90 Day - The Last Resort S2 Episode 7 - If You're Not First, You're Last
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00:00Are you guys feeling hungover today?
00:02Can you die from a hangover?
00:04I don't feel very good, honestly.
00:06Previously on 90 Day, The Last Resort.
00:09Florian, that freaking Florian,
00:11I don't want to see that dude today.
00:13He's a dick.
00:14So, do we think that they're talking
00:16s*** about us and the other man?
00:17Yes. Yes, definitely.
00:19It's really not easy to just
00:21forgive and forget so quickly.
00:25Today's activity, we're gonna be talking about control
00:28and the power dynamic.
00:30Within your couple, you either are gonna be
00:33a rower or a thrower.
00:36I'm gonna throw, Natalie's gonna row.
00:39You have to stay in your role.
00:41You cannot switch roles.
00:43I'm hoping this kayak challenge
00:44will really show the teamwork
00:46and ultimately some great communication skills
00:48between the couples.
00:50The competition has begun.
00:52Woo!
00:53Come on!
00:54Woo!
00:55Woo!
00:59Definitely cheated,
01:00because they changed who was rowing and who was shooting.
01:03Before even the game started, they cheated.
01:07Also, this is like a therapy process.
01:09I feel like for them to cheat during this
01:11shows their character, honestly.
01:13Disqualified!
01:15Disqualified!
01:17Disqualified!
01:18Disqualified!
01:19Disqualified!
01:21You are cheating, and it's not fair, and we won.
01:23Even though you guys came in the fastest...
01:26We sure did.
01:27Julia and Brandon, you guys actually won
01:30a night in the honeymoon suite of the resort.
01:33Oh!
01:35Woo!
01:37Do we comprehend the reality of,
01:39I'm behind her rowing, but she feels like
01:41she's doing everything?
01:43She's lazy.
01:46No!
01:49So can you stop laughing?
01:51Like, everyone's trying to be vulnerable here.
01:53Can you have some respect, please?
01:56It's not about you right now!
02:15It's not about you right now!
02:17It's not about you right now!
02:19It's not about you right now!
02:21It's not about you right now!
02:23It's not about you right now!
02:25It's not about you right now!
02:27It's not about you right now!
02:29It's not about you right now!
02:31It's not about you right now!
02:33It's not about you right now!
02:35It's not about you right now!
02:37It's not about you right now!
02:39It's not about you right now!
02:41It's not about you right now!
02:43It's not about you right now!
02:45It's not about you right now!
02:47It's not about you right now!
02:49It's not about you right now!
02:53It's not about you right now!
02:58Done! I mean, too much!
03:00Now it's about us, dear.
03:02Yeah, it's about us here,
03:06I mean, it's about everybody about you.
03:10It's about all of us, not only you.
03:13Can I speak?
03:19Go for it.
03:20Let's hear it.
03:20Like, when we were disqualified,
03:22everybody attacked our couple.
03:24And it felt like really wrong.
03:26And I have nothing against people.
03:27You have no respect for therapy, bro.
03:30Like, they all talk.
03:31Did I interrupt?
03:31Yes, you laughed while I spoke.
03:33Every time I, you're like, ha, ha, like a child.
03:35It's disrespectful.
03:36OK.
03:38It's OK.
03:39I take it.
03:40Josh, what's, what's, what's going through your mind now?
03:43What's happening?
03:45Um, I think we made really good progress today.
03:49And, you know, I think that Natalie
03:51felt attacked by everybody.
03:53And so, you know, I'm, you know, getting her back.
04:00I think you guys, yeah, you're really
04:01demonstrating strong, something strong between the two of you.
04:04I appreciate you guys doing that.
04:10I can definitely see that Natalie
04:11has got it out for Sophie.
04:13Even before Josh side of it, I think
04:15that Natalie has a personal problem with girls like Sophie.
04:19Trying to assess it, I think Natalie is just mad that Sophie
04:23is the young, pretty girl.
04:25Natalie definitely has mean girl energy.
04:27I feel like I've dealt with girls like her in school.
04:30I won't let someone like her try and put me down.
04:32Because I don't with mean girls.
04:35I really don't like them.
04:36And I feel like if you're, you know,
04:38trying to put another woman down, I just don't like you.
04:43OK.
04:44And next, Brandon and Julia, how was it for you guys?
04:48Well, teamwork.
04:50That's something I think we showed today.
04:54You know, how do you think I did at first?
05:03Then what happened?
05:04You started doing this without my help.
05:07Mm-hmm.
05:08And then when I ran out of steam,
05:10you did everything you could to help me.
05:13And I saw something really good today.
05:14I think that we could apply this to us having kids.
05:23So you said you think I'm not going to help you with them.
05:25But I think you and I are going to work as a team.
05:29And I think we're going to do amazing.
05:35I feel this anxiety now so bad.
05:38And I feel my heart just, like, like...
05:42Just take some deep breaths.
05:44Can you talk on about what that means?
05:47This is such a painful.
05:52It's... I don't know how to explain.
05:54But...
05:56So when I say, like, I don't want kids,
06:01and when I say I don't want because I'm so scared
06:05to be in reality...
06:11So I can't have kids.
06:14Oh!
06:15What?
06:26So...
06:28we don't know that 100...
06:55Yeah, absolutely.
07:25I'm not sure I won't going to hear that again.
07:28People get different opinions from doctors all the time.
07:30I just worry that this could be our...
07:32broke our relationship.
07:34I think I've kind of expressed it before,
07:37but this is something I want.
07:39I have to have.
07:43This is one of those things where we hit a rock,
07:46but we can work together, and we can get around this.
07:49But they'll be going to doctor if doctor say no.
07:52That could be the possibility.
07:54No, no, no, no, no, no.
07:56No, and absolutely not.
08:05You know...
08:08I'm never going to go anywhere, Julia.
08:15I know, but we're going to...
08:17It's just, again, it's the same thing.
08:19It's another rock, and we might hit it,
08:20but we're going to get around that too.
08:23There's other methods out there.
08:25What if? What if?
08:27We're going to stop with the what if.
08:29Because we don't have answers to those yet.
08:31Yeah.
08:32All I hear is Brandon saying,
08:34I got you physically and emotionally.
08:36I'll be here for you.
08:38I appreciate you sharing with the group.
08:41Julia, listen, I really admire you
08:44and what you did, like, opening your heart to us.
08:47It's like one big step for you to feel relief.
08:51And one thing is for certain, mark my words,
08:54one way or the other, you're going to be an amazing mom.
09:01When many couples get married,
09:03the idea for many of them would be to have children.
09:07To find out that you're not able to
09:09or there's a medical condition there,
09:11you know, that can really affect the relationship.
09:13But watching Julia was such a powerful moment.
09:17I think it was a breakthrough for them as a couple
09:20and a lot of emotions for her to sit with.
09:23Ari and Binny, I know we've talked,
09:26we've had conversations about control.
09:28I think this was a good exercise
09:30for the two of you to start with today.
09:32One of the things that we did discuss
09:34was passwords for social media.
09:37Where are we at with that today, Ari?
09:40Well, Binny was saying that
09:42until I gave you your social media password
09:44that you wouldn't participate in any therapy
09:46or even speak to me.
09:47But anyways, since this is so important to you
09:50to have these passwords,
09:54I want to give you this and I wrote it down for you
09:57and here it is.
09:59So I hope that you'll now participate in the therapy.
10:04Okay, thanks so much.
10:09I think handing over his passwords for the first time,
10:12that's a big step, I think, to the right direction.
10:15I don't know.
10:16I can at this point tell that their marriage is very broken.
10:22I don't see how they can make things work.
10:26But it's not impossible.
10:28Maybe they can pull off a miracle
10:31and work out their relationship.
10:33Who knows what can happen.
10:38Binny, you did say to Ari that if you did get these back
10:42that you would be willing to have that hard conversation.
10:45And I think now is the time after the group setting
10:49to get some of these things out.
10:51Yeah.
10:54Finally she gave it to me.
10:56I'm happy.
10:58Of course I'm happy.
10:59Now I feel like she respects me.
11:02I feel like she'll move on
11:03and then I feel like she will be maybe excited
11:07for fixing the situation.
11:10Thank you for everyone for participating.
11:12We appreciate all of you.
11:14You're sharing.
11:15You're being vulnerable.
11:16You're trusting in the process.
11:18We're hoping that we can really push through
11:20and do some more work
11:21so we can all make it to the recommitment ceremony.
11:27Yes!
11:28You get your passport.
11:30Don't worry about it.
11:33Okay, let's go.
11:39Open Sesame!
11:40Open Sesame!
11:45You got my bag?
11:46Yeah.
11:50Natalie, she's just a bully, honestly.
11:52I don't like her at all.
11:53Is she laughing all the time when you guys are talking?
11:56She's just judging everyone and laughing at everyone.
11:59And like, it's just unnecessary.
12:02And it's annoying me because it feels like...
12:04She's laughing at your problem, right?
12:06Yeah, and it makes it hard for me to open up
12:08when someone's laughing at me.
12:09And I don't really think that's fair
12:11because now I don't feel comfortable
12:13conveying my real emotions
12:15when someone's laughing at everything I'm saying.
12:22I was thinking,
12:23maybe we go to a restaurant,
12:25get some food and some drinks.
12:27Ooh, that is a good idea.
12:29I could text the other car.
12:31Text Jasmine.
12:33Stacy texted me.
12:35Are you okay with stopping to have some drinks?
12:38They need something?
12:39Yes, let's do some eating.
12:41Did you reply to her? Like, yes.
12:46So how do you feel after your session, Ari and Benny?
12:49Aw, she's laying on him.
12:51Cozy, cozy.
12:52This is the first time I've really seen you guys
12:54snuggle and cuddle.
12:56You know, you guys hit some major milestones today.
12:59The freedom that you gave Benny.
13:02You guys both kind of progressed together.
13:08I did what you asked, so at least you can be nice, okay?
13:33Please try not to embarrass me in the bar.
13:38Okay.
13:40Pitching Coast Saloon.
13:43Wow, I feel like I'm in a Western movie.
13:49Okay, so let's go.
14:01That's what I'm talking about.
14:03Like, just tonight, just spend some time with me.
14:05Can you do that for me?
14:15You're just gonna explore your partner's body
14:17for things that feel good.
14:19And then we mark an X with one of these flavored syrups.
14:22Josh, now you are the person that we are going to explore,
14:25and we have limited...
14:26Can you take off your shirt?
14:27No.
14:28I do not like PDA.
14:30I don't like it at all.
14:32The guy who feels so sure about sex life,
14:36he's like, no, I don't want to do it.
14:38I don't like sticky stuff.
14:40I'm sorry, you can't change my mind if I don't like it.
14:42I don't like it.
14:43Stop insulting me.
15:02Okay, let's go.
15:03All right.
15:04Let's go, let's go.
15:11Oh, camel, you see camels here.
15:14They are in this desert.
15:16How about the...
15:19Nice place.
15:21Oh, wow.
15:22That's badass.
15:25That's a real baby bear.
15:28So after a fun day on the water kayaking
15:32and a awkward therapy session,
15:35now we're going to go out.
15:37But our track record so far has not been too good
15:41when it comes to being at bars,
15:43so I'm hoping nothing's going to go crazy,
15:46people are going to be all right,
15:48people can drink and not come for each other.
15:51We'll see, we'll see.
15:53Can I get a Jack and Coke?
15:55Can I get two double tequila pineapple juices?
15:59Sure.
16:01Do you do old-fashioned here?
16:03I don't have all this stuff.
16:05No?
16:06You do a mojito?
16:08Mojito?
16:09No.
16:10Manhattan?
16:11No.
16:13Y'all are some typical-ass city slicks
16:16walking in here with some of these fancy-ass drinks.
16:20That's so f***ing silly.
16:23That's so f***ing silly.
16:25Feel free to grab a seat wherever you'd like.
16:27Okay, thank you.
16:32You want a rib-eye?
16:34You want a rib-eye?
16:36Do you know?
16:37No.
16:38Yo.
16:39How do you know?
16:40We're just sitting here.
16:42Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:44No, no, no.
16:47You stay here.
16:49What?
16:50Listen to your wife.
16:53I'm really exhausted after today's therapy session,
16:57and honestly, I don't feel like dealing with Gino and Florian's
17:00drunken antics tonight.
17:03I'm starting to think that Gino is looking at this retreat
17:06as a vacation with the boys,
17:09and he's not taking care of the real issues for us.
17:12I'm like, hello?
17:15What about your wife?
17:16Do you have any plans for us?
17:19Apparently not.
17:23Can we go talk for a minute?
17:25You want to talk for a minute?
17:27Okay, let's go.
17:34Have fun.
17:38Where are they going?
17:40Trying to figure things out.
17:42So is that a good thing, or is that?
17:44That's a good thing.
17:45He got his passwords back.
17:46Seems like there's something happening now.
17:48Hello.
17:49Is there someone to see?
17:52I think so.
17:55Now that I've given Vinny his passwords back,
17:58I'm hoping that he can stop using as a roadblock.
18:01I want to give him a real chance to come clean
18:04about this infidelity just with me
18:09and not in a group therapy setting,
18:11not with the therapist, just one-on-one.
18:13And Vinny was receptive to talking before.
18:18Maybe this is the moment, and if it is the moment,
18:20I don't want to pass it up.
18:34I gave you the passwords.
18:35You asked me, and you said you would tell the truth.
18:38Yes, I'm happy you want to talk to me
18:41about me and your situation.
18:44I'd love to work on it.
18:47No, it just, it breaks my heart that, like,
18:50we've been together for five years,
18:52and I sacrificed a lot to be with you.
18:56I know, I know.
18:57And I, even though I shouldn't have done it,
19:00I opened my whole heart to you.
19:03And the thing is that in exchange for everything
19:06I've done for you, you've betrayed me again and again.
19:09I'm not going to hurt you.
19:12You know that you've hurt me so bad over the years.
19:15And I just want you to admit that what you've done
19:18has really hurt me and destroyed me.
19:22If you could just say the truth, just once.
19:30Are you going to really say that you didn't cheat on me
19:33in the beginning of our relationship with that girl,
19:35that you did not have sex with her,
19:36that you did not move her into my home when I was in the US?
19:41No, I didn't.
19:46No.
19:49Obviously, I'm really upset about the present infidelity,
19:53but I feel like it might be easier for Vinny
19:56to talk about something that happened in the past
19:58rather than something that's happened recently.
20:01And so I want to talk about the past.
20:03I believe that he cheated when I was pregnant with Avi.
20:06It's not really about the timeline or who it was with.
20:10It's more just about,
20:11if he doesn't acknowledge the past mistakes,
20:13then we can't move on until we fix it.
20:15But of course, the second that I bring it up,
20:17the denials and the excuses start all over again.
20:43But I have a video of her laying in my bed, in my house.
20:59And you are there.
21:05But you have a made-up story.
21:07So now it's my turn to talk.
21:10No, no, no, I didn't finish.
21:12I have one more thing to say.
21:14You lied to me, and you had a relationship with her.
21:19I'm telling the truth for the first time.
21:22I can't keep it inside anymore.
21:26I came to tell the truth.
21:28I thought we would come and you would tell the truth.
21:32I don't swear on my son's life, not like you.
21:39I don't swear on my son's life, not like you.
21:54Benny, Benny!
21:57Hello!
21:59Where is your wife?
22:00No, she's outside.
22:01Outside?
22:02Yeah.
22:03Okay, I'm gonna check on her.
22:04Stacy, let's go!
22:10Oh, there she is.
22:13Hey!
22:14How are you, girl?
22:15What happened?
22:17I just confronted Benny about one of the times he cheated on me.
22:20And so what he did was he just went,
22:22**** you.
22:23And then he just walked out.
22:27Wow.
22:28And I came to therapy so that the therapist could hold him accountable.
22:31But I realize now nobody can hold him accountable because he won't tell the truth.
22:35So what does that mean?
22:36Is he done?
22:37Are you guys gonna finish the therapy?
22:39What am I supposed to do?
22:41How can we move forward if he won't tell the truth?
22:45How's it going, man?
22:58Oh, he's going back to the past.
23:08Why not?
23:10But in order for this to work, you have to go move forward from right now.
23:13You have to, like, we have to...
23:15You know what I'm saying?
23:16If you have a problem, like, if you have a problem...
23:18Let's move on.
23:19Oh, she don't want to move on.
23:20She don't want to move on.
23:26You don't think so?
23:28Yeah.
23:36She doesn't know that you're here under the pretenses of trying to understand...
23:40Like, maybe work out things.
23:58Yeah.
24:19If you're here and you're trying, that's all you can do.
24:23Yeah, I know.
24:25I tell her, look, me and you, even if you're working, if you're not working,
24:28I'm not your enemy, I'm your...
24:30Remember every time, I'm your father's son.
24:32You're working if you're not working.
24:34That's what I'm saying.
24:35Let's go move forward.
24:36I know, just like...
24:38She's the best.
24:39Hopefully you work it out.
24:40I was, I was working on this.
24:41Just be happy, man.
24:42I want you to be happy.
24:43I want to be happy.
24:48Jasmine, go show him.
24:49Show him some moves.
24:52You're a teacher, right?
24:53Uh-huh.
24:54What?
24:55What am I doing?
24:56No, no, no.
24:57Like, one, two, three.
24:59Wait.
25:00One, two, three.
25:01Huh?
25:02One, two, three.
25:03Huh?
25:04Am I doing it right?
25:06Oh!
25:10Jump!
25:11Oh!
25:13No!
25:14Oh!
25:15One more drink!
25:17How?
25:18Baby, stop.
25:19Get out of here.
25:24Oh!
25:25Oh!
25:26Oh!
25:27Oh!
25:28Oh!
25:29Oh!
25:30Oh!
25:31Oh!
25:40I feel like a lot of the couples were probably not going to make it.
25:43I know.
25:45Ari and Vinny, it's like, he said, she said.
25:50He was crying, he was emotional.
25:52Yeah, are you ready to open up because we're gonna have to open up a lot today a hell of a lot
26:22I
26:39Feel so exhausted after yesterday physically and emotionally
26:43Especially me because selling in the front of every group. I can have a baby. It's very scared to be some horrible
26:49I can't even cry in front of my parents and I'm just crying like a baby in a front of stranger people to me
27:00Actually, I call my mom this morning I
27:05Tell her about I went to doctor in Russia and what did your mom say?
27:11she agreed with you because
27:15We need to go into second opinion here
27:17So I know it's gonna be tough
27:19I know it's gonna be hard, but I give you one compromise we can try we can go into this doctor
27:30This is therapy actually I feel like that's a great place for our couple
27:35Because we actually trying to work. Yeah, and actually I'm so glad so real
27:42Emotion. Mm-hmm. I'm glad to start behaving
27:47For Brandon, it's very important to have a child and I'm a little scared because I worry Brandon gonna leave me if doctors say
27:54I mostly doesn't have a kids. That's not what he want for his life
27:59It's true. It's what I want, but I would not leave Julia over this. I
28:04realized that this is
28:07upsetting for Julia
28:08But she needs to understand that, you know, no matter what I love her. I will support her and
28:15I'm not going anywhere. I
28:19Think we both agree we want to try and make this work. Okay, let's try
28:38It must be our sex therapist, are you ready? I'm ready
28:43Hi
28:48Hey
28:49How's it going? Hey. Hey Josh. How are you? Hey, we are going to have our first
28:56Therapy together and it's gonna be sex therapy. Oh
29:01I'm excited
29:04Like a child before Christmas Wow
29:12I want my sex therapy
29:16What'd you bring oh, I've got lots of lots of things for us to try and play around with today
29:23Let's see. I've got some brushes. Oh, we were gonna paint. Oh, yeah
29:29I'm I actually know about art a lot. I like impressionism
29:34Do you know impressionism? Oh wow food
29:38That's looks like a lot of sugar
29:41So one of the activities that I did with the group when we had our session was called couples pleasure mapping and
29:48We used these paintbrushes and you're just gonna explore your partner's body for things that feel good, right?
29:54So once you get to a point on your partner's body that feels good
29:58They're gonna say green light and then we mark an X with one of these flavored syrups on your partner's body
30:04That feels good, right?
30:06Okay, so who wants to go first?
30:09Hmm
30:10Well, I don't really want to put that on my body
30:13Josh
30:15We're gonna lick it off. I just don't like messy like to be like syrups on my body and stuff
30:20It's just not natural. Like I'm good natural. Like we have natural affection natural intimacy and all of it and like
30:29That's never been our problem. So what I hear you saying is the it's not the sex
30:33It's not the pleasure. That is the issue
30:36But I still want to know like how comfortable are you guys being vulnerable with each other because sex is more than just about pleasure
30:43It's very much about intimacy and being vulnerable and feeling naked in front of each other, please
30:49It's a nice game, please. Please for me, please Josh. I want to do it. Yes. Okay, please man. Okay
31:04Okay, I'm ready though, all right, here we go
31:14Right there, okay
31:16We're gonna mark an X right there. That was a green light good enough. Yeah with yours with this. Yeah. Okay. Here you go. I
31:24Mean my idea of sexy has nowhere in there
31:29Painting chocolate on people's bodies just doesn't I know
31:34Where Natalie's pleasure spots are like I know what I'm doing
31:37But she wants to do the exercise. So I'm going to do it as much as I don't like it. I'm gonna try for her
31:51Now Josh it's time to remove them. Okay. No look it you I'm going to remove it
31:59Watch close your eyes
32:09Why but didn't kiss this I wanted to kiss me
32:15Why don't want to remove?
32:18Your lips, I just don't want to lick the syrup
32:21Okay next time for people like him sugar-free. Okay. Yes. Yes. I will keep that in mind sugar-free
32:28next time
32:30Josh now you are the person that we are going to explore and we have limited a coffee. Sure. No, I
32:40Do not like PDA, okay, I don't like it at all. What's PDA for you? Like I don't like
32:47Public displays of affection. I like to have my moments with her like in in private
32:53I just don't like to you know, I'm just not I still like it
32:56Yeah, I get it when we did this with the group. There were
33:00I'm sorry. I mean can't change my mind if I don't like it. I don't like it
33:04Yeah, right. I'm gonna be like taking like my clothes. You don't have to take your clothes off
33:09I'm not asking you to do that. Okay, it's hard. Yeah, it is it is
33:13I like to meet people where they are with Natalie and Josh. I see a
33:18disconnect between them
33:20Emotionally that I wouldn't be surprised if it's bleeding into their physical intimacy. I
33:26Didn't know you would be so I like what it just look we do not have problems. Well, it's not about that
33:32It feels like listen, I know but I
33:37Well, it's not it's
33:40The guy who thinks that he's so confident and who feels so sure about sex life
33:47He reacts like a kid. He's like, no, I don't want to do it. I don't like sticky stuff
33:52I don't like this. I don't like that and I'm like, wow, I never expected this reaction from Josh
33:59What if I like this kind of games well, what if it makes me feel good
34:06It's sure I don't yeah, but what you don't what you don't it's a fruit
34:12Stop insulting me
34:14I
34:30Love him, but I crave for
34:33Sex, you know, I'm convinced now that the only possible solution to save our marriage is to open it up to someone
34:41else
34:45You
34:58Let's pretend I'm not in the room if I wasn't here, where would you want Natalie to lick the syrup off of you?
35:06I
35:08Mean
35:11If you weren't here
35:14Right, I would be a little bit more free to explore with just her. Okay. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you what I'm gonna leave
35:21I'm gonna give you guys a few minutes just to explore and I want to know like how comfortable are you guys being vulnerable with?
35:28Each other. I don't think we have any issues
35:31And I I'm just I'm just being honest. Okay, can we do the exercise?
35:37Please please man, I'll be back. Okay. All right. Bye
35:42Okay, I
35:44Was good at painting were you
36:07I
36:12Read nice wines guy
36:28You tickle me don't tickle me
36:37You're tickling
36:44That's how you go to the ball
36:47Oh
37:05No, I don't want you right now just to please me no, I heard you
37:16No
37:22Kiss me. No, I don't want you right now at this moment. Kiss me not at this moment later
37:42Just leave me alone when I ask pretty simple
37:47I'm not looking to have a make-out session or anything
37:51I'm not looking to do that right now to the affection like that, you know, but I'm not even talking about sex
37:57That is a problem. I'm not even talking about sex. Yeah, it's the problem. I'll give you an idea where I am
38:03Like yes, where are you at? I need to understand where I just want to try to build our friendship up
38:08So you want us to be friends? No. No, I want us to build a foundation. That's what you're married
38:14We do not have a foundation
38:19Because at one time we did
38:44You ask yourself why I left home for three days I am like
38:51very hurt person
38:59And have a friendship and a good connection that's what I need first
39:03What about what I need and I am gonna go at my pace. I don't care about
39:07About my pace because it's me that matters. I'll make the decision. I didn't ask you for sex. I just asked you for a kiss.
39:15But you keep asking and asking and asking. You keep wanting to go more and more.
39:19How do you feel like? It hurts me. You don't even want to kiss me. You don't even want to hug me.
39:28And you are losing me too. You're losing me. Well, you already lost me.
39:38Every day I have to hear the same speech.
39:41Stop touching me. Stop kissing me. Stop hugging me and that really hurts.
39:47I love him, but I crave for sex, you know.
39:52I'm convinced now that the only possible solution to save our marriage is to open it up to someone else.
40:00My gosh, it really makes me emotional.
40:04I really came here because I want things to work.
40:08Because you are not gonna ever blame me and say that I didn't make my best to make things work, you know.
40:33So, okay. Strawberry or chocolate? I really don't want the syrup on. Let me try it, I'll tell you.
40:45Wait. Wait, I'll let you. Okay, here we go.
40:49Josh! Please! That's not gonna work. That's not gonna work. Sit. Sit. I want to do it.
40:54First impressions of Natalie are that she's super free and really excited to explore what their physical connection looks like.
41:04All right, let's do... Fine. Let's just do the chocolate, I guess.
41:11Josh, on the other hand, he seems a bit disconnected.
41:15I believe them when they say they have a great sex life, but I don't believe them when they say it doesn't need any fixes.
41:21I'm enjoying it so bad. God, for me it's a good time.
41:24I feel like you're doing more than a check mark. That's a huge thought.
41:27I told you, whatever work I do, I 100% do it.
41:34Come on!
41:36Sounds like it's going pretty well.
41:47Good.
41:50Give me five.
41:52Nice job.
41:53Great team! Done!
41:58We did it! Yeah!
42:01We completed the exercise. Come on, this is good. You see, we can move to the next level.
42:07He's coming.
42:08Where's Josh?
42:09Yeah, he went to the bathroom.
42:11Oh, okay.
42:13I didn't know that Josh could be so sensitive when it comes to these moments because our sexual life, usually he's not that shy.
42:21Well, talking about sex can be really, really vulnerable for people and it can make them put up walls where there weren't any before.
42:31Oh, hey. Hello there.
42:33Sorry about that.
42:34No worries.
42:37Did you enjoy it? Did you find any new erogenous zones?
42:41I heard some giggling.
42:42Yeah, I think we had fun with it, but I'm going to be honest, I didn't like it.
42:46Okay.
42:47Yeah, I don't like the stuff on my body, but I did it for her.
42:52I do have a question.
42:54Yeah, sure.
42:55One of our things that we do struggle with is when we are intimate, the next day is usually not the best.
43:07Okay.
43:09So, I feel like it's maybe, like, more things are expected of me.
43:15Like what?
43:19Like, you know, she wants a lot more of, like, me and my time, stay here, like, let's go have breakfast, let's do this.
43:26But, like, my time is, like, methodically thought out.
43:29You know, I have a call at 10, 15 meetings, and so I do not like that disturbed.
43:35Why?
43:37Because that is, like, my livelihood.
43:40I also have a seven-year-old daughter and my son, he was in a tragic accident.
43:46Why can't I be a part of it? Why can't I help you? Why?
43:49I don't understand what is the problem of being together and doing things together.
43:54Because I don't want to be forever, like, a girlfriend.
43:59How can we build relationship and family if you don't have time?
44:03How it's going to be? How my life going to be?
44:06I want family.
44:07I've not agreed to have a family.
44:09And you knew it.
44:10What do you mean you not agree? You said we're going to work on it.
44:12I've never agreed to have a family with you.
44:42Okay, I think we're getting a little out of hand here.
45:03Yeah, that's not, that's not the answer.
45:07That's not the answer.
45:12What do you want to hear?
45:15I think that's why we're here, trying to figure it out.
45:20Natalie, Natalie, I think we're going to take a breather. I think we need to take a step back.
45:26Josh.
45:27Yes.
45:29What brings you here? Why are you here?
45:31Yeah, why are you here?
45:32I'm here to see if we can have a normal relationship.
45:37Okay.
45:38But I'm hoping that, like, being here is, like, going to calm some of this lashing out at everybody.
45:44Like, I need that to be fixed.
45:46If that is not fixed, there's no relationship.
45:50A hundred percent.
45:51Because I can't bring that around my family.
45:53I can't bring that into my home.
45:56I can't.
45:58Okay, Josh.
45:59Yeah.
46:00It seems like we've kind of come to the root of a problem that is kind of impacting your intimacy.
46:05Right.
46:06Because he doesn't want to be committed to me. He's not committed.
46:08It's not that I don't want to, Natalie. I cannot give you, like, that extra time.
46:12Maybe just you take knife and kill me. That's it. I will die.
46:15A normal man would not make me feel insecure.
46:18He just wants to insult me, say that I'm not good enough. It's not true.
46:22And every time when he insults me, it goes like this.
46:25All the time. I can't anymore.
46:27I did not insult you.
46:28I can't. I'm just leaving now.
46:30Okay.
46:31Stop. Don't even speak.
46:34Natalie.
46:37When someone expresses how they feel and you feel a feeling about it,
46:42it doesn't necessarily mean that their intent was to insult you.
46:47You have to allow your partner to have feelings in the same way you do.
46:51How many hours are you supposed to work with us?
46:55Maybe it's time?
46:56It's too much for me for today. I'm sorry. I can't anymore.
46:59Can we stop?
47:00Natalie, I hear you struggling right now.
47:03And that is perfectly normal.
47:05I feel that I have to defend myself. I don't want to defend myself.
47:08We need another therapist, too.
47:10Because you are sexual therapist, so we do sexual therapy.
47:13Other, we discuss.
47:17Okay.
47:19Okay. Thank you. You're done.
47:23I feel like we missed an opportunity today.
47:26I feel like we could have made a lot of progress towards finding
47:32and building upon their physical and emotional connection.
47:36But Natalie's a ball of emotions,
47:38and it seems like she's kind of put up a wall
47:41that she's not really willing to get beyond at this point.
47:46Thank you for your time.
47:47It was nice meeting you.
47:48You forgot your toys.
47:51Oh, you guys can have those.
47:52I don't think so. He doesn't like it.
47:54Okay. All right. I'll take them.
47:56Bye.
47:58I'm not really sure what's in store for them,
48:01given the complete breakdown in communication that I witnessed today.
48:06In order for Natalie to really commit to this process,
48:10she's going to have to regulate her emotions
48:13and really sit with herself so that she can move forward.
48:18You forgot your plate.
48:20Have a nice evening.
48:29Okay.
48:30Bye.
48:36You ready?
48:37Let's do it.
48:38Next time on 90 Day The Last Resort.
48:41Oh my God!
48:44Tonight we are going to stay in the honeymoon suite.
48:48I can just have a little, you know.
48:52You are a horny little creature.
48:54I mean, I was hoping tonight we would get some intimate time.
48:58I'm so glad you invited me.
49:00That is our bed.
49:02But it looks like we're going to have a party instead.
49:08Come on.
49:10Guys, guys.
49:15Today we're going to be using a tool called Sand Tray Therapy.
49:18With the pieces that you have next to you,
49:21you're going to build a picture.
49:23So much toys, sand. I don't know.
49:25I never play pretend to be honest with you.
49:27I never imagination myself.
49:29I never play with myself.
49:31This is family.
49:34My sister.
49:35I have a twin.
49:36Darcy is her name.
49:37There's a lot of conflict.
49:38She recently said something to Florian.
49:40Like, you're better off single, basically.
49:44What sister does that?
49:46That's cold.
49:49We had a conversation this morning.
49:51And Josh said, in his life, he needs stability.
49:54And you're a little all over the place.
49:56What does it mean?
49:57Like you're crazy.
50:00I don't know what to believe anymore.
50:02And now he's not answering the phone.
50:04I don't even know if he's at the resort anymore.
50:07What if he's gone?
50:11For me, in my life, my father teach me to respect people.
50:15Respect people?
50:16You're the most disrespectful people I ever met.
50:19I just hope that a safety leaves your alley.
50:23Do you want a drink?
50:25I'm Jasmine and I'm crazy, dude.