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00:00This programme contains strong language and adult humour.
00:04APPLAUSE
00:31Hello, everybody, Thursday afternoon.
00:33Whatever has you watching, you're more than welcome.
00:36We will try and brighten up your afternoon.
00:38Hey, Rach. Hello.
00:40We have a challenger who reckons he's the king of bad jokes,
00:44but I reckon he's got competition with you and I
00:47because we don't make anybody laugh.
00:49What have you got for me? Apart from ourselves.
00:51It's always important to find yourself funny.
00:53We think we're hilarious. Oh, yeah.
00:55But there's something to be said for a clean joke.
00:57No, they're harder to make people laugh when you can't be vulgar.
01:00Hit me with it. Come on. OK.
01:02How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
01:04It's my favourite one!
01:06I was going to do it!
01:08Fresh Prince! Look for the Fresh Prince.
01:10All right, you'll know this one as well, probably.
01:13What's green, fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you?
01:16Dunno. A snooker table.
01:18Very good.
01:20What do you call a pony with a sore throat?
01:22A little horse. Oh, no.
01:24Yeah, come on, hit me. Right, OK.
01:26Why did the man enter ten pun contests?
01:30Tell me.
01:32Because he thought he would win at least one, but no pun intended.
01:35Come on!
01:37LAUGHTER
01:39But I'm with you on the Will Smith one.
01:41Oh, yeah. It's probably the best.
01:43Right, the Dictionary Corner providing the punchline
01:45to every letters round.
01:47It's Susie Dent and the comedian, the actor, the author,
01:50Arlo Hanlon!
01:52APPLAUSE
01:54Right, we'll give you about 15 minutes.
01:56I want the best clean one-line joke ever, right?
01:59I don't know any clean one-line jokes.
02:01I just know very complicated, slightly filthy jokes.
02:05Well, you've got about 15 minutes to think about it.
02:08Let's reintroduce our champion, Mike Toms, who's won two in a row.
02:12He was retired, he came out of retirement,
02:14and you've had so many jobs.
02:16If I said to you, hi-dee-hi, what would you say?
02:19Obviously, I'd say how-dee-ho,
02:21and the best job I've ever had, probably.
02:23What was it? Tell me about it.
02:25I managed to talk my way into, effectively, a summer season
02:28as a disc jockey in a campsite on the Costa Brava.
02:31Never done it before, never done it since.
02:33Frankly, it wasn't very good.
02:35The console kept electrocuting me,
02:37because it had seen better days, but it was a lot of fun.
02:42Well, good luck, Mike, and there you go.
02:44The man of the moment, your challenger,
02:46Geoff Hoare, originally from Chelmsford in Essex,
02:49now over in Buckinghamshire.
02:51You love telling bad jokes to your grandchildren.
02:54Yeah, and when you asked me earlier,
02:56I just couldn't think of a single one,
02:58but a couple have come back to me, actually.
03:00How do you start a pudding race?
03:02How do you start a pudding race? Yeah.
03:04No idea. Seiko.
03:06LAUGHTER
03:07It's not bad, you know, he's vying for the crown.
03:10Right, you've got another one?
03:12What's yellow and very dangerous?
03:14Shock-invested costumes.
03:16Yes, there you go. You've got the title back.
03:19Of course, one-line jokes.
03:20Right, well, let's see if you can have the last laugh today.
03:23Mike and Geoff.
03:26Right, we'll try and move on from that and get some letters from Mike.
03:29Hi, Rachel. Hi, Mike.
03:30Could I have a consonant, please? Thank you.
03:32Start today with T.
03:34And another one.
03:36S.
03:37And a vowel, please.
03:39I.
03:40And another vowel.
03:42U.
03:43And a consonant.
03:45P.
03:47And another consonant, please.
03:49J.
03:50And another consonant.
03:53G.
03:55A vowel.
03:57A.
03:59And a final vowel, please.
04:01And a final I.
04:04Right, old man in the studio, let's play Kind Time.
04:17MUSIC PLAYS
04:37Geoff.
04:38A very poor four.
04:39And Mike.
04:40An equally poor four.
04:41There you go, Geoff.
04:42Past.
04:43Yes, and Mike.
04:44Gust.
04:45Let's throw these letters in the bin, Ardall.
04:47I think I've got a five.
04:48Ever thought that would be the highlight?
04:50Let's have it.
04:52I am Gates.
04:53G-A-I-T-S.
04:55Yes, different...
04:56Yes, absolutely, different manners of walking.
04:58Yeah.
04:59That would get you to five.
05:01As would a gist.
05:03To take in livestock for payment.
05:05Pitters, as in pita bread.
05:07Five was best for us.
05:09Things can only get better.
05:11And, Geoff, it's your chance to say hello to Rachel.
05:14Hello, Rachel.
05:15Hi, Geoff.
05:16Could I please start with a consonant?
05:18You can, indeed.
05:19S.
05:21And another one.
05:23T.
05:24And another.
05:26P.
05:28A vowel, please.
05:30E.
05:32And another.
05:35O.
05:37A consonant.
05:38M.
05:41A consonant.
05:43D.
05:45A vowel.
05:47A.
05:49And a final consonant.
05:53A final R.
05:5530 seconds.
06:13MUSIC
06:26I think we'll beat four this time.
06:28Mike?
06:29Seven.
06:30Yes, and Geoff?
06:31Just a six.
06:32The six is?
06:33Remote.
06:34And the seven for the points?
06:35Stamped.
06:36Stamped.
06:37Yes, stamped, absolutely fine.
06:38You need two Es for remote, as we just saw, Geoff.
06:40Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
06:42I should have taken my other one.
06:44Ardal, you won the first round.
06:46Not that you're actually involved in the competition,
06:48but how did you do?
06:49Stormed.
06:50Stormed, another seven, very good.
06:52Anything else in there, Sue?
06:53There is an eight if you were a pastor
06:55and you serve as a pastor to a congregation.
06:58Pastored, pastored.
07:00You pastored.
07:01You pastored, very good, for eight points.
07:03Right, first numbers of the day.
07:05And, as always, it's the champion who picks them.
07:07So, Mike?
07:08Two from the top and four from the bottom, please.
07:10Thank you, Mike.
07:11Five too large, four little to kick us off today.
07:14And the first selection is...
07:22And the target...
07:25415, numbers up.
07:41MUSIC PLAYS
07:55415, the target. Geoff?
07:57I'm going to leave that one. OK.
07:59It was close, I think.
08:00No worries. Mike?
08:01415.
08:02OK, off you go, mate.
08:0375 x 5.
08:0575 x 5, 375.
08:074 x 10.
08:094 x 10 is 40.
08:11And add them together.
08:12Well done.
08:13415.
08:14APPLAUSE
08:17You know what I'm missing these days?
08:20More bad jokes.
08:21Yeah, we haven't had it in ages.
08:23Whatever happened to the inverted T?
08:25It's one large. We like to mix it up.
08:27We like things more interesting over here.
08:29Hopefully we'll get an inverted T at some stage.
08:31Right, the teatime teaser, Slob Scene.
08:33Slob Scene.
08:34Once you fill it, it's left without.
08:36Once you fill it, it's left without.
08:38APPLAUSE
08:52Welcome back. Slob Scene becomes boneless.
08:55Once you fill it, it's left without.
08:58Another teatime teaser later, but back to the game.
09:00It's our challenger, Geoff, who needs to get his skates on,
09:03so let's get some more letters.
09:05I'll start with a vowel this time, please, Rachel.
09:07Thank you, Geoff. E.
09:09And a consonant.
09:11T.
09:13And another.
09:15N.
09:17And another consonant, please.
09:19S.
09:21Another vowel.
09:22A.
09:24And a vowel.
09:25E.
09:28A vowel.
09:30I.
09:32Consonant.
09:33N.
09:35And a final consonant, please.
09:37Looks good. A final H.
09:39Thank you, Rachel.
10:05MUSIC
10:11How did you get on, Geoff?
10:12Just a five.
10:13That's OK. And Mike?
10:14A six.
10:15OK, the five is?
10:16Nine.
10:17Mike?
10:18Haston.
10:19Yeah, Haston, there you go. Very good.
10:21Six, how did you get on, Arnold?
10:22I got a couple of sixes.
10:24I have innate and thanes.
10:27Thanes.
10:28The thane of Cawdor and the other thanes.
10:31Brilliant.
10:32Yeah, I love thanes.
10:33That's really good thanes.
10:35Insane is another one.
10:36Shanty, Hindi for peace.
10:39Couldn't get beyond a six.
10:40No higher than that?
10:41No.
10:42All right, we'll move on.
10:43And we'll get some more letters now from Mike.
10:46OK, could I have a consonant, please?
10:48Thank you, Mike.
10:49B.
10:50And another consonant.
10:52N.
10:54A vowel.
10:55E.
10:57And another vowel.
10:58I.
10:59And a consonant.
11:02C.
11:04And another consonant, please.
11:06D.
11:09Another consonant, please.
11:11V.
11:13A vowel, please.
11:15E.
11:17And a final vowel.
11:18And a final I.
11:21Good luck.
11:31MUSIC PLAYS
11:53Mike?
11:54Seven.
11:55And Geoff?
11:56Six.
11:57The sixes?
11:58Divine.
11:59Mike saw.
12:00This is OK.
12:01Evinced.
12:02Very good.
12:03Yes, revealed.
12:04Evinced.
12:05Very nice indeed.
12:06Arnold, did you get evinced?
12:07I did.
12:08There you go.
12:09Well done.
12:10Very businesslike.
12:11I did, Colin.
12:12I'm the proof.
12:13I did, Colin.
12:14Move on with the show.
12:15I shall do that.
12:16Let's get some numbers your first time.
12:18Picking them, Geoff.
12:19I think I'll go for the legendary inverted T, please, Rachel.
12:23Colin, Colin, Colin.
12:24If this is boring, I'm blaming you.
12:26Right.
12:27One large, five little.
12:28Hopefully an interesting one.
12:29Thank you, Geoff.
12:30This time we have five, ten, three, two, seven,
12:35and a large one, 75.
12:37And the target, 937.
12:39937, numbers up.
12:41MUSIC PLAYS
12:57MUSIC CONTINUES
13:12937, Mike.
13:14Erm, 940.
13:17OK, that's three away.
13:19Geoff?
13:20Erm, a long way away.
13:21A long way away.
13:22Well, the 940 will tick the points.
13:24OK, ten plus three.
13:26Ten plus three, 13.
13:28Erm, times 75.
13:30975.
13:32Erm, then seven times the five.
13:3635.
13:37And take that away.
13:38940.
13:39Actually, I could have got 930.
13:40Mike had the two, could have taken away there.
13:42Had the two, yeah, I've ran out of time.
13:44But I can see you looking very smug there, Mr Murray.
13:46Yeah, show me an inverted T I haven't worked out, you know?
13:49It's the magic is back, now I've seen it.
13:51Come in.
13:52Erm, I haven't written it down,
13:54but I think it's seven multiplied by two plus the five.
13:57Yes, seven times two, 14, plus five, 19.
14:00Add to the 75.
14:02Or 94.
14:03Multiply by the ten, take away the three.
14:05Well done, ten points to Colin.
14:10Although I've revelled in our chats every day,
14:12because a lot of people are very prepared in Dictionary Corner.
14:16I don't mean this as an insult, you're like, talk about anything.
14:19So, listen, let's leave behind the books,
14:22let's leave behind the acting, let's leave behind the comedy.
14:25What interests you, what do you do, what do you like?
14:28I like to play tennis.
14:30Really?
14:31In my spare time.
14:32And I have a lot of spare time, so I play a lot of tennis.
14:36You only write one book every quarter of a century,
14:39you've got a lot of time.
14:40Yeah, exactly, I've earned the right, I've earned it.
14:43Yeah, no, I love to play tennis, I used to play a lot of football.
14:46And, you know, I think the saddest day of my life
14:49was when I had to stop playing football about ten years ago.
14:52I did play one or two games since then.
14:55I remember there was one, I worked on the show Death and Paradise
14:58in the Caribbean, and I remember,
15:01so five years after I gave up my football career,
15:04I got roped into a game between sort of the Brits and the Irish
15:09against the rest of the world,
15:11who were mostly French and local people from Guadeloupe.
15:14So we had this kind of a grudge match.
15:18And I thought I was playing really well, you know,
15:21ghosting into the box and scoring a few goals
15:24and spraying the ball around.
15:26I was so thrilled with myself, but then it dawned on me
15:29that no-one was allowed to tackle me, because if I got injured,
15:32we couldn't carry on with the shoot.
15:34So that was kind of embarrassing.
15:36And then when I got back home to Dublin, where I live,
15:39I thought I still had it, you know, and my first game back,
15:42I wrenched my groin, my abdominals, in the first five minutes,
15:45and I couldn't walk for about six months.
15:47So, you know, I learned the hard way.
15:49The great thing about tennis is that no-one's allowed to tackle you.
15:52So I think that's why I took that up.
15:54Brilliant. Thank you very much.
15:58Back to the game. Bit of a gap at the moment,
16:00but it's not game, set and match.
16:02Just remember that, Geoff. Long way to go.
16:04And, Mike, it's your letters.
16:06A constant, please, Rachel. Thank you, Mike. S.
16:08And another one, please.
16:10M.
16:12And a vowel.
16:14And another one.
16:18A consonant.
16:21And another consonant.
16:25And another consonant, please.
16:30A vowel.
16:33And a final vowel, please.
16:39Half a minute.
16:44ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS
17:10Mike? Seven.
17:12Very good. Geoff? Just a six.
17:14Yeah, it must be a great seven. Geoff, what's your six?
17:16Sources. Yes, well done.
17:18And, Mike? Menaces.
17:20Menaces. What you are today, by the way.
17:23You're having a great competition so far.
17:25That'll be the seven points.
17:27Ardell, could you have kept pace?
17:29No, I could not. I had a six.
17:31Ensues. Ensues, yeah.
17:33Yeah.
17:35I had menace. Yeah.
17:37Wow. It's nothing worse than when you see the S at the end.
17:40Anything better?
17:42No, nothing better. Just another seven.
17:44Uncases.
17:46You know, it's all very popular to unbox or uncase a new item
17:49on social media. That's what we do.
17:51OK, yes. People do the reveal. OK.
17:54OK, Geoff, let's get some more letters.
17:56Start with a vowel, please, Rachel.
17:58Thank you, Geoff. O.
18:00And a consonant.
18:02R.
18:04And another consonant.
18:06C. And another.
18:08R.
18:10A vowel.
18:12A. And another vowel.
18:14E.
18:16And a consonant.
18:19D.
18:21And a final consonant.
18:24L.
18:26And a vowel.
18:28A bonus.
18:30I.
18:32Countdown.
18:38ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS
19:03Penstone, Mike and Geoff. How did you do, Geoff?
19:05Six again. Six again.
19:07And Mike? Seven.
19:09Seven. The sixes, Geoff? Radial.
19:11Radial. And Mike? Carried.
19:13Carried is fine. Radial, though, not there?
19:16No, not radial with an E, unfortunately.
19:18You need two As for that.
19:20Any sevens? Any more sevens?
19:22I found cordial. Oh, I love a cordial.
19:24Which is a seven. Cordials are great.
19:26But there's also an eight letter...
19:28I mean, if you can use Shakespearean characters, Cordelia.
19:31Oh, nice. I wonder if it means a plant or anything.
19:33No.
19:35That's lovely. Lovely name.
19:37Mike, let's get some numbers.
19:39Two from the top and four little ones, please.
19:41Thank you, Mike. Quickly becoming your favourite.
19:43Two large, four little.
19:45And these four little ones are seven,
19:48four, two, three,
19:52and 125.
19:54Your big Es, the target, 762.
19:57762. Numbers up.
19:59ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS
20:05ELECTRONIC MUSIC CONTINUES
20:29762, the target. Mike?
20:32764.
20:34762 away. Geoff?
20:36Too far away again. No worries. Don't worry about it, Geoff.
20:38Mike, let's get yours.
20:404 plus 2. 4 plus 2, 6.
20:42Plus 100. 106.
20:44Times 7.
20:46742.
20:48Plus 25.
20:50767.
20:52And minus 3.
20:54764, which is what you declared. Yeah.
20:56Very good. Seven points.
20:58Ready to take us all the way to ten?
21:00Yes, one way.
21:025 plus 2.
21:04127.
21:067 minus 4 is 3.
21:08Plus 3 is 6.
21:10And times them together. 762.
21:12APPLAUSE
21:14Very clever two-time teaser for you
21:16to get you to the other side of the break.
21:18It's Expo Play.
21:20Expo Play.
21:22You can get this if you play your cards right.
21:24Iyer, Iyer.
21:26You can get this if you play your cards right.
21:28Iyer, Iyer.
21:30APPLAUSE
21:42Welcome back. Did you get it?
21:44Expo Play becomes Apoplexy.
21:46You can get this if you play your cards right.
21:48Iyer, Iyer.
21:50Nobody needs me to do a Bruce Forsyth impression.
21:52But it's a good game, good game so far for Mike.
21:54He's on 62, Geoff.
21:56On fours.
21:58On fours.
22:00Let's try and get you some more points here, picking the letters.
22:02Consonant, please, Rachel.
22:04Thank you, Geoff. T.
22:06And another.
22:08P.
22:10And a vowel.
22:12O.
22:14And another vowel.
22:16U.
22:18And a consonant.
22:20T.
22:22And another vowel.
22:24E.
22:27A vowel.
22:30O.
22:32And finish on a consonant.
22:34Finish with T.
22:36Kein Dein.
22:56MUSIC PLAYS
23:08Geoff? Just a six.
23:10Yeah, and Mike? Six.
23:12There you go. What is this six, Mike?
23:14Potter. Potter. And Geoff?
23:16I'm thinking of golf here. Potter.
23:18Potter. There you go.
23:20The potter and the potter for sixes all round.
23:22Do any better, Arlo?
23:24Sixes. Maybe potter, potter and touter.
23:28Touter, yeah.
23:30Yeah, absolutely fine.
23:32There you go.
23:34Sorry for checking.
23:36There is a seven there with outport,
23:38which is a subsidiary port for ships.
23:40An outport.
23:42Yes. For seven. Right.
23:4468 plays 10.
23:46Mike, let's do it all again.
23:48OK. Consonant, please, Rachel.
23:50Thank you, Mike. R.
23:52And another one, please.
23:54Q.
23:56A vowel, please.
23:58E.
24:00And another one.
24:02A.
24:04And a consonant.
24:06L.
24:08And another one.
24:10S.
24:12And another consonant.
24:14G.
24:16And a vowel.
24:18I.
24:20E.
24:2230 seconds.
24:24ELECTRONIC MUSIC
24:51Geoff?
24:53Seven this time. Yes. Mike?
24:55Six. Oh, here we go.
24:57The big comeback's on. Mike, what have you got?
24:59Glares. Glares.
25:01And Geoff? Realise?
25:03Very good indeed. Yes.
25:05A few in there, isn't there? A few sevens?
25:07There are a few sevens, but if you stick a G in realise,
25:10you have regalise, to make royal.
25:12Oh, come on, now. Is that a word?
25:14It is. And is there a word laggerise?
25:17To make it more like... To make lagger.
25:19To make lagger. Well, if not, if not...
25:21Not in at the moment. Right, OK, but you'll talk to a few people?
25:24I will. Right, Susie, shall we have some origins of words?
25:27Well, sometimes when people say,
25:29well, that should be in the dictionary, that's outrageous, it's not,
25:32I tend to think, when pigs fly...
25:34So I'm going to talk about barnyard idioms today,
25:37cos that seems quite appropriate.
25:39When pigs fly, incidentally, began in full as,
25:43pigs will be flying with their tails forward,
25:46which makes things even more unlikely.
25:48If you'll do something when pigs fly, it'll never happen,
25:51and certainly not if their tails are facing that way.
25:54But we also have happy as a pig in mud, don't we, is a nice...
25:57Have you heard that one? Something like it, yes.
26:00Yes, something like it. But it's a nice sort of substitute, I think,
26:03for happy as Larry, happy as a clam at high tide, etc.
26:06Lots of variations on that one, as you will know.
26:09Also, happy as a pig in clover,
26:11or happy as a pig in a puddle, from the 19th century.
26:14So, whatever makes your animals happy, in other words.
26:18Then you have bringing home the bacon.
26:21There's a lovely story attached to this one,
26:24which goes back to the story of a local lord, really,
26:28and his wife, who dressed themselves as common folk
26:32and asked the prior to bless them,
26:34because they hadn't argued for a year after being married,
26:37and the prior was so impressed with their devotion
26:40that he gave them a side of bacon.
26:43And a regular contest was then started,
26:45with contestants coming from far and wide,
26:47and if they could prove that they never argued, how, I don't know,
26:50they would bring home the bacon.
26:52And the most famous one today is the Dunmow flitch, it's called,
26:56which still takes place.
26:58But Chaucer mentioned this in one of his stories,
27:00so it is sort of approaching the truth.
27:03But bringing home the bacon is probably just a reference
27:06to the fact that bacon was seen as a very important foodstuff,
27:09like, you know, only one's bread, that kind of thing.
27:12And finally, having a cow.
27:14If you have a cow, you get very angry and very upset.
27:16It was a catchphrase of Bart Simpson,
27:18but actually goes back to the middle of the 20th century
27:20and is thought to be a riff on having kittens,
27:23and that is a whole other story.
27:25Yeah.
27:29Let's get more letters now from Geoff.
27:31Consonant, please, Rachel.
27:33Thank you, Geoff. S.
27:36And another.
27:38F.
27:39And a third one.
27:41T.
27:42And a fourth one.
27:44N.
27:46And a vowel.
27:48I.
27:49And another vowel.
27:50A.
27:51And another vowel.
27:53E.
27:55Another vowel.
27:58O.
27:59And finish with a consonant.
28:03T.
28:04Start the clock.
28:11CLOCK TICKS
28:36Time's up, Geoff.
28:37Five.
28:38And Mike?
28:39Eight.
28:40Oh, big eight. The comeback's over.
28:42What have you got there, Geoff?
28:44Stent.
28:45Stent.
28:46And Mike, for the eight?
28:48Faintest.
28:49Faintest.
28:50Very good.
28:51Yes!
28:55Very good. Didn't see that at all.
28:57Ardell, did you get it?
28:58No, I just got a seven.
28:59Fattens.
29:00Yeah, nice words in there, Suze.
29:02Yeah, well, it can take you to a nine.
29:04No.
29:05Rare medical term.
29:07Fetations.
29:09F-E-T-A-T-I-O-N-S.
29:11The production, formation or gestation of a foetus.
29:14Very good.
29:18There you go, a very strong eight from Mike,
29:21a fantastic nine from Suze.
29:23And, Mike, you're giving us our last letters.
29:25Consonant, please.
29:27Thank you, Mike.
29:28P.
29:29And another consonant.
29:31R.
29:32A vowel.
29:34A.
29:35Another vowel.
29:37U.
29:38A consonant.
29:40W.
29:41And another consonant.
29:44S.
29:45Another consonant.
29:48L.
29:49A vowel.
29:52O.
29:55And a final vowel, please.
29:57A final E.
29:59Last letters.
30:07ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS
30:30Mike Toms.
30:32Six.
30:33Geoff Hoare.
30:34Seven.
30:35Oh, go for it, why not? Mike, what have you got?
30:37Sprawl.
30:38Sprawl, yeah. And Geoff?
30:39Perusal.
30:40Perusal.
30:41Lovely, very nice indeed.
30:42Perusal.
30:43Yeah.
30:44I always know when Arlo's got a good word.
30:46His face lights up like a six-year-old on Christmas morning.
30:48What have you got?
30:49I'm just happy to be here.
30:50I bet you've got a seven early.
30:52No, I don't have a seven, I don't, I promise.
30:54I have a slower.
30:55Slower.
30:56Slower.
30:57All right, what have you got over there, Suze?
30:59Yes, perusal is lovely.
31:00Perilous is there as well, this perilous state.
31:02Dangerous, perilous.
31:04Right, OK.
31:05You're perilous to do anything about the result of this.
31:07In a Northern Irish accent, that works.
31:0976 plays 24.
31:12Last numbers round.
31:13And you're picking them, Geoff?
31:15Yeah, let's just take a gamble on five small.
31:18Just for fun.
31:20Just five small and one big?
31:22Sorry, six small.
31:24Six small, yes, that's more like a gamble.
31:26Six little ones to Colin's disdain.
31:29My delight.
31:30Right, thank you, Geoff.
31:31Final numbers of the day.
31:326, 8, 9, 5, 3 and 10.
31:38And the target to reach, 744.
31:42744, last numbers.
32:02MUSIC PLAYS
32:15744, Mike.
32:18744.
32:19And Geoff?
32:20No.
32:21Don't worry about it, mate.
32:22Mike, 744 on the nose.
32:24Right, hope I've got this right.
32:269 x 8, 72.
32:289 x 8, 72.
32:308 x 8, minus 5 is 3.
32:32Oh, you've used your 8 already.
32:35Sorry about that.
32:37No points at all.
32:38Rachel, take it away.
32:40Well, you could have said 10 x 9 is 90.
32:45Add the 3 for 93 and times that by 8.
32:50744.
32:55Sensational work, Riley.
32:5776 plays 24 and an unassailable lead for Mike.
33:01Fingers on the buzzers, guys.
33:03It's not crucial but it's a lot of fun
33:05as we reveal today's Countdown Conundrum.
33:27MUSIC PLAYS
33:38Nothing from Mike or Geoff on this one.
33:41Rach?
33:42Oh, Susie won't like it.
33:44It's dead animals.
33:46It's taxidermy.
33:47Taxidermy, very good.
33:49APPLAUSE
33:50Suitable work, Geoff, cos you did take a bit of a stuffing today.
33:53Precisely.
33:54It's been a delight to have you in here.
33:56Thank you for being here.
33:57It's been great being here, too. Thanks for everybody.
33:59There you go.
34:00Mike, nearly halfway to OctoChamp.
34:02We'll see if you can get there tomorrow.
34:04Right, there you go, Arnold.
34:06One more day tomorrow and then you'll be off-ski back to Dublin.
34:10Yes, yes, it's been a fabulous ride.
34:13Susie, thank you.
34:14What did the duck say when she bought a new lipstick?
34:17What did the duck say when she bought a new lipstick?
34:20Go ahead.
34:21Put it on my bill.
34:22Aye!
34:24Very good.
34:25We'll do better tomorrow, I promise.
34:27Susie, Rachel and I will be here in Countdown Oz.
34:32You can contact the programme by email at countdown at channel4.com
34:36or write to us at countdownleagues ls31js.
34:40You can also find our web page at channel4.com forward slash countdown.
34:48A 1950s adventure recreated and using the same vehicle.
34:52Travelling from Singapore to London.
34:54All episodes of The Last Overland are available to stream on all four.