Married at First Sight UK Season 9 Episode 25
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Previously, Ross's defense of wife Sasha triggered conflict with Alex, while careless comments
00:00:19from Casper, and did recent progress in his marriage to Emma.
00:00:30And a surprise return led to a less than happy reunion for Holly and Alex.
00:00:51Tonight, while some couples have cause to celebrate,
00:00:56raw emotional honesty,
00:01:05sparks anguish for others,
00:01:14and a lingering feud,
00:01:22plus a clash with wife Holly,
00:01:26puts Alex in the eye of the storm.
00:01:51It's the morning after the dinner party.
00:01:56It's nice when you're not involved and it doesn't involve you, isn't it?
00:02:09I feel like we're going into the commitment ceremony after the best week we've had.
00:02:13Like, normally I go in there a little bit worried.
00:02:15I thought I've actually got good news for once.
00:02:17You're doing well.
00:02:18Proud of you.
00:02:21I'm happy that we're good.
00:02:22I actually am.
00:02:24Positive vibes only, mate.
00:02:26Do you want a glass of water or anything?
00:02:33Oh, yeah, I'll have some water, please.
00:02:35This week, me and Christine actually have had a lot of fun.
00:02:39There's been some tears, some laughter.
00:02:42Obviously, it's come towards the back end of the experiment now,
00:02:44where things are starting to get really serious.
00:02:48Thanks.
00:02:49You're welcome.
00:02:51I'm looking at, can I be with this girl for the rest of my life?
00:02:56Because, ultimately, that's why we're in here.
00:03:00How cute!
00:03:01For Christina and Kieran, the initial intimate connection was strong.
00:03:10So grateful I've been matched with you, honestly.
00:03:16But what started as a small setback...
00:03:19I'm quite disappointed that my call hasn't gone yet.
00:03:22It's well frustrating.
00:03:24We literally haven't been able to kiss or be intimate...
00:03:28Since the honeymoon.
00:03:28...since the honeymoon.
00:03:31...turned out to be a bigger problem.
00:03:33Would you say you've been holding back on the physical affection
00:03:37just because of the cold sore?
00:03:39I can't blame it all on the cold sore.
00:03:40I can't.
00:03:42I'm really questioning, at the minute,
00:03:43if I'm able to sustain a relationship with someone that suffers with PMDD.
00:03:49Well, it's f****** shit.
00:03:54Ultimately, there's things there that I'm struggling with.
00:03:58I find it difficult to be intimate with Christina
00:04:00because I don't know where my headspace is at.
00:04:06Also, me and Christina had a conversation about life
00:04:10and what I want out of life and what she wants out of life
00:04:12and I just feel like we're on different pages.
00:04:16She is an incredible, incredible girl.
00:04:20But there's differences there that are quite important to me.
00:04:24I'll be speaking to the experts today
00:04:27and I'll just be telling them my side of how I'm feeling.
00:04:30It's not easy, but I've got to be open and honest with Christina.
00:04:42Oh, big commitment ceremony.
00:04:46Yeah.
00:04:47Yeah.
00:04:50I think that the whole group can see some positives and some hope for us.
00:04:58We'll see what the experts have to say.
00:05:02I've got a lot of clarification this week about my relationship.
00:05:06Emma's not been emotionally vulnerable with me.
00:05:08It's something I've been asking for,
00:05:09saying I need this from someone who I'm going to fall in love with.
00:05:13I think the comment that Emma made that she doesn't like me enough
00:05:16to be emotionally vulnerable,
00:05:19it's taken time to settle in, but, you know, it does hurt.
00:05:24How do you feel about feeling more vulnerable around me?
00:05:29At this point in time, I don't think I like you enough to be able to do that.
00:05:39Yeah, I want to make this work, but I can't see the wood from the trees.
00:05:47Kasper and I have had a tough week. It's been a rocky week.
00:05:54We didn't have a great dinner party.
00:05:56We had a little argument last night,
00:05:58and we're in a place where we just circle around.
00:06:02We both think we're right.
00:06:04I've worked hard at this, and the last week,
00:06:08it feels like the trying hasn't been reciprocated.
00:06:12Intimacy hasn't improved in the relationship.
00:06:15But I'm not completely ready to pack my bags and just give up.
00:06:22Yeah, big commitment ceremony.
00:06:26How are you feeling?
00:06:28Deflated.
00:06:30Yeah?
00:06:31Obviously, we've got to see Alex again today.
00:06:36We stayed together, and it made us stronger still.
00:06:39It's completely in room.
00:06:41I really appreciated you, like, having my back, though, yesterday.
00:06:44Babe, always.
00:06:46My dad would have been a very happy man.
00:06:48Do you reckon?
00:06:49Yeah.
00:06:50I'm always happy, but no matter what,
00:06:52I'm hearing nobody speak to my wife like that.
00:06:55Nobody.
00:07:04This morning, I woke up, and I'm just physically drained.
00:07:07After the dinner party, I thought it was best that I went back to a hotel.
00:07:12I'm so very confused about how I feel about Alex right now.
00:07:21I was surprised that Holly showed up yesterday.
00:07:24We had a little conversation.
00:07:25It didn't go how I wanted it to go.
00:07:28I didn't know you was missing your kids.
00:07:30You haven't communicated that to me.
00:07:32I don't have kids of my own, and people come and go.
00:07:35I don't have kids of my own, and people can only meet you from where they are.
00:07:40This is my chance with Holly to sit down and air out any issues that we have.
00:07:48Last night, I wanted to see some change from him,
00:07:51and I didn't see any change at all.
00:07:54He should have clocked on that I was missing my kids,
00:07:56and clearly he hasn't.
00:07:59I don't know how this is going to turn out today.
00:08:04So
00:08:29hello and welcome to your penultimate commitment ceremony.
00:08:33This is one of just two final opportunities for you to open up to us
00:08:38and really share your thoughts and feelings about your marriages.
00:08:43So I want to encourage you to be as honest and vulnerable as you can
00:08:48and really make the most of us while you still have the opportunity.
00:08:55First up to the couch,
00:09:00Russ and Sasha.
00:09:02Hello.
00:09:10Turbulent week, right?
00:09:11It's the longest week of my life.
00:09:13It feels like a month.
00:09:15Ross?
00:09:16A tough week.
00:09:17So let's unpack it slowly, okay?
00:09:19Let's talk about the dinner party.
00:09:22Ross, you immediately took Alex to the side.
00:09:27I told him my feelings from bottom of my heart, and it's Italian.
00:09:32It wasn't nice what it said to my wife.
00:09:37Yeah, I was angry.
00:09:38I'm still angry.
00:09:39Okay, you're still angry.
00:09:40All right.
00:09:42All of that and the stump of being just, they stole it,
00:09:45and it could have been smeared then, but no, they just took it further.
00:09:48Could have gone back to square one, you know?
00:09:51Would you like to go to square one?
00:09:54I can fuck off.
00:09:58Honestly?
00:09:58I think it's past that.
00:09:59Start there.
00:10:00Took it too far.
00:10:02Okay, all right.
00:10:02Fair enough.
00:10:03You actually are so embarrassing.
00:10:08Alex, why do you believe you chose not to apologize?
00:10:14If Ross had came over to me yesterday and been calm, then we would have spoken.
00:10:19You know why I said that, though?
00:10:20You know why I said I got angry?
00:10:22Let me just speak to Paul one sec.
00:10:23Let me speak to Paul one sec.
00:10:24When Ross took me to the side yesterday, I was thinking, this is my guy, we're going to talk.
00:10:30He's going to tell me why he thinks I've done wrong.
00:10:34What I said at the spa, I probably shouldn't have said.
00:10:38But I felt like I was being attacked, and I just attacked back.
00:10:46Regardless of anything, I'm sorry for what I said to Sasha.
00:10:49Whether she accepts it or not, that's another story.
00:10:54So now Sasha, he's apologizing...
00:11:00...about what he said to you at the spa.
00:11:08Do you accept the apology?
00:11:11I do.
00:11:12I do.
00:11:12I do.
00:11:13I do.
00:11:13I do.
00:11:14I do.
00:11:14I do.
00:11:15I do.
00:11:15I do.
00:11:16I do.
00:11:16I do.
00:11:17I do.
00:11:17I do.
00:11:18I do.
00:11:32So now Sasha, he's apologizing...
00:11:38Do you accept the apology?
00:11:39I do.
00:11:45In any normal situation, I think apologizing takes a lot.
00:11:51But I'm not going to tolerate what I've witnessed throughout these few weeks...
00:11:55...towards the women, towards me that day, and let him come off like the good guy.
00:12:03I do.
00:12:06Okay, that's fair. That's your prerogative, okay, to not accept it, okay?
00:12:11It's clear this is not going to get resolved today.
00:12:14But there were things that both of you could have done better in that interaction.
00:12:20We are mature people.
00:12:22There's no room for fighting here.
00:12:28The key, cooler heads always prevail.
00:12:30Always prevail.
00:12:33It's like your face out, it's knocking me sick.
00:12:48I can't sit next to him.
00:12:52Are you guys okay to keep going?
00:12:55I can't physically sit next to him.
00:13:03Okay, Ross, Sasha, let's move to another topic.
00:13:16If we can, let's go back to last week.
00:13:20We had an argument about a certain text that Alex had sent.
00:13:27It was me explaining that the text wasn't in good nature.
00:13:31I think we had a little bit of a miscommunication, and that turned into an argument.
00:13:38And then he starts packing his case and saying he's had enough.
00:13:45I let you out.
00:13:47She's trying to stop me, but I completely let you out.
00:13:52And I did throw the ring on the floor, yeah.
00:13:55I regret what I did.
00:13:56I was disappointed in myself, and it wasn't right.
00:14:04So, Sasha, what impact did that have on you?
00:14:10I was upset, and I was like, this is going to take a lot for me to ever get that picture
00:14:16at my head of you throwing your wedding ring.
00:14:20For me to feel like I'm not worthy of you.
00:14:22For me to feel secure, moving to Manchester and leaving everything behind in Birmingham,
00:14:32thinking you can just like, I'm leaving, that's just too unstable for me.
00:14:39Would you say that was the first time that you questioned your future with Ross?
00:14:47Yeah, 100%.
00:14:48Wow.
00:15:03So does this make you think of what could happen down the line?
00:15:18But it sounds like, or at least it looks like, you both resolved this.
00:15:36Yeah, we did.
00:15:36All right.
00:15:37How did you make up?
00:15:38He like, wrote me a lovely note about how he feels because Ross finds it easy to communicate
00:15:43through writing sometimes than verbally.
00:15:46And he bought me some gifts, so.
00:15:49You're winning.
00:15:50I like this.
00:15:51I like this.
00:15:52OK.
00:15:53Yeah, I put my hand up, held down on me.
00:15:55Yeah.
00:15:56Well, I'll tell you what, I applaud you putting your hand up.
00:15:59That self-awareness is mature.
00:16:02That's very mature.
00:16:05So there was an apology, which is great.
00:16:07Yeah.
00:16:07And what we find happens when couples have these disagreements,
00:16:12if they're able to figure out how to come back together, they're normally stronger.
00:16:16We'll get there, you know, we're strong.
00:16:19Yeah, I've got nothing to worry about.
00:16:21OK.
00:16:21This entire process is about learning.
00:16:24It's about learning so that you can individually be better,
00:16:27so that you can be better for each other.
00:16:31Let's go to the decision, Ross.
00:16:37Wow.
00:16:38It's been a tough week.
00:16:39But I'm actually glad it's been tough, because it's made us more stronger.
00:16:46I still want you in the fuller world.
00:16:47And let's see what next week brings.
00:16:51Stay.
00:16:52All right.
00:16:56Good one.
00:16:57I think this was one of our worst weeks yet.
00:17:04But it was an important week for us
00:17:07because when we come to these problems on the outside,
00:17:11we'll know how to manage them better.
00:17:14So I wrote stay.
00:17:18Nice.
00:17:19Nice.
00:17:20I love what you just said, Sasha.
00:17:21We are learning so that we can become stronger outside the experiment.
00:17:25All right.
00:17:26So continue to learn this week.
00:17:27Thank you so much.
00:17:38OK.
00:17:38So next up, we have Polly and Adam.
00:17:50Hey, guys.
00:17:50Good to see the two of you.
00:17:53How's your week been?
00:17:54It's been a really good week for us.
00:17:58Tell me how the love and hate task went for you.
00:18:00Adam thinks I'm opinionated.
00:18:03I bought.
00:18:05Yeah, there is.
00:18:05I actually really struggled.
00:18:07There was only the opinionated thing was something I actually disliked.
00:18:11So it's not like I hate it.
00:18:12That's just if I had to pick something, you know what I mean?
00:18:14So it was quite a hard thing for you to do.
00:18:17Really hard.
00:18:17Yeah.
00:18:18Obviously, when I find it.
00:18:18It wasn't for me.
00:18:21OK.
00:18:21And Polly, what was something that you really struggled with?
00:18:24I think it was the love and hate thing.
00:18:25I think it was the love and hate thing.
00:18:28OK.
00:18:29And Polly, what were some of the things that you didn't like about Adam?
00:18:34He doesn't tell me I'm beautiful.
00:18:37And he's not romantic.
00:18:41I don't normally do romantic things.
00:18:43Because of that, I want to show Polly what I think is romantic.
00:18:48So I told her to nip out for an hour.
00:18:51And she came back.
00:18:52And there was like a candle walkway.
00:18:54With rose petals.
00:18:56Rose petals on the floor leading into the kitchen.
00:18:59There was a little teddy bear made out of roses.
00:19:01Petals on the table.
00:19:03Love heart.
00:19:04Candles everywhere.
00:19:06I cooked my famous chicken chorizo spicy pasta.
00:19:10And Polly said it was the most romantic thing she's ever received.
00:19:13So.
00:19:14It's done well.
00:19:15Romantic.
00:19:16Tick.
00:19:19I feel like we're now in love with you, Adam.
00:19:26I think what's really nice, though.
00:19:27It's so fabulous just to see that you're trying to make a difference here.
00:19:33Yeah.
00:19:33Polly, how did it feel to experience all that romance from Adam?
00:19:38Really nice.
00:19:39Really nice.
00:19:40I said it's the first time that I've had, like, butterflies.
00:19:44So I was like, oh, I actually feel like I really like you now.
00:19:48It was really nice.
00:19:50So if you can keep it up, then we're rolling.
00:19:56From an intimacy point of view,
00:19:58would you say that that is also going in a really healthy direction?
00:20:03Yeah.
00:20:04I mean, it could be more, but it's there.
00:20:07I would just like more.
00:20:08I always want more.
00:20:09Oh, OK.
00:20:11Don't feel like I should keep constantly having to say that's what I want.
00:20:14And it just gets a bit frustrating.
00:20:19I know it's something that I need to work on.
00:20:21It does make me feel very uncomfortable talking about it.
00:20:24What we're really seeing here is that the two of you
00:20:27have worked so hard over the last few weeks to get to this point.
00:20:31I would say that a few conversations are required around intimacy.
00:20:35There's a bit of a question mark there in terms of who initiates
00:20:39and, you know, feeling desired and things like that.
00:20:41And of course, if you need me to help you, do let me know.
00:20:46OK.
00:20:47Let's go to the decisions.
00:20:49Polly, if we can start with you.
00:20:54I feel like we have definitely understood each other
00:20:58a lot more than kind of we already have.
00:21:00He's definitely no longer at a snail's pace
00:21:03and a bit more of a tortoise's pace, which I can deal with
00:21:06because slow progress, again, is better than no progress.
00:21:11Forever grateful for him.
00:21:12Stay.
00:21:17Thank you, Polly.
00:21:19Adam?
00:21:20I think the week we've had's been our best week by far.
00:21:24And we're going from strength to strength.
00:21:27And maybe you can show me how romantic you can be now.
00:21:31So for that reason, I put stay.
00:21:38Well, thank you, Polly and Adam.
00:21:39Have a fabulous week.
00:21:41Thank you so much.
00:21:49And next up...
00:21:51...we have Emma and Kasper.
00:21:57Come on down, you two.
00:22:00So, the two of you, I know you've had a tricky week.
00:22:08It's been a long week.
00:22:11The start of this week, we were in a far better place
00:22:13than we are probably now.
00:22:15It's got more fractures.
00:22:17Fair?
00:22:18There's a lot of good things about our relationship.
00:22:21But for me, Charlene came, and there was a comment made.
00:22:28This one hurt me.
00:22:32I was explaining emotional vulnerability to Emma.
00:22:39She snapped at me with, I just don't like you enough.
00:22:44I think it's a good thing that we've had a good week.
00:22:47I said, I don't know whether I can be emotionally vulnerable with you.
00:22:51You said, you don't like me enough.
00:22:52I don't know whether I like you enough to be emotionally vulnerable.
00:22:55There's, the like there is the key to the comment.
00:22:59You know, we spent five weeks together.
00:23:00I'm not a bad person, but...
00:23:03I mean, in the relationship.
00:23:04Don't get me wrong.
00:23:05Well, that's not what you said.
00:23:11I mean, I've been talking about my need for emotional vulnerability.
00:23:15And to hear, it's not coming because I don't like you enough.
00:23:18I was, but for me, it was just like, okay, you know,
00:23:21what are we working with here in any way, shape, or form?
00:23:23Yes, because I jumped in there.
00:23:26In response to Emma's quite harsh comment, did that hurt your feelings?
00:23:32Hurt my feelings, yeah.
00:23:37Was that the first thing that Emma had said that made you feel that way?
00:23:45Yes, in terms of like, I felt I didn't deserve that comment.
00:23:52I want to turn the tables for a moment.
00:23:54So Emma, from your position, have there been things along the way
00:23:58that Casper has said that have hurt your feelings?
00:24:03Yeah, definitely.
00:24:06I asked you if you'd like to practice the tasks that Charlene had given us.
00:24:11You said to me, yes, I want to practice the tasks.
00:24:15You know, I want to build intimacy with future people.
00:24:20I mean, I felt like I'm a testing station.
00:24:26And that's what I thought in that comment.
00:24:29And then, turning at me and laughing.
00:24:36Oh, I didn't turn at you, love.
00:24:38You were laughing.
00:24:39Like, that's not a funny joke.
00:24:44Casper, how do you think Emma felt when you said that?
00:24:47In the nicest possible way, I wanted to leave last week.
00:24:53I absolutely wanted to leave, yeah.
00:24:56And with Emma saying that comment with Charlene, yeah, I just went, why did I do it?
00:25:01If that was exactly what you felt with me, why did I stay?
00:25:05I've put a lot of effort into this.
00:25:07So you mean me to Emma this week?
00:25:11At the end of this week, after she made that comment.
00:25:16You know what?
00:25:17If that's what she thinks of me,
00:25:22why am I here?
00:25:26So you're sitting here trying to say that it's me pulling away.
00:25:28You pulled away as well.
00:25:30Yeah, yeah, I have.
00:25:31There wasn't...
00:25:33We go round in circles, and I don't want to blurt out every tiny little thing
00:25:37that we've done that's pissed each other off this week, because there's a lot.
00:25:41Yeah.
00:25:42I feel like we're nitpicking at things that went wrong this week,
00:25:45but I know this anger is temporary.
00:25:54We don't want to hurt each other.
00:25:55We don't want to hurt each other.
00:25:57But I'm not as positive as Emma.
00:26:00Yeah, I'm trying to work on it.
00:26:03But I don't have that natural, things are going to be OK.
00:26:08I've got a lot of respect for Emma.
00:26:12I think more than anything else, where I'm at right now is,
00:26:15it's a frustration born out of the fact that we wanted what these guys have.
00:26:20I think it's a frustration born out of the fact that we wanted what these guys have.
00:26:22I think it's a frustration born out of the fact that we wanted what these guys have.
00:26:27I think it's a frustration born out of the fact that we wanted what these guys have.
00:26:29Both of us wanted that.
00:26:32And...
00:26:33You feel sad?
00:26:34We feel sad.
00:26:34We feel sad because we came here for love.
00:26:40Emma's fantastic in a lot of ways, but there are things that I need.
00:26:45What do you need?
00:26:47I need someone who is as emotionally vulnerable and open as I am.
00:26:52I need someone to need me more than Emma would ever need me.
00:27:00She's a very strong, independent woman.
00:27:03Emma, can you give Kasper what he needs?
00:27:14Oh, I'm going to cry.
00:27:22I need to be more emotionally vulnerable.
00:27:26I...
00:27:30I can be in the right situations.
00:27:32I can.
00:27:36But I need to be loved in order to love.
00:27:48OK.
00:27:52Let's go to the decision.
00:27:58Kasper, let's start with you.
00:28:04Both Emma and I applied for this because we both wanted to find the one.
00:28:11I think...
00:28:14Emma is a lovely person.
00:28:16But for me, what I've found is, you know, me and Emma think about the world and everything
00:28:21and how we live our lives in such different ways.
00:28:26I've not been perfect during the experiment, but I don't feel a romantic spark.
00:28:34After all of that, a rocky week where a lot of clarification happened.
00:28:39After all of that, a rocky week where a lot of clarification happened.
00:28:50I wrote...
00:28:51Leave.
00:29:00Well, Emma...
00:29:08I've done a lot of reflection over the last 24 hours it
00:29:14I've thrown everything into our relationship
00:29:24So I feel like
00:29:39It's that it's the right time definitely
00:29:46I really
00:29:56I do think that every man and woman deserves to be treated like a king or queen in their
00:30:01Relationships and we just can't give that to each other, but we deserve it. We'll get it you do you both do
00:30:08And I did put all of our efforts into this
00:30:12Like you put so much into this. Thank you
00:30:17We did we didn't come in here and then go it's not gonna work and walk away like we we pushed and pushed at it
00:30:24But we just struggled to find that middle ground. I think between us to really make it work
00:30:28I
00:30:32Thank you both so much for bringing your whole hearts and souls to this experience, it's been our pleasure
00:30:40Thank you
00:30:51It's really sad that this not worked out
00:30:52I mean I came in to find love because it's the thing that's missing in my life
00:30:57And unfortunately, I haven't found that with Emma
00:31:01It's the right decision I'm ready to go home gives a kiss for the road
00:31:05And I really hope I can just meet that person who's gonna make me happy and I'm gonna make them happy
00:31:10Of course I wanted to come here walk down the aisle and walk out hand-in-hand for the husband
00:31:19It's such a real shame that I didn't get someone to to adore me and me adore them
00:31:29I
00:31:31Don't know what to say. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to say
00:31:36I don't know what to say
00:31:39But you know, he's out there
00:31:58Next up on the couch could we have
00:32:04Amy and Luke
00:32:09Let's go
00:32:11Big smiles
00:32:13Very big smiles. Yeah, how's the week? It was really good
00:32:16We had a love-hate week and we divulged and two things that were really important for us to hear from each other
00:32:21We had a nice pottery day that I organized
00:32:26All right, so your task this week was likes dislike yes, so Amy what were your dislikes of Luke I
00:32:34Feel like he sort of performs in front of the group and when he's with me is like a different person and
00:32:41If you say something make sure you mean it
00:32:44Because if you say something to me and then you change your answer or your comments a few days later
00:32:49I'm gonna be confused like
00:32:51So now what I hear you saying Amy is you want?
00:32:55Luke the same Luke that you see behind closed doors. You want that Luke all the time. Yeah
00:33:04What's something that you believe you you want to work on this week inappropriate comments
00:33:14At the pottery day it did make me feel a little bit uncomfortable
00:33:20What was it that offended you
00:33:22Luke whips his t-shirt off and
00:33:25I'm sat on a stool and he sits on still behind
00:33:29And he was like I want to replace the chair with your face
00:33:33I
00:33:39Was like what the fuck
00:33:46Quite specific you want to sit on my face
00:33:51I'm not an awkward person like in the bedroom or anything like I'd like exploring and what there's just a time and place and
00:33:58It just makes me feel uncomfortable
00:34:01Okay
00:34:04Luke do you feel clear about when would be the right time to say something a bit sexy to Amy?
00:34:10Not particularly clearly yet because sometimes even when we're but together by ourselves and I do tell you things
00:34:16She would look at me and almost like like you call it a kiss in it. You say you get the egg and then
00:34:22It's just the way he delivers it
00:34:25For me to be with Amy and have a cheeky moment like that means a lot to me
00:34:30Even though that's a big part of me. I'm ready to let that go. You don't need to let it go
00:34:35Just turn it down a little bit. Yeah, turn it down a significant amount
00:34:41This is boundaries now boundaries are good, but it's something that you have to manage in order to sustain the relationship
00:34:50Everyone needs boundaries
00:34:54What's been playing on my mind is
00:34:57With like the salsa thing with Lacey and Adam
00:35:01He said to me if that was you on that photo, we'd have to have serious conversations
00:35:08So explain what
00:35:11You meant about the photo. So I received a photo of
00:35:16Lacey and Adam doing a salsa dance together
00:35:19And I
00:35:21Messaged Amy straightaway and I said, I'm really proud that that wasn't you like and this is why you always act with class and integrity
00:35:28And I said, I just want to what was I not acting with class?
00:35:32No, no, I just that's the message I sent to to Amy how's me dancing in
00:35:38About you. I just sending a message. You said class. Yeah, I must have used that word. I said class and integrity. So I'm not
00:35:44That's
00:35:46Not what I said you're putting words in my mouth you saying that I'm just trying to get a point because that that's the message
00:35:51I sent or use your words a bit wisely
00:35:57Fair enough, okay
00:36:04It was just a comment about like you glad it wasn't me because if it was we'd have to have like
00:36:09To be able to trust me because it would have hurt me. Yeah, because that's a me issue though
00:36:14It's not nothing to do with anyone else in the group
00:36:16So where I will commend you is that you're being vulnerable and you're saying this is how I feel
00:36:20Yeah, right. These are these are the emotions. I was just happy that you know, I was just happy that it wasn't it wasn't you
00:36:27Clearly the relationship is strengthening
00:36:30Amy makes it very clear what she wants and what's not acceptable in the relationship
00:36:35But Luke I need you to think about what the boundaries are
00:36:40Let's go to the decision
00:36:43I've enjoyed every second of this experience. I'm so looking forward to do more. I'm enjoying that. We had a really good week
00:36:51On that note I have chosen to stay
00:36:55Right
00:37:00This week has been a week of growth I
00:37:04Do feel that we do still have a lot to work on and a lot to understand about each other
00:37:10but I
00:37:12Have made my decision to stay
00:37:25I'd like to call up to the couch
00:37:34Nathan and Lacey, come on up
00:37:42Welcome
00:37:43How was it this week? Yes, it was good, wasn't it?
00:37:47I've actually bought some flowers. Oh, I've left a little surprise for you on the table run really quick
00:37:55Yeah, the flowers and it made I was when I sleep so happy
00:37:59Knowing that he got flowers all by himself and he wanted to surprise me. Yeah, I was very happy wasn't I?
00:38:04Yeah, I tend to take my own. Thank you so much. I tried I mean
00:38:09Let's move on to spa and a little salsa
00:38:13This was me I was in my element I got a bit into it a bit of freestyle, you know, obviously there was a photo
00:38:20But
00:38:23We have very good trust for each other
00:38:26He can do it I can do it we come home together that we trust boundaries. I mean, I'm not like a control
00:38:32No, so you wouldn't want someone slapping my bomb. So when you saw that photo Nathan you were there was no issue whatsoever
00:38:40No, I
00:38:42Thought like if you know your worth and you both know you're worth of each other
00:38:46Also, I'm very content in I know I've got a good thing there's no problem
00:38:53Is there anything you want to work on this week
00:38:57To know what we're good. All right, so strength to strength is what you've been moving every week, which is great
00:39:04We applaud you on that. Yeah. Yeah, let's go to a decision. I
00:39:10Thought every week we're getting closer. We've got good trust for each other
00:39:16I'm very happy. I'm very grateful. I'm proud of how far you've come as well
00:39:21For that reason I would love to stay
00:39:29So obviously want us to continue learning more things by each other
00:39:33Yeah, probably in the best place that we have been the whole time
00:39:37So for that reason I want to stay
00:39:40One
00:39:43Thing that I do love about both of you is each week. I feel like there is an emotional progression
00:39:48Right, that is beautiful. So continue to be beautiful together. Thank you so much
00:40:06Our next couple on the couch
00:40:10You
00:40:12Kieran and Christina
00:40:19Well, how's your week been
00:40:22Interesting interesting being the hardest week yet
00:40:27What's made it the hardest
00:40:29It's not it's not necessarily anything to do with Christina as a person
00:40:32Like I love how I love a lot of things about Christina and I do when I and I've told you that
00:40:37But you know, I don't really want to be intimate with her
00:40:44I don't want to leave her on because I don't know. I don't really know where me heads up
00:40:51Okay, and I'm just finding it really hard to try and
00:40:57Work it all out I guess
00:41:00This is a scary stage of the experiment guys, you know, this is the second last commitment ceremony
00:41:06You know, you're getting really close to needing to make that big decision about are we going to commit to each other going forward?
00:41:15At the last commitment ceremony and I explained how the PMDD was affecting me
00:41:22But I've since realized that there's underlying
00:41:27Areas where we're not similar but are quite important to me
00:41:30What made you say that
00:41:32I asked you the other day, didn't I? I say is what's more important to you finding a husband
00:41:37or pursuing something that
00:41:39You're really passionate about and she said finding a husband and I went this is why we're very different
00:41:46Coming in here from day one. I wanted to build a new life
00:41:52wherever that took me
00:41:55Which I guess I can feel the pressure of
00:41:57Which I guess I can feel the pressure of
00:42:01For someone to be ready to leave where she's from and almost move straight away, that's scary
00:42:09It's just scary
00:42:14I came into this wanting to find a wife who I can spend the rest of my life with
00:42:21But I'm petrified
00:42:24What specifically are you petrified about?
00:42:40Waste and tame with the wrong person
00:42:54What specifically are you petrified about?
00:43:04Wasting time with the wrong person
00:43:14You know, I've been with people for years and
00:43:17And I've been the one that's brought everything
00:43:19for years and and I've been the one that's brought everything at the table
00:43:23okay and then I've been shit on and if I had a duck like I'm just pet I'm petrified
00:43:31so that's a very real and valid fear for you I'm scared of scared of giving
00:43:39someone me everything for it to not work out because that's what happened before
00:43:43I thought that happened from her life yeah Christina how has that landed for
00:43:50you I'm frustrated I want to shake him and be like oh my god I'm not that way
00:43:55inclined you know I can do everything by myself I don't need Kiran I want Kiran I
00:44:06wonder how much of what you're experiencing is what's going on here and
00:44:11how much of it is what's happened in the past because you know we know that
00:44:15when we're in relationships sometimes the issues that have happened with our
00:44:18ex can kind of raise their ugly head in our current relationship and it could be
00:44:23difficult to work out like what's my ex stuff and what's the current stuff so
00:44:28one thing I told myself is that I don't want to have to carry someone again why
00:44:34do you think you are gonna have to carry me I don't know it's just something that
00:44:39I've had in previous relationships I'm not your ex-partners good point I am not
00:44:46your ex-partners there is only one Steena she's very unique and she's got a
00:44:51lot to offer you know I'm I know my worth and I know what I deserve
00:45:00here and I can see how heavily this is weighing for you I can see that you're
00:45:08getting triggered by previous relationships and the pain from that my
00:45:13concern is that it would be very easy for you to project that fear on to
00:45:19Christina and to retreat and say I want to be by myself which is a safe place
00:45:24for you to be but you could miss out on something great
00:45:30okay let's go to the decision Christina we'll start with you I have put 110%
00:45:44into this and I feel like I've really worked on myself and I see the potential
00:45:54in you you're an amazing guy so yeah I'm going to stay
00:46:10something I've done for every relationship I've been in is neglect my
00:46:13own feelings and I've went through them putting them first I have to remember
00:46:18I'm in this experiment as well and this is about my feelings as much as it is
00:46:21Christina's it's also about me on so this is something that I am bringing
00:46:25forward and I'm trying to put myself first but I don't want to lose out on
00:46:34you I really don't I want you to be more than a friend and I really hope that
00:46:41we can make this work and I know it's down to me now and I can promise you I'll
00:46:46try my best so for that reason I'd like to stay
00:46:55all right you two well you've got some work to do this week maybe this is a
00:47:01good point to do a bit of a list on these are the ways that she differs from
00:47:06previous partners I would bet that if you delve a little bit deeper you're
00:47:10finding Christina and number of characteristics that show you that you
00:47:14can trust her and that she intends to be around for the long haul have a
00:47:19really good look at what is on offer here because it's it's good
00:47:28good on you I am gonna take this time seriously and really understand what's
00:47:40going on in my brain and and just sit myself down and say Kieran what do you
00:47:43want do you want this girl because she is amazing and you could potentially
00:47:47lose out on her or do you not it's now down to me
00:47:54and finally on the couch Alex and Holly
00:48:02good to see the two of you so talk to me how are you both feeling so I've been
00:48:16home for a few days I went to see my children and I needed some time to think
00:48:21about what I wanted with people that know me from growing up and it's done
00:48:28okay I understand that Alex how were you feeling throughout the last few days
00:48:34when Holly wasn't around you Holly left no communication yeah I've kind of just
00:48:42been left in the dark I've not known what's going on in Holly's
00:48:46head not knowing what's going on in my own marriage and yeah it's been a tough
00:48:52week Holly when you on the couch the last time you spoke things through with
00:48:59us and it was like the most positive that we've seen the two of you what's
00:49:03happened since then last week yes I was happy because it was one good week what
00:49:10I thought you know what maybe it's getting better but there were still
00:49:14things in that time that I thought no the night that I decided I needed to get
00:49:21home was because me Shannon and Ryan was going for food and I invited Alex
00:49:29we've got to the lift and he went God what's up with everyone I went some of
00:49:33us are missing our kids Alex because me and Ryan I just had hard phone calls of
00:49:36our kids he turned around to me and went fuck this I can't be asked I'm not
00:49:41coming for me instantly I thought you know what you've got no respect for the
00:49:47fact I'm a mom and then a comment was made about why would come on this
00:49:53experiment if you've got kids because I'm just like every single other person
00:49:58I deserve love too that's why I come in on this experiment you know what Holly
00:50:05she puts on a brave face and you know acts like everything's okay so if Holly's
00:50:11missing their kids how am I gonna know that she's missing their kids because
00:50:14hasn't shown me or when we're in bed she hasn't told me or as my husband it's
00:50:18your duty of care to ask me am I okay because I've sat there on FaceTime to my
00:50:23children before sobbing my eyes out when my daughter read me a poem she'd done
00:50:27and you didn't even look at me I come off the phone you didn't speak to me
00:50:31you didn't ask me if I'm okay do I want a hug
00:50:36my voice is never heard when I try and speak to you go I'm speaking
00:50:43you need to understand me now listen don't try and come on here and put on
00:50:48some big act you're not fooling nobody babe you are a bullshitting bastard
00:50:52I've had enough of your shit
00:51:05you need to understand me now don't try and come on here and put on some big act
00:51:10you're not fooling nobody babe you are a bullshitting bastard I've had enough of
00:51:14your shit I don't give a shit I'm not holding back anymore I feel like a
00:51:24weight's been lifted off my shoulders god damn I can't breathe that's good
00:51:27whoa I mean
00:51:32what a queen
00:51:36you know I just have to say this yes there's many things that this man needs
00:51:41to work on but you've done all this up in his face at the same time you know
00:51:46what I mean two wrongs don't make a right on this I saw red flags from week
00:51:53one oh you stayed what did I write leave so I saw red flags from week one I was
00:52:00like you know what benefit of the doubt can I just state something I can't even
00:52:05finish a sentence today yeah I'm actually doing it what you do so it's
00:52:09very frustrating okay let's let Alex finish his point and then we'll come to
00:52:18you that is that okay obviously there's been differences over the past couple
00:52:23weeks and the way we approach things me I like to tackle things if something
00:52:29bothers me I'm gonna address it pretty much instantly whereas if Holly left no
00:52:35communication which has been our problem from day one why doesn't Holly feel like
00:52:43she can speak to me I don't know like you know why Alex because you sit there
00:52:48with your scowls you chomp your teeth you look at me like this that and the
00:52:52other I mean I'm the one that's been called names over the past couple weeks
00:52:59I've never called you back a name it's the way you act it's the way you say
00:53:07things the icing on the cake for me was that last week at the commitment
00:53:11ceremony how he speaks to women not only myself but the girls I'm so sorry every
00:53:19time I apologize on behalf of him it's embarrassing he's rude he's arrogant I
00:53:26remember do the hell I am and I don't pull with this I don't try and be
00:53:35disrespectful to people apart from if I feel like I'm being attacked I can't see
00:53:40myself in a third-person view so if I've done something wrong just let me know
00:53:44and I can fix the behavior I'm sorry but I do tell you and it starts an argument
00:53:52everyone told you I'm sorry but it's bullshit it is a whole hell of bullshit
00:54:06I think what we're seeing here is that you're both doing this to each other and
00:54:10I think what's really clear here is that the respect has gone what we would like
00:54:18to be able to hear today from the two of you is the parts that each of you
00:54:24have played in getting to this really uncomfortable point in your relationship
00:54:31for me personally I like someone to bring out the best in me also like tell
00:54:37me where I'm going wrong don't be scared to you know because what am I gonna do
00:54:41like I did explain before if you to listen that I've never felt like I can
00:54:46step to you and say do you know what Alex this is how I feel because I've
00:54:50never heard and it was so refreshing to go home and be heard
00:54:57that's good what I can see is that two of you are quite hurt and that's that's
00:55:03really really sad for us to see over the last few weeks the two of you have had a
00:55:10number of different arguments but you've been able to resolve it and you've been
00:55:15able to move forward what you both need to decide is whether you think you can
00:55:22resolve this let's go to decisions Alex
00:55:33this week's been a tough week you know I didn't know what was going on with Holly
00:55:39and I've had things coming at me from all angles and I genuinely think I've
00:55:44held myself well
00:55:49at times I've been misunderstood I'm sick of having to defend my marriage one
00:55:55week we're good next week we're not and I just need some consistency at this
00:56:00point there's been things that I've seen over the past few weeks I'm just like
00:56:05you know not a bit of me
00:56:09so
00:56:13leave
00:56:21Holly what's your decision
00:56:26I was so drawn to finding love I counted every blessing every night that
00:56:36I was going to come here and be swept off my feet
00:56:43I lost my part of myself giving so much to this relationship
00:56:50I do think you can be a good guy
00:57:02but for me
00:57:10you're not mr. right I'm leaving
00:57:19you
00:57:23the two of you have written leave so that means of course this is the end of
00:57:30the experiment for you I just want to say to the two of you thank you so much
00:57:37for being very honest I feel like you've really both been quite mature in the way
00:57:44that you've communicated how you feel we wish you all the very best take care
00:58:02I came into this process looking for my special forever person
00:58:09you actually hurt
00:58:15we're just not each other's people we haven't had to happy ever after I was
00:58:20hoping for
00:58:23because I watched
00:58:26this is actually heartbreaking I feel numb right now this person who was
00:58:36supposed to be my person isn't my person
00:58:46it's sad that I didn't find the love I wanted
00:58:50love guys love you so much love you hoes love these guys but I believe my
00:58:59forever person is out there next time Adam you'll be paired with Amy it's
00:59:07partner swap week Lacey you'll be paired with Luke for fuck's sake
00:59:12sparking conflict for some new pairings he was throwing shade on me Luke has
00:59:17pissed me off and I do want an apology out of him and stirring insecurities in
00:59:21others what size panties are you I can't sleep in my ring or my clothes
00:59:29it's actually making me feel quite sick sorry oh it's just knocked me a bit but
00:59:34it's a disastrous double date this is the worst golfing session I've ever had
00:59:38in my life that sparks the biggest upset of the experiment you and the ex-partner
00:59:42it's actually scary how similar you are I am human I'm not his ex
00:59:59you