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00:00I was introduced to you with Chasing Summer.
00:03How do you relate to the person who created that album?
00:06Oh man, still the same guy. A little older, a little wiser.
00:11You know, a little more seasoned, a little more experienced.
00:14I look back at the version of the person I was when I was writing Chasing Summer
00:17and I'm extremely sad for that guy.
00:22You know, he was going through a lot and nobody knew.
00:26He looks at me and smiles because he knows he has something to look forward to.
00:31You know, and there's just been so much growth through pain and through, you know, work.
00:37And, you know, I'm proud of both sirs because, you know, without one there wouldn't be the other.
00:42As always. It always has to come with that balance, right?
00:45It does.
00:46How do you relate and how do you emote when you're on that stage knowing that that was a past self?
00:51Like, how do you try to attach new memories to those tracks?
00:55You know, it's the same way I perform the heavy songs because you've got to think,
00:58I wrote these songs and, you know, performing them now, they're two, three-year-old songs.
01:03Some of them are eight-year-old songs, you know what I mean, that I just decided to put out.
01:07So, you know, it's the same with every performance.
01:11All I'm trying to do is be present, you know what I mean?
01:13Because every song deserves its, you know, respect.
01:17So I try to be present through the whole set, which is a very difficult thing to do
01:20and a very daunting task, especially how emotional some of these songs make me, you know.
01:26But I think I've gotten good at it.
01:28The first few shows I broke down, you know, even today was kind of like at the end of the set,
01:31I was like losing it, you know what I mean?
01:33I'm an emotional wreck after all of this trauma.
01:36Yeah, you're going through it all.
01:37You're like, you're literally meeting all yourselves.
01:39You're like, hey, come with me for this song.
01:41And this one too.
01:42And let me put you down because I've got to pick this one up.
01:44Man, a few of the songs I don't even like performing, but I have to because they're fan favorites.
01:49You know, they're versions of myself I definitely don't want to let out.
01:53You know what I mean?
01:54But we won't say what songs.
01:55I really want to know though.
01:57Ah, can you guess?
01:58I don't know.
02:00That's the thing.
02:01What song do you think I just hate to perform because it puts me in a place that I don't want to be?
02:08Well, I think in order for me to answer that, I would have to reveal a lot about myself.
02:12Same.
02:13So you know what I mean?
02:15All right, so I'm Mary.
02:16Yeah.
02:17I'm Sir.
02:18Yeah.
02:19Made some mistakes.
02:21What song would be the worst song for me to sing?
02:24I mean, dream girl, like John record.
02:28John record.
02:29No, because that's that's that's a very introspective song.
02:32That's why I love you.
02:33Let's just start there.
02:35Yeah.
02:36OK, that's the one that hits a little bit sonically.
02:39Amazing.
02:40Beautiful.
02:41Feature wise.
02:42Amazing.
02:43Right.
02:44Lyrically.
02:45Not the song I want to be singing.
02:47Yeah.
02:48How do you then?
02:49How do you do it?
02:50Because that's the song that we were like, sir, thank you, because you really did.
02:54You kind of gave us the words and we didn't have it.
02:57We had to confront ourselves.
02:58Oh, yeah.
02:59And thinking about heavy.
03:00Right.
03:01When did you know that you were making this album?
03:04Did you set out to make it?
03:05Did you start with a couple of tracks, take a few steps back?
03:09How did this heavy process come about?
03:12Sheesh.
03:13Heavy is like probably three years old with a few new records that we added as we got
03:19healthy.
03:20But, yeah, I started that playlist in the depths of my addiction, in the depths of depression
03:27and in one of the worst places, which is funny because some of the best records, man, came
03:33from that.
03:34You know, but as I healed, as I set myself aside to heal and focus on myself and my family,
03:41I started to see a through line of light at the end of the tunnel.
03:46But so much darkness.
03:47So, you know, the playlist was kind of creating itself as I was recreating myself.
03:53And, you know, I looked up and we had too many songs.
03:57So, you know, heavy is definitely a labor of love.
03:59But it's it's my it's my life in a nutshell for the last like three years.
04:06You know what I mean?
04:08And it's it's a beautiful like victory for me.
04:12I'm not worried about like what it's selling.
04:14I'm not worried about how it looks to people.
04:16I mean, I survive.
04:18I've survived those lyrics.
04:19I survived that.
04:20That's like really neat.
04:21I really have.
04:22And, you know, this is for me.
04:26I love that I have fans that listen to it and again can, you know, understand what's
04:30going on and feel for me.
04:33But literally for me, you know what I mean?
04:35And I thank God for this one for sure.
04:37So when this album was over, were you like, OK, I'm going to give it away?
04:41Or how what was the process of being ready to release it?
04:44Because it took a little minute.
04:45It took a while.
04:46No, no, no. It was.
04:48Oh, man, it was me.
04:49It was me being healthy.
04:50You know, we definitely were sitting on this in 2023.
04:53We started to drop our last single.
04:55And, you know, I just relapsed at a horrible relapse and it set me back.
05:01You know, and I had to really, you know, really know that I was ready.
05:08You know, I had to know that I was ready.
05:10Everybody else around me was doing everything they could to help me get healthy.
05:13But I had to decide that I wanted to be healthy.
05:15So this is my proof.
05:19That's that's love.
05:21Yeah, I had to decide I wanted to be healthy.
05:24And I had to decide that, you know, I was ready to share this message.
05:29And, you know, it took a while.
05:31But I just thank God for top people like him.
05:34You know, he definitely did everything he could to, like, be patient with me
05:38and give me all the time I needed.
05:40And, you know, my wife, my family,
05:43I got to be thankful to them for just supporting me the way they do.
05:47You know what I mean?
05:48I wouldn't be able to be where I am today without, you know, my family,
05:51my mom, my family, my wife.
05:54You have a lot of family around you, and that's one.
05:56We just saw some.
05:57We saw your crew, right?
05:58You have the people who are with you on this tour day in and day out.
06:02You've got your musical family.
06:04You've got TV, right?
06:07TV is on fire right now.
06:09Every single one of y'all is just like firing on all cylinders.
06:14And it's something that's really impressive to see coming from from a
06:17roster.
06:18You mentioned top being such a supporter.
06:20What is something that you've learned from through your label mates that
06:25you've maybe learned through them that you wanted to incorporate into your
06:28practice as you've come into heavy?
06:30Oh, man.
06:31I mean, for the next project, I'm just going back to the basics.
06:34Hustle like I'm broke.
06:35You know what I mean?
06:36Like no matter what I've accomplished,
06:37I need to focus on what's next and I need to dig down and like really start
06:40writing some songs.
06:41You know,
06:42I've been working so much on touring and everything that I haven't had time
06:44to like really do what I love most.
06:46So, you know, I'm just going back to the basics,
06:48going to the studio, sitting down, shutting up.
06:50Y'all ain't gonna see me for a year.
06:52And then all of a sudden it's gonna be music video after music video.
06:54We drop it and we ready to go.
06:56Well, I'm ready for that.
06:57Yeah, for sure.
06:58I'm not.
06:59I will never be gone five years.
07:01I'm not that type of artist.
07:02I should have never been gone that long in the first place.
07:05You know what I mean?
07:06So I got points to prove now.
07:07No.
07:08So, yeah, I'm excited about the future.
07:10So that reminds me of you did an interview with Rolling Stones,
07:13Megan Jordan,
07:14and you talked about how obviously through your journey of recovery,
07:19using music as a diary of sorts.
07:22As you're on this tour,
07:23do you jot notes about things that you're going through?
07:26Do you keep it until you have that year where you get to sit back and process?
07:30Or how's your process?
07:32My process is pretty archaic, honestly.
07:37I'm like, send me beats.
07:39I got a folder of beats.
07:41And I just,
07:42I literally just wait until it's time for me to get in the studio and I'll
07:45pull up my folder of beats.
07:46I'm simple.
07:47Or I make a beat or I start a piano.
07:49You know what I mean?
07:50Those kinds of like, I'm that kind of simple.
07:52Where the, the, the, the lyrics will be based off of the feeling.
07:56I get the color that I hear.
07:58Right.
07:59In the music.
08:00You know what I mean?
08:01You know.
08:02The color that you hear.
08:03Yeah.
08:04What color do you feel like right now?
08:06What's the color of sir.
08:08Today.
08:09I'm very.
08:12I'm like a deep dark blue.
08:17Why deep dark blue?
08:18It's a lot going on outside of music.
08:20Yeah.
08:21Yeah.
08:22But like almost a little purple.
08:25You know what I mean?
08:26The darkest of blues.
08:27Like a midnight.
08:28Midnight blue.
08:29Midnight blue is what we're feeling.
08:31I mean,
08:32I love that you can say that and still say it with a smile because even
08:36though it's hard,
08:37You're still showing up in your ear.
08:39I have no choice.
08:40That part.
08:42Yeah.
08:43Well, thank you so much for sitting down with us.
08:46This was wonderful.
08:47This was great.
08:48I really appreciate this conversation.
08:49I really appreciate it too.