 [ "Cruelty" plays ]
00:27 ♪ Ooh, yeah ♪
00:31 ♪ I'm drunk when I go on that show ♪
00:35 ♪ I'm really drunk ♪
00:38 ♪ I'm really drunk when I go on that show ♪
00:41 They absolutely ply you with alcohol. Period.
00:45 That's -- That's why I might be annoying on the show.
00:47 They get you wasted on that show.
00:49 -Is Andy drinking with you or no?
00:50 -I think he fakes it.
00:52 I think he's like, "Yeah, shotski!"
00:53 And then he puts it down and, like, drinks water.
00:55 [ Laughs ]
00:57 Here's another one.
00:59 "Please don't have Matt Rogers sing his Christmas song,
01:02 because I don't think so, honey.
01:04 Not everyone needs a Christmas album, and this proves it."
01:09 Everyone does need a Christmas album, actually,
01:11 if you want to make money.
01:12 "What a joke of a grown man Matt Rogers is."
01:15 This -- I can do this. Ready?
01:18 ♪ F--- you ♪
01:22 [ Laughs ]
01:23 IDK why, I just find Matt Rogers insufferable.
01:27 [ Laughs ]
01:30 ♪♪
01:34 ♪ Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm ♪
01:38 ♪ Sometimes, so do I ♪
01:42 ♪ I find me insufferable, too ♪
01:47 ♪ Sometimes I can't stand the sound of my own voice ♪
01:52 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
01:54 Ugh, I hated that.
01:56 ♪ I think sometimes I can be a lie ♪
02:01 ♪ But sometimes I think ♪
02:04 ♪ That a lot is what everyone really needs ♪
02:10 Ugh, just kidding. I'm so annoying.
02:12 I really am.
02:13 That whole thing was annoying.
02:15 He agrees. We used to date.
02:17 We dated for 2 1/2 years,
02:19 and he left 'cause I was annoying.
02:21 [ Laughs ]
02:24 Next one is all the "Pick Me" comments.
02:27 I just want to say,
02:28 there's a negative connotation around "Pick Me."
02:31 Keep these coming.
02:32 For example...
02:33 "Matt, you make me horny. There, I said it."
02:37 Oh, my God.
02:39 "Matt Rogers is so hot, moans."
02:42 ♪♪
02:46 ♪ Oh ♪
02:49 ♪ When I see Matt Rogers on the screen ♪
02:52 ♪ Oh ♪
02:55 ♪ Moans ♪
02:57 ♪ Oh ♪
03:01 ♪ Oh ♪
03:04 ♪ These are the sounds I make when I see Matt Rogers ♪
03:09 Ugh. Yeah.
03:12 Mmm.
03:16 "Literally sexy angel poster boy."
03:19 Let's go.
03:20 ♪♪
03:23 ♪ It's me ♪
03:25 ♪ The literal sexy angel poster boy ♪
03:30 ♪ It's me ♪
03:33 ♪ The literal sexy angel poster boy ♪
03:38 ♪ Ha ha hee hee ho hee hee ha ha ha ha ♪
03:42 ♪ That's the kind of laugh I do ♪
03:46 Merry Christmas to you.
03:49 Ha ha!
03:51 "Ah, Daddy."
03:54 That's it. [ Laughs ]
03:56 "Ah, Daddy."
03:58 ♪♪
04:01 ♪ Ah, Daddy ♪
04:07 ♪ Why did you leave me in my mouth? ♪
04:12 ♪ Ah, Daddy ♪
04:18 ♪ When will you come home? ♪
04:25 ♪ We miss you most at Christmastime ♪
04:29 ♪ Daddy ♪
04:33 ♪ It's hard to know ♪
04:36 ♪ You've got another family now ♪
04:39 ♪ Ah, Daddy ♪
04:45 ♪ Come home ♪
04:51 This was probably not the intent of their original tweet.
04:54 It's probably like, "Ah, Daddy,"
04:55 but I made it into, like, that vibe.
04:59 ♪ Hmm ♪
05:01 [ Laughs ]
05:03 Okay, next one.
05:04 "Oh, my, and I can't stress this enough.
05:07 [Bleep] God."
05:09 We're gonna turn this into a Christmas classic.
05:11 Oh, I have some hats, too.
05:12 -Yeah.
05:14 ♪♪
05:16 -So, this is a new Christmas hit inspired by,
05:19 "Oh, my, and I can't stress this enough.
05:22 [Bleep] God."
05:24 ♪♪
05:27 ♪ A lot of people saying things like Santa and Mrs. Claus ♪
05:31 ♪ Oh, my [bleep] God ♪
05:34 ♪ A lot of people saying things like gifts and other gifts ♪
05:38 ♪ Oh, my [bleep] God ♪
05:41 ♪ The reason we even have a holiday ♪
05:44 ♪ Is because of the big man riding that sleigh ♪
05:48 ♪ Oh, my [bleep] God ♪
05:51 ♪ Oh, my [bleep] God ♪
05:55 ♪ Oh, my [bleep] God ♪
05:57 ♪ I can't stress this enough ♪
05:59 ♪ It's all about you ♪
06:04 Yeah!
06:06 -The last section, headlines about yourself,
06:09 and same deal, turn those into music.
06:11 -Okay. -Oh.
06:12 The press, always hounding me.
06:15 Don't know who I am.
06:16 From NBC, "Matt Rogers lied about his favorite singer
06:20 to hide that he was gay in middle school."
06:22 Yeah.
06:24 ♪♪
06:27 ♪ When I was a boy ♪
06:30 ♪ I thought that I could toy ♪
06:33 ♪ With people's perceptions ♪
06:37 ♪ I said I loved Limp Bizkit ♪
06:41 ♪ That was a goddamn lie ♪
06:46 ♪ Who I really loved ♪
06:49 ♪ Was Kelly Clarkson and such ♪
06:54 ♪ Women who sang so beautifully ♪
06:58 ♪ That speak to a gay kid's sensibility ♪
07:03 ♪ If you asked me in truth ♪
07:07 ♪ I could not really sing one Limp Bizkit song ♪
07:12 You know what? Actually, I do know this --
07:15 ♪ Rollin', rollin', rollin', rollin' ♪
07:17 So I know "Rollin'," and I think I know a few words.
07:20 ♪ He did it all, hold a nookie ♪
07:21 But, yeah, no, I didn't actually like Limp Bizkit.
07:23 I was just a very gay child, and that was what was cool.
07:27 -What do you think is the craziest lie you said
07:29 to hide your sexuality in the narrative?
07:31 -I was the president of the fan club of Christiana Loken.
07:35 She's, like, this model-turned-actor, I guess.
07:38 So I lied and said I was the president of her fan club
07:41 and that I ran her website,
07:42 and I told my Spanish teacher that.
07:44 She went like, "Ugh."
07:46 And I think she was so right to do that.
07:48 Anyone would have been right to just be like,
07:49 "Ugh, God, these little straight idiots."
07:53 [ Laughs ]
07:54 This is from "The Guardian."
07:56 "Fire Island" review.
07:57 "Breezy gay spin on Pride and Prejudice fails to ignite."
08:05 The negative review says, "Fire Island is colorful,
08:08 digestible, and gamely acted by an ensemble
08:10 of roundly good-looking comic performers."
08:12 That's a slay.
08:13 That's a totally amazing review.
08:16 ♪ Are you homophobic? ♪
08:19 ♪ Is that what this is? ♪
08:21 ♪ Sounds like you liked it ♪
08:23 ♪ Although digestible ♪
08:26 ♪ Digestible doesn't sound like ♪
08:28 ♪ Optimally what you want to be called ♪
08:30 Next one, from "Pride Source."
08:33 "How Matt Rogers is ho-ho-ho-ing his way to the top."
08:38 I reject the premise that I'm ho-ho-ho-ing my way to the top.
08:41 [ Chimes ]
08:43 [ Piano plays ]
08:45 ♪ Here's how I'm ho-ho-ho-ing my way to the top ♪
08:50 Step one.
08:52 ♪ Meet someone with a lot of money in the biz ♪
08:57 [Bleep]
08:58 ♪ Step two ♪
09:01 ♪ Keep that man close to you ♪
09:06 ♪ Step three ♪
09:07 ♪ Find another person who has a big job and a lot of money ♪
09:13 [Bleep]
09:14 I'm not really doing this stuff.
09:15 Can I say something?
09:17 You know how I got to the top?
09:18 From really hard work and, I think, talent.
09:20 So this ho-ho-ho-ing his way to the top,
09:23 I guess this is sort of saying, like, I'm using Christmas,
09:25 but I don't like the sexual connotation here.
09:28 I don't like that they're making me sound like a [bleep]
09:31 I am.
09:32 How do you think I get booked on "Watch What Happens Live"
09:33 so much?
09:36 [ Chuckles ]
09:37 All right, that was the show,
09:39 and be sure to stream my actual album
09:41 of music that I thought about prior to coming out
09:44 and singing called "Have You Heard of Christmas?"
09:46 You can stream it everywhere.
09:48 Everywhere.
09:49 Actually, annoying how ubiquitous it is.
09:52 It's everywhere.
09:53 ♪♪
10:03 ♪♪
10:12 [BLANK_AUDIO]