• 4 months ago

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00:00We'll be showing you style when you see the sign of legend.
00:07Are you happy now, excited?
00:08Be a keyboard player, play a legend.
00:09Are you gonna walk or not?
00:33No.
00:34You need to walk.
00:35But you look great.
00:36I don't know why Tati missed her category and at this point I don't give a fuck.
00:42When people miss their category for no reason, like that is just stupid to me.
00:46I know you won.
00:48Everybody's upset that you didn't make it into the function last night.
00:51I was gagging.
00:52I was like, what's happening here?
01:00I see him looking at me.
01:01And y'all see it too.
01:13I know what Andre likes.
01:15You know him better than me.
01:18I know Andre.
01:19And I think you know 2.0.
01:21I mean, we are girls.
01:22I'm definitely not the same person I was before.
01:24I've completely evolved from a few years ago.
01:27In terms of relationships and what I want, I've been single for nine years, so.
01:33AJ is starting to be a little disrespectful to my relationship with Lorenzo.
01:38So I'm gonna need him to watch that.
01:40Hi, baby.
01:41What?
01:42I'm trying to get a hot dog.
01:44Come on.
01:45Excuse me.
01:46What kind of barbecue is this?
01:47Y'all ain't got no mayonnaise.
01:48Ew.
01:49The ghetto.
01:50They don't have no mayonnaise.
01:52Let's talk about this shit y'all have at y'all house.
01:56Y'all didn't have nothing.
01:57But you ate it.
01:58It was dry ass mac and cheese.
02:00A dry ass piece of salmon.
02:01That's Ross.
02:02Ross can cook.
02:03Ross look like he was in prison.
02:15So what happened?
02:16I was gagging.
02:17Listen, this was supposed to be your big return.
02:19I know.
02:20New category.
02:21Are you gonna walk or not?
02:25We need you to walk.
02:26For real.
02:27Like, walk.
02:29I don't feel like I'm face ready.
02:33You never missed your category when you was topsy-dovey.
02:36Exactly.
02:37Like, when it was giving all of that, you was there, bitch.
02:40Like, what is it?
02:41You know what I mean?
02:42Um, I haven't walked in so long.
02:44And transitioning into a new category, it was kind of nerve-wracking to me.
02:48It was like a extra pressure put on me to where I kind of second-guessed myself
02:53because I want to put my best foot forward and that kind of like hindered me to like,
02:58I guess be insecure about walking.
03:01So it was just, it was a battle.
03:03Tati is off.
03:04That's my daughter and I don't like her to be upset.
03:06You need to figure it out.
03:08It's a battle for me.
03:09There's no reason.
03:10Like, you are a performer.
03:11You, the stage is where you play, right?
03:13Yeah.
03:14It's no different.
03:15I'm just very much like, I don't really know, bro.
03:20I'm not myself.
03:21I don't know what's going on.
03:24People want to see you.
03:25I want to see you.
03:26I want to see you evolve.
03:27I want to see you walk different things.
03:29I want to see the evolution of you.
03:31But I think you should apply that same energy that you had when you was like voguing,
03:37when you was like making people know who you are.
03:40But just, just find that fire again.
03:42I'm ready to come out and do my big one before they forget about me.
03:45It's giving.
03:46I'm ready to come out and do my big one before they forget about me.
03:47It's giving.
04:00Can you get me a drink?
04:02Let me hit that.
04:03Sister, I just got it, honestly.
04:05Listen up, guys.
04:06Last night was a big deal to us.
04:08And last night, I just kind of want to go over some things because I was very, very happy.
04:14I was very proud.
04:15It was a great night.
04:16You did absolutely amazing last night, sweetheart.
04:18Thank you so much.
04:19You look great.
04:20Fabulous.
04:21Fabulous.
04:22Thalita.
04:23She got her legendary status last night.
04:25Legendary!
04:26We were very happy about that.
04:28It was well deserved.
04:30Brooklyn.
04:33You look really fucking over last night.
04:35I really wish you could have walked.
04:37No, it's fine.
04:38Because I'm tired of voguing.
04:40It's not fun anymore.
04:41It's not fun.
04:42I just keep on winning and winning and winning.
04:44It's not fun.
04:45I'm not losing.
04:46That's not the objective.
04:47That says something to what you're doing.
04:50The reason why you're not losing is because you put in an award.
04:52This is kind of weird.
04:54Brooklyn is one of the voguing wonders of ballroom.
04:58People do things that they love, right?
05:00Are you voguing just to win or are you voguing because you love it?
05:03I vote because I love to vote.
05:05But I feel like now, in my life, it's becoming a job and it's making it not fun.
05:10Well, sorry for you that sometimes the things that you love takes you to different levels in your life.
05:16And it does become a job.
05:17It does become the thing that pays your bills, that takes care of your family.
05:21You know what I'm saying?
05:22Showcasing your talent.
05:24They know who you are because of voguing.
05:26You cannot throw something away that has catapulted you, that has given you a name.
05:31If it wasn't for that, you wouldn't be on that stage at all.
05:34Nobody would give a fuck who Brooklyn was.
05:36You just got to get out of her head.
05:37Like, I don't want to vogue anymore.
05:39Because it's probably going to pay her bills for the rest of her fucking life.
05:41Focus on that.
05:42It's marinated.
05:43She good.
05:44She good.
05:45It's marinated on that note.
05:46We're going to have a good fucking night.
05:48I want to know, how did it feel for you to hit the floor again last night?
05:53The return of Mr. Wonderful.
05:55Homeboy, who I lost to by one vote, did have my jacket on.
06:00But, you know how when you get to a certain point, if you look on point,
06:04it don't actually matter, like, what the fallout is.
06:07I'm having fame to keep on.
06:10The fame to keep on.
06:12I feel like nobody ever told you about nothing.
06:16You are a prospect, sweetheart.
06:19As a prospect, you don't understand where he's coming from.
06:21You really absolutely have no clue.
06:25When you're a prospect, you should definitely be on your best behavior.
06:28I mean, you're talking as though you're almost in the house already,
06:31and it just doesn't make sense.
06:32Like, you're not a Mugler.
06:34Why is he at the table?
06:36Thank you, Chanel.
06:38Oh, no.
06:39Miss AJ, you have a Mugler meeting, and you was overstepping your bounds.
06:42Good night.
06:43Can we ask the prospect to move from the table?
06:46This is a Mugler meeting.
06:48I don't know what you're talking about.
06:51Wow.
06:52I did not expect that from Xotic.
06:55You're not going to be a Mugler.
06:57And I helped.
06:58You know it.
06:59I'm here to help you.
07:00You feel better now?
07:08Who are you talking to?
07:09Andre.
07:11I don't have anything to do with this.
07:13I don't have anything to do with this.
07:15I don't have anything to do with this.
07:17I don't have anything to do with this.
07:19I don't have an attitude with you.
07:21I don't want you to get too comfortable.
07:22I see you've earned your spot in here.
07:23I understand.
07:24I need to learn my place.
07:25But I'm being clear about this.
07:26I want to be a Mugler, so I'm going to shut up.
07:28Look.
07:29I won't.
07:30I'm going to shut up.
07:31You and I want to be Muglers.
07:32Not me.
07:40Now we cannot.
07:41It's true.
07:42It's true.
07:50Growing up, there was like, you know,
07:52the everyday talking, the you gay,
07:55all of that, all of those things.
07:57And it was really hard for me because
07:59I felt like I couldn't really talk to anyone about it.
08:02But when I came to Ballroom,
08:05I found a lot of people like me.
08:12Mugler.
08:14Hey, baby.
08:16What's this?
08:19Are you doing?
08:20I'm good.
08:21So what you call this out here for?
08:27You know, I've thought about everything.
08:28I've thought it out.
08:34I just, like, noticed in myself,
08:38like, you know, I don't go outside as a boy.
08:40I don't live my life as a boy.
08:42And so I've actually started transitioning.
08:46Okay.
08:47Congratulations.
08:49Thank you.
08:50So what made you, like, come to the discovery
08:53that this is what you wanted to do?
08:55I always have thoughts about it.
08:56Like, there wasn't a day, like,
08:57I didn't think about transitioning.
08:59So it's like, you know, I felt like it was time.
09:03I kind of always knew that I wanted to transition,
09:07literally, since, like, I've started Ballroom.
09:11This is the only way to be my best self.
09:13And so being able to finally tell somebody
09:16that I'm deciding to transition,
09:18it's just, like, saying it out of my mouth to them.
09:21It's like, damn.
09:23And you guys are actually the first people I told.
09:25We feel honored.
09:27No shame.
09:28You know, Ballroom loves the evolution story.
09:30Bitch to the end.
09:31You know, they want to see that.
09:32It's going to be so over for you.
09:34They want to see that.
09:35Ready for us to sprinkle a little
09:37femme queen dust on you
09:39and turn you into the girl?
09:41Yes!
09:43So, like, what was transitioning like for you guys?
09:46Bitch, back when I was coming up in Brooklyn,
09:48I was very much living a double life.
09:49Like, I remember I would come home,
09:51I would get undressed on the roof,
09:52I would go in the house.
09:53Every time I would leave.
09:54On the roof?
09:55Yes.
09:56I used to have to go up there, get dressed,
09:57walk around the whole block, bitch,
09:58so nobody see me.
10:00So for a long time, like,
10:02I didn't know about transitioning and what it was.
10:05It wasn't until I came into Ballroom
10:07that I've seen, like, this is it for me.
10:10This is what I want to do.
10:12It's very special whenever a trans girl
10:14can come to terms with their identity
10:17and choose to live their life unapologetically
10:21and just be true to themselves.
10:24Because I know how hard that was for me coming up.
10:26Baby, growing up in St. Louis,
10:28the doctors, they didn't even really know what trans was.
10:31Like, they thought you was just,
10:32oh, bitch, you playing.
10:33Like, you just playing dress up.
10:34I'm being serious.
10:35You is laughing.
10:36Like, I got put out of school for being trans.
10:39Really?
10:40Yes, girl, I got put out of school for being trans.
10:42And, like, me and my mother, we had one altercation.
10:44Like, when I had first came,
10:46I had a 30-inch weave ponytail.
10:48My mama tried to snatch my ponytail.
10:49I was like, I'ma be the only bitch in this house
10:52and try to snatch my ponytail.
10:54It was hard.
10:55Like, it was hard, girl.
10:57When I was transitioning,
10:58I was trying to get hormones and stuff.
10:59The doctors would not let me.
11:01Like, I had to get them illegally from overseas.
11:05Like, now it's a cakewalk.
11:07They can literally just go down to the clinic,
11:09say, hey, let me get some hormones,
11:11and bada-boom.
11:12I mean, you there.
11:13Dang, girl, I'm proud of you.
11:15Bitch, if I could just be born, like, 10 years later.
11:18Baby!
11:1910 years.
11:20You really, really got it good, girl.
11:22Not only do you have it good within,
11:23but you also have your sisters
11:24who can help guide you the right way.
11:26Yes, honey.
11:27You know what I'm saying?
11:28When I was transitioning at a younger age,
11:30I didn't have nobody there for me.
11:32So I feel like I've lived a lot,
11:34and I got a lot of little knowledge to give,
11:36and that's what I'ma do.
11:37I feel like Brooklyn's big, long-lost sister
11:40that appears to be her very trans godparent, like...
11:44So how you feel about the house?
11:45Like, you think they're gonna be receptive
11:47to your transition?
11:48I think it's definitely gonna catch them off guard.
11:50So are you gonna still walk drag categories
11:52for the meantime?
11:53Or when do you think you're gonna switch over
11:54to femme queen category?
11:55You know, this year's a really busy year for the house.
11:57Right.
11:58So I don't wanna, like, jeopardize anything for the house,
12:01so I'm just gonna wait till next year
12:03to officially debut as femme queen.
12:06Okay.
12:07If ballroom finds out that I am transitioning,
12:11I will no longer be able to walk drag's performance
12:14and will be forced to walk femme queen performance,
12:17but I'm not ready to make the switch yet.
12:20Shh.
12:21Don't tell anyone.
12:22Well, bitch, congratulations, girl.
12:25We love you.
12:26I love you guys so much.
12:28We are here for you.
12:29If you need any advice, anything, we are here.
12:32We're just a call away, darling.
12:33Welcome to TransHug.
12:35Yes, ma'am.
12:36Thank you for having me.
12:53Cheers.
12:54Cheers.
12:55To Pride weekend coming up.
12:57I'm excited.
12:58I'm excited, too,
12:59so speaking of Pride,
13:01the Trevor Project wants me and the House of Mugler
13:05to be a part of their parade float.
13:08Ooh.
13:09Yeah.
13:10That's big.
13:11Oh, I'm really excited.
13:12Really big.
13:13But now it's, like, to be on an actual float,
13:14like, with the entire, like, with the house.
13:16Like, I think it's gonna be, like,
13:18a really great experience.
13:19The Trevor Project is definitely a perfect partner
13:22for the House of Miyake Mugler.
13:23We are both organizations that support LGBT youth,
13:27and also, it's an amazing opportunity for us
13:29to be able to showcase exactly who we are
13:32and show the world that ballroom exists
13:34and that ballroom is here to stay.
13:36I had a really good time at Yusha's BBQ the other day.
13:39How did you like it?
13:40Oh, your homeboy was pressing me real hard.
13:44AJ?
13:45AJ, yeah.
13:46I'm like, first of all, I've never heard of you,
13:49so everybody calm down.
13:51Like, look, Lorenzo, nice to meet you.
13:54Like, who are you?
13:56You would think y'all were married with three kids
13:58the way he was talking.
14:00Definitely not that.
14:01But we dated for a short time.
14:03You know, we had a deep connection, you know?
14:05The chemistry was great.
14:07Oh.
14:08Wow.
14:09But I just felt like he wasn't ready for our relationship,
14:12and I was trying to take the next step forward,
14:15and he just couldn't make up his mind.
14:17So I moved on, and then that's when me and I connected.
14:22Oh, God.
14:23Everything happens for a reason.
14:26I guess.
14:27It's just kind of weird that he's around.
14:29It's kind of like, what are his reasons
14:31of trying to get in the house?
14:32Like, I don't know.
14:34It's just mad weird energy.
14:37Well, it won't have any problems.
14:39You're good.
14:40I mean, I hope it doesn't become a problem.
14:43You know, I'm nice until I'm not, so.
14:45I'll be good.
14:46Huh?
14:47I'll be good.
14:49Yeah, you're good.
14:51I don't want to talk about AJ.
14:55The question is, do you want to get married?
15:02I mean, I'm not asking.
15:04I'm not saying.
15:05I thought you had a proposal.
15:06No, not now.
15:07This wouldn't be my proposal.
15:09Well, I mean, you know, in my case, been there, done that.
15:14Lorenzo and I have been dating for about two years.
15:17He was previously married, and that makes me a little nervous.
15:20So what are you going to do differently
15:22from your last marriage?
15:23What are you going to do this time?
15:26I think the difference this time, honestly,
15:29I was just so young.
15:31I'm a grown-ass man now, so I'm using my heart
15:35and not my eyes this time, even though, I mean,
15:38you're cute to look at or whatever.
15:41When it comes to the idea of marriage,
15:43I'm definitely ready for that, you know?
15:45But I just want to make sure that we're on the same page.
15:49I need to make sure that friends is the one.
15:53I'd be delighted to get married to you,
15:57but not, like, tomorrow, though.
16:19Believe it or not.
16:20Believe it or not.
16:21Believe it or not.
16:22We went through the city and shit.
16:24Hello, darling.
16:25Come up.
16:26Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
16:29Hey.
16:30Good morning.
16:31Good morning.
16:32Mwah.
16:33How you doing?
16:34This is ensemble.
16:35You know, this is a little, you know,
16:37welcome to my dungeon look.
16:38A dungeon?
16:39What are you thinking?
16:40Ah!
16:41So tell me, why the fuck did you bring me here?
16:43So I brought you here to get to know you better,
16:46because we keep seeing each other in passing.
16:48Yeah, and I'm tired of that.
16:49Exactly.
16:50Now we're going to be kicking it.
16:51We got to start at that motherfucking barbecue.
16:53What happened?
16:54You tell me what happened.
16:55You're the one who said, why she sitting at the table?
16:58I mean, it's no shade, like, because you're a prospect.
17:01You know?
17:02Yeah, I get it.
17:03So you're a prospect, and, you know,
17:04it wasn't, I wasn't being catty or nothing, but, you know.
17:07I didn't take you as being catty,
17:09but I did take other people maybe as being a little catty.
17:13Mm-hmm.
17:14Because I didn't have to yell or tell me to get up from the table.
17:16It was honestly a little bit of disrespect,
17:19and it was also weird to me because, you know,
17:21talking to Lorenzo,
17:22Zotto was giving different energy, honestly.
17:24He was giving a little reserve,
17:26as most boys try to do in front of their booze, but come on.
17:29I think it's also very clear,
17:30even when he was trying to be reserved,
17:32he couldn't keep his eyes off me.
17:34Yeah, you said you saw it.
17:36Oh!
17:38Shit!
17:39And look, I like him.
17:40AJ, you coming with the motherfucker.
17:44I'm like, I am, like, the one.
17:46The one.
17:47Okay.
17:48Oh, baby, you, you keep it hot.
17:50Yeah.
17:51You keep it hot, baby.
17:54Oh, my God!
17:57I question Lorenzo's intentions in the relationship.
17:59This man was a married man when he met Andre.
18:02If you were to be able to jump out of one relationship
18:05so quickly to get into another,
18:07it really makes me question, what do you want?
18:11And who are you trying to serve?
18:13I don't think there's any substance there,
18:14to be honest with you.
18:15And you just gonna come in like a thief of the night.
18:18Mm.
18:19Mm!
18:20That's the plan.
18:23I think all we actually need is some one-on-one time,
18:26just to clarify things.
18:28I think even if he tells me, which he will,
18:31I really love this boy, I really want to be him forever,
18:34I can look through his eyes and know the truth.
18:36So, have y'all talked about it since the barbecue?
18:39No, and honestly, the only reason I don't want to talk about him
18:42is because I honestly know I need his vote, too,
18:44and I want to be in this house.
18:45Mm.
18:46But after I get in this house,
18:47oh, baby, I'm gonna be asking questions.
18:49So you playing chess.
18:50You playing chess right now.
18:51You gotta play chess.
18:52I gotta get all the votes I can in order to get in this house.
18:55But I need you to, like, keep it on the low until then.
18:59I got you.
19:00Don't say a word.
19:01I'm...
19:02I just want the girls to, like...
19:03It's giving.
19:04Mm-hmm.
19:05Mm-hmm.
19:06It's giving.
19:07My tongue is cut off, yeah.
19:08We see each other.
19:09I got you, I got you.
19:10I wouldn't do that.
19:11Keep it cool.
19:12Mm-hmm.
19:13Because I gotta be in the glare.
19:14You ready to break up a happy home?
19:15Like, ew.
19:16Like, you handsome.
19:17Go find somebody else.
19:18Like me, baby.
19:19I was on your Instagram.
19:20You have nice pictures.
19:21Yeah, I'm serious.
19:22So I feel like you can help capture me.
19:23Okay.
19:24I want you to help me, you know,
19:25get some content for my OnlyFans.
19:26You have an OnlyFans?
19:27Get the fuck out of here.
19:28Yes.
19:29I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:30I'm the motherfucking queen of content.
19:31I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:32I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:33I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:34I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:35I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:36I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:37I'm the motherfucking queen of content.
19:38I'm the queen of OnlyFans.
19:39You know what I'm saying?
19:40Like, it's a business.
19:41Are you ready?
19:42What?
19:43How come not me?
19:44It's everything.
19:45She ain't gave you body.
19:46You mind?
19:47Yes, go ahead.
19:48Boys like the hair, right?
19:49They love it.
19:50And I...
19:51Mm.
19:52Mm.
19:53Mm.
19:54Mm.
19:55Mm.
19:56Mm.
19:57Mm.
19:58Mm.
19:59Mm.
20:00Mm.
20:01Mm.
20:02Mm.
20:03Mm.
20:04Mm.
20:05Mm.
20:06Ooh!
20:07Ugh!
20:08Okay.
20:09You thirsty?
20:10Praise the Lord.
20:11Mm.
20:12Mm.
20:13Hey, Daddy.
20:14Do you want to buy some KFC tonight?
20:15You can't say that.
20:16Have you ever had a crazy fan ask crazy person?
20:17Yeah, all the time.
20:18What do they ask you?
20:19People loves to see my fat ass eat.
20:26I got into OnlyFans during the pandemic.
20:29Like, I was just trying to make some money to pay my rent and shit.
20:32But then that shit just took off.
20:35You know, first I was making $5,000 a month,
20:38and now it's $40,000.
20:40Bitch, I make as much as a doctor.
20:43Have you ever fell in love with a client or a fan?
20:47No.
20:48No, because you're all about your money.
20:49Yeah, I keep it business.
20:51She is giving me sexual energy.
20:53It's very da, da, da, boom, boom, bop, bop.
20:55Like, they sitting up, and they pointing in my direction.
20:57Like, she's like on it.
20:59I can flirt with her cuz at the end of the day.
21:02I want to have more friends than a house.
21:05You ready?
21:05Mm-hmm.
21:06What can I?
21:07OK.
21:08Ah!
21:09What is this?
21:11Yo!
21:12What is this?
21:14Yo!
21:15What is this?
21:16You made it!
21:17Yo!
21:18Hey.
21:19Hey.
21:20Hey.
21:21Hey.
21:22Hey.
21:23Hey.
21:24Hey.
21:25Hey.
21:26Hey.
21:27Hey.
21:28Hey.
21:29Hey.
21:30Hey.
21:32So cute.
21:34Hi.
21:34How are you?
21:35I'm really great.
21:36I love this little picnic setup.
21:38I am curious about Miss Laina.
21:40I had heard all of the horror stories about her
21:44and her time in the house.
21:46But I do want to get to know her more.
21:48Thank you for inviting me out.
21:50I saw you at OTA.
21:52You looked amazing.
21:53Thank you so much.
21:55Right now, I'm here.
21:56I'm in New York City, so I want to see what's going on.
21:58I want to see the new generation of walkers.
22:01I want to prove to Yusef that I am being present for the house
22:05and, you know, and see where it goes.
22:07How long have you been in ballroom scene for?
22:09About five years.
22:10Wow.
22:11I got into ballroom.
22:12I was a cheerleader in high school.
22:14And there was this other trans girl
22:17that went to the same school, and she was like,
22:19if you like cheerleading, you will love ballroom.
22:21Like, what is ballroom?
22:22Like, ballroom dancing, tango, merengue.
22:24And she was like, no, ballroom, where people like us are at.
22:27The first time she taught me how to self-face
22:30was actually in a library.
22:31We were both in a washroom, like, learning how to self-face.
22:34She was like, hold on, wait, make sure no one comes in.
22:35We, like, locked the door, and we was just like,
22:37she was showing me how to self-face.
22:38But I had to learn.
22:39So that got me to Legendary.
22:42So where on the spectrum are you?
22:44Are you, like, trans?
22:47I am trans.
22:48I didn't really feel 100% as, like, a boy.
22:53Versus how I feel, like, as a girl.
22:54So I just knew.
22:56That's what's up.
22:56You got various part of family.
22:57How's your parents, your father, mother?
22:59What do they think?
23:00They actually don't know yet.
23:02How could they not know?
23:03I mean, you're spitting light of femininity.
23:06I guess it's new to them, so they don't really
23:08know, like, what to look for.
23:09Right.
23:11Only people I told were Tati, Chanel, and now you.
23:15Amazing.
23:15Well, thank you for sharing, though.
23:18Honestly, though, I'm still, like, figuring it out.
23:22It's been so hard keeping that secret from everybody.
23:27Sounds like you've got a lot of secrets
23:29that you're keeping from everyone.
23:30I do.
23:31I'm, like, a well of secrets.
23:33A drag queen is a person that lives her life as a boy,
23:36gets in drag for the life, and then when
23:39they get done getting their life, they take it off.
23:41She's living her life every single day as a woman.
23:44So if that's the case, then why are you
23:47lying, doing this category, when you're
23:48really a junior femme queen?
23:50You know what I mean?
23:51Like, you're in the best house where
23:52you can have those conversations with yourself
23:54and also with the family, and she's
23:56not even using that advantage.
23:58I know you told me at the ball that you
24:00wanted to get into modeling.
24:02Yes.
24:03The other day, actually, an agency reached out to me.
24:06Oh, congratulations.
24:06How tall are you?
24:07I am 5'8".
24:09You're a model height, so your body is slim and feminine,
24:12so that's the supermodel look.
24:14You know, I see that look for you.
24:16Do you know the first woman of color
24:17to ever be on the cover of Vogue?
24:19No.
24:20Beverly Johnson.
24:22Name your, like, name all the icons
24:23that you know from the modeling world, like, Black icon.
24:25Um.
24:31Have you heard of Tracy Africa?
24:33No.
24:33Tracy Africa was the first Black trans woman
24:36to ever be in Italian Vogue.
24:38And when they found out her tee, they basically, like,
24:42canceled all her contracts.
24:43She's, like, amazing.
24:44You should definitely research her,
24:45because she was the first one.
24:47You know, the fact that you can't name that one Black
24:50pioneer model, especially a trans one,
24:53you don't know who came before you, I just,
24:56you're disrespecting your culture
24:59by not knowing that we exist.
25:01You got to do your research on who came before you.
25:04You know, you're Black.
25:05And also being of trans experience,
25:07you got to be more and more prepared, you know?
25:09Like, because we get said no the most, too.
25:12I can help her if she wants it, but don't think because I'm
25:16in a position of power and modeling
25:17that I'm going to just give it to you.
25:19No.
25:20I definitely don't get any weird vibes from Laina at the moment.
25:23No.
25:23She seemed really, really nice.
25:25Thank you so much.
25:26And if you ever need any advice on anything with fashion,
25:30ballrooms, womanhood, please hit me up.
25:33I would love to help you in anything.
25:34I definitely look at it all.
25:36Thank you.
25:51Hello.
25:51Hello.
25:52How are you?
25:53I'm Tati.
25:54Nice to meet you.
25:55I'm Maddie.
25:55Nice to meet you.
25:56Thank you for having me.
25:57Welcome.
25:58I've been wanting to do therapy for a really, really long time.
26:01So Tati, tell me a little bit about your journey.
26:06I'm a Black woman of trans experience.
26:08That evolution played a big part in a lot of the trauma
26:12that I have today.
26:13What was happening?
26:14My mother always knew that I was different since young,
26:17and she always tried to make me more masculine.
26:21OK.
26:21At that point, I was the only man in the house.
26:25And she really wanted me to, I guess,
26:28step into that role because my father had passed away
26:31when I was three years old.
26:33That kind of, like, tore our bond apart, in a sense.
26:37Yeah.
26:38Because I was kind of, like, being penalized
26:40and, like, scrutinized for who I was.
26:42It kind of wasn't until I got into high school
26:45and I got introduced into the ballroom scene
26:47that I found out that there was a way for me to transition
26:52and be the person that I am today
26:55and the person that I always know myself to be.
26:58Sounds like you found sort of, like, a home.
27:01It took me a long time to, like, find my confidence
27:04and find my own voice.
27:06I feel like ballroom kind of gave me that, in a sense.
27:08Yeah.
27:09I can imagine that the process of transitioning,
27:12it was not an easy process by any means.
27:15Yeah.
27:16So I wonder, what is your relationship
27:18with your body like?
27:20Ooh.
27:22There's days where I feel insecure,
27:25especially because I just had surgery, liposuction,
27:30BBL surgery, and silicone removal.
27:33OK.
27:34But once I realized that I wouldn't
27:36be able to step right back into competing,
27:40I hit, like, a wall.
27:43I was supposed to compete in an event recently,
27:46and I didn't make it to my category.
27:49What was the obstacle there?
27:50Was it something about the healing process
27:53after your surgery?
27:54I felt kind of, like, nervous competing
27:59because I didn't know what my body was capable of yet.
28:02Yeah.
28:03And I'm trying to, like, find that confidence to participate
28:07and compete back in ballroom.
28:09So often, when you're struggling with confidence,
28:13it's hard to believe that you deserve
28:17to do the things that you already know you enjoy in life.
28:24When you're in a hard process, it's really important
28:28that you feel support.
28:30One thing that I would really encourage
28:32is letting the people who care about you
28:34and love you in on what that process is like,
28:38allowing yourself to feel in community.
28:41I do feel like when the time is right,
28:42I will definitely be slapping that floor.
28:44That confidence on the floor is what the judges look for.
28:47That's what sucks them in.
28:49So I need to make sure that I'm in the best position possible
28:53when I do hit that floor.
28:54You're going to get there.
29:04Pride weekend in New York City.
29:09Ah, man, there's even no words to describe it.
29:11Like, everybody's having a good time.
29:24Hey, honey.
29:30Give me a hug.
29:31Thank you.
29:32You're welcome.
29:33Hi, honey.
29:34How you doing?
29:35I'm doing great.
29:36Thank you.
29:37I'm thinking about how good this man looks at the end of the day I'm not
29:47gonna give up you only get but very few loves in your life right
30:07I'm exotic type I'm what he likes I look like every woman that every man in his
30:32family have ever married stop playing with me
31:02I hope so she's not here right now I was out there with all Brooklyn invited me
31:10to a patient I was gonna be her it was good I got to really know her
31:17I feel like she's one of the girls I feel like a really good place
31:24I already had an intuition that Brooklyn was transitioning
31:53but Laina brought it to my attention
32:23see what we finna give today I think I want to be skimmed out in some lace
32:34material happy pride show a little body a little tits little ass
32:46carry your ass up miss Kagume girl you gotta help me with my outfit girl what's
32:52your outfit giving girl she is see-through I look cute today I'm ready
33:05darling I'm so ready girl I'm excited it's my passion and especially being on
33:13a float that stands for LGBT suicide prevention it's gonna be a great time
33:18and it's gonna be a great cause he was like I still love exotic he said I'm a
33:29fight for what I want and it'll take over your butch we mine baby I'm dad
33:42honey look girl let's go ahead and get ready girl yeah cuz we gotta break this
33:46I need you to help me take my titties down I'm giving it to them like this
33:53sweet nipple
34:15happy pride bitches Laina's giving ambassador get on we gotta get on we
34:20gotta get on we gotta get on it's time to go happy pride
34:42man there's maybe no words to describe it like to be on a float in pride and
34:47see all of the millions of faces looking up at you like you see so much
34:52out in front of you and really was just a moment
35:17I was your first pride the crowd is going up for the body baby for the big
35:45body beans and I feel amazing
36:15really gotta go
36:20thank you for the house for joining us this pride season it's so important for
36:26us to celebrate especially during this time and you couldn't think of more
36:30special groups in the house
36:45I'm the g-o-e-a-t-e-s-t-g-o-a-t man it's no cap up in the o-n-e to get the b-a-g
37:01I'm screaming m-o-e man that was before as you know you go to a lot of these
37:08prides you don't really see people of color on floats on you know they were
37:13like just to see us I am so tired after pride baby my feet hurt my wig is
37:30shifted I am just ready to go to sleep but I can't go to sleep because Roz is
37:35farting I'm being real with y'all I'm not really big on like big crowds and
37:41stuff like that but like it would have been triage I have been in the same
37:55space but exotic multiple times our chemistry and our interactions are the
38:00same that they have always been I want to know how he really feels did you
38:06really think that we wouldn't have that conversation what kind of conversation
38:10you have that I give everybody the same the same treatment even Brooklyn I get
38:13my votes if she came to the meeting and do you also feel like there's not like
38:17an underlying intention between us for me I don't feel like there was ever a
38:34closure in our relationship I mean we never got to the point of actually being
38:38together so I was still single remember that was the reason why we stopped
38:42talking was because say you think it's my fault now I made it clear what I
38:46wanted and you made it clear what you did not want so I moved on you thought I
38:49was not ready yes you made it you wasn't ready how did I make clear honestly what
38:54you were like where you have the conversation you were like you act like
38:56you don't want it or whatever I said listen how to play games with you let's
39:00make the next step let's eat again let's have a relationship I was willing to do
39:04it and you were not really actually should have been together but the thing
39:09is now it can't happen because I'm already taking you're not taking I'm
39:15taking did you just go to him because you lost me
39:19Lorenzo did you get my man by double default you think I'm not gonna go for
39:22you if you're here huh you think I'm gonna stop looking to the way I look at
39:25you or stop being sweet and I see I know what you like I don't feel like I
39:30know AJ anything he had his moment he had his time and he dropped the ball
39:41my first proper way what was your favorite parts I just like to shake my
39:45breasts everywhere you know maybe don't say these gonna be on everybody
39:49they probably on channel 10 news right now well speaking of selling sex me and
39:56AJ collab for my only pants oh bitch this shit is getting messy this prospect
40:04ain't prospecting no more father Lolita seriously I had AJ didn't help me with
40:11hope to be my last only fan shoe what's help I had him to take pictures for me
40:15for my only thing so he's not no I want on his knees you weren't dragging him
40:22AJ I am fucking gagging boy sit your ass down I brought you here as my prospect
40:30not to do and only fans trying to get Chanel's vote I don't play those games
40:35let me make something very very clear bitch this is not a part of your
40:40prospecting process first he spoke out of turn at the barbecue but now this
40:49only fans thing happening between him and Chanel we're not seeing eye-to-eye I
40:57talked to Elena yesterday and she said that you guys went to like a picnic in
41:03Central Park and everything was like really beautiful and stuff yes it was a
41:07lot of fun we spoke about modeling we spoke about you know girl stuff so about
41:14the girl stuff she called you a woman like one of us like one of the girls
41:19and like possible like transition
41:29I don't know maybe maybe honestly I am a little shocked that Lena would say and
41:40anything too exotic and I'm gagging I haven't really decided yet though okay
41:47I'm still kind of unsure okay I would start this is that cuz I hadn't seen
41:52you like in like bitch-clean mode in a long time
41:58okay let's get back to this party I just like don't want to even be talking about
42:03this right now you know I'm kind of brushing it off because right now is
42:06definitely the wrong time I wasn't like ready to tell the parents about the fact
42:11that I'm making my transition
42:28exotic just came up to me you know hey I heard from Lena that you know like
42:32you're transitioning so she told your business but that's crazy did you have
42:41plans on telling exotic I did okay but she kind of did it for me so right
42:48later you didn't have no business hinting anything you don't do that
42:53that's not right that's not cool she had took your moment basically hmm I
42:59mean how do you feel about it I feel like that's really fucked up it
43:04definitely does piss me off like that is like really crazy to me no that's very
43:09crazy that she would tell your business I don't care who it is yes he's the
43:13mother of the house I don't care if I'm telling you something it should be in
43:17confidence of you you can tell somebody who's judging the ball and you may walk
43:20a drag category and they'd be like oh well I heard from Lana so I don't know
43:27we're gonna just call this strike one for Lena I decided to do something I
43:39decided to start transitioning the nerve I asked Lena what she thought about the
43:49girls of the house all the girls are copycats and she's the original like
43:54Tati's a copycat Janelle's a copycat well she don't know none of the other
43:57Mugler girls that she all right does she really feel like all you girls are
44:00copycat I'm gonna be real cuz I feel like every time we meet up it gives me
44:04spokeswoman bitch with ballroom is just like there's that love and family but
44:10also there's some negativity and there's some drama and there's some piece of
44:13haters