#KyliePadilla was Cosmopolitan Philippines' September 2023 cover star, and we challenged the actress to give advice regarding life, relationships, and career in this episode of #CosmoChallenge. From trying out dating apps to forgiving a cheater, from quarter-life crisis to struggling as a breadwinner, listen to her answer these relatable questions.
VIDEO PRODUCED BY:
Pisha Melliza, Cass Lazaro
VIDEO SHOT BY:
Jez Villapando
VIDEO EDITED BY:
Jez Villapando
VIDEO PRODUCED BY:
Pisha Melliza, Cass Lazaro
VIDEO SHOT BY:
Jez Villapando
VIDEO EDITED BY:
Jez Villapando
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00 You know, we have the same question.
00:02 Hello everyone, I'm Kylie Padilla and I'll be taking the Cosmo Challenge by giving
00:09 advice to your most common problems.
00:12 Sana we can do this.
00:14 Let's start.
00:15 My boyfriend of five years broke up with me recently and I've been feeling lost since I
00:24 thought we were endgame.
00:26 How do I move on and rebuild my life?
00:29 You know what I learned from what I went through?
00:31 You can't rush things.
00:33 Sometimes, I feel like in our generation, everything is on social media.
00:38 So we have this feeling that we have to present like, "I'm okay!"
00:43 or "You don't look like a loser."
00:45 But I think that giving is very important.
00:48 You really need to feel it.
00:50 You need to cry.
00:51 Because that's when you'll see where you're going.
00:55 And you'll find yourself. Do things that you want to do or something that you've wanted
01:02 to do for a long time.
01:02 Then you'll discover yourself little by little.
01:05 And give yourself time.
01:07 It takes time to truly heal.
01:10 Because there's a healing that's out there.
01:13 You'll get cut, you'll get better, you'll get thinner.
01:16 But still, inside, you haven't really processed it.
01:20 So that's what you need to do.
01:21 You need to process the pain.
01:23 You know, the last thing I thought about was,
01:26 "I've been alive for 10 or 15 years, and I've lost it in my life."
01:30 "I need to get it back."
01:32 "Because I can still do it."
01:33 "Because I've been alive and I've lost it."
01:34 "So I can do it again."
01:36 "I've been trying dating apps on and off, hoping to meet someone."
01:39 "But I just can't seem to find the right one."
01:41 "I'm getting tired. What do I do?"
01:43 There's a quote that says, "Once you stop looking, it will come."
01:48 So maybe, the universe is telling you to stop and focus on yourself.
01:53 Then, the right person will come.
01:54 I'm in my late 20s, and my friends seem to have life all figured out.
01:59 Yet still, I don't know what to do in the long run.
02:01 I know we all have our own pace,
02:03 but I can't help but feel like I've been left behind.
02:07 How do I deal with this?
02:08 You know, I have the same.
02:10 No, I think all of us at this age have to go through that.
02:15 Because I feel like, in some aspects of my life,
02:17 I've been left behind.
02:20 Because I had a baby when I was 24.
02:23 25.
02:23 And then I stopped working.
02:26 I lost like six years.
02:28 Not really lost, but you know.
02:29 I focused on my family for six years.
02:33 So career-wise, I feel like I've lost a lot of time.
02:38 But honestly, when I accept that feeling,
02:43 creatively, I get a lot of juices.
02:47 Because I feel like I'm already chasing it.
02:49 So I think you should stay there,
02:51 and then try and brainstorm what's really for you.
02:54 Because usually at this age,
02:56 as women, we're pressured to find a partner, get married.
03:00 But as someone who was there,
03:02 who was there,
03:04 it's okay to wait until the time you're really ready.
03:07 Put yourself first in your career.
03:09 Nothing's wrong with that.
03:10 Don't feel pressured.
03:12 Because the right timing for you will come.
03:14 I really do believe in that.
03:16 I've been feeling burnt out from working hard lately,
03:19 but I'm the family breadwinner.
03:21 So I can't quit or go on leave easily.
03:24 How do I save myself?
03:26 Maybe you should go on a weekend
03:28 where you'll just travel somewhere out of town.
03:32 Then just enjoy, quiet, meditate.
03:36 That's really not stimulated by any phone.
03:39 Then you'll be relaxed.
03:41 Maybe you just need time to really breathe.
03:44 Just breathe.
03:45 Because when it comes to breadwinners,
03:47 we all have a choice.
03:50 Yes, but we should also think that
03:52 there are a lot of people who are very grateful for us,
03:55 for working.
03:56 So let's just remember that there are a lot of people
04:00 who are happy,
04:01 or there are a lot of people who make us happy
04:04 with our hard work.
04:05 So take time to breathe and remember.
04:08 My boyfriend cheated on me once and I forgave him.
04:11 He always assures me,
04:12 but sometimes I can't help thinking he'll do it again.
04:15 I'm so paranoid about it.
04:16 How do I deal with my feelings?
04:19 Before, I would say that once a cheater, always a cheater.
04:22 But I've grown to believe that giving another chance
04:26 is not so bad.
04:27 But you need to talk about why he did it
04:32 and if there are issues underlying with both of you.
04:35 That's why he feels like he did it.
04:38 So if you can try and talk about it.
04:41 And of course, he really needs to assure you
04:43 because he doesn't trust you.
04:44 You need to communicate with each other.
04:46 And I feel like if it's really you, you can fix it.
04:50 I'm 25 and I have two kids already.
04:54 My husband wants to try for a third,
04:56 but I want to take a break and focus on my career first.
04:59 How do I communicate this without hurting his feelings?
05:03 First of all, you have a right to say that you don't want to
05:06 because you want to take a break.
05:08 You're the one who's having a hard time.
05:09 You're the one who made the baby, you're the one who gave birth.
05:11 So don't feel bad for that.
05:13 Just tell him, "It's not because I don't want to have a baby."
05:20 Just tell him that it's for you because he's really tired.
05:24 And I will tell your husband now,
05:26 "Please, let your husband take a break.
05:28 It's really hard to have a baby."
05:31 And yeah, he needs to rest.
05:34 He needs to respect that, I think.
05:36 I'm 27. I've never been in a relationship.
05:39 How do I put myself out there?
05:40 What are the best qualities I should look for in a partner?
05:44 You know, we have the same question.
05:46 A lot of people say that when they started in a relationship,
05:52 they started with friends first.
05:55 They have a solid relationship.
05:58 Because I feel like, if you like someone,
06:02 you just have to be nice to them or you find them attractive,
06:04 it's okay.
06:05 But there has to be things that you look for.
06:07 Am I compatible with this?
06:09 Do I laugh with him?
06:10 Do I find him funny?
06:12 Or am I stimulated?
06:13 Like, is my mind stimulated?
06:15 Not just physically.
06:17 Like, you know, it has to be the whole thing.
06:20 So, it's like everything.
06:22 You just have to...
06:23 Maybe, you look for the one who's like your best friend.
06:26 But then, of course, you're not his best friend.
06:28 You get it?
06:28 The one who's just happy.
06:30 Not the...
06:32 Because there are relationships where you're just flirting, yes,
06:35 but you don't really connect mentally.
06:38 You connect physically but not really emotionally.
06:40 There are things like that.
06:41 That's what you're looking for.
06:42 Mentally, emotionally, physically attracted to the person.
06:45 My dad, who has not been present my whole life,
06:48 suddenly reached out and wants to bond.
06:50 I'm 21.
06:51 How do I connect with him?
06:52 I don't want to make him cry.
06:54 Daddy issues.
06:56 I think you should give him a chance.
07:00 Because a lot of us have lost our parents
07:04 and they really want that chance to connect with their,
07:07 you know, parents.
07:08 And you have this chance.
07:09 So if you have a chance to forgive,
07:12 of course, if you have a bad feeling, that's normal.
07:15 But if you can be the better person
07:17 and give him the chance to connect with you again,
07:20 you will both appreciate it.
07:22 Because our life is, you know,
07:23 it's temporary.
07:25 All of us will all pass.
07:27 And if you can create the memories now, why not?
07:30 And that's it for today.
07:32 Which celebs would you like to do the Cosmo Challenge?
07:35 Let us know in the comments.
07:37 Don't forget to follow my socials
07:38 and subscribe to Cosmo's YouTube channel.
07:41 Thanks for watching!