Sister Wives Season 9 Episode 12
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00:00Previously on Sister Wives...
00:02I came because we have this property.
00:05Mm-hmm.
00:06I'm gonna suggest to you
00:08that you protect your interest in it.
00:10Would Cody and Robin really go into this
00:13thinking, maybe we should get all of the property?
00:16Don't you think that we have each other's backs
00:18as far as that goes?
00:19Um, no. I really don't.
00:21It's just one heartbreak after another.
00:27It's just too much.
00:29Maddie and Caleb and I,
00:31we actually found a place in North Carolina.
00:33It's a big change. This is huge.
00:35This is Janelle finding land.
00:38I haven't said anything to him about North Carolina.
00:40I don't really feel like I need to share that with him.
00:42He's not gonna be part of that life.
00:44If you marry again and everything like that...
00:46Would you be the flower girl?
00:48No, I'd get a walker down the aisle.
00:52It's just different now.
00:54It's the end of an era.
00:56It didn't have to be this way.
01:00Christine's gone for sure and for good.
01:03Janelle is most likely.
01:07And it's like this is the final nail
01:10in the coffin of our dream.
01:26♪♪♪
01:36♪♪♪
01:41♪♪♪
01:51♪♪♪
02:02Oh.
02:13Thanks for being cool.
02:19Guess we can be best friends now,
02:20but you have to get in line behind him.
02:22I'm sorry, she's not taking applications.
02:24Out you go. Goodbye. See ya.
02:26This moment with Mary is me moving from the anger
02:30to just this moment of grief
02:34and just trying to be safe in it,
02:36sit in it, own it, feel it,
02:40and begin healing.
02:44Nice of you to take the emotional ex-lax.
02:47Hmm.
02:50It's more like a...
02:53permission to move on.
02:55We have divorced.
02:57We'll have a friendship, I hope.
02:59We'll get along.
03:01But this is the end of this family,
03:04right here, right now.
03:10Oh.
03:11So this teary goodbye for me
03:15didn't just confuse Mary.
03:18Nathan, I think, was confused a little bit, too,
03:20because when we get in my car and we drive off,
03:23he just touches me, he says,
03:26You know that I'm not one to push, but are you sure?
03:31I was like, brother,
03:34if you don't understand now,
03:36I don't know how I'm gonna be able to make you understand.
03:43I'm not questioning whether we're doing the right thing.
03:46I know that Mary and I can't be married.
03:49And I'm not questioning, you know, our experience,
03:53because it's great memory.
03:55It's just the end.
04:02Are you okay?
04:04That was really weird.
04:05I don't understand his emotions.
04:11What the hell, man?
04:13I am so confused.
04:15Part of me was like,
04:17Oh, s***, what have I done?
04:19Maybe I did the wrong thing.
04:24Like, it doesn't make any sense to me.
04:27That was unexpected.
04:32It's like, if you're so clear on the fact
04:35that you don't ever want to be married to me,
04:38oh, and you're also saying things like you never loved me,
04:42but you're sitting here sobbing about an end of an era
04:48and that we had something special,
04:50like, which is it?
04:54I mean, it's been a long time coming.
04:57It's been, like, eight years coming.
04:59For you.
05:00Like, I think he's been all over the place.
05:02Maybe that's why he's feeling like this.
05:05The reality hit him.
05:07I mean, it's been, well, you know.
05:10You said seven years. Sorry for the seven years.
05:12I know. Eight. It's been eight now.
05:15Yesterday would have been our 33rd anniversary.
05:23You guys moved. Here we go.
05:27So I met Mary when I lived in Vegas,
05:30and they lived in Vegas as well.
05:32I saw the family a lot for different reasons,
05:36and, you know, it always seemed like
05:41he spent the majority of his time at Robin's house.
05:44I saw it even then, and so did my husband.
05:47Like, we saw that he favored one over the others,
05:51and it sucked.
05:53You've had time to process it and to mourn it.
05:56Like, we've done this for a year.
05:58I'm still mourning it.
06:00No?
06:04That opens yourself up so much.
06:06I mean, I'm not, like...
06:08I know.
06:10It's not like I'm running back to him or anything like that.
06:12Like, that's not going to happen.
06:14It's just that...
06:18Like, is he really sad about it?
06:20Like, I do. I question. I think that's normal.
06:22Like, when you have a split, you question,
06:24wait, did I do the right thing?
06:34Go.
06:36Maybe it'd be easier if he was just mean and a jerk.
06:39It'd be so much easier if he'd be stupid.
06:42But usually he is.
06:44He really is, yeah.
06:46Maybe, yeah, I'll just plan on him being stupid again
06:49so I can, like, deal.
06:51If only he would've, like, dropped the dresser.
06:53He just needed to do something dumb.
06:55For being nice.
06:58I don't think it's any one thing that broke up the family.
07:01Things changed. Things changed so much for them.
07:04Flagstaff really divided the family.
07:06I think because physically they were farther away,
07:09it was a whole lot easier for every one of them
07:12to just go about living separate lives.
07:14And COVID really...
07:17that was the final straw.
07:21But for Mary, I think...
07:24she continued to try.
07:26She moved to Arizona to continue to try.
07:28And I think, over time,
07:31just seeing him consistently fell
07:34to follow through on his promises
07:36was her end, for her specifically.
07:40The majority of the responsibility in this case
07:43lands on the husband.
07:45He wanted to have four wives.
07:47He has to figure out how to make four relationships work.
07:50I couldn't do it.
07:52Okay, here I am.
07:54Should we start, like, getting you, like, organized?
07:56We live in the same town again.
07:57Finally!
07:58It's been so long.
08:00This town is in for it.
08:02It's gonna be busy. We're gonna be busy.
08:05It's just confusing.
08:07Like, it's really just confusing.
08:09But the thing is, I know where I am.
08:11I'm at peace with our decision
08:14to terminate the marriage.
08:18When Cody said that he plans on walking Mary down the aisle,
08:23that is definitely not happening.
08:25If anyone is walking Mary down the aisle, it's me.
08:28Not Cody.
08:30That is all.
08:41Savannah's graduating from high school,
08:43and Janelle asked me if we could actually do a party here
08:46at my house.
08:48Most of Janelle's kids are here.
08:50Most of my kids are here.
08:52I'd like a party.
08:54Throughout the years, we've always had these
08:56big graduation parties for the kids.
08:58We would all work together and throw them a big party.
09:01A lot of times, a lot of people came.
09:03So it'll be different than the other graduation parties,
09:06but we're gonna still do something
09:08to really mark the occasion.
09:10This is the only picture I have of Savannah
09:12when she was brand new.
09:13Look at how fat her cheeks were.
09:15That was really cute.
09:17I wouldn't have expected to be invited.
09:19Janelle and I aren't in a good place,
09:21and Christina and I aren't in a good place.
09:23I do not interact with Cody and Robin or their kids.
09:26Savannah doesn't really have much to do with them,
09:28so it'd be super awkward.
09:30No, I'm not gonna invite them.
09:32Do you think...
09:33They were calling him Grandpa David earlier.
09:35Who was calling him Grandpa David?
09:36Axel and Evie.
09:37Axel and Evie.
09:38They call him Grandpa Dave, and I have to go,
09:41Why do they call him Grandpa Dave?
09:42Why do they shorten it?
09:43It was Uncle Dave for a long time,
09:45and I'm like, he's not your uncle.
09:47David and I lived together for two months.
09:51He and Truly are great.
09:54Things are going really, really smooth,
09:56and it's lovely to just settle.
09:59It's just settling.
10:03So we're finally getting this property in Flagstaff paid off.
10:06It is to the wire.
10:08I think we have maybe like five days, ten days.
10:11So I don't know what Cody's doing.
10:13He's talking about gathering up all the money.
10:15I'm like, I'm just gonna wire mine.
10:17You guys do what you want,
10:18but please just make sure it's there by the freaking deadline.
10:22And now I've got to talk to Maddie and Caleb.
10:24We can finally move forward
10:25because we can buy this land in North Carolina
10:27and launch our next dream.
10:30So we have the lot that we're looking at in North Carolina.
10:33Yeah.
10:35We want to attain that one,
10:37and then you want to start looking at selling this one,
10:39or what do you want to do?
10:40I've got to still fight to bring the subdivision to fruition.
10:45Okay.
10:46And I don't know how long that's going to take.
10:48If you drive that, will it happen?
10:50Maybe.
10:52The property is a little bit complicated
10:53because even though we have these four lots,
10:56our names are not all on title for these four lots.
10:59So if we sold them now,
11:00it would be up to somebody's magnanimous generosity
11:03to be fair, right?
11:04And, like, I suspect that will happen,
11:05but I have no guarantee.
11:07So in anticipation that I may have to fight
11:10for my fair part of this property,
11:13I have retained a lawyer.
11:15Okay, and you're entitled to...
11:17Well, it's going to be the piece that we've talked about,
11:20the four acres.
11:22Of 14?
11:23That's okay, because it has to divide four ways.
11:28I don't...
11:29Whatever it's turned out, like, it was going to be four.
11:31I don't...
11:32Whatever, Maddie.
11:33At this point...
11:34That's fine.
11:35I just don't care because it's, like, I...
11:37Four acres is enough for me, for my piece,
11:40because I don't want to go toe-to-toe
11:43with whatever crazy logic they have.
11:46Fine, fair.
11:47Well, I would get...
11:48Let's push to get it subdivided
11:49so you can sell it and be done.
11:50And then you can settle with us in North Carolina.
11:53Look, Maddie's frustrated here
11:54because I don't really have any way to move forward.
11:57He's not responding when I ask him about the property.
12:00He's proposing a split that doesn't make any sense to me.
12:03I'm just trying to move it along.
12:04However, that is just so we can all get our fair share,
12:08but nothing is happening.
12:09Okay, I'm excited.
12:10It's going to be a lot of work.
12:12Maddie and I have called each other
12:13the last month and a half every day.
12:15We're like, okay.
12:16At 3 a.m., I was freaking out a little bit
12:18because it's like, oh, my gosh,
12:20it's going to be so much work, but...
12:22It is. I'm excited.
12:23Yeah.
12:24I'm so proud of you.
12:25I'm excited for you.
12:26I mean, I definitely am all in on this.
12:28I'm putting all my financial resources into this,
12:31but Maddie and Caleb are too, so we both have this dream.
12:34We're all contributing. We're all in.
12:36All of us are all in, so...
12:42That was always a big deal for us in Las Vegas.
12:44We always had a big graduation party for each kid,
12:47and that's not how it went this time.
12:51This situation sucks to high...
12:54I've got this whole other side of the family
12:56that have decided that they're still a family,
12:59and we're out.
13:10So, I am in London.
13:12I'm standing in front of Buckingham Palace.
13:16Oh, my gosh.
13:17I have never been to London before.
13:20This is seriously just kind of a defining moment.
13:24I mean, the world is my oyster.
13:26Okay, day three in London.
13:31My goodness, it has been amazing.
13:35So many good things here.
13:37So many amazing places that we've seen.
13:41Whoo!
13:43So good.
13:45Making this trip and doing it solo,
13:51I mean, it's empowering.
13:54Stonehenge, England.
14:04I literally cannot believe I'm here.
14:11Gosh, this is something that I have wanted to do
14:16for probably the majority of my life,
14:18and so actually being here right now,
14:21it's kind of blowing my mind.
14:25Stonehenge has fascinated me for years and years and years.
14:29I remember one night staying up really late
14:31watching this documentary about Stonehenge,
14:34and it made me even that much more fascinated.
14:39I am truly in awe of this place.
14:43It's like, what the heck?
14:45It's like, what the heck?
14:47You don't even know these emotions.
14:50It was really interesting,
14:51because after we made the decision to split,
14:55I feel free.
14:59Not in a way that I felt like I was being forced to stay,
15:04and I didn't feel stuck, necessarily.
15:09But it's interesting how free I feel.
15:13Okay, it is my last evening here in London.
15:18It has been an epic, an amazing, a beautiful trip.
15:23I'm very glad I came.
15:25I came at a really good time in my life, so.
15:30The official ending of my marriage to Cody,
15:34I'm very at peace with that decision.
15:39Honestly, this is just the beginning of something amazing,
15:44and I'm super excited about what is to come.
15:49I think I'm making good strides.
15:51I think this is a very good thing.
15:58Look at her smile at you.
16:02We wanted to do a flash mob for Savannah,
16:05and so I sent out this dance for everybody to do.
16:08Super easy, just learn the steps,
16:10and nobody did it.
16:12Nobody did it.
16:14So Maddie instead sent out this video,
16:16and she goes, this is what we're doing.
16:18And Maddie decided that she wanted to start it.
16:20What, what, why am I, why am I needed?
16:24This is what we're doing.
16:27Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:29Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:31Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:33Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:35Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:37Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:39Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:41Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:43Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:45Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:47Savannah's like, what the heck?
16:49Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:51Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:53Turn up the bass, turn up the bass
16:56That was it! Yay!
16:59Kind of fell, it was chaos.
17:01Yeah, it was a lot of different things
17:03that came together that didn't work.
17:06It's fine, it's fine.
17:08Did you like it?
17:10The Harlem Shake?
17:12Well, I'd like to be able to be part of Savannah's life,
17:15but it's like they're in this collusion
17:18that seems to hate Robin,
17:20and I don't know why.
17:23Other than, well, they're jealous.
17:26So Cody has this idea that somehow if he leaves Robin home,
17:29he's going to be able to come to these family gatherings,
17:32and that's so far from the truth.
17:34Cody is alienated from 90 to 95% of his children.
17:38He is not really wanted at events.
17:41He's not coming regardless of who he brings
17:44or doesn't bring with him.
17:46One, two, three.
17:49That was always a big deal for us in Los Angeles.
17:52It was always a big deal for us in Las Vegas.
17:55We always had a big graduation party for each kid,
17:58and it's just really sad that that's not how it went this time.
18:02All right, guys, let's do 3 final cheers
18:05to congratulate Savannah.
18:07Hip, hip, hooray!
18:09Hip, hip, hooray!
18:11Hip, hip, hooray!
18:13Hip, hip, hooray!
18:15The situation sucks to high...
18:18It just sucks.
18:20We've got this whole other side of the family
18:22that have decided that they're still a family,
18:25and we're out.
18:27Now, they'll let me in that club
18:29as long as I leave Robin behind.
18:31I can't do that.
18:37I've been looking forward to this for so long.
18:40We're finally paying off this property.
18:42Well, I know Janelle had come to me,
18:45and I was just like,
18:47make sure that...
18:50you protect yourself.
18:52I'm just going to say Janelle does not like Mary
18:55or care for her.
19:07So I drove back into Flagstaff today
19:10so that I could write this check for Cody
19:12so that he can take it over to the title company
19:14and we can get this property paid off.
19:16Each of us are going to be contributing
19:18to get the last part of this paid off.
19:20So it will be done.
19:22It will be paid off.
19:24It will be one less headache to have to worry about.
19:29Today will be a lot of relief, you know.
19:32I'm like, it's a happy day
19:34that we're getting Coyote Pass paid off.
19:36But there's a deep awareness
19:38that we're no longer a family.
19:41How are you?
19:43Good. How are you?
19:45Good. Happy to be doing this today.
19:48I've been looking forward to this for so long.
19:51We're finally paying off this property.
19:53That's good. That's good stuff, you know.
19:56Hey, Mary. How's it going?
19:58Good. How are you?
20:00Good. How have your travels been?
20:02So good.
20:04How is London? Go ahead and have a seat.
20:06So good. So good. So good.
20:08I've always wanted to go. Oh, my gosh.
20:10I mean, Stonehenge is a place
20:12that I've wanted to go for years, you know.
20:15I've been obsessed with it for years,
20:17so it was just awesome to be there.
20:19That is so cool. Stonehenge?
20:21There's got to be other places that were cool.
20:24That's pretty cool. I guess.
20:27I mean, I've only talked about it and obsessed about it
20:31for 25 years, you know what I mean?
20:34Like, it's just, it's interesting, you know,
20:37when you realize that something that was so meaningful
20:41that your partner really had no idea
20:44and really could care less.
20:46Remember when we used to be married?
20:49And remember when we used to, like,
20:51be interested in each other?
20:53And remember when...
20:56how I've been obsessed with Stonehenge?
20:58Should I leave? No. No.
21:02Remember when I used to be, like,
21:05really obsessed with Stonehenge and you knew this?
21:08I said you didn't have to leave.
21:10No, no, no. I'm just getting something.
21:12There's a sticky spot.
21:13Did you not know that I'm obsessed with Stonehenge
21:16and how important this was to me?
21:21I honestly have found Cody will forget things
21:24that are important to me that I've been talking about
21:27unless he's interested in it,
21:29or he can use it as somehow leverage to say,
21:32you need to do this and we can do this.
21:34You need to do this so we can go to Ireland.
21:37If you wanted to do things with Cody,
21:39you have to live in his world and do things in his world
21:42and what he was interested in
21:44and what you were interested in,
21:46eh, not so much. Not really.
21:48Oh, gosh. I'm a guy.
21:50There are certain things I'm just going to remember
21:53and there are certain things
21:54that just aren't going to matter to me,
21:57even if they do matter to you.
21:59Sometimes it's just selective memory.
22:04I'm so excited to be doing this.
22:07You excited to be doing this?
22:09So I wired, we figured out what a fourth was.
22:12I sent my fourth into the title company.
22:15So there's a huge weight that's come off my shoulder
22:17with the final payment on this property
22:19because the way the contract was written,
22:21we could have potentially lost all of it
22:23because it was all collateralized in the loan.
22:26So once this is done,
22:29then we start discussing, like,
22:33dividing it up to, like, four equal or semi-equal parcels.
22:39Yeah, and I've spoken with Janelle
22:42and because there's woods on our section,
22:46on the three lots that we've got,
22:49I said, do you want to do an appraisal
22:54or are you happy with your four acres
22:57and Mary and I splitting the other six acres?
23:01Now that Christine's out, she's given the property over to us,
23:04it's just me, Mary, Robin, and Janelle that are owners on it.
23:08So there would be Robin's four acres
23:11and then Janelle's four acres,
23:13and then Mary would have a lot, and I would have a lot,
23:16and then Mary and I share a lot.
23:18The reason I want to do this is because, you know,
23:20we get the fifth lot, the kids are able to inherit
23:22something special for themselves,
23:24but mostly it was just, like, getting all the value
23:26we could out of the land.
23:28It's just an idea.
23:30She says, I'm fine with that, I think that's fair,
23:32you guys got the woods, so it'd be three acres each, basically.
23:35I still think it would be a really wise idea.
23:37I want to know for me, because I think it's,
23:40I think it would be fair for all four of us
23:42to know really, like, what the lots are worth.
23:46I think it's fair and valid
23:50that we get an appraisal on the full property
23:53rather than just somebody guessing
23:55that, oh, well, there's trees,
23:57so it must mean that it's more valuable.
24:00Maybe it does, but wouldn't we want to know
24:03exactly how much more valuable?
24:05Because...
24:06We can do that, or, I can't remember
24:08if it was a developer or a contractor,
24:10might want to buy the entire thing,
24:12and if they bought the entire thing,
24:14then we would just split it four ways.
24:16Is that something you want to do?
24:18I know you really want that property.
24:20Yeah, so I don't know.
24:22So I'm bringing it to you as just an idea.
24:24I don't want to sell.
24:26I don't know that I want to sell.
24:28Okay.
24:29I still want to build on Coyote Pass.
24:31I hope that Mary builds a home out there.
24:33I know that she probably won't live there full-time,
24:36but where she's around and she's there,
24:38and I really hope that Janelle builds out there, too.
24:41So right now, we're kind of in this no-man's land.
24:44Like, I have a lawyer.
24:45Cody's not really talking to me about what he wants to do.
24:48He's not acting excited or enthused
24:51or even, like, wanting to move forward with this.
24:53And I would just as soon as he'd buy me out.
24:56But I just want to get this resolved and sold
24:59and split four ways.
25:01Well, I know that Janelle had come to me not,
25:04I don't know, a little while ago.
25:06I can't remember.
25:07I was just like, make sure that you protect yourself.
25:14I know that when Janelle came over to my house,
25:17she was very concerned about how it was going to go down.
25:21And having these conversations with Cody,
25:23he has explained that when we divide up the property,
25:26we're each going to have an equal part.
25:29Him, Robin, me, and Janelle
25:32will each have an equal part of the property.
25:34And I'm like...
25:35Protect yourself?
25:36Yeah, I think she was just concerned that,
25:39I don't, I don't know.
25:40I don't know.
25:41You know, even though Mary and I
25:42really don't have a real relationship,
25:44my conscience really, really dictated
25:46that I went and spoke with her about the property.
25:49I wasn't to create drama.
25:50It was just to make sure she was aware
25:53and could be educated going into the situation.
25:56She doesn't trust me because she would screw me if she could.
26:00That's what I believe.
26:01Okay, and I'll be honest.
26:03I've thought about screwing her.
26:05Okay, so I'm being honest.
26:07But I won't.
26:09My wife with a conscience won't let me.
26:12Like, just making sure that we're all covered.
26:18And in the property situation,
26:20I'm like, well, your name is on the property.
26:24Like, my name is on less property than hers.
26:27I'm only legally a third owner of one of the four parcels.
26:35So I own the least amount of property.
26:39I don't understand why the property
26:40got divided the way that it did.
26:42I was not involved in that process.
26:44I was just told about it after the fact.
26:46The names on the properties were just temporary
26:48until we paid it off.
26:50And, like, nobody made that decision except for Cody.
26:54And we were just told about it later.
26:57And I was like, why did you do it that way?
26:59And he was just like,
27:00I just had to make a decision really quickly.
27:02I was just trying to, I don't even know.
27:06I know that Cody's name is on every single property.
27:09And I know Robyn's is on, I think, three.
27:13So they own the monopoly.
27:15And I hope that they will be fair.
27:18And I hope that they will be honest.
27:20And I hope that it doesn't get ugly.
27:30I believe that Cody is resistant getting an appraisal
27:33because he knows he's making out like a bandit now.
27:37Is there a problem? I don't understand.
27:39I don't know.
27:40I don't want to put more money.
27:42I don't want to talk to lawyers about it.
27:44I'm not interested in doing anything.
27:46I'm not married to Cody anymore.
27:48I have to look out for myself.
27:59Okay, are you mailing these?
28:01I'm actually going to do a certified letter.
28:04So we're finally paying off this dang property in Flagstaff.
28:08But now there's this big fight about how do we divide it?
28:13I don't know what to expect from Cody.
28:15He's been kind of an ass about the property.
28:17So he might be an ass about it as we go move forward.
28:20Who knows?
28:21I do think that it would be fair for us to really know
28:24what before we make any decisions,
28:26before I make a decision,
28:28I think it would be fair for me to know
28:32and all of us to know what the property is worth,
28:34like different parts of it.
28:36My gosh.
28:38I mean, we have to have somebody who's a land appraiser.
28:42No, I'm sure they have those in Flagstaff.
28:45Yeah.
28:47When Mary first started saying we should get it appraised,
28:50I had no problem with it.
28:51I was like, yeah, let's make sure.
28:53I don't want to just sit here and guess.
28:55Let's make sure it's fair.
28:58Is there a problem? I don't understand.
29:00I don't know.
29:01Okay.
29:02I mean, we've got four partners that all have different goals
29:07with the property.
29:08Okay.
29:10We still need to know, don't we?
29:12Instead of just guessing.
29:14It's okay.
29:21I believe that Cody is resistant getting appraisal
29:23because he knows he's making out like a bandit now.
29:27He wants us to add trust that he knows what he's talking about
29:31with the values of the property.
29:33It's like I look out there
29:35and it's sort of a source of pain in a way,
29:37and I'm like, I don't want to put more money.
29:39I don't want to do appraisals.
29:41Maybe I have to.
29:42I don't want to talk to lawyers about it.
29:44I don't, I just, it's like, I don't know what to do.
29:48I'm not interested in doing anything.
29:51This is weird.
29:52Like, I'm having mixed emotions.
29:53Like, I keep going, wait, yay, we're paying off the property.
29:55Oh, wait.
29:57I mean, paying off the land
29:59meant the family would be back together.
30:02We were all going to build our homes out there
30:05and it just meant we were out there, all of us,
30:09that we were going to get our cul-de-sac space back.
30:12You know, we just had this really great experience
30:14and situation with the cul-de-sac in Vegas,
30:17and so now it's like, you know, that, like, what does it mean
30:22and what's it going to look like and, you know.
30:25Is Janelle thinking of building or do you even know?
30:29She's told me she's planning on,
30:31she keeps suggesting we sell it.
30:33Oh.
30:34And she keeps suggesting we sell it together.
30:36Oh, but you guys want to build out there still?
30:40Okay, I got mixed emotions on it.
30:42I, yeah, I'm definitely interested in building there.
30:46Janelle needs some healing
30:48before I'd be willing to live next to her out on Coyote Pass,
30:52so if she builds,
30:57I would probably tell Robin
31:00that we're selling.
31:01Robin might just say, like Robin does,
31:04why don't we just find a way to be good neighbors with her?
31:08You know, I have talked to Cody about building.
31:11That was a long time ago.
31:12I asked him to buy me out last winter.
31:14He said he didn't have the money.
31:15I don't know what my options are
31:17in order to preserve my part of the investment,
31:20but if I have to build out there,
31:22I don't really want to live next to them.
31:24I don't know, big fences, be a bad neighbor,
31:27maybe they'll go somewhere else.
31:28I don't know.
31:29This house has a lot of pain for me.
31:32Not because of anything between us,
31:35but because of the experience I've lived through
31:38here in this house for the past three years.
31:41Unless we sell this,
31:42we don't have the money to build there.
31:45It's, it's...
31:47I know a house for rent.
31:53If Mary built out there, hell yeah.
31:55I'm like, yeah, Mary, I'll sweep your,
31:57I'll get the snow off your driveway.
31:59I have no intention of building out on Coyote Pass.
32:04There's nothing holding me to Flagstaff,
32:06so there's no reason for me to want to build there.
32:10And that's a you thing.
32:15What do you mean?
32:16What do you mean?
32:17I don't have to be involved in that.
32:19In what?
32:21Your decision on what you guys do out there.
32:27Why is that confusing?
32:30How soon you forget.
32:36So regarding property,
32:37we're going to have to start talking about
32:39how we're going to divide it up,
32:40and I don't know how or when
32:43that conversation is going to go.
32:48I'm not married to Cody anymore.
32:50I'm not part of Cody and Robin's unit.
32:54I have to look out for myself.
32:58I talk about it like
32:59Cody's all in charge of the whole property.
33:02It's because he really has a monopoly on it.
33:04His name is on every single piece of property.
33:09If it gets to the point
33:13that I would need an attorney, I would do that.
33:16I hope that it doesn't get there.
33:18But I would do that if I need to.
33:28I'm on my way to Las Vegas to meet my brothers.
33:31It's kind of like a man trip, I guess.
33:33There is something extremely nostalgic in me
33:36about Las Vegas, but my family breaks up,
33:41and I'm going,
33:42maybe this is the way it was always supposed to be.
33:45It's like, fine, move on.
33:47Just stop blaming Robin.
34:03I'm on my way to Las Vegas to meet my brothers.
34:06Basically, it's a Christmas present
34:08that we sort of give each other.
34:10It's kind of like a man trip, I guess.
34:12We won't be doing any debauchery.
34:14We won't be gambling.
34:16The naughtiest thing we're going to do
34:18is probably swear a lot.
34:19It's sad leaving Robin and the kids at home,
34:23but I'm going to really enjoy the man trip.
34:29They used to do it a lot more in Vegas
34:32and then stop for a while.
34:34I'm glad he's going because I know
34:36that this will be healing for him.
34:41Oh, God.
34:42Waiting for Cody.
34:44He's probably doing his hair.
34:46Yeah, probably is.
34:48You're happy.
34:49You haven't got to worry about it.
34:51I don't have much.
34:53Scott's the oldest brother.
34:55Scott is in a plural marriage,
34:57and he's still very closely attached
35:00to our old church.
35:02Michael's not in plural marriage,
35:03probably won't be in plural marriage,
35:05and is no longer really, to my knowledge,
35:08affiliated with our old church.
35:11Everybody always wants to give me crap about my hair,
35:14but I have to do a lot of work
35:16to take care of this hair.
35:18Wow.
35:19Listen, if I don't dry it right,
35:21the curls don't happen.
35:23Cody, you know he's a pretty teenager.
35:26His hair.
35:27His hair has always been important to him.
35:29Don't be jealous.
35:30We're not.
35:31It's a lot of work.
35:32The grayer I get, it's all colored.
35:34You know, I just, I need it to be pretty,
35:37and then the hair net helps the curls.
35:39You know, if I don't want to spend the entire time
35:41blow drying, it's a little cheesy,
35:44but it works.
35:46All right, let's get out of here.
35:47Whoa, whoa, where are we going?
35:48We're going to where we used to live,
35:50the old cul-de-sac.
35:51There is something extremely nostalgic in me
35:55and about Las Vegas,
35:57because personally I feel like Las Vegas
35:59was the one place in my life I felt safe.
36:02Cheers.
36:03Cheers.
36:04We were accepted, we were tolerated,
36:05we made friends in Las Vegas.
36:07We had our family together in a cul-de-sac.
36:09We had this amazing experience in Las Vegas.
36:14And so I want to go to see the cul-de-sac
36:17because this is nostalgia for me.
36:20This is a special place.
36:24Man, it's so bizarre being back here.
36:29Such good memories.
36:30Dude.
36:31Good times.
36:32So many memories.
36:33It's almost heartbreaking.
36:38We did our recommitment celebration.
36:41We did our family mission statement.
36:43We did that all living in the cul-de-sac.
36:48It was the closest thing I ever had to the dream.
36:51And I don't know if I ever did plural marriage correctly, ever.
36:55But this was the place where it was beautiful.
37:00At least as beautiful as my experience ever had it.
37:04And I tend to remember the best parts of things,
37:07and so I loved this place.
37:10So you're...
37:11They've done some more landscaping.
37:13Your house is more down at that end, right?
37:15Yeah, yeah.
37:16I came by once a year ago
37:18and hit a point where I was just weeping
37:23out of, I don't know, nostalgia or some feeling of loss.
37:29You know, this is, of course, after Christine's left
37:31and after my problems with Janelle.
37:33And Mary's problems started while we were here.
37:37But it was just like my memory still has us together
37:41in this space, and it's a relatively warm memory for me.
37:47Is there any hope to reconcile with Janelle?
37:51I keep asking Janelle to reconcile with me.
37:53I keep asking her.
37:54She just says, no, I enjoy my life without you.
37:58I didn't know I was that big a pain in the butt.
38:01But she's free, and I'm insulted by her expressions,
38:06like her just being, I'm done, I don't want it.
38:09But I'll be honest with you.
38:11It's really easy to sit here and be in a place with Robin
38:16and that intimacy and that safety and that wholeness
38:21and that divine relationship
38:24and not worry about the others.
38:28And it's liberating.
38:30I was building a family.
38:32It wasn't whether I was in love.
38:34I loved them.
38:35Was I in love with them?
38:37Did I have the same experience with each one?
38:40No, never.
38:41That's a hard confession to make when I was working really hard
38:45to hide what Robin and I had
38:48while I'm trying to promote everything else.
38:53The problem that I'm struggling with is Christine and Janelle
38:57are both like, hey, listen.
38:59Let's just move on, you know, kind of thing.
39:01But then they trash-talk me behind my back.
39:06I'm bugged to no end by that.
39:09It's like, fine, move on.
39:11Just stop blaming Robin.
39:15Right.
39:16There's a little fault that I have,
39:18and it's not a fault with a big family,
39:20but it's a fault when I'm a monogamist, okay?
39:23I'm still trying to partner with Janelle,
39:27who has rejected our marriage and our partnership.
39:30And Mary calls me, and I answer the phone, and I jump.
39:33Hey, I got to go see Mary.
39:34That's been a weird space.
39:36I've been trying to work with these women.
39:38I've been working so hard to get them to agree.
39:42I'm still trying to do it.
39:43And the real point is,
39:45Robin's the only woman I have to get to agree with me now.
39:49So now I'm essentially a monogamist.
39:53And I'm...
39:56It's a different world, because it's not this big thing.
39:59There's not all this energy behind it.
40:02But I do feel like it's right for me.
40:07So my family breaks up,
40:11and I'm going, maybe this is the way it was always supposed to be.
40:16And that's hard to say when you've got all the children
40:19and all the experience and all the memories,
40:22but yet I don't know what else to do besides say,
40:24this is what's happening, so this is where we're at.
40:27And so you'll never take on another wife?
40:30I never want to marry again.
40:32Never again.
40:33So I'm very happy with the idea of just growing old together with Robin.
40:41In fact, it sounds romantic.
40:45Riding off into the sunset with Robin.
40:48There you go.
40:51I've just been through three divorces.
40:53I shuddered at the idea of marrying again.
40:58The pain that it put me through, the pain that it put Robin through.
41:01I'm not interested in this right now.
41:03It's just been a really difficult three years.
41:08All right, I want to just get one last look here.
41:12And it's almost heartbreaking.
41:17That's just the way it is? All right.
41:19Let's get out of here, ma'am.
41:21I would never want to do polygamy again.
41:23The realization I've had since I talked to my brothers
41:26was that polygamy kills emotional intimacy.
41:30It makes everybody defensive.
41:32And I really want an emotionally vulnerable, intimate relationship with a woman,
41:38and you're not going to get that in polygamy.
41:46Next time on Sister Wives.
41:48I'm going to get a wedding dress.
41:50Oh, my gosh, I'm so excited.
41:57Her first wedding dress was not sexy, not elegant, and did not fit her well.
42:03I want to start dating guys who kind of believe the same thing
42:08and have the same, like, life goal as me.
42:11I know that they're interested in dating, but I'm like,
42:14hey, that's not, shouldn't be the reason why you're at a church.
42:18Ever since he has married Robin, he has wanted nobody else or you.
42:25I think that there is a way that Cody and I could have figured out
42:28our relationship and our marriage.