What Would Be The Worst Podcast Debate Topic? (The Bracket, Vol. 126)

Barstool Sports

KenJac | The Bracket

Transcript

00:00:00Welcome to The Bracket, episode 126. Today, we are debating what the worst

00:00:04fan-submitted bracket ideas are. We have a big-ass Google Sheet, right? And we get tons

00:00:10of submissions. A lot of them, I would say a majority of them are very, very good. We use

00:00:13them all. We give you shoutouts if you use them. A lot of them will be what you've done already.

00:00:16And then a very decent chunk are also ones that are horrible, bad ideas, or just funny ideas that

00:00:22we could never do. So this bracket is an ode to them, to all those beautiful people that submitted

00:00:28just ideas that we couldn't do. But before we get to that, also, we got Owen on. Owen's not been

00:00:33on The Bracket for a long time. Welcome to Owen and Rude Boy. A long time. Hello. Rude Boy. Why

00:00:38are you sitting like that, Rudy? Because this chair is difficult to sit in. Okay. Rude Boy's

00:00:43doing a, currently a, what, a run-through of every game of the year since 1980? Yeah, I am. Thank

00:00:48you for acknowledging. Yeah, first video's out. Really funny. Thank you, Nick. I watched the

00:00:53first, like, half, probably, like, half an hour of your Donkey Kong or what? Oh, yeah. What'd you

00:00:58think of my gameplay? That, I don't, the sound effects being so repetitive eventually fucks with

00:01:03my head. I think because we're not used to that type of gaming anymore, but it really just screws

00:01:06with me. You know what I mean? I used to, like, seize out after playing Pokemon for too long.

00:01:10Yeah. It's a, it's torturous what I'm going through. Yeah. It's like a, I'm very much looking

00:01:16forward to getting through the 80s and getting into the 90s where we can have some real. What

00:01:20are you looking for? What is, what else is left on the 80s? Uh, well, we started with Pac-Man and

00:01:26then it was Donkey Kong. And now 1981, the one that was the game that was the biggest one was

00:01:32Mrs. Pac-Man. That is not happening. I am not doing it. He moves, the ghosts move slower in

00:01:36Mrs. Pac-Man. What's the difference? I don't know, but I'm not going to find out because I'm not

00:01:40doing it. So I'm not, I'm not doing it. I think Mrs. Pac-Man might be easier. You have to do

00:01:44Mrs. Pac-Man? No, I don't. Or maybe it's harder. Okay. It's certainly not. I'll probably do Frogger.

00:01:48I just can't do another. Frogger, new Frogger. Yeah. I can't do another Pac-Man game. It really,

00:01:53it really mentally broke me. The 80s games are tough. It's like a design to make you infuriated.

00:01:58I feel like a mouse in a maze. No checkpoints either. It's like, you're basically restarting

00:02:02the entire level when you die. I was right there at the beginning of the stream and it was daytime

00:02:07and you could just see his entire apartment, like every single square inch of his apartment.

00:02:10It was unbelievable. I hated that. Every bit of it. It was, it was unreal. It was just like

00:02:16a looker in your blueprint. I don't like gaming in sunlight. Yeah. Before we get into this,

00:02:20let's talk about game time. Look, the game time. Let's see. What do you think? What should I look

00:02:25for a ticket for? Rangers game? Yeah. Rangers, Knicks, Yankees. It is incredible. New York.

00:02:30Gavin DeGraw. Gavin DeGraw, the big four. Yeah, Gavin DeGraw. Yeah. Hearing Chariot live is a

00:02:36religious experience. Gavin DeGraw is next playing in Little Rock, Texas, or Little Rock, Texas.

00:02:44That's not right. Little Rock, Arkansas. Yeah. Little Rock, Texas. $71. All in pricing at Gavin

00:02:52DeGraw and Little Rock in the hall. Gavin DeGraw's, I don't want to be anything.

00:02:58Whoever wins this bracket, can we send him tickets to Gavin DeGraw in Little Rock, Texas?

00:03:03In Little Rock, Texas. Not a real play. Or Saratoga? Or Waukegan? Waukegan, Illinois.

00:03:11Yeah. Illinois. Waukegan, Illinois. $96. Very close. The Genesee Theater. Very good,

00:03:16Bobby. Great deals over at Game Time. Did you know that you can get those tickets for that

00:03:20sheet? That's right. With Game Time, the official ticketing partner of Barcelona Sports. That is

00:03:23possible. You shouldn't have to worry about when you're buying tickets for your next big event.

00:03:27Game Time is a fast and easy way to buy tickets to all the sports, movies, and comedy and theater

00:03:30events near you. We've got flash deals for certain discounts, zone deals for when you're feeling

00:03:34flexible, and their lowest price guarantee means that if you can find the same seats for anywhere

00:03:37else cheaper, Game Time will credit you for 110% of the difference. Game Time is the best place for

00:03:42last minute seats for up to 60% off your favorite events. So what are you waiting for? I'm going to

00:03:45go get those Gavin DeGraw tickets in Little Rock, Texas right now. Take the guesswork out of buying

00:03:50tickets with Game Time. Download the Game Time app, create an account, and use code BRACKET for

00:03:53$20 off your purchase. Terms apply. Download the Game Time app today. Last minute tickets,

00:03:57lowest prices guaranteed. All right. Bracket submissions. This is a combination of ones I

00:04:03think legitimately just we couldn't because they'd be such bad radio, but also ones that I think are

00:04:07just so bad that they're funny because we couldn't do them basically. The first one being the number

00:04:11five seed. Best places to have sex. Here's the answer, bed. I mean, I don't know where I would

00:04:16do 16 options of the best places to have sex. There are those freaks who like it in a car.

00:04:20Not a real baller. Not a real baller at all. Can you name 16 places better than a bed to have sex?

00:04:29On top of like a bunch of women.

00:04:31A pile of women.

00:04:37That's suggesting ... I'm going to name them because they all ask for credit. Dub V Designs.

00:04:41Also waterbed.

00:04:43That counts as bed.

00:04:44Waterbed.

00:04:44That counts under bed.

00:04:45I guess.

00:04:46Can't have a subsex of bed. That's going to be answer number 12 seed. Top profiling items that

00:04:54you can see one ... If you see someone wearing it, you know everything about that person.

00:04:58Parentheses, long socks and saddles, do-rag, drug rug, yarmulke, Crocs from RSX.

00:05:05I don't hate that one to be honest at all.

00:05:06If you see somebody in a yarmulke, you know everything about them.

00:05:10It's the examples that made me really laugh. That was what really got me. We'll start with you,

00:05:15Tommy. Which one do you think would make for a Worst Bracket episode? Top profiling items

00:05:20or best place to have sex?

00:05:22Minus the anti-Semitism, I don't mind the profiling items. I think that that's

00:05:27pretty decent. The ones to have sex, call me crazy, I'm a sex in bed guy. That's just where

00:05:33I prefer it. I don't think I'd be able to submit more than that. I think that is a worse topic.

00:05:39Submit more than that. That was like the SDM. It's the first thing that came to mind when

00:05:43you said that. I don't know why.

00:05:44You're a freak.

00:05:46One for the profiling. I'll be voting this instance for one down. I'll say the profiling one.

00:05:50No, no. I think sex is worse.

00:05:52I'll vote for the sex one as well. I think the sex one just ... Us talking about sex for an

00:05:56hour straight would have been misery for anybody.

00:06:00Disgusting.

00:06:01Absolutely, yes.

00:06:03Yeah, we're talking about places we love to wail, dude. Hell no.

00:06:10Yeah, no, I concur. Because it's like bed and shower and I don't even like the shower.

00:06:15Slippery.

00:06:16But it would have to be non-occupational though.

00:06:19It is.

00:06:20Because a police hat or stuff that just gives away too much.

00:06:24Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

00:06:25Yeah, that's all I got.

00:06:27So three for the best place to have sex.

00:06:30It's like a fine line because you can't say turban just like you can't say yarmulke.

00:06:36But you could say Dallas Cowboys jersey but not stitched iron-on numbers.

00:06:43I think that would be a good non-cultural apparel that you'd like to judge.

00:06:52I think that would be a good episode.

00:06:54That would actually, yeah, that's a solid idea.

00:07:00That's a great idea.

00:07:02Places to have sex. It's just bed.

00:07:05Yeah, it's really nice.

00:07:06Or your homie's bed.

00:07:08Even if we were called like vanilla for that,

00:07:09what would they say is better than a bed or in the same ballpark as a bed?

00:07:14Well, they're gonna throw out like a couch or something.

00:07:16No, but that couch isn't as good as the bed.

00:07:17Car, couch, sex on it, the beach.

00:07:20But no, the car is like the worst.

00:07:21Get sand everywhere.

00:07:22No, that's not good.

00:07:23I'm just saying what people might submit.

00:07:25Sauna would be miserable.

00:07:26Oh my god, have a heat stroke in there.

00:07:28Oh, yeah.

00:07:29Saunas are hot.

00:07:30Yeah, I mean, that's good though.

00:07:32I don't know.

00:07:33I'm trying.

00:07:33I'm thinking any other place other than the back room of a strip club.

00:07:37There's only one good play.

00:07:38Yeah.

00:07:39The gondola of a skiing mountain.

00:07:41You couldn't put together 15 options that would beat a bed.

00:07:44There's none that would beat a bed.

00:07:44Hadn't we said gondola?

00:07:46No one put a thought of gondola.

00:07:46No one said gondola.

00:07:47Gazebo.

00:07:48Gazebo.

00:07:49The Italy boat thing.

00:07:52Wait, what?

00:07:53Gazebos are good for head.

00:07:56Yeah, Kanye proved that.

00:07:57Yeah.

00:07:58No, that would be gondola.

00:08:00Oh, you're right.

00:08:00Excuse me.

00:08:00What about a grotto?

00:08:02A grotto.

00:08:03Grotto would be nice.

00:08:04I don't want chlorine in the mix.

00:08:05No, because that would wash away the vaginal mucus.

00:08:09I need my vaginal mucus.

00:08:11I love when you waste it in your own sense.

00:08:13I do it a lot.

00:08:14Yeah.

00:08:16I actually had my first kiss in a gazebo.

00:08:17So maybe a little more sexual than we think.

00:08:19Yeah.

00:08:19That's kind of gay.

00:08:20Yeah, a little bit.

00:08:21I had my first kiss at a haunted house.

00:08:23Really?

00:08:24Yeah.

00:08:24Where in the haunted house?

00:08:25That's very important.

00:08:27It was in the slasher trail at Foggy Bottom.

00:08:30It was right after Pennywise, but right before the Jeepers Creepers guy popped out.

00:08:34Oh my God.

00:08:36I bet you felt fireworks though.

00:08:37Yeah.

00:08:38What do you guys want to know the twist?

00:08:39Yeah.

00:08:40I was working at the haunted house.

00:08:45I was Pennywise's victim.

00:08:47I kissed Jeepers.

00:08:48You kissed a fellow employee?

00:08:50Yeah.

00:08:51Okay.

00:08:51Oh, I thought it was like part of the haunted house.

00:08:54I kiss you.

00:08:56That is a haunting thing.

00:08:57Surprise.

00:08:57Sexually abused inside of a house.

00:08:59That would be very scary.

00:09:02KB.

00:09:02That would be a haunted house.

00:09:04Yeah, by far.

00:09:06The bed.

00:09:08What's more comfortable than a bed?

00:09:11If there was something, we'd sleep on it.

00:09:13A love sack?

00:09:14What about a love sack?

00:09:14Beanbag?

00:09:15No.

00:09:16No.

00:09:16Because then you look at the moisture ring from your ass crack.

00:09:22You don't want to fuck on suede.

00:09:24No.

00:09:24It doesn't take very long.

00:09:25That's always been my rule.

00:09:27Rudy.

00:09:28Don't fucking on suede.

00:09:29Yeah.

00:09:30The only argument I can make for the sex one would be if you only did hypothetical,

00:09:34not hypothetical, but fantastical places.

00:09:36Even then, what would an example be?

00:09:38The Oval Office.

00:09:39But I agree.

00:09:40It would just be silly.

00:09:43You'd have to do insane ridiculous places.

00:09:45The Taj Mahal or the Bass Pro Shops.

00:09:49Fictional places you want to fuck at.

00:09:51Yeah.

00:09:51That'd be cool.

00:09:52Yeah.

00:09:53But overall, I like...

00:09:53I'm really taking in the ambiance, I feel like.

00:09:56Like the Taj Mahal?

00:10:00I don't know.

00:10:00Never mind.

00:10:01Oh, you're not focusing it?

00:10:02You're focused on the sex?

00:10:03Yeah.

00:10:03I don't think the Oval Office would change much.

00:10:05The brain doesn't work that way.

00:10:07Yeah.

00:10:07That's a good point.

00:10:08We're just looking at those titties.

00:10:10Of course you are.

00:10:13So the sex is going to move on.

00:10:14Now we have the number four seed versus the 13th seed.

00:10:17The four seed is Best Adjectives.

00:10:21I love this one.

00:10:24I'm going to have to go with Best.

00:10:28The Best Adjectives winner being Best would be really funny.

00:10:32So Best Adjectives versus the number 13 seed.

00:10:35And Best Adjectives, by the way, was from Poolside Patent.

00:10:37And that's going up against Best 13th Seed.

00:10:40Best Weed Strain from Dazed in Detroit.

00:10:44Dazed in Detroit.

00:10:49So listening to us talk about the best weed strains,

00:10:52or listening to us debate the best adjectives,

00:10:54which one do you think would be worse, Rudy?

00:10:57I think the weed strains would be way worse.

00:10:59Yeah.

00:11:00Because one, at the end of the day,

00:11:03you're arriving at the same conclusion.

00:11:05Like you can't differentiate highs that much.

00:11:08And none of us know enough about weed.

00:11:10Indica.

00:11:11Indica.

00:11:14That's my point.

00:11:14Fellow Chiefer.

00:11:17Yeah.

00:11:17So the weed one is by far worse, but funnier.

00:11:21But funnier.

00:11:22KB?

00:11:23I like the adjective one.

00:11:24I like, you know, anything with phonetics.

00:11:26So, you know, I think ugly is a good one.

00:11:30Yeah, there's a few.

00:11:31But the weed one is the worst thing ever.

00:11:35Yeah.

00:11:36Dude, the strains of weed, like Indica and Sativa,

00:11:40which cannabis researchers don't even know the difference between those two.

00:11:45And us specifically debating it.

00:11:47Yeah, we know nothing about this.

00:11:49Horrible radio.

00:11:50Yeah.

00:11:51Nick?

00:11:52That would be the worst podcast ever.

00:11:56And we've done some really, really bad ones.

00:12:00I think adjectives has potential to be funny,

00:12:02just for like that final round when you're debating.

00:12:06But I can't even think of an adjective.

00:12:09Jiggly versus bounce.

00:12:10Jiggly versus bounce.

00:12:12Jiggly's great.

00:12:13Bounce is good too.

00:12:15Good versus really good.

00:12:17Or best versus worst.

00:12:20Yeah, there's smoky is a good one I like.

00:12:23Oh, yeah.

00:12:24I'm starting that one.

00:12:26Yeah, that would be good.

00:12:27So I'm going with weed.

00:12:28Belligerent.

00:12:29Yeah, there's some great adjectives.

00:12:31So, Rowan?

00:12:34Worst adjectives would be a bad bracket.

00:12:38Yeah.

00:12:39Adjectives that aren't that descriptive.

00:12:41Yeah.

00:12:42Most mild adjectives.

00:12:44Roundish.

00:12:45It's a mouthful.

00:12:46Kinda.

00:12:47Kinda.

00:12:47Is that an adjective?

00:12:49I think.

00:12:50No.

00:12:50Nah, I don't think so.

00:12:52It could be.

00:12:54It's got a preface an adjective, right?

00:12:56Like kind of fat.

00:12:58Yeah.

00:12:58Yeah, that's true.

00:13:00Nondescriptive adjectives.

00:13:02Oh, it's an adverb then.

00:13:03Adverb.

00:13:03What's a nondescriptive adjective?

00:13:06Now I'm just finding adjectives that mean nondescript.

00:13:08That's not an alpha one.

00:13:09Like what?

00:13:10Like, no, just like you're basically

00:13:12ending up in a thesaurus or synonyms of nondescript.

00:13:15Dull is a horrible word.

00:13:17Dull.

00:13:17But it fits.

00:13:18It does fit, but it sucks to say.

00:13:20See, we're already doing it.

00:13:20Yeah.

00:13:21Oh, sorry, Owen.

00:13:22You're going with the weed strings?

00:13:23Yeah.

00:13:24That would be a tough one.

00:13:25Mm-hmm.

00:13:25Really tough one.

00:13:26Really tough one.

00:13:28Yeah, I'm going to go with that as well.

00:13:29I mean, I don't know any besides sativa and indica,

00:13:31and I really don't know anything about either of them.

00:13:33Besides saying indica and indica.

00:13:35Hybrids.

00:13:36Hybrids are big.

00:13:38Everything I know about weed strains are just fake,

00:13:39made up weed strains from like movies and TV.

00:13:41Like that's literally, I don't know any real ones.

00:13:45And next we have the eight seed versus the nine seed.

00:13:46The eight seed is best European countries to live in from Thomas.

00:13:50Don't know why you'd want to hear that from us.

00:13:53None of us have ever lived in Europe.

00:13:54I don't hate that one.

00:13:56Have any of us lived in Europe?

00:13:58No, but you can get a picture.

00:14:00Yeah, KB's put a lot of geoguessr.

00:14:03You think he could earnestly give advice on the best European country to live in?

00:14:06No advice.

00:14:07I could just go off of what I think other people would think.

00:14:11That's fair.

00:14:11Okay, that's going up against the number nine seed.

00:14:13I love this one, but we could, I don't know,

00:14:16animated characters you'd want as your barber.

00:14:21Wait, that's awesome.

00:14:22That's so good.

00:14:23That's awesome.

00:14:24That is a really good one.

00:14:27Oh my God.

00:14:27That's hilarious.

00:14:28It's asinine as fuck.

00:14:31I told you, half of these are legitimate bad,

00:14:32but the other half are just ones I think are really funny that I don't think we'd be able

00:14:35to do, but animated.

00:14:36No, I think that'd be good.

00:14:37Someone masculine, but calm.

00:14:40A calming presence.

00:14:42Steady hand.

00:14:43Russian, probably.

00:14:45Russian.

00:14:46I feel like most of them are Russian.

00:14:47I don't want them starting a conversation, but I don't want them to be like mute.

00:14:50Right, right.

00:14:50I think the professor, which the father of the Powerpuff Girls would be great.

00:14:56I don't know him.

00:14:56He doesn't have a good cut.

00:14:57Anyone but Doof and Schmertz.

00:14:59Yeah, he'd be awful.

00:15:00I like Doof and Schmertz.

00:15:02You're the Fairly OddParents guy that like jitters every time you say it.

00:15:05That's Doof.

00:15:05Dr. Crocker?

00:15:06That's Dr. Crocker.

00:15:07Mr. Crocker.

00:15:07That's Mr. Crocker.

00:15:08Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:15:10So which animated character would you want to be your barber versus what European country

00:15:16would you want to, do you think people should live, or the best European country to live in?

00:15:20These are significantly better than some ideas we've had.

00:15:23Oh yeah, Kajak.

00:15:26I'm not shitting on thee.

00:15:28The barber one would be the most asinine, but captivating 90 minutes of podcasting ever done.

00:15:35Let's do that next week.

00:15:38I think as a positive, yeah.

00:15:39Let's do that.

00:15:40So I'll say the worst one is the European countries.

00:15:44I don't think we could offer anything to that.

00:15:46Like which country do you think look the best, or like think of anything.

00:15:49I think I would be like Croatia, Italy.

00:15:51I know which one's not.

00:15:52Don't go to Ukraine.

00:15:53Spain, Portugal.

00:15:55Don't go to Russia.

00:15:56I know where not to go.

00:15:57That's about it.

00:15:59I'd go for the European countries as well.

00:16:02European countries, but yeah.

00:16:06Yeah, I just don't know how it would work.

00:16:08Nick?

00:16:09Yeah, we're just too uninformed.

00:16:11If we were like, it was like Donny and Julio and Rone, well-traveled people, that would be good.

00:16:19We wouldn't know shit.

00:16:20But we would know a lot of shit about the best animated part.

00:16:23Yes, of course.

00:16:25Well, I think we would definitely be able to defend our case more.

00:16:28Yeah, for sure.

00:16:31I love that idea.

00:16:32So you're going to go with the European countries as well?

00:16:34Yeah, that's worse.

00:16:35Yeah.

00:16:36Rudy?

00:16:36Yeah, I mean, it's a no brainer.

00:16:37You could make an argument that our ignorance and just basing it off stereotypes and possibly

00:16:42racism could be funny, but that wouldn't last very long.

00:16:46The animated, or the, yeah, the animated barber.

00:16:49There's a lot of runway with that.

00:16:51Yeah, European countries.

00:16:53Johnny Bravo would probably be a pretty good barber.

00:16:55No, these two.

00:16:55Nah, he'd try to finger blast you.

00:16:58Yeah.

00:16:58He's too horny.

00:16:59He also doesn't want competition.

00:17:00No, he wouldn't want you to look good.

00:17:01I'm trying to think of a non, a cartoon who isn't cartoonish.

00:17:06What about Mr. Krebs' big back daughter?

00:17:09I think of his daughter.

00:17:11Yeah.

00:17:11Yeah, he would be tough because he probably can't handle a scissor.

00:17:13Well, no, he says it, yeah.

00:17:14Yeah, the daughter should be pretty good.

00:17:16I think, I don't know which one you said it, but you want a strong, masculine, kind of

00:17:19silent guy, right?

00:17:22Like Squidward?

00:17:22Calming, yeah.

00:17:23Yeah, goes coast to coast.

00:17:25I feel like would cut hair nice.

00:17:26Squidward.

00:17:27Ray Mundo, maybe?

00:17:28Uh, Frylock would.

00:17:30Frylock?

00:17:31Yeah, from Aquateen Hunger Force.

00:17:32From Aquateen Hunger Force.

00:17:34I haven't seen that.

00:17:36That seems like a show you would have watched a million times, Rudy, if I had to guess.

00:17:38I would just take Lola Bonnie.

00:17:39Maybe the grandpa from Rocket Power.

00:17:41Ray Mundo is from Rocket Power.

00:17:42Oh, fuck.

00:17:42Yeah.

00:17:42I was blanking out myself.

00:17:43Ray Mundo would be able to.

00:17:44Oh, yeah, he might be the winner.

00:17:46Yeah.

00:17:47But he's like balding.

00:17:48He doesn't have like a good cut.

00:17:49Tito might be.

00:17:50Tito would be pretty good.

00:17:51No, Tito's too chill.

00:17:52He doesn't care if you look good or bad.

00:17:54He would try to instill his fucking values on you when you're just trying to look good

00:17:57and crisp.

00:17:57I might go for a woman.

00:17:59A woman?

00:18:00A magician.

00:18:00Swanson's wife.

00:18:02Joe Swanson's?

00:18:03Yeah.

00:18:04Yeah, she's patient.

00:18:05The constantly pregnant lady.

00:18:06He's used to dealing guys in chairs.

00:18:08Forever pregnant.

00:18:09Yeah, Swanson's wife.

00:18:10Swanson's wife.

00:18:12Bonnie.

00:18:14She's pregnant all the time, though.

00:18:15Oh, her voice is so.

00:18:18Yeah.

00:18:18I feel like you could rely on Lois, too.

00:18:20Yeah, I think she'd be pretty good.

00:18:22Lois probably just does like one cut.

00:18:23She'd want you in and out.

00:18:24She wouldn't care.

00:18:25Yeah, but Lois would be.

00:18:26Okay, let's do this next.

00:18:27Lois would be a quick job.

00:18:30This is wonderful.

00:18:31I think we're actually gonna do this next week.

00:18:32Next up is the number one seed versus 16 seed Cheyenne game.

00:18:35We'll do the Cheyenne game first.

00:18:37If you're in the Cheyenne game of the worst practice,

00:18:41I don't know if that means you're really bad or you're not that bad.

00:18:46This one is one where one person here is gonna love it,

00:18:50and everyone else here is gonna be like,

00:18:52yeah, we might be able to contribute.

00:18:53We're not sure.

00:18:54Best Pokemon to party with parentheses.

00:18:56I'm begging.

00:18:57Oh, that'd be so sick.

00:19:01Best Pokemon to party.

00:19:02You guys could just look at it based off appearance.

00:19:04I could do that.

00:19:05Yeah.

00:19:05Yeah, that's similar to the animated barber.

00:19:08Like if you look at Snorlax, for example, Nick,

00:19:10you don't want to party with.

00:19:12You wouldn't want to party.

00:19:13No, you don't want to party with like Blaziken.

00:19:16Yeah, but like if you just looked at Snorlax,

00:19:18you're like, that's a chill ass dude, right?

00:19:19That's a party guy.

00:19:22Oh, no, that's just a fat.

00:19:23You don't fat sleepy guy.

00:19:24So I know.

00:19:25Are there any you could comfortably trip with?

00:19:29Trip?

00:19:32Definitely.

00:19:33Definitely.

00:19:36Dark Magician.

00:19:37No, you'd creep out.

00:19:38I think Harpy Lady would be nice to trip with.

00:19:41Okay.

00:19:42Exodia in pieces.

00:19:43I'll talk to you more about that.

00:19:44Left leg of Exodia was chill.

00:19:49Maneater bug sucks.

00:19:50Summon Skull would be rule to trip with.

00:19:52He tripped.

00:19:52Yu-Gi-Oh to trip with.

00:19:53Yeah.

00:19:53Summon Skull.

00:19:54I've actually I've microdosed with Summon Skull and he was solid.

00:20:00Good vibes.

00:20:01Me and Pot of Gold.

00:20:05Pot of Greed, absolutely not.

00:20:07That's a nightmare of one rotation is Pot of Greed.

00:20:10No, dude, as soon as you start tripping with Pot of Greed, he's pulling up fucking Live

00:20:13Leak and you're like.

00:20:17Yeah, that's the worst case.

00:20:19Oh, dude.

00:20:20And he's looking at you with that big fucking smile.

00:20:22Dude, he has the biggest smile.

00:20:24Yeah, I don't fuck with that.

00:20:26Celtic Guardian would be he would take care of you.

00:20:29You wouldn't trip.

00:20:31He wouldn't trip and he'd be like, you do it and I'm gonna make sure you have the best

00:20:34experience.

00:20:34He's going to take you to a field.

00:20:36You're going to get like homemade bread.

00:20:38Trip setters are important.

00:20:38That's amazing.

00:20:39Yeah, trip setters are important.

00:20:41Celtic Guardian would take care of you.

00:20:44I feel like none of the dragon ones would be cool.

00:20:46You'd have to do like one of the more.

00:20:47Oh no, but Time Wizard would rock.

00:20:49Yeah.

00:20:51Time Wizard would rule to trip with.

00:20:53Beast King Barbados.

00:20:55That doesn't seem like a.

00:20:56No, no, and none of the god cards.

00:20:58Obelisk the Tormentor, no.

00:21:01No, no, no, you definitely do not want to trip with Obelisk the Tormentor.

00:21:04Biggest mistake of my life is when I dropped acid with Obelisk the Tormentor.

00:21:11Too much.

00:21:11Oh, what a flub that was.

00:21:13What an oversight on my end.

00:21:16Wish I could take that one back.

00:21:17Two tabs with Obelisk.

00:21:19Two troops and a lion and a icebreaker.

00:21:27Is it okay if I bring my boy Obelisk the Tormentor?

00:21:30He's cool, I promise.

00:21:31Yeah.

00:21:33Hottest Latina woman, White Sox Dave Special from Gable Maker.

00:21:38That would have to be like an 180 team, Brack.

00:21:44Most underrated Olympic sport from Matt.

00:21:48Snooze Fest.

00:21:52Best non-pornographic magazine to jerk off to from Sauce Boss Joss.

00:21:56That's like a Anchorman type joke.

00:21:58Yeah.

00:21:58Snap Brothers.

00:22:00Good housekeeping, right?

00:22:02They literally do, like, yeah.

00:22:03Yeah.

00:22:03This one I really like because the ending is what really gets me.

00:22:07Because the beginning is kind of understandable.

00:22:09And I'm at the...

00:22:11Most demeaning non-explicit name to be called.

00:22:14For example, Buddy Lacky Reward.

00:22:21Non-demeaning terms to be called.

00:22:23Non-explicit or demeaning non-explicit terms to be called.

00:22:27That's pretty good.

00:22:27That's good, yeah.

00:22:28Spongebob characters you'd like to have a beer with, parentheses.

00:22:31That's another good one.

00:22:32Clemmer's attendance is mandatory.

00:22:35Oh, Clemmer doesn't even know who Spongebob is.

00:22:37No, he doesn't.

00:22:38I was so proud of that.

00:22:40He couldn't identify him in a lineup.

00:22:41I don't know all these things.

00:22:43So he'd make a nightmare.

00:22:44You're forgetting, I'm 40.

00:22:47No one's forgetting.

00:22:48And then lastly, Blackest thing a person can do.

00:22:52Ooh, foul.

00:22:55Just not one for us.

00:22:57Just can't do that.

00:22:58Best Pokemon to party with.

00:23:00Hottest Latino woman.

00:23:01Most underrated Olympic sport.

00:23:03Best non-porno magazine to jerk off to.

00:23:04Most demeaning non-explicit name to be called.

00:23:07Spongebob characters you'd like to have a beer with.

00:23:08Or Blackest thing a person could do.

00:23:10Rudy, which one do you think should go up against the one seat?

00:23:13I'm picking the worst.

00:23:14Worst.

00:23:17Actual worst thing for us to discuss.

00:23:19There was a standout in that.

00:23:20The Olympic sport.

00:23:21Or the Blackest things to do.

00:23:24Because that would not be good for us, but it would be good.

00:23:27I would love to hear Mason Cameron do that.

00:23:32No, I'd love to hear Tommy.

00:23:37I'm not even going to give an example.

00:23:42It would be a good, good-ass podcast.

00:23:44It would be funny.

00:23:44It would just have to be for...

00:23:46It would have to be the farewell.

00:23:51So one for the most underrated Olympic sport.

00:23:52Bracket farewell episode slash Blackest things.

00:23:58Uh, KB?

00:24:01Yeah, the Olympic one would just be so bad.

00:24:04The only person that could do it is Jeff.

00:24:06He's the only person that would be able to even contribute to this at all,

00:24:08is the underrated Olympic sport.

00:24:11I'm an Olympic fan, but it just wouldn't...

00:24:1416, yeah, no.

00:24:15No.

00:24:16Nick?

00:24:17I'm looking through Olympic sports.

00:24:21I think they're all pretty properly rated.

00:24:24It would be boring.

00:24:26Another one for Olympic?

00:24:28Another one for Olympic?

00:24:29I'd go for Olympic as well.

00:24:29I think it'd be horrible.

00:24:30Yeah, same.

00:24:31I can't even name 16 Olympic sports off the top of my head.

00:24:33So Olympics is going to...

00:24:35Our most underrated Olympic sport is going to go up against our number one seed.

00:24:38Uh, Best Dorito from Nick's experience.

00:24:43There's 16?

00:24:45Maybe, but...

00:24:46I don't think there's 16 Dorito flips.

00:24:48Oh, that would go round and round.

00:24:49An hour of that?

00:24:51This guy just wanted to hear us do like nacho cheese versus Cool Ranch.

00:24:55One full plate.

00:24:57This guy's like, I just need to get to the bottom of this.

00:24:59Like, I need you guys to take some of the best...

00:25:01What would the Cheyenne game be?

00:25:04Yeah, Frito-Lay.

00:25:07Not a Dorito.

00:25:08Not a Dorito.

00:25:10No, I know.

00:25:10That's why I'm saying it.

00:25:11It'd be like 3D Doritos.

00:25:12It'd be like the gimmick ones, I guess.

00:25:14But they'd have to be in the 16th options because there's not that many.

00:25:17You could do it with flavors of Asian Lays.

00:25:20Have you ever seen those?

00:25:21Oh, yeah.

00:25:22They got crazy ones.

00:25:24Dorito...

00:25:25How many could there possibly be?

00:25:27Yeah, like, dude.

00:25:27Japan has like flavorings of like extinct beasts on some of their snacks.

00:25:32You could have Optimus whatever.

00:25:35Oh, yeah.

00:25:36You could have like ocean flavors.

00:25:38They have ocean flavor.

00:25:38They have every single metal.

00:25:43Yeah, they have asphalt.

00:25:44Yeah.

00:25:45Rare Earth Minerals flavored Dorito.

00:25:48Dude, sweet.

00:25:50This one's flavored like...

00:25:50This bag of Lays is flavored like dice.

00:25:53It was so good.

00:25:54This one, you've got to try it.

00:25:56You've got to try the copper wire.

00:25:57Copper wire.

00:25:57Yeah.

00:25:58Loose copper wire.

00:26:00There is like a decent chunk of flavors.

00:26:02Just like that would be so painful.

00:26:03So Doritos versus Olympics.

00:26:05Tommy.

00:26:06Yeah, I think Doritos is worse.

00:26:08I don't know if we could even get to 16.

00:26:10I mean, maybe we could do worse Dorito flavors.

00:26:12We're doing all these gross ones.

00:26:13No, it would still be bad.

00:26:15It would always be bad.

00:26:16Yeah.

00:26:17So I'll go Doritos as worse.

00:26:18Doritos.

00:26:19I'd pick Doritos as well.

00:26:20Doritos.

00:26:21Doritos easy.

00:26:22Nick.

00:26:23Yeah.

00:26:23Doritos.

00:26:24Doritos.

00:26:25You can't even fill out a bracket.

00:26:27Yeah, like you can't.

00:26:28There's like not enough flavors.

00:26:30This is email address at doritos.com.

00:26:33Yeah.

00:26:35We need some free advertising.

00:26:35Who's the guy that submitted?

00:26:36Nick Severins.

00:26:39It's Cervaccio5.

00:26:42Cervicino.

00:26:42I don't know.

00:26:43But anyway, Doritos is going to move on.

00:26:45Before we get to the next half of the bracket,

00:26:47let's hear from Roan Apparel.

00:26:48Shout out to our boys, Roan.

00:26:49Sucks finding stuff to wear all the time.

00:26:51We all know it.

00:26:52We all dress like slops sometimes.

00:26:54Luckily, Roan's taking that guesswork out.

00:26:56Men's costumes were due for a radical reinvention.

00:26:58Roan stepped up to the challenge.

00:26:59Their commuter collection is the most comfortable,

00:27:01breathable, and flexible set of products known to man.

00:27:03And here's why.

00:27:03They got products for every occasion.

00:27:05They help you get ready for every occasion

00:27:06with the commuter collection,

00:27:06which offers the world's most comfortable pants,

00:27:08dress shirts, quarter zips, and polos.

00:27:09You never have to worry about what to wear

00:27:10with the Roan commuter collection.

00:27:12Mobility is everything.

00:27:13They're comfortable four-way stretch fabric

00:27:14and has breathability and flexibility

00:27:17that leaves you free to enjoy the life

00:27:18that throws you away from the commute to work

00:27:19after 18 holes of golf.

00:27:21They also help you feel confident without the hassle.

00:27:23The wrinkle-free wrinkle release technology

00:27:26helps wrinkles disappear as you stretch

00:27:28and wear the products.

00:27:29It's that easy, which I love

00:27:30because my shirt gets wrinkled all the time,

00:27:31even the shirt I'm wearing right now.

00:27:33With gold fusion anti-odor technology,

00:27:34you'll be smelling fresh, clean, and all day long.

00:27:37On top of that, the Roan is 100% machine washable,

00:27:39so you can ditch the dry cleaner altogether.

00:27:41We love Roan here.

00:27:42The commuter collection can get you through any workday

00:27:44and straight into whatever comes next.

00:27:45Head to roan.com slash bracket

00:27:47news promo code bracket

00:27:4820% off your entire order.

00:27:49That's 20% off your entire order

00:27:50when you head to roan, R-H-O-N-E.com slash bracket

00:27:53news code bracket.

00:27:54It's time to find your corner office comfort.

00:27:57All right, other half of the bracket,

00:27:59we have the six seed versus the 11 seed.

00:28:02The six seed is, okay, there's a long one.

00:28:05Top places to be from that make people think

00:28:08you're kind of trashy, parentheses,

00:28:10not horrible like Flint or Wheeling,

00:28:13but like somebody grew up in say,

00:28:15Myrtle Beach or Panama City.

00:28:17They didn't leave a name.

00:28:17Oh, okay.

00:28:18I don't hate this.

00:28:19Wait, that's my wheelhouse.

00:28:22Wordy for the graphic.

00:28:23Wordy for the graphic, for sure.

00:28:24It's going to be a tough one.

00:28:25And that's going to go up against the number 11 seed.

00:28:29Which U.S. president would win a Hell in a Cell match?

00:28:32Oh, that's a great one.

00:28:34How many presidents do you know enough information on?

00:28:37I think they would win in a fight.

00:28:38Roosevelt probably would.

00:28:39Teddy Roosevelt, I think.

00:28:40Oh, there's a link.

00:28:43He got bitched by the world champion boxer.

00:28:46I mean, Taff is coming off the top.

00:28:48But he's going up against other presidents.

00:28:51Yeah, I know.

00:28:51I'm just saying he lost.

00:28:52Oh, FDR would suck.

00:28:53FDR would struggle with the whole wheelchair thing.

00:28:56Yeah, that'd be tough.

00:28:57Oh, actually, I like this.

00:28:59JFK, obviously.

00:29:00JFK, Owen Harding.

00:29:01He's a fucking mountain.

00:29:02JFK would get CTE in a minute.

00:29:05Like two seconds.

00:29:05I don't know why, but I feel like Abe

00:29:06would just not be a fighter.

00:29:08No, he was a wrestler.

00:29:09He's a wrestler, yeah.

00:29:11He'd be the top pick, I think.

00:29:16I was wrong as fuck.

00:29:17Obama, Grant, Ulysses.

00:29:20I feel like George Washington's been through some shit.

00:29:24Yeah, I think I'll be one of the older guys.

00:29:27He was fucking big, George Washington.

00:29:29Nixon would play dirty.

00:29:32Weapons, brass knuckles.

00:29:33He would bite.

00:29:34He would twist your neck.

00:29:34Oh, yeah, I think he might.

00:29:35Oh, he'd be a good heel.

00:29:36Andrew Jackson, he was a tough son of a gun.

00:29:39Only against, like, Native American wrestlers.

00:29:42So if the bracket is who'd win against a Native American in a cell match.

00:29:49I feel like Nixon would fight in a suit.

00:29:51He would still.

00:29:51Nixon.

00:29:52I think Nixon would win.

00:29:53That would be a great one.

00:29:55So places, that whole places to be from that make people think you're trashy versus the

00:29:59U.S. President hell in a cell match.

00:30:01Rudy.

00:30:02Uh, the the places one has a chance, but it's like too wordy.

00:30:09And then, like, how do you whittle down the exact type of town?

00:30:14Yeah, it's like you could say, like, Pyongyang, North Korea, like that probably be.

00:30:19I think it would just turn into a poorest city bracket.

00:30:21Right.

00:30:21It would be clarified.

00:30:23It's not just poorest city.

00:30:24He didn't say worst.

00:30:26Yeah, he says you don't go too extreme.

00:30:28So someone like Bakersfield or.

00:30:30Yeah, yeah.

00:30:31Sacramento.

00:30:32Fresno.

00:30:33Fresno.

00:30:33Fresno is a good.

00:30:34It would probably be some sort of inland California city.

00:30:36Tempe.

00:30:37A lot of Florida.

00:30:38Yeah, but the presidential one is a lot more fun.

00:30:42That rules.

00:30:42Yeah.

00:30:43So I'm going to go with the worst one would be the.

00:30:46The places one.

00:30:47Yeah, but not as bad as I think.

00:30:48Not as bad as I thought.

00:30:48Not as bad.

00:30:49KB.

00:30:52For the sake of entertainment for everyone.

00:30:54Yeah, the cities would be worse, but I would have a blast.

00:30:57KB made us do this when he gets all right.

00:30:59Yeah, Nick.

00:31:02It's the cities one, but it's not that bad.

00:31:06Owen.

00:31:07Yeah, I'll do cities as well.

00:31:09Cities as well.

00:31:09I'd vote for cities as well.

00:31:10It's just that it's fun to do an exercise.

00:31:13I think you need people that have been to enough places.

00:31:15And if it was just a regional thing like, hey, we're going to do the worst.

00:31:17Yeah, actually places in New York.

00:31:19It's also more mean spirited.

00:31:21The other one's just like a fun hypothetical.

00:31:22Yeah, Tommy.

00:31:24Yeah, I don't think either terrible, but I actually like the idea of the president.

00:31:30I love it.

00:31:31I'm putting a start out.

00:31:33Oh, no, I'm going to do the city one.

00:31:37I think we should do a Yu-Gi-Oh to trip with, though.

00:31:39Yu-Gi-Oh monsters.

00:31:40I saved it.

00:31:41It's right here.

00:31:42I like the trip one in particular.

00:31:44Maybe I can show them to you guys for the first time ever during the break.

00:31:48Yeah, we would need a little fun fact sheet, like a picture of a fun fact sheet.

00:31:52Should we fly to Vegas for that one?

00:31:54Yeah, we should.

00:31:55Maybe we do it from Nashville.

00:31:56Yeah, I'm going to call David and ask if he can find us.

00:31:58Probably do it from Nashville.

00:31:59Yeah, we'll do a live show from the Barcelona.

00:32:01Yes, next up is the three seed versus the 14 seat.

00:32:04The three seed is what's the worst survivable pain someone can experience, emotional or

00:32:10physical.

00:32:13That is the fucking worst.

00:32:15That is a bad bracket.

00:32:18It's so dour.

00:32:20AIDS.

00:32:21Losing your entire family.

00:32:22Yeah, it's so bad.

00:32:24It's so bleak.

00:32:25And that's going up against number 14 seed.

00:32:28The Holocaust smokes must be on.

00:32:31That's from Sheldon.

00:32:32That was the only information.

00:32:33That one sounds great.

00:32:34So, I mean, easy path to the final for Hillary.

00:32:37But Eva Braun, of course, a dude named Sheldon's like, let's get worse.

00:32:43Women.

00:32:43Yeah, I don't know.

00:32:44It's worse.

00:32:45Shut your trap, Sheldon.

00:32:48Sheldon is the worst name.

00:32:50Sheldon is the worst name.

00:32:51Of course, he's submitting worse to women.

00:32:54Why won't they look at me?

00:32:56Worst women from Sheldon versus worst pain someone can experience, emotional or physical.

00:33:02Tommy.

00:33:02Yeah, the worst women want to.

00:33:04KB may go home tonight and do the geography one.

00:33:06I may do worse one.

00:33:08So I think the worst one is, I mean, just be the saddest hour and a half of all time.

00:33:13The pain one is it was unbelievable when I couldn't believe that one.

00:33:17Oh, yeah, both not good.

00:33:19But the pain one.

00:33:21The pain one's worse.

00:33:22Three to nothing right now.

00:33:23Tommy, who's in your worst women finals?

00:33:25Is it Casey Anthony versus overweight?

00:33:30Or random fat girl I saw a few days ago.

00:33:36So three to nothing for the worst pain, Nick.

00:33:40That would be so fucking depressing and a god awful.

00:33:43Listen, yeah, really bad.

00:33:45Think worse so far.

00:33:47Worse so far, KB.

00:33:48I'm not.

00:33:49I think it's morbid and grim, but I think it's pretty fascinating to get some like out of the.

00:33:57You know, yeah, that's the pain one.

00:34:00Pain one.

00:34:01Rudy.

00:34:02Yeah, obviously, I'm like thinking that crowd crush burning alive crowd crush.

00:34:07Yeah, in the finals, guys about like mass shooting versus like, it's just like it wouldn't be fun.

00:34:12Nothing.

00:34:12What's the longest?

00:34:15What's the longest?

00:34:17Each of them were six years apart.

00:34:19So you got used to having three.

00:34:21Then you lost one.

00:34:21Then you got this one.

00:34:24That would be terrible.

00:34:25It's like growing your hair out.

00:34:26It's always in that awkward stage.

00:34:30So the pain is going to move on.

00:34:31Now we have the number seven seed versus the 10 seat.

00:34:33The seven seed is best dirty attire.

00:34:38Spread the different jerseys.

00:34:40Well, I got another name of the guy that submitted this.

00:34:42Well, that's it.

00:34:44Different jerseys.

00:34:45Hawaiian.

00:34:45Who's the guy that submitted it?

00:34:46What's his name?

00:34:48I know this guy.

00:34:49He replies to our stuff a lot.

00:34:50Now that I'll do like I'm the situation.

00:34:52I mean, yeah, of course.

00:34:54Oh, you know what?

00:34:56Tell me I'm story t shirts.

00:34:58Those are good.

00:34:58Oh, those are damn good already.

00:35:03And this one actually like would love to do but it's it's I don't know if he'd be able to do it

00:35:07without certain people involved.

00:35:08Gay things that straight guys should steal.

00:35:11Oh, I don't hate that.

00:35:12Oh, I'm good with that.

00:35:13So I can get straight now.

00:35:18Imagine if you could get your friend to suck your dick and not be gay, though.

00:35:21Yeah, yeah.

00:35:22That'd be sick.

00:35:24So let's start with you, Rudy.

00:35:25Yeah, that would be sick.

00:35:28Ken Jack, I got news for you, bud.

00:35:31Gay things that straight guys steal versus best dirty attire.

00:35:34Which one do you think is worse?

00:35:35Rudy?

00:35:37The dirty one is worse because it's just the unison of like a barstool podcast.

00:35:44Dirty attire.

00:35:45And like there's just no but the main page post comments would be amazing.

00:35:50I wouldn't be surprised if we've posted a graphic like that to the main.

00:35:54I'm searching their Twitter right now.

00:35:55Definitely.

00:35:56Chuck Daso is like grinding that one out.

00:35:58I could see that bar still had a dirty era.

00:36:00I remember it.

00:36:01Dirty scissor.

00:36:02Yeah, we didn't have an era, KB.

00:36:04We had a scissor.

00:36:07Let's see from.

00:36:08Yeah, that one's a dirty scissor.

00:36:10Oh, boy.

00:36:11Yeah.

00:36:12Those men's L. It's already barstool posted this.

00:36:17March 4th, 2018.

00:36:19Oh, what do they say?

00:36:22Top 10 dirty jerseys.

00:36:25It's first overall Vince Carter throwback Raptors.

00:36:30Michael Jordan tune squad.

00:36:32I mean, the main account has posted dirty as recently as 2023 August 2023.

00:36:37A video of a bunch of guys dressed like George Washington doing the gritty.

00:36:40But the caption Boston T. Dirty.

00:36:43I mean, that's a good pun.

00:36:45I wonder who did that.

00:36:47Holy shit.

00:36:47That's rough.

00:36:48They didn't leave most of them.

00:36:49I feel like we had way more mentions of Daria.

00:36:51There's only like five I could find.

00:36:52That's crazy.

00:36:54So, Rudy, you're going to go with dirty attire, KB.

00:36:59So, I mean, dirty attire is obviously worse, but I'm trying to think of like.

00:37:04Gay things we could steal.

00:37:07They just like party hard.

00:37:10If it was like reverse, it'd be white blood cells.

00:37:12I don't know what the answer would be.

00:37:13Yeah, there's might not be enough.

00:37:17Listening to Troy Savian.

00:37:19Is that his name?

00:37:20Thank you.

00:37:21I knew it, but I didn't want to get it right.

00:37:22I'll get pink cocktails back.

00:37:25That's not even a gay move.

00:37:26No, it's not.

00:37:26It's not even a girl move.

00:37:28You do that.

00:37:29I do that.

00:37:30I know.

00:37:30That's why I brought it up and said, right?

00:37:32I think then we've already kind of stolen it then.

00:37:35Yeah, no, I'm straight as hell.

00:37:36What's the coolest gay move?

00:37:38The first black president.

00:37:40I believe you're going to get killed for that one.

00:37:47They're going to kill you for that one.

00:37:48Why are you talking like that, Tommy?

00:37:50You're implying Obama's gay.

00:37:52Well, that's his brother, right?

00:37:54Yeah, his chef did that.

00:37:56They killed the chef.

00:37:57No way.

00:37:58Yeah.

00:37:58Oh, yeah.

00:37:59Oh, shit.

00:38:00You fell off a rock into the ocean.

00:38:02Okay.

00:38:04I just there's not enough there, but because it's so stupid.

00:38:08I'll go with darty, darty attire.

00:38:11Us trying to discuss that through our disgust would be very funny.

00:38:15I think it'll be a really funny episode.

00:38:17Discussion.

00:38:18A dead serious.

00:38:18Best darty attire.

00:38:19We're being dead serious.

00:38:21The semifinals.

00:38:22I'm stuck between the Bill Murray tune squad and a Gold's gym stringer.

00:38:26It would be funny to do it like if we all dressed in darty gear and took it dead seriously,

00:38:32like as dartiers.

00:38:33Yes.

00:38:33Like that might have potential.

00:38:36So I'm going with the gay going with the gays.

00:38:40Owen.

00:38:42Oh, I'm saying darties.

00:38:43Worse.

00:38:44Darties.

00:38:45Worse.

00:38:45Right.

00:38:46It's I think I kind of believe I kind of like it could be funny.

00:38:49The darty one.

00:38:50And I almost could now the more KB has kind of convinced me there might not be enough

00:38:54things for us to list on the gate.

00:38:56I think if we thought about it for like an hour and if we talk to Joey and Pat, Nick,

00:38:59were you just arguing for darty tooth?

00:39:01Didn't you mean to vote?

00:39:02I think darty would be a good episode.

00:39:04The only thing that gay people that difference differentiates us from gay people is sex with

00:39:09the same gender.

00:39:10Really?

00:39:12It's easier for them to talk to women.

00:39:14We wouldn't want that feeling up your touching.

00:39:17Yeah, touching the female friend.

00:39:19Yeah, we should know that.

00:39:22Girls getting changed in front of us.

00:39:24Yeah, yeah.

00:39:25Okay.

00:39:26Okay.

00:39:26They're actually yeah, there's some stuff.

00:39:28Fuck.

00:39:28I'm going to steal that.

00:39:31That's our thing now.

00:39:32Not having to go to church with your parents anymore.

00:39:34Yeah.

00:39:36Speaking, not speaking to your parents.

00:39:39Damn.

00:39:40Yeah, I think darty is worse.

00:39:41I think we can we would just build a straight guy.

00:39:45Oh, we got to be able to see boobs.

00:39:47Yeah, I think darty is worse.

00:39:49All right, darty is going to move on.

00:39:50Now we have the number two seat versus 15 seat second chain game.

00:39:53In the second chain game.

00:39:54We have a bracket of former Barstool employees.

00:39:58That's funny.

00:39:59That's great.

00:40:00Blackjack Fletcher.

00:40:01That's great for us.

00:40:03End of bracket.

00:40:04Blackjack Fletcher wins.

00:40:05We would have fun with it.

00:40:06That would be a blast.

00:40:07I thought I dreamt him.

00:40:09No, Jim Florentine was not a fever dream.

00:40:12There's a chance we still pay him.

00:40:13Florentine's great.

00:40:14The really Southern North Carolina kid who was a gambling, but he never did anything.

00:40:21Fuck.

00:40:22Who was that?

00:40:23He was in the Fletcher era.

00:40:24Is that the guy who could speak backwards?

00:40:26No, that was John Jennings or something.

00:40:29The kid who could speak backwards is funny.

00:40:32But see, this is just for us.

00:40:33It'd be great for anybody.

00:40:34I would love to do this just a night out with the boys.

00:40:39And that's the next option is the most average things from Will Greer season.

00:40:45Fascinating to think about.

00:40:46Oh, hell yeah.

00:40:47That was just like, I don't know what we would do.

00:40:49And if it would be boring.

00:40:50I like that.

00:40:50Bread.

00:40:51Blue jeans.

00:40:52Bread.

00:40:53White bread.

00:40:54A bus.

00:40:55Yeah, I think the jungle gym at the playground, because it's not the worst, but it's not the

00:41:02fucking swings.

00:41:04That's a porch step.

00:41:08Melon.

00:41:10Oh, yeah.

00:41:11I think honey is a little above.

00:41:13Above.

00:41:13Well, you're grabbing that in front of any other apples.

00:41:16Average.

00:41:18Apples.

00:41:19Apples.

00:41:19The fruit.

00:41:20Apples.

00:41:20Good.

00:41:22Orange is an average either.

00:41:23What do you think?

00:41:23Above or below?

00:41:24It gives a lovely juice.

00:41:26Above.

00:41:27I don't think the average goes to availability or abundance.

00:41:30Cantaloupe is average.

00:41:32Cantaloupe's probably average.

00:41:33Honeydew, I think is actually, I mean, it's good.

00:41:36Cantaloupe's good.

00:41:37I like cantaloupe too.

00:41:38I think cantaloupe is better than honeydew.

00:41:39You do like.

00:41:40Okay, this would be a good episode.

00:41:41Yeah.

00:41:42Adding it on.

00:41:43Bracket of disasters.

00:41:45Hurricane Katrina.

00:41:469-11.

00:41:46Mount Vesuvius.

00:41:49And the like from Fletcher Rau.

00:41:51Uh, all-time bad beats and gambling.

00:41:55Be miserable hearing that from us.

00:41:57Absolutely miserable hearing that from us.

00:41:59Oh my.

00:41:59That would suck so bad.

00:42:01That's so bad.

00:42:02That would suck so bad.

00:42:06Debate the top commentator call moments for cross-major sports.

00:42:10Granted, this would require audio from all moments to get the full effect, but I think

00:42:14going through all the great moments in sports history based on commentator calls would be

00:42:17cool.

00:42:18Again, the audio level of that would make that such a clunky thing.

00:42:21You know what I mean?

00:42:22We will see you tomorrow night.

00:42:24Like Randy Moss.

00:42:24Like Randy Moss mooning, like shit like that.

00:42:27And then lastly, things you wish you could smoke but you can't from Whorl.

00:42:31Ooh.

00:42:34We've done things you wish you can eat, which was a stretch.

00:42:38Things you wish you can smoke.

00:42:40No, that wasn't a stretch because the rightful poison dart frog won.

00:42:43That's true.

00:42:43Oh, what about lava?

00:42:45Did you guys say lava?

00:42:46Lava was on there, yeah.

00:42:48Windowsill was obviously on there.

00:42:49Things you wish you could smoke but can't.

00:42:51Bop it.

00:42:52I wish I could smoke a bop it.

00:42:54Poisonous dart frog wins again.

00:42:56Right.

00:42:57You want to smoke a bop it?

00:43:01No, that was an example.

00:43:05A shamrock shake, maybe.

00:43:06That would suck.

00:43:07Yeah, that would be not fun.

00:43:09Okay, so run through the options again.

00:43:10Farrell Barstow employees.

00:43:11It's worse gambling beats.

00:43:13I would agree it's worse gambling beats.

00:43:14Hearing that from us.

00:43:15That would be so boring.

00:43:16An hour.

00:43:17Good to vote on that as well.

00:43:18Yeah.

00:43:19Yeah, I bet Pat threw a line and they lost.

00:43:23When was that at?

00:43:24It was 2018.

00:43:24No, 17 because I was a freshman.

00:43:26No, I was a junior.

00:43:28I was at a darty with my boys.

00:43:32And the best part is all of us, since we're young enough, the bet would be like 20 bucks.

00:43:3715 to make 12.

00:43:41Okay, so the worst gambling beats is going up against the number two seed.

00:43:45Last matchup is types of porn from A.G.

00:43:48Lauderdale.

00:43:49There is no joke.

00:43:51When you go through the spreadsheet, like every fifth option is a porn.

00:43:54Like porn categories.

00:43:55Yeah, so there is porn categories.

00:43:57There's porn performers.

00:43:58There's like.

00:43:59No, I'm saying this one is.

00:44:00This one specifically.

00:44:01I just picked one of the first porn, which is we'll say porn categories.

00:44:05But hearing again for an hour from us on that would be very tough.

00:44:10So porn categories.

00:44:12Me and Tommy would be on a big tits crusade that whole time.

00:44:16One seed would be Asian, so it would be way.

00:44:18And that would be going up against the.

00:44:20So get porn scoring up against gambling bad beats.

00:44:22Start with you, Tommy.

00:44:25This is this is a championship level matchup right here.

00:44:28Yeah, I do think at least with the gambling bad beats, there's some people out there who

00:44:33would like that.

00:44:34The people who would like the porn matchup are sick fucking freaks that would listen

00:44:39to us talk about that for an hour and a half.

00:44:41So I'll say the porn is worse.

00:44:43Porn is worse.

00:44:43I would agree with you.

00:44:44That'd be tough one.

00:44:46I agree.

00:44:47Again, it's just from us debating like, yeah, Ebony versus Latino would be.

00:44:52No good, Nick.

00:44:56I mean.

00:44:59Yeah, that would be so bad.

00:45:00But the gambling beats who gives a fuck?

00:45:02I guess some of Portnoy's were.

00:45:06Like, you'd rather hear one of our stories about a bad gambling beat than a great jerk.

00:45:12Oh, yeah.

00:45:12Like, yeah, dude, some of my best solo busts have come from POV.

00:45:18Yeah, that would be the worst podcast ever.

00:45:21Ever porn and over.

00:45:23No, I'm so no, no, no.

00:45:24I'm still going gambling beats because I still think who I can't imagine who would care.

00:45:29I agree.

00:45:30So we're now we're four and you're going for porn.

00:45:33Yeah, yeah.

00:45:35Yeah, I guess.

00:45:36What's KB's number one category?

00:45:40I don't like your tone.

00:45:43He puts his hand underneath his pants.

00:45:45What's KB's number one?

00:45:48No, no, not.

00:45:51It's like I want to answer.

00:45:55Just say it fast.

00:45:58I could go for it now.

00:45:59Yeah, fast.

00:46:01Like so people would have to slow it down.

00:46:03No, because it would be a long winded like I had to break it down.

00:46:06There's a different.

00:46:06Oh, yeah, what?

00:46:09There's no it's not like one.

00:46:12Oh, there's a few different.

00:46:13Yeah, multiple words.

00:46:15The genre you like is a full sentence.

00:46:17That's all you need to say it now.

00:46:19I need to say it.

00:46:20I was just joking.

00:46:22No, I'm saying there's no clear cut winner.

00:46:24Oh, there's different elements.

00:46:28OK, Rudy, this is tough because they're both so bad.

00:46:32Yeah.

00:46:32But I think that you could make the porn one funny.

00:46:36I don't know how you make the beat one funny.

00:46:40So I guess the beats is worse, in my opinion.

00:46:43Which beats we talking about?

00:46:44Yeah.

00:46:45Sorry.

00:46:47So porn is going to win by a vote.

00:46:49So porn categories.

00:46:52That is just it's a brutal one.

00:46:54Before we get to the playoffs, let's hear from Rocket Money.

00:46:57Did you find any subscriptions that he forgot about or any that he paid for twice and didn't

00:47:00realize it?

00:47:01I was mentioned with Rocket Money.

00:47:02It was paying, I think it was $16.85 to Microsoft.

00:47:05Didn't know what it was for like three years.

00:47:07Finally figured it out through Rocket Money, and they canceled it for me.

00:47:10Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions,

00:47:13monitors your spending, helps lower your bills so that you can grow your savings.

00:47:16With Rocket Money, you can have full control of your subscriptions, a clear view of your

00:47:19expenses.

00:47:20You can see all your subscriptions in one place.

00:47:21And if you see something you don't want, Rocket Money can help you get rid of it with just

00:47:23a few taps.

00:47:25It's great out there.

00:47:25Dashboard shows your month's spending compared to last month's.

00:47:27You can clearly see your spending habits.

00:47:28Plus, they'll help you create a custom budget and keep your spending on track.

00:47:32They'll even negotiate lower bills for you by up to 20%.

00:47:34All you have to do is submit a picture of your bill, and Rocket Money takes care of

00:47:36the rest.

00:47:37They have over 5 million users and have saved those users over $500 million and canceled

00:47:41subscriptions, saving them up to $140 a year when using all the app's features.

00:47:45So stop wasting money on things you don't use.

00:47:47Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash lights.

00:47:50That's rocketmoney.com slash lights, rocketmoney.com slash lights.

00:47:54Playoffs.

00:47:55What would you want to hear this group debate about least, or which would be worse?

00:48:00Weed strains or best place to have sex?

00:48:04Best weed strains or best place to have sex?

00:48:05What would you want to hear less from us?

00:48:07Rudy.

00:48:10Fuck.

00:48:11This is going to get really rough from here on out.

00:48:14I think that the weed strains one is just so remarkably bad.

00:48:19It's jaw-droppingly bad because we're going to debate lamb's breath versus chromatic.

00:48:26I've never, I wouldn't even know.

00:48:28Yeah, I mean, weed strains are just made up for the most part.

00:48:33You're going to get attacked for that.

00:48:36I know.

00:48:36No, it was just like, it's true.

00:48:38It is.

00:48:38No research that shows the difference in, maybe there is.

00:48:43There probably is, but we're not the guys.

00:48:45We're not the guys.

00:48:46We're not the guys.

00:48:46That's the thing.

00:48:47Those guys exist.

00:48:48Go do that podcast.

00:48:50Your fan will go crazy.

00:48:54It's got to be best places to have sex.

00:48:57Is worse?

00:48:58No, it's better.

00:48:59So the weed one is worse.

00:49:01The weed is worse.

00:49:01That always fucks me up.

00:49:02Yeah.

00:49:03The weed one's worse.

00:49:03KB?

00:49:04Yeah.

00:49:04The sex surfaces is horrible, but talking sex with the boys could open up some laughs.

00:49:11It's one of God's great gifts.

00:49:13Hearing experiences from you guys.

00:49:15Yeah.

00:49:16Yeah.

00:49:17Yeah.

00:49:17You want to hear our sex experiences.

00:49:19You look at us and you're just like, they got some tales to tell you.

00:49:21That'll be.

00:49:22These guys have had some crazy sex.

00:49:24Yeah.

00:49:24I'm sick of hearing Matt Reif talk about sex.

00:49:26I want to hear these guys.

00:49:28Yeah.

00:49:29Imagine having sex on one of those rugs.

00:49:30That was also like a town in an elementary school classroom.

00:49:34That would be cool.

00:49:36That would be cool.

00:49:37A 2D image of Cincinnati.

00:49:38Yeah.

00:49:40Dude, I think our bracket with the best places to have sex would just be the different sizes of bed.

00:49:46Quint bed.

00:49:47That would go hard.

00:49:48King is too big.

00:49:50California versus King.

00:49:52Dorm bed underrated.

00:49:55Why?

00:49:55Top or bottom bunk?

00:49:57Why is it?

00:49:58Yeah.

00:49:58Why?

00:49:59Because I was a good.

00:50:00Dorm bed right now.

00:50:01No.

00:50:02Yeah.

00:50:02No.

00:50:02Yeah.

00:50:03Tommy.

00:50:03No.

00:50:04Tommy.

00:50:05It's been a while.

00:50:06It's been at least a while.

00:50:08Uh, yeah, I feel like there could be a few laughs in that.

00:50:13Nobody wants to hear about.

00:50:14We other week strains.

00:50:16So fucking bad.

00:50:17So fucking bad.

00:50:18Weed strains is the worst.

00:50:20That I would rather hear us talk about the different types of drill bits.

00:50:23Oh, yeah.

00:50:25Oh, my God.

00:50:27I don't know.

00:50:27Is it any of these?

00:50:28Uh, uh, we'd.

00:50:30Yeah, we just don't know anything about.

00:50:31I don't know anyone even at the company that I would trust to speak more than two seconds

00:50:35about.

00:50:35And anybody that would, I wouldn't want to hear it.

00:50:37Correct.

00:50:38Uh, Tommy.

00:50:39So, yeah, we, we just.

00:50:41Weed is going to be tough to beat.

00:50:42It's the winner.

00:50:43It's going to be really tough to beat.

00:50:45Uh, next up we have best Dorito.

00:50:47Oh, it's this best best European country to live in.

00:50:52Wait a second.

00:50:52I forgot about that.

00:50:53If that guy keeps like it, has he submitted that more than once?

00:50:57Like, come on, like three or four times.

00:50:59Not joking.

00:51:00Not joking.

00:51:01Best Dorito.

00:51:02European country.

00:51:02And at least, I mean, I probably been to as many European or I haven't really.

00:51:08I've been to, I guess, two European countries.

00:51:09I've had three probably flavors of Doritos, but I still think the Doritos one is worse.

00:51:15Yeah.

00:51:16That's such a weird comparison.

00:51:17How many you've been to more European flavors tried.

00:51:20Yeah.

00:51:21Uh, I think I'll do a three to two just against the lack of flavors, but the lack of experience

00:51:26in Europe and the lack of experience in the US.

00:51:29Lack of flavors.

00:51:30But the lack of experience in European countries is maybe tough as well.

00:51:34Oh, and Dorito is worse.

00:51:36I've had two kinds.

00:51:38Neither for me.

00:51:38Neither for you.

00:51:39Don't even like Doritos.

00:51:40No, not particularly.

00:51:41I don't dislike them.

00:51:42But, uh, Nick.

00:51:44Cool Ranch Doritos rule.

00:51:46Those are, those are tasty ass snacks.

00:51:51Oh man.

00:51:52But like, I just don't know how you talk about it.

00:51:55Just like this one tastes better.

00:51:56I'm voting for that one.

00:51:58So I'm going with best Dorito.

00:52:02Mook said to check your phone, by the way.

00:52:04Okay.

00:52:05Uh, KB.

00:52:07Yeah.

00:52:07The Europe one is fine.

00:52:08There's a lot of depth and parody.

00:52:10There's a lot of good quality places to live in Europe, but the Dorito one.

00:52:16The final four might get a little fiery.

00:52:19I'd go for the, I'd go for the purple bag and then, uh, yeah, those are good.

00:52:24I still like Cool Ranch more.

00:52:25They used to do a bag where it was half blue cheese, half chicken wing.

00:52:28Do you remember that?

00:52:30No chip.

00:52:33Oh my God.

00:52:34That sounds bad.

00:52:35Was each chip half of each or half?

00:52:37No, it was like half of them were like 20 were one and 20 were the other.

00:52:40Yeah, exactly.

00:52:42Uh, so another one for the Doritos.

00:52:44Ready?

00:52:46Yeah.

00:52:46It's Doritos.

00:52:46You can't even fill out the bracket.

00:52:48We can at least play off our ignorance for the year.

00:52:50We can have actually, they sell just plain Doritos in Europe.

00:52:53Like no, at least more than here.

00:52:55Yeah.

00:52:56It's like a tortilla chip.

00:52:57Yeah.

00:52:58Corn chip.

00:52:58Okay.

00:52:59Uh, okay.

00:53:00So Dorito versus, uh, weed strange to go into the finals.

00:53:04Starting with you, Rudy.

00:53:06Jesus Christ.

00:53:09Um.

00:53:15Oh my God.

00:53:16It's gotta be.

00:53:17From us, it has so bad.

00:53:19I mean, the only thing is that there are more weed strains and then like you can look up

00:53:24like funny names, like there's like a hundred, there's limitless.

00:53:28I don't know.

00:53:30And it's all stuff that sounds like an apocalypse, like.

00:53:33Yeah.

00:53:34Obamacare, like that shit will get you fucked up.

00:53:36Yeah.

00:53:37Like, so I guess if we got super baked and tried to make the worst podcast ever,

00:53:43weed strains might be better.

00:53:45Doritos has is, this is so bad.

00:53:48I guess Doritos.

00:53:50There's no way.

00:53:51I guess.

00:53:52I don't know.

00:53:52Doritos is worse.

00:53:54Just trying to look up some strains.

00:53:55They're all.

00:53:55Yeah.

00:53:55They're all pretty Bob Saget.

00:53:57OG.

00:53:59The names would be fun, right?

00:54:01But the effects would be, uh.

00:54:03Purple or purple.

00:54:04Oracle.

00:54:04I think I've heard before.

00:54:05I think that's one that.

00:54:07I don't know.

00:54:07That's I don't know anything about it.

00:54:08See, that's, that's exactly why it should suck.

00:54:10Uh, KB.

00:54:13White penis envy.

00:54:14I got lumped.

00:54:18Is that the envy?

00:54:19White penises has towards black penises.

00:54:22I, I will show you a picture of it.

00:54:24I'm not sure.

00:54:26Yeah, it's just me.

00:54:27Yeah, I think it's envy for white penises, which is pretty rare in America.

00:54:31Oh, albino penis envy.

00:54:33Oh, uh, so KB, will you go for weed as well?

00:54:41Weed is a little bit worse.

00:54:43Grandpa's breath.

00:54:44That's no, I don't want to smoke that.

00:54:47I've heard, I've heard that before.

00:54:49I don't want to smoke that at all.

00:54:51I mean, we could do a bracket just off the name.

00:54:53Names would be funny.

00:54:53That would be funny.

00:54:54Shit.

00:54:54I forgot.

00:54:55Yeah, yeah.

00:54:58It's really funny.

00:54:58Uh, sorry, Nick.

00:55:03Weed strains.

00:55:04Still worse than Doritos, dude.

00:55:07Uh, I just like, how, how would we fill the Dorito bracket?

00:55:13What are the 16 Doritos?

00:55:15But we could get to absurd flavor.

00:55:17I mean, we're basically just arguing absurd flavors versus absurd names.

00:55:19I mean, it would have, it would have to go down.

00:55:21Can we do like a trial of how that would go?

00:55:24Crunch.

00:55:24A trial podcast of weed?

00:55:26Can we do one round of like, what would a chili lime versus garlic salt sound like here?

00:55:34You're right.

00:55:34No idea.

00:55:36Uh, three for weed.

00:55:39I think Doritos is worse.

00:55:40I'm switching to Doritos.

00:55:41Doritos, you're right.

00:55:42It's too shallow.

00:55:43It's nothing to say.

00:55:45Yeah.

00:55:45And there's not 16 flavors.

00:55:47Yeah.

00:55:47So we're gonna, we have a little bit of swap over now.

00:55:49We have three for Doritos, one for weed.

00:55:51We should FaceTime the guy who submitted the Doritos.

00:55:56We should just do a 15 minute episode just for him and send it to him.

00:56:01He can't release it.

00:56:02Yeah.

00:56:03Here, man, just leave us alone.

00:56:05Stop.

00:56:06Uh, I think based off of all this, I, I still, I think just based off that little tiny blip

00:56:11where we had a little bit of fun making fun of the names, that was more fun than anything

00:56:15I think we could possibly do with Doritos.

00:56:17So I think I will go with Doritos being worse.

00:56:22I, yeah, I'll go Doritos.

00:56:23It's tough, but at least the weed one could be funnier.

00:56:27Yeah.

00:56:27If we went stoner mode.

00:56:29Only if we go SM.

00:56:30Only if we went full stoner mode.

00:56:32Yeah.

00:56:33Uh, so Doritos is going to the finals.

00:56:35Uh, next up, let's talk about Babbel before we get to the other side of the playoffs.

00:56:38Be a better you in 2024.

00:56:40Thank God Stephen Chayes is not here.

00:56:41Uh, be a better you in 2024 with Babbel, the science-backed language learning app that

00:56:45actually works.

00:56:45Don't pay hundreds of dollars for private tutors or waste hours on apps that don't actually

00:56:48help you speak the language.

00:56:50Babbel's quick 10-minute lessons are handcrafted by over 200 language experts to help you start

00:56:53speaking a new language in as little as three weeks.

00:56:55They're designed by real people for real conversations.

00:56:57Babbel's tips and tools are approachable, accessible, rooted in real-life situations,

00:57:00and delivered with conversation-based teaching so that you're ready to practice what you've

00:57:03learned in the real world.

00:57:04I get, I think I mentioned the last time I did Babbel too, but using them to help learn

00:57:07Spanish.

00:57:08Uh, studies from Yale, Michigan State University, and others continue to show that Babbel is

00:57:12better.

00:57:13One study found that using it for 15 hours is the equivalent of a full semester in college.

00:57:16They have over 16 million subscriptions sold, plus all of their 14 award-winning language

00:57:20courses are backed by their 20-day money-back guarantee.

00:57:23Here's a special limited time deal for our listeners.

00:57:26Right now, get 60% off your Babbel subscription, but only for our listeners at babbel.com slash

00:57:30lights.

00:57:31That's 60% off at babbel.com slash lights, both B-A-B-B-E-L.com slash lights.

00:57:37Rules and restrictions apply.

00:57:39Uh, other side of the bracket.

00:57:40Oh God, I forgot about this one and it's so bad.

00:57:43Uh, what's the worst survivable pain someone can experience, emotional or physical, versus

00:57:48the number six seed.

00:57:49Uh, best place, top places to be from that make people think you're kind of trashy, parentheses,

00:57:54not horrible, like Flint or Wheeling.

00:57:56Wait, that won?

00:57:57That did win, yeah.

00:57:58Oh, I thought that lost.

00:57:59We did talk about how we liked that a little bit, but it lost to, um.

00:58:02Oh, because the president's one was actually, got it.

00:58:04Um, uh, not as bad as Flint or Wheeling, but say Myrtle Beach or Panama City.

00:58:09So the places versus the pain.

00:58:11Uh, let's start with you, Rudy.

00:58:14The pain.

00:58:16That would be the most depressing podcast ever put out.

00:58:20Uh, it's the pain.

00:58:21Places we could make, we could make something out of that.

00:58:25Yeah.

00:58:26But the pain one would just be remarkably depressing.

00:58:30One for pain, KB.

00:58:32Yeah, yeah, it's pain, but I would watch like a scientific video on that.

00:58:35Yeah, he just does.

00:58:36I wouldn't, man.

00:58:39That's my shit, yeah.

00:58:41No, that's just, there's, I don't, I don't see any good in that.

00:58:43So I'm going with the pain.

00:58:45Yeah, pain.

00:58:45Another one for pain.

00:58:46Another one for pain.

00:58:47I'd do pain as well.

00:58:48Pain, yes.

00:58:50Pain moving on.

00:58:51Next matchup is the number two seed porn categories versus the seven seed Daugherty Attire.

00:58:57Oh, what would you, for our group, this group of people, what would you rather hear?

00:59:02What do you think would be the worst podcast?

00:59:04It's gotta be the porn.

00:59:05Porn categories or Daugherty Attire.

00:59:07I don't want to hear what you guys are like stroking it to.

00:59:09The Daugherty Attire, I do think we can make funny.

00:59:12Yeah.

00:59:12I don't think there's any world where the porn one is funny.

00:59:15We're debating like, because like we'd be debating porn,

00:59:18specifically in this example, porn categories too.

00:59:20It'd be brutal.

00:59:22Yeah, that's worse.

00:59:23Yeah.

00:59:24Yeah, we'd be in the trenches.

00:59:26Yeah, you'd be YouTube.

00:59:27Yeah.

00:59:27Just voting on blonde big tit every single week.

00:59:29Yeah, then you don't want to like be too, you don't want to be too vocal about your side.

00:59:33And then it's weird.

00:59:35Yeah.

00:59:36Yeah.

00:59:36So two for porn.

00:59:39Oh, and go for porn as well.

00:59:41Nick?

00:59:42Yeah, porn.

00:59:43Seems like it's a very clean sweep, KB.

00:59:45Yeah, porn.

00:59:46Porn, Rudy.

00:59:50It's porn.

00:59:51It's porn, but I will say the Daugherty one would have been, it'd be brutal.

00:59:56We could try to make funny.

00:59:56If we did it sarcastically.

00:59:57I mean, it would just be Saturdays are for the boys.

00:59:59Tank wins, white cuddle.

01:00:00We could do it sarcastically.

01:00:01Otherwise you could say that about any one of these ones.

01:00:03So I think we'd have to be discussing it earnestly.

01:00:04Right, right.

01:00:05Which would make it so bad.

01:00:07Uh, so porn category is going to move on versus the unimaginable pain.

01:00:12What's the worst pain someone can experience versus forced category?

01:00:16That's fascinating as hell.

01:00:17I would like to know.

01:00:18Yeah.

01:00:18Unimaginable pain is starting to grow on me a little bit.

01:00:22So, uh, wait, we should combine these two into one bracket so we can have milk versus

01:00:27losing a child.

01:00:30Jesus Christ.

01:00:31So porn categories versus the worst pain someone can experience.

01:00:35Uh, let's start with you, Rudy.

01:00:39I don't know how to grade this.

01:00:41I don't, I don't know how to pick this.

01:00:43I mean, I guess the porn would be worse.

01:00:53I think I don't know.

01:00:54I was talking about art.

01:00:55What we think is it would be so sad talking about pain.

01:00:59Like I'd be way more uncomfortable talking about porn.

01:01:03Like, uh, rabies.

01:01:04Like, yeah, like fun readup.

01:01:06You know, what's sad is, is, is six dudes on a podcast talking about their favorite porn

01:01:11category.

01:01:14But honestly, not talking about it, debating which is better.

01:01:16Oh, I didn't think about that.

01:01:19Arguing passionately for their sides.

01:01:22Going to war for POV.

01:01:24Like, that's so fucking sad.

01:01:26I, I, I think porn is worse.

01:01:29But like porn is, porn is much worse.

01:01:30I think there's more in my brain as far as like a listening experience.

01:01:34Right.

01:01:34It would be more fun because we'd be like, if like, if we'd be passionately debating

01:01:38for whatever, like you could be clowning on each other.

01:01:41So like that, that could be funny.

01:01:43I don't see any world in any, we're not being like, oh, you, you think getting molested

01:01:48is worse than that?

01:01:49Like, it's just no way that that turns into anything funny.

01:01:51So like, it's just dour versus something that could be funny.

01:01:54At least that's the way I'm trying to think about it.

01:01:56I can't picture porn being funny though.

01:01:59Like if at all, I could picture the other thing being funny.

01:02:05About pain.

01:02:06Yeah.

01:02:06And that's like what a lot of comedy is.

01:02:09Yeah.

01:02:10So one for the porn, KB.

01:02:13Yeah.

01:02:13Porn.

01:02:14Yeah.

01:02:14Porn.

01:02:15I like the other one.

01:02:16Do you remember the one porn category I sent, I sent you guys?

01:02:19It was.

01:02:22You're trying to make this a porn podcast.

01:02:25Trying to just do it.

01:02:26There's an account I found on TikTok that does vore porn.

01:02:30Where it's like, yeah, eat stuff.

01:02:33It's like they get turned on by the image of something eating something else.

01:02:41Yeah, that too.

01:02:42And it'd be like, that's the gigantism.

01:02:43And then the other one was like, it was the videos were like furries eating another furry.

01:02:47And then the furry.

01:02:47That's funny though.

01:02:48Like debating best porn is.

01:02:51I don't even find that you're into something like that.

01:02:54Watching enough TikTok.

01:02:56It's a rabbit.

01:02:58I don't know.

01:03:04I'm going porn.

01:03:05It'd be your neighbor.

01:03:05I agree on porn.

01:03:07Porn.

01:03:07I'd do porn as well.

01:03:08But pain would be.

01:03:09I think I would have went pain, but it's a loser.

01:03:12Porn is going to move on.

01:03:14Porn categories.

01:03:14Wow.

01:03:14The number one versus the number two seat.

01:03:16I did not expect that based off the beginning of how we went on this.

01:03:18Pretty good.

01:03:19Very, pretty chalky.

01:03:20And then last ad of the day.

01:03:22Shout out to our boys over at Body Armor.

01:03:23Go check them out right there.

01:03:24You guys just did a bunch of stuff with Body Armor yesterday.

01:03:26Oh yeah.

01:03:27You see Body Armor Zero Sugar right here.

01:03:28This episode is brought to you by Body Armor Zero Sugar.

01:03:31Brand new Zero Sugar sports drinks from our friends over at Body Armor.

01:03:33Provides real hydration with no artificial sweeteners, flavors, or dyes.

01:03:36Whether you're looking to stay hydrated or recovering from a long weekend,

01:03:38Body Armor Zero Sugar has you covered.

01:03:40Great tasting flavors like Fruit Punch Lemon Lime.

01:03:42Say it with every Body Armor Zero Sugar ad.

01:03:44I don't know how they crack the code of Lemon Lime.

01:03:46Never been a fan of the flavor.

01:03:47Really like it with theirs.

01:03:49And you can see Body Armor.

01:03:50Nick's got one right in front of him.

01:03:51Rudy's got like 10 next to him.

01:03:53KB.

01:03:53Tommy has one in his ass.

01:03:55Yep.

01:03:56Yeah, exactly.

01:03:57He's got it heading up from right now.

01:03:58I always have a Body Armor in my ass.

01:04:00Stay hydrated.

01:04:01Lenny literally hoards it in this office.

01:04:03Like anytime we get like a shipment of it, he just takes eight.

01:04:06He takes eight of them, brings them to his dad's mom's house.

01:04:11Wouldn't he want them cold?

01:04:12Dude, the funniest thing is how we were like,

01:04:14dude, you can't just hoard the Body Armor.

01:04:15And he's like, but I'm gonna drink it.

01:04:18Yeah, we know.

01:04:19You're just hoarding it though.

01:04:21It's so fucking funny.

01:04:22But yeah, so the shout out to Body Armor.

01:04:24We love those guys over there.

01:04:25Body Armor is available in stores nationwide.

01:04:27Head on over to Walmart and get yours today.

01:04:29Shout out to Body Armor.

01:04:30All right, finals.

01:04:31Which would make for a worse show?

01:04:34A podcast about what the best Dorito is versus a podcast about what the best porn category is.

01:04:41Oh my God.

01:04:42Tommy Smokes, you're up first.

01:04:45This is a battle of the titans.

01:04:46I mean, if we can find random Dorito flavors that were like special releases,

01:04:52it'd be tough considering we never ate them.

01:04:56But I still think I'd rather hear us talk about chips we've never eaten

01:05:02than porn that we've jerked off to.

01:05:03So I'll say the porn is worse, but it's a tough battle.

01:05:06I think the porn would be worse too.

01:05:08Again, mostly because this would be like,

01:05:10I forget which one of you, most of you were off this one.

01:05:13We did the sitcom one where I had to be like,

01:05:15we did the sitcom one where I had a very late sub in Eddie

01:05:18and the Chicago crew and they just hadn't watched sitcoms.

01:05:21And they were just like, yeah, so what do you think is better?

01:05:23Like Seinfeld or this?

01:05:24And they're like, don't know what you're even talking about right now.

01:05:26It's like that would be us with these Dorito flavors, which would be brutal.

01:05:30We can imagine what it tastes like.

01:05:32Take a guess, Owen.

01:05:36Yeah, I don't know.

01:05:38I think maybe it could be funny how nonsensical the Dorito one is,

01:05:44because I really can't picture a single string of sentences about it.

01:05:49But I'd prefer to hear what we would try to do with that than the porn.

01:05:53The porn.

01:05:53So yeah, I'll say the porn's worse.

01:05:57Three for the porn, Nick?

01:06:00Porn, easily.

01:06:02Doritos, you have the ridiculousness of it.

01:06:04The graphic would be funny.

01:06:07Just seeing it, yeah, I don't want to, yeah, it'll be bad.

01:06:11The graphic of porn categories would be very, they wouldn't post it.

01:06:13Maybe Doritos, yeah, it's just like three teams and they each get a bunch of buys.

01:06:19Three-team tournament.

01:06:21Round robin.

01:06:23I think Doritos is worse.

01:06:25You think Doritos is worse?

01:06:28Porn is like, it's disgusting, it's cringey, it's corny,

01:06:33but it opens up for a lot of conversation.

01:06:37Doritos, there'd be nothing.

01:06:40I'm fascinated by it, so I kind of want to try it.

01:06:45This one has a slight hint of whatever it tastes.

01:06:50Ruby's standing up over his hint of lime.

01:06:53Exactly, yeah.

01:06:55Should we get 16 different Dorito flavors and try them?

01:06:58We might have to do a Dorito.

01:06:59No, we could fantasy football punishment, maybe.

01:07:02Make a 10-part documentary about Doritos.

01:07:06Yeah.

01:07:07On camera's Netflix quality, so we could submit for festivals.

01:07:10You're not allowed to go into the history.

01:07:12You only are allowed to talk about the flavors.

01:07:14Flavor pellets.

01:07:15You can talk about the taste.

01:07:17You can talk about taste or flavor, but that's it.

01:07:20No fillers.

01:07:20You can't do anything about anyone else.

01:07:23Rudy?

01:07:25I just...

01:07:26Part one is taste and part two is flavor.

01:07:28Part three is more thought.

01:07:40Rudy?

01:07:41I just don't know, man.

01:07:42I mean, you could make the argument for both, I guess, that guys debating porn categories

01:07:50could be funny in a cringey way.

01:07:53I just can't do it.

01:07:55I just can't.

01:07:56Porn is worse.

01:07:58Porn is worse.

01:07:59Okay, so porn is going to win the bracket episode 126.

01:08:02We do have some funny honorable mentions.

01:08:05First being best pranks, April 1st from Travis.

01:08:10Don't know what we do.

01:08:11Classic Travis.

01:08:1216 pranks.

01:08:15I mean, the best prank is pantsing somebody.

01:08:17Oh, yeah.

01:08:18Mailboxing.

01:08:19Or Lee Harvey.

01:08:20I mean, no, we actually debated something similar to this, but I think we said Atomic

01:08:23Wedgie was the worst.

01:08:24Yeah.

01:08:24That's not really a prank.

01:08:25That's so much like harassing.

01:08:26That's a prank.

01:08:27Flagpole Wedgie.

01:08:28Flagpole Wedgie.

01:08:29Yeah, true.

01:08:30I'd rather get that than pants.

01:08:33Yeah.

01:08:34Surprise penis is the smallest.

01:08:36Yeah.

01:08:37You want to hear a horror story?

01:08:38Yes.

01:08:39I got pants when I was hanging on the.

01:08:41That is.

01:08:42Oh, monkey bars.

01:08:43Yeah.

01:08:43Oh, man.

01:08:44Nightmare.

01:08:45Like I was fucking Jesus.

01:08:47Yeah.

01:08:47The penis dilates like your pupils in the sun.

01:08:50Yep.

01:08:50Yeah.

01:08:51Yeah.

01:08:52The public.

01:08:53Don't look it in the eye.

01:08:54One of the worst days of my life.

01:08:56I got pants right before I went on one of those dangling roller coasters.

01:09:01That'd be the worst thing that could happen.

01:09:03Or the ones with the swings.

01:09:05Yeah, like the Batman in Six Flags.

01:09:08Yeah, just the legs dangling.

01:09:15I got the.

01:09:16I got the.

01:09:16And the Gravitron just fucking twirling it.

01:09:19Yeah, just.

01:09:21It's the Gravitron.

01:09:23Are you kidding me?

01:09:24That would be a good bracket.

01:09:25Worst rides to get pants.

01:09:27Worst places to be pants.

01:09:28Yeah.

01:09:29The Gravitron.

01:09:31The Gravitron, dude.

01:09:32Uh, no.

01:09:33T-Cap ride, because then you're going to jail.

01:09:35That's that's that's.

01:09:36Oh, yeah.

01:09:36There it is.

01:09:37The dangling would still be the funniest.

01:09:39The dangling is a little bad.

01:09:40Yeah.

01:09:40Your legs just like swinging in the wind.

01:09:42Swinging in the wind when the loop comes.

01:09:45House of mirrors.

01:09:47Oh, yeah.

01:09:48It's everywhere you turn.

01:09:50Uh, most.

01:09:51Getting head on the Tower of Terror.

01:09:53Well, that would be awesome.

01:09:55Most most fuckable animals from Gene.

01:09:58You know, Gene.

01:10:00No, dude, that might be worse than the porn categories.

01:10:03There was somewhere.

01:10:03Yeah, that's for, uh, worst or slash best places to be tall from Sloptimus Prime.

01:10:11Worst place to be tall.

01:10:13A doorway at a short convention in a in a short competition.

01:10:20Yeah, Chalky School.

01:10:22Oh, why did I think I could win this?

01:10:29Uh, you know, it's like five other porn star categories.

01:10:32Car brands and manufacturers could not from us again just would be brutal.

01:10:36Don't care.

01:10:36Yeah, that's so bad.

01:10:39That sucks.

01:10:40Best way to cook a potato from Troy to go.

01:10:42That's not bad.

01:10:45People you'd most want to give a wedgie to.

01:10:47I think I just starred that for later.

01:10:50Best way to blow through $100, $100,000,000 in the parentheses.

01:10:53Put hookers, blow and knives from Canoe John.

01:10:58Canoe John.

01:10:59I don't think that's the best way to blow through it.

01:11:00$100,000,000 of knives has to be most.

01:11:02That's so every night.

01:11:04Yeah, every night.

01:11:07Go, Cory G from Milwaukee.

01:11:10Canoe John.

01:11:11Canoe John.

01:11:12He bought every night.

01:11:16Next celebrity to get canceled.

01:11:18I think they meant like a bracket of like the most likely celebrities to get canceled.

01:11:21Well, like, yeah, I don't know how fun that would be.

01:11:24Celebrities you wish were your mom from Laurel.

01:11:27That one sounds.

01:11:27Oh, I hate that one.

01:11:28Yeah, that's creepy.

01:11:29Weird on Detroit.

01:11:30Said a mouthful about him.

01:11:31I would disrespect my mom like that.

01:11:33Yeah, same.

01:11:34Seafood dinner.

01:11:35Some guy dispense fit fridges, but I don't know what that means.

01:11:38Not even though it's just seafood dinner.

01:11:42Yeah, they were doing seafood dinner.

01:11:45That's the only submission.

01:11:46I'm going to take seafood dinner on this one.

01:11:50What would the winner be?

01:11:50Just counterpoint.

01:11:51Yeah, winner be seafood dinner.

01:11:53To play devil's advocate.

01:11:54Have you guys considered seafood dinner?

01:11:56Fuck, man.

01:11:59Who is the best salesperson of all time from Josh Kelly?

01:12:03What?

01:12:04God.

01:12:05Oh, my God.

01:12:09That is so bad.

01:12:11Biggest pussy from Matt Butler.

01:12:15I like that one.

01:12:16That would be amazing research.

01:12:21Biggest thing from just call me must be pretty fucking good.

01:12:26Pretty good.

01:12:27And maybe left area codes from KB on my knob was the username.

01:12:34Not me.

01:12:35That's horrible.

01:12:36That's so bad.

01:12:37Why would I just as you're debating?

01:12:39What?

01:12:40But that was the last of the ones I had in the list.

01:12:43Sucks.

01:12:44Which one?

01:12:45Which one do we think was actually the best one?

01:12:48I think there's some good ones.

01:12:49A lot of good presidents.

01:12:51And profile.

01:12:52Yeah.

01:12:52Profile.

01:12:53Yeah.

01:12:53So that wasn't a minute.

01:12:55You kind of switched around with the Yu-Gi-Oh character on acid.

01:12:59The Yu-Gi-Oh monster you'd want to trip with.

01:13:02If people want it, I will build that for next week.

01:13:05That would be really fun.

01:13:07Adjectives was on there as well.

01:13:10Yeah, bad.

01:13:12I thought it was good until good ones came along.

01:13:15Animated character you'd want to be your barber.

01:13:18Oh, yeah.

01:13:19That was the one they gave us.

01:13:20That one we got the ad on too.

01:13:21I think we definitely do the Yu-Gi-Oh one though.

01:13:23Okay, but that's the episode 126.

01:13:24This was almost like a planning episode more than anything else.

01:13:29I liked it.

01:13:29I think we found some good options.

01:13:30Keep submitting, people.

01:13:31Keep on submitting.

01:13:32Yeah.

01:13:33Maybe you'll end up on one.

01:13:34Not some of you.

01:13:36Don't be talking about why you want to fuck animals.

01:13:38And then dropping your ad in that same submission.

01:13:41That same guy's not going to learn his lesson.

01:13:43He's going to submit worse Dorito flavors.

01:13:49Best place to enjoy.

01:13:53Best corn chip, the Mazza bread.

01:13:56But yeah, but we shared it back next week.

01:13:58We'll do one of these categories.

01:13:59See you guys next time.

01:14:00Love you.

01:14:01Can you do a clap real quick?

01:14:02What?

01:14:03Can you just do a clap real quick?

01:14:04Oh, yeah.

01:14:06Was that bad?

01:14:07I didn't hear that at all.

01:14:11Those hands are on mute.

01:14:14Oh, this is embarrassing as fuck.

01:14:16All right, one more time.

01:14:16Three, two, one.

01:14:19Oh my God.

01:14:19You have muted hands.

01:14:21Does that make a sound?

01:14:22Does it make a sound when I do it?

01:14:25Clap.

01:14:27No.

01:14:28Weird.

01:14:29No, I can't hear.

01:14:31What the fuck?

01:14:33Yo, it sounds like nothing.

01:14:34That's crazy.

01:14:37Aren't claps silent?

01:14:38I can't hear it.

01:14:39That's great.

01:14:39How does that work?

01:14:40Claps can't be picked up by microphones?

Category

Transcript

Recommended