1985 Stitches Full Hot Movie
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🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:30Terence Newton, our first dean of medicine at Branford, once said,
00:00:38human beings are limited by the mere fact that they understand almost everything else in this world better than the workings of their own bodies.
00:00:47These photographs and these sculptured busts represent the individuals who have charted the world's most important maps, the maps of the human body.
00:00:57This skeleton is no Halloween decoration. It is the framework for the most intricate and delicately balanced machine known to mankind.
00:01:07The skeleton epitomizes the ironies of life, sturdy enough to absorb the punishment of war,
00:01:14yet with such grace and dexterity that you can dance on your toes, make music with your fingers, and stroll upright on a beautiful day.
00:01:24The air in these halls is thick with tradition. The walls are made with knowledge. Consider it a privilege to be here.
00:01:34To grow, we must never cease trying to find out the how and the why.
00:01:39That, ladies and gentlemen, is what anatomy is about. Anatomy is the key to medicine.
00:01:55I'll give you your table assignments. Table 1, Ducoux, Wayne, Flower. Table 2, Campbell, Williams, Santori.
00:02:033, Morton, Hernandez. 4, Carr, Gordon. 5, Brinson, Galliano. 6, Pappas, Robinson, Rossi. 7, Brooks, Thompson. 8, Miller, and Stanford.
00:02:20These are human beings. Human beings who at one time had feelings, emotions, and families.
00:02:29For most of your first year as medical students, they, not your professors, will be your teachers.
00:02:37Treat them with dignity. They have given their bodies to science.
00:02:45Treat them as you would want them to treat you if the roles were reversed.
00:02:50By the end of this course, you should be intimately acquainted with every part of your cadaver.
00:02:58Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time to meet your cadavers.
00:03:05Pull back the covering to expose the head.
00:03:141, 2, 3...
00:03:30What?
00:03:44Oh!
00:03:44Woo!
00:03:45Oh!
00:03:46Oh!
00:03:49Hi.
00:04:01Let's go.
00:04:02Woo!
00:04:03Woo!
00:04:05Out of the dark and into the open, where do we go from here?
00:04:11Hi, boys.
00:04:12Hi, darling.
00:04:13Nothing more left to fear.
00:04:16We gave it up for moments of madness.
00:04:19It's all a fantasy.
00:04:21Can you make my escape?
00:04:23It's a show, a new dream.
00:04:25Look at my ecstasy.
00:04:28One down, one left to go.
00:04:30You push the needle to the red.
00:04:33Then let go, no more slowing down.
00:04:40Take off, leave me behind.
00:04:42Now hold your ground, I don't want to end.
00:04:44Call this turn.
00:04:46No one's bringing you round.
00:04:50Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.
00:04:53It's all in the game.
00:04:56Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.
00:05:12One down, one left to go.
00:05:15You push the needle to the red.
00:05:18Then let go, no more slowing down.
00:05:24Take off, leave me behind.
00:05:27Now hold your ground, I don't want to end.
00:05:30Call this turn.
00:05:32No one's bringing you round.
00:05:36Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.
00:05:39It's all in the game.
00:05:41Sometimes you don't, sometimes you do.
00:05:44It's always the same.
00:05:47Sometimes you're right, sometimes you're wrong.
00:05:50There's no one to blame.
00:05:53Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.
00:05:58It's a disgrace, a damn disgrace.
00:06:01If those three students don't donate their bodies to science, I will.
00:06:04Come on, Gordon. This isn't a finishing school.
00:06:07We're here to teach medicine.
00:06:08That's your job.
00:06:11I've got the school's image to preserve, and believe me, I will.
00:06:14Do you honestly think Osgood Hamilton is going to donate money to an institute full of lunatics?
00:06:20Relax, Gordon. We're talking about a few students, not the entire student body.
00:06:24I'm sure you fooled around a bit in your time at medical school.
00:06:28Like hell I did.
00:06:31Let's forget about the kids for a moment and get back down to business, okay?
00:06:34I'm sure Francis here has a few more questions about his anatomy budget.
00:06:37Well, according to my calculations, my department had over $100,000
00:06:42before you approved of your special cryonics budget.
00:06:46And you know that cryo-freezing crap doesn't work, Gordon.
00:06:49Maybe not just yet, but if we figure out a way to freeze people
00:06:53and then bring them back to life before anyone else does,
00:06:58can you imagine what that'll mean to us?
00:07:01Us, Gordon? I hope to God you're not making any false promises to those people.
00:07:06No, no, maybe a few optimistic prognostications.
00:07:09Don't you understand?
00:07:11A human cryonic center will really put us on the map.
00:07:15In fact, I have convinced the Hamilton people to make a special freezing ceremony
00:07:22when the old man dies.
00:07:24And remember, Mr. Hamilton is old and sick.
00:07:29He could go any day now.
00:07:31Isn't that wonderful?
00:07:33What's the matter with you two?
00:07:35Priorities, Gordon. They're all screwed up.
00:07:37This isn't Disney World.
00:07:39Our main reason for being here is to turn out good doctors.
00:07:42And in order to do that, we need better research facilities,
00:07:45more equipment, and above all, top-notch professors.
00:07:47We even have a shortage of cadavers.
00:07:49We won't have a shortage of cadavers if I get my hands on those three student clowns down there.
00:07:55Gordon, Gordon, perhaps you should look around.
00:07:58And before you start building your reputation as a fundraiser to the stars,
00:08:02you better make sure that you're fulfilling your obligation as an educator to our students.
00:08:06Sidney, you are a very good assistant dean.
00:08:10But keep one thing in mind.
00:08:12I am the dean of medicine at Brantford University.
00:08:16Right, Gordon?
00:08:18Right.
00:08:24Breathe.
00:08:27Ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:08:29Pop, you got the body of a two-year-old.
00:08:33I got nothing to worry about with you.
00:08:42No trouble down here.
00:08:46If you don't mind, take a look.
00:08:51See what's going on down there.
00:08:53Might be a little chilly.
00:08:55Ahem.
00:09:02Do you mind?
00:09:07Ah, here it is, Pop.
00:09:11Just a little bit of constipation.
00:09:14One of these ought to fix you right up.
00:09:21Like a charm.
00:09:24I'll check in with you tomorrow.
00:09:39Hey, Ralph.
00:09:41Hi, Ralph.
00:09:43Hi, Ralph. How's it going?
00:09:45Hey, guys.
00:09:47You all right, Ralph?
00:09:49Yeah, anything we can do for you?
00:09:51Just not happy.
00:09:53You had a human-type emotion, like unhappy.
00:09:56You see this magazine here?
00:09:58It's entitled, You Become What You Eat.
00:10:00According to this magazine,
00:10:02I'm poisoning you kids with my food.
00:10:07I just don't like what this stuff is doing to your health.
00:10:10Oh.
00:10:19Barber seems to like the food.
00:10:21Yeah, I'm running for class president.
00:10:23I know you're gonna want to work on the campaign,
00:10:25so why don't you take the card and call the committee, okay?
00:10:27Sure.
00:10:29Excuse me. Dean Bradley?
00:10:31Dean Bradley, I just wanted to tell you, sir,
00:10:33how much I'm enjoying being a part of your medical school.
00:10:35Oh, well, thank you. Thank you very much.
00:10:37Well, I've admired your visionary leadership
00:10:39ever since I started here at Brantford.
00:10:41Well, even as a young undergrad,
00:10:43when I heard you speak on the subject of...
00:10:45I didn't catch your name.
00:10:47Pierce, sir. Howard Pierce. Howard Pierce.
00:10:50I appreciate your speech, sir.
00:10:52I've never forgotten the basic tenets
00:10:54you outlined on that day.
00:10:56Dean Bradley, I want you to know
00:10:58you've been a guiding light
00:11:00throughout my educational career.
00:11:02Pierce. Yes, sir.
00:11:04You know, I have your file dog-eared on my desk.
00:11:06You are the only student in this entire school
00:11:08whose career objective is to be a medical administrator.
00:11:10I'm happy to meet you, Mr. Pierce.
00:11:12Thank you, sir.
00:11:14One day I hope to follow in your footsteps
00:11:16and become dean of a medical school.
00:11:19Much tougher than being a physician.
00:11:21Believe me, I know. I used to be one.
00:11:23Yes, sir.
00:11:25Unfortunately,
00:11:27not everyone understands the importance
00:11:29of preserving our image,
00:11:31prestige.
00:11:33Our reputation as healers
00:11:35in this community.
00:11:37In fact, Pierce,
00:11:39there are people right here in this medical school
00:11:41who demonstrate the kind of disrespect
00:11:43that tears down
00:11:45the system,
00:11:48demonizes menace,
00:11:50and makes us look like a bunch of fools.
00:11:52Pierce, we have got big projects brewing here.
00:11:54No benefactor wants to be associated
00:11:56with a bunch of fools.
00:11:58Dean Bradley,
00:12:00is there anything that I can do to help?
00:12:02Pierce,
00:12:04you're only a second-year student,
00:12:08but I can use your help.
00:12:10Anything, sir.
00:12:12I'm putting you in charge
00:12:14of my special projects bureau.
00:12:16I am honored, Dean Bradley.
00:12:18I want you to help me clean up this medical school,
00:12:20weed out those undesirables,
00:12:22those cadaver impersonators
00:12:24that streaked across the campus.
00:12:26Consider it done, sir.
00:12:28And Dean Bradley,
00:12:30I want to thank you for this great opportunity, sir.
00:12:32Good. Get started.
00:12:34Yes, sir.
00:12:38Kiss ass.
00:12:40Just a little bit more to the left.
00:12:46More. More.
00:12:48A little bit more.
00:12:50A little bit more. There.
00:12:56There, Barfer.
00:12:58You see what a difference that makes?
00:13:00When the dartboard is right,
00:13:02everything else falls into place.
00:13:04Yeah.
00:13:06It's really starting to feel like home now.
00:13:12Damn.
00:13:16Ruin the machine.
00:13:18It's the best machine.
00:13:20It's the best one I got.
00:13:22If that sucker's stopped,
00:13:24then I don't know what I'm gonna do.
00:13:26Out of my way. Out of my way!
00:13:28Oh, thank God.
00:13:30Look at what they've done to you.
00:13:34Oh, thank God.
00:13:36You're still alive.
00:13:42Wait a minute.
00:13:45What do I do with the...
00:13:47Oh, no.
00:13:53Hey, look.
00:13:55Alky,
00:13:57things like this happen all the time.
00:13:59I'm under a lot of pressure in this business.
00:14:03Things haven't been going too good,
00:14:05and I'm a little late with my malpractice.
00:14:07So if you could cover for me.
00:14:09Everything all right, Ralph?
00:14:11Hey, I got everything under control here.
00:14:14And you guys, from now on, watch how you handle this machine.
00:14:18Thanks, Alky.
00:14:20Hey, guys.
00:14:22I'd like you to meet Sam Boone-Tarr.
00:14:24Boone's our new roommate.
00:14:26Boone, aren't you the exchange student I read about from Peking?
00:14:28Peking?
00:14:30Hey, you must know the Wongs.
00:14:32Oh, lots of Wongs in Peking.
00:14:34Yeah, yeah, but this guy wears glasses.
00:14:36Boone, this is Ralph.
00:14:38Oh, how do you do, Ralph?
00:14:40This is Bobby.
00:14:43This is Barfa.
00:14:45Oh, how do you do... Barfa?
00:14:47Yeah, it's a nickname.
00:14:49Barfa means to throw up.
00:14:51Vomit, be sick.
00:14:53It's slang.
00:14:55Oh, his family's sick all the time?
00:14:57No, no, see, it's because the first time
00:14:59he saw a cadaver face to face...
00:15:01Oh, Barfa throw up.
00:15:03No, the cadaver threw up.
00:15:05Man! Booze! Hold it! It's fixed!
00:15:07Ralph!
00:15:12I think he's tiring us out.
00:15:14Let's go?
00:15:16Take your bag?
00:15:18All right, perf.
00:15:20You found the right spot, finally.
00:15:28Oh, Cindy, you're a freshman, huh?
00:15:30Yeah, how about you?
00:15:32Med students.
00:15:34Med students? What a coincidence.
00:15:36I mean, like, wow, I'm thinking about going pre-med.
00:15:38It's just, you know, I'm just not sure
00:15:41I hadn't thought about that.
00:15:43I'll have to ask around.
00:15:45Well, guys?
00:15:47What do you think?
00:15:49Are pre-med girls popular?
00:15:51Why are you guys putting me on?
00:16:03Hey, Cindy!
00:16:05Did you ever find out if it was...
00:16:07Herpes?
00:16:11That was close.
00:16:13Yes.
00:16:15From now on, blood tests will precede all social intercourse.
00:16:17Good idea.
00:16:19And a good idea deserves a toast.
00:16:21Drinks on Barfa.
00:16:23Hey, everybody!
00:16:25Drink on me!
00:16:33That ought to cover it.
00:16:35Yeah, you can keep the change.
00:16:41Oh, Tina.
00:16:43Oh, I've missed you.
00:16:45What, Tina?
00:16:47I know.
00:16:49But if you were, you'd miss me, too.
00:16:51Come on. Let's dance.
00:16:53Hey, asshole.
00:16:55What are you doing with my Joan?
00:16:57Oh, my God.
00:16:59Oh, my God.
00:17:01Oh, my God.
00:17:03Oh, my God.
00:17:05Oh, my God.
00:17:07Oh, my God.
00:17:10Oh, my God.
00:17:12You must be the lucky guy.
00:17:14Joanie wrote me all about you.
00:17:16Joanie, he's everything you said.
00:17:18And more.
00:17:20What you must be thinking,
00:17:22Joan and I are first cousins.
00:17:24Sisters, we grew up together.
00:17:26How long's it been, Joan?
00:17:28Seven years?
00:17:30Wait till I tell Aunt Penny who I ran into.
00:17:32Please, don't be strangers.
00:17:34And that goes for both of you.
00:17:36See you later, sis.
00:17:52Yeah, come on. Introduce me.
00:17:54I don't know her.
00:17:56So?
00:17:58Talk Chinese to her or something.
00:18:06Do you know what the hell this guy's talking about?
00:18:09Uh, yeah. He just talks a little fast when he's nervous.
00:18:11But basically what he said was...
00:18:13Now, you correct me if I'm wrong here.
00:18:15He said that I, Al Rosenberg, would like to suck the nail polish off your toes.
00:18:19Do you want to dance?
00:18:21Come on.
00:18:27Oh.
00:18:29She's got a balcony.
00:18:31You could do Shakespeare off of her.
00:18:33Wait, here's one you'll like.
00:18:35Bambi Belenka.
00:18:38Bambi Belenka? Are you serious?
00:18:40Bambi Belenka, the renowned space cadet.
00:18:42Word is, she slept with every professor in the undergraduate school,
00:18:44and she still never broke a C-minus.
00:18:48Must be a real battle.
00:18:52Hey, Bobby.
00:18:54Hey, Stevens.
00:18:56Doesn't that sound like Nancy McNaughton?
00:18:58Yeah. You know she transferred to Boston to marry that Daffy?
00:19:00Yeah.
00:19:02She sounds like her, though.
00:19:04Come on, man. You're hearing things.
00:19:07You lost her. She's gone and married.
00:19:09Thanks for all the sensitivity.
00:19:11Hey, Stevens, over here.
00:19:17I'm not crazy. There's Nancy.
00:19:23What the hell are you doing back here?
00:19:25I thought you married that doctor in Boston.
00:19:29I couldn't do it.
00:19:31I just didn't love him.
00:19:33So, I'm back.
00:19:35Good idea, Stevens. You had nothing to do with it.
00:19:39Listen, I hate to hug and run, but I just got here,
00:19:41so I'll meet you in the library tomorrow morning at ten.
00:19:43Uh, Nancy,
00:19:45how about breakfast in bed instead?
00:19:49Too much.
00:19:51Right.
00:19:53The library.
00:19:57Ah.
00:19:59Well, is it my imagination, or are you happy to see that girl?
00:20:01We're just friends.
00:20:03Uh-huh.
00:20:34Hello.
00:20:36Hi.
00:20:38Are you one of our new medical students?
00:20:40Yes. I'm Bambi Belenka.
00:20:42Bambi Belenka.
00:20:44I've heard a lot about you.
00:20:46Your name has been tossed around quite a bit lately.
00:20:48Are you a professor?
00:20:50Do I look like a student?
00:20:52Oh, I'm sorry.
00:20:54I hear you have quite an impressive undergraduate record.
00:20:56I barely made it through biology.
00:20:58Daddy gave the school a lot of money to get me in here.
00:21:00He's gonna kill me if I don't make it through this place.
00:21:03I understand completely.
00:21:05Before I decided to dedicate my life to the betterment of mankind,
00:21:07I wasn't the best of students, either.
00:21:09Really?
00:21:11In fact, I must admit,
00:21:13I went through quite a number of cerebral traumas myself.
00:21:19What did you do?
00:21:21Well, eventually,
00:21:23I developed a study technique.
00:21:25I turned my whole life around.
00:21:27Suddenly, everything became crystal clear.
00:21:29I wish I had a technique.
00:21:32Seriously?
00:21:34But you'd have to put out.
00:21:36I mean, work hard and sacrifice.
00:21:38Hi, Bobby.
00:21:40Ah, Dr. Bogan.
00:21:42Dr. Rosenberg.
00:21:44I'd like you to meet Bambi Belenka.
00:21:46Bambi Belenka.
00:21:48Really, Bambi,
00:21:50your name's been tossed around quite a bit lately.
00:21:52I'm beginning to feel like a baseball.
00:21:54Dr. Stevens,
00:21:56one of your associates,
00:21:58Dr. Nancy McNaughton,
00:22:01She's early.
00:22:03Thank you, Dr. Bogan.
00:22:05Dr. Rosenberg.
00:22:07I'll meet you both at the faculty club.
00:22:09It's closed.
00:22:11The hospital lounge.
00:22:13They're redecorating.
00:22:15I'll find you, Miss Belenka.
00:22:19Now, Miss Belenka,
00:22:21let's get back to your study problem.
00:22:23The basic technique is very simple.
00:22:25It's merely to associate
00:22:27everything to your own body.
00:22:30Both externally
00:22:32and within.
00:22:34Let's begin.
00:22:39Shoulders.
00:22:43Ah.
00:22:45Hi, Nancy.
00:22:47Hi. I'm Bobby.
00:22:49He's over there.
00:23:00Ah.
00:23:02Ah.
00:23:04It's getting a little late.
00:23:06Why don't we get together in a few hours and work?
00:23:08Nancy!
00:23:10Uh, Nancy,
00:23:12this is, uh, Nancy Belenka.
00:23:14I mean, Barbara Belenka. I mean, Bambi.
00:23:16This is Bambi Belenka, and
00:23:18she wants to learn how to study.
00:23:20Bambi.
00:23:22And you want to learn how to study.
00:23:24Spumper here gonna teach you?
00:23:30Nancy?
00:23:34Nancy.
00:23:36So you finally found someone you're smarter than.
00:23:38It's not what you think.
00:23:40I'm not interested, Roberts.
00:23:42Nancy, you're gonna believe me? You're lying to us.
00:23:44What?
00:23:46Nancy. Nancy.
00:23:48Let me explain.
00:23:50It's really very simple. Do you mind?
00:23:52We're trying to have a private conversation.
00:23:54Would you get out of here?
00:24:00What happened, Stevens?
00:24:02Your membership to the men's room expire?
00:24:17Hi, ladies.
00:24:19You know those three cadavers that were on campus?
00:24:21If you have any?
00:24:23Woodstrom, how you doing?
00:24:25Larry, you want to study together?
00:24:27No, no. I'm busy.
00:24:30Hi.
00:24:34Rizzo.
00:24:40Ralph. My man, huh?
00:24:42Looking good, Ralph.
00:24:44Anything new on the horizon?
00:24:46Like a new comb machine or something?
00:24:48I don't know anything.
00:24:50But I haven't asked you anything.
00:24:52Fine. Goodbye.
00:24:54Wait a minute. You know, the dean and I...
00:24:56You're in trouble if you're holding that on me, Rizzo.
00:24:59Hi, folks.
00:25:01You know, I was wondering if I could ask a couple of questions
00:25:03just about some things that...
00:25:07Tomorrow we shall break up into two groups
00:25:09for the living anatomy class.
00:25:11That is a class where you will be introduced
00:25:13to the techniques of physical examination
00:25:15by practicing on yourselves and on one another.
00:25:17Gentlemen, you will please report to room 205
00:25:19at 9 a.m. in the morning. I will see you then.
00:25:21Ladies, please, you will report to room 317.
00:25:23At the same time, you will be required to strip to the waist.
00:25:25And so not to worry, you will have lady professors.
00:25:28Everyone, please remember your stethoscopes.
00:25:30Thank you very much indeed.
00:25:32What did he say?
00:25:34Let's get out of here.
00:25:36Ladies and gentlemen, please, please remain seated.
00:25:38I have an announcement to make.
00:25:40I am Howard Pierce.
00:25:42Howard Pierce of the Joint Student-Faculty
00:25:44Educational Research Committee here at Brantford.
00:25:46And I am happy to announce this year
00:25:48we have a new addition to our staff.
00:25:50A Dr. Randolph Reston, a curriculum scientist from Harvard,
00:25:52will be helping us to improve our learning
00:25:54and teaching techniques here at Brantford.
00:26:07Thank you very much.
00:26:09Thank you very much, Mr. Pierce.
00:26:11I'm going to be making this very short and sweet
00:26:13because I know you would all rather be off
00:26:15doing something else, like getting drunk
00:26:17or taking drugs or having sex.
00:26:23I would like to talk today
00:26:25about your future role as doctors.
00:26:27Are we putting back into the system
00:26:29as much as we take out?
00:26:31I, for one, say no.
00:26:33We can do more.
00:26:35And what better place to start
00:26:37than right here in your first year in medical school.
00:26:39Now then, let me introduce you to someone
00:26:41who can make this point
00:26:43much better than I can.
00:26:45Hi, Dr. Rosenberg.
00:26:47Ah!
00:26:50Ah!
00:26:58Ladies and gentlemen,
00:27:00this is Mr. Leonard Speedy Lotkin,
00:27:02as he appeared when we found him after impact.
00:27:04The finest ambulance driver
00:27:06in the history of Brantford.
00:27:08Or any other city, for that matter.
00:27:10Mr. Lotkin's accomplishments
00:27:12behind the wheel of an ambulance
00:27:14have reached legendary proportions
00:27:16within the medical institution.
00:27:19And you should be very proud
00:27:21that he was once a part of your hospital.
00:27:23His daredevil anything
00:27:25for the sake of the patient's style of driving
00:27:27has saved more lives
00:27:29than any doctor's medicine or surgeon's knife.
00:27:31Speedy Lotkin,
00:27:33a man who let it all
00:27:35hang out for humanity.
00:27:37A man who has given much more
00:27:39back to the system
00:27:41than he will ever take.
00:27:44Oh, dear.
00:27:50Oh.
00:27:55I am proud
00:27:57to call Speedy Lotkin
00:27:59my friend.
00:28:07I think that we all
00:28:09owe Speedy Lotkin something.
00:28:11And so does this admit
00:28:13administration. Five years ago,
00:28:15Dean Bradley initiated
00:28:17the Leonard Speedy Lotkin Fund
00:28:19so that we might all give
00:28:21something back to the Speedy Lotkins
00:28:23of this world. I am obliged
00:28:25to say that it is not
00:28:27mandatory, but your donations
00:28:29will be recorded on your official
00:28:31transcripts.
00:28:33Here, here, Speedy.
00:28:35What can I say but
00:28:37good show.
00:28:47Sit down. Sit down.
00:28:49Inspiring.
00:28:51It was inspiring, and you can continue
00:28:53to make your donations on the way out.
00:28:55But first...
00:28:57Ah!
00:28:59All right, this concerns
00:29:01tomorrow's living anatomy session
00:29:03that Dr. Kalid mentioned earlier.
00:29:05Ladies, there's been a change.
00:29:07Please go to room 403, not 317.
00:29:09That's right, 403.
00:29:11And gentlemen, be prepared.
00:29:13You'll be required to perform complete
00:29:15rectal examinations on each other,
00:29:17so please eat a very light dinner tonight,
00:29:19skip breakfast in the morning,
00:29:21and give yourself an enema before coming to class.
00:29:23And please, wash your hands.
00:29:27Wash your hands.
00:29:29Thank you. Thank you all.
00:29:41Gentlemen, if you'll kindly
00:29:43put on your trousers, we can begin the class.
00:29:45When are we going to examine
00:29:47each other's rectums?
00:29:49You can do whatever you please on your own time,
00:29:51but not during my class.
00:29:53But I had to give myself an enema this morning.
00:29:58Perhaps you're not eating enough raw fish.
00:30:02So, has Nancy spoken to you yet?
00:30:04Mm-hmm. She told me to get lost.
00:30:14Boone?
00:30:16What's this called?
00:30:18Uh, list.
00:30:20And what's this called?
00:30:22Uh, phonics.
00:30:24Good. Boone, I don't understand
00:30:26why they put you back in second year.
00:30:28Uh, he say I need to learn more English words.
00:30:30Well, it seems to me
00:30:32you got the rap down pretty good.
00:30:34We'll try a few more.
00:30:36What's the English term for this?
00:30:38Uh, pectoral legion.
00:30:40Boone, if I were you, I wouldn't repeat that.
00:30:42People will think you're old-fashioned.
00:30:44We haven't called it pectoral legion in years.
00:30:46Today, we just refer to the legion as the jugs.
00:30:50Jugs.
00:30:52Yeah. Um, what do you call this?
00:30:54Uh, mons pupus.
00:30:56No, that's changed, too.
00:30:58Now we just call it pussy.
00:31:00Pussy.
00:31:02Yeah. Good, Boone. Very good.
00:31:04Pussy. I'm glad you brought that up.
00:31:06Party upstairs!
00:31:08We are upstairs.
00:31:10Well, then, party downstairs!
00:31:12Let's go!
00:31:14He's crazy, but I love him.
00:31:16Me, too.
00:31:18Come on. Let's check it out.
00:31:20I do.
00:31:24Hey, Chairman Boone!
00:31:26Take a break.
00:31:28I can't break now, Bobby. I have a big immunology exam tomorrow.
00:31:30That's immunology, Boone.
00:31:32That's not a big exam. It's just a small quiz. It's easy stuff.
00:31:34Well, not for me, Bobby.
00:31:36Exam in English.
00:31:40Well, I don't feel like partying.
00:31:42Um, why don't you in the know sniff out the action,
00:31:44and I'll catch up with you later.
00:31:46We can always party.
00:31:50Yeah, I guess I could practice my English a little, too.
00:31:54So, Boone, what seems to be giving you all the trouble?
00:32:10Hello. Hello. Come right in.
00:32:14Gentlemen.
00:32:18That's it?
00:32:20That's it.
00:32:22Back row.
00:32:34You got a dollar?
00:32:36Thanks.
00:32:38Bye.
00:32:42Uh, sorry. Full house.
00:32:46There might be room for one more.
00:32:50Wingside.
00:32:52Uh, scorecard.
00:32:54It's coming through.
00:32:56Come on.
00:32:58Come on.
00:33:00This is as close as you get.
00:33:02All right, Rockefeller.
00:33:04All right.
00:33:20It's showtime.
00:33:34Oh, yeah.
00:33:38God, we never have any fun.
00:33:48Holy smoke.
00:33:50Shh.
00:33:52Shh.
00:34:02Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen.
00:34:04The third one to the left,
00:34:06what would your prognosis be?
00:34:08Yeah.
00:34:22Don't tell me it's time to come through.
00:34:24Shh.
00:34:26Shh.
00:34:30There's no more room.
00:34:32What's going on in there?
00:34:34Behavioral experiment in self-control, sir.
00:34:36Da-da-da-da-da.
00:34:38Da-da-da-da-da.
00:34:40Da-da-da-da-da.
00:34:42Gentlemen, another diagnosis?
00:34:44Uh, the little blonde little girl in the back.
00:34:46All right.
00:34:50Oh, you guys are cruel.
00:34:52You're real cruel.
00:34:58Ooh.
00:35:06Oh, don't film me.
00:35:14Oh, my God, she's waving at you.
00:35:26Hot dog, I got your hot dog right here.
00:35:28Run, run, run.
00:35:30Run, run, run.
00:35:32Da-da-da-da.
00:35:36Shh.
00:35:38Shh.
00:35:44Da-da-da-da-da.
00:35:46Da-da-da-da-da.
00:35:48Da-da-da-da-da.
00:35:50Shh.
00:35:52Behavioral experiment in self...
00:35:54Nancy.
00:35:56Aw.
00:35:58Bobby, you're not supposed to bring a date to this.
00:36:00Oh.
00:36:02Oh.
00:36:06A fundraiser for charity.
00:36:08Bob Stevens relief fund.
00:36:10What a cheap stunt.
00:36:12You guys are absolutely revolting.
00:36:14This isn't funny.
00:36:16It's an invasion of privacy.
00:36:18It has nothing to do with sex.
00:36:20It has to do with common decency.
00:36:24What's the matter?
00:36:26You guys never seen tits and ass before?
00:36:28I'll show you tits and ass.
00:36:30Nancy, why don't we discuss this out in the hallway?
00:36:32You hold this.
00:36:34Well, boys, what do you think?
00:36:40You know what these are?
00:36:42That's jocks. That's pussy.
00:36:44Not now, Berman.
00:36:56Remember, annual physicals are on Saturday.
00:36:58Saturday?
00:37:00Come on, Dr. Berman.
00:37:02We lose the entire afternoon.
00:37:04Yeah, can't we, like, check ourselves out?
00:37:06Sorry, guys.
00:37:08No physicals, no grades.
00:37:10Gotta see a man about some flowers.
00:37:12What?
00:37:22Come on.
00:37:24You scared me.
00:37:26Nancy, what is it you want?
00:37:28I have a small favor to ask of you.
00:37:30Small favor?
00:37:32Well, if you can get your brother Biff down here
00:37:34and let me buy him a dozen roses,
00:37:36I'll do anything for you. You know that.
00:37:38Okay, okay, I'll see what I can do.
00:37:40Okay, this is it.
00:37:48Oh, it's a deal.
00:37:50I knew it.
00:37:52Ruining another Saturday on this shit.
00:37:54Wasting hours of sleep
00:37:56so some guy can shove his thumb up our ass.
00:37:58We're up all night studying.
00:38:00Ready?
00:38:02Dictionary.
00:38:04All right, gentlemen, we've got a little privacy now.
00:38:07Let's just stop our complaining, huh?
00:38:12And drop your pants now!
00:38:16I guess it's time to make sure we're all men.
00:38:24All right.
00:38:26Hands a little cold, huh?
00:38:28Yeah, they'll warm up in a little while.
00:38:30All right, cough. Now, one more time.
00:38:32Cough again? How long you had this cough?
00:38:34Well, looks like this myth is really a myth, huh?
00:38:36Hey, brother, give me five.
00:38:38Oh, looks like about nine there.
00:38:40That's pretty good. All right, cough.
00:38:42Let's form an Oreo cookie, what do you say sometime?
00:38:44Just kidding.
00:38:46Hey, a farm boy. All right.
00:38:48Well, looks like you've been overworking that little pecker, huh?
00:38:50Nothing went there but stretch marks.
00:38:52All right, cough.
00:38:54Never mind, farm boy. Give me a...
00:38:56Yeah, I love you.
00:38:58Oh, what a mess.
00:39:00There's nothing there. It's a damn shame.
00:39:02What do you use, tweezers when you take a leak?
00:39:04All right, let's go for it, cough.
00:39:06Did you feel anything?
00:39:08No.
00:39:10Me neither. There's nothing...
00:39:12Hey, where's the beef?
00:39:14There it is.
00:39:16My breath, it just went out of my mouth up there somewhere.
00:39:18Oh, you are a big sucker too.
00:39:20Looks like you could kick this shit out of me.
00:39:22Yeah, let's lock him into that.
00:39:24Oh, your nipples are hard. I love to breastfeed.
00:39:26You know you're beautiful when you're angry.
00:39:28You really are.
00:39:30Cough for me, okay?
00:39:32Louder.
00:39:34Oh, I love when you dominate.
00:39:36Oh, heaven can wait.
00:39:38This must be a man called Horse.
00:39:40Let me guess, let me guess.
00:39:42Eight inches right from the floor.
00:39:44Call me Friday, we'll pick out furniture.
00:39:46It's your turn to cough.
00:39:50Talk dirty.
00:39:52Fuck you.
00:39:54Was it good for you?
00:39:56Yep.
00:39:58Come on, Al.
00:40:00Come on.
00:40:12Oh, thanks, Ramon.
00:40:14I was heaven. I'm in heaven.
00:40:18Okay.
00:40:20The category is antibodies.
00:40:22For $100 and a chance to win that welfare family,
00:40:24name three types of receptors
00:40:26on the macrophage.
00:40:28General, FC, and complement are all on the macrophage.
00:40:30I wonder if that's any relation to this.
00:40:32Jennifer Macrophage.
00:40:34Would macrophage be binding with antibodies?
00:40:36She'd bind with anybody.
00:40:38But it's the FC receptor that enables it to bind.
00:40:40Now it's your turn.
00:40:42Ask me anything
00:40:44about baseball.
00:40:46Whoa, look out there. Watch your needle.
00:40:48Huh? What do you think?
00:40:50Hi, Ralph. Hi, Boone.
00:40:52Ralph. Boone.
00:40:54We just wear traditional whites.
00:40:56I know it's boring, but we find it very functional.
00:40:58Yeah, you better change before we get to the hospital.
00:41:00I am surprised at you guys.
00:41:02All right, Ralph.
00:41:04What gives?
00:41:06As honorary director of this year's medical school review,
00:41:08I have finally come up with a theme.
00:41:10We are gonna put on
00:41:12a grand Ziegfeld-type pageant.
00:41:14But rather than the elegance and the dignity
00:41:16of the old Ziegfeld girls,
00:41:18our pageant is going to exhibit
00:41:20distinct bad taste.
00:41:22We're gonna be costumed
00:41:24in everything medical.
00:41:26Hearts, lungs, organs,
00:41:28heat rash. This will be an absolute
00:41:30spectacular.
00:41:32Costume department is working right now.
00:41:34Boone, here's the prototype.
00:41:36Boone, do what I showed you.
00:41:38Oh, not here. Not now.
00:41:40Come on, Boone. Come on.
00:41:42Boone, go ahead. It's in your blood.
00:41:44One, two, three, four.
00:41:46Whoo!
00:42:06Would you people please keep it down?
00:42:08We are trying to hold a student council meeting downstairs
00:42:10and we can barely hear ourselves think.
00:42:12Aww.
00:42:14Party time!
00:42:18Come on.
00:42:20Bobby.
00:42:22Now you go. Hey.
00:42:24Come on.
00:42:26Forget her.
00:42:28Nancy McNaughton is trouble.
00:42:30She's a smart girl with integrity.
00:42:32If you want somebody like that, I'll set you up with my mother.
00:42:34But she's got no sense of humor.
00:42:36That's for sure. None at all.
00:42:38And you're a fun guy.
00:42:40Look, Bobby, you've got no commitment to her.
00:42:42I mean, if she doesn't like you the way you are...
00:42:44Forget her.
00:42:46Tell her to meet the sidewalk.
00:42:48Because guys like you and me,
00:42:50we got one thing that's real special.
00:42:54Thanks, Al.
00:42:56I feel better already.
00:43:13Here come the new rookies.
00:43:17Yeah, another wave of invitations
00:43:19for beer and pretzels at the local tavern.
00:43:26All right, this is not a social event.
00:43:28Make way for the real medical people. Come on.
00:43:30There's sick people here.
00:43:32Move over toward the wall.
00:43:34How about a magazine?
00:43:36Where are you going?
00:43:38The guy's terminal.
00:43:40I think you need a change of address card.
00:43:42Move over toward the wall.
00:43:44All right, ladies and gentlemen,
00:43:46may I have your attention, please?
00:43:48Come away from the wall. Come on, gather round.
00:43:50I'd like you to meet Dr. Hillary Green and Dr. Mitchell Lambert.
00:43:52Two top-notch physicians
00:43:54will be helping me take you on your rounds this year.
00:43:56We'll divide into two groups later. Let's go.
00:43:58Ladies!
00:44:00Wait until you see the stud in room 444.
00:44:02What's he in for?
00:44:04You'll find out.
00:44:06You'll be spending a lot of time
00:44:08in that wing of the hospital.
00:44:10Now, for God's sake, don't be afraid to ask for assistance.
00:44:12Remember, there are no dumb questions,
00:44:14just dumb mistakes.
00:44:16Ah, here's the temporary home of Osgood Hamilton,
00:44:18the man your medical building was named after.
00:44:20Now, Mr. Hamilton is suffering
00:44:22from an incurable disease called old age.
00:44:24He's 90-something years old.
00:44:26We've got to make his last days here as comfortable as possible.
00:44:28And, of course, as you've probably already heard,
00:44:30when he dies, we're going to freeze him
00:44:32until such a time as one of you young geniuses
00:44:34can figure out a way to bring him back.
00:44:36So, that's the end of the tour.
00:44:38You can break back to your groups and go on your rounds, huh?
00:44:40Break!
00:44:46This is it, room 444.
00:44:56Good morning.
00:45:02Ladies and gentlemen, this is Mr. Ted Fletcher.
00:45:04Hi, Doc.
00:45:06Hi, girls.
00:45:08Hi, Ted.
00:45:10Mr. Fletcher is here for a hernia operation.
00:45:12Oh.
00:45:14By the way, Doc, I've been here two weeks now.
00:45:16When do I get the operation?
00:45:18Soon, Ted, soon.
00:45:20We don't like to rush into these things.
00:45:24Ah.
00:45:26Mr. Fletcher's condition gives us the opportunity
00:45:28to practice a genital urinary examination
00:45:30and see what a real hernia feels like.
00:45:34Okay, Mr. Fletcher,
00:45:36would you mind standing up
00:45:38and, uh, lowering your pajamas?
00:45:42For you, Doc, any time.
00:45:54Ah!
00:46:00Um, but it's also important
00:46:02as doctors that you know
00:46:04what a healthy patient feels like, too.
00:46:06Mr. Stevens.
00:46:10Perhaps you can help us out.
00:46:12Why don't you step over here next to Ted
00:46:14and drop your drawers
00:46:16so we can compare yours to his.
00:46:22Whoa, big fella.
00:46:24Easy, boy.
00:46:26Easy, boy.
00:46:28Whoa, trigger!
00:46:30This hospital ain't big enough for the two of us.
00:46:32So trigger and I
00:46:34will mosey on down to the courtyard.
00:46:36Ready?
00:46:40Mr. Stevens!
00:46:42I'm busy!
00:46:46I'll catch up with you.
00:46:48Bobby.
00:46:54Nancy.
00:46:56Oh, Nancy.
00:46:58Yes, Howard?
00:47:00I'm the special guest at Dean Bradley's reception this Saturday
00:47:02and I wanted to know if you'd be my escort.
00:47:04The dean and I are working on a couple of things together.
00:47:06There'll be a lot of important people there.
00:47:08I wouldn't miss it if I were you.
00:47:10It's not your normal riff-raff, you know.
00:47:12Saturday?
00:47:14Gee, Howard, I'd love to,
00:47:16but give me a few moments
00:47:18and I'll get right back to you with a good excuse.
00:47:20Hey, Bobby, wait, wait.
00:47:22Isn't this, uh, it's Miss Herpes.
00:47:24Yeah.
00:47:26And it's a good thing, too.
00:47:28Why's that?
00:47:30Because I have a favor to ask her.
00:47:32Hi, Cindy.
00:47:34Hi.
00:47:36How are you?
00:47:38Can I have a word with you?
00:47:40Sure.
00:47:42That's right, the dean and I are very close.
00:47:44Oh, really?
00:47:46I expect it to be quite an enlightening evening.
00:47:48Oh, really?
00:47:50Now, do you really think Pierce deserves that?
00:47:52Al, a guy like Howard Pierce
00:47:54can't be trusted.
00:48:04You sure you saw them in here this afternoon?
00:48:06Positive.
00:48:08Great picture of the financial aid bond.
00:48:10Maybe she made an amount.
00:48:12No, she hasn't.
00:48:14Yeah, they are.
00:48:16Here's the original, too.
00:48:18How sweet it is.
00:48:20Dear first-year student,
00:48:22this institution is my pleasure to welcome you
00:48:24to the halls of Brantford University School of Medicine.
00:48:26Bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit.
00:48:28I'll be giving a formal outdoor buffet dinner at my home
00:48:30on Saturday, September 17th at 4 p.m.
00:48:32I very much hope that you will be able to join us at that time.
00:48:34Yours sincerely,
00:48:36Gordon E. Bradley, dean of medicine.
00:48:38A bit stuffy, don't you think?
00:48:40I'll type.
00:48:42You Xerox.
00:48:46I wonder if Mayo had a beard.
00:48:48Judith!
00:48:50We have got to make this affair
00:48:52particularly special.
00:48:54Ozzie Hamilton, Jr.,
00:48:56the son of the old man, will be there.
00:48:58He'll be looking over our new crop of students,
00:49:00and he's the one that controls the money.
00:49:02Oh.
00:49:04We'd better have music.
00:49:06Yeah, patignified.
00:49:08String quartet.
00:49:10Now, if I get that Hamilton money
00:49:12that will open up the floodgates,
00:49:14the wealthy people will stand outside our door
00:49:16and I'll be on my way.
00:49:18I'll hold a press conference.
00:49:36You sure you have the right invitation?
00:49:38Yes, there's a punk party at the dean's place.
00:49:40Yep.
00:49:48May I have your invitation, please?
00:49:56Oh.
00:50:02Oh, this is not right.
00:50:04Don't worry, Boone, you look great.
00:50:06It's some of our best work.
00:50:08It's you, Boone, it's you.
00:50:10But there's something missing.
00:50:19Honk.
00:50:39Nice cut.
00:50:41This is the best fair Gordon's ever thrown.
00:50:43Yes, I'd like to shake the hand of whoever's responsible.
00:50:45I'll catch you later.
00:50:49Where is Gordon?
00:50:51He and his wife went to personally escort
00:50:53the Hamilton party with a limousine.
00:50:55You ought to make sure they get the royal treatment.
00:50:57Should we call to warn them?
00:50:59About what?
00:51:01Yes, officer,
00:51:03these damn kids are making a terrible racket.
00:51:05And I smell drugs, too.
00:51:07I can't hear you.
00:51:13What? What?
00:51:15Help! Oh, help!
00:51:19Help!
00:51:21I need help!
00:51:23I have no soul!
00:51:25I am out of control!
00:51:27Help!
00:51:29We've got no rights!
00:51:31We've got to leave this world!
00:51:33Help!
00:51:35Help!
00:51:37Help!
00:51:39Just like me!
00:51:41Help!
00:51:43Just like me!
00:51:45This is just like a dream
00:51:47This is just like a dream
00:51:49Alright, alright, alright!
00:51:51We have a totally rotten time of one!
00:51:53And here is the man who brought it all to a sting!
00:51:59Gordon Bradley!
00:52:06You better check your back, Bradley!
00:52:08A man of Oscar Hamilton's nature cannot be associated with another dimension.
00:52:11Don't mention this to your father. I'll find out who did this!
00:52:14I'll purge them from my medical school!
00:52:17May I have the honor of this dance?
00:52:24Why me?
00:52:25Pierce!
00:52:28Bradley, I'd like you to meet Cindy.
00:52:30How in the hell can you let a thing like this happen?
00:52:33This is what I brought you here to prevent?
00:52:35I want you to find out who did this to me.
00:52:37No excuses! Action!
00:52:39He's gonna make a fool out of me!
00:52:42Oh!
00:52:43Balloon!
00:52:48Wow!
00:52:50Bye!
00:52:56Arrest him!
00:53:06Thank you everybody and I'll see you on Thursday.
00:53:08Settle down!
00:53:09One minute.
00:53:10Before we disband, Howard Pierce would like to have a few words with you.
00:53:20Are we finished?
00:53:21Good.
00:53:24Now, I don't know how many of you are aware of the fiasco that occurred at Dean Bradley's house.
00:53:32Well, I don't think it's very funny.
00:53:34And neither does Dean Bradley.
00:53:37That was a cruel joke.
00:53:39I was there and I felt embarrassed for the school.
00:53:45Now, we all have a good idea of who's responsible for this.
00:53:50But, we need proof.
00:53:56We stop protecting these people who are only interested in making a mockery out of medicine.
00:54:06Are you happy, Mr. Mendelbaum?
00:54:08Yes, Dr. Fowler.
00:54:10Are they treating you nicely?
00:54:11Oh, yes, Dr. Fowler.
00:54:13Good. We want you to be happy here at Brantford.
00:54:15Oh, I am, Dr. Fowler.
00:54:17Mr. Tom, Mr. Pierce.
00:54:20I want you to follow the questioning on this phone.
00:54:23To take Mr. Mendelbaum's history.
00:54:25Enjoy your lunch, Mr. Mendelbaum.
00:54:27Oh, thank you, Dr. Fowler.
00:54:29I just love hospital food.
00:54:32Dr. West. Dr. West, dial 401, please.
00:54:35Dr. West, dial 401.
00:54:36Mr. Tom.
00:54:40All right, slant eyes.
00:54:42I need some information and I think you've got it.
00:54:44What do you mean, Howard?
00:54:45What do you mean, Howard? What do you mean, Howard?
00:54:47Learn to speak English. You're an American now, you ignorant commie.
00:54:50Howard, I don't understand.
00:54:51Don't play dumb with me, chinky.
00:54:53Nobody does that better than I do.
00:54:55You know what I'm talking about.
00:54:56You're hanging out with the wrong people, Mr. Boom.
00:54:59They've embarrassed this institution and our dean.
00:55:01And you, of all people, should be grateful to Dean Bradley
00:55:04for giving you the opportunity to study in this country.
00:55:06I am. I am.
00:55:07Why are you protecting those fools?
00:55:09Let me tell you something.
00:55:11I'm going to give you some time to reconsider.
00:55:13Because if you don't, I'm going to make sure that you're up to your ass.
00:55:18You compulsive, over-eating fat slob.
00:55:22You absolutely disgust me.
00:55:24I hope you choke.
00:55:27Oh, Mr. Mendelbaum.
00:55:30Not another examination.
00:55:32Practice makes perfect, Ted.
00:55:36Half of them aren't even doctors.
00:55:39How about a cup of coffee?
00:55:41Actually, I was planning on visiting Ted.
00:55:44See you later.
00:55:45Bye.
00:55:46How about you, Dr. Fields?
00:55:48It's Richard, please.
00:55:50I'd like to, Nancy.
00:55:52But there are a few more lives I'd like to save today.
00:56:00We're still on for seven.
00:56:02Of course.
00:56:03And if you can't get a ride, call my service.
00:56:08Okay.
00:56:13Stevens.
00:56:18It is Stevens, isn't it?
00:56:20Yes, Dean Bradley.
00:56:21I'm curious as to why you've chosen to attend
00:56:25Branford University School of Medicine.
00:56:28It isn't because you want to become a doctor, is it?
00:56:33From the reports I've received on you recently,
00:56:37you have no reason to be concerned about that.
00:56:42You won't.
00:56:44Nice talking to you, Dean Bradley.
00:56:48Somebody help me!
00:56:50My husband is dying!
00:56:52Please help me!
00:56:54Somebody!
00:56:55Senor, please help me!
00:56:57My husband!
00:57:01Senor, help me, please!
00:57:04Get the emergency team inside!
00:57:06The emergency team, hurry!
00:57:09Come on!
00:57:10Come on!
00:57:39Come on!
00:57:44Come on, you gotta move, mother!
00:57:52He's alive!
00:57:57Look out, look out!
00:58:04Stevens.
00:58:05Good work, son.
00:58:06Welcome aboard.
00:58:31Can I buy you dinner?
00:58:32Can I buy you dinner?
00:58:34Unfortunately, I'm already late for the parade.
00:58:40Is it the doctor?
00:58:42Can I take a rain check?
00:59:02You see, Nancy, in choosing a specialty,
00:59:04one must study the demographics of a particular region,
00:59:06as I did when I selected Brantford.
00:59:08First, you must determine whether human need exists
00:59:10for your particular brand of medicine,
00:59:12and second, you must determine whether the local economy
00:59:14can afford your fee structure.
00:59:16I, of course, chose cardiology,
00:59:18but that was purely for emotional, humanitarian reasons,
00:59:21and by pure coincidence,
00:59:23with the number of elderly people in the community,
00:59:25the average age of the population,
00:59:27and the number of people in the community
00:59:29By pure coincidence,
00:59:30with the number of elderly people in the community,
00:59:32the financial end worked out very well.
00:59:34I'm a very wealthy man.
00:59:36Richard, I'm sorry, I'm not feeling well.
00:59:38Oh, I'm sorry, Nancy.
00:59:40I'll get you an aspirin.
00:59:41A Darvon.
00:59:42A Lude.
00:59:43No, that won't help.
00:59:45Please, go see the show.
00:59:47I don't want to ruin your evening.
00:59:48Well, I'll drive you home, I insist.
00:59:50No, Richard, please.
00:59:51I'd rather go home alone.
00:59:54Taxi!
00:59:56I'll call you in the morning.
00:59:59Thanks.
01:00:11Bobby!
01:00:15Bobby.
01:00:27Bobby!
01:00:30Oh, hi, Nancy.
01:00:32How was the show?
01:00:40Okay!
01:01:00I want everybody in this group over here to be hot.
01:01:02Oh, no!
01:01:03Not you three back there.
01:01:04Yeah, you.
01:01:05You three fellas,
01:01:06you're going to be penises.
01:01:09Let's try it once more,
01:01:10and this time, penises stand erect.
01:01:14All right, that's it for today.
01:01:16Remember, next Thursday, back here,
01:01:18one o'clock, dress rehearsal,
01:01:19and don't forget,
01:01:20the blood clinic this afternoon,
01:01:21in the main building.
01:01:22Be a sport, give a quad.
01:01:39Uh, Nancy?
01:01:46Look, uh,
01:01:48I know you were upset about the other night,
01:01:49but I thought you were interested in Dr. Fields.
01:01:51Bobby, look.
01:01:53Look, the year's just begun,
01:01:55and so far, I have walked in on you and Bambi Malenka twice,
01:01:58and once watching little girls undress
01:02:01in the psychology observation lab.
01:02:03It was just something that we were...
01:02:04Everywhere I go, you're doing something.
01:02:06I don't dare walk into the bathroom
01:02:08for fear I'm going to find you jerking off
01:02:09to a gynecology textbook.
01:02:12I don't want to be your mother, Bobby.
01:02:15I don't always want to be catching you doing something.
01:02:17Do you understand?
01:02:19I'm not mad.
01:02:21I'm just tired of all this nonsense.
01:02:23Look, I'll change.
01:02:25I wish you could,
01:02:26but I'm afraid you'll always see women
01:02:28as nothing more than potential conquests.
01:02:32So, please, just leave me alone.
01:02:35Shit!
01:02:45Come on, don't be a dud.
01:02:46Give some blood.
01:02:47Right over here.
01:02:48Thanks.
01:02:51Right over there.
01:02:52Thank you very much.
01:02:56It's Bobby.
01:02:57He's crazy to give blood.
01:02:59He fainted last year, too.
01:03:05Just relax now.
01:03:06Stay here a minute.
01:03:08I'll take care of him.
01:03:12Hi, Daisy.
01:03:13Are you all right?
01:03:14Yeah, I guess I got a little dizzy.
01:03:16The old fainting pick-up trick.
01:03:19Why did you give blood
01:03:21if you knew you were going to faint?
01:03:24Well, I always...
01:03:26Well, every year I feel that I should...
01:03:28It's...
01:03:32Actually,
01:03:34I wanted you to talk to me.
01:03:37I want to tell you that I'm sorry
01:03:40and that you're really important to me.
01:03:43I mean it.
01:03:47Bobby, you're one crazy guy.
01:03:50I really don't think my leaving will affect the school that much.
01:03:53I'm not a bad biochemistry teacher,
01:03:55but that's not even my specialty.
01:03:56Basically, I'm a researcher.
01:03:58You can replace me.
01:03:59That's not the point.
01:04:00The point is you're black.
01:04:03The faculty, the teachers, the trustees,
01:04:05the equal opportunity people,
01:04:07they love black teachers.
01:04:09Thanks for the compliment.
01:04:10No, no, please.
01:04:11But if somebody doesn't start putting a little more money
01:04:13into the research facilities around here,
01:04:15a lot of your faculty is going to start looking elsewhere.
01:04:17Oh, excuse me.
01:04:18I'm expecting an important call.
01:04:19Yes?
01:04:20The Mayo Clinic returned your call, Dr. Bradley.
01:04:23Yes, Dr. Mayo did have a beard at times during his career.
01:04:29Cliff,
01:04:30the place is a madhouse today.
01:04:32I've got an important meeting.
01:04:33We've got to cut this short.
01:04:34But now, if you have a problem any time,
01:04:36my door is wide open to you.
01:04:40Yes, now,
01:04:41was that early or late in Dr. Mayo's career?
01:04:44They didn't say.
01:04:45But I'm also waiting to hear from the dean's office
01:04:48at Harvard and Yale.
01:04:50Oh, yes, and Howard Pierce is here.
01:05:05Well, what have we got here?
01:05:10Miss Marshall,
01:05:12Miss Marshall,
01:05:13where did you get this?
01:05:15Oh, I found that by my typewriter a couple of weeks ago.
01:05:19Nobody's claimed it, though.
01:05:21Cute, isn't it?
01:05:23Yes.
01:05:24Miss Marshall,
01:05:25has Robert Stevens been in this office
01:05:27for any reason that you know of recently?
01:05:30No, he hasn't.
01:05:32This is Bobby Stevens' stethoscope, sir.
01:05:35Are you sure?
01:05:36Yes, sir.
01:05:37He used to wear it all the time.
01:05:39I got him.
01:05:41I got the SOB.
01:05:42He'll never make a fool of me again.
01:05:50Mr. Stevens,
01:05:51the dean is in a meeting now.
01:05:53Please take a seat.
01:05:55Well, does the dean know I'm a busy man?
01:05:58Well, I'll give him another minute or so.
01:06:02Hi, Howard.
01:06:04I didn't recognize you
01:06:05without your face buried in the dean's ass.
01:06:07How are you?
01:06:08For God's sake,
01:06:09he's a good boy, Gordon.
01:06:10We've got a potential.
01:06:11We need to produce a decent doctor.
01:06:13He's a thorn in my side.
01:06:15A fly in my ointment,
01:06:16a chink in my armor,
01:06:17a cockroach in my suit...
01:06:18Oh, what?
01:06:19Oh, what a...
01:06:20He's a pain in the ass!
01:06:26Yes, Dr. Radley?
01:06:28Mr. Dean, we'll see you now.
01:06:32Time to get off work tonight, dollface.
01:06:36Oh, by the way, Howard,
01:06:37Cindy never did have herpes.
01:06:39What?
01:06:40Don't bother to sit down.
01:06:42This'll only take a minute.
01:06:44Mr. Stevens,
01:06:45I found something of yours.
01:06:48I thought you might want it back.
01:06:51You recognize this?
01:06:53Looks like a stethoscope
01:06:54one might find in a toy doctor's kit.
01:06:57Yes, have you ever seen
01:06:58this particular stethoscope?
01:07:01No, I can't say that I have.
01:07:04Take another look.
01:07:05No, still nothing.
01:07:09Uh, maybe Mr. Pierce can help us out.
01:07:14Pierce?
01:07:15Uh, yes, Dean Bradley.
01:07:18That's Bobby Stevens'
01:07:19toy stethoscope, sir.
01:07:22He used to wear it all the time.
01:07:25Any second-year student
01:07:26can vouch for that, sir.
01:07:27All right.
01:07:28Uh, suppose I tell you
01:07:30that I'm expelling your friend
01:07:31Sam Boon Tong from the school.
01:07:33Sending him back to China
01:07:34with a full report of his activities.
01:07:37Such as sabotaging my reception,
01:07:39breaking into the dean's office,
01:07:41sending a cadaver to the mayor's office
01:07:43in a taxi with Pierce's name
01:07:44pinned to the lapel,
01:07:46impersonating a professor,
01:07:47impersonating a cadaver,
01:07:49making fun of people
01:07:50who donate their bodies.
01:07:51All right.
01:07:52All right.
01:07:54I get your point.
01:07:56What's the deal?
01:07:58See, Pierce, I told you.
01:08:00I told you.
01:08:01See, Pierce, I told you.
01:08:04Everyone has a weak spot.
01:08:07I'll tell you the deal.
01:08:10I want a full confession.
01:08:12And you're gonna write
01:08:13a letter of apology to me,
01:08:15and a letter of apology
01:08:16to the Hamilton Foundation,
01:08:18and then, Mr. Stevens,
01:08:20I never want to see your ass
01:08:23on this campus again.
01:08:26And if I agree to that,
01:08:29Sam Boone Tong stays.
01:08:34Now do you remember?
01:08:37I'm really trying, Dean Bradley.
01:08:39It just doesn't ring a bell.
01:08:41It just doesn't ring a bell.
01:08:46Boone, do you ever get the feeling
01:08:47that maybe you're just
01:08:48wasting your time here?
01:08:49Oh, no.
01:08:50Dean Bradley already put me back
01:08:52one year to catch up.
01:08:54So what are you gonna do
01:08:55if you fail here?
01:08:56Then I must do
01:08:57the honorable thing.
01:09:01It is our way, Bobby.
01:09:03So I must work harder.
01:09:05I cannot afford to waste time.
01:09:07My family depend on me
01:09:08to become skillful doctor.
01:09:12I didn't realize
01:09:13it was this important to you.
01:09:15Oh, very important.
01:09:17There are many,
01:09:18many people in China.
01:09:20We need more technology,
01:09:23more scientists,
01:09:24more physician, more surgeon.
01:09:26We close ourselves off
01:09:27from outside world too long.
01:09:30So I must learn here
01:09:33and go back and teach others
01:09:35so they be fine doctors too.
01:09:37And all I have to worry about
01:09:38is passing physiology.
01:09:42I guess what I meant was,
01:09:44do you think you're learning enough
01:09:45hanging around with a bunch
01:09:46of misfits like us?
01:09:49You know,
01:09:50I'm very surprised
01:09:52at how much I learned at Bradford.
01:09:54The most important thing I learned
01:09:56is that medicine,
01:09:58being good doctor,
01:10:00not only come from here,
01:10:03it's come from here.
01:10:08That's heavy stuff.
01:10:09Where'd you learn that?
01:10:11From you, Bobby.
01:10:18Listen, ship these to me
01:10:19in a couple of days, will you guys?
01:10:20And I'm warning you,
01:10:21I don't want to find any lab specimens
01:10:22tucked in the thighs.
01:10:23Bobby, I don't understand.
01:10:25Why are you leaving?
01:10:27Well, it's like this, Chairman Boone.
01:10:29I just decided that medicine
01:10:30wasn't for me.
01:10:32Come on, Bobby.
01:10:33Don't leave us alone here, man.
01:10:34We'll go crazy.
01:10:35We'll wind up like Howard Pierce.
01:10:37Look, Bobby,
01:10:38most people would sacrifice
01:10:39their next of kin
01:10:40just to get into medical school.
01:10:42You drop out now,
01:10:43you're not getting another chance.
01:10:45You sure you're doing the right thing?
01:10:48Without a doubt.
01:10:50All right, Stephens.
01:10:52What's the real story?
01:10:54Congratulations.
01:10:55I hear you're going to be
01:10:56heading up to the new Kranich Center.
01:10:58Just as soon as the old man dies.
01:11:01I'm sorry it's in this closet.
01:11:03Hey.
01:11:31Hmm.
01:11:34Mr. Hamilton.
01:11:37Mr. Hamilton.
01:11:40I'm not hungry.
01:11:42Mr. Hamilton.
01:11:46Are you my new night nurse?
01:11:50No.
01:11:51I just want to talk to you
01:11:52for a few moments.
01:11:54I know it's crazy
01:11:55busting in on you
01:11:56in the middle of the night like this,
01:11:57but you're the only man
01:11:58who can really help me.
01:11:59You see, Dr. Berman,
01:12:01the assistant dean
01:12:02and a great doctor,
01:12:04said that your friend,
01:12:05Dean Bradley,
01:12:07drew my friend,
01:12:08Bobby Stephens,
01:12:09out of school today
01:12:10for pulling some dumb prank.
01:12:11And I don't think
01:12:12that the medical profession
01:12:13can afford to lose
01:12:14a young man of his caliber.
01:12:18Mr. Hamilton.
01:12:20Mr. Hamilton.
01:12:22Now look,
01:12:23I don't want to tire you out
01:12:24or nothing,
01:12:25but this is very important to me.
01:12:28What's your name?
01:12:31Rob.
01:12:32Oh, that's a cute name for a girl.
01:12:38Mr. Hamilton,
01:12:39I just want to ask you
01:12:40to use your influence
01:12:41on Dean Bradley.
01:12:42Ask him...
01:12:45Mr. Hamilton.
01:12:46Oh, you're a pretty little thing, Ralphie.
01:12:49Why don't you just hop in there
01:12:50and bed next to me and...
01:12:52Mr. Hamilton, I don't...
01:12:54Mr. Hamilton,
01:12:55I don't think you understand.
01:12:56Oh, I understand perfectly.
01:12:57You're everything I want.
01:12:59No, I'm not, Mr. Hamilton.
01:13:01Oh, come to Ozzie, Ralphie.
01:13:03Mr. Hamilton,
01:13:04it's not what you think.
01:13:05Oh, I want you, Ralphie.
01:13:07I want you.
01:13:08But you can't have me.
01:13:09Oh, but I must.
01:13:10I need you.
01:13:11I must have you.
01:13:13Shh.
01:13:14Shh.
01:13:15Oh.
01:13:16Oh.
01:13:17Oh.
01:13:18Oh.
01:13:19Oh.
01:13:20Oh.
01:13:21Oh.
01:13:22Oh.
01:13:23Oh.
01:13:24Oh.
01:13:25Oh.
01:13:27Whoops.
01:13:36Alma, look.
01:13:37It's Mr. Hamilton's room.
01:13:38Oh, my God.
01:13:39His heart stopped.
01:13:45Guard, get that nurse.
01:13:46Dr. Niels, room 203.
01:13:48Dr. Niels, room 203.
01:13:50Dad.
01:13:53Niels is a genius.
01:13:54He'll save him.
01:13:57Turn me off.
01:13:58End of the night.
01:13:59Yes?
01:14:00Bradley?
01:14:01You've got your ceremony.
01:14:02Osgood Hamilton is dead.
01:14:05Are you sure?
01:14:08Yeah.
01:14:09He's a goner.
01:14:11What's going on here?
01:14:12Oh, my God.
01:14:14Get him downstairs and pack him in ice.
01:14:16We've got to lower his body temperature
01:14:17until we freeze him at the ceremony.
01:14:19Oh.
01:14:20Oh.
01:14:21Oh.
01:14:22Oh.
01:14:23Oh.
01:14:24Oh.
01:14:25Oh.
01:14:32Get a couple of orderlies down here
01:14:33to pack up Mr. Hamilton.
01:14:35Yes, ma'am.
01:14:56Whew.
01:14:58Boy, I'm sorry, Mr. Hamilton.
01:15:01Ralphie, my love.
01:15:03I knew you'd come back to me.
01:15:09You were supposed to be dead.
01:15:11Oh, but I can adjust, Ralphie.
01:15:13Really, I really need you to be quiet for a second.
01:15:17Shh.
01:15:18He died peacefully around 1 o'clock this morning.
01:15:20Mr. Hamilton's heart appears to have frozen.
01:15:23Mr. Hamilton's heart appears to have failed
01:15:25shortly after he left his bed
01:15:26to make his way to a small desk
01:15:28to make out checks to a charitable organization.
01:15:31Mr. Hamilton will be frozen at a special ceremony
01:15:33at Brantford Medical School at 2 p.m. today.
01:15:36Ten million dollars will be donated
01:15:38toward the establishment of a cryonics research center
01:15:40in his name.
01:15:41Thank you, gentlemen.
01:15:42Mr. Hamilton, did you have a chance
01:15:43to say goodbye to your father?
01:15:45Mr. Hamilton's body was packed in ice,
01:15:47sealed immediately.
01:15:49I stood by his side.
01:15:50Very end, hoping against hope.
01:15:52No, no, I didn't.
01:15:54No, he didn't.
01:16:12Bobby!
01:16:14Look, I didn't want to go through
01:16:15a mushy goodbye scene.
01:16:16No, no, no, Berman explained everything.
01:16:18And after the ceremony, he's gonna talk
01:16:19to the board of trustees on your behalf.
01:16:21And he thinks that there's a really good chance
01:16:22that you'll be reinstated.
01:16:23Yeah?
01:16:24Yeah.
01:16:25But he wants you to keep your nose
01:16:26absolutely clean,
01:16:28not even a wrong number,
01:16:30and most important,
01:16:32stay away from the dean.
01:16:34Stevens, come on,
01:16:35we got dress rehearsal today.
01:16:37Yeah.
01:16:38No, no, I think that's just the sort of thing
01:16:41that Berman wants Bobby to avoid.
01:16:44I don't believe you two.
01:16:45Where's your sense of responsibility?
01:16:47We got a pageant to put on.
01:16:48Oh, God.
01:16:52Who the hell is that?
01:16:54Ah, some derelict I picked up at the hospital.
01:16:57I'm just taking him for a ride.
01:17:01Nice to meet you.
01:17:13People are crowded in around me
01:17:15as the start of history's first cryonic ceremony
01:17:17is less than a few minutes away.
01:17:19It's beginning to look like a who's who in Brantford
01:17:21down here on the floor
01:17:22of the Gaylord Harper Memorial Auditorium.
01:17:24When the ceremony begins,
01:17:26Mr. Hamilton will be removed from a sealed container
01:17:29and placed into a tank of nitrogen
01:17:31where he will be frozen until such time
01:17:33as medical science finds a way to bring him back.
01:17:37All right, let's get organized here.
01:17:39In one hour, we have to go into the auditorium
01:17:42and put on a show.
01:17:46I don't know about this Bobby thing,
01:17:48I do, don't worry.
01:17:49It's all harmless fun.
01:17:50The dean never shows up at these things anymore.
01:17:52Yeah, what does the dean know about fun?
01:17:54It's good to have you back, pal.
01:17:56It's good to be back.
01:17:57But, don't ever try and take the fall by yourself again.
01:18:00Okay?
01:18:01Okay.
01:18:02We're in this together, right?
01:18:03Right.
01:18:04One for one and all for all.
01:18:06Works for me.
01:18:08Break.
01:18:10Bobby.
01:18:14You're welcome.
01:18:16You're welcome, John.
01:18:20Hey Ralph, bad news.
01:18:22The pageant's off.
01:18:23Hamilton died and they took over the auditorium
01:18:25for his freezing ceremony.
01:18:29Can you believe the old fart picked the day to die?
01:18:32Oh, the old fool.
01:18:34Ruining our ceremony.
01:18:36I am proud to be associated
01:18:39with the loving, generous Hamilton family.
01:18:43Only yesterday, in his hospital room,
01:18:46Osgood and I were sharing a moment together.
01:18:50When he turned to me and he said,
01:18:52Gordy, when I go,
01:18:55don't let them cry for me.
01:18:59Tell them the old man is just taking a few days off
01:19:03gathering strength for the rest of his life.
01:19:08Ladies and gentlemen, Osgood Hamilton will be back.
01:19:12I'll make sure of that.
01:19:21And now, let the ceremony of life begin.
01:19:25Like the mountains and the valleys
01:19:30He will stay with us forever
01:19:35In the tiniest place we know
01:19:39He will stay
01:19:43He will dwell among the angels
01:19:48And we know that he will never
01:19:53Have to leave us when he comes along to stay
01:20:01We will know him when the angels speak his name
01:20:08His name
01:20:10And he'll say he's come to be with us again
01:20:18So let's sell the pain and leave before
01:20:23John!
01:20:35John!
01:20:39John!
01:20:52Get out! Out!
01:20:58Are we having any leaves?
01:20:59Oh yeah, we're having hundreds!
01:21:01Bullshit! Bullshit!
01:21:07Maybe we misjudged Gordy. This looks like fun.
01:21:32Ha, ha, ha!
01:21:53Have I offended Hamilton?
01:22:02No!
01:22:10Steve!
01:22:13I'm back.
01:22:16You're in big trouble.
01:22:18Yeah!
01:22:31Woo!
01:22:36Parents were broken, you're left!
01:22:37You're right!
01:22:38The schoolboy got away, I was left!
01:22:39You're right!
01:22:40What's left?
01:22:41You're right!
01:22:42What's left?
01:22:43You're right!
01:22:44You're left!
01:22:45Right! Left!
01:22:46You're right!
01:22:47If I was a plastic surgeon, I would make my girl a virgin!
01:22:49You're right!
01:22:50What's left?
01:22:51You guys were really lucky this time.
01:22:53I think twice about ruining my medical career over practical jokes.
01:22:57You know, Nancy's right.
01:22:58A lot of good people went out on a limb to help us here today.
01:23:00And being a doctor is a big responsibility.
01:23:02So before we think about pulling any more irresponsible pranks,
01:23:05we better consider the consequences.
01:23:07You're right, Bobby.
01:23:08I guess we've been a little, uh, selfish.
01:23:10Uh-huh, pretty selfish.
01:23:12Hey, I'm proud of you guys.
01:23:14So what do you say we pull ourselves together,
01:23:16straighten up, and fly right?
01:23:18Put our noses to the grindstone.
01:23:19Yeah, apply a little elbow grease.
01:23:21Ship up or shape out.
01:23:23Whatever.
01:23:24So what do you say, guys?
01:23:26Nah!
01:23:57One down, one left to go
01:23:59You push the needle to the red
01:24:02Red light's burnin'
01:24:04No one's slowin' you down
01:24:08Take off, leave me behind
01:24:10I hope you come out on ahead
01:24:13Call this heaven
01:24:15No one's bringin' you round
01:24:19Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
01:24:22It's all in the game
01:24:25Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
01:24:36Anywhere that you look, see right through me
01:24:39Where do we go from here?
01:24:42Can't hear the rhyme and can't see the reason
01:24:45Where do we go from here?
01:24:48One down, one left to go
01:24:50You push the needle to the red
01:24:53Red light's burnin'
01:24:55No one's slowin' you down
01:24:59Take off, leave me behind
01:25:01I hope you come out on ahead
01:25:04Call this heaven
01:25:06No one's bringin' you round
01:25:10Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
01:25:13It's all in the game
01:25:16Sometimes you don't, sometimes you do
01:25:19It's always the same
01:25:21Sometimes you're right, sometimes you're wrong
01:25:24There's no one to blame
01:25:27Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
01:25:44One down, one left to go
01:25:46You push the needle to the red
01:25:50Red light's burnin'
01:25:52No one's slowin' you down
01:25:56Take off, leave me behind
01:25:58I hope you come out on ahead
01:26:01Call this heaven
01:26:03No one's bringin' you round
01:26:07Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
01:26:10It's all in the game
01:26:13Sometimes you don't, sometimes you do
01:26:16It's always the same
01:26:18Sometimes you're right, sometimes you're wrong
01:26:21There's no one to blame
01:26:24Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose
01:26:29Sometimes
01:26:35I said you're gonna win
01:26:37You're gonna win
01:26:39You're gonna win
01:26:43You're gonna win