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00:00Sous-titres faits par la communauté d'Amara.org
00:30horse-beating factory, eating raisins from America's cookies.
00:33Kids on the beat, kids on the street, beat kids, beat kids.
00:39Good to see some of you back again, and some newbies.
00:42We're going to jump right into the evaluation process.
00:44We are going to be evaluating an episode of A Wonder Chosen.
00:48Strap yourself in for some sweet mind-fudging.
00:54Last time Horse Apples was about seven minutes.
00:57This episode of A Wonder Chosen is twenty-two.
01:01So it's going to be a while while you're actually going to be watching.
01:04Kids show, kids show, change the channel.
01:13Today's Wonder Chosen is brought to you by Knowledge, Middle America, and One Thing of Colon.
01:21These guys look like they're watching their own colonoscopy.
01:26Positive.
01:38They're like the proud noble savages of TV.
01:56Racist? Heck, I've leached some of my best friends.
02:02Hey, it's me, Little Slugger, and the Ballet of the Beast.
02:05We're in their test marketing some kind of TV show.
02:08Let's see what the common man thinks.
02:10The cold eyes of America staring into the cold eyes of America.
02:14I'm staring into the close of America's eyes, and I like it.
02:18I've leached some of my best friends.
02:23Déjà vu, déjà vu. That's the name of my maid. She cleans everything twice.
02:28I haven't seen such a lively group since I threw up seven dead guppies from my butt.
02:34Take a couple of minutes to write down your overall reaction.
02:38We just reached five levels.
02:41Would you say the TV's kind of like your Bible?
02:43Kind of.
02:44Do you ever put your hand on the TV and pray?
02:48Yes.
02:50Do you think today you helped in some small way to murder culture?
02:55Yeah, maybe, maybe a little bit.
02:58These guys just mind-fudged their pants.
03:02If you can take a couple of minutes, I'm going to sound like a broken record for real now,
03:06to jot down your initial reactions, overall reactions to this.
03:10A little different, a little bit the same.
03:12By the way, gentlemen, this crazy device is called a pencil. It records ideas.
03:18What was your reaction to the test market segment that many of you were in?
03:24What was your reaction to that when you saw yourself in that, as part of this episode?
03:30I thought we looked pretty stupid.
03:33Same thing. You know, it's just like, you look stupid.
03:37How about watching yourself in the focus group? How it started?
03:42All of a sudden, we're at the table at home.
03:48At first, my mind was like, ooh, and then my brain was like, ooh, ooh.
03:52And then my bot said, Trevor.
03:54And then I said, what, what do you want? I'm eating.
03:57And then he said, knock, knock.
03:59And I said, what, what, who's there?
04:01And he said, you never spoke again.
04:05So, any other reactions to the actual test market, their focus group segment,
04:08that you, you know, little snippet that you were in there?
04:18I haven't seen anyone this articulate since my bot told me a knock-knock joke.
04:23I thought the kid was really funny, just because he was kind of fast.
04:28And I don't know if they're telling him what to say, but...
04:32Don't worry, they're not telling me what to say. That would be diaphanous.
04:36What do you think about the fact that you got mind-fudged?
04:40I don't think been mind-fudged.
04:43I think mind-fudged.
04:52What's the most important thing about your mind?
04:56It makes you think a lot.
04:58What kind of things does your mind think about?
05:02So many, you can't even think of everything.
05:05Name 20 of them.
05:08Where are you going? What are you doing?
05:11What are you going to eat?
05:13Where are you driving?
05:15When are you going to go to sleep?
05:17When are you going to wake up?
05:19What are you going to do at work?
05:21Seven.
05:22When are you going on vacation?
05:24Eight.
05:25Who are you going to see?
05:26Nine.
05:31I don't know. That's about it.
05:33Please, three more.
05:36When are you going to take the dog out?
05:38When are you going to take the garbage out?
05:43What time are you going to leave?
05:45What time are you going to get there?
05:47What are you going to drive?
05:49I'm going to finish up with the final four.
05:52Out of mind?
05:54Yeah.
05:56Okay, the final four would be...
06:00Walking out the door?
06:02Yeah.
06:04Going in the elevator?
06:06Going downstairs?
06:08And getting into the car and driving away?
06:10When you recap the day, what are the things you recap?
06:16Get up in the morning?
06:18Get washed up?
06:20Get dressed?
06:21Have something to eat?
06:22Have coffee?
06:25Where are you going? What are you doing?
06:27What are you going to eat?
06:29Where are you driving?
06:32When are you going to go to sleep?
06:33When are you going to wake up?
06:34What would you say to someone who paid money for this DVD?
06:38I'd say they got their money worth it.
06:40Say that into the camera.
06:42They got their money worth it.
06:43Do you think that should go on the sticker of the front of the DVD?
06:46Yes.
06:47What did you think of that one dumb guy that was in the show?
06:55I think he was just dumb.
06:56Didn't make any sense to me.
06:58You're so dumb that you should be on horse apples.
07:01High five.
07:03Yes, I don't high five.
07:05Okay, kick five.
07:07Yeah, I don't kick five. I don't do any of the fives.
07:09I don't do a high five, I don't do a low five.
07:11Okay, what about a four?
07:13No.
07:14What about a...
07:15I don't do anything where you have to raise an arm and then connect palms.
07:19Can you explain yourself numerically?
07:23Five.
07:25If you had a scale from one to ten, would you drink it up?
07:32Scale...
07:35Yes.
07:36You would, and what would your drink be?
07:39Probably just water.
07:41Where did you get those glasses? Inside a dumpster?
07:44No, I actually got them at my eye doctor.
07:48High five.
07:50I don't do that. I don't do high fives.
07:52Okay. Low five?
07:54No.
07:55How many levels of reality are there?
07:58I would say one.
07:59Can you identify it?
08:01Where you're going to eat.
08:05Where you're driving.
08:07Would you like to set up a clip? Let's go, let's set up a clip.
08:10Okay.
08:11Sounds good.
08:12Okay.
08:13Is this the most meta you've ever been?
08:17Yes.
08:18This isn't meta.
08:20This isn't meta.
08:22What did you think about it?
08:26What did you think about the...
08:28The what?
08:33I paid a lot of attention to it, and I thought it was not bad at all.
08:38I feel manipulated.
08:40Good. Now say it slower.
08:42I feel manipulated.
08:44Sorry.
08:46I feel manipulated.
08:49I feel manipulated.
08:52Sorry.
08:54I feel manipulated.
08:58Okay, okay. That's fine.
09:01If you were a sheep, and you are, what kind of sheep would you eat?
09:06Pork sheep, I guess.
09:08I didn't ask what you would do on the weekends. I asked what you ate.
09:12I didn't ask what you would do on the weekends.
09:15I didn't ask what you would do on the weekends. I asked what you ate.
09:19Oh, okay. Pork.
09:21I didn't ask what you do on the weekdays. I asked what you ate.
09:26Did you eat a piece of poop for dinner?
09:30No. Pork chops.
09:32Well, come on. If you ate a piece of pork today, it would be a piece of poop tomorrow, right?
09:37Right.
09:38So you ate a piece of poop for dinner.
09:40Right.
09:41Do you have any insults about how dumb I am?
09:43I guess I could try one like a joke. Ready? Knock, knock.
09:46Who's there?
09:47You're stupid. Don't say the rest. You're just stupid.
09:49Don't say you're stupid who?
09:51Want a high five?
09:52Yeah.
09:53No. I won't do it.
09:55I'm actually going to get out of here.
09:57I was just doing a joke, and I thought it was over, and it's okay.
10:01No, but we need the mic. We need the mic.
10:03What's that?
10:04We need the mic.
10:05It's fine. Here.
10:06Here's your microphone.
10:07Thank you. Bye.
10:08It's a good time to high five.
10:09No, it's not.
10:10Okay.
10:11See you later.
10:13Okay, see you.
10:17What's with that guy?
10:20Maybe he's an actor in Horse Apples, and I didn't notice.
10:26Maybe the guys who do the show just put him up to it.
10:32Maybe John and Vernon just totally pranked me.
10:36Maybe I've been mind-fudged. Have I been mind-fudged?
10:42To be continued...
11:12To be continued...