What is happening with our Muslim youth and their confidence? What about their identity? Are Muslim parents doing the best job? How can we protect our children and raise a righteous generation?
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00:00The
00:26topic that I've been given to talk about is something that is not easy to discuss.
00:31It's something that is actually, as we get further and further into the building of the
00:35Islamic communities in the Western world, we come to understand that there are certain
00:40unique challenges that are specific to the era in which we live in.
00:45When you look at the challenges of previous generations, my parents' generation who came
00:50to this country, my mother was an Egyptian immigrant, my father was a convert to Islam,
00:54but my mother's generation who came to this country, or Sheikh Abdel Nasser Janda's parents'
00:58generation who came to this country, it's very interesting to see the needs of that
01:02generation versus the needs of the younger generation today.
01:06When you look at some of the needs of the previous generations, you have things like
01:10they were coming here for the sake of getting educated.
01:12They were coming to this part of the world because education, the institutions, universities,
01:17colleges, were a little bit better suited for them to acquire their degrees that they
01:22were seeking.
01:23As a result of coming to this country for the purpose of education, for the purpose
01:27of work and employment, they came to a place, and if you walk outside and you'll see the
01:34display that IKNA has set up where they have the first masjid in Canada, or one of the
01:38first masajid in Canada, this was actually a very legitimate concern when it came to
01:45the previous generation and their mission in life.
01:48Where are we going to pray?
01:51Where are we going to gather to come together to pray?
01:54For us, for the younger generation in Toronto or in the Western world today, our concern
02:00is not where to pray, but it's where to eat.
02:03Which halal restaurant are we going to go to?
02:05Which Nando's are we going to go to?
02:08This is such an incredible difference in priority.
02:11It's such an incredible difference in need that Sheikh Abdel Nasser would tell us stories
02:16about he remembers being a kid in Dallas, Texas.
02:20And everyone hears about Dallas, Texas these days, that mashallah Sheikh Omar is there
02:24and Sheikh Yasser Brijes is there and Sheikh Abdel Nasser is there and there's so much
02:28going on.
02:29Everyone hears about this big booming community in Dallas when Sheikh Abdel Nasser, when he
02:33tells me about his childhood, that they used to wait on Friday morning.
02:38They used to wait by the phone, and not these phones, okay, they used to wait by a phone
02:43with a cord.
02:45I know you young people don't know what a cord is, right?
02:48So a cord is something that connects two things, right?
02:51So they used to wait by the phone for what on Friday mornings?
02:54What's the day of Friday?
02:55What do we do on Fridays?
02:57Yeah, Jummah, right?
02:59They used to wait by the phone for a phone call from one of the brothers or the uncles
03:04in the community saying, we have a place to pray Jummah today.
03:09We show up to this room, in this community center, in this corner, we've rented it for
03:1415, 20, 30 minutes, please come on this time, quickly we'll pray and then we'll leave.
03:19This was the state of their masjid, this was the state of their Jummah prayer.
03:24It's remarkable.
03:25And then they graduated, he tells me these stories, and I remember even my own development,
03:30my first masjid growing up was, used to be an old car garage, used to be an old auto
03:35body workshop.
03:36I remember the doors for the masjid were those big garage doors, right?
03:40And so sheikh would tell me that then they started renting out small spaces, 500 square
03:44feet, a thousand square feet in these little retail centers.
03:50So in between a subway and a gas station was masjid, right?
03:55And this is where they used to pray.
03:57And then there was the Sunday school.
03:58How many students?
03:59One, you.
04:00Who was the teacher?
04:01Your mom, right?
04:03And that was the Sunday school.
04:05And then your cousin showed up, right?
04:08And then someone else moved to Dallas.
04:10This was how communities grew.
04:12And this was from the 80s into the 90s, you saw this very slow trickle of community building.
04:20And so the concerns of conviction, the concerns that we have today, it's not that they didn't
04:25exist back then, but you know, Abraham Maslow, he has a hierarchy of needs, right?
04:31What are our needs?
04:32And at the very bottom, we have things like oxygen, food, right?
04:36These are things that we need in order to survive.
04:38And then once we can breathe and once we can eat, then we're concerned about things like
04:42safety, right?
04:43Then we're concerned about things like temperature, warmth, cold, friends.
04:48Then we develop these higher level concerns, like social concerns, right?
04:53So the community was so concerned on being able to breathe and eat, have a place to pray,
04:58have a place to learn one day a week, that some of these deeper concerns that we see
05:03today, like seeking of Islamic knowledge, like having Islamic social spaces, like having
05:09Islamic art spaces where people who are artists and Muslims can share and grow together.
05:15It's not that they didn't exist, but they just weren't highlighted because why?
05:18We were still looking for bread.
05:21We were still looking for water, right?
05:24So now we see if you fast forward 15, 20 years, the concerns that we have are radically different.
05:32And this is a message that I think especially our beloved elders need to hear is that we
05:40deeply as young people appreciate the work that you have done to establish for us a place
05:45to be Muslim.
05:48I don't know.
05:49I do not know.
05:51If I were the one who was sent to North America in 1970 as a 20-year-old college student,
05:57I don't know if the first thing on my mind would be, I have to get a place to pray.
06:03The fact that our elders did that, it deserves our appreciation.
06:06We should make dua for them every day.
06:08But at the same time that we appreciate that, we need to understand and appreciate that
06:13there are new concerns that are actually really heavily weighing upon our community.
06:21You know, one of the things that we don't talk about in our community today, one of
06:26the concerns that's very much in the forefront is the level of crisis of doubt of faith that
06:32we have within our community.
06:35That people who are born Muslim, who are raised Muslim, who have gone through the entire Muslim
06:42curriculum of Sunday school, of weekend courses, of Jummah prayers, of Ramadan after Ramadan,
06:49have maybe even done an umrah or a hajj with their family, that when they turn 18 or 24
06:55or 26, once the familial obligation of religion has been lifted from them, now it becomes
07:01an independent choice.
07:03It's not a matter of being someone's son or daughter or brother or sister.
07:07Now it's my decision, then we shed that religion and we leave it behind us.
07:13Because we develop this resentful relationship towards it.
07:17And a lot of people in the audience right now are nodding their heads because this is
07:20something that is becoming more and more apparent and it's something that if you think about
07:23your own life and your own relationships, many of us, if not all of us, know or are
07:29related to or have a friend or maybe ourselves have been through or are going through the
07:35issue of reconciling whether or not we actually believe in this thing called Islam.
07:40And I know that to some of us that's shocking to hear that statement, do we believe in Islam?
07:45But we have to first understand that that is a legitimate question that our community
07:49is facing.
07:51And so as with any question that is so full of emotion and so full of crisis, you can
07:58imagine that when a 20-year-old son goes to his father or a 20-year-old daughter goes
08:04to her father or they go to their mother and that father or mother, their only concern
08:10in their life that they can remember was trying to have that place for Jummah on Friday.
08:16You can understand the shock when they hear their children or the young people in their
08:21community say, I don't know if I want to be Muslim anymore.
08:25You can understand, it's hard to fathom that gap because why?
08:29The elder generation says what?
08:31We worked so hard.
08:34We worked so hard.
08:36Like you just had halal Thai food in Canada, right?
08:43As a result of the hard work that we've done to build masjids and institutions and make
08:47Muslims mainstream and halal meat providers, you know, I was driving one of these roads,
08:52I gave khutbah yesterday at the Isna Masjid and we were driving and it seemed like there
08:56were more halal meat stores than gas stations.
08:59It was amazing.
09:00I was like, is this Jannah, right?
09:01I was like, am I in paradise, have I died, you know?
09:05The elder generation worked so hard to build what we call Muslim infrastructure, places
09:10to pray, places to eat, places to benefit from being Muslim and have Muslim amenities.
09:16But now we're coming to the conversation of what we call heartwork, which is we have the
09:23infrastructure around us, but what about the structures inside of us?
09:27And these are sometimes the questions that we really struggle to answer because we've
09:31been so fixated on trying to provide buildings and structures and rooms and make sure that
09:36our masjids look beautiful and that they're big enough to have a big Eid prayer and that
09:40we can have a nice full Jummah.
09:42But sometimes we can't even answer the most basic questions to our young people like,
09:46why should I believe in God?
09:48Why does God matter?
09:50This man, Muhammad Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam, why is it so important to know him?
09:55These are the questions that, you know, besides all of the big halls and nice food and everything,
10:01these are the questions that are really going to resonate, that are going to carry this
10:04generation forward.
10:06And so there are three things that we learn on how to have these conversations about building
10:12conviction.
10:13And by the way, I myself am a father.
10:15My wife and I have a son named Musa.
10:18He's 20 months old, right?
10:20He's one and a half years old.
10:22He's already a teenager.
10:23He talks back.
10:24You know, we'll put on Baby Shark on TV and he goes, not this, not this, right?
10:30And I kid you not, especially for people who are in the audience who are like 16 to 30,
10:36maybe you don't have kids, I want you to understand something, that this fear of raising children
10:43and having them love Allah and his messenger is a very legitimate fear.
10:48That sometimes we think that our parents are being a little bit dramatic.
10:52Why are you so worried about me praying?
10:54Why are you so worried about this?
10:55Why are you so worried?
10:56Don't worry, I'm Muslim.
10:58But whenever your kids are like as old as Musa, you start to have these really serious
11:04thoughts about what if my son, who I've named after a prophet of Allah, the most mentioned
11:11prophet in the Quran, what if he doesn't, what if he grows up not loving Allah?
11:17Who's responsible for that?
11:19And I have sleepless nights where I toss and turn.
11:23My wife and I have entire conversations where we just ask Allah to protect him and we ask
11:28Allah to make us good parents so that he grows up loving Allah.
11:32It's a big concern that parents have.
11:34So there are three things that Shaykh and I have talked about over the course of weeks
11:38and months of having these discussions.
11:41What can we do as communities, as families, to nurture this appreciation?
11:48Because what is conviction?
11:50Conviction is a fancy word for a person having certainty in something.
11:53And when does a person have certainty in something?
11:56When they know that they need it.
11:58So what can we do as communities to instill this absolute and deep appreciation of Allah
12:06and his messenger within ourselves and within our families?
12:10The first thing is actually very beautiful.
12:12And that is that we have to work on our communication.
12:16We absolutely have to work on the skill.
12:19It's not a given.
12:20It's not a right.
12:21It is a skill that must be developed.
12:25Like a jump shot.
12:26Sorry, we're in Canada.
12:27You guys don't know what basketball is.
12:28I'm joking.
12:29I'm joking.
12:30All right.
12:31Kawhi Leonard.
12:32I understand.
12:33Okay.
12:34It's like a slap shot in hockey.
12:35Okay.
12:36Right.
12:37It's like a jump shot.
12:38It's a skill that must be developed.
12:40You know, how many of us, raise your hand, if you were ever, if someone ever tried to
12:45explain something to you, and they said, you asked them why?
12:51And they said, just because.
12:53Because I said so.
12:54Anybody?
12:55Okay.
12:56You teenagers are not being honest.
12:58I know your parents have said this to you, right?
13:01Okay.
13:02Number one.
13:03They said, just because.
13:04Raise your hand if someone has ever tried to explain something to you, and you understood
13:09what they were saying, and you actually thought they were right, but the way they were doing
13:13it, you could not accept it.
13:15This happens in arguments all the time.
13:17I'll be arguing with somebody, right?
13:19And what they're saying, I get it.
13:22The point they're trying to make, I understand it.
13:24But the way they're saying it is so bad, is so hurtful, is so destructive, that the way
13:32they're saying it makes me never want to agree with them.
13:36That is called communication.
13:40Communication is not about the point that you're making, but it's about how you're making
13:44that point.
13:45So, for example, is it really that crazy to believe that there is one God?
13:50No.
13:51Absolutely not.
13:52Is it really that far-fetched and outlandish to believe that there is one God?
13:56No.
13:57But the problem when we talk about nurturing conviction within ourselves and families is
14:01not the content, it's not the substance of the message, but it's how we deliver it.
14:07And this is why yesterday, how many of you were at Jummah yesterday at Isna?
14:11How many of you were at Jummah yesterday, period?
14:13Okay, mashallah.
14:14I was kind of concerned by that first question, right?
14:17Okay?
14:18But I realize there's more masajid in Toronto, okay?
14:21That's why the khutbah that I gave yesterday, there was a very interesting point that I
14:25want all of us never to forget.
14:26The Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, many, many, many, many people disagreed with
14:31him in what he was saying.
14:33Yes or no?
14:34Abu Jahl.
14:35Did he agree with the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam?
14:37Abu Lahab.
14:38Did he agree with the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam?
14:39No.
14:40There were many people in Quraysh who said, I do not agree with what you are saying.
14:45But do we have one narration where Abu Lahab or Abu Jahl or any of the people who disagreed
14:51with what he was saying, do we have one record of them saying, you know, he's right, but
14:57I just can't stand talking to that guy.
15:01Do we have one narration where they say, I don't like the way he's talking to me?
15:07No.
15:08Do we have a single narration where the people who made the Prophet their enemy, were they
15:13ever criticized his communication skills, ever?
15:17What does that show us?
15:19There are many people who don't believe in the truth because of how it was delivered
15:24to them.
15:25And there are many people who believe in falsehood because of how it was delivered to them.
15:28I mean, if you look at, subhanallah, if you look at, when I talk to young Muslims, especially
15:35those who become Christian, they convert to Christianity.
15:39There are some Christians, there are some Muslims who converted to Christianity that
15:41I know whose parents were Christians who converted to Islam.
15:47So I want you to think about this.
15:48The dad accepted Islam from Christianity, and the child became Christian after being
15:54born Muslim.
15:55And when I talk to the child, you know, we have conversations about theology.
15:59Because a lot of times we're like, let's talk about the Bible.
16:02So we start having conversations, and we both come to the conclusion, this newly converted
16:07Christian, former Muslim, we both come to the conclusion of what?
16:10We say what?
16:11Well, do you agree that there are some big questions about, you know, scriptural accuracy
16:17and historical accuracy that simply cannot be answered by the Christian tradition?
16:22And they say, yes, but the people there are so nice.
16:27And you know what?
16:29That's the end of the conversation.
16:31It shows us sometimes that we put so much emphasis on the haq, being right, what is
16:36correct, and we put very little emphasis on wa innaka la'ala khuluqin azeem.
16:42And you are, as the Prophet ﷺ was described by Allah, you are on top of good character.
16:48You own it.
16:49You are the one who is good character.
16:52It belongs to you.
16:54So when we talk about this conversation of conviction in our families, the first question
16:59we have to ask is, am I somebody who my family even wants to talk to?
17:06You know, sometimes young people come to me and they say, I started learning my deen,
17:09I started learning my religion, and I want to talk to my parents more because there are
17:14some things that are very, very wrong that they're doing, right?
17:17There are some things that are all culture, not Islam.
17:21You know, I want to get married, and my parents want me to have this big wedding, and they
17:24want me to ride an elephant into the hall, and they want to take these dollar bills and
17:27these rupees and wring it around my face, right?
17:31And I just want all Islam, no culture, man.
17:33There's no culture in Islam, which is, by the way, not a true statement.
17:36But anyways, you know, these people get really like worked up.
17:40And they say, and I say, okay, have you ever tried to have a conversation with them about
17:43how you want your wedding to be or who you want to marry or where you want to go to school?
17:47You name the topic, right?
17:49What you want to major in?
17:50My parents want me to be a doctor.
17:51Okay, what do you want to be?
17:52Not a doctor, right?
17:56No one's laughing because all the parents are like, oh, no, I don't like where this
17:58is going.
17:59Inshallah, I'll be a doctor if Allah wants me to be a doctor, inshallah, right?
18:03Some parents are like, I mean.
18:06And I ask the young people, I say, so how did you approach your parents?
18:10They say, well, my dad came home, and when he came home, he looked really tired, but
18:14I said, no, you know what?
18:15We have to talk right now.
18:16I said, I know you want me to be a doctor, but I don't want to be a doctor.
18:20I want to be a wrestler, right?
18:22Like you're something, right?
18:24And he goes, my dad got really upset.
18:26I said, well, why do you think that's the case?
18:28He said, I don't know.
18:30I said, do you think maybe you could have picked a better time?
18:32Do you think maybe you approached him in a very aggressive way?
18:35Do you think maybe you could have come to him softer?
18:37Do you think maybe there was some wisdom in waiting a little bit?
18:40Yeah, but it doesn't matter.
18:41We have to have these conversations, tough conversations right now.
18:44The truth is the truth.
18:45It doesn't matter.
18:46No, that's not the case at all.
18:48That's not the case at all.
18:50So you've been in an argument.
18:51What's the most frustrating thing in an argument?
18:55What is the most frustrating thing in an argument?
18:59It's when they win, right?
19:00No, I'm joking.
19:01Right?
19:02What is it?
19:03Yes.
19:04Okay.
19:06It's when they criticize your idea.
19:07That's pretty frustrating, right?
19:09But you're still actually way ahead of most people.
19:12At least they're hearing your idea.
19:15What's even more frustrating than having somebody criticize your idea?
19:20They don't want you to talk.
19:22They're not even listening to you.
19:24You know when the Prophet ﷺ used to recite Qur'an, what did the Quraysh used to do sometimes?
19:30They used to plug their ears.
19:32The most frustrating thing in any conversation is when you feel like the people you're talking
19:36to are not what?
19:38You're not even listening to me.
19:40You don't even care about what I have to say.
19:42You're not even hearing my concerns.
19:45You're not even giving me a chance.
19:48That's the most frustrating thing.
19:50You know what's beautiful about the Qur'an, subhanAllah, is that it tells us stories and
19:54in these stories there are so many lessons.
19:58There's a story of Ibrahim ﷺ.
20:00Ibrahim, Abul Anbiya, the father of the Prophets.
20:02Ibrahim ﷺ, he had a son Ismail and this son, this very dear son, he deeply, deeply
20:10wanted a child, wanted a son.
20:12Allah ﷻ granted him and his wife Hajar ﷺ.
20:16He granted them a son and, you know, he had to spend a long time away from them.
20:22He dropped them off in the valley of Mecca, right, where there was no water, no vegetation.
20:27He left them there.
20:28Then he came back.
20:30Then they did things together like father-son activities, like spent time together.
20:35They built the Kaaba together.
20:36Could you imagine that kind of Saturday?
20:38You wake up.
20:39You're like, hey dad, what are we going to do?
20:40He's like, we're building the Kaaba today, right?
20:42Imagine like that kind of father-son bonding, right?
20:45I remember the bonding of playing sports with my dad growing up.
20:49Could you imagine?
20:50And my bond with my dad is very close because of those memories we have together.
20:54Could you imagine the bond of you and your dad building the Kaaba together or building
20:58a masjid together?
21:00How beautiful that bond would be?
21:02So the Prophet Ibrahim loved his son Ismail very much, very much.
21:07And Allah even described Ismail as a beautiful son, like a good kid, right?
21:14The kind of son that every dad wants to have.
21:18And then Ibrahim one night has a dream.
21:22And we know that the dreams of prophets are wahi, the revelation from Allah.
21:27It's one of the ways in which Allah communicates with prophets.
21:30Sometimes he sends angels.
21:32Sometimes he communicates with them through their dreams.
21:35And he says,
21:36إني أرى في المنام أني أذبحك
21:39He says, oh my son, I saw in my dream that I have to slaughter you.
21:46I want you to understand the difficulty of him saying that statement.
21:51Why?
21:52There's a couple reasons.
21:53Number one, he loves his son.
21:55There's no parent ever wants to ever do any harm to their children.
22:02I know that a lot of children here are like, are you sure?
22:04Yes, I'm sure, right?
22:06No parent has ever wanted to do a single ounce of harm to their children ever, ever.
22:13But Ibrahim is being commanded by Allah.
22:16The second thing is that wahi is non-negotiable, meaning this isn't a matter in which Ibrahim
22:22can negotiate with Allah.
22:24Oh Allah, I know you want me to slaughter him, but can I just slaughter this sheep instead?
22:29Can I just slaughter this animal instead?
22:31Can I just substitute my, I love my son.
22:33Can I substitute him with somebody else?
22:35This is wahi from Allah.
22:36It's revelation from Allah and he's a prophet.
22:39He's been given this mission, this job to obey the revelation from Allah and to teach
22:43people this message from Allah.
22:47So he goes to his son and he says to his son,
22:50إني أرى في المنام أني أذبحك
22:53I see that in my dream I have to slaughter you.
22:56And then he says something profound.
22:58And this is the first lesson.
22:59Everyone ready for the first lesson?
23:00How to build conviction.
23:01How to build community conviction, family conviction.
23:04How to build communication.
23:06You have to value the voice of the person you're talking to.
23:10You have to shut your mouth sometimes and open your ears and you have to listen and
23:15actually care about what they're saying.
23:19He says, فانظر ماذا ترى
23:22In a situation where it is irrelevant what Ismail's opinion is.
23:28When Allah has given a command, the command must be followed.
23:32That is the truth.
23:33That is the haq.
23:35He is a prophet who has been given a command.
23:37There is no discussion, okay?
23:41In that moment, Ibrahim asks his son, فانظر ماذا ترى
23:49Tell me how you feel.
23:52Tell me how you feel.
23:54I want to know how you feel.
23:58He says to his son in a moment where how his son feels is not going to change a single
24:04thing.
24:05Tell me how you feel.
24:07Fathers, mothers, this is a big lesson.
24:13A lot of us, we walk around and say that we're doing things for our kids because we have
24:18to.
24:19But we don't do the second thing, which is listening to our kids because we should.
24:25And it doesn't matter if how our kids feel or the opinion they have about what's going
24:29on is going to impact the trajectory of our decision.
24:33It doesn't matter.
24:34What matters is that our kids know that when they talk, their voices are heard.
24:40What matters is when people communicate, they feel like we listen to them.
24:44This is a prophetic trait.
24:45It's a prophetic characteristic.
24:47The Prophet ﷺ was one of the best listeners, that when people would come to him and talk,
24:53he would not shut them down.
24:55He would not interrupt them.
24:57He would listen to what they were saying and let them know that your voice is important.
25:03Your opinion, even if it's not completely accurate, I value the fact that you feel a
25:10certain way.
25:11And what does Isma'il do?
25:12Isma'il says,
25:13يَا أَبَتِي اِفْعَلْ مَا تُؤْمَرُ
25:14O my father, do what you've been commanded.
25:18سَتَجِجُنِي إِنْشَاءَ اللَّهَ مِنَ الصَّابِدِينَ
25:21You will find me, God willing, from amongst those who have patience.
25:25If you value the voice of your children, or your family, or your spouse, you will find
25:32that when you value their voice, their voice will impress you.
25:36It will surprise you.
25:37It will give you that tranquility.
25:39Isma'il doesn't say,
25:40O my dad, this is crazy.
25:41I have to leave.
25:42O dad, this is why.
25:43I knew that something was wrong.
25:46He said,
25:47Dad, do what you've been commanded.
25:49He trusted his son, and his son delivered on his trust.
25:53This is a very important lesson in communication.
25:56The second lesson that we'll give, because I only have five minutes left, I know that
26:00I talk too long.
26:01I apologize.
26:02I should have cut the Nando story down a little bit, but wallahi, when the heart loves something,
26:05you can't stop talking about it, right?
26:08So the second point that I want us to understand as parents, especially with younger generation,
26:13or anybody really, scholars, imams, dua, whoever, it is okay to admit when you don't
26:21know something.
26:23It is okay to admit that I don't know.
26:27If my son comes to me and says, why do we have to do this in Islam, and I don't know
26:33the answer, it is okay for me to say, you know what?
26:37I've never thought about that.
26:39I've never had that question.
26:41That's a really good question.
26:43You know, the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam one time was asked a question, Allah tells
26:46us in the Quran, they ask you about the soul.
26:52So people were asking the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam, okay, you're telling us
26:55that there's this thing called the soul.
26:57We know that we have bodies.
26:58We know that we have limbs and organs.
27:00We know that.
27:01But you're telling us there's this hidden, invisible thing inside of us called the soul,
27:06and that that soul is what?
27:08Your Quran is telling us that it has these different states and these different things,
27:16but what is this soul?
27:17What is it?
27:18Tell us more.
27:19Allah tells the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam as a response, that this rooh that
27:31you're asking about, it is from the affair, the matter, the knowledge of my Lord.
27:38And we have not been given a lot of knowledge about it, except for a very tiny bit.
27:46We have not been given a lot of information about this soul.
27:48This is the Prophet of God telling people who are challenging and asking him, what about
27:54the soul?
27:55This is him saying, I'm the Prophet and I don't know.
27:59If the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam is supposed to, in some scenarios, in some
28:03moments, in some instances, if he is supposed to say, I don't know, then what about us?
28:10And this is also a lesson, by the way, to the people who say, well, if Islam was truly
28:14the truth, it would have every single answer to every question that I've ever asked.
28:20No.
28:21Where was that condition ever set out?
28:23In fact, the Quran tells us the exact opposite.
28:26When the Quran says that the Prophet of God himself will have moments where he will not
28:30know the answer, and only Allah will know, the Quran is teaching us that not every question
28:35that the human being asks can be answered.
28:38Why?
28:39Because we are limited and God is unlimited.
28:42And limited things can never encompass unlimited things, ever.
28:47So as a parent, when your kid comes and says to you, why do I have to do this?
28:51Why do I have to do that?
28:52Instead of going to the safe answer of, because I said so, sometimes it's better to say, well,
29:02if you know the answer, give the answer.
29:04Well, Allah tells us in the Quran this, and it's better for us to do this.
29:07Why do we have to pray five times a day?
29:09Because our Prophet ﷺ tells us, and it's better to follow our Prophet ﷺ.
29:12And we want to be just like him, and we love Allah, and we want to thank Allah for everything
29:16he's given us, and the way we thank Allah is by praying to him.
29:20If that's an answer, good answer.
29:21But if it's a question you don't know the answer to, don't feel free, don't feel afraid
29:24to say what?
29:25I don't know.
29:27But then what do you do?
29:28What's the third step?
29:29So the first step is value the voice.
29:30Number two is admit when you don't know.
29:32And number three is you model how to learn, because knowledge is how conviction grows.
29:39فَاسْأَلُوا أَهْلَ الذِّكْرِ إِن كُنْتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ
29:43Allah says, ask those who know if you don't know.
29:47Ask those who know if you are unaware.
29:50You can teach your children that if I don't know the answer to something, I need to connect
29:55more to Allah's book.
29:57I need to learn more about the life of my messenger.
29:59I need to learn more about my deen, my faith, so that I can find the answers to my problems.
30:06That the answers to my problems are not always going to be searched on Google.
30:10They're not always going to be on different websites or things that I'm looking for.
30:15Sometimes the answers to the real problems I have in life are going to be found in Allah's
30:19book and the example of his messenger.
30:22The last thing I'll say is this.
30:25The common characteristic that the Prophet ﷺ had with young people that made him so
30:31effective, was no one ever felt like they could not approach him.
30:38No one.
30:39Not one person felt like the Prophet ﷺ was either too busy, too upset, too angry, too
30:48important.
30:50No one ever felt like the Prophet ﷺ was unapproachable.
30:53This is one thing that I think if I were to say that we need to fix one characteristic
30:58in the Muslim home.
30:59What's one problem in the Muslim home that we need to fix is we need our homes to be
31:05places of love and approachability.
31:08Parents, my advice to you now.
31:11I'm from your group now.
31:12I'm a parent myself.
31:14This means that when my son is talking to me, I put my phone down.
31:19It doesn't matter if I'm doing work, something that's paying the bills, and my son wants
31:26to tell me how amazing it is that he drew a circle, which is what he did on Thursday.
31:33Baba, Baba, Baba.
31:34Yes, Musa?
31:35I drew a circle.
31:36I said, good job, Musa, right?
31:41There was actually an article that was posted recently from a university in Minnesota that
31:49did a study.
31:50They started a longitudinal study.
31:52It takes years to get actual good data, but they've started this study to test and see
31:57whether or not children believe that their parents love their phones more than their
32:01children.
32:02Obviously, if you were to answer the question, you would say no, right?
32:08But this is something that ... This is one of those things where sometimes we say things,
32:14but we don't realize that our actions are saying differently.
32:17So be approachable, be warm, be loving, let your kids know.
32:24The source of all of this conviction is to know that my kids will never ever seek an
32:31answer to a question that is important without coming to me, because they trust me and they
32:38know that I'm there for them.
32:39We ask Allah to give us happiness in our homes.
32:42We ask Allah to give us conviction in our faith.
32:44We ask Allah to not test us with things that are beyond our capacity.
32:47We ask Allah to give us the strength to be able to conquer anything that he has given
32:52us as a trial.
32:53We ask Allah to bless us in all of our matters and family endeavors.
32:56Amin, Ya Rabb al-Alamin.
32:57Jazakum Allah khayran to Ijna Canada for hosting us.
33:00Barak wa-alaikum wa-salam wa-alaikum wa-rahmatullahi wa-barakatuh.