I Tried Every Fast Food Pizza In America #USA #Food #dailymotio #foryou
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00:00In 2023, Americans spent over $40 billion on fast food pizza.
00:05Over half of that $40 billion was spent on just 12 nationally recognized restaurants.
00:10The restaurants that we're talking about today aren't just your standard mom and pop.
00:13So what is fast food pizza?
00:14These restaurants are called QSRs, also known as a quick service restaurant.
00:18They're built for speed and scale.
00:20Are they really that good to consume that much of the market?
00:23It's high time we find a true king.
00:24So today we're going to put all these pizzerias to the test to see which one is the best.
00:28Starting with Papa John's.
00:30This is their classic cheese.
00:32It just smells like, uh, close your eyes.
00:33You're at Chuck E. Cheese right now.
00:35Smell the ball pit right now.
00:36Now that we're at our first stop, let me explain some rules.
00:38To keep things fair, we're eating two pizzas at every stop.
00:40A baseline crust with cheese and whatever their most classic pizza is.
00:43We're then going to rate them on the classic internet tier list
00:46according to the best experience we had overall.
00:49So may the best pizzeria win.
00:51Cheers.
00:53Surprising that there's a crunch in that, but not much.
00:55Solid start. Not so solid, but just a start.
00:57This is their pizza with the works.
00:59We flipped this one over because it fell apart when we were trying to take B-roll of it.
01:03Sometimes when there's too much ingredients,
01:04even though they're better ingredients, better pizza, that happens.
01:07These are not better ingredients.
01:08These are the same average ingredients you get at any other goddamn pizza shop.
01:11What in here is better?
01:12Like the pepperoni?
01:13Um, no.
01:14The flavor of both of these pizzas is like if a violinist was like,
01:17I'm going to play for an arena.
01:19And then they didn't hook their violin up to the goddamn speaker system.
01:23What I'm trying to say is the flavor profile of this is pretty low.
01:26It doesn't taste bad though.
01:28I wanted to clarify that.
01:29It tastes good.
01:30The pizza sauce isn't too sweet, but the flavor to me is just lacking.
01:33Smells better than it tastes.
01:34I wasn't delighted by this experience.
01:36It was a solid flat C.
01:38Yeah, I would go C.
01:39Papa John's C tier moving on.
01:42We're at Jets Pizza.
01:43I've never been here before,
01:44but I do think it's very funny on the boxes that they put so many words.
01:47I think they did that because they couldn't decide what the f*** to say
01:49because their slogan is better because it has to be.
01:52This better be good pizza.
01:54Because it f***ing has to be.
01:55It's a Detroit style pizza, and this is their classic cheese.
01:58Here we go.
01:59Oh god.
02:01That burned the f*** out of me.
02:04I will say it's good.
02:05This is their super special Detroit style pizza.
02:07All right, well, see how special it is.
02:09It's like Spider-Man hanging, dude.
02:11I didn't like that one as much.
02:12That tastes like Chuck E. Cheese pizza for some reason.
02:14100%.
02:15The cheese one was like 10 times better than the super special whatever.
02:18But that said, cheese quality, nice.
02:20Good amount of chew.
02:20They caramelized nicely.
02:22I don't like the sauce.
02:23It's a little too ketchupy of a sauce for me.
02:24I feel like if there was a little more flavor in it, I'd be happier.
02:26But maybe the cheese one is different because I did really enjoy the cheese.
02:29I'll give it a solid B+.
02:31Before I rate this, I heard Jets was known for their ranch.
02:35We'll give you a bottle of ranch.
02:37Where was that?
02:38And then so you just take this guy and you just...
02:42Did that amplify?
02:42It did. It did.
02:43We're not going to sauce everything because Papa John's has that garlic sauce
02:46that gives me even B.
02:48Why did they give us a whole bottle?
02:49And where was this originally?
02:50Smell it.
02:52Jets pizza, B tier, moving on.
02:54Here we go. We're at Blaze.
02:55I will say, visually, this pizza does look better.
02:58I don't like that there's not much puff in the crust.
03:00It feels a little too like commercial pizza.
03:02But on a positive note, the cheese looks legit.
03:04The toppings aren't falling off like the Papa John's one.
03:08The dough is noticeably better.
03:09The next one is some sort of barbecue chicken pizza.
03:11Cheers.
03:12This one should have been cooked a little longer.
03:14I think the cheese one was cooked great.
03:16I do have some critiques.
03:17The flavor is better and more noticeable, but still a little flat.
03:21I do appreciate that this has a crisp bottom, just like me.
03:23The texture of the dough is a little too chewy.
03:25I feel like they could pull back the chewiness by like 10%,
03:28but that's just me being a real d*** about it.
03:30Your tongue touches the bottom, which has that nice like roasted taste.
03:33So Max, my son, I'm watching him eat pizza and he always eats it upside down.
03:36I thought it was weird, but he has a point.
03:38All the toppings are on the top.
03:39Your tongue touches the toppings first.
03:41I mean, it's a thin crust pizza, but when we're eating it,
03:43it reminds me more of a flatbread than an actual pizza.
03:45I want it to be an A.
03:47It's not as bready as most USR pizzas, but it's good.
03:50It was a B+.
03:51You know what? I think this is deserving of a solid B tier.
03:54Little Caesar's number three grossing pizza in America.
03:56But it certainly didn't help them with this undercooked, flaccid, f***ing pizza, now did it?
04:00$4.4 billion. That's what that got you.
04:03He's mad, everyone.
04:05That's just mush.
04:06Yeah, just mushy.
04:07The dough is not good.
04:08Crazy, because the dough is made in a distribution center
04:11that they can then make perfect and ship out to all of their individual stores, right?
04:15And even then, when they had the opportunity to do so en masse, at scale,
04:18with all that money, they f***ed it up.
04:20They didn't put enough salt, they didn't put enough sugar.
04:21How the f*** do you let that happen?
04:23This is called a three-meat treat stuffed crust.
04:26It's all right. It's 100% relying on the saltiness from the bacon.
04:29If this didn't have all the f***ing bacon, pepperoni, pre-made ingredients
04:33that they didn't even make in-house on top to save it,
04:35this pizza would be just as bland.
04:37But it tastes good with the pepperoni and the bacon, right?
04:39That's all you really taste. You're not tasting the pizza.
04:41I'm giving it an F.
04:41I was going to say a D+.
04:43We'll just average this out to essentially a very, very low D.
04:46Congrats. You stayed off the bottom of the barrel barely.
04:49We're at Hungry Howie's.
04:50Supposedly, they were the first to invent the flavored crust pizza.
04:54First one we're starting with is just regular cheese, no flavor crust.
04:57Cheers.
04:59It's very focaccia-like, not pizza-like.
05:01The dough is under-salted too.
05:03That's why they invented the seasoned crust, because the dough is just bland.
05:06Anticipatory, yeah.
05:07Pepperoni pizza with the garlic cheese butter crust.
05:11It does look good.
05:12It smells good.
05:14I like the crust.
05:15The crust is nice.
05:15It's good.
05:16That salty bite I had of the crust was really nice.
05:18Pepperoni's crispy.
05:19It actually wasn't crispy.
05:20It looked crispy, but did not have a single crunch.
05:22Yeah.
05:23Everything else on this pizza is very mid.
05:24I mean, out of all the pizzas we've had so far, the flavored crust is not saving this for me.
05:28This is like a C.
05:29It's C.
05:29Moving on.
05:30We're adding a bonus pizza, the Costco pizza.
05:34It's too important not to include this, okay?
05:36They definitely don't win in the grossing department, because this is not their main business, technically.
05:40But it's Costco pizza.
05:41If we didn't include it, I feel like we'd get yelled at, to be honest with you.
05:44We've got cheese and pepperoni, the only two they offer.
05:46Starting with cheese, ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom, bah.
05:50Ooh, yeah.
05:51Cheapest pizza in the video, tastes identical to many of the pizzas we've had so far.
05:55But look at the ratio of cheese to bread.
05:57There is so much cheese on this.
05:58Damn.
05:59All right, pepperoni.
06:01You know what's funny?
06:02I can barely taste the pepperoni.
06:03The pepperoni is super subtle.
06:05As Andy Herndon would have put this,
06:06It's pretty unoffensive, right?
06:07It's okay.
06:08The sauce isn't too sweet.
06:09It's undersalted, though.
06:10Not that flavorful.
06:11There's a lot of cheese, but it doesn't taste like much.
06:14I mean, with overall experience, I'm paying $9.99 for one large pie.
06:17That's a good point.
06:18It's a good point.
06:19For the quality of that price, I'm giving this a B.
06:22B for bang for your buck.
06:23Yeah, you know what?
06:24I agree.
06:25B.
06:26Costco, I miss the Supreme.
06:27Bring it back.
06:28Costco, good work.
06:29B tier.
06:30Moving on.
06:31Our next stop is Godfather's in Houston, Texas,
06:32but I'm not going back there unless I absolutely have to.
06:33So it's time to bring in the big guns.
06:35Hi, I'm Maya.
06:36I'm the head of post-production for the channel,
06:39and I don't usually get out of my little cubbyhole in front of my computer.
06:44Joke's on me because apparently it's about to rain,
06:46so let's hope this pizza's good.
06:47Today, I'm going to be trying the Classic Cheese on Original Crust.
06:50All right, cheers.
06:51I say this lovingly, but this reminds me of your cafeteria school pizza
06:56from a nostalgic point of view.
06:58It's pretty doughy.
06:59It's also very bready, in my opinion.
07:01There's not as much of a proportionate ratio of cheese, sauce, and dough.
07:07It's just not the pizza that I really would gravitate towards.
07:09I'll also be trying the Classic Combo on Original Crust,
07:12which features pepperoni, beef, sausage, onions, black olives, mushrooms,
07:16and mozzarella cheese.
07:18This is better than the Classic Cheese Pizza,
07:20but only because there actually has more toppings to it.
07:23There is no difference in terms of crust or how the actual bread is cooked or baked.
07:28There are people who really like this type of pizza
07:31who would enjoy more of a bready type of bite.
07:33To me, it's more of a C tier pizza.
07:35I'm sorry, I feel bad.
07:36All right, we're at Papa Murphy's.
07:38When I came out with the pizza, my first thought was,
07:39wait a minute, this sh** isn't baked.
07:41It's a take-and-bake restaurant.
07:42I'd never heard of this before.
07:43I didn't even know this was a thing, but it's done $750 million.
07:46I guess we don't get to eat it now.
07:48We have to take it all the way home.
07:49This is a crazy concept.
07:50They literally didn't do any of the work.
07:51They're just like, here you go, f**k yourself.
07:53There are baking instructions on this.
07:55It's just a huge paper plate.
07:57This can go in the oven?
07:58Leave the pizza on this tray.
08:00That's concerning.
08:0012 to 18 minutes, and we'll see you in a second.
08:02This better be f**king good.
08:04This is DiGiorno's quality.
08:06This isn't DiGiorno.
08:08This is The Struggle.
08:09Try the other one.
08:10Maybe this will redeem it for me.
08:12The toppings taste good because it's bacon and ranch.
08:14Of course it's going to be good,
08:15but that's the only thing it has going for it.
08:17Dough sucks.
08:18This is the freshest dough we've had.
08:19We've proofed it here, and then we baked it fresh.
08:22That should be the greatest dough that we've had all day.
08:23And it is by far the very worst dough I've had.
08:26It's under seasoned.
08:27It's got that like frozen DiGiorno's flavor.
08:30Like it just doesn't taste like fresh, good quality bread.
08:32It tastes like plastic-y, and I taste no yeast in it.
08:35I will say I like the crunch on the outside.
08:37That's kind of fun.
08:38Chickens, whatever.
08:39Ranch is okay.
08:40I had high hopes for this,
08:41and I really wasn't expecting to dislike it
08:43as much as I do,
08:44but I would describe the flavor as almost Hot Pocket-like,
08:47which I guess if you like that, that's great.
08:49But this is a competition of who makes the best pizza,
08:51not who makes the sh**iest Hot Pocket.
08:52It's a snap in my book.
08:53This is horrible.
08:54It's an F.
08:55That's an F.
08:56I will never do this again.
08:57We're at Cici's Pizza.
08:58Chi-Chi.
08:59Yeah, he's been calling it Chi-Chi's Pizza.
09:01Chi-Chi's.
09:03This is clearly a frozen crust.
09:05It's very stiff, but not in a good way.
09:07Cheers.
09:08It's not as bland as some that we've had.
09:10Texturally, it's a f*****g nightmare.
09:11It's so soft, no crispness,
09:14but it is garlicky, which I like.
09:15Yeah, this is called a zesty pepperoni.
09:17Instead of marinara, it's gonna be ranch.
09:20I don't taste the ranch at all.
09:21It's also supposed to be brushed with butter and Parmesan.
09:23I'm not getting any of that.
09:24It makes sense that they have an all-you-can-eat buffet,
09:26because it's the only way that they can get rid of the food.
09:28No one actually wants to buy it,
09:30so as long as you can just keep eating it
09:31for a small price,
09:32at least they'll get rid of their ingredients.
09:34Look at the box.
09:35What does it say here?
09:35The best pizza value anywhere.
09:38Tell that to Costco.
09:39They know their product is so s*****
09:40that they won't even say the best pizza.
09:42They just say the best pizza value.
09:43We'll give this to you,
09:44the cheapest motherf*****g you'll get.
09:46This is a solid D for me.
09:47Not an F, but a D.
09:49It's edging the F, though.
09:52So we're at Sbarro, the original New York pizza.
09:55I think a lot of people would be really unhappy
09:56about that statement, because that's not what this is.
09:59This is not New York pizza, but second off,
10:01they filed for bankruptcy.
10:02Thankfully, they're on a positive upswing today.
10:05It had a gas station next to a jail,
10:07but I'm not judging Sbarro by that.
10:08I don't judge a book by its cover.
10:10I judge it by its taste.
10:12It starts off with a funk,
10:14like almost like someone chewed it and spit in your mouth.
10:16Like a throw-up, almost.
10:16Why did you say that to me?
10:18That's just my opinion.
10:19That's just bad.
10:20It's got chew, but it's not a good chew.
10:22It's like a rubber band chew,
10:23and there was no salt present, period.
10:25The Supreme version, I guess?
10:27You know, this is like bringing down the energy.
10:29You know what's worse than no flavor?
10:31That's what this has.
10:32At least you could fix no flavor.
10:33I don't think you can fix this.
10:35Honestly, I think it's an F.
10:36It's an F, but we're not finished.
10:37We still have a few to go,
10:38including two of the biggest in the country.
10:40Moving on.
10:41All right, Pizza Hut, listen.
10:42They say no one can out-pizza the Hut,
10:44but in my opinion, everyone is out-pizza the Hut,
10:46including me.
10:47Remember that time you commented on my post
10:48and you said, we have your location, Joshua?
10:50Well, you never pulled up
10:51because you're a bunch of cheese pizza from Pizza Hut.
10:55You know, if I was doing $5.5 billion in revenue
10:58just selling pizza,
10:59I also wouldn't give a shit about my product,
11:01because that is not good.
11:02I usually chew my food,
11:03and that was like three bites and it just disappeared.
11:04It's got a crunch, but the inside is just no chew.
11:07Now we're onto their most popular pizza,
11:09the stuffed crust pepperoni.
11:11You know, funny enough, this is better,
11:13only because it's got so much cheese.
11:15It tastes exactly how it did back then,
11:16so they're consistent.
11:17Pizza should have like a chewy, stretchy,
11:20nice toothsome texture to it with some crispiness on it.
11:23This has very little crispiness,
11:24very bready, like Wonder Bread, almost cake-like.
11:27And the crust is pretty bland.
11:28I know I'm talking a little bit of mess here,
11:29but neither of these pizzas taste bad.
11:31They're just not pizza.
11:32And this is on the lower end of what a pizza should be.
11:35Sure, it tastes good.
11:36Of course I could eat this pizza,
11:37especially if I was intoxicated.
11:38The pepperonis are good.
11:40Yeah, I was gonna say,
11:41I think the best thing about this one is the pepperonis.
11:42Pepperonis are good.
11:43I mean, that's it.
11:44This is the exact kind of pizza
11:45that Italians look at America and laugh at us for.
11:48I'm just gonna rate it.
11:49It's a C tier.
11:50It's below mid, so I'm gonna give this one a D.
11:52Oh, I forgot there's D tier.
11:54I meant to say D.
11:55Ultimately, this boils down to a D tier.
11:57Moving on.
11:58We're at Chuck E. Cheese,
11:59and I am shocked.
12:00This is right underneath sales of Blaze Pizza,
12:04and as a delivery service,
12:06over $300 million in sales.
12:08It's crazy.
12:09Who wakes up and goes,
12:10oh, you know what?
12:10I'm craving pizza.
12:11Who wants an order of Chuck E. Cheese?
12:12I'm afraid to eat this
12:13because it's coming from the general vicinity
12:15of a bunch of children that are touching all these knobs,
12:17and I just feel like the people that work there
12:19are touching all the stuff that the kids are touching.
12:21We're gonna eat it anyway.
12:22If I get a stomach virus from this,
12:23I'm gonna be really pissed off.
12:24It's gonna taste like ball pit.
12:27This tastes like almost nothing.
12:30This is the closest to cardboard I've ever eaten.
12:31The sauce is there texturally,
12:33but the flavor isn't.
12:34The cheese is there texturally,
12:36but the flavor is barely there,
12:37and the dough tastes like nothing.
12:38Normally, we'd expect a sweet sauce
12:40or something like that,
12:41especially since there's kids,
12:42except the sauce is sort of just not there.
12:45It might be just tomato paste.
12:46Honestly, I think tomato paste
12:47would be more flavorful than this.
12:49This is probably gonna taste better.
12:50This is the five meat
12:51because it has five meats on it
12:52to help carry what is not there.
12:55Would you look at that?
12:56It tastes like bacon, ham, and pepperoni,
12:57which tastes good,
12:58but the pizza itself does not.
13:00After like the fifth chew,
13:01it all disappears.
13:02Yeah.
13:03Out of all the pizzas that we've had today,
13:04I'm gonna give this one a solid fat F.
13:06It's an F.
13:06I mean, it's Chuck E. Cheese.
13:07Moving on.
13:08All right, we're at Mod Pizza,
13:09basically the Chipotle of pizza in a way, right?
13:11This is one of the better looking mods,
13:13but I got one issue.
13:14We ordered this in a timely manner,
13:16and it is ice cold.
13:19At least it's not sweet.
13:20I appreciate that.
13:21I don't like the crust at all.
13:23If you took a thicker tortilla
13:24and put it in their pizza,
13:25everyone cheese and sauce,
13:26it would be the same thing.
13:27It's good.
13:28It's not great.
13:29I do like Blaze's crust better.
13:30The Mad Dog.
13:32I kind of like this one.
13:33Flavor on this is really nice.
13:34I will say.
13:40So sauce, still lackluster.
13:41Crust, I don't like it,
13:42but the flavor of the topping is wonderful.
13:44I kind of like the crust.
13:45You like the crust?
13:46Not like a flatbread,
13:47but almost there's just a crisp to it
13:48versus like a chew.
13:49Blaze is better,
13:50but I'm starting to like this better than Blaze
13:51the more I eat it.
13:52This one's beating the cheese one for sure.
13:54I like the flavor of meat on there.
13:55What do you think?
13:56Yeah.
13:58Like if this was more of like
13:58an ideal Neapolitan style crust,
14:00I'd be happier with it personally.
14:01Less tortilla-like.
14:02I don't like how thin it is.
14:03It's not bad.
14:04The flavor's pretty good.
14:05I'll give it a B tier.
14:06Overall, this is a pretty B experience.
14:08Not bad Mod Pizza.
14:09B tier.
14:10Moving on.
14:11We are at the highest grossing pizza place in the world?
14:15America.
14:16In America?
14:17$9 billion in sales annually.
14:20What could it possibly be?
14:21It's a five by five deal.
14:22They still have that?
14:23I don't think they do,
14:24but it is Domino's.
14:25This is probably the most anticipated place
14:27right next to Pizza Hut,
14:29but Pizza Hut was a total flop.
14:30So hopefully Domino's pulls through.
14:32Cheers.
14:33There's no crust in the world
14:35that could save that atrocious sauce.
14:36That is rough.
14:37Crust by itself, not bad.
14:38It's kind of garlic bread.
14:40I like that.
14:40No pizza purist on planet Earth
14:42would verify this crust to be good.
14:44It's like very, very, very mid,
14:46almost below mid,
14:47but the flavor of it's nice.
14:48I do like that garlic bread flavor.
14:50The cheese is almost,
14:51you can't even notice it.
14:52There's a little bit of like a fake parm flavor,
14:53which I guess is kind of nice.
14:54It's really on the crust.
14:55This is their New York slice.
14:57Their most popular.
14:58Cheers.
15:00Extra of the crust is good.
15:00The crust is way better.
15:02The sauce is not.
15:03Has that chewy you're talking about,
15:04but not too chewy.
15:05It disintegrates a little too early.
15:06Well, look at that.
15:07It's like a cracker.
15:08But it is thin.
15:09This New York style surprised me.
15:09I didn't think it was going to be that different.
15:10I thought they were just going to be like,
15:11oh, we put some pepper on it.
15:12F*** you.
15:13If I was in New York tasting this,
15:14like we did in our New York pizza video,
15:16where we found the best New York pizza,
15:17it'd be below mid,
15:18but it wouldn't be at the bottom of the list.
15:20The sauce killed this pizza though.
15:21So honestly, all things considered,
15:23if you like ketchup on your pizza,
15:24you'll like this pizza.
15:25But if you don't,
15:26it's a solid C tier.
15:27It's better than Papa John's,
15:28but it's a C.
15:29It's not high enough to go to the B territory,
15:31just because of what we have rated B.
15:32So this is going to have to fall into the C category.
15:34All right.
15:35The big three are all done.
15:36And we haven't even cracked an A tier yet,
15:38which brings me to Marco's pizza.
15:39Could this be our lone A tier?
15:41I have never even heard of this place.
15:43And I'm going to be honest.
15:44On the outside,
15:45it looks old,
15:46but I think I might be wrong
15:47because this pizza looks like one of the best ones
15:49we've had just visually.
15:50All right.
15:52Oh, yes, please.
15:55Wow, dude.
15:56I really like that ratio.
15:56It's a good crust to cheese to sauce ratio.
15:59The cheese is beautifully browned and burnished.
16:01No one gets it that dark on the cheese.
16:03Yeah.
16:04They care.
16:05The pepperonis are crisp.
16:05Two kinds of pepperoni.
16:06I'm kind of hype about this pizza.
16:07You want me to feed this to you?
16:08Mm-mm-mm.
16:09Damn it.
16:10Two types of pepperoni is where it's at.
16:11You've got the slightly chewy flat pepperoni,
16:13and then the crispy cup pepperoni.
16:15You need that.
16:16Try that crust.
16:17She's light.
16:18You're still crisp.
16:19You see what I mean though?
16:19This is like the type of chew I prefer.
16:21This is like there's resistance,
16:22but it melts like a nice steak.
16:23Crisp bottom.
16:24The dough feels good.
16:25It's got a little bit of a QSR flavor.
16:26Like it does still taste kind of like commercialized pizza,
16:29but the sauce isn't overly sweet.
16:30It's seasoned nicely.
16:31It's not like got tons of oregano in there.
16:33It's nice and balanced.
16:34The cheese flavor is nice.
16:35The cheese texture is nice.
16:36The pepperonis taste perfect.
16:38Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
16:42Papa John's wishes that they could do this.
16:44I've never had a QSR pizza that hit me like this sober.
16:47It's an S-tier pizza.
16:48Let's fucking go.
16:49That is an S-tier pizza.
16:52Unreal.
16:53That means that Marcos is the one and only S-tier QSR
16:57fast food pizza that we had ever had.
16:59We tried every single one that exists in America
17:01and Marcos somehow stood on top.
17:02I judged a book by its cover.
17:03I was wrong.
17:04I looked at the outside.
17:05I saw the branding and I said,
17:06this place is stuck in 1972.
17:07There's no fucking way this is a good pizza.
17:09Turns out Marcos won.
17:10The moral of the story is,
17:12although there was a winner today,
17:13I would like to ask you to go and support
17:15your local pizza places,
17:17anywhere that's near you.
17:18Ideally, maybe a smaller family owned
17:20mom and pop type shop.
17:21They're probably making, number one, better pizza.
17:23Number two, you're supporting a local business.
17:25And number three, it's good for the local economy.
17:27All right?
17:28Support those around you.
17:28Maybe avoid the big dogs.
17:30They're doing just fine.
17:31God damn, how many jobs does bro have?
17:35Side hustle.
17:37Oh, they didn't let me touch the rat.
17:39I wanted to touch the rat and they said,
17:41don't touch that.
17:42So I hit him.