Married at First Sight UK S9 Episode 30
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00:00:00Good morning, universe!
00:00:02Previously, homestays were a family affair.
00:00:05I'll snap him out.
00:00:07As Polly and Adam made a major breakthrough...
00:00:09You've actually shocked me.
00:00:11You can actually be gloving and a really nice lady.
00:00:14Yes!
00:00:17..for Christina and Kieran...
00:00:19I need to figure out the situation and know what the right move is
00:00:21to take next. ..time apart pushed them to consider their fate.
00:00:24Consider yourself spending the rest of your life with him.
00:00:26Yeah, I do really like him.
00:00:28Christina deserves somebody to love her.
00:00:30I'm going to get upset now.
00:00:32..and for Sasha and Ross...
00:00:34SHE LAUGHS
00:00:36..the pull of loved ones...
00:00:38Can't touch this thing?
00:00:39No!
00:00:41..raised uncertainties.
00:00:43I need to be here.
00:00:44I really can't be away from them.
00:00:46He kills me.
00:00:48But it was Luke's thoughtless comments...
00:00:50In here, you look a bit, like, bloated.
00:00:52Luke's saying I basically look hideous.
00:00:55..and a disastrous meeting.
00:00:57Adult entertainment, is that something you see yourself doing
00:00:59moving forward?
00:01:00This is definitely an attempt to assassinate my character.
00:01:03..that left the marriage...
00:01:04As of now, I'm a single man. ..hanging in the balance.
00:01:08Well, **** then.
00:01:09I don't know why you're still sat here.
00:01:11Maybe it's not meant to be after all.
00:01:16..tonight...
00:01:18I've seen a sight of Polly that I feel giggling and smiling.
00:01:21..the final commitment ceremony brings out the best in some couples.
00:01:25I feel like we're tap-dancing round the love at the minute.
00:01:28I haven't felt this way about someone before.
00:01:30..as tensions continue for others.
00:01:33I felt humiliated, I felt disrespected, I felt violated.
00:01:37Why can't you grow the **** up?
00:01:39It makes me feel uncomfortable.
00:01:40I can't feel anything but anger towards him right now.
00:01:43..and after a difficult homestay apart...
00:01:45To go from that wedding to then how we are now,
00:01:49that is what kills me.
00:01:51..Kieran and his wife,
00:01:53I just don't know how much I've got in us
00:01:55for the amount of emotional support Christina needs.
00:01:58..while the dilemma of where to call home...
00:02:00Moving to this situation, it's affecting me.
00:02:03..pushes Sasha and Ross to crisis point.
00:02:06I really wanted to do everything I could to make you happy.
00:02:10I think Barnes' spread's gone a bit hard.
00:02:13SHE LAUGHS
00:02:15After time away at homestays,
00:02:17the couples are back at the apartments.
00:02:20What are you wearing today?
00:02:21My blue commode with a little bit of green.
00:02:25I'm so excited about the future.
00:02:27I'm so excited about the future!
00:02:29I'm so excited about the future!
00:02:31It's the most exciting time in my life.
00:02:33I'm so excited about my future.
00:02:35It's the most exciting time in my life.
00:02:37My blue coward with feather arms.
00:02:40You're going to look like a peacock.
00:02:42SHE LAUGHS
00:02:44It's like a football.
00:02:45It is, isn't it?
00:02:47THEY LAUGH
00:02:51Are they? That's rock solid.
00:02:53THEY LAUGH
00:02:58It's not a good thing for me and Christina to be apart.
00:03:01She's always in my mind. You know what you're doing, what you're up to.
00:03:06Christina is one of the most amazing girls I could ever wish to meet.
00:03:09She's beautiful inside and out.
00:03:12I care about the girl. I care about how she feels.
00:03:16All I've ever done is put other people first.
00:03:19I need to focus on what I want out of life and where I want to be
00:03:22and who I want to do that with.
00:03:29I haven't seen Kieran since the really emotional dinner party.
00:03:33I've missed him.
00:03:34I haven't stopped thinking about him.
00:03:36I just want to know that he's all right.
00:03:40It hurts because we were really happy.
00:03:45He knows that I want a future with him and I'm fighting for him.
00:03:56So, I actually enjoyed seeing all your family again.
00:03:59Your mum made me feel ridiculously welcome.
00:04:02I didn't want you to feel out of place or uncomfortable,
00:04:05like you couldn't do anything.
00:04:07I've seen a different side to you that I preferred.
00:04:10Yeah. I feel like you seeing that and your positive response to that,
00:04:15I feel like that's definitely something that I've got to be more mindful of.
00:04:19Me and Adam are in genuinely one of the best positions
00:04:22we've ever been in.
00:04:24The way Adam was with me when we were at my homestays
00:04:27was just a lot more relaxed.
00:04:28He gravitated towards me more, was really nice to see.
00:04:33Hopefully, it can continue now we're back in the apartment,
00:04:36do you know what I mean?
00:04:37Me and Polly are in a pretty good place at the moment.
00:04:40We've always said we like that we're both family-orientated
00:04:43and she's so close with her family.
00:04:46I would like to think this new side of Polly will continue.
00:04:49Time will tell and we've just got to see what will happen.
00:04:53Me and Luke haven't benefitted from homestays at all.
00:04:57It started shit, it ended shit.
00:05:00He's made an awful first impression in front of my friends.
00:05:03I've not seen him since and we've stayed in separate apartments.
00:05:09I'm absolutely dreading seeing Luke at the commitment ceremony today.
00:05:13Right now, I just feel so much anger towards him.
00:05:16I don't even want to look at his face.
00:05:18I just want to be with him.
00:05:20I don't even want to look at his face.
00:05:22I just feel so let down.
00:05:24As soon as somebody lies to me, that breaks the trust.
00:05:27I have no idea what goes on in his brain.
00:05:30I have no idea why he lies and I have no time left for it.
00:05:39I haven't seen Amy since I took the ring off at the restaurant
00:05:42with her friends.
00:05:44I really wanted to meet Amy's friends
00:05:47and I feel like Amy squandered the opportunity
00:05:49by dealing with it the way she did on the night.
00:05:52I feel like there was an agenda to upset me, to attack me
00:05:56and Amy seemed to be the one that was egging it on,
00:05:58so I find that very hurtful.
00:06:01And I took my ring off.
00:06:03And, yeah, it just makes me feel even more disappointed.
00:06:07I'm in no shape or form any better in terms of deciding
00:06:10what my headspace is at with Amy.
00:06:20Homestays went really, really well.
00:06:23Other than the confusion on where to move to,
00:06:26we did have a good homestays.
00:06:30But this morning, I'm feeling pretty deflated.
00:06:34Me and Ross had an argument last night.
00:06:36Ross drew his dummy at the pram for absolutely no reason.
00:06:40I'm at the end of my tether.
00:06:43He doesn't have to react the way he does.
00:06:45My drama is your drama, your drama is my drama.
00:06:48In recent weeks, Sasha and Ross have found it difficult
00:06:52to resolve conflict in their marriage.
00:06:54You should have your wife's back, always.
00:06:57I will have it.
00:06:58I'm your problem, Ross. I am.
00:07:00Ross doesn't say a word to me, Sian.
00:07:03Grabs his two suitcases, starts putting all his trainers in.
00:07:07Honest to God, it was awful.
00:07:09No, no, wedding ring falling across the...
00:07:12I was just about to do it now.
00:07:14I am not comfortable with you being in this apartment.
00:07:19I feel like shit, because last night, Sasha had to shoot to work.
00:07:23It was stupid. I had enough.
00:07:25I just wanted to leave, because it's too much for me.
00:07:29I've not seen her since. I've not spoken to her.
00:07:37Hello, my baby girl.
00:07:43How's your homestay been?
00:07:45Our homestay was really good,
00:07:47but literally, the day we get back, out for a drink,
00:07:52all of a sudden, out of nowhere, Ross...
00:07:55..lost his temper and stormed off.
00:08:00I locked my temper.
00:08:03But it's not just me, though. It's Sasha as well.
00:08:06She does have a fire in her.
00:08:07Have you spoke to her?
00:08:09Oh, yeah. That was yesterday.
00:08:12Ross, you messaged Sasha, saying,
00:08:15stay in separate rooms tonight.
00:08:17That's a lot. You're both very angry.
00:08:21When he left, he texted me, saying,
00:08:23I can do better, and everyone will see that I deserve better.
00:08:27The only person I can see that deserves better is me.
00:08:30Because I've put so much into the relationship.
00:08:33I completely support him, and I'm not going to let him down.
00:08:36I'm not going to let him down, and I'm not going to let him down.
00:08:39I've put so much into the relationship.
00:08:41I completely support him all the time.
00:08:43You deserve better than that.
00:08:44But, yeah, what more do you want? What more can I give?
00:08:47Her response was, good luck finding somebody
00:08:51who puts up with your shit.
00:08:54It's never going to get sorted, calling each other names.
00:08:59I basically just texted him to say,
00:09:01you're literally the one in the wrong,
00:09:02and you're treating me like it's me.
00:09:04He's not even apologised. Oh.
00:09:07You can get argumentative, but my anger in comparison to Ross's
00:09:12is completely different.
00:09:13Like, Ross likes to break things, throw things,
00:09:15like, food up the wall.
00:09:17Not acceptable.
00:09:18So, I thought he'd wake up thinking, God, that was really bad,
00:09:21whatever I spoke to Sasha yesterday.
00:09:22But he's not said a word to me.
00:09:25Are you thinking now about long-term,
00:09:28and if you can do this in the long run?
00:09:31The moving situation, quite difficult.
00:09:33Right.
00:09:34On homestays, like, I ended up thinking,
00:09:40oh, I don't think Manchester's the right place.
00:09:43When this whole time I've been so set on Manchester.
00:09:48She wanted to be with the family. Mm.
00:09:50Same for me.
00:09:51Plus, I've got a daughter back at home as well. Yeah.
00:09:53So, it's pretty hard.
00:09:55I head it all over the place, and I can't think what's what.
00:09:59I think it's a lot to do with the pressures of the experiment.
00:10:01Yeah, definitely.
00:10:04I don't know. I don't know what we're going to do, to be honest.
00:10:06It's a mess. Mm.
00:10:08Like, the relationship is messy.
00:10:16I've got a lot of things on my mind.
00:10:18Honestly, I can't wait to meet the expert.
00:10:21I just need to pull it all out,
00:10:22because the more I keep hold of it, I'll probably struggle more.
00:10:27I do need to show him the temper.
00:10:30Yeah, that'll do me to show him as well.
00:10:34This is my first time thinking about this decision,
00:10:37because it's too much.
00:10:39It's a lot.
00:10:42I'm extremely confused on what to do
00:10:44at the commitment ceremony today.
00:10:46There's a beautiful connection between me and Ross,
00:10:49and we should maybe fight for it,
00:10:50but Ross takes it too far when there's a disagreement.
00:10:56I don't know what is best anymore.
00:10:59I'm not sure I can tolerate it any longer.
00:11:05BELL CHIMES
00:11:08BELL CHIMES
00:11:35Well, here we are for your last commitment ceremony.
00:11:38We know, with the finish line in sight,
00:11:41you'll be thinking more and more about what it will take
00:11:45to make your marriage last long-term.
00:11:49This is your last chance to come to us
00:11:52with any issues, worries or requests for advice.
00:11:56So, please, don't squander that.
00:12:04First up to the couch, can I have...
00:12:12..Amy and Luke, come on up.
00:12:14APPLAUSE
00:12:19Welcome, guys. Thank you.
00:12:24So, without a doubt, this is the furthest you two
00:12:28have sat apart from each other.
00:12:30Why are we at this distance right now?
00:12:33Um, where do we start?
00:12:36Let's start the last time that we saw you.
00:12:38We'll go back to the dinner party.
00:12:40We heard something that, Luke, you had mentioned to Lacey.
00:12:45So, what was that?
00:12:47So, Luke made quite a big deal about this photo of Lacey and Adam,
00:12:51saying that he's glad that I act with integrity and have class.
00:12:56However, when I spoke to Lacey, he'd said to Lacey,
00:12:59I'm actually really envious because I wish my own wife
00:13:02behaved that way.
00:13:06What I meant was, you know, I was envious that me and Amy
00:13:09weren't like that, you know, we don't dance like that.
00:13:12I just think it's bullshit.
00:13:14Excuses, and I just can't connect with it.
00:13:18OK.
00:13:20So, then, from there, we go to homestays.
00:13:24Luke, walk me through your homestay.
00:13:27I walked in a bit before to switch everything on,
00:13:30and there was a photo of me and a girl that I worked with.
00:13:33And I thought, hang on, I don't want Amy to walk into my house
00:13:36and see a random girl strapped around my arm.
00:13:41So, I got a pair of scissors and I cut the girl out.
00:13:44Amy walks in, she says,
00:13:46oh, who was on the other side of the photo?
00:13:48I said, no, the photo was printed like that.
00:13:51She said, no, Luke, it's wonky.
00:13:53And then, after a minute, I said, Amy, I just lied to you,
00:13:56I don't know why, I didn't need to.
00:13:59OK.
00:14:00Started the homestay on a lie.
00:14:02Caught yourself on the lie.
00:14:05The issue is that if you want to establish any amount of trust,
00:14:10you have to consistently be...
00:14:13..truthful. Of course.
00:14:16How can she continue any relationship with you
00:14:20if you can't be truthful?
00:14:22I'm feeling so disconnected with this person.
00:14:25Every single time we go to move forward,
00:14:29he does something and we just go straight back.
00:14:33We went to a castle and Luke made another sexual comment
00:14:38and we ended up having an argument then.
00:14:40We told you this, but, Amy, I don't think it was a sexual comment.
00:14:44We were speaking about walking my dog
00:14:46and he made that into a sexual comment.
00:14:48Why can't I walk my dog?
00:14:50Why can't you read the room, grow the fuck up and realise,
00:14:54it makes me feel uncomfortable.
00:14:56Why do you not care? All you care about is yourself.
00:14:59OK. Why are you rolling your eyes?
00:15:01I don't think it was sexual.
00:15:02It was basically about, can you see yourself living in Kent?
00:15:05Yeah, I can see myself bringing John the dog for exercise.
00:15:09Not only John, his exercise.
00:15:11And we'd slept together the night before,
00:15:13so it's like, what does this man want from me?
00:15:15Hey, that's why it was a little joke.
00:15:17Read the room.
00:15:19So, homestay ends rocky.
00:15:22So, you go into your homestay.
00:15:25What happens?
00:15:27We went into my mum's house
00:15:29and there's a photograph of me when I was 18.
00:15:33And Luke says, oh, is this before the glow-up?
00:15:36And he was like, you look a lot more bloated on this.
00:15:42It's like, your teeth, your lips, I just don't know what's going on.
00:15:46It's like, your teeth, your lips,
00:15:48I just don't understand why those comments were made.
00:15:52All I was saying was that I prefer how you look now.
00:15:54You'd like to think that after making some changes
00:15:57at a certain cost that you're going to improve,
00:15:59and I thought you did improve.
00:16:01That if there were the two girls in front of me,
00:16:03I would pick this one now.
00:16:06Babe, if you go into a girl's house and say,
00:16:08you practically said you look fucking fat on this photo...
00:16:11No, bloated doesn't mean fat.
00:16:13Bloated means you look a bit bloated.
00:16:18OK, so once again, misunderstanding in the communication,
00:16:22which happens over and over and over again with both of you.
00:16:26I think reading the room is a real theme here.
00:16:29The impression we're getting is that you're not watching Amy,
00:16:31you're not reading Amy.
00:16:33But I struggle to understand sometimes how you're feeling.
00:16:36I don't know sometimes whether it's because facial expressions
00:16:39don't come across so well.
00:16:44No, we're not going to take that.
00:16:46We're talking about your capacity to read your partner.
00:16:51And we're hearing so many examples here of you
00:16:54completely missing the cues.
00:16:56So either you're not demonstrating empathy
00:16:59or you're choosing to overlook them.
00:17:01Mm, I'm not going to agree with you on that one.
00:17:05And you're not going to blame her face.
00:17:08Quite frankly, what you need to be doing is reading your partner.
00:17:13She's telling you these comments make her feel uncomfortable.
00:17:17That should be all that matters.
00:17:19That's what's important here.
00:17:23I know, and it doesn't make me feel good to know that I've done that.
00:17:26But from my point of view, I feel like it's very difficult
00:17:31because everything I do or say is not right or inappropriate.
00:17:37It gets worse. Jeez.
00:17:40We walked in to meet my friends,
00:17:42my best friend Alex wasn't at the wedding and basically said,
00:17:46Luke, tell me about yourself, tell me about your job.
00:17:48What do you do in your spare time?
00:17:51This is still a very sensitive subject to me
00:17:52because I've just found out my husband's a butler in the buff,
00:17:54which he told me he wasn't.
00:17:57So I was saying, do you want to tell her what else you do?
00:18:00And he was like, oh, there's an agenda here.
00:18:03He was like, I don't have anything else to say now.
00:18:06Took his wedding ring off and went, I'm single.
00:18:09And you were kind of egging them on,
00:18:10oh, but tell them, tell them, tell them what you do.
00:18:13Because I did one job with an apron on.
00:18:15So it's just one now? I thought it was three.
00:18:17One job. And then it was two and now it's one.
00:18:19One job I did with an apron. One, OK.
00:18:21I thought it was more than that.
00:18:22And this is how my wife's introducing me to her friends.
00:18:25I felt like Quasimodo being taken around Paris.
00:18:29Here's the Muppet, here's the butler in the buff, here's the liar.
00:18:32That's how you introduce me to your friends.
00:18:35I felt humiliated, I felt disrespected, I felt violated.
00:18:38Why are you ashamed about it? It's your job.
00:18:40I'm not ashamed of it. I'll talk about it. I'm not ashamed of it.
00:18:42Why? Because you introduced me like that.
00:18:48All right.
00:18:50Amy, you want to have truth and transparency
00:18:55and honesty in your relationship.
00:18:57The only way that you can get that is that you have to create
00:19:00an environment where that becomes the standard.
00:19:05But you don't create a safe environment for Luke.
00:19:12This is the first time he's meeting your friends.
00:19:15Clearly, he wants to make a good impression.
00:19:18How do you think he felt in that moment?
00:19:21Probably a little bit intimidated, but...
00:19:23You know, what's interesting is that you're not even listening to him.
00:19:26Because he just told you how he felt.
00:19:28He just said, I felt humiliated.
00:19:30Hmm.
00:19:32Regardless of lies in the past,
00:19:34you are failing to just acknowledge your role in this.
00:19:39Yes, there's a lot that he has to do,
00:19:42but this process is about each of us becoming better.
00:19:46So if you want the transparency, you have to show up and say,
00:19:50you know what, I'm going to create a safe environment for you.
00:19:52Yeah.
00:19:53You have to be empathetic, to stay in the moment and say,
00:19:55you felt humiliated and I'm sorry for my role in that, period.
00:20:00Hmm.
00:20:03You removed your ring.
00:20:05Yeah.
00:20:06Why?
00:20:07It was the definition of an immature person, Paul.
00:20:10I should have kept my cool.
00:20:12I regretted it the moment I took it off.
00:20:15Yep. And, you know, Luke, I know you adore Amy.
00:20:20I think part of your lying is because you may not feel in your heart
00:20:24that you're enough for her.
00:20:25And you're constantly trying to figure out
00:20:27how you could fit into her world.
00:20:29These are issues that you have.
00:20:32You have to know that you are enough.
00:20:36So my only question to you right now is,
00:20:39can you consistently be truthful?
00:20:43I'd like to think I have the ability.
00:20:46The lies that I say, they are white lies.
00:20:50But I have to take accountability of what I do.
00:20:53She's just asking for you to be honest.
00:20:54I know. You know, it's a simple request.
00:20:56I know.
00:20:59OK.
00:21:01Let's go to the decision.
00:21:04Amy, why don't you kick things off for us?
00:21:09I feel like I could see such great potential between us.
00:21:13And when we have the conversations about the lies,
00:21:16I'm thinking to myself, yes, we're getting somewhere.
00:21:18We're going to get better.
00:21:23But...
00:21:25Homestays have just been absolutely awful.
00:21:28You absolutely humiliated me in front of my friends.
00:21:33It brought out a side of me that I've never seen before.
00:21:38And I really don't want to be that person.
00:21:41And for that reason...
00:21:44..I put leave.
00:21:50OK.
00:21:55Luke?
00:21:57I was in a dilemma.
00:22:00How can I say stay when I make her feel like this?
00:22:04I want you to be happy.
00:22:05This is the first and the last thing I want, you being happy.
00:22:08Perhaps I'm not good enough to make her happy.
00:22:11As painful as that is, if it's the truth, it's the truth.
00:22:18But...
00:22:21..I really like her.
00:22:22I feel she's really good for me.
00:22:25So I'm willing to try everything I've got left in me
00:22:29to give you a glimpse that I can be the Luke that I need to be for you.
00:22:33And for that reason, I said I'm going to stay.
00:22:47We know if one member of the couple runs away,
00:22:52rights stay, then the couple needs to stay.
00:22:58Amy, are you willing to stay and work on the marriage?
00:23:10I don't know where we can go from here, if I'm honest.
00:23:22Amy, are you willing to stay and work on the marriage?
00:23:35I don't know where we can go from here, if I'm honest.
00:23:49Amy, are you willing to stay and work on the marriage?
00:23:53If you have anything left in you and you can prove that you can go
00:23:58a few days without lying, then that's a start.
00:24:02But if it continues, then I don't want to carry on.
00:24:08That's a very fair request.
00:24:12Thank you. Thank you very much.
00:24:13Well done, you two. Well done, guys.
00:24:15Good work.
00:24:16Amy letting leave, I did not see that coming.
00:24:19I feel upset, but mostly I think I feel disappointed in myself
00:24:23that I have caused this woman to want to leave our relationship.
00:24:29I'm not a quitter, so I am going to take the expert's advice on board,
00:24:32but I can't feel anything but anger towards him right now.
00:24:36And I have no idea where we're going to go from here.
00:24:40Next up on the couch...
00:24:46..Nathan and Lacey.
00:24:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
00:24:51Hello, you all right?
00:24:53Hello, guys. Welcome back.
00:24:55Thank you. It's nice to be back.
00:24:58You look like you're happy. Yeah.
00:25:00It's a good sign.
00:25:03So, Nathan and Lacey, you've been married for a year now.
00:25:07It's a good sign.
00:25:09Let's start with the homestays.
00:25:13Nathan, what was it like meeting Lacey's mum again
00:25:17after that incident when you said something negative about her cooking?
00:25:23Yeah, so she said,
00:25:24oh, no, don't worry about it.
00:25:26She was amazing, honestly, such a great host.
00:25:29Really good mum, really loving person.
00:25:33Honestly, couldn't have picked a better homestay.
00:25:35They loved him. Yeah.
00:25:38So, it sounds like, Nathan, you're in there.
00:25:40Yeah, I mean, she's got me doing a bit of DIY round the house.
00:25:45Oh, you're definitely in.
00:25:48Yeah, it was really good.
00:25:49And her mum helped her, giving her a load of reassurance.
00:25:53I just want to be the best partner I can be for him.
00:25:57She's an over-thinker.
00:25:59Like, for example, if I go off into a daydream,
00:26:01or I can look sad, but it's just my face expression,
00:26:04she might think in her head,
00:26:06am I thinking about her in a negative way?
00:26:08But if I felt sad, I'd let her know.
00:26:10So, if I don't, then you're sweet. Yeah.
00:26:14That needs a bit of mummer advice.
00:26:16Yeah. Telling Lacey, no, you've got a good one there,
00:26:17you're not failing, you know, you're doing a good job.
00:26:22I suppose it's about just getting to know what works for your partner.
00:26:26Because if you're not saying how you feel,
00:26:29then it does leave space for a partner to wonder, is everything OK?
00:26:33Yeah.
00:26:35Nathan, Lacey needs to hear your voice, not your silence.
00:26:41You should be thinking, how can I over-communicate?
00:26:43Because it's never going to be too much for Lacey.
00:26:46This is what she... Tell me about it.
00:26:48Yeah, it's never going to be too much.
00:26:50I definitely appreciate that.
00:26:51When I wander off, it can be a bit of a concern,
00:26:54and you might need me to go, no, it's all right.
00:26:56I do, but I do it more.
00:26:58You know, I'll keep giving you a bit of reassurance. Yeah.
00:27:04Would you say the homestay was a good indicator
00:27:08that this could be our future? Yeah.
00:27:14I knew I had feelings for him.
00:27:17But since coming back, I've just got this rush of...
00:27:21I keep looking at him like...
00:27:24Yeah, I've got strong feelings. Yeah.
00:27:27It's reciprocated. I'm feeling you.
00:27:30I'm just wondering whether you've had an opportunity
00:27:33to speak about the distance.
00:27:34Do you know what? That's not even a worry any more.
00:27:37Because how I feel about him, I'd be stupid not to give it a go.
00:27:41And you would as well. Mm.
00:27:42Lacey just told you.
00:27:44Nathan, what are your thoughts?
00:27:47It's never really been an issue for me.
00:27:49And now seeing you with my family, and how much they, like, love you...
00:27:53You get on, yeah.
00:27:54..it just fits right in, you know? Yeah.
00:27:56I mean, this feels absolutely perfect.
00:27:58Yeah.
00:28:00I suppose that confirms that actually there's something
00:28:02really growing here between the two of you.
00:28:04Yeah. Definitely. Yeah, it's good, yeah.
00:28:09Let's go to the decisions.
00:28:11Shall we start with you, Nathan?
00:28:16I haven't felt this way about someone before.
00:28:19We communicate amazingly.
00:28:23I love chatting with people.
00:28:24Amazingly. I love chatting with you.
00:28:27You're like a good best friend.
00:28:34So, I put stay.
00:28:37APPLAUSE
00:28:41Erm...
00:28:43So, I definitely feel like my feelings for Nathan
00:28:45are getting stronger.
00:28:47You're my safe place, but my best friend, my family approve.
00:28:51And they said if we don't work out, they still want to know, yeah?
00:28:55And it is heading in the love... It's going in.
00:28:57Yeah, I feel like we're tap-dancing around the love at the minute.
00:29:01So, yeah, of course, I'd love to stay.
00:29:04CHEERING
00:29:10Well, we can't wait to see how this progresses.
00:29:13We want to wish you all the best.
00:29:15So, good luck, guys. Well done.
00:29:16Go and live your life. Thank you, guys.
00:29:19Yeah.
00:29:24That was lovely.
00:29:26Are you happy with that? Really happy.
00:29:28Thank you, babe. Thank you, baby.
00:29:36Next up on the couch, we have...
00:29:39..Ross and Sasha.
00:29:41Go on, Sasha.
00:29:45You've got this.
00:29:47Hello, you two.
00:29:50Oh, God, she's going to cry already.
00:29:56Wow.
00:29:58Just got to call it straight away.
00:30:00You don't look happy, you two.
00:30:20I don't know.
00:30:22It's just a bit of arguments, really.
00:30:28It is an overwhelming stage of the experiment.
00:30:31Tension has built, and we can help you with that.
00:30:36Perhaps, Sasha, why don't we start with you?
00:30:40First off, I just want to say...
00:30:43..I know that my emotional regulation is bad.
00:30:47I can be argumentative, you know I can.
00:30:49You've seen how I can be argumentative.
00:30:52How I've been with Alex, for example.
00:30:55The issue is, when Ross gets a temper...
00:31:00..how bad it is.
00:31:02He's got this attitude and this tone.
00:31:05Food gets thrown at the wall, I get called names.
00:31:09He was calling me a little fake bitch.
00:31:12The most recent time, it happened last night.
00:31:15I always thought, when today, he'd probably be like,
00:31:18oh, I can't believe I spoke to Sasha like that.
00:31:20But he didn't even speak to me.
00:31:23He doesn't even feel remorseful when he reacts the way he reacts.
00:31:27So I feel like I've got nothing to work with.
00:31:31Ross, I noticed as you're listening, you're shaking your head.
00:31:36It's not just me, OK?
00:31:38It can't be just me. I'm not flipping for no reason.
00:31:42You have a temper as well, don't you?
00:31:45Sometimes it's like the smallest thing.
00:31:48I was texting Kieran the one day once we got back in from the pub
00:31:50and he was like, what you kept texting Kieran for?
00:31:53No, no, no. Hang on, hang on.
00:31:55I caught an attitude. I went, well, what's the problem?
00:31:58And he picked up his food and he threw it at the wall.
00:32:01Talking about the Kieran situation,
00:32:03I did say to him, when we go back to the apartment,
00:32:05promise me we'll have the conversation before anything else.
00:32:08So, as soon as we got back to the apartment,
00:32:10the first thing she did was text Kieran.
00:32:11I was waiting, sitting down.
00:32:12That's what I got pissed off about.
00:32:14I know I was in the room for that.
00:32:15Is it OK? Am I allowed to do that?
00:32:17That's what she was on about to me and that's what pissed me off.
00:32:23The thing, when it comes to an argument,
00:32:25we don't all want to stop and the more it builds up,
00:32:27and that's where it gets worse.
00:32:31I'm not fit, honestly.
00:32:33Mm.
00:32:37Ross and Sasha, we've seen your fiery sides.
00:32:41In fact, that's one of the compatibility points
00:32:43for the two of you, is you are both incredibly passionate,
00:32:47but it can also lead to butting heads.
00:32:50This is about the dynamic between the two of you
00:32:52and you are both contributing to it.
00:32:55What I'm talking about here is the communication
00:32:58between the two of you that goes from zero to ten, boom.
00:33:01You're both seeing red, the conflict is elevating
00:33:05and you're blaming each other.
00:33:07I'm not hearing any examples of either of you taking a stand.
00:33:10You're taking accountability for what's going on.
00:33:13So, when you're in that challenging situation,
00:33:18rather than keep going, say to each other,
00:33:21we need to stop.
00:33:23Take a step back to give yourselves that time out to cool down.
00:33:28Then come back together with less emotion
00:33:31and talk through things.
00:33:33How can we work together to get what we both want?
00:33:41Yes.
00:33:47The idea here, guys, is to stop things
00:33:50before you get to that point.
00:33:52You also need to put some ground rules in place.
00:33:55No throwing things.
00:33:58No name-calling.
00:33:59No disrespectful behaviour at all.
00:34:03I agree with that 100%, yeah. Mm-hm.
00:34:07Sasha, you look concerned.
00:34:11I would love that time apart, just to come back
00:34:13and see each other's perspective.
00:34:16That's what I want. Mm-hm.
00:34:18Good.
00:34:20All right, so let's dig a little bit deeper about the last week.
00:34:25I understand you recently met Ross's daughter, Blue.
00:34:29Yeah, I got really emotional seeing him with his daughter
00:34:32because she was so excited to see him
00:34:35and I knew how much it meant to him.
00:34:38Ross, how was it for you observing Sasha with Blue?
00:34:59It's clear that the two of you really do care about each other
00:35:03and you're starting to have these really important,
00:35:07powerful conversations about what's life going to look like
00:35:11after the experiment.
00:35:14And I think the fact that you guys are experiencing tension as well
00:35:17makes it extra difficult.
00:35:19I agree with that, yeah.
00:35:22Ross, is there anything you'd like to say to her right now?
00:35:27The temper situation, I just want to say I'm very sorry.
00:35:32Hopefully, whatever advice you get from us,
00:35:35we will learn from it and be happy the way we were before.
00:35:43And do you accept his apology?
00:35:57I do accept his apology, yeah.
00:36:00It's a shame that that didn't come this morning.
00:36:04I've never felt for anyone the way I feel for you.
00:36:12One of the questions you asked me on our honeymoon was,
00:36:16do you fall in love easy?
00:36:18And I said, don't you know, I don't think I fall in love easy.
00:36:21I don't think I fall in love easy.
00:36:23I don't think I fall in love easy.
00:36:25And I said, absolutely not.
00:36:29But...
00:36:31..when I met you, you was everything that I wanted.
00:36:35So I thought...
00:36:39..the universe had, like, blessed me.
00:36:42And...
00:36:46..I really wanted to do everything I could to make you happy.
00:36:52You don't make me happy, babe. Oi, you don't make me happy.
00:36:55And I feel like I have bent over backwards in this process
00:36:58to do all that I can for you.
00:36:59Hey.
00:37:01And I've never done that for anyone the way I am with you.
00:37:04I've never... I've never been...
00:37:06I've never been that way.
00:37:08SHE SOBS
00:37:09Oh, my God.
00:37:12I feel... I just feel like...
00:37:15SHE SOBS
00:37:25It's all going to be my work, no matter what.
00:37:28I just want to make this work.
00:37:30I know we can.
00:37:31Because we're both very strong.
00:37:34I am willing to make this work and I'm going to face for it
00:37:36and I'm going to bring them back up here again
00:37:38so they can get their smile back in their face again.
00:37:41So, yeah.
00:37:44All right, well, I think we'll go to the decision for the two of you.
00:37:48Ross, we're going to start with you.
00:37:51To be honest, I couldn't wait to meet you guys.
00:37:54Right now, I do feel a lot better.
00:37:58That's what I meant when I said about willing to make this work
00:38:01and fight for it, because this is what I need,
00:38:04and I'm very sorry for what happened.
00:38:08Believe me when I say this,
00:38:10I'm going to make you back up here again
00:38:12and I want us to be on the right path.
00:38:14Be happy, yeah, and...
00:38:18Be happy, yeah, and shoot.
00:38:23Stay.
00:38:33And to you, Sasha.
00:38:36Obviously, you know how much I care about you.
00:38:42It's a lot. It's really deep.
00:38:45Because when things are good, it's magical.
00:38:52But...
00:38:54My head's just absolutely messed, to be honest.
00:38:58I definitely saw a different side to Ross.
00:39:01Having a husband that has a temper is a complete no.
00:39:08Even if we do get argumentative with each other,
00:39:11I don't think that's a good enough excuse
00:39:13to be throwing your food at the wall.
00:39:17Saying I'm a fake bitch.
00:39:20And I am absolutely emotionally drained.
00:39:31I did right leave.
00:39:44I am absolutely emotionally drained.
00:39:49I did right leave.
00:39:58SIGHS
00:40:02It wasn't an easy decision at all, because I couldn't decide.
00:40:07And that's why I thought I needed to leave.
00:40:09Hmm.
00:40:10needed to leave. So just to clarify, when one partner says stay and the other says
00:40:20leave, both partners stay for another week to continue to work on the
00:40:24relationship. Are you both prepared to do that?
00:40:32I'm up to stay like I said, I'm willing to make this work and I'm gonna fight for it.
00:40:37Now that you've had this conversation with us and with Ross, have you changed
00:40:42your decision in your mind? Well...
00:40:55Yeah, because I want to believe that the relationship will change.
00:41:01You can do this guys. Yeah, you're both on the same side here. Work together as a
00:41:09team. Well done you two.
00:41:18I'm stoked we got to this point. It's such a walk away, obviously I would be
00:41:24devastated, I would be gutted. Obviously I've hurt her, I've upset her, it's
00:41:30pretty shit feeling to be fair. I know that Ross means his apology and Ross
00:41:37sounds like he wants to fight for it, so I'm willing to fight for it with him
00:41:43because at the end of the day I do love Ross and I do want this to work.
00:41:51Next up, Polly and Adam.
00:42:05Greetings to the both of you. How are you doing man? Yeah we're good, well I'm good
00:42:09thank you. So let's go to partner swap. How did that go for both of you? Adam
00:42:16let's start with you. Me and Amy had a right laugh to be fair. Amy went to a lingerie
00:42:21shop to get some bits and bobs to kind of spice up the bedroom. I got edible bra
00:42:30for Polly and edible thong for me. I think you should swap. And I got a really nice
00:42:38four-piece matching set for Polly. I said to Adam like I really appreciate it, like
00:42:45I love the fact that you've done this, but in my mind it's like you've given me
00:42:49nothing. I've not been made to feel wanted or desired in that way now you've
00:42:54bought me lingerie. I've bought stuff with me that I've not yet put on because
00:42:57I haven't thought we were there. Okay. So I was like this is great but I feel like
00:43:03you've now gone from zero to a hundred. Polly's response wasn't what I was
00:43:08expecting. We had an argument where I said I keep coming out of my comfort zone
00:43:12for you and trying to do things that you want from me but it's not good
00:43:16enough. I was like I feel like you are being a bit selfish. I feel like it was
00:43:21just because it was that which you know has been a topic for us consistently.
00:43:27Yeah it was a big jump you know I mean probably should have been built up to.
00:43:31Okay. So I did get why she felt like it was just a bit of a kick in the teeth.
00:43:35Now that you clarified that that makes sense. So now moving into the homestays.
00:43:43So the first stop was Adams. Polly did you feel welcomed in Adams house? Yes and
00:43:51no because there was clearly no room for my stuff anywhere. It was a case of I'll
00:43:59just sit on the end of the sofa not touch anything because I don't want to
00:44:01fuck up your cushions. I didn't feel comfortable. I was just a knob and I
00:44:06apologize. I can't I can't say anything else. Okay so that was definitely a step
00:44:13back. How was the rest of the time at Adams? My best man from the wedding came
00:44:19around. Polly told Rich about the massive argument we had about the Stephen twist
00:44:24situation and it made me feel like Polly was saying to my friend I'm acting like
00:44:30Stephen now because that's what she wanted. Okay. And then we had a huge bust
00:44:36up in front of his mate while he was sitting on the sofa. I feel like I went
00:44:40in more because he was so shitty the whole day. It did get sorted but just not
00:44:47until after another bust up the next morning. Resolution on the conflict. We're
00:44:53now stronger as a couple. Yeah. Okay we now go into Polly's homestay. So how'd
00:44:58that go? Amazing. It was so good. Okay. Really good. I mean clearly Polly family
00:45:05means everything to you. Were you able to see Adam fitting within your family? Oh
00:45:11absolutely. It was just comfortable like it was just so natural to the point where
00:45:16I forgot about him being there. It was easy. Yeah. Yeah I was really nervous but
00:45:21the moment I walked in I've never been made feel like so comfortable and like
00:45:25it was actually really nice wasn't it? It was really nice. So Adam could you see at that
00:45:31moment actually fitting into Polly's family? Oh yeah definitely. This is good
00:45:35this is good.
00:45:39So overall you think about the homestays what do you believe you learn? That he's
00:45:46one very patient man. Very understanding of seeing how I have been throughout
00:45:53this compared to who I was at home and I do need to give him a little bit more
00:45:57credit than what I have. The week before we went to homestays I've seen a side to
00:46:03Polly that I've said to her like I'm not feeling it. You're being loud, you're
00:46:06swearing loads. It's a bit off-putting and then when we went to the homestays I
00:46:11was like you're like a completely different person. You're chilled, like you're
00:46:14giggling, you're smiling. Like how I think she should be. I just don't know if it's
00:46:19the experiment that's making her erupt. Okay. Yeah that when we were on our
00:46:25homestays we just gravitated towards each other even more. I feel like being
00:46:31at mine brought us closer together. Because he saw me like that he could see
00:46:37this is how she is all the time. I felt a huge shift. So we have said that I need
00:46:45to try and bring home Polly back to the apartment. So all of my focus and energy
00:46:49needs to be on him. Your focus and energy needs to be on Adam, on the relationship
00:46:55but also on yourself. Yeah. Adam you've made great progress and I
00:47:01believe you've probably delivered more in this relationship than you have in
00:47:04any previous relationship that you've been in. But there's more that you need
00:47:08to deliver. And I think you have it within you clearly to do it. So can we go
00:47:17to a decision? Yeah. Adam would you like to do the honors and go first? Right so
00:47:24this last week has been interesting. I think seeing you at your homestays has
00:47:29changed a lot of things. It was really nice to see you in your home environment
00:47:34and I'm excited to see what the rest of the process brings. So for that reason I
00:47:40said stay.
00:47:46We've had yeah a start from obviously a bad week that then improved and we spoke
00:47:56about obviously what we need to do and what we're gonna do. And yeah I've
00:47:59enjoyed it as much as I haven't but I feel like we've needed that for again
00:48:04us to be where we are. So I have decided to stay.
00:48:12Thank you both. Thank you so much. Thank you.
00:48:18That was so nice. Wasn't it? Yeah.
00:48:26Okay last up on the couch. Kieran and Christina.
00:48:35Hello. You alright? What's up guys?
00:48:39How are the two of you getting on?
00:48:50It's been a really tough week. I just feel like I'm drained. I understand
00:49:00Christina that this isn't an easy situation. I know of course you've had
00:49:04some time away but the dinner party you received an anonymous letter. Yeah. It
00:49:11seems like it brought up a lot of emotions for you. Oh it was so emotional
00:49:16reading it. I knew it would because I know the guys sat down there love us
00:49:22both as individuals and as a couple like they root for us. From their perspective
00:49:29there are things that we could still do to improve and it just made me flood
00:49:35with emotion. And I just got really passionate because I thought actually
00:49:41come on. I just felt really passionately like
00:49:45towards Kieran. I think everybody can see how much I care about him. How I admire
00:49:54you so much.
00:49:59And that's very courageous of you. Kieran what was it like to hear Christina say
00:50:04that actually she wants to fight for this? Receiving it was really difficult
00:50:09and I broke down when she was speaking. At some point we've all been in the
00:50:15position of put Christina in and it's not nice doing that at all. And I hate
00:50:21seeing you upset. So that night was a was very difficult at the dinner party.
00:50:28At the same time I'm thinking I'm so fucking proud of you right now. I'm still
00:50:33really proud of you for projecting what you want and what you believe in. So
00:50:39where are you guys at right now? We're doing homestays separate and that was
00:50:45because I didn't want to take Christina back to mine knowing where my head's at.
00:50:52I took Mel's advice and that was to go away and write down how Christina is
00:50:58different from me ex. And this is where it gets scary. The only difference that I
00:51:06could find and I really thought about this is that Christina is very outgoing.
00:51:15What is it that you're saying? I've been in this position before. I kind of go
00:51:22through my life just putting other people first all the time. I know
00:51:27Christina is a totally different girl and I do, you are, but I can't help but see
00:51:32similarities. Can't get past that.
00:51:46My outlook on life is completely different. Okay. And I'm not willing to
00:51:52live in the moment as much as Christina does. I believe that yes you should have
00:51:57to change yourself to be in a relationship in certain ways. But
00:52:02changing the core what you believe in and where it is you want to be in life
00:52:04that's not something I'm prepared to change because that's who makes me, me.
00:52:10Do you feel that it gave you the space to think about your situation, getting
00:52:19advice from family, Christina? I just feel like as frustrated as I am with Kieran
00:52:26and I want to bang his head against a brick wall and tell him to sort himself
00:52:30out, it's clear that there is still strong feelings there. My family they
00:52:38were like, where's Kieran? And I was like, oh my god man. I just, nobody saw it
00:52:44coming. Don't cry.
00:52:51I just love him as a person.
00:52:56In my vows all I asked is to never be judged, to be accepted for all of me, to
00:53:03be patient with me, to listen to me and I will do the same. And I've done that for
00:53:09you. Kieran, you talked about outlook on life. You can have different philosophies
00:53:16on life. You can have different views on five-year outlook or different views on
00:53:22finance. It can still work. But what will never work is a partner that has high
00:53:30emotional walls. When you have high emotional walls, you don't allow any joy
00:53:37into your life, man. The strongest act of courage is for you to drop them and be
00:53:44vulnerable.
00:53:54But I asked myself that question.
00:53:58Can I see myself and Christina being together in ten years time?
00:54:17But I asked myself that question.
00:54:22Can I see myself and Christina being together in ten years time?
00:54:31Yeah, but who does that? Well, we're in a marriage, like that's why I'm here.
00:54:35You're not guaranteed to be here ten years from now. The focus is on
00:54:41enjoying every moment that you have together. Tomorrow is not promised, but
00:54:48today is. I just don't want to see you lose someone who is phenomenal for you.
00:55:04I just don't know how much I've got left in us for the amount of emotional
00:55:08support Christina needs. Okay. That's a big deal to me. If you're talking about
00:55:16not having the capacity for emotional support, that's something different.
00:55:21I have got better. Yeah, yeah, totally you have. Even the PMDD, from when that first
00:55:28happened to now, it's the last time you had it, I was like, has it even been?
00:55:33It's here now. Is it? Is it? Is it really? Yeah. Well done you. Well done.
00:55:43As a couple, look how you've managed that. Yeah. I understand I do manage it, but it's just...
00:55:51I'm a lot. I know I am. I just want to be loved. That's all it is. I just want to be loved.
00:56:00And all I just keep thinking about is just that wedding day. Like, that is just what kills me.
00:56:10To go from that wedding to then how we are now. Every time I look at the wedding pictures,
00:56:19I literally say to him, I want that man back. I want my husband back. I want the guy that I met
00:56:28at the aisle with, with those fucking goofy teeth back.
00:56:32It's like Christine Nassir's wedding. I literally walked over to my dad and I went,
00:56:38just everything I asked for. I care about you a lot. I care about you a lot.
00:56:48The thing that I love most about you is that you are so nice and you are so kind and you are so
00:56:55I care about you a lot. I care about you a lot.
00:57:01The two of you have been on quite a journey over the last few weeks,
00:57:05and you've both tried to be very respectful and be very honest with one another.
00:57:12Should we go to the decisions?
00:57:25I know I'm not going to meet another girl like you.
00:57:30You're a fucking superstar.
00:57:34And I'm really sorry to put you in this position, Christina. It was never my intention.
00:57:38I'll always think the world of you.
00:57:45I just know that I can't give you the best version of me.
00:57:54And for that reason, I thought I'd leave.
00:57:58Thank you, Kieran.
00:58:05Christina?
00:58:09I feel I put in 110% effort from day one.
00:58:16I can't just turn my feelings off overnight. Kieran's been there for me.
00:58:21I can't just turn my feelings off overnight. Kieran knows that.
00:58:28I have been so patient and so understanding, so respectful.
00:58:34The ball's been in his court for ages.
00:58:42So...
00:58:47I'm going to leave.
00:58:49OK.
00:58:56Wow. You've both written leave,
00:58:58so, of course, this is the end of the experiment for the two of you.
00:59:05I promised myself that I wouldn't cry, so I'm not going to.
00:59:10It has been such a joy to be on this journey with you.
00:59:15The effort that you've put in has been amazing.
00:59:18I genuinely, genuinely wish you both the very best.
00:59:24And I hope that the two of you stay friends.
00:59:26Oh, absolutely.
00:59:31I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving this your all.
00:59:37And I just genuinely wish you the best for the future.
00:59:40Don't change for anyone.
00:59:41Thank you for the most magical, amazing day of my life at our wedding.
00:59:48I'm gutted, but I do only wish you the best.
00:59:53You'll be in my life, don't worry.
00:59:57Thank you, guys.
00:59:58Thank you so much. Thank you, guys.
01:00:02I'm going to miss you so much.
01:00:05I literally gave Ciaran my all and everything.
01:00:11I took this experiment so seriously.
01:00:14I genuinely thought I was going to have a husband at the end of this.
01:00:19How can I cope with this?
01:00:22I'm going to miss you so much.
01:00:25I'm going to miss you so much.
01:00:27I'm going to have a husband at the end of this.
01:00:31How can I go from being your perfect match,
01:00:34the girl of your dreams, everything,
01:00:37to then nothing?
01:00:41The end goal was to fall in love.
01:00:44Find me a forever person.
01:00:46It hasn't happened.
01:00:49Of course, I wish that things did turn out differently.
01:00:52But I have got a friend for life.
01:00:55I love Christina a bit.
01:00:57And I'll always be there for her.
01:01:01I am hopeful that I am going to find this everlasting love
01:01:04with the right person.
01:01:06I'm a lot stronger than I think.
01:01:08And I know what I deserve
01:01:11and what I want from my next partner.
01:01:19Next time...
01:01:21Definitely should have had that sandwich before I got on here.
01:01:23..the couples head off for final dates.
01:01:25Kind of suits you driving this.
01:01:28As Ross attempts to win Sasha over...
01:01:30It felt right to leave.
01:01:33I'm on to our mate.
01:01:34Happy again?
01:01:36For Polly and Adam...
01:01:37Cheers to us and to the future.
01:01:39..marital bliss is short-lived.
01:01:41I feel like you're not giving me what I want.
01:01:43Why would I sit there and go, I care about you?
01:01:45That's what you do.
01:01:46That's not what I do.
01:01:47The old Polly is slowly creeping back.
01:01:49But it's Luke falling back into old habits.
01:01:52That's actually really sexy, I'm not going to lie.
01:01:54Behave.
01:01:56This is a cooking class, not a porno.
01:01:58I've given Luke chance after chance.
01:02:00And lack of honesty...
01:02:02Can you tell me how many relationships you've had?
01:02:05..that drives Amy to despair.
01:02:07Even that number's probably inaccurate.
01:02:09What the fuck?
01:02:10Absolutely bonkers.