ADAM and Eve have been together for 10 years and started in a polyamorous relationship. Since 2020 they have dated about 60 people. They are dating coaches and have applied their knowledge to their own dating lives. Adam and Eve have five children and describe their parenting style as ‘pretty standard’. Eve said: “When it comes to our children we didn’t really sit down and have a specific conversation like ‘Mommy and Daddy are polyamorous’ - so for them it’s just another friend until about six months in.” Despite having dated around 60 people, the couple have only properly introduced three of their partners to their children. The couple have faced judgement about their dating lives and misconceptions about their behaviour in front of their children. Adam said: “I don’t believe our dating life impacts our children in any major way, other than to help them be more tolerant and open to other ideals.” They are currently in a relationship with Bella with whom they got romantically involved a few months ago. Their children adore her and especially enjoy baking with her. Eve said: “The best thing about being in a poly relationship is you’re making your own rules. It’s like you have your cake and eat it.”
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00:00We're a married couple and we have a girlfriend.
00:03Since 2020, we've dated about 60 people.
00:07When it comes to our children, we didn't really sit down and have a specific conversation about
00:12mom and daddy falling in love with us.
00:14Probably took about two and a half months before they were like,
00:17okay, wait a minute, this is somebody special.
00:19Have you met many of your parents' partners?
00:22So I have this guy, he thinks that his outline of ideal woman is impossible to find.
00:30I became a dating coach 18 years ago as an accident.
00:33There are only five skills you need for a woman to find you more attractive.
00:37I actually got voted the number one dating coach in the world three years in a row.
00:40His detail list is so detailed.
00:42What are you telling him?
00:43Well, I'm telling him to revise his list a little bit, basically.
00:46We've been running the company together.
00:48We've helped over 350,000 people in the world get their ideal relationship.
00:54Once he applies this, he will never have a problem with dating ever again.
01:00How have you personally applied your knowledge as dating coaches to your own dating lives?
01:05I know this stuff inside and out, and it is impossible to be a relationship and not apply it.
01:09In our relationship, we have our dynamic, my dynamic with our partner,
01:15Eve's dynamic with our partner, and then our dynamic all together.
01:18So it's a lot more communication.
01:20So you just have to welcome a lot of very uncomfortable discussions
01:23that lead to wonderful results.
01:30We've been together for 10 years, almost 11 years.
01:33When we first met at Austin Fashion Week, I was in a relationship with another woman,
01:37and she actually saw Eve first and said, oh my gosh, I have to date that woman.
01:43And so I went up and said, hi.
01:45I didn't really specifically was seeking for polyamorous relationship per se.
01:49I was going with the flow.
01:50But over time, it developed into a real relationship,
01:53and the three of us ended up living together for six years.
01:56We had children together.
01:57She's still one of our incredibly good friends,
01:59but the relationship part of it has fallen aside and turned into more of a friendship.
02:02And that happened a few years ago now.
02:04And since then, we and Eve have continued that lifestyle and dating other people.
02:10We have five kids, Oliver, Dante, Orion, Ivy, and Tori.
02:16Our parenting styles, I would say, pretty standard, actually.
02:21I'm more of a strict parent than he is.
02:23I would say I'm the bad cop.
02:24He's a good cop.
02:25We homeschool our kids because we believe that standard education
02:28is a bit too rigid and not very flexible.
02:32We spend every day with our children.
02:34But they have chores they have to complete in the morning.
02:36They're all very advanced.
02:38Our eldest son, at 14, we have spoken to him about people and relationships.
02:42He knows there is monogamy.
02:44He knows there is polyamory.
02:45Could you explain what polyamory is?
02:48Uh, polyamory is dating multiple people at the same time.
02:54When did your parents explain to you about their dating life
02:58and their polyamorous relationship?
03:00They didn't really need to explain to me that they were
03:05polyamorous.
03:06I kind of figured it out after a while.
03:08And they did tell me at a certain point.
03:10But I just realized that my dad dated multiple people.
03:14And that was just normal to me.
03:17When it comes to our children, we didn't really sit down and have a
03:20specific conversation about mommy and daddy polyamorous.
03:24So for them, we're just another friend, basically, right?
03:26Until about like six months.
03:29Just want to see how the children interact with the person we're dating.
03:33with the person we're dating as well before we get serious with anybody.
03:37Like, and that's important.
03:38Have you met many of your parents' partners?
03:42Uh, we do get to meet them after a while, but not until they feel comfortable
03:47with, uh, like making sure that it'll be okay for them to meet us.
03:51In the last four years, despite the fact that we've dated 60 people,
03:54there's really only been three that have actually interacted with the kids
03:58more than at like a group setting.
04:00When I talk to my friends about Bella,
04:03I usually do bring up the fact that she is my parents' partner.
04:07Hi, hon.
04:11Romantically, we've been together since January.
04:13So a couple of months, but I've known them for years.
04:16There was this really awkward moment where I thought Bella really wanted me
04:21and maybe didn't really want Eve.
04:23Bella broke it to me that actually she preferred Eve and wasn't really into me.
04:28And she's like, you're okay.
04:30She's like, Eve's like a perfect 10 and you're like a six.
04:35Accurate numbers.
04:36I hadn't really been in a relationship with three people or two other people before.
04:42It's still like a learning progress type of thing.
04:46Since 2020, we've dated about 60 people, give or take.
04:51We have definitely dated more than one person at a time,
04:54but the dynamic tends to work best when we have the fun.
04:57Everything else is fun, wild time.
04:59I don't define any specific rigid rules.
05:02It's just a relationship that you make work by your own rules.
05:08Family is super accepting.
05:09Friends, mostly accepting.
05:11The friends that aren't accepting have gone.
05:14Yeah, they're not friends, right?
05:15Again, why would I live my life according to someone else's standards, right?
05:19It's my life.
05:19As far as strangers, we get all kinds of reactions.
05:22Some people are very supportive and ask a lot of questions.
05:25They're the same, which, you know, I answer the time.
05:28And some, of course, are very judgmental, right?
05:30And tell me that I have no self-esteem or no value.
05:32We absolutely have people try telling us that our lifestyle is going to have
05:37some kind of negative impact on our children.
05:39I don't believe our dating life impacts our children in any major way,
05:44other than to help them be more tolerant and open to other ideals.
05:48Are we the best parents in the world?
05:50Probably not.
05:51Yes, we are.
05:52Probably.
05:52Our children don't get confused about our dating life
05:54because we don't make our children part of our dating life.
05:58I think a lot of people misunderstand that our dating life seems to rule just
06:01living in a big compound and we have a lot of **** in front of our kids.
06:05So the biggest misconception is that we are too promiscuous
06:09and we're damaging our children, basically, which is not the case.
06:13Yeah, I think that's true.
06:14That's a massive misconception for us.
06:18How did you feel when Adam and Eve told you that they had five children?
06:22I was definitely a little overwhelmed at first,
06:25but getting to know them, they're so wonderful.
06:28They're so cute and they're so funny.
06:31My age kind of does help me connect with them on levels that they might not.
06:37I definitely still have a lot more, I don't want to say energy.
06:40You guys still have like a lot of energy.
06:43Just throw me in the bush.
06:44She's in her 20s.
06:46I'm like 80.
06:47I mean, you're almost there.
06:48Which is a completely grown adult.
06:50I double checked.
06:53Good job.
06:55I'm making a Bella.
06:58What are y'all baking today?
06:59We're baking two cakes, a lemon one and a chocolate one.
07:02That's how they met, was as a friend.
07:04And of course, when she was hanging out, she started baking with them and they
07:08pretty much fell in love with her.
07:09As our relationship developed, they really just knew Bella as a friend that came over
07:13and it probably took about two months to an hour and a half before they were like,
07:17OK, wait a minute, like this is somebody special.
07:20Push in and pull.
07:21There we go.
07:22Good job.
07:23She teach me so much that I'm able to do eggs now.
07:27What does it mean to you to see your children and girlfriend bonding like this?
07:31Very, very special, of course.
07:32It's for me the most important part.
07:33Our kids like her and she just fits really well.
07:35The best thing about being in a poly relationship is that, again, you make it in your own rules.
07:40It's like you have your cake and eat it.
07:43If my children grow up to be happy, wonderful people, that's all I really care about.
07:47I just need them to be happy and to be as successful as they want to be in their own
07:51world.