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🛠️
Style de vieTranscription
00:00Alors les gars, qu'est-ce que vous voulez faire aujourd'hui ?
00:02Junior, il y a un nouveau show de télévision qui s'appelle Blue's Clues et on doit le regarder.
00:06C'est sur ce chien bleu qui résolve des crimes, et il y a ce gars qui peut s'embrasser dans des peintures,
00:11et il peut parler à la cuisson, et parfois, il peut même envoyer un mail et il peut en parler.
00:15Ce n'est pas un vrai show !
00:16Junior, je vous promets que c'est vrai.
00:17Bon, je veux le regarder, aidez-moi à trouver la remote.
00:19D'accord.
00:20Où est la remote de la télé ?
00:21Où est-elle ?
00:22Junior, la télé est en train de s'éteindre.
00:24Quoi ? Pourquoi elle fait ça ? Est-ce que ma maison est possédée par des fantômes ?
00:28Oh mon dieu, j'ai peur !
00:29Oh non, il y a un fantôme dans la maison !
00:31Ouais, c'est étrange.
00:32C'est Dave !
00:33Attends, arrête.
00:34Ok, peut-être que c'est juste un glitch dans la télévision.
00:36Ok, je vais trouver la remote.
00:37Attends, attends, attends, regarde, maintenant le volume s'éteint.
00:39Quoi ? Il doit y avoir un fantôme !
00:41Attends, attends, Jeffy, est-ce qu'il y a une remote dans tes chaussures ?
00:44Non, je suis juste en train de rouler une full solide en ce moment.
00:46Certaines personnes l'emmènent dans leur pantalon, mais moi, je l'emmène dans mon collar.
00:50Attends, attends.
00:51Elle est dans tes chaussures, Jeffy !
00:53Oh, erreur honnête, je suis tombé sur quelque chose d'autre.
00:55Ok, Cody, je vais changer de chaîne. Dis-moi quand tu trouveras le fantôme.
00:58Ok.
00:59Oh, attends, Junior, la nouvelle !
01:02Breaking news, Mk !
01:04Floyd Mayweather a fait 100 millions de dollars en se battant contre Logan Paul.
01:09Quoi ? Ce gars a 100 millions de dollars juste pour se battre contre quelqu'un ?
01:12Je vais me battre contre quelqu'un pour 100 millions de dollars !
01:14Dude, je vais me battre contre Cody pour 100 millions de dollars !
01:16Je vais me battre contre Cody pour 100 millions de dollars !
01:18Où est mon 100 millions de dollars ?
01:20Où est mon 100 millions de dollars ?
01:21Yeah, that's like 300 millions dollars right there !
01:23Guys, nobody is gonna pay you 100 millions dollars just to hit me !
01:26Well, that guy got 100 millions dollars to hit someone !
01:28That's because he's a professional boxer and he won 50 times !
01:31I'll fight 50 people for 100 millions dollars !
01:33Yeah, yeah, so if I record Jeffy fighting 50 people, will he get 100 millions dollars ?
01:37No, because he's not a boxer !
01:38Well, the Paul guy's not a boxer, he got money !
01:40Well, I guess that's true.
01:41Wait, so if I record Jeffy knocking out 50 people, they'll give us 100 millions dollars ?
01:45Well, I mean, if you show him the video, he might accept to fight.
01:48Ok, so Jeffy, I'm gonna grab my phone and I'm gonna record you knocking out 50 people.
01:51Alright, let's do it.
01:52Alright guys, I got my phone. Jeffy, you ready to knock some people out ?
01:55Yeah, let's do it !
01:56Who's he gonna knock out first, Junior ?
01:57Uh, Joseph, you're up first.
01:59Wait, why me ? I don't wanna get knocked out !
02:01Because, Joseph, we have to knock out 50 people, that's a lot of people.
02:03And plus, Jeffy's gonna split the money, right ?
02:05Yeah, because you guys are helping me !
02:07That's 100 millions dollars split for a wage. That's 25 millions dollars.
02:09You're saying you're not gonna get knocked out for 25 millions dollars ?
02:11I guess...
02:13Alright, so I want you and Jeffy to fight, alright ?
02:15Round 1, fight !
02:18Oh, he got knocked out !
02:19Oh, how does it feel to win ?
02:20Oh, it feels great !
02:21First round TKO, totally called it !
02:23Oh yeah, you're gonna fight someone else next.
02:25Oh yeah.
02:26Alright, we're gonna go fight Chef PB, alright ?
02:27Alright, let's do it !
02:28Oh my god, this looks so good !
02:30I think he's missing a few more goldfish.
02:32Hey Chef PB !
02:33Junior, why are you recording me ?
02:38Oh, he's out ! Oh, he's out !
02:40Oh, how does it feel to win again ?
02:41Feels great, totally called it !
02:43Two times in a row, two KOs !
02:45Yeah, 2-0, 2-0 ! Oh, how does it feel about that ?
02:48It didn't really seem fair, he didn't even see it coming.
02:50You gotta watch out for that left hook, it's really powerful.
02:52While you're cooking ?
02:53Yep, even while you're cooking, the first rule of boxing is always be prepared.
02:55Well, who's he gonna knock out now, Junior ?
02:57Uh, call your parents !
02:58I'm not letting him knock out my parents !
03:00You're not gonna be letting him knock out your parents, it's up to you if your parents can fight or not.
03:03Well, my mom is pretty scrappy.
03:04Look, call your parents and we're gonna knock him out right at the door, he can get two in one fight.
03:07Okay...
03:08Uh, hello ?
03:09Hey there, Cody said we should come over.
03:11Hey, you recording us ? Cause I don't consent, I got a warrant.
03:13Oh, I've always wanted to be on television.
03:15Hello world, my name is Judy, I'm single.
03:18What did you say, woman ?
03:19Alright, Jeffy, go, go, go !
03:20Ding, ding !
03:21Ain't nobody can hit my woman but me !
03:23Ding, ding !
03:24Oh, 4-0, 4-0 !
03:26Oh, undefeated, undefeated !
03:30Jeffy, how does it feel to be 4-0 undefeated ?
03:32Amazing, Junior !
03:33Uh, are my parents okay ? I didn't wanna watch.
03:35Oh, they dropped like flies.
03:37Well, can we at least knock out your parents now ?
03:39Or at least your dad, since you don't have a mom.
03:41Cody, trust me, if I had a mom, I'd knock her out for 25 million dollars.
03:44Junior, do you really think it's worth all the money to give 50 people brain damage ?
03:47Yeah, it's 25 million dollars, Cody !
03:49Alright, Jeffy, you're gonna go knock out my dad next, okay ?
03:51Alright, let's do it !
03:52Alright, let's go !
03:54Charlie and Friends was filmed in front of a live audience.
03:59Oh, hi guys, I'm Charlie.
04:02And today, I'm getting high !
04:12Look, guys, look at how high I am !
04:18Oh, Charlie, you're so funny !
04:20Alright, Jeffy, there's my dad in bed. I want you to put him to sleep.
04:22You want me to read him a bedtime story first ?
04:24Yeah, read him the Three Little Pigs.
04:25Alright.
04:26When the first little piggy built his house out of straw,
04:29and the second little piggy built his house out of bricks,
04:32and the third little piggy just hired me to stand outside of his house.
04:35Wait, what are you guys doing here ?
04:385-0 ! 5-0 ! I'm the champion, I'm the champion !
04:45Did he knock out your dad ?
04:46Oh yeah, he put him to sleep !
04:47Night-night !
04:49He gave him that one piece with no honey mustard.
04:51No biscuit, no drink, he got ripped off !
04:53Well, who are you gonna knock out next ?
04:55Anyone who steps in front of me !
04:57Well, Jeffy, you've kind of been knocking out nobodies.
04:59Nobody's gonna think you're a real fighter.
05:00You need to knock out a celebrity, somebody that everybody knows.
05:03What celebrity is gonna let you knock him out ?
05:05Uh, my dad was watching Charlie and Friends.
05:07What if he knocks out Charlie from Charlie and Friends ?
05:08Wait, you really think he'd let you do that ?
05:10Yeah, we just gotta find him.
05:11Well, I'm pretty sure he records his episodes in your house,
05:13so let's just go downstairs and get him.
05:15Oh yeah, let's do that !
05:17Alright, Jeffy, you're about to do your first celebrity boxing match.
05:19How do you feel ?
05:20Feeling good, Junior, about to go 6-0.
05:22How are you feeling ?
05:23Oh, hi guys, I'm Charlie.
05:26Where's the crowd from ?
05:27Wait, why do you have a box ?
05:29Oh, I thought we were boxing.
05:32Alright guys, and fight !
05:36Oh oh !
05:396-0 ! 6-0 ! 6-0 !
05:41Undefeated ! Undefeated !
05:446-0, you just knocked out Charlie and Friends !
05:46Well, he knocked out Charlie, not all his friends.
05:48Oh, Jeffy, you should have knocked out all of Charlie's friends,
05:50that would have been a lot of people.
05:51Oh man !
05:52Who are you gonna knock out now, Jeffy ?
05:54Well, we haven't knocked out my mommy and daddy yet.
05:56Oh yeah, let's go fight your mom and dad !
05:58Let's do it !
05:59These aren't really fights, he's just kind of hitting people.
06:01It doesn't matter, he's undefeated, they can always hit him back,
06:03they're choosing not to fight back, come on !
06:05Marvin, didn't I do a good job making dinner tonight ?
06:08Yep, you did a really good job putting these pizza rolls in the oven for 15 minutes.
06:11Oh, thank you !
06:13Jeffy, time for dinner !
06:17Wait, Jeffy, why do you have boxing gloves on ?
06:20Jeffy, you can't hit her like that !
06:26Jeffy is now 8-0 !
06:28Who can beat me ? Who can beat me ?
06:30I don't know, maybe somebody who can actually fight back ?
06:32Cody, you just sound jealous !
06:34We only have to knock out 42 more people !
06:36What, before he gets life in jail ?
06:38No, before he can fight Floyd Mayweather and get us 100 million dollars !
06:41Junior, there's no way we can show him knocking out 42 more people,
06:44that would take like an hour !
06:45You're right, we need a montage !
06:47It's montage time !
07:03How many people did he knock out, Junior ?
07:05I think he's 31-0 !
07:07Oh great, he only needs 19 more !
07:09Jeffy, do it !
07:11Okay !
07:13Ow !
07:14Do you give up ?
07:15Yes !
07:16Oh, 32-0 !
07:18Great, now you only need 18 more !
07:20Where are we going to find 18 more people to knock out ?
07:26Breaking news, M'kay !
07:28There's a crazy lunatic that has run away !
07:31There's a crazy lunatic that is running around and punching people in the face !
07:34If you see this man, call 911 immediately !
07:4033-0 !
07:42Oh my god, Jeffy, now you only need 17 more and you can fight Floyd Mayweather !
07:45Junior, didn't you see the news ? He's wanted by the police, you have to stop this !
07:49No, we just have a few more and we can fight Floyd Mayweather for 100 million dollars !
07:52Junior, that's not going to happen !
07:54There's someone at the door !
07:55Jeffy, come on, it might be Floyd Mayweather, you can knock him out !
07:57It's not Floyd !
07:58Hello, Floyd Mayweather ?
08:00Oh no, it's the cops, Junior !
08:02You can't arrest us now, we're so close !
08:04Okay, so he is the one who's been knocking people out ?
08:06Yeah, but it's for a good reason, don't arrest us !
08:08Oh, I'm not here to arrest you, I'm here to thank you !
08:10See, one of the people he knocked out happened to be my wife, and I've been wanting to do that for years !
08:14God, she is so annoying !
08:16But why did you knock out my wife ?
08:18Well, because we want to fight Floyd Mayweather and be like him !
08:20Oh, well I guess that's one way to do it !
08:22I mean, he knocked out his wife and now he's getting millions of dollars !
08:24Exactly, so we thought if we could knock out 50 people on camera, Floyd Mayweather would fight us for 100 million dollars !
08:29Oh, well, I mean, if you need to knock out somebody else, if I get knocked out on duty, I get to go home, and I get a purple heart !
08:35So, Jeffy can knock you out ?
08:37Yeah, sure !
08:38Let's do it, Jeffy !
08:39Alright, shwate !
08:4034, no !
08:4234, no !
08:4434, no !
08:45Who was at the door, Junior ? Was it Floyd Mayweather ?
08:47No, it was a cop, and Jeffy knocked him out !
08:49He did what ? Okay, Junior, this has gone too far, I don't want to be a part of this anymore !
08:53You have to be a part of it, you're next to be knocked out !
08:55No, I already got hit !
08:57Well, you have glasses, so you have two sets of eyes, so you count as two people !
09:01What ? No, Junior, it's your turn to get knocked out !
09:03But that's going to hurt, I don't want to get hit !
09:05Well, yeah, of course it's going to hurt, Junior, but you have to do it !
09:07No, I can find 16 more people, where can I find 16 more people ?
09:13Oh, the people watching this video !
09:15Oh, yeah !
09:16You can knock them out !
09:17Alright, guys, everyone at home, put your nose up against the glass, okay, of your phone, of the TV, or the computer, whatever your watch is on, put your nose up against the glass, and Jeffy's about to knock you out !
09:26Alright.
09:28Ohhhh !
09:29You just got knocked out !
09:30You just got knocked out !
09:32That's like a million or two million.
09:33How many views this video got, that's how many people Jeffy just knocked out !
09:36Oh, yeah, Junior !
09:37And if you hit the like button, that means you just got back up and it didn't hurt and you're awesome and you have a lot of friends.
09:42But if you hit the dislike button, that means you have no friends.
09:45Yeah, if you hit the dislike button, that means you got knocked out and you have no friends...
09:48And you're not cool.
09:49And you're not cool. So, if you hit the dislike button, um, you're dumb !
09:51Si t'as cliqué sur le bouton Like, ça veut dire que t'es revenu et que ça ne t'a pas fait mal, c'est ça ?
09:54Ouais, c'est ça !
09:56Je pense qu'on a tous les preuves qu'il nous faut pour combattre Floyd Mayweather.
09:59Allons appeler Steve Stalberg et faire cette bataille.
10:02Montre-lui tout ce que j'ai.
10:03Allons-y.
10:04Bonjour ?
10:05Bonjour, c'est moi, Steve Stalberg !
10:10Peut-être qu'il se réveillera bientôt, Jeffy.
10:12C'était un coup, garçon !
10:15Jeffy, t'es pas censé le faire encore !
10:17Ça va prendre du temps pour qu'il se réveille !
10:19C'était un coup, garçon !
10:23Alors, pourquoi t'as appelé ?
10:24J'étais avec Jeffy et j'ai enregistré qu'il a tué autant de gens que je pouvais.
10:28Il a tué environ 30 personnes sur la caméra.
10:30Mais il a tué un million de gens autour du monde.
10:32Il a tué un million de gens ?
10:34Oui, mais il n'a jamais été défendu.
10:35Donc, on veut combattre Floyd Mayweather pour 100 millions de dollars.
10:38Hmm... Floyd Mayweather est retiré.
10:40Retiré ? Pourquoi ?
10:42Il a fait sa dernière bataille, donc il est terminé.
10:44C'est la nouvelle d'hier.
10:46Alors, qui peut-on combattre pour 100 millions de dollars ?
10:49Tu peux combattre D-Money, il n'a jamais été défendu.
10:52Jeffy peut le tuer, non ?
10:54Oui, je peux prendre D-Money !
10:56Ok, mais je dois te le dire.
10:58D-Money a tué plus de gens qu'un vieux homme sur ta porte.
11:02Ça n'a pas d'importance. Jeffy peut tuer tout le monde.
11:04J'ai vu beaucoup de gens être tués.
11:06Ok, je vais le préparer pour ce soir.
11:08Et qui gagne, gagne 100 millions de dollars !
11:11Oh mon Dieu ! Jeffy, tu vas combattre D-Money pour 100 millions de dollars !
11:14Oui ! 100 millions de dollars !
11:17Bonjour et bienvenue au Living Room Boxing !
11:20Nous n'avons pas pu acheter un ring de boxe en si peu de temps, donc nous le faisons dans le Living Room !
11:26Dans le coin gauche, mon gauche, nous avons, avec un record de 65 et 0,
11:33qui pèse 180 pouces, D-Money !
11:38Oh ! 65 et 0 ! 65 et 0 !
11:41Le champion indéfendu du monde !
11:43100 millions chaque bataille ! 100 millions chaque nuit !
11:47Et dans le coin droit, mon droit, nous avons, avec un record de 2 millions et 0,
11:58qui pèse 110 pouces, Jeffy !
12:03Hum, mes balles s'échappent et je ne peux pas les échapper avec ces vêtements.
12:07Tout d'accord ! Boxeurs, s'il vous plaît, rencontrez-vous au milieu du Living Room !
12:12Tout d'accord, Messieurs et Messieurs !
12:14Nous allons faire des tournées infinies jusqu'à ce que quelqu'un soit éliminé,
12:18parce que c'est ce que le monde veut voir !
12:21Tout d'accord ! Préparez-vous, Messieurs et Messieurs !
12:231, 2, 3, GO !
12:27All right, man, you ready to go ?
12:28Let's go, man !
12:29Oh, look at you, buddy, getting knocked out, too !
12:31Oh, just got you, four times !
12:33Oh, again !
12:34You ain't want this !
12:37Oh, come on, man, fight back, what you doing ?
12:39Oh, man, stop trying to fuck me, man !
12:41Get on, man, let's go !
12:44Oh, what you doing ?
12:45Where am I going ? I'm over here !
12:46Oh, look at you right there !
12:48Stop trying to fuck me, man !
12:50Oh, hell, man, you trying to kiss me ?
12:55Man, I'm getting tired !
12:59I can't believe what I'm seeing here, folks !
13:02Jeffy just defeated the undefeated, well, now defeated D-Money !
13:10Comment tu te sens, mon garçon ?
13:11Je me sens bien, oui, je l'ai battu au début, j'ai dû tirer quelques blocs,
13:16et puis je l'ai embrassé, il ne m'attendait pas à ça,
13:19donc j'ai l'impression d'avoir la main supérieure sur celui-là,
13:21et puis je l'ai terminé avec une forte coupe supérieure à la fin, et voilà !
13:26Eh bien, Jeffy, tu as gagné 100 millions de dollars !
13:32Oh, oui, ça me sent bien, aussi, mais les impôts me font mal,
13:35je vais probablement en manger une moitié de ça, mais on va bien !
13:38Jeffy a gagné 100 millions de dollars !
13:41C'est vraiment cher !
13:43Je vais juste m'occuper de mon argent toute la journée !
13:46Tu veux dire mon argent ?
13:47Qu'est-ce que tu fais ici ?
13:49Tu te souviens quand il m'a tapé dans le visage sur la nouvelle ?
13:51Oui ?
13:52Eh bien, mon visage est inséré pour plus de 100 millions de dollars,
13:56donc je te juge pour 100 millions de dollars !
13:59Oh, mon Dieu, on va perdre tout l'argent que Jeffy a gagné !
14:02Il nous reste 50 autres à battre pour que nous puissions gagner de nouveau !
14:07Oh, Jeffy, ils regardent encore !
14:09Tue-le dans le visage pour gagner de l'argent !