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Category

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Learning
Transcript
00:00That really is why people move on from relationships so often, but if you have a relationship where
00:11differences still abound, where you help produce in each other new clarity about what you prefer
00:19so that you have a dynamic active relationship, then it can be eternal.
00:25But if you can ever get so compatible and so same and so aligned in every idea about
00:34everything, then this relationship has no more potential to produce expansion.
00:41And I understand that and I see the beauty and she has helped me grow tremendously.
00:45What happens so often is instead of embracing that difference in a non-defensive way, most
00:55are defensive because most people, and it's so screwy, but most people, when they encounter
01:02someone, especially someone up close to them who they love very much, when they encounter
01:06a difference in an opinion in someone like that, their usual knee-jerk response is to
01:11become defensive.
01:13And in their defensiveness, they immediately lose their connection with their own clarity,
01:18their own source.
01:19They're no longer in the receiving mode.
01:21So of course your goal is to remain in the receiving mode while you are acknowledging
01:26your differences.
01:28And it's a little tricky, but it's only tricky because as humans, you have developed patterns
01:33of defense.
01:34Like if someone doesn't agree with me, then I need to get them on board with me instead
01:38of understanding the value of the varying perspectives.
01:42When you come together collectively as a group, there are not two of you that are the same.
01:48You are so varied in your approach to life, which makes you collectively really, really
01:53good for one another.
01:55Because without variance or difference, you could not produce new ideas.
02:00So rather than feeling defensive about, about anything, instead what you're wanting to do
02:06is acknowledge that there is advantage in it.
02:08And that's what we've been calling step five.
02:11Step five is realizing that you are, you are having some contrast and that you are aware
02:15of some contrast.
02:16But at the same time that you are having some contrast, you are not out of the vortex in
02:22the contrast.
02:23And that, that's what we're asking you.
02:25Do you think you can do?
02:26Can you, can you be, can you be aware of something not wanted and still be in vibrational sync
02:37with your inner being?
02:38Yes.
02:39And the way you do it is by acknowledging the value of the contrast, by appreciating
02:43the value of the contrast.
02:45There is value in contrast.
02:46There is.
02:47So, so you say, thank you very much.
02:49I hadn't looked at it in that way.
02:51I'll think about that.
02:52I may not ever agree with you completely, but I, I like that we have a broader view.
02:58I do see the value in contrast.
03:00And early on, I used to, like if she would say something that would hurt my feelings
03:05or something.
03:06Like what?
03:07I used to fight fire with fire.
03:08Well, most do.
03:09That's that.
03:10That's defensiveness.
03:11But that's just, but that, but, but you can't push against.
03:15Yeah.
03:16Anyone without being off in the wilderness apart from your own inner being.
03:20Yes.
03:21So, so when you fight fire with fire, what happens is you leave your true power and you
03:26wage a battle that, that you're not winning even when you're winning.
03:31And, and, and the reason that most who are fighting fire with fire or who are fighting
03:36at all, the reason that most get more and more belligerent about it or more and more
03:42strong about it is because you have a unconscious, maybe, maybe conscious awareness that you've
03:49stepped out of your energy zone, out of your power zone, out of your true leverage zone.
03:54And now you're trying to make up for it through the action and the words, which are never
03:59very strong, but it's what makes people be so ridiculous is what makes people be ridiculous
04:05with their words and their threats and their bullying because, because they're out of connection
04:10with true.
04:11If you're in connection with the true source, you don't feel like bullying anyone.
04:15You don't make threats.
04:16You just stand in your power and do everything you can to uplift, you see.
04:22So in, in the midst of a, a sort of battle with your lover, as you stay in your full
04:29power, then there's no battle because there's no threat of you losing your true power.
04:35You see, that's why, that's why when you battle with each other and you get defensive is because
04:40you've lost your power and now you're fighting against the person that you feel took your
04:44power away.
04:45So it's, it's tricky because when we want to talk about something that's uncomfortable
04:51or something that causes tension between us, I don't want to focus on the negativity.
04:57I want to stay in alignment, but we want that too for you.
05:01But, but more than that, we want there to be nothing to be uncomfortable between you.
05:09In other words, there's nothing uncomfortable between your inner being and you.
05:13Your inner being doesn't care if you listen to them in your underwear.
05:21In other words, there, there, there is no, there, there's nothing that you do that set,
05:25that causes your inner being to separate from you.
05:28There's plenty that you do that causes you to not be in the vibrational vicinity of your
05:32inner being, but there's, there's, it's not your, you, you can't get away from your inner
05:36being.
05:37Your inner being will continue to acknowledge you, to know you, and to love you no matter
05:41what.
05:42It's only your ideas that cause the separation you see.
05:45So, and this is just, this isn't all the time.
05:48This is just the times when you do have contrast.
05:50So for example, say she comes home and she's out of alignment and she's upset and, and
05:56I'll try to stay in alignment.
05:57So I try to separate myself, but it almost seems insensitive.
06:01But here's the first question that we want to ask you.
06:04So she comes home out of alignment and we're assuming that from your perspective, you were
06:08in alignment before she came home out of alignment.
06:11So let's say that's the case, that, that, that, that you are in alignment when she comes
06:19home out of alignment.
06:21And so when that happens, you, like your inner being, your only intention with her is to
06:27help her get back into alignment.
06:29But let's say that she's so out of alignment that she's even snarky about you.
06:33But if you were really in alignment, you wouldn't take any of that personally.
06:37You would just understand that she could use a little talking off the ledge and you would
06:41just continue to love her anyway.
06:43You could find her contrast endearing or even of value.
06:48But if you're not really solidly in alignment and she comes home out of alignment and therefore
06:55you see her as a risk to your alignment, that's what makes you defensive.
07:01So if you are solidly in alignment, then you don't feel that risk and then you don't
07:05feel defensive.
07:08You see what we're getting at?
07:10So usually you don't really rendezvous with anyone who's too far from where you are, unless
07:16you live with them.
07:17In other words, we understand that.
07:19In other words, if you live with them, they're going to come home, no matter law of attraction,
07:24be damned.
07:27They're coming home.
07:29They're coming home because that's where their bed is.
07:33They're coming home.
07:34And so you just, you just have to be ready for them to come home.
07:38Which means you have to, you have to be in alignment with yourself.
07:42And when you're in alignment with yourself, then there's value in everything that you
07:45see.
07:46When you're not in alignment with yourself, then you need everything to be the way you
07:50need it to be in order to what you erroneously in a flawed premise way think will support
07:56your alignment.
07:57You do not owe it to each other to be in alignment.
08:00And when you feather somebody else's nest, when you are so in alignment that, that, that
08:06they just, they use you for their inner being, then there are going to be testy times because
08:11nobody can stand in that solid place of being the support, like the inner being is for anybody
08:17else.
08:18And yet you do that to each other all the time.
08:21You, you want each other to be the way you need them to be in order to feel good.
08:24And when they're not, then they're doing something wrong.
08:27And that, that isn't how it is.
08:30Contrast is your strength.
08:31It is.
08:32I see the beauty in contrast.
08:33It's actually easier for me when she's in alignment and I'm out of it.
08:37Of course it is.
08:38Of course it is.
08:41Everyone likes those who are easy to love the easy to love ones.
08:45You think are your greatest benefit, but they are not.
08:48We're not asking you.
08:49We don't want you to be nice to each other from an out of alignment.
08:54We don't want you to fake it.
08:56We want you.
08:57Esther saw an advertisement in a magazine years ago, Jerry and Esther were on an airplane
09:01and it was a, a hotel ad.
09:05And the ad said, we don't hire people and tell them to be nice.
09:10We hire nice people because you can't make anybody be nice if they're out of alignment.
09:18And so Esther assumed that what the ad was saying is we hire people who are in alignment.
09:23We hire people who, who know about staying, who's, who it's, it's become their nature
09:28to want to feel good.
09:30Well, life keeps coming at you.
09:32This is the thing that we want you to acknowledge, embrace, and, and be all right with life is
09:38going to keep coming at you because there are so many variables and you just want your
09:43shock absorbers to be ready to enjoy, not deal with, not cope with, not tolerate.
09:50We want you to enjoy life as it comes.
09:53Because every time another piece of it comes, it comes in answer to a request for expansion
09:59that you have set out there.
10:02Every bit of it.
10:03So when something comes, it feels a little uncomfortable.
10:06What it is, is posing the question which you're putting in the vortex, which will attract
10:11the answer, which you, if you're one of the cooperative components, then when you get
10:16to move toward the answer of your own question or toward the solution to your own problem,
10:21you get to experience the growth expansion that you're all about.
10:25You see, it's so interesting to us.
10:28We love you so much, but so, so many humans really think that they just want life to just
10:33be this perfect way so they can just observe it and feel good.
10:36And we promise you that will never be.
10:38And that's why you stir so much trouble up.
10:43You look for problems because it's so satisfying to find solutions.
10:48And because problems and solutions, that is the equation for expansion.
10:54Question answer, question answer, question answer, question answer, question answer.
10:58That's the, that's the formula for expansion, which is the mantra of that which we all are.
11:04We are eternal beings.
11:05And if we are not expanding, we are really done and we will never be done.
11:09So you can't stop expanding.
11:10So you might as well embrace your expansion, which means understand how expansion comes.
11:16So when you understand how expansion comes, then just because something's not perfect,
11:19you don't freak out and condemn it and, and, and be rude about it.
11:25When something you embrace it, you appreciate it, you feel thankful for it.
11:30You feel satisfied that it exists.
11:33And then you live happily ever after with so many other, others who have differences
11:40in desires and opinions and beliefs, because no one is a threat to you other than your
11:46own split energy.
11:47And it's not really a threat.
11:48It's just an irritation.
11:50So next time I should be, baby, I'm so glad you're mad at me.
11:53Now I'm just being silly.
11:56Well, no, no, that's not, that's not silly, but there's a, but there's a, there's a more
12:02beneficial to you approach there because, because it, it may or may not be that you're
12:08so glad that she's mad at you, but what you really want to say is, I'm so glad that this
12:17situation has been focused upon and has produced a new desire in me to which I will enjoy moving
12:26toward.
12:28It's so fun to move toward things.
12:30We'll say it again.
12:31100% of all satisfaction comes from a new desire that you're from a desire.
12:36It doesn't have to be new, but we want to say new because if you've got this down desire,
12:41you move toward it.
12:42So you need another new one.
12:43In other words, you're, you're not, you don't ever get it done.
12:47So you know what you don't want, you know what you do want.
12:50What you do want isn't your most active vibration.
12:53What you don't want usually is, but it's the most active vibration for your inner being.
12:57So it's calling you.
12:58So you have to adjust into the new desire because the situation that produced it is
13:02what's most active in you.
13:04Yes.
13:05It is not the way it is.
13:07What is, is what's most active in you.
13:09So now you care about the alignment.
13:11So you look toward it.
13:13You find the feeling place of it.
13:15You do some of the things that we've talked about here and you find the vibrational alignment
13:20to the desire and it feels so good as it clicks into place.
13:24And then once you've found the vibrational alignment, now the manifestation happens too.
13:29So you ask for it, you lined up with it, and now it manifested.
13:34And now you're standing in a whole new place with a whole new set of contrasting experiences,
13:38producing whole new desires.
13:39Yay.
13:40I'm still alive.
13:42And then you line up with that.
13:43It clicks into place.
13:45It manifests.
13:46Now you're standing in a whole new place with a whole new set of contrasting desires.
13:49And what's the flawed premise that so many humans live by, even those who've been listening
13:53to us for a while, is that once I get that, I'll stand in this place and now my work
13:59is done.
14:01And we say, if your work could ever be done, then your satisfaction could be done too.
14:07Because if somebody or something doesn't stir up a new desire to which you are moving toward,
14:12you're not going to find any satisfaction because satisfaction comes only from moving
14:16toward the desire.
14:18Yes.
14:20You don't have to close the gap completely to be satisfied.
14:22You just want to be moving toward it.
14:24You can't be moving in opposition to it.
14:26And you move in opposition to it when you're defending where you came from.
14:30When you think that, when you think that there's this pie that you're splitting up and fighting
14:33over.
14:34It's nothing like that.
14:35The universe is expanding in direct and equal proportion to the desires that you produce
14:40within each other.
14:42So what you want to say is, baby, thank you for producing a new desire within me, a desire
14:47for more harmony, a desire for more understanding.
14:50But most of all, a desire for the expansion that this, that this whatever it is, is producing.

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