Gogglebox - Season 24 Episode 6
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00:00Does it talk?
00:02Oh, God.
00:04Is it good?
00:05Yeah.
00:06Look.
00:08Go careful.
00:11Oh, lovely.
00:12It's not getting the hang of it, though.
00:13You are.
00:15What you got it for?
00:17Eh?
00:19Oh.
00:23Oh, godly.
00:24Say hello to Jenny.
00:25Hello.
00:26Oh, oh, oh.
00:28Oh!
00:29No!
00:30Here we go.
00:31They've got him.
00:32Oh!
00:33What you doing?
00:34Oh, she's a chicken nugget.
00:36Isn't it embarrassing, Merlin?
00:38Ha, ha.
00:39Ha, ha.
00:40Oh, kiss.
00:41Oh, that's a bit forward.
00:42This is raunchy, innit?
00:43Bring on the delves.
00:44Yeah!
00:45Who's in for the finger this week, innit?
00:47Oh.
00:48Oh.
00:49It's so bad, it's actually good.
00:51It's actually good.
00:52What just happened?
00:53Siri, call Ofcom.
00:57In the week we said a sad goodbye to One Direction star Liam Payne,
01:01we enjoyed lots of great telly.
01:04Brian Cox was blowing our minds on BBC Two.
01:08You might have thought of the solar system as the sun,
01:10and then all the planets lined up all the way out to Pluto.
01:14But we now know that that's just the tip of the iceberg.
01:18Well, you know, Abs, if there was aliens on another planet,
01:21they would actually think we were aliens, cos, I mean, look at us.
01:25But I don't think we look like aliens.
01:27But they won't think they look like aliens.
01:29But they actually do, though, cos they've got alien heads.
01:33You don't know what they look like.
01:35They could look nicer than us.
01:36I've watched E.T., I know what an alien looks like.
01:39Not all aliens are going to look like E.T.
01:43A couple of middle-aged men were mucking about on BBC One.
01:47We've decided to tackle getting older head-on.
01:50Ah!
01:51Oh, my God!
01:53I normally faint on rides, so I don't get to experience what it's like.
01:58I'm literally gone. As soon as I see the bottom, I'm like...
02:01And then I wake up... What is the point?
02:04It's true. I wake up at the end of it, someone goes,
02:06how was it? I guess it was good.
02:08I don't know. Yeah, I wouldn't know.
02:11And the big guns of Bondi were busy as ever on E4.
02:15Do you want to give me a few serious vibes?
02:17Yeah, it doesn't give a shit.
02:19It's getting hot in here.
02:21Oh, yeah. That looks great.
02:23Do you know what he looks like? He looks like me
02:25when I used to get my eyebrows done.
02:27In the single days?
02:28When I was single and I used to get my eyebrows threaded.
02:34You get your eyebrows waxed and the nails...
02:36So stupid!
02:38They look terrible.
02:40I look like an absolute dickhead.
02:42Everybody, they look great.
02:52In Leeds...
02:53I think I've out-cheesed myself.
02:55Out-cheesed yourself?
02:57And coming from me, that's a bold statement.
02:59Sisters Ellie and Izzy.
03:01Because normally what I'll do with the cauliflower cheese
03:03is use the extra mature cheddar in the sauce,
03:06extra mature, and Parmesan and maybe a bit of red Leicester,
03:10something like that.
03:12So I made it, went whole hog, whole bag of extra mature cheddar
03:16in the cheese sauce, tasted it, nearly blew my own head off,
03:19couldn't stand me whisking it, it was that thick.
03:21I even had to put a bit more milk in because I thought...
03:25A bit too cheesy, this.
03:27A bit too cheesy, this.
03:28Oh, I can't wait to taste it.
03:30Never did I think I would utter the words,
03:33a bit too cheesy.
03:35On Sunday night, more folk were quizzing for big bucks on ITV1.
03:40Oh, here we go, Lev.
03:42Who wants to be a millionaire?
03:43Who wants to be a millionaire?
03:45Me.
03:48This is by far the best game show, I don't care.
03:51I think it's, like, the OG.
03:54If someone was trying to cheat, we've all got coughs, so we'd ruin it.
03:57We'd be chucked out.
03:59They'd be like, what?
04:01In the episode, it was Kevin in the hot seat playing for £125,000,
04:06with all of his lifelines still intact.
04:09Ivan Pavlov's experiments in training dogs to associate...
04:14A particular stimulus with being fed, that means eating,
04:18has led to the formulation of which...
04:21..led to the formulation of which theory?
04:24I learnt about this guy in psychology. I should know this.
04:28The reinforcement thing, yes.
04:30No, it's got a name. Positive reinforcement.
04:32Attachment theory.
04:34Classical conditioning. Classical conditioning.
04:37C! C! C! C! C! C!
04:41Or cognitive development.
04:43I think it's C. It is a form of conditioning, isn't it?
04:46Yeah. They ring the bell and the dog drools.
04:48How about we all just guess one? Huh?
04:50There's four of us, there's four answers. We'll guess one.
04:52I'm going C. I'm going B. I'm going C.
04:54No, you've got... No. No, I'm going C. I'm going C.
04:57Basically, he rings a bell every time the dogs are going to be fed
05:02and the dogs sort of salivate.
05:04We've done better than Pavlov.
05:06We trained Dave to ring a bell if he wanted a biscuit. We did.
05:09Never stopped ringing that fucking bell, then, did he?
05:11And that was called classical conditioning.
05:14C! I'm telling you, C!
05:16Do you do classical conditioning?
05:19I think you do when somebody rings the doorbell.
05:22You say, quick, Mary, hide.
05:24This, Kevin, is your question for £250,000.
05:29Right. He's quite clever, old Kev, isn't he?
05:32Kev is storming it.
05:33Introduced in 1967, the Machen series...
05:37Oh! I've heard of this.
05:40..refers to a definitive UK design of what?
05:44Oh, I don't know. No idea, have you?
05:47Was it a car?
05:49I think it might be a car.
05:51Car number plates, telephone boxes,
05:55motorway signs or postage stamps?
05:59Oh! C!
06:02Did you put your hand up?
06:04C! I haven't got a clue with you.
06:06I'm going to go car number plates. Are you?
06:09I'm going to go for postage stamps.
06:12I think I will ask the audience.
06:14I'm sorry, but the audience aren't going to know this.
06:16This is a waste of time.
06:17Oh, he's going to spunk all his lifelines here.
06:20I don't think we've ever asked the audience
06:22for a £250,000 question before.
06:25Let's hope you haven't got a bunch of thick bastards in.
06:27I know, yeah.
06:30Ooh, they're saying motorway signs.
06:32No, the majority have said motorway signs.
06:35So, actually, it could be stamps.
06:37It could be any of them, mate.
06:38I wonder if it is postage stamps, that one, I guess.
06:41So, I think I'm going to go 50-50.
06:44Yeah, go 50-50.
06:46Yeah, I would. It's a lot of money, Kevin.
06:48It is, yeah.
06:49OK, computer, could you take away two wrong answers, please?
06:53Oh!
06:54Postage stamps, then.
06:56I think I will go, then, with postage stamps, final answer.
07:01Oh, my God.
07:02Oh, he's said it, he's going for it.
07:04Please, no.
07:05Shit!
07:08Yes!
07:09Yes!
07:10Yes!
07:11Yes, I knew it.
07:13You didn't know it.
07:14I did.
07:15Why?
07:16Because I knew postage stamps had been out for a long time.
07:20And this question is worth half a million pounds.
07:24Ooh.
07:25What's he got now, phone a friend? Is that all he's got left now?
07:27Yeah, phone a friend.
07:28According to their official measurements...
07:30Right, according to their official measurements,
07:32which of these paintings is the smallest?
07:34Oh, I wouldn't have a clue.
07:36Who's going to know that?
07:37Oh, my God, no-one's going to know that.
07:39The Starry Night, Mona Lisa.
07:41Mona Lisa's smaller than you think.
07:43Is it?
07:44Girl With A Pearl Earring, American Gothic.
07:47Right, think now.
07:49Have you ever seen The Starry Night?
07:51No, neither have you.
07:53What's this?
07:55Right, think now.
07:57That's a horrible question.
07:59Starry Night is Van Gogh, and that's a big bastard.
08:02Van what? Van Gogh.
08:04Personally, right, I'm going with the Girl With A Pearl Earring.
08:08Reasoning behind that is?
08:11It just sounds as if it's going to be small.
08:15I'm going to phone David Harris.
08:17Good choice, David Harris.
08:19God, this is nerve-wracking, innit?
08:21Come on, David.
08:23According to their official measurements,
08:25which of these paintings is the smallest?
08:27You'd be like, can you hear me? No, I can't hear you.
08:30No, can you hear me? No.
08:32Starry Night's not huge, is it?
08:34Oh, and the Mona Lisa's very small.
08:36Oh, God knows.
08:37God knows.
08:38You don't want to wear that.
08:39You don't know, love. He's not 100%.
08:41Take your money, love.
08:43The more I think about it, the more I think it's probably Starry Night.
08:46Oh, don't... Don't talk yourself into it.
08:48Is he going to do it?
08:49No, you knob, it's not.
08:50Don't be an idiot.
08:51I think I'll say...
08:54..I'll take the money.
08:55God, lad.
08:56Yes.
08:57Oh, you clever man.
08:58Clever to the end, Mary.
09:00Yeah.
09:01£250,000, half an hour in a seat, answering some questions.
09:03Easy money.
09:05Yeah, you see, if you'd have said Starry Night,
09:07you'd be leaving here with £125,000.
09:10Whoa!
09:12Oh, that's reassuring, there's closure.
09:15Go with the pearl in.
09:16Really? Yeah, as well.
09:17Yes!
09:19I knew!
09:21You saw it all.
09:23I do.
09:25I'm telling you.
09:27Since when have you been an art expert?
09:31But I sort of thought, right, it can't be that.
09:35It can't be this, it can't be that.
09:38It's got to be the girl with the billion.
09:40You don't like it cos I knew.
09:42Yeah, but it was a total guess.
09:47When was the last time you guys went to a party?
09:49Saturday.
09:501980.
09:51No, no, no.
09:52If it was about 1980, you went to, like, a proper party,
09:54not, like, an old people party.
09:56Michael, Sally and their sons, Jake and Harry.
09:59When does it stop from being, like, having a fun party
10:01and going from sitting around talking to people party?
10:04When's that going to happen?
10:05You seem to walk around and listen to Mr Brightside.
10:08So what do you do at your parties?
10:10Run around and listen to Mr Brightside.
10:12And get drunk.
10:13Totally different.
10:14On Sunday night, a couple of blokes were on their travels on the BBC.
10:19God, there's so many of these bloody road trip programmes,
10:22ain't there?
10:23Jolly boy trip programmes.
10:25Jolly boy trips, yeah.
10:26Middle-aged men can go road tripping
10:28and middle-aged women get the menopause.
10:30It's not quite fair.
10:34I love Paddy McGuinness.
10:35Oh, he's such a hoot.
10:36Right, where are they and where are we tripping?
10:41What have they got in Switzerland?
10:42Chocolate.
10:43Chocolate.
10:44Euthanasia.
10:45This isn't the End Your Life episode, is it?
10:47Absolutely stunning.
10:49It's Dignitas time, lad.
10:51Zurich is truly the land of the beautiful people.
10:54Yeah, everyone's bit of spuck in Switzerland.
10:57And it's not just women keen to look their best.
10:59Men like to look youthful now, don't they?
11:02Founded in 2014,
11:04the Gentleman's Clinic was the first in Switzerland
11:07to dedicate itself to male-only treatments.
11:10Look at that guy. That guy's treated to the end.
11:13Yeah, man. That's like Rylan's Swiss cousin.
11:15They're not making the Wotsit bigger, are they?
11:18What, enlargement?
11:19I'd better put my name down, haven't I?
11:21I would.
11:22Oh, these are the menus.
11:24That's everything Wotsit offer.
11:26There's a menu.
11:27Oh, wow.
11:29Here we are.
11:30Hamilton Norwood scale.
11:32You're the last one, you know.
11:34All right.
11:35Notice you started thinning a little bit.
11:37No, it's not.
11:38Round the crown.
11:39Hello there.
11:40Come on, go on now. Welcome, welcome.
11:42Juliano's 82.
11:44Welcome to the Gentleman's Clinic.
11:46I want to look like you when I go out.
11:48But he's had all the work done, has he?
11:50He's had all the work done.
11:51It's basically just, I'll take you from top to bottom.
11:54Sorry, what?
11:56We do a plasma treatment,
11:58which we do to maintain hair, to increase hair density.
12:01What's plasma treatment?
12:03That sounds really good, plasma treatment.
12:05What's a plasma?
12:07I've got a plasmatellae.
12:09What does that mean?
12:11I don't think it's a plasmatellae.
12:13It might be non-surgical,
12:15but this plasma treatment does involve taking some of your blood.
12:18What? I thought they were having their hair done.
12:22OK, make a fist.
12:24Oh, he's going to have it.
12:25Oh, he is. They couldn't take blood from him.
12:28Look at all that. That's a lot of blood.
12:30It's all going to go back in.
12:32Daniela, are they going to put it in a centrifuge?
12:37Love a centrifuge.
12:39We load in a centrifuge and spin it at 3,000 rpm
12:43to separate out the plasma.
12:45I'll be honest, it's witchcraft.
12:47Who would have thought?
12:49Wow, I've seen this before.
12:51It's fascinating, isn't it? It's clever, isn't it?
12:53This is the plasma. Do you reckon this is going to work?
12:56Just got to inject it now. Easy.
12:58Ooh.
13:00The hell, he's not having it injected into his head, is he?
13:03So this is the wonderful machine.
13:05Oh, Jesus!
13:07It looks like a staple gun.
13:10There are five little tiny needles, look at.
13:12Oh, dear God.
13:14Oh, shit, what's that?
13:16Five needles in your head at one go.
13:19Here we go. OK, this is what it feels like.
13:22Stand by.
13:23It looks like something you fit a carpet with.
13:26One, two, three, go.
13:29Ooh!
13:31Oh, no, that's like...
13:33That looks a bit...
13:35I thought it was going to be quick and painless.
13:37That's what us men have to do.
13:39Oh, stop it.
13:41That makes the eyes water.
13:43Oh, it's bleeding.
13:45For his sake, I really hope this works.
13:47For this to work, I'd need 500 injections every visit.
13:51Oh, I'd rather go bald.
13:53Oh, I would.
13:55Wear a wig and an hat.
13:57What's the saying, Trev? No pain, no gain.
13:59It's enough to make your earth stand on end.
14:01What's left of it?
14:03They're telling me, for maximum effect,
14:05I'd need five more visits.
14:07Oh, no.
14:09Really?
14:11Ow. That's not worth it.
14:13I think once is enough for me.
14:17LAUGHTER
14:21Fucking hell.
14:23For his sake.
14:25He's right, you know, Paddy, it pays off in the end.
14:27That's bad.
14:29Do you know what I mean? Cracking.
14:31This is Zorica, my new man.
14:41In Blackpool...
14:43What are you doing?
14:45This is sage. When you burn it like this,
14:47it gets rid of the negative energy in the house.
14:49Pete and his little sister Sophie.
14:51It's shit.
14:53Exactly. Negative.
14:55Negative vibes, Pedro.
14:57I'm just going to waft it round your hairs.
14:59If you burn me with that,
15:01it'll be the last thing you do.
15:03See, listen to that.
15:05Negativity leaving the house.
15:07No, it isn't. It's a smoke alarm.
15:09It is actually pretty smoky, isn't it?
15:11Fucking hell.
15:13Ah! Ah! Ah!
15:15Dickhead. That's ash.
15:19Duck it out.
15:21Shit.
15:23Duck it out, you dickhead.
15:29Yesterday, there was a proposal from Downing Street
15:31that was making the headlines on the BBC.
15:35What do you fancy for your lunch?
15:37Well, I did want a sandwich,
15:39but someone's bread's not ready.
15:41Good afternoon.
15:43Welcome to the BBC News at One.
15:45Plans to give weight loss injections
15:47to unemployed people living with obesity...
15:49What?
15:51Yeah, I heard about this.
15:53..could be very important for our economy and health,
15:55says the Prime Minister.
15:57If you're not doing a job, you're fine.
15:59You're not a problem. No.
16:01You can continue to be overweight. You can continue.
16:03But if you're unemployed, well...
16:05Keir Starmer was speaking to the BBC
16:07after the Health Secretary, Wes Streeting,
16:09suggested jabs could be an effective tool
16:11for getting unemployed people back into work.
16:13There's too many weight-loss jabs at the moment.
16:15Everyone's taking it.
16:17Even people that aren't fat.
16:19You're going to have to show some ID
16:21when you go into Greg's to bypass the next, aren't you?
16:23Are you unemployed? Are you overweight?
16:25No.
16:27It's estimated that a majority of adults in the UK
16:29are now overweight or obese.
16:31Oh, please don't show me there.
16:33I don't want to see my back there.
16:35Do you remember when we were at school
16:37there would be only one fat child per school?
16:39They were usually very popular.
16:41Yes.
16:43The personal health costs can be severe
16:45and so can the cost to the wider economy.
16:47We should quit our jobs
16:49so we can be overweight and unemployed
16:51and get Manjaro for free.
16:53I must get myself
16:55some tracksuit bottoms, Natty.
16:57Why?
16:59With elasticated waists.
17:01Please don't, Charles.
17:03It's very important for the NHS
17:05because, as I've said time and again,
17:07yes, we need more money for our NHS,
17:09but we've got to think differently.
17:11We've got to reduce the pressure on the NHS.
17:13Good on him, I say.
17:15Well, you would say that, you bloody loving.
17:17Obviously, being overweight
17:19brings on a lot of other medical conditions for people
17:21and we're going to assess people
17:23to see if they really were not fit for work.
17:25But Labour is going to just jab them
17:27into being fit for work.
17:29A trial is now planned to take place
17:31in Greater Manchester over five years.
17:33Why don't you move to Greater Manchester?
17:35It'll examine whether the drug Manjaro,
17:37made by Lilly,
17:39can help people with obesity
17:41to lose weight
17:43and in turn reduce pressure on the NHS
17:45and get people back to work.
17:47So once everyone's skinny...
17:49Everyone's going to be back at work.
17:51There'll be no unemployment at all.
17:53There are no mental health issues.
17:55There are no money issues.
17:57It's all to do with how much you weigh.
17:59It's so easy for people to just sit there and say,
18:01now you can exercise, eat less, move more.
18:03It's not that straightforward, is it?
18:05It's much more complex
18:07and we live in a fat-phobic society as well.
18:09Yeah.
18:11But experts say action must also be taken
18:13to improve the quality of food on sale
18:15and reduce sugar, fats and salt.
18:17Exactly that's it.
18:19It's the ready availability
18:21of high-calorie,
18:23ultra-processed foods that's a problem.
18:25I get a frigging ping from McDonald's,
18:27six chicken nuggets, £1.40,
18:29and I'm thinking, well, I didn't want six chicken nuggets,
18:31but now I might go and get six chicken nuggets.
18:33It's only £1.40.
18:37You know, you look real different today.
18:39Do I? No.
18:41I'm just looking for me glasses.
18:43Best friends Jenny and Lee.
18:45I'm sure I left them here on Friday.
18:47You just had them a minute ago.
18:49Oh, where have I put them then?
18:51Well, you did.
18:53Oh, I can't be bothered to get them up.
18:55What?
18:57I can't be bothered to get them up.
18:59You silly sod.
19:01I thought I'd had them.
19:03I left them here on Friday, you know.
19:05Didn't you notice you'd been sat there
19:07for ten minutes and you didn't notice
19:09that I had your glasses on?
19:11No.
19:13That night, some loaded artists
19:15were at it again on E4.
19:17I'm loving this. I'm loving all the drama.
19:19It's just the Australian version
19:21of Maiden Chancellor.
19:23It's a bag of shite, this duet.
19:29Do you know what? I tune in to watch
19:31Maiden Bondi purely because of Lawson
19:33and his animated self.
19:35Like, why is your neck turning 90 degrees?
19:37It's like he's constantly acting.
19:39Yeah.
19:41OK, this is looking really good.
19:43Woo! Who's that?
19:45Do you want to give me a few serious vibes?
19:47Oh, no.
19:49Oh, it's Lawson.
19:51Do you know he's a very odd boy, that Lawson.
19:53He's got a good body but not a good...
19:55Brain or face?
19:57So how are things going with Bella?
19:59Things are good, Emsi.
20:01Why does he speak like that? I'm good, Emsi.
20:03Yeah.
20:05Believe me.
20:07Built up this very special date
20:09for Bella and I, and...
20:11I'm out of ideas.
20:13He is rich, so he should be able to come up
20:15with something good.
20:17The textbook one is cinema,
20:19all in the bottom of the popcorn.
20:21I think that
20:23I wanted to
20:25speak to you.
20:27Oh, no.
20:29Oh, no.
20:31I'm ready to go.
20:33I've always kind of
20:35had this weird thing that it feels
20:37like I'm not
20:39good enough for you.
20:43No.
20:45Did you see how long the eyes closed for?
20:47This is him.
20:51It
20:53kills me
20:55to hear you.
20:57Speak faster, man. We've got stuff to do.
20:59You're everything
21:01and more.
21:03And you mean more to me
21:05than anyone on this planet.
21:07He's just saying what he thinks he needs to say
21:09in the moment. Do you reckon? Exactly. That's it.
21:11He's saying what she wants to hear.
21:13The problem we've got here is
21:15it's bullshit. Yeah, yeah.
21:17And there's going to be a big but on the end of this.
21:19You mean more to me than anyone
21:21in the world. But.
21:23But. I can't lie.
21:25It's come from my side
21:27out of the blue. Bella's been saying how she
21:29felt from the get-go that she wants something serious.
21:31How could it be blindsided?
21:33Which is why I need time to think.
21:35What? You need time to think?
21:37What's there to think about?
21:39You either love her or you don't.
21:43It's time.
21:47Wow. Let's give it a pat.
21:51I think I've seen it all now.
21:55Hi, lovely ladies.
21:57After having some time to think,
21:59Larson and Bella were reunited at a fancy ball.
22:01My
22:03mind has been
22:05a battleground.
22:07That's a great line.
22:09I'm going to start using that at work.
22:11God.
22:13So dramatic, isn't he?
22:15Yeah.
22:17So I fought
22:19deep and hard. Fucking hell.
22:21He's doing this all, isn't he?
22:23Bloody hell. Is he milking this
22:25or what? I wouldn't have patience for him.
22:27And I
22:29can't
22:31see myself being a boyfriend in this present
22:33moment. Eh? What?
22:35Oh, mixed signal.
22:37Central, piss off.
22:39I have no more time for this now.
22:41None.
22:43Yes, Bella. You tell him.
22:45Exactly. Kick him in the bollocks and walk off.
22:47I completely understand.
22:49That is the
22:51end of the line.
22:53That is the end of the line.
22:55Whoever talks like that is so dramatic.
22:59Why
23:01does he look so sad? It's his decision.
23:03It's the fake quivering of the lip for me.
23:05Now he's regretting it.
23:07Can you see that? He just realised
23:09what happened.
23:13He's looking over his shoulder
23:15to see if he's gone after her. Yeah.
23:17Oh, no, he hasn't. Oh, no.
23:19He's definitely being serious. He's just getting an egg mayo
23:21sandwich at the buffet.
23:23And he's talking to some other girl.
23:29In Manchester...
23:31Right, last week,
23:33I went to the shop. They had the Christmas
23:35rum truffles in. Bought four
23:37boxes. Put them in my Christmas
23:39cupboard. Who's had my Christmas
23:41rum truffles? There's one pack
23:43gone. The Malones.
23:45I'll be honest. I ate the
23:47Turkish delights, but I've not had the
23:49rum truffles. You ate my Turkish delights!
23:51I had the Turkish delights.
23:53And the rum truffles.
23:55And the Turkish delights.
23:57How do you know you don't like rum truffles if you've not had them?
23:59Because I've had them all the other years.
24:01Never mind the rum truffles! I didn't know
24:03the Turkish delights was gone.
24:05On Monday, we set sail
24:07once more for a culinary
24:09voyage down the Thames on Food Network.
24:11I'm the biggest.
24:13I knew you'd do that.
24:15Well, I am. Thank you.
24:17I love a bit of route
24:19back down the river.
24:21Oh, you obviously do as well.
24:23Michelle, who's the biggest?
24:25No, Michelle Rue.
24:27Michelle Rue is one of the world's
24:29greatest chefs.
24:31That is his actual name, Michelle Rue.
24:33Oh, it's a boy?
24:35This
24:37is my route back down the river.
24:41The one thing I would say about Michelle Rue's
24:43cooking is you really don't know what's coming next.
24:45You don't get him going down the fucking Tyne,
24:47do you? Up in Newcastle.
24:49I stopped at Bijou for a burger
24:51and a beer.
24:53In a fight.
24:55In the episode, Michelle made it
24:57all the way to Reading
24:59to visit a restaurant on a boat.
25:01People are drawn here to enjoy
25:03the traditional dishes,
25:05and Chung is going to show me a favourite.
25:07What is it? Come on then, Chung.
25:09What are you making for us today?
25:11Hong Kong-style French toast.
25:13Oh!
25:15Is French toast like eggy bread?
25:17Eggy bread.
25:19Obsessed. I love it.
25:21I didn't even know they did French toast
25:23in Hong Kong.
25:25No, but we did get food poisoning, though.
25:27We did. Yeah.
25:29That was unexpected.
25:31This one has a thick layer of peanut butter.
25:33Peanut butter, yeah.
25:35Yeah, that's nice.
25:37Peanut butter. Sautéed. Nice.
25:39I eat it. I've never tried it.
25:41Have you? Yeah.
25:43OK, so, crusts off. Yes.
25:45Oh, that's you, that. You don't like anything
25:47with crusts on. No, I don't.
25:49You just waste all the bread.
25:51That's what the goodness is, isn't it?
25:53Do you remember that? Yes, Mum.
25:55She won't get curly hair.
25:57I don't want curly hair. I don't want
25:59to eat a crust. We got egg?
26:01Yeah, we will separate the egg yolk and the white.
26:03Oh, he separates the egg yolk and the white.
26:05I never do that. Never, ever, ever.
26:07Uh-huh.
26:09Oh, bloody hell. Oh, God.
26:11He's giving that a good whisk, isn't he?
26:13He's whipping that, isn't he?
26:15Jesus, he's going to have a wrang on his hands
26:17at this level.
26:19And now we soak it.
26:21He's soaking it, Daniella.
26:23I'm really funny with touching yolk.
26:25French toast is fried in dollops
26:27of sizzling butter.
26:29Jesus Christ.
26:31Look at the oil.
26:33Look how deep that pan is.
26:35Nothing healthy about this.
26:37But Cheung is using vegetable oil.
26:39Vegetable oil. Oh.
26:41He's on the veggie oil, thinking of his tikka.
26:43Yeah. Because it's served with
26:45syrup. Oh, my God, that is golden.
26:47Yeah. Usually, yeah.
26:49So, it's sweet.
26:51I hope he gets it on a bit of kitchen roll
26:53and gives it a dab. Yeah, he needs
26:55a blot, that. And there's more.
26:57Oh, my God.
26:59Oh, Jesus, have mercy.
27:01What a wedge. Oh, God.
27:03Mmm.
27:05Stop it.
27:07Oh.
27:09That's not food, that's a lethal weapon, isn't it?
27:11Yeah.
27:13Mmm.
27:23Does he like it?
27:25Do you like it, Michelle?
27:27I love food that makes me giggle.
27:29The texture's amazing.
27:31No food that I've eaten's ever made me laugh.
27:33Oh, it looks horrible. No, it doesn't.
27:35It does not. Am I allowed to have an opinion?
27:37No. No. Nice and crisp
27:39on the outside. With that butter,
27:41I could whack my fork on top of it
27:43and just guide it round
27:45all the bread on top.
27:47Oh, I'll be good.
27:49Thinking about it, we've got all the ingredients.
27:51Do you want me to make that for you? No, you can't.
27:53No. My poor heart.
27:55He's trying to kill you.
27:57He's trying to kill me. Have you got life insurance?
27:59No, I haven't. She's not got life insurance.
28:03In Glasgow...
28:05I've read 42 books this year.
28:07Honestly, mate, this also has to stop.
28:09Why? Because the house looks like the fucking Mitchell Library.
28:15You're actually slagging me for buying books.
28:17I can't do anything. Yeah, you're a nerd.
28:19First it was clothes. Oh, the house is coming down
28:21with clothes. And then I change my
28:23interest and I actually try and better
28:25and educate myself and then I'm getting slagged for that
28:27and you say our house looks like Waterstones. There's a world history section
28:29in our house. How did that get there?
28:31Maybe you should try and pick up
28:33a book. I do. Rather than looking
28:35at a screen. I do read books. Green Eggs and Ham.
28:37I think the books you read are on the Xbox
28:39when you get your character to read a book.
28:41Maybe you wouldn't have square eyes
28:43if you read more books. Are they rectangle eyes?
28:45Yeah, like me.
28:47This week, we were all gripped
28:49by a twisted tale of revenge
28:51on Sky. It's a dark drama, you know
28:53this, Jenny. It's a thriller.
28:55You love thrillers. I do, but I
28:57can guess from the... I think we should turn
28:59the lights down. No, I don't want the lights turning
29:01down, thanks. Since when have you had
29:03Sky Atlantic? Oh, I've still got your
29:05dog in. You cheeky sod.
29:21I like this music.
29:27It must be said up north, this. You know, you don't
29:29get anybody down south saying,
29:31oh, you alright, sweet pea? No, it's all treacle
29:33down there. Yeah, govner.
29:35People I'd love to kill.
29:37Do you know, sometimes I drive to
29:39work thinking that. Manspreaders.
29:41I'm with you there, girl.
29:43Oh, what, are manspreaders?
29:45Oh.
29:47My sister, Saren.
29:49A sister as well? For leaving me
29:51on read, on my phone, and in
29:53my life in general. So it's not just
29:55me then? You read and
29:57then don't reply.
29:59So yours is actually
30:01worse than her sister's.
30:03Our mum, for leaving,
30:05and forgetting to tell us where
30:07she went. For the sound of things,
30:09she wants to write about half the planet.
30:11And forever at the top of my list.
30:13They're mean girls,
30:15innit? Always, always.
30:17So weird. Julia Blankingsop,
30:19for making me pull
30:21so much of my hair out that I had to wear
30:23a wig.
30:25Oh, she's had a tough life, hasn't she?
30:27Bless her. Julia
30:29Blankingsop, for
30:31turning me into a ghost.
30:33A ghost. Well, Julia can't
30:35see anything. She's wearing a lime green dress.
30:37I feel a little bit sorry for her at the moment.
30:39But she's sort of become
30:41like a ghost. She's anonymous almost, isn't
30:43she? Yeah, yeah. She's shrunk back in
30:45because people are giving her such a hard time.
30:51Oh God, this must be Rhiannon's dad's funeral.
30:55Oh look, she's in the car all on her own with the
30:57dog. On her way to her dad's funeral.
30:59Where's her sister?
31:03Oh, that's sister.
31:05Oh, er, sorry, thank you.
31:07They're just walking by her as if she's
31:09invisible.
31:11Oh no!
31:13It's the girls from school.
31:15What are they doing at the funeral then?
31:17No, not Julia
31:19Blim Blam Blom at the dad's funeral.
31:21Oh shit!
31:23That would be the fucking
31:25cherry on top. Yeah.
31:27Of a shite day.
31:29I've got them to do mini scotch eggs
31:31especially. I only eat meat when I'm menstruating.
31:33Oh God, she's nice,
31:35isn't she?
31:37Sorry, didn't see you.
31:39Julia blinking sops at it again.
31:41She's getting on my nerves.
31:43I don't even know her. Oh my God,
31:45hi! It's been so long,
31:47hasn't it?
31:49She still looks
31:51frightened to death of her, doesn't she?
31:53I mean, I haven't seen you since school
31:55so long ago.
31:57You're so different now, aren't we?
31:59You don't appear to be
32:01any different, Julia. It's funny how the
32:03bullies, right, never go, oh, I used to bully you.
32:05You know, whenever I see them out
32:07and about now, oh, are you alright?
32:09Yeah, fuck off.
32:13Were you just going to go?
32:15She didn't even say bye.
32:17That's something you'd do to me, to be fair.
32:19They're all going for a union drink at Square tomorrow.
32:21You should go.
32:23No, thanks. Are you joking?
32:25Are you having a laugh, mate?
32:27Do you want me to go for a drink with them?
32:29Yeah, nah.
32:31We need to sell the house. Oh, great.
32:33Bloody hell.
32:35I've got an estate agent, Julia's doing it.
32:37Julia? No!
32:39Oh, just to stick
32:41the knife in.
32:43No, Saren. I'm sorry,
32:45I cannot say I'm like her.
32:47She's a sister from hell. I wouldn't do that shit to you.
32:49Are you sure? I would not.
32:51You need to get over this Julia thing.
32:53Go to Square,
32:55you might have fun. Get over it?
32:57I lost my whole head of hair
32:59because of her.
33:03Don't tell me she's gone to the... Is she going to the Square?
33:05Don't, please don't tell me.
33:11This is Julia's reunion?
33:13Where did she go?
33:15Julia!
33:17Oh my God, she walked straight past her.
33:19Wow, Julia didn't even acknowledge her.
33:21I didn't see you.
33:23She never sees her, does she?
33:25She wasn't right testing that girl.
33:27She's just trying to say to me you're insignificant.
33:29Are you OK?
33:31Does she look OK?
33:33I need you to stay out of my house.
33:35That's right.
33:37Sweetie, your sister has signed the contract.
33:39You need to sort this out with your sister.
33:41Why me, Julia?
33:43She's grabbed her by the wrist.
33:45She's all kicking off.
33:47Stop pretending that you don't know what you did.
33:49Oh, what did she do?
33:51I have no idea what you're talking about.
33:53You ruined my life.
33:55Yeah, all those years of abuse, you made me pull my hair out.
33:57You didn't exist to me then,
33:59and you don't now.
34:01What a bitch.
34:03I don't like Julia. She's a mean girl, Simon.
34:05Mean girl.
34:07It's like you're obsessed with me.
34:09Oh!
34:15She is absolutely invisible.
34:17It's incredible.
34:21What's she doing down the canal?
34:25Oh, God, you won't catch me
34:27walking there in the dead of the night.
34:29No way.
34:31Just go home, love, and have a cup of tea and a biscuit.
34:33It'll all look better.
34:35What is it?
34:37I can't do shit without you.
34:41Oh!
34:43I think that must have belonged to her dad.
34:47Oh, charming.
34:51Oh!
34:53Oh, he's weeing over her.
34:55What the fuck?
34:57Whoa, didn't see you.
34:59Say sorry.
35:01Didn't see you. Invisible again.
35:03Oh!
35:05He's just took her over the edge.
35:07Oh, what the fuck?
35:09Do you see me now?
35:11Go on, girl.
35:13I'll fucking end you, you stupid bitch.
35:15Oh, Jesus Christ.
35:17You are so fucking...
35:19Oh, my God.
35:25Do you see me now?
35:27Yeah, yeah.
35:29I'm scared now.
35:31See, this is what it does to people
35:33if you keep them off that long.
35:35Yeah, you want to think about that and all.
35:45In Leeds...
35:47Were you hungover at weekend?
35:49Oh, yeah, was I.
35:51Were you hanging, though?
35:53Quite.
35:55So, I were a bit hungover.
35:57I went for a Sunday dinner.
35:59I went for a roast at 12.
36:01And he booked it.
36:03And he booked it for 12 o'clock.
36:05He's so keen, isn't he?
36:07I thought, who? We were fuming.
36:09That's like Potter and Dean going to Calvary at half eleven.
36:11Yeah, he said, you've only just had your breakfast by 12 o'clock.
36:13You're not ready for a full roast, are you?
36:15No, I have, like, elevenses on a Sunday.
36:17Exactly.
36:19It's lazy morning.
36:21Slow morning.
36:23Yeah, exactly, but he's the type of person that has Christmas dinner at 12.
36:25Yeah.
36:27Do you know what I mean?
36:29On Monday night,
36:31there were more Bobbies chasing baddies on Channel 5.
36:33When I was a policewoman,
36:35we had wooden trunctions.
36:37They've got metal ones now.
36:39Dad probably dreams of joining the show, innit?
36:41Yeah.
36:43The amount of times he watches it.
36:45He listens so carefully as well.
36:47Sometimes he's like this.
36:51I do like the chase.
36:53That's a different show, Jane, that one.
36:55Oh, the police chase.
36:57Oh, my God.
36:59Mother lives in Northampton.
37:01The epicentre of crime.
37:03I can't imagine it's her, though.
37:05She's in her eighties now.
37:07Multiple units are hunting an Alfa Romeo
37:09that failed to stop the blue lights.
37:11Blues and twos are on, Julie.
37:13We're chasing an Alfa Romeo.
37:15Interceptors soon have it in their sights.
37:17Built-up area, you know.
37:19It's residential.
37:21That's very fast down a suburban street.
37:23Terrifying, innit?
37:25Cos he's done something illegal.
37:27Perhaps his wife is having a baby or something like, innit?
37:29But the XC60 soon brings him in.
37:31Ooh, you've got an XC60.
37:33There's nothing more exciting
37:35than being in that car,
37:37chasing.
37:39He's on the footpath.
37:41Oh, no, no, not on the footpath.
37:43Suspect on the path, on the path,
37:45on the path.
37:47What did he gain from doing that?
37:49No, this guy's mad.
37:51The nippy Italian number
37:53may be a match for the Volvo.
37:55But the Volvo is more safe, isn't it?
37:57Uh-huh.
38:01But it's no match for German engineering.
38:03Is this the big boys coming out to play now, yeah?
38:05In the BMW 340i...
38:07Oh!
38:09They're getting the BMW on him now.
38:11The baby's in town.
38:13Bertie and Sandra have joined the party.
38:15Bertie and Sandra, my name.
38:17Oh, this kick-ass time, Mary.
38:19Bertie gallops after the Alfa,
38:21tracking it out of town
38:23towards a possible stinger site.
38:25Oh, stinger.
38:27Stinger, that's one of them, isn't it?
38:29Where they put it in the road and it nails your tyres.
38:35They're going to get him now.
38:37Come on!
38:39Here we go.
38:41Daniela, they're going to get him.
38:43They're actually going to get him.
38:45It's there.
38:47Did they get it?
38:49It's bang on schedule.
38:51They've done it. Did he do it? Yeah.
38:53His tyres are flat now.
38:55Alfa male is out of the traps and away.
38:57He's got a fag on.
38:59He's getting a bit stressed.
39:01It's now a footrace
39:03and the Interceptors are hot on his heels.
39:05Get him, Peter!
39:07I'll have no chance.
39:09Not with your short legs, love.
39:11With more units closing in,
39:13the suspect nips down an alleyway.
39:15He's as fast as the Alfa, isn't he?
39:17I'm not going to risk getting a migraine
39:19from watching this now.
39:21But then gets snagged while trying to scale some spiked railings.
39:23It's snagged!
39:25It's got stuck.
39:27How's it going?
39:29His leg's bleeding.
39:31Oh, boo-hoo.
39:33Stop! I'm going back over.
39:35I'm going back over. I stopped.
39:37The officers have their man.
39:39But not for long.
39:41Where are you going to stop?
39:43I don't see he gets away.
39:45He's running.
39:47The injured suspect legs it towards the back garden.
39:49Go on, get the ducks out.
39:51Do not move.
39:53What's he got in his hand?
39:55He's got a taser.
39:57I do think he has done enough to deserve a tasering by this point.
39:59You'd be getting done for police brutality, you tasering people.
40:01If you move...
40:03I will shoot you.
40:05I will kill you.
40:07You'll be tasered.
40:09Go on, get him.
40:11Give him a perm.
40:13Do as you're told, you little shit.
40:15Don't go anywhere.
40:17Don't go anywhere.
40:19A quick check of his vitals.
40:21Oh, look, he is bleeding.
40:23Reveals a puncture wound to the upper leg.
40:25Oh, it's ginger.
40:27Those are the ones you least expect.
40:29Oh, yeah, I do love a ginger.
40:31It's right up your street. Ginger bad boy.
40:35In Wiltshire.
40:37Now, the trick was, I got it off YouTube,
40:39put some green tomatoes
40:41in a box with a banana
40:43and Bob's your uncle,
40:45in seven days' time,
40:47they'll have turned red.
40:49Giles and his wife, Mary.
40:51Let's take these
40:53four out and leave these in,
40:55shall we?
40:57Yeah.
40:59And then we can have these
41:01with our streaky bacon
41:03tomorrow breakfast.
41:05Oh, you know I don't have breakfast.
41:07Stop it.
41:09You're going to make yourself unattractive.
41:11On Monday night,
41:13BBC Two took us somewhere
41:15out of this world.
41:17This one for you? Yep.
41:19I like space and stuff.
41:21He's got dressed up for Brian. In honour of Brian.
41:23Yeah. We love Brian, though.
41:25Yeah.
41:27It's like you, George, is a sexy nerd.
41:29This is a journey to the least
41:31explored regions of our solar system.
41:33The solar system, is that like
41:35the moon and the
41:37Earth and all that?
41:39Well, yeah. Yeah.
41:41I don't know much about it.
41:43I think the solar system is fascinating, honestly.
41:45LAUGHTER
41:47Literally
41:49didn't even start yet.
41:51I didn't even go into why or how.
41:53LAUGHTER
41:55You don't give a shit about the solar system.
41:57Don't you dare tell me
41:59I don't give a shit about my solar system.
42:01OK?
42:03ROARING
42:05ROARING
42:07We're going to have a mental sweat
42:09watching this, cos we'll be like,
42:11what the fuck is going on?
42:13In fairness to Harry, he does know his stuff
42:15when it comes to space. And we really don't.
42:17Yeah.
42:19There is a gas...
42:21There is a gas cloud out there,
42:23which is bigger than our solar system,
42:25which is purely bit.
42:27Purely bit?
42:29Past the Kuiper belt, we enter a realm
42:31of true darkness.
42:33I'm excited by space,
42:35but I'm also scared of space.
42:37But every now and then,
42:39things do show up in the darkness.
42:41Oh, they've spotted something.
42:43What?
42:45What's showing up, Brian?
42:47Oh, hang on.
42:49What is it?
42:51In 2018, a faint point of light
42:53was detected.
42:55What is that? Is that a little planet?
42:57Could be a planetesimal or an asteroid.
42:59Or a flying saucer.
43:0110 billion kilometres
43:03beyond the Kuiper belt.
43:05Right, so I think what they're saying is
43:07where they've seen light,
43:09light shouldn't be there from what we already know.
43:11So the knowledge that we already have,
43:13but through this whole thing
43:15of the twinkling where we know it should stop,
43:17they went, hold up, wait a minute.
43:19Something's going on there, sir.
43:21Is there?
43:23It's a dwarf planet.
43:25Nicknamed Far, Far Out.
43:27Far, Far Out.
43:29That's a bit of a primary school name, isn't it?
43:31But we think there's more out there.
43:33Called Far, Far, Far Out.
43:39Imagine that pinnacle is the sun.
43:41Right, here's the explanation.
43:43Now, Neptune is about 30 metres
43:45away from the sun,
43:47so on our scale, that means that the Earth
43:49would be one metre away.
43:51What? Are we doing things to scale?
43:53Yeah, he's going to try and show you how big it is.
43:55One metre.
43:57That's called one astronomical unit,
43:59the distance of the Earth from the sun.
44:01It's about 150 million kilometres.
44:03Get me a piece of paper and a pen.
44:05I need to write this down.
44:07Well, it's quite far away, then,
44:09because when I ran the Great North Run,
44:11that was, like, 22 kilometres,
44:13and I felt like that was going on forever.
44:15Yeah.
44:17So 150 million kilometres.
44:19That's far.
44:21And then, to the most distant object we can see...
44:23Here we go.
44:25I've always had to break into a run.
44:27It's that far. It's that far.
44:29It is, of course, far, far out.
44:31I'm not even going to lie,
44:33my brain's not taking none of this in, you know.
44:35LAUGHTER
44:37But remarkably,
44:39we strongly believe
44:41that there's another region,
44:43another realm to the solar system.
44:45Canary's jumping in a jeep.
44:47Is he getting in his car to drive to it?
44:49I told you, the solar system does not end
44:51It does keep going.
44:53Would you like a medal or something?
44:55Yes, I bloody would, cos I knew this,
44:57and everyone was saying I was wrong.
44:59You genius.
45:011,100 astronomical units.
45:03Whoa.
45:05Well, it's quite far away, that's what I'm gathering.
45:09He's still going!
45:11I'm going to sound like a kid here when I say this,
45:13but are we there yet? Yeah.
45:15Here we are,
45:17two kilometres away from the sun.
45:19Do you see the sun?
45:21That rock's the sun.
45:23The rock's the sun.
45:25I don't matter.
45:27And this is where we think
45:29another realm begins.
45:31It's all becoming clear now, isn't it?
45:33What, to you?
45:35Yeah.
45:37Is it?
45:39You're having a laugh, aren't you?
45:41Well, you've got family
45:43that are a few hours away,
45:45and we don't bother going to see them.
45:47Yeah.
45:49You know, if it's anything over 15 minutes, I'm not asked.
45:51Fuck them.
45:57It's a Gogglebox Stand Up To Cancer
45:59celebrity special next week,
46:01followed by a topical tiptoe
46:03through these tempestuous times
46:05as The Last Leg returns at ten.
46:07And if patience isn't one of your virtues,
46:09stream our apocalypse not now,
46:11but at some point very soon sitcom Everyone Else Burns Now,
46:13rather than watching it Thursdays at ten.
46:15Nothing to stop you doing both, obviously.
46:17Brand new First Dates, next tonight.