"Husbands, your wife is starving for these 3 things—and if you ignore them, her love will slowly fade away."
💔 Brothers, be honest—do you:
Think providing financially is enough? ❌
Assume she knows you love her without saying it? ❌
Forget the emotional needs NO WOMAN will beg for? ❌
💔 Brothers, be honest—do you:
Think providing financially is enough? ❌
Assume she knows you love her without saying it? ❌
Forget the emotional needs NO WOMAN will beg for? ❌
Category
🛠️
LifestyleTranscript
00:00What is the primary need that a woman wants from her husband?
00:09What's the primary emotion?
00:11That is the continual love and the continual enveloping of that attention
00:17that the husband always makes his wife his priority.
00:20The husband always shows his wife that I'm thinking about you,
00:24I'm caring about you, i.e. I will always love you.
00:27To feel that love, to feel cherishment,
00:30they need to be constantly reassured that their husbands love them,
00:34that their husbands always take them as number one, always.
00:39If women could get away with it, they want to be put on the pedestal
00:42and the husband just looks at them all day and night,
00:44and that would be great for them, right?
00:46They want to be number one in their husband's lives.
00:49So they want constant reassurance that the husband always loves them.
00:54Now, brothers, listen to this.
00:56Wives, do not take your love for granted.
01:00You take your wives' loves for granted.
01:02You don't need your wife to constantly reassure you that you love me, you love me.
01:07No, you take it for granted.
01:08The fact that she's still living with you shows you she loves you.
01:11Well, it doesn't work the other way around.
01:13It does not work the other way around.
01:17A woman is always double guessing.
01:20Does he still love me?
01:21Does he still think about me?
01:22Does he still care about me?
01:23Does he still put me number one?
01:25And therefore, a woman has to have constant reassurance.
01:29And not only this, but another issue that men need to be sensitive to and understand.
01:33Women are very conscious of their looks and they're comparing their looks with other women all the time.
01:41We guys don't do that.
01:42We don't care about other looks of men and we don't compare ourselves.
01:45But women are always thinking,
01:47am I still beautiful enough for him?
01:49Does he still think me attractive?
01:50Maybe I've gained a few pounds.
01:51Maybe after the third kid, this and that.
01:53She's always double guessing her looks, her figure.
01:56And so the husband always has to make her feel the most beautiful,
02:00the most cherished, the most loved, the most admired.
02:04She always wants these reassurances.
02:06How does he do this?
02:08I'll just point out a number of them.
02:09Number one, words, words, words.
02:12Never underestimate the power of speech.
02:15Simply saying, I love you.
02:18I know it's awkward for men after the courting phrase.
02:20I know it's awkward, right?
02:22But believe me, it never goes out of fashion.
02:25For women, it never goes out of fashion.
02:28They always love to hear this phrase.
02:31And in fact, there are da'if hadith of our Prophet ﷺ.
02:32It's a bit da'if hadith, but it's still mentioned in our books that
02:35our Prophet ﷺ and Aisha were joking once.
02:38And Aisha said to the Prophet ﷺ,
02:40كَيْفَ حُبُّكَ لِيْهِ
02:41How much do you love me?
02:42How is your love for me?
02:43And our Prophet ﷺ said,
02:45and he gave a beautiful, metaphorical, poetic expression.
02:48He said, my love for you is like the tight knot
02:51that cannot be unbound.
02:53My love for you is like the tight knot
02:55that cannot be unbound.
02:56So then, in the future,
02:58sometimes if they would have a bit of an issue,
03:00a bit of an argument,
03:01one of the two would remark,
03:02how is the knot right now?
03:04How is the knot right now?
03:05And Aisha would say this
03:06when the Prophet ﷺ sometimes got irritated.
03:08How is the knot?
03:09So he would smile, he would say,
03:10as strong as it ever was.
03:12Right?
03:13And this hadith is in Dara Qutni.
03:14Now the point being that
03:15the words I love you
03:17are something very important,
03:18but not just I love you.
03:20Praising her and what she does.
03:22Husbands,
03:23never take your wife's actions for granted.
03:26Suppose she is cooking
03:27and cleaning most of the time.
03:30Never take it for granted.
03:31Always, once in a while,
03:33come and compliment her.
03:34MashaAllah, that was great.
03:35You know, I really appreciate
03:36what you're doing for me.
03:37Those words, they go a long way.
03:40Your wife realizes,
03:41you know what,
03:41he's not taking me for granted.
03:43Very important.
03:45Praise her looks
03:46when she dresses up,
03:47when she does something
03:47extra special for you.
03:49Never take it for granted.
03:51Husbands, you all know
03:52the big danger
03:52of forgetting anniversaries.
03:54Right?
03:54You all know how dangerous that is.
03:56Why do women want you
03:58to know their anniversaries?
03:59Because it makes them feel
04:01you still love them.
04:02Makes them feel
04:03he still remembers me,
04:04he still cherishes me.
04:06And celebrating anniversaries,
04:08honestly, I believe
04:09there are some scholars
04:10they say it's haram bid'ah.
04:11SubhanAllah,
04:12quote me,
04:13celebrating anniversaries
04:14is mustahab.
04:15It is encouraged
04:16in our religion.
04:17What greater thing to do
04:19than for the husband
04:20to tell his wife
04:21over and over again
04:22that I love you,
04:23I'll do it all over again.
04:24Take them out
04:25for a romantic dinner.
04:26Be romantic with your wife.
04:28What better way
04:29of showing that love?
04:30There's nothing wrong at all
04:32to show that love
04:33on your anniversary days.
04:34This is something
04:35that the shari'ah
04:36encourages the husband and wife
04:37to have that lovely bond together.
04:39Another thing
04:40that the woman wants
04:41is time.
04:44And time,
04:45this is now
04:45a difference in language.
04:47For husbands,
04:48time means
04:49the watch on your hand.
04:51So when the wife says,
04:52you never spend time with me,
04:54immediately he goes
04:55into calculation mode.
04:56I sleep eight hours in the day,
04:58I have breakfast one hour,
04:59I come home,
04:59that's ten hours with you.
05:02How can you say
05:02I never have time for you?
05:04Right?
05:04Because he's thinking of time
05:06in the dictionary definition of time.
05:08That's the clock.
05:09No, no, no, no.
05:10Women have a different dictionary.
05:12Women have a different vocabulary.
05:14For women,
05:15time means attention.
05:20Undivided quality attention.
05:23So, you're working
05:25five days of the week.
05:26You have that Saturday night free.
05:28And you wanna go
05:29and you wanna watch
05:30a television match.
05:31You wanna watch a cricket game.
05:32You wanna go and play some basketball.
05:33You wanna do this and that.
05:34That is quality time.
05:37And you have just shown your wife
05:38when you have quality time,
05:40you don't wanna spend it with her.
05:42So what does that mean?
05:43You never go out with the guys?
05:44No, of course you have to go out with the guys.
05:46But understand,
05:47when she's asking for time,
05:49she wants quality time.
05:51And this also,
05:52when she comes to you
05:53to help,
05:53to come for advice,
05:54she wants some issue to solve.
05:56One of the biggest problems
05:57that men have
05:58is they think
05:59as if
06:00the woman is coming to him
06:02to solve her problem.
06:04So immediately he'll say,
06:05oh, you did this wrong,
06:06you did that wrong,
06:07you should do this,
06:07you should do that.
06:08And that is not
06:09what the woman wants.
06:11What does the woman want?
06:12The woman wants a,
06:13the woman wants a
06:15loving ear,
06:17a sympathetic ear.
06:19She wants somebody
06:19to listen to her problem,
06:21to be sympathetic to her,
06:23not necessarily
06:24to solve her problem.
06:26This is quality time.
06:27to express
06:28that whatever she went through
06:30was frustrating,
06:30was problematic,
06:31and inshallah,
06:32they will work it out.
06:33You have to give
06:34what the woman wants
06:36and in return,
06:36she will give what you want.
06:38When the man gives love,
06:40when the man gives that,
06:42what we call romance,
06:43and romance is nothing.
06:44Men,
06:44men think romance
06:45is a very dangerous word.
06:47They never want to use it.
06:48Right?
06:49All romance means is
06:50you show her
06:52you're thinking about her.
06:53You show her
06:54you're caring about her.
06:55Husbands,
06:55the phrase I love you,
06:57giving roses,
06:58remembering the anniversaries,
07:00taking them out,
07:01spending quality time.
07:02This is what romance is.
07:04When you give the wife the love,
07:06you make her feel
07:07like she's number one,
07:08guess what?
07:09She'll make you feel
07:10like you're number one.
07:11And so the both of you
07:12make each other feel
07:13like number one,
07:14and that's exactly
07:15what marriage is all about.
07:16and that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:22And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:24And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:25And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:26And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:27And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:28And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:29And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:30And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:31And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:32And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:33And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:34And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:35And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:36And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:38And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:40And that's exactly what marriage is all about.
07:41And that's exactly what marriage is all about.