The Final ABC/CBS/NBC/FOX Split Screen Credits For The Year 2024 (Part 3)
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00:00Let me be your beard. I can't let you do that. Kyle, I owe you so much. I didn't get where I am today because of talent. I got here because of you and that big gay heart of yours.
00:20You calling your lawyer? Just waiting on the next commercial break.
00:31CBS Next 60 Minutes 2
00:34Think trains are safe? Then why are they crashing at the rate of one every 24 hours? The answer may surprise you.
00:40Plus, they're called the Lost Boys, one of the largest resettlements of war orphans in American history.
00:46We've never seen anything quite like it. But you will on 60 Minutes 2. Next.
00:51Is this woman a witness to a murder or insane?
00:54She escaped from our local mud house.
00:56Something's wrong.
00:57I'm not crazy! I saw a murder!
00:59An all-new Hack. Today, a party for Chief Mannion's godson...
01:03Make a wish, champ.
01:04...becomes an unimaginable crime scene.
01:06Ricky Tuck.
01:07Next is who?
01:08A new district after Hack, CBS Saturday.
01:17From the Vatican to the Austrian Outback comes the missing chapter of one of television's most memorable events.
01:23You said you loved me.
01:24I said you loved me.
01:25I didn't lie to you.
01:26Richard Chamberlain stars in The Thorn Birds, The Missing News.
01:30Coming Sunday, February 11th.
01:33Stick around for the lead show with David Letterman.
01:35Tonight, actor Jay Thomas and Super Bowl MVP Larry Brown.
01:38Thanks for watching CBS. Now stay tuned for your local news.
01:54♪♪
02:06Dozens of retired people lose their savings and maybe their homes.
02:10Then a fascinating look at energy technology of the future.
02:13It's in use here today.
02:15And an inventor hopes we'll all have to spray his product on our leaves.
02:20Ten minutes of non-Stollmark Entertainment invites you to become a part of television history.
02:28When the greatest hero of all comes to life in The Odyssey on NBC.
02:33Your destiny is to do battle.
02:35To become immortal.
02:36You cannot stop me!
02:38You're a clever man.
02:43The action.
02:45The magic.
02:47The Wonders. The Odyssey on NBC.
02:53Next Friday, don't miss the return of Homicide on NBC.
02:58♪♪
03:01The Dark Knight Batman is now the saint.
03:04Val Kilmer joins Jay tonight along with Liar Liar star Jennifer Tilly.
03:07Your local news is next.
03:10An armed robber who not only lost the loot, but his gun to boot.
03:14We'll learn what other shopkeepers think of a colleague's cool.
03:17And the Volts battle for a playoff spot tonight.
03:19Chris Thomas will have that story in sports.
03:24It's the return of Homicide on NBC.
03:27♪♪
03:30The Dark Knight Batman is now the saint.
03:33Val Kilmer joins Jay tonight along with Liar Liar star Jennifer Tilly.
03:36Your local news is next.
03:38An armed robber who not only lost the loot, but his gun to boot.
03:42We'll learn what other shopkeepers think of a colleague's cool.
03:45And the Volts battle for a playoff spot tonight.
03:48Chris Thomas will have that story in sports.
03:52♪♪
03:58Later on the Tonight Show,
04:00Jay chats with Mystic River's double Oscar nominee Clint Eastwood.
04:04And scores with Charles Barkley.
04:06Plus tunes from Shelby Lynn.
04:08Your local news is next.
04:09Palm Beach County teachers sent a message to the school board through the ballot box.
04:13It's a country in upheaval these missionaries saw at first hand their impressions tonight.
04:17In Istanbul, Turkey, a target for terrorists in News Channel 5's Tim Malloy
04:21found a story before he even got there.
04:24And now, on the Night...
04:25♪♪
04:29Each morning, you wake up and get out of bed.
04:32But this morning, when you pick up the paper,
04:34you're looking at an edition so early, it tells you the future.
04:38The question is, what are you going to do about it?
04:41Now, Gary Hobson will have to answer that question.
04:45Anything can happen.
04:46Early edition, CBS Saturdays this fall.
04:49Four-seven.
04:53Who played Moses in Cecil B. DeMille's epic, The Ten Commandments?
04:57Kirk Douglas.
04:58No, sorry.
04:59Well, he was my choice!
05:05Goliath's a wuss.
05:07Tell me about it.
05:10We'll find out why police are so quiet about the serial sniper this weekend.
05:14More on the search for two car-locked shooters in Fort Wayne.
05:17The governor's approval rating hits an all-time low,
05:19and your heating bill could be going up.
05:22Plus, we'll show you car circles up north.
05:24Nightcast Sunday starts now.
05:29You know, some men, they just know all the right moves.
05:32I think you kind of like me.
05:34Others, not so much.
05:36Yeah, you know, you keep laughing like that, you know,
05:38the odds become slimmer that I'll take you home and have sex with you.
05:41That never stopped him.
05:43Two guys and a girl and Norm are both moving to new times,
05:46starting at 8, 7 Central.
05:47See you Wednesday on ABC.
05:49Come on, man, triple sevens.
05:51Come on, girlfriend!
05:52No, all right.
05:53Here we go, man.
05:54A little half-trick on the sevens.
05:58Come on, man, baby, these new shoes and an outfit.
06:00Oh, no.
06:02Anybody got, like, a quarter?
06:03Who wants to be a millionaire?
06:04The biggest primetime quiz show ever,
06:06coming August 16th to ABC.
06:09Look at my poor baby,
06:10working so hard she can't even make it upstairs.
06:16Come here, come here, baby,
06:17and give your big daddy some sugar.
06:23Starting Friday, the Hughleys move to TGIF
06:26at 830, 730 Central on ABC.
06:34That's the action, the mystery, and the silliness.
06:38Disney's One Saturday Morning,
06:40starring Dunk, the recess gang,
06:42and The Weekenders, ABC Saturdays.
06:48In a world where justice is a game
06:52and power resides with the few,
06:55one woman stands apart.
06:58Kid just puked.
06:59Motherhood will never be the same.
07:04Seriously, it's really gross.
07:07Coming to a television near you,
07:09the Geena Davis Show,
07:11Tuesdays this fall on ABC.
07:15These young women are experiencing the effects of EVD.
07:19EVD!
07:20But what exactly is EVD?
07:22It's like, um...
07:24Okay, stop, okay, stop.
07:26Discover the secret of EVD on Odd Man Out
07:30from the writers of There's Something About Mary.
07:32Fridays this fall on ABC.
07:51Denver at Green Bay.
07:52Monday, 8 Eastern, 5 Pacific.
07:55ABC is America's broadcasting company,
07:57bringing more Americans together
07:59for the best in family entertainment.
08:01Really?
08:02TGIF.
08:03Celebrating its 10th season.
08:05Yes!
08:06Disney's One Saturday Morning.
08:08American Cake's favorite Saturday morning.
08:10Ready for action.
08:11The Wonderful World of Disney.
08:13The longest-running primetime series
08:15on network television.
08:17Oh, no.
08:18You fly, don't bother me.
08:20The best place for family entertainment.
08:22ABC, America's broadcasting company.
08:27From the network that brings you NYPD Blue
08:30comes a provocative new drama
08:32with stories that will make you question what you know.
08:34We need a special investigator
08:36on cases involving criminal abuses of science.
08:38And characters that could change what you believe.
08:41There is a reason you were chosen, Mr. Turner.
08:43Strange World.
08:44Coming Tuesdays with a special preview.
08:46Monday, only on ABC.
08:48Next on Eyewitness News,
08:49Mayor Giuliani under fire
08:50for the way he's dealing with minority leaders.
08:52And what does Monica Lewinsky have to say
08:54about Linda Tripp in her upcoming interview?
08:56Details are next.
08:57Jay's taken on a whole lot of women.
08:59Saturday Night Live's Molly Shannon.
09:01Hey, he may need help from secret weapon Jet Li.
09:03And the country tunes of Tracy Lawrence.
09:05Your local news is next.
09:08Law enforcement land or some other use.
09:10The push gains strength.
09:11Snakes, bobcats, animals missing in northern Michigan.
09:15For asthma sufferers,
09:16how about relief with less side effects?
09:1811 at 11 starts now.
09:22Later on the Tonight Show,
09:23she's been in the news a lot lately.
09:25Pamela Anderson Lee is here.
09:26And there's so much I want to say,
09:28but Jay, well, he only gives me so much time.
09:31Your local news is next.
09:33You'd expect city animal services
09:34to give dogs humane treatment,
09:36but one angry group says that is not the case.
09:39They're victims of war.
09:40Authorities hope Kosovar refugees
09:42headed to Albuquerque won't be victims of crime.
09:45And we'll see which towels stack up with the best.
09:53Good evening, I'm Bob Dollin.
09:54A little boy sitting in a car is shot in the head tonight.
09:57We'll have the very latest on this still-breaking story.
09:59Plus an interview with former L.A. Dodger manager
10:01Tommy Lasorda, still in the hospital,
10:03recovering from heart surgery.
10:05Also, the sometimes deadly policy of police pursuits
10:08by one Southland law enforcement agency
10:10is making a change.
10:11And the red carpet is rolled out on Hollywood Boulevard tonight.
10:14Stars and star watchers turn out tonight
10:17for the opening of a new museum.
10:18We'll take you there live next on Fox 11 News.
10:20I'm in for this.
10:25Hey, hey!
10:26You couldn't have picked a nicer place to come back to?
10:30You can't stop it.
10:36Fox Sunday, the Simpsons saddle up
10:38for the most dangerous show in the West.
10:40Hey, Toro, here's something to gore.
10:42Dad!
10:43And now, honey, Daddy's busy.
10:45Get ready for the wildest rescue ever.
10:47Help him!
10:48They got rodeo clowns?
10:49Is my lipstick even?
10:51Go like this.
10:52And all-new Simpsons.
10:54Then, Dewey becomes a clean freak.
10:57There's germs on it!
10:58And it's driving Lois crazy.
11:00Nothing happened to me.
11:01All-new Malcolm in the Middle
11:03after The Simpsons at 8, 7 Central, Fox Sunday.
11:05Saturday, Mad TV's Boots the Cods.
11:08Now, go on up to your rooms.
11:09I'm very proud of you.
11:11Watch an old pop track,
11:12get a little bit of your brother's pussy.
11:14Third Rock's Brent Stewart guest host.
11:16You know, here in Hollywood,
11:17it's easy to forget who you are sometimes.
11:20This is who I am.
11:21Oh!
11:22On a brand-new Mad TV,
11:23late night Saturday.
11:25Macaulay Culkin.
11:26Yes!
11:27Joe Pesci.
11:28He's back!
11:29And Daniel Stern star.
11:30Uh-oh!
11:31In Home Alone 2.
11:32Presented by Sears Family Theater.
11:34Sunday.
11:35He's passionate.
11:36He's committed.
11:37He's Dylan McDermott,
11:39star of ABC's new series,
11:41The Practice.
11:42You're putting our system before a person's life here!
11:45He really believes it's not about the money.
11:47It's not about the fame.
11:48It's really about helping people.
11:50Ready for trial, Your Honor.
11:52The Practice, airs a week from Tuesday on ABC.
11:55Hello, I'm Ann Schubert.
11:57Sheriff's deputies in Nuevo County
11:58are caught in a standoff with a gunman
12:00who claims to have hostages.
12:02Shots have been fired.
12:03We'll have the latest.
12:04Plus, new clues in the Atlanta nightclub bombings.
12:07The news is next.
12:09On May 23rd,
12:10pleasure becomes power.
12:12Cleopatra, coming to ABC.
12:14I'm Melissa McDermott.
12:15Coming up,
12:16they can withstand grenades and landmines.
12:19Why are these bulletproof limos
12:21becoming the hottest wheels in town?
12:23Next.
12:25Tune in Sunday on ABC,
12:27home of the NBA finals.
12:39Sharon Lawrence and Richard Curtis Starr
12:41in Blue Moon, CBS Next.
12:43I'm just completely in love with your son.
12:45A mother knows when something is wrong.
12:47Richard, don't.
12:48I fell.
12:49But no one...
12:50Don't.
12:51What is your problem?
12:52...could ever imagine...
12:53Did he lie when he said you were the violent one?
12:55...the terrifying truth.
12:56We believe Timmy was the victim of foul play.
12:58Patty Duke,
12:59inspired by actual events when he didn't come home.
13:02CBS Tuesday.