Married at First Sight UK S9 Episode 8
Married at First Sight UK S9 Episode 8
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Oh
00:00:04Previously
00:00:06The first in a party brought unexpected absences
00:00:14It was a night of troubling truths, I'm not finding attractive. I don't see why we are matched. He's told me that I'm not
00:00:24We did on the way tonight essentially he's saying I'm not attracted to her yet. I had sex with her
00:00:30One being hater got 10 being I love you. What's your number?
00:00:36And a shocking discovery sent Holly and Alex into meltdown
00:00:42That's a red flag that he would swap lives I'm not coping with someone who's so disrespectful
00:00:47Never would a man be around my kids who speaks like that
00:00:50Okay, let me tell you let me tell you walk on straight out the door mate
00:00:57Tonight welcome to your very first commitment ceremony the newlyweds come face-to-face with the experts
00:01:03The end of the honeymoon was tumultuous for you both
00:01:07We had a really big fight and we haven't kissed since that day. I am scared of rejection. I'm scared of losing her
00:01:13I'm sorry. I just hate all this stuff two couples still struggle to bond on a deeper level
00:01:21I
00:01:23Was so different on so many levels I
00:01:26Don't get it. This is my life
00:01:29I know that I'm not what you normally go for
00:01:31I'm not forcing it. What if I've got a faucet then it's not there if I'm affectionate with her
00:01:36I don't want to give the wrong idea, but you're married and you've had sex
00:01:39And the rift between Holly and Alex persists you speak to me like I'm a boy in the street
00:01:46If this was not this process you would have been ghosted
00:01:50Why I hate the situation
00:02:02Aree
00:02:04Got some melon. Yeah, right after last night's dinner party. I fancy that she's on toast. Do you fancy be like say?
00:02:13One couple in particular remain a topic of conversation
00:02:18Holly and Alex I think are a bit of a disaster at the minute. The communications not very good
00:02:25Communications important though in it
00:02:29They ended up leaving on not very good terms, it's not a thought that should be in your head
00:02:34But if it is you keep it yourself, I
00:02:36Hope they're able to fix it. Yeah, I do really do
00:02:42After what happened at the dinner party last night, I spent the night alone
00:02:47I've seen things in Holly that I don't particularly like
00:02:51All I've done is made a comment and everybody's just seeing me as the bad guy
00:02:57Part of me wants to leave this experiment because I've gone from having a guy who's giving me everything I need to the polar opposite
00:03:06I'm not wasting my time with a guy who's gonna disappoint me and lie to me
00:03:18Last night was interesting. Don't you think there's a few little fall outs? I know me and you had a little I
00:03:25Think it was just the whole scale thing. That's what bothered me. It was just a really shit way to go about things
00:03:31Let's not forget how old we are
00:03:33Adam is acting very blase about the whole thing. I
00:03:36Do feel like it is a bit of a kick in the teeth if anything
00:03:40It has kind of made me want to pull back a little bit
00:03:42The only problem we've got is something that the experts can't help us with there's nothing they can say that's gonna make me go
00:03:48Oh, okay. Yeah, I fancy are you for more? It's the one thing that I actually can't change
00:03:54Cannot change what I look like
00:03:56It does obviously still make me feel a bit rubbish at the fact that I know that I'm not his type
00:04:01But I'm really looking forward to speaking to the experts today to kind of delve deeper in where his head's at
00:04:07I just want him to be honest and open with how he feels
00:04:12How are you feeling about Rochelle not being there
00:04:17It was horrible seeing Orson walking on his own. He's my guy and I just don't the same without his wife. That's why we're all here
00:04:23Yeah
00:04:25It's crazy that I got married a week ago and my wife's not by my side and I'm missing her
00:04:33Tonight is the commitment ceremony and I'm very nervous that Michelle might not come back and I have no idea
00:04:40Where our future lies?
00:04:42Me
00:04:45And Eve haven't spent a night together since our wedding night and I am missing her
00:04:52She wants to wait until we've met with the expert
00:04:54So we're just hoping that after today she'll officially come and move in and we can start again
00:05:02We were five star last night we were absolutely great, but I haven't forgot what's happened
00:05:09The only one wasn't great there was a lot of fights
00:05:13It breaks my heart when someone's mean to me, especially when I let them get close to me. It's a trigger
00:05:21Meeting everyone I am last night as it made you realize anything about us
00:05:26Yeah, we definitely get on a lot more than some of the couples, right?
00:05:30We actually have a really good thing like you got a vibe is like mates first
00:05:35Or turn into lovers, you know
00:05:45I'm looking forward to today because we can't move forward at the moment until we've seen the experts. Yeah
00:05:50I'm not seeing things I asked for
00:05:53and
00:05:55How we were matched I need a deeper understanding. I wish I fancied her. I wish that we were falling in love, but I've got
00:06:03Worries and doubts what the experts have to say is going to be enough for me to see the path forward
00:06:27Oh my god
00:06:30This and I'm so sorry, I am so sorry
00:06:36On the honeymoon it had been really intense like I can't even describe how intense like this whole process is I
00:06:43Had a blip I had a wobbly I had it, you know as they say pressure burst pipes and my pipe burst
00:06:50So what are you doing to me? I've prayed
00:06:54I've prayed
00:06:56In my head I'm thinking why
00:06:59She's done
00:07:00You know, I mean, I wasn't I just knew I needed to get away. I have a tendency maybe to kind of run when I feel
00:07:08Too stressed. It was just so intense like I couldn't think do you know what I mean?
00:07:11I just felt like I need to pull away. It was just getting too much
00:07:15I don't generally tend to trust a lot of people once the trust is gone. It's gone
00:07:21I went home and I just you know, it's wait to a couple of friends
00:07:25I was able to process my thoughts and I was able to put things everything into perspective. How are you feeling like now?
00:07:32I'm glad to see you. I had missed you. I
00:07:36Can't deny it like I do like you
00:07:41I've missed you so much like like so much. I'm really sorry. I feel really really bad
00:07:49Opening the door this morning and seeing Rochelle there
00:07:53It just made me feel like yes, she does care and no I can't control my excitement
00:08:10Tonight the newlyweds will face their first commitment ceremony
00:08:15Where they will decide if they want to stay in the experiment or walk away from the marriage
00:08:22You
00:08:52You
00:09:14Welcome to your very first commitment ceremony
00:09:18Today is where the hard work really starts
00:09:25You all have a huge decision to make tonight
00:09:28let me remind you that a couple can only leave the experiment if you both right leave if
00:09:35One person wants to stay the couple must stay within the experiment until the next commitment ceremony
00:09:43Remember that the more open and truthful you are
00:09:46The more you will benefit from the process we're really looking forward to getting started
00:09:58First up to the couch we have Christina and Kieran
00:10:06Don't be nervous we don't bite nervous not nervous at all
00:10:12Talk me through your wedding day. How was that?
00:10:17Magic
00:10:18unbelievable
00:10:19Would you say you felt a connection straight away?
00:10:23Yeah, I felt like I've got the short end of the stick literally
00:10:32To have somebody that has this amazing six-foot personality
00:10:37That he is and it just made me feel instantly at ease like I was buzzing
00:10:45You both went on to your honeymoon we did what was that experience like
00:10:50amazing I
00:10:52Realized how Karen she was she's got a massive fun side massive fan of music
00:10:57I don't know another girl in this world who wakes up at 6 and puts trance on
00:11:00It sounds like you're okay with that
00:11:12If she's happy I'm happy if she's happy with transit 6 o'clock in the morning you do you
00:11:21There's some really good body language you guys are sitting very close to one. Oh my god. You seem very comfortable with one another
00:11:30Did intimacy kind of wouldn't you like to know
00:11:46The intimacy is definitely there and it's really refreshing isn't it is is that even how you
00:11:54Know
00:11:59Okay, so what would you like advice on
00:12:07I overthink and I take things very personally don't I but I think it's just because I care so much
00:12:15How do I get out of this like
00:12:18Over sensitive over thinking like headspace because it affects me and it does affect Karen
00:12:27You've made a great start here
00:12:28You know you you're showing that you're aware that you do get into that spiral of overthinking
00:12:33The next step is to stop it as it's happening. I
00:12:37Just wonder if you were to try this this week when you do start overthinking to say to Kieran. I'm doing it
00:12:44I'm overthinking and then you can actually discuss it together, and it becomes less of a problem. Yeah, that's a good idea
00:12:51Thanks, Mel. Give it a try
00:12:53I've got you. I've got you
00:12:55Let's move on to the decisions now
00:13:01So I've
00:13:03Chosen this word
00:13:06Because I can't wait to see what is to come for us
00:13:11So I've chosen
00:13:24And Kieran, what's your decision? I've never met anyone as
00:13:30loud in the best way possible as
00:13:32Bright as colorful as funny as outrageous
00:13:38So for that reason Christina, you're amazing and I've wrote Steve
00:13:50Continue to have lots of fun and of course lots of intimacy. Oh, yeah
00:14:07And next up to the couch Polly and Adam
00:14:21I'm gonna get straight to the point
00:14:24When you met did you feel you were each other's type I
00:14:30Feel like for me it was there. I just don't feel that was reciprocated
00:14:37It's a tricky one obviously she really fancies me and I want to say I want to say it back to you
00:14:43No, I mean, but I can't
00:14:47She's not like my usual type but I'm hers like don't get me wrong
00:14:51She's a good-looking girl and we got on like a house on fire, but I just feel bad for her
00:14:58What's your usual type my usual types normally like dark features petite brunette
00:15:07It seems as if what you are actually doing is
00:15:12Pushing yourself away from her and you're labeling it as this type thing
00:15:18What you could do is you could understand that you are in an unnatural experiment. Why not go all in?
00:15:27Because what you're doing right now is you're actually hurting her even more
00:15:32When you said I feel bad for her I was like nah, I feel bad for you my man
00:15:37You were setting yourself up to miss out on an incredible opportunity
00:15:43Holly how's all of this feeling for you?
00:15:48It's not great because obviously I know that I'm not sorry
00:16:07Because I know that I'm not we normally go for however, like I know that everything else is there and it's hard because
00:16:15I'm not
00:16:17I'm not
00:16:19I'm not
00:16:21I'm not
00:16:23I'm not
00:16:25I'm not
00:16:27I'm not
00:16:29I'm not
00:16:31I'm not
00:16:33I'm not
00:16:35And it's hard because I'm like, why are you not doing what you should be doing if you're saying all of this stuff
00:16:42It's so confusing
00:16:46Seeing all the other couples and that say like I really fancy him like I can't say that to her
00:16:53Why can't you do that
00:16:56If I'm affectionate with her and cuddly and kissy with her I don't want to give it the wrong idea
00:17:00I don't want to hurt
00:17:03But you're married and you've had sex
00:17:20That felt natural at the time, you know, I mean, it's nonsense my man
00:17:23It's like you want to swim in the pool, but you don't want to get wet
00:17:26How does it feel for you Polly knowing that the two of you have been intimate and now you've gone back to the friendzone I
00:17:35Mean it's not ideal because I think when I'm in a relationship I am very
00:17:40Sexually driven towards someone like that's just natural, isn't it?
00:17:43And I haven't pushed that because I'm not having the reject from someone again
00:17:48In my last relationship I was rejected so much to the point now
00:17:52Where I'm not giving anything to anyone. I'm not forcing it. I don't want if I've got a faucet then it's not there
00:17:58and I shouldn't have to tell him to do something because he should want to do it and
00:18:04He's not
00:18:07You're not showing me anything that you like me at all apart from just being a nice person
00:18:17Adam what do you think?
00:18:19Adam what do you think it is? That's holding you back. I've always said like I'm not perfect
00:18:25But I am perfect for someone so I want someone who's perfect for me
00:18:32You have this incredible woman sitting next to you not only is she gorgeous she connects with you
00:18:39You have fun together, but you're sitting here and saying I want perfection. I
00:18:43Don't look and think like she's not attractive anything like she's an attractive woman. Yes, it's just there's that little bit of something missing
00:18:55My sense is Adam that you're you're holding back
00:18:59you know for whatever reason you're not allowing yourself to
00:19:03to really open up and
00:19:06Experience everything that you could be experiencing here with Polly
00:19:09Experience everything that you could be experiencing here with Polly
00:19:14Yeah, I agree
00:19:17Just don't like talking about my emotions and like I don't want to get hurt
00:19:21You know I mean like I always worry about getting hurt if you listen to what Polly's saying she's saying that too
00:19:26I don't want to be hurt
00:19:30All right, let's go to the decision
00:19:35Please Polly first
00:19:40So it's still so early there's still so much to work on so I put stay for now
00:19:52Adam
00:19:55I do feel a little bit of pressure, and I don't want to hurt
00:20:01Attraction it's not something I can force
00:20:04But can't say a bad word about you, so
00:20:09I've decided to stay
00:20:16All right you guys well, thank you
00:20:26Next up Sasha and Ross
00:20:29Let's go back to the wedding day
00:20:33Best day ever
00:20:36What did you think when you first saw Ross and I thought thank God he's tall and thank God he's hench
00:20:43So by the end of the day do you feel like you were attracted to each other oh
00:20:47I felt like I was attracted to him
00:20:49I felt like I was attracted to him. I felt like I was attracted to him. I felt like I was attracted to him
00:20:54So by the end of the day do you feel like you were attracted to each other
00:21:04I love that. I love that. I just bought none of it. It's my
00:21:09My that's an unbelievable. Yeah, I definitely thought he was fit from the get-go, but like I wouldn't straightaway be all over someone I
00:21:18Understand that you talked about your celibacy yeah
00:21:22What does celibacy mean to you celibacy is a decision not to sleep with someone
00:21:28Casually it'd be someone when I'm in a relationship, and I feel like the serious about me. Okay, that is abstinence
00:21:37You are holding sex until you are with someone that you fully trust yeah
00:21:44Ross what are your thoughts about having these kind of conversations?
00:21:49I've expected it didn't and I respect her honesty and to take the lead. No, what should they?
00:21:58So now talk us through the honeymoon. We had the best honeymoon
00:22:03It was really shocking how how quickly you can really like someone
00:22:10Ross just made me feel really
00:22:13emotionally safe and
00:22:15comfortable and
00:22:17He was literally everything I asked for and more I don't know where you got it so good and
00:22:22Yeah, we just both said like we couldn't even imagine spending a day apart now
00:22:27We come back from the honeymoon, and we was like I don't ever want to be away from you
00:22:33Ross what did you learn about?
00:22:35Sasha
00:22:37For me obviously I'm deaf eyes for the communication
00:22:40It's a bad thing for me when she doesn't to a big word and then she adapts it for me in the face
00:22:47They were so I couldn't understand. I'm a rock marks my heart. You know I know I've got a good one
00:22:53Yes, very lucky. I've never felt like this safe in a relationship ever oh
00:23:00Our work is done
00:23:06That's wonderful, so let's go to a decision
00:23:10We will begin with Ross. I think I'm amazing
00:23:15ball I
00:23:17shouldn't
00:23:18stay
00:23:24Sasha I can't believe I've come into this and found Ross and Ross was literally everything I asked for and
00:23:32more and
00:23:33So yeah
00:23:36Stay
00:23:41Continue to make each other feel safe and this union will last forever. Thank you
00:23:57Next up we have Eve and Charlie
00:24:01I
00:24:07Welcome welcome
00:24:09so now
00:24:11The end of the honeymoon was tumultuous for you both right, but last night united front. How do you feel in this moment?
00:24:20and I
00:24:22Mean my feelings have been there since the first day. I'm well and truly in
00:24:29Eve how are we feeling not maybe where I was at the start, but
00:24:41You've got this Eve come on
00:24:51So
00:24:53Not where we were at the start, but a lot better than
00:24:56Sorry, where we were in the honeymoon
00:25:00Okay, okay, let's go to the beginning
00:25:04Okay, let's go to the wedding. How do we feel that day? Oh brilliant really really good
00:25:09Really good
00:25:11Charlie what do you think?
00:25:13Literally as soon as I clocked eyes with her like I was just like oh my god
00:25:24And
00:25:26Yeah, I just felt this just instant connection with her Wow. So first day incredible. Yeah, ten out of ten. Yep
00:25:35When do you believe the first issue was apparent
00:25:41Well, you've had said that she felt like I was being mean to her on the honeymoon I
00:25:45Was quite taken back by that because I wasn't I didn't understand like I think I'm very passionate
00:25:51Like when I speak and like I can be very expression. Uh, and I've got a very loud voice
00:25:56Eve did you say she was me or okay, so it came across to describe what it was
00:26:02It hadn't been a good few days and I was I wasn't saying I'm sorry
00:26:05I just hate all this stuff and I don't want to make her look like a bad person. She's not
00:26:10So like we had we had a couple of bad days and then
00:26:15When we were big talking about it, I just I was walking make sure so I didn't want things to get any worse
00:26:21I had like I just I just don't want to be I just feel like I want to disappear when like that's happening
00:26:27And it just says Charlie. Do you think you're mean to me sometimes?
00:26:30Then I got heated. She raised her voice. I just I just says I'm not doing this
00:26:34And the guy know
00:26:36When she gets annoyed and stuff, I know I'm not gonna like shout back at her. Do you know what I mean?
00:26:41No exactly what you mean
00:26:43Did you two ever come back and resolve that
00:26:48that's when I feel like Eve sort of went a bit inside herself and
00:26:53The barrier came up and there was no way of communicating at that point
00:26:59That moment where you began to realize that there are communication differences between the two of you
00:27:05Yeah
00:27:06We had a really big fate native for a honeymoon to the extent where I moved out and we haven't kissed since that day
00:27:12We haven't kissed in a week. I caught
00:27:14everything
00:27:16What did you scream at me? Yeah, I know
00:27:19Fucking prick. Fuck you. I'm leaving this fucking experiment in front of the whole
00:27:24Restaurant top out of all the time. I did it and she even took off her wedding ring through it notion that night, didn't he?
00:27:30It's just too much
00:27:32And then you hit eject. Yeah, because it because it's too much and
00:27:36Then when you come back
00:27:38You two don't resolve the issue and then it compounds so then there's another issue on top of another issue on top of another issue
00:27:45Yeah
00:27:47I have a couple thoughts here. You definitely have distinct communication styles
00:27:53Eve you'd like to walk away
00:27:54Charlie's like no, let's finish this right now. That is well intentioned, but that is bad advice to follow
00:28:03Eve you have to say give me 20 minutes and
00:28:07Then we will come back and we will talk about this particular topic. Otherwise, you are leaving her in limbo
00:28:15Charlie I do feel like also you have to make sure that your response is a response where your partner wants to come
00:28:23And resolve the situation. Yes, I think I did lose myself a little bit on the honeymoon
00:28:28I kind of went back to like
00:28:31You're right
00:28:33Okay, I
00:28:34Found myself like becoming the old Charlie again, which was like lonely and rejected and I
00:28:43Felt just really like insecure and angry and upset that we hadn't been able to
00:28:50talk
00:28:52But I feel like there's a fear of abandonment. I think that's what we're seeing with both of you
00:28:58Eve you go into your shell and we see with you Charlie that you react
00:29:03Yeah, yeah, I'm scared because a lot of that comes from like
00:29:07Abandonment of my dad and yeah, I was really lonely
00:29:12You told me that I know I just feel like we never had we haven't had the chance to have these conversations yet
00:29:18This is the beauty of this journey. Everyone comes in thinking. Okay, it's about my marriage
00:29:23It really is about your individual journey and about how you can
00:29:29Heal trauma and as a result of healing the trauma show up for your partner in a better way I
00:29:36Just really find it hard getting my head around somebody speaking to me because that hasn't happened to me in so long
00:29:42How you resolve the conflict will dictate whether or not you will stay in your marriage period
00:29:52We need a decision Charlie first
00:29:55And
00:29:58I want to give this a hundred percent. Like I really feel like we have something special and
00:30:03And I want to work on myself to be better for you
00:30:07so
00:30:12With a smiley face and kisses
00:30:18So
00:30:21If you need a decision
00:30:42So Eve we need a decision
00:30:45Um, so yeah, it's there's a way to rocky start
00:30:58But I do feel like we had a fresh start yesterday and that's what it feels like
00:31:03I'm just gonna leave it there. I'm staying
00:31:06I'm just gonna leave it there. I'm staying
00:31:14All right, well, there's no doubt you have a lot of love for you in this room
00:31:18Yeah, so continue to work on that communication. You're gonna go far. Okay. All right. Thank you so much
00:31:24Thanks guys
00:31:35Next up to the couch we have Nathan and Lacey
00:31:46Good to see the two of you
00:31:48See you
00:31:50Talk me through your first impressions when you met each other at the wedding
00:31:55Yes, she's a very good-looking
00:31:58Yeah, no, I was happy
00:32:00Yeah, when I first saw Nathan I thought rocky salt my time
00:32:09And then in terms of the honeymoon what was that experience like it was really really fun we had this wicked time
00:32:16Yeah, it was meant it's not my best friends, yeah
00:32:21The way we laugh together and dance in the room I can just be myself like I'm the best mate I fancy
00:32:27You know, so it sounds like it was all quite positive. Yeah
00:32:31Were there any areas that weren't so great for the two of you? So I found him hard to read sometimes
00:32:40If I'm interested in someone like actions for me speak louder than words
00:32:43So I just thought show that in like a physical affection way, but I do like to hear it
00:32:51He's vocabulary would be very short. Yeah a lot on the spot on the spot, right and and it made me feel rejected I
00:33:01Don't necessarily pick my words right sometimes like I might not
00:33:05Pick up what she said. I might go. Oh cool, you know
00:33:10It was like a slap to the face, yeah
00:33:12But it's nothing that I would mean intentionally, you know, because I've got ADHD as well. Sometimes I process things and it's a lot
00:33:20So Lacey, have you ever had a boyfriend who was neurodivergent before my twin sister has a JHD
00:33:28So I've had a family member like that, but I've never actually dated
00:33:32Someone like that, right and it's all different right because you can get ADHD where you're quite loud. You're quite vocal
00:33:38Whereas me I'm very active upstairs and I have to always be doing stuff keep busy. He's like
00:33:44told me about his ADHD and
00:33:46Told me a few things he does
00:33:48Sometimes he daydreams. So if he didn't tell me that I'm I thought he's not interested now. It's made me aware. I
00:33:55know
00:33:56You're into me, but he's just mine somewhere else, but he'll come back to me exactly when you're neurodivergent
00:34:02Process information. Yeah, so the key is to continue to educate yourself and Nathan
00:34:08This is where you can help to educate Lacey, right? This is great when you're learning together. That's actually very sexy
00:34:13Since we've come back
00:34:15I've not even had to question
00:34:18How he feels I know how he feels
00:34:21He's straight in my hair for me
00:34:23He bought me breakfast in bed. That means so much to me. So I'm pretty happy
00:34:28Oh
00:34:31Well, it sounds like the two of you are in a really positive space, yeah, let's go to the decision
00:34:41Obviously, I'm quite happy with the way things going at the moment. I just like to continue and see where it goes
00:34:51And Lacey what's your decision? Yeah, I'm really happy you've done good
00:34:58So I've chosen stay
00:35:04Thank you so much guys have fun for the rest of the week, thank you so much
00:35:17And next up we have Rochelle and awesome
00:35:29Hello and
00:35:31Welcome back Rochelle. Thank you
00:35:34We missed you at the dinner party last night
00:35:37Yeah
00:35:38Well, look, let's focus on the two of you as a couple
00:35:43Why don't you take me back to the wedding day?
00:35:48Awesome what was it like for you when you turned around and saw this woman? I
00:35:53Was stopped for words
00:35:55And I'm like, hi this I'm awesome and I'm petition and then she was like
00:36:01I'm Guyanese
00:36:03So straight away there was that connection of culture. So I felt like right this is gonna be amazing
00:36:10I'm Rochelle. Did you feel that connection initially? Yes. Yes. Definitely. It was a relief actually when I heard his accent
00:36:17It was definitely like, okay, we're both Caribbean. I like the cultural theme that he injected into the wedding
00:36:24As the day progressed what more did you learn about each other I
00:36:29Learned that he's quite rules-based. I mean that came up
00:36:34So that felt quite different from your style yes, right. Yes, I don't like rules
00:36:43In my life, I'm quite structured like I grew up playing cricket. So it's always rules based, you know
00:36:50Everything I do in terms of work is like rules based and I thought okay, we're gonna put heads here
00:36:58This is one of the the big relationship challenges, I think that's come up for you guys really early
00:37:03What we're talking about here are two quite different approaches to life really
00:37:12Doesn't mean it can't work. In fact, it can work beautifully from a complimentary perspective
00:37:17How did that theme continue to play out and what did you learn about yourselves?
00:37:23He's a lot more comfortable
00:37:25talking openly about his feelings
00:37:28And I'm a little bit more reserved
00:37:30But I do think that I you know, I show it I do. I think I demonstrate I think you know
00:37:36You know that I like you
00:37:39And so from your perspective
00:37:41Did you notice Rochelle's walls dropping as the honeymoon went on was she opening up more to you I
00:37:51Could see changes, you know one day
00:37:53I think she was out for a couple of hours and she came back in and she goes I came back because I missed my
00:37:59husband
00:38:01She
00:38:05Showed me that she cared and I feel like I was getting little feels
00:38:14Rochelle you look really uncomfortable
00:38:18It's not feeling uncomfortable it's more just I
00:38:23Guess I always kind of just want to dig deeper like why you know
00:38:29Why would he say respectful things about you I guess just how genuine he is
00:38:40It feels like too much too soon a bit a bit
00:38:46It sounds like pace is a bit of a theme here. Yeah
00:38:50Yeah
00:38:52Ordinarily, I'm at home. I'm sort of in my sort of peaceful safe place
00:38:56So I've stepped out of that and it's definitely taking me a while to sort of process my thoughts because there's a lot
00:39:02It's a sort of process. It's like a huge adjustment. Yeah
00:39:06So in addition to learning about each other's pace
00:39:09You're also learning about each other's space
00:39:13Really important to bring this into the relationship because I can hear Rochelle that you need that
00:39:18You're very independent
00:39:19But also you need to make sure that you're doing that in such a way that you're not making awesome feel rejected. Yeah, Rochelle you
00:39:27Don't necessarily trust immediately, right? Now. There's a famous quote and that is trust
00:39:34But verify I don't live by that. I live by verify then trust
00:39:41And I think that's what you're trying to do right here. I
00:39:44Have to say having been through this process many many times now I
00:39:50Know how hard it is
00:39:52I've seen so many people struggle with this process and I guess one of the
00:39:57Really tough lessons that a lot of people learn is that you must let go of all control
00:40:02And I wonder if that's something that's that's been tough for you Rochelle
00:40:06It's one of these ones where it's so early on and I've been single for so long
00:40:12And also like
00:40:15Just doing it all in the spotlight, you know, it's the cameras the point I want to grab for you
00:40:20Yeah, because this is the point that's not going to change
00:40:26This relationship is not gonna have a chance if you're not fully committed to the process
00:40:35Everyone in this room has had a point where they wanted to go home, but they stayed
00:40:41You cannot drop in and out of this experiment. You're in or you're out
00:41:03You cannot drop in and out of this experiment you're in or you're out
00:41:12Let's go to the decision
00:41:16Awesome we'll go to you first
00:41:19So I've been matched with someone who has a lot of the characteristics that I asked for
00:41:28Independent beautiful family orientated
00:41:34So on that note I've chosen to
00:41:40Hey
00:41:47Michelle I mean it has been an intense full-on week
00:41:55You know, I'm fully aware that
00:41:58Running off home as soon as it got too much for me was a selfish move and I am really sorry that I left you
00:42:04in the lurch
00:42:09So
00:42:34Next up to the couch we have Emma and Casper
00:42:40Hello
00:42:45How are we doing
00:42:49We're better than what we were but we're still not quite friends yet, are we no
00:42:58It's been difficult
00:43:04So take me back to the wedding when you first met each other
00:43:09Emil do you like to say something? I
00:43:12actually
00:43:13Wasn't nervous. I was like, this is the right thing to do. We're in this I'm excited
00:43:18We're here and I walked down the aisle and there he was. Yeah, I was I was happy
00:43:26So Casper, what's your first impressions of Emma I saw the big smile and the energy was was my first impression
00:43:35But my biggest issue on the wedding day more than anything else
00:43:40Emma's got quite a few mannerisms and
00:43:44Sort of character traits that my sister has
00:43:49That's weird Joey like you're looking at your new wife and your twin sister you're going they're very very similar
00:43:57But
00:43:59You've now had some time to get to know Emma
00:44:03Yeah, those character traits are still very similar to my sisters and I've got it. I'm fully aware. I've got to try and
00:44:09Separate the two. Well, it sounds like that was one of the biggest challenges for you to bypass that. It's one of the challenges. Yeah, I
00:44:17Mean, there's quite a few. I mean quite a few
00:44:20I'm
00:44:24Struggling at the moment with not being able to see
00:44:28The matching process and how we've come to be sitting here on the sofa
00:44:32together I
00:44:34Think Casper though. This is quite early on in the process, isn't it?
00:44:37So do you feel like you've given it enough time to develop and get to know one another?
00:44:43I'm still here. You know, I haven't run for the hills
00:44:47Okay, Emma, can you talk me through the honeymoon how was that experience?
00:44:54Yeah, so on on the first night
00:45:00Casper said well, I don't find you attractive because I don't find curvy girls attractive
00:45:08Which
00:45:12Was a bit of a shock for me because I'm very confident like I'm hardly in like an ogre right I'm like a normal
00:45:21Normal girl and I wear that, you know, I'm never gonna be skinny never will be love a wine love a crisp
00:45:26I woke up the next day and I imagined my fucking friends hearing that right
00:45:32Putting so much into this process
00:45:34Okay, thanks. Thanks so much into this process
00:45:45And I said if you found me like sexy at all like I felt a million bucks my wedding dress like
00:45:52And he just said no
00:45:57So we had a conversation about it the next day and I got a bit like
00:46:01You know got a bit fucking fierce the next day cuz I was like no my friends wouldn't stand for that
00:46:11And then Casper stormed off and moved out
00:46:18Casper would you like to shed some light on what had happened there?
00:46:23Ever told me that you know, I was her type on the wedding day, you know, but I wasn't feeling it
00:46:32Hadn't found a sexy I had seen some of the mannerisms with my sister as well
00:46:38I tried to in the nicest way possible
00:46:43You know, I failed at that
00:46:46So were you worried about Emma's feelings? Yes
00:46:51But can you see how hurtful it might be to say to your partner that I'm not into curvy girls
00:46:58Can you hear how that could land?
00:47:01Yes, no, obviously, yeah
00:47:04But I'm if I lied would that be better?
00:47:10I don't understand how the process got me to Emma
00:47:20We're so different on so many levels I don't understand
00:47:27I
00:47:30Don't get it and it's really frustrating cuz this is my life if I can with it
00:47:49I'm confused. I don't understand how the process got me to Emma
00:47:57We're so different on so many levels I don't understand I
00:48:02Don't get it and it's really frustrating. This is my life if I can with it
00:48:09Emma how do you feel about hearing cast to say this?
00:48:15We do have different mindsets I'm a glass half-full always will be Casper's a glass half empty
00:48:22It's just negative all the time
00:48:26Let's talk about some serious things, okay
00:48:30First is in 15 years of matchmaking
00:48:34There is no one that questions their match unless they are not physically attracted to their match
00:48:41Can you admit that?
00:48:43It starts a day
00:48:45Because if the physical attraction is high you look for all of the reasons why you are matched
00:48:52When the physical attraction is low you begin to look for all of the reasons how we got together
00:48:58Now, let's talk about the reasons why we matched you
00:49:03We test everything that you can think of you both have the same exact
00:49:09Disorganized attachment style. It means that you exhibit a little secure you exhibit a little anxious you exhibit a little avoidant
00:49:18There's
00:49:21Many different measures that add up to why you not only should be together, but why you are strong together
00:49:33This isn't anywhere near where I wanted to be I
00:49:38Came in with
00:49:40All the hopes everyone did, you know, I'm here to find love
00:49:43So I really hoped that we wouldn't be sitting here like this, you know
00:49:48Do you feel that over the next week you could maybe work together on just building a friendship?
00:49:56Yeah, yeah
00:50:05Should we go to the decisions? Let's start with Emma
00:50:12And so I didn't want to give up on the first hurdle so it's day
00:50:19And Casper, what's your decision?
00:50:26I'm not happy but at the same time I've got shit to learn
00:50:33But I've had a lot going on in my head and you know, we've been waiting for this conversation it's not been easy
00:50:40But
00:50:46Yeah, I wrote stay as well
00:51:06And last up on the couch we have Holly and Alex
00:51:10I
00:51:20Okay, thank you both for joining us can we start at the wedding
00:51:25It was lit it was lit. Yeah. What else do we have Holly? What else was it?
00:51:32It's alright Holly
00:51:35You got this
00:51:38Right now I feel like it was a dream
00:51:41I
00:51:43Okay, okay
00:51:46So that first day together was special
00:51:52Alex when you turned and you saw Holly what immediately came to mind
00:51:59When she walked down
00:52:01Yeah in the beautiful white dress
00:52:05You know dark features curvy
00:52:08Dangerous eyes
00:52:10everything I asked for
00:52:12It was all there. Yeah, and then more and more
00:52:16So day one great. What happened between that moment and today?
00:52:23That's not who I married
00:52:30Say with no ring on right now, but once the bow
00:52:33But I'll go to the wedding day you asked me about how to win they was so I'm gonna tell him how to win
00:52:37Where's wedding ring? I don't know in my bag. I think cuz you disrespectful and you're very childish
00:52:43That's more name-calling. Yes, cuz you are a child Alex. I'm not and I have got two children. I am NOT about to have three
00:52:53Yeah, don't be smart with me but at this point because don't even go there I'll go there
00:52:58Go on
00:53:00Listen what you mean? Let's go. Let's go ready to rumble. This is the problem. You speak to me like I'm a boy in the street
00:53:08Trust me if this was not this process trust me you would have been ghosted
00:53:19Why is that wrong though, because I'm just saying if I don't like what I'm seeing I'm not gonna make time for it
00:53:25What you just said is ridiculously immature
00:53:32The issue that I can see Holly has right now she's like, where's your ring? How could I trust you?
00:53:40When you guys get into conflict it just
00:53:43Escalates and there's like a kind of a power
00:53:47Battle that goes on where you go in and I think this is probably old patterns of behavior
00:53:52That you guys are bringing into this relationship
00:53:57Okay, so let's talk about this
00:54:01When you walked into the dinner party what I thought was really interesting is that you were saying we're good we're good
00:54:07Yeah, and then there was a red flag
00:54:12What was the red flag
00:54:14He'd asked the guys on the stag do if they wasn't happy with their woman
00:54:19Would they basically do a u-turn somebody else
00:54:26Alex had actually turned around and said I would go with someone else if if I don't like my wife
00:54:34For me that was a really shitty comment
00:54:39It made me feel like so am I on trial now like
00:54:44Am I here until something better comes along and if I mess up then that's what you're gonna do like
00:54:54Alex is the first guy who's
00:54:57Don't know if you can remember I did a conversation on the gas I did
00:55:05And he's the first guy to compliment me
00:55:13Why I hate the situation I'm in because it doesn't make me feel beautiful
00:55:20No one's ever done that
00:55:26I'm a fragile person I
00:55:30Break easy and that's just because I have a lot of love to give but I'm scared to give it to the wrong person again
00:55:37I
00:55:42Did I knew I was getting married to somebody I didn't know that person was gonna be I did not know that Holly existed
00:55:49So my answer was neither here nor there because the answer is only relevant if I wasn't happy
00:55:56Okay, so what would you like to hear from her it's not there's nothing I really want to hear from her
00:56:01It's more how it was handled
00:56:04You're telling me behind closed doors, I've got your back
00:56:07Then when there's a crowd you're giving it the big and having these conversations
00:56:11Like being overtly loud and why not address that with me in private?
00:56:18To me you're trying to make me look bad now
00:56:21So now that that messes with my I don't know moral compass
00:56:25I'll say right for me. That's betrayal because you could have addressed that with me in private
00:56:31How do we put this topic to rest your concern was that he wasn't serious about the process
00:56:37So then Holly, what do you need to hear from your partner to be able to resolve that?
00:56:45I'd rather just put it to bed
00:56:48You are I can see right now. You're still mad on this
00:56:51But you rather just put it to bed instead of let's deal with it
00:57:00What is very clear is that there is a communication issue
00:57:04as
00:57:05Long as both of you want to be the only one who's right
00:57:11This thing is going nowhere
00:57:13But the moment someone is willing to say how can we meet in the middle of this?
00:57:18Right, if you can't do that, you can't be in a relationship
00:57:22Can I just also add both of you have to take responsibility for what you contribute to this conflict because you're both keeping it alive
00:57:33You're both contributing you both need to change
00:57:39For every moment that you're in the experiment you fight for your relationship, but that's if you decide to stay
00:57:46So
00:57:49Let's find out if you'll be working on the marriage for another week or if you'll be leaving us
00:58:00So for me
00:58:02I
00:58:13Just forget all the talking I just give you my decision leave
00:58:24Okay
00:58:27Yeah, I've known you for 10 days I would never be putting up with this
00:58:30In a normal situation, so I'm not gonna put with it now
00:58:36Holly
00:58:43We'll start off I actually put stay
00:58:51I
00:58:54Said to stay because there was a reason I was matched with Alex and
00:58:58I'm a mom. Listen, you never give up when you're a mom you fight for life
00:59:03Oh, so I wanted love if I have to fight for it, then that's what I'm gonna do
00:59:09So it's done
00:59:12You've written stay
00:59:13You've written leave
00:59:15you two must stay in the experiment for another week and
00:59:21Continue to work on your relationship
00:59:25You Alex if you do not want to stay I will respect your decision, I'm not gonna force you to be around there
00:59:37This is a communication issue
00:59:41This is less severe and some of the issues that the other couples are dealing with right now
00:59:48So Alex
00:59:51Can we count on you to fight for another week?
00:59:54I
01:00:00Just do what you want today
01:00:09I'll give it a go. I'll give it a go. Give it a go. Thank you
01:00:18Now we know for sure you both have a lot of work to do so fight for this marriage
01:00:24Okay, fight for it. Thank you
01:00:34Next time
01:00:35Envelope a brand new task in the shape of experts week. Am I too much for you throws up tough questions
01:00:42Slightly what can I do for you to fully trust me?
01:00:47They collide the text test and the experts get hands-on
01:00:51Why do you think you chose her body to focus on with the couples most in crisis?
01:00:56I didn't want to lie. You're never gonna want to rip my clothes off. Are you?
01:01:01This is what annoys me. They're talking over me
01:01:03If by the time you finish what you're saying, we're not speaking if this marriage isn't working out
01:01:08Then I'm gonna close the door, but it's Eve's failure to take part
01:01:12You couldn't even just write something you think with me every say
01:01:18That spells danger for an already troubled marriage
01:01:23I don't think we're healthy for each other. I'm laying my heart out on the line here
01:01:41You