Good Morning Pakistan | 2 May 2025 | ARY Digital - video Dailymotion

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Catch the latest Pakistani drama series and Subscribe for more! ➡️ https://bit.ly/arydigitalyt  Good Morning Pakistan | Muqabla Bazi Sahi Nahi, Special Show | Sarwat Gilani | Rabia Farooqi | 2 May 2025 | ARY Digital  Watch All Good Morning Pakistan Shows Here👉 https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLb2aaNHUy_gFm7pp6GLxHosg7jxa027RO  Host: Nida Yasir  Special Guests : Sarwat Gilani , Rabia Farooqi  Good Morning Pakistan is your first source of entertainment as soon as you wake up in the morning, keeping you energized for the rest of the day.  Timing: Every Monday – Friday at 9:00 AM on ARY Digital.  #sarwatgilani #morningshow #ary   #goodmorningpakistan #nidayasir #arydigitalshow #arydigital   Pakistani Drama Industry's biggest Platform, ARY Digital, is the Hub of exceptional and uninterrupted entertainment. You can watch quality dramas with relatable stories, Original Sound Tracks, Telefilms, and a lot more impressive content in HD. Subscribe to the YouTube channel of ARY Digital to be entertained by the content you always wanted to watch.

Transcript

00:00:00This is the morning that I've come to you

00:00:09I'm full of your face

00:00:11I'm full of your face

00:00:13I'm full of your face

00:00:21I've come to the USA

00:00:23This morning that I've come to you

00:00:30I'm full of your face

00:00:44I'm full of your face

00:00:50I'm full of my face

00:00:53I'm full of my face

00:00:57Good morning, Pakistan.

00:01:17As-salamu alaykum. Good morning. Good morning, Pakistan.

00:01:22What are the conditions? How are you?

00:01:24It's okay. It's fun. It's fun.

00:01:26Today's topic we are going to share with you.

00:01:31It was very important.

00:01:33And it was understood that if we will compare to another,

00:01:40whether it be a school or home,

00:01:43then we will achieve better humans in a certain time.

00:01:45Our training, our race,

00:01:48we will learn a lot of things to make life.

00:01:51This was a good thing because it was a healthy competition, but slowly in class there were a lot of children whose self-esteem was zero because of their interaction with other students.

00:02:10So now after research, the children who are backbenchers are the same way that the whole body gave them everything, but every person is different from the other.

00:02:25And someone is strong in some kind, someone is strong in some kind, someone is strong in some kind, someone is strong in some kind.

00:02:32But if there is a comparison on one thing, then teachers can't make a lot of students.

00:02:41Students can make a lot of students, but they can't make a lot of students.

00:02:45And they can make a lot of students sometimes as a villain.

00:02:49You can see there are many children who have a negative impact on their competition,

00:02:55and they can't bully themselves, and they can't do their self-esteem.

00:03:00Their self-esteem is low, their children are poor, personality wise,

00:03:05they can't get hurt, not only in school, but also in their personal life.

00:03:10And that's how they also have siblings with their sisters.

00:03:12In addition, those siblings who have died after the mother,

00:03:18they can't become one of them.

00:03:19They can't become one of them.

00:03:20For those siblings who live with their children who live in one of them,

00:03:22they become one of them.

00:03:24They become one of them.

00:03:25Just because of the comparison is not healthy,

00:03:27their relationship is not healthy.

00:03:31And that's the reason why all the stories of many stories

00:03:39they hear from their children,

00:03:40their relationship is not healthy.

00:03:41The story of marriage is not healthy.

00:03:43This has been the same,

00:03:46has been killed and has been killed and has been killed and has been killed.

00:03:51Then this thing is not going to happen in life.

00:03:53You go to the hospital,

00:03:55everyone knows that it's a pain.

00:03:58After the pandemic, the comparison begins.

00:04:01It's like that, it's like that, it's like that,

00:04:04it's like that, it's like that,

00:04:06it's like that.

00:04:07And in this state,

00:04:08there is a love relationship,

00:04:10which is a good and bad relationship,

00:04:14it's like that,

00:04:16it's like that.

00:04:18So, today, basically,

00:04:20we will give you a few tips

00:04:24and a lot of things,

00:04:26that if there is a relationship,

00:04:28then how should it be?

00:04:30And how should it be?

00:04:32Or should it be necessary?

00:04:34Or should it be a good personality

00:04:36or should it be a kind,

00:04:40gentle,

00:04:42or should it be a bad thing?

00:04:44So,

00:04:46we will give you a good question,

00:04:48that we will give you a bad word.

00:04:50We will give you the message

00:04:52that we will give you a good question.

00:04:54And we will give you a good question

00:04:56from the starting point.

00:04:58So,

00:04:59we will give you a bad question.

00:05:01Welcome, welcome back, good morning Pakistan.

00:05:23Yes, today we have a lot of guests.

00:05:30We have told them that they should get the proper time.

00:05:33After our last couple of days, our favorite and your favorite is Sabat Gilani.

00:05:41Assalamualaikum.

00:05:42How are you?

00:05:43Exactly Nida.

00:05:44I have said that you have three or four panelists.

00:05:46No, no, I have the pressure that you have given today.

00:05:49It's an unbelievable topic.

00:05:51As always, Nida, it's a great thing in your show.

00:05:54And I'm really happy that it's talking about such topics

00:05:57and the amount of time you say, it's less.

00:05:59Absolutely, it's very important.

00:06:01Because you are a mother of the past,

00:06:05so we will learn something from your parenting.

00:06:09And it's obvious that it's necessary to be an expert

00:06:13so that he can educate us through our education.

00:06:17So here is Rabia Faruqi, Clinical Psychologist.

00:06:21Hello, how are you?

00:06:23Yes, absolutely.

00:06:25So we have some stories that are missing from comparison.

00:06:30When we were young,

00:06:32at that time,

00:06:34who is eating?

00:06:36There were little things,

00:06:38eating, eating, eating, eating,

00:06:40and eating at that time,

00:06:42and eating at that time.

00:06:44So, I don't know,

00:06:45why did these things happen later?

00:06:48Nida, there are a lot of factors.

00:06:51One is a genetic factor.

00:06:53When two children are born in one child,

00:06:58they are genetically different.

00:07:00Secondly, what parents are going through at that time,

00:07:05is a very big factor.

00:07:08Emotionally, where was I when I was born in my life,

00:07:11when I was born in my life,

00:07:12versus emotionally,

00:07:14when I was born in Allah Noor,

00:07:16then where am I?

00:07:17Yes.

00:07:17What is my journey?

00:07:19Yes.

00:07:19What were my weaknesses?

00:07:21What were my fears?

00:07:22What affected me at that time?

00:07:24Today, there are those weaknesses and factors,

00:07:27whether it's fear or not.

00:07:28So, what are my new factors?

00:07:30They will affect Allah Noor.

00:07:32Okay.

00:07:32So, all environmental, social factors,

00:07:35and I'm sure Dr. Sahiba will be able to shed more light on it.

00:07:39But in every house,

00:07:41no two children will not get one like that.

00:07:43No.

00:07:44Should I say,

00:07:44my sister too?

00:07:45No.

00:07:47My mother can tell herself,

00:07:51what is my child,

00:07:52what is it, what is it, what is it, what is it, what is it.

00:07:54It's my mother's three children.

00:07:56If she will know it at the fingertips.

00:07:58Absolutely.

00:07:59Right?

00:08:00Yes.

00:08:00So, what do you say in comparison?

00:08:02That our school of thought,

00:08:04that our parents had the school of thought,

00:08:07that if you compare it,

00:08:09it will be better and better.

00:08:11Look at that, it's so good.

00:08:13Why can't you do that?

00:08:14I mean, like,

00:08:15in the same way, cousins.

00:08:16Look,

00:08:17Nida, like Sarwat has said,

00:08:19that they don't have brothers and sisters.

00:08:21They don't have identical twins.

00:08:22They don't have identical twins.

00:08:24They don't have 100% of them.

00:08:25They don't have two people.

00:08:26They don't have one like that.

00:08:28Now, what you're talking about,

00:08:30that the relationship mindset is,

00:08:32where do you come from?

00:08:33Look,

00:08:34our parents' generation is,

00:08:36they are a generation that is very survival.

00:08:39It means resources are reduced,

00:08:41scarcity are,

00:08:43and a survival mindset is to survive.

00:08:46In the survival mindset,

00:08:47there is a competition.

00:08:49It means that you also need those resources.

00:08:51It is less than two people.

00:08:53It is not possible to be full.

00:08:54So,

00:08:54let's take one from the other side,

00:08:56and take one from the other side.

00:08:57Now,

00:08:57who will be the most competent?

00:09:00What is this?

00:09:01Now,

00:09:01everyone doesn't know.

00:09:02They don't know consciously,

00:09:04they don't know that we are doing this,

00:09:05but it is being done automatically.

00:09:07So,

00:09:08what happens is that,

00:09:09the comparison of the parents started,

00:09:12especially in academics,

00:09:14that the parents started,

00:09:15and that the parents started,

00:09:17and that the parents started,

00:09:19and that the parents started.

00:09:20So,

00:09:20you don't know,

00:09:21you don't like it.

00:09:22You don't like it.

00:09:23What happens is that,

00:09:25naturally,

00:09:26there is a mechanism.

00:09:28One person has a value or worth,

00:09:31and that's how they do it.

00:09:32If we are three sitting here,

00:09:34there is a natural process,

00:09:35which is happening in our mind,

00:09:37that we are comparing ourselves to one another.

00:09:41So,

00:09:42what is the natural process?

00:09:43What happens is that I will see my qualities,

00:09:46some things that I feel others may see that.

00:09:47And I may allow you to take inspiration.

00:09:50Okay?

00:09:51Okay,

00:09:52because they are good at this,

00:09:53so I will also do it like this.

00:09:55So,

00:09:55it will sometimes help us

00:09:56but,

00:09:57and if I are watching each other side,

00:09:58that you have a lack of harm,

00:10:00that you have a lack,

00:10:01that you see a bad thing,

00:10:02you will see,

00:10:03and that you will see it good by yourself.

00:10:06So,

00:10:06I will not see my positive qualities as well.

00:10:09I will only see my negative qualities as well as well,

00:10:12and I think that the other one will be better from me every time.

00:10:17So in a natural process, you have done overwrite this message from outside, especially with parents.

00:10:23Parents, you can understand for children, they are ideal.

00:10:27We have seen that they have said that they are only the last words.

00:10:31If my mother has said that, then yes, we are the same.

00:10:35We are the same. We are the identity.

00:10:38You have said that parents don't come to children.

00:10:42You have shown that you are a duffer.

00:10:45Now that child will become a duffer.

00:10:48Then the child will also be put together.

00:10:50What a good thing.

00:10:52Fear is the worst factor for growth.

00:10:58If we are scared and think that, no, I am not intelligent as a mother.

00:11:09So you have put fear in the first child.

00:11:12Now the confidence level, the self-mukhtariness, the drive, you have shattered.

00:11:20So it's so important that the comparison is not done.

00:11:24And the fear factor.

00:11:26I mean, there are a lot of ways of encouraging your child.

00:11:29Now, as I say, if you read seven books, you will get this game.

00:11:34So what's happening in that?

00:11:36It's encouraging.

00:11:37And I didn't compare it.

00:11:38And secondly, I didn't compare it.

00:11:39I didn't compare it to the failure.

00:11:41You can't do it.

00:11:43You can't do it.

00:11:45You will get it.

00:11:46And vocabulary.

00:11:48You use vocabulary with your child.

00:11:52I am saying that you don't do it.

00:11:55Or I am saying that you can do it.

00:11:58So it's very important that you don't focus on it.

00:12:04Where you want to reach it, where you want to see it,

00:12:07you use that vocabulary.

00:12:10So as Dr. Sahib has said,

00:12:12that the comparison is so important that you put fear.

00:12:15That you can't grow and never get better.

00:12:19Right?

00:12:20Yes, exactly.

00:12:21That's what it is.

00:12:22That fear is so overpowering.

00:12:24That you can't develop your confidence.

00:12:27You don't understand yourself.

00:12:29You always have a sound in your mind.

00:12:31That I can't do it.

00:12:33I can't do it.

00:12:34I can't do it.

00:12:35I can't do it.

00:12:36I can't do it.

00:12:37I can't do it.

00:12:38I can't do it.

00:12:39Now, how to handle it?

00:12:41This is the parents' attitude.

00:12:42If the child has something wrong,

00:12:44the child will do it again.

00:12:46Parents' way of seeing them.

00:12:47You don't have to say anything.

00:12:49Some parents are very stupid.

00:12:51Some parents are critical.

00:12:53Especially fathers.

00:12:54In many homes,

00:12:55they've seen that they are very critical.

00:12:59and after that, the child is saying to her daughter that you have learned this.

00:13:07So, the child thinks that if I am doing something wrong or I am doing,

00:13:12then everything is my mother.

00:13:14And the child is scared that if I have wrong, then I will listen to it.

00:13:19But my mother also needs to listen to it.

00:13:21And at the same time, Nida, we will note that

00:13:25that when the child doesn't see the relationship of the mother's parents,

00:13:31there is an insecurity.

00:13:33And that's exactly how they will treat the mother when the father is not there.

00:13:38So, when the child goes from home to the job,

00:13:41the child's bad attitude or demeaning attitude

00:13:45reflects that as the father treats the baby.

00:13:51That is why we treat the mother.

00:13:53Why?

00:13:54We treat the mother.

00:13:55Yes.

00:13:56We treat the mother.

00:13:57Because the father is also blaming, the society is blaming.

00:14:00Eventually, the child is doing this.

00:14:02It is learning that the mother is the blaming factor.

00:14:05Yes.

00:14:06I have some people who have been in their life

00:14:09and the negative side of the positive side of the negative side of the person.

00:14:15My friends.

00:14:16Yes.

00:14:42we're also reading the time of event.

00:14:47Now, everyone has a clue in the game.

00:14:50It brings us to the team,

00:14:53but the team continues to get us on.

00:14:58When we come home,

00:15:00the teacher has more improve.

00:15:01She says,

00:15:02you do not see,

00:15:03it is reading in the event.

00:15:04Why are you not listening to this?

00:15:06If you don't study this,

00:15:07why are you on this?

00:15:08So every piece of the teacher

00:15:10And I'm very tired in my life. I don't understand what I'm doing.

00:15:16Now my cousin's morning is completely wrong.

00:15:20And that's my enemy.

00:15:22And sometimes I don't think I leave my home.

00:15:25I don't understand what I'm doing.

00:15:27I'm saying that my daughter will get married soon.

00:15:31We'll be busy.

00:15:33Please note that in any audience,

00:15:35no one has been able to study better than I am.

00:15:38But also, a nerd is always the same.

00:15:41That everyone has the same, the older adults.

00:15:44It's the same.

00:15:46So when a child knows that I'm a work of an experiment,

00:15:52he'll be doing this again and he'll be doing it.

00:15:54He'll be doing it.

00:15:56And he'll be doing it.

00:15:58And he'll be doing it.

00:15:59and we will have to leave this kind of situation.

00:16:02Again, the most important responsibility for parents is that if you...

00:16:09Look, a lot of times, now in Ruhan grade 4,

00:16:12there are the first exam exams.

00:16:14And he has given himself this,

00:16:17that I have to do the best.

00:16:20So I have to do the best with Ruhan,

00:16:22and Fahad has also said,

00:16:24we don't want you on the honor roll.

00:16:26You don't want to work with yourself,

00:16:29but your capacity,

00:16:31that you fulfill.

00:16:33Try your best shot. Give it your best shot.

00:16:36That you don't think that you have left a little bit.

00:16:39Parents, it's very necessary to say,

00:16:42that if you fail, it's okay.

00:16:45I will still love you, like my son.

00:16:48If you throw a tantrum,

00:16:50I will love you again.

00:16:52It will be a good day, I will love you.

00:16:54It will be a bad day, I will love you.

00:16:56That sense of achievement,

00:16:58that sense of security,

00:16:59that sense of security,

00:17:00that's all that comes when they know

00:17:02that if we have done something wrong,

00:17:04our mother will not disown us.

00:17:06That's such a huge factor.

00:17:08When they compare their mother's daughter's daughter,

00:17:12then what's happening?

00:17:14They're making their heart,

00:17:15they leave the house and run away.

00:17:16Because they feel that

00:17:17they don't hear their story,

00:17:19they don't understand them.

00:17:21They don't have any hurdles.

00:17:23They don't have any further questions.

00:17:25They don't have any further questions.

00:17:26They don't have any further questions.

00:17:27They don't have any further questions.

00:17:29Why do they love their mother?

00:17:31Because their mother will take a book with them.

00:17:32And a lot of times,

00:17:34mother and father also forget this.

00:17:36That if you want to read your children,

00:17:38then what do you want to read books with them?

00:17:41Do they have seen you?

00:17:42What do they have seen you?

00:17:43What do they have seen their home?

00:17:45Exactly.

00:17:46It's very important.

00:17:48So, what you have to say is that you have to say that you have to go first, and you have to crush the child's personality.

00:18:02It's just for bringing numbers.

00:18:04So, you have to say that you are living in your capacity.

00:18:10That you can do best, but you have to go further.

00:18:16You have to go further.

00:18:18What are you doing?

00:18:19You don't have to sleep.

00:18:21Today, there is depression, suicidal thoughts, bullying.

00:18:27When we were in school, there was no competition.

00:18:32Today's mother-in-law is very hard to update you.

00:18:38That our generational traumas, that you don't have to transmit your children's generational traumas.

00:18:45Like our mother-in-law, Mollie-sahab took care of her.

00:18:49So, we took care of her and took care of her and took care of her.

00:18:52Then, there is a hole, a hole, a hole, a hole, a hole.

00:18:57Today's mother-in-law can't do this.

00:18:59We can't do this.

00:19:00We can't do this.

00:19:01We can't do this.

00:19:02We can't do this.

00:19:03So, it's a different system.

00:19:04It's different.

00:19:05It's different.

00:19:06It's different.

00:19:07And it's different.

00:19:08And it's different to every mother-in-law to upgrade your first generation.

00:19:12A lot of times, I remember, I don't know if you remember, but I was doing art classes during COVID.

00:19:18Yes, yes.

00:19:19Right?

00:19:20Because there was no editing in art classes.

00:19:22And there was a lot of times something strange and strange thing.

00:19:25So, I asked my mother-in-law if you don't want to be angry.

00:19:28If you have a camera, you have to sit down.

00:19:30That's not how it should be done.

00:19:33A lot of times, we say, we need to talk to children with children.

00:19:37Actually, we need to talk to children with children.

00:19:40Exactly.

00:19:41They also have power.

00:19:42They have power.

00:19:43They have power.

00:19:44They have power.

00:19:45They have power.

00:19:46They have power.

00:19:47Why do we forget?

00:19:48Well, at the time, the mother-in-law is sitting there.

00:19:53They have power.

00:19:54What are they doing?

00:19:55That's it.

00:19:56But now, we can't do that with children.

00:19:58If we say something in front of everyone.

00:20:00Then, the children feel their insults.

00:20:03They feel their insults.

00:20:05That they are going to insult themselves.

00:20:07So, this is the understanding of children.

00:20:09Okay, Nida.

00:20:10I will highlight one thing in this case.

00:20:12That is the child who has written books in every event.

00:20:15One of the things.

00:20:16Yes, the children are working in every, the mother-in-law.

00:20:18But it is also going to be done for history.

00:20:19It is not happening for children.

00:20:20Events are not happening for books.

00:20:21Events are socially Doesn't happen for socialize.

00:20:22It is happening for events.

00:20:23They are enjoying it.

00:20:24It is going to be done for them.

00:20:25So, you understand, that there will also be pressure on every time.

00:20:26And the kids also will have feeling that the kids are still making their value.

00:20:27They will also feel that, that my books are not there.

00:20:28that my value is only because of the books, so my value as a person is finished.

00:20:34Okay.

00:20:35So this process is also going on.

00:20:36Now their mother is also going on, their child is going on in the same way,

00:20:40that their child is going on in the same way.

00:20:42So these parents need to understand that each one's strengths are different.

00:20:46If you look at that child, she might be socially in-appted.

00:20:50She doesn't have social skills.

00:20:52Your child's social skills are good.

00:20:54You take that strength and motivate her.

00:20:57If you look at that child, how do you do this job?

00:20:59How do you do this job?

00:21:01How do we do this job here?

00:21:02I remember when my mother said, don't make a book,

00:21:06make a whole personality.

00:21:08If you read the book, how do you do the execution in your life?

00:21:12Absolutely.

00:21:13If you talk to someone with a book,

00:21:16it's a good number of exams,

00:21:18but there are so many people who are so good.

00:21:21My colleagues, my class fellows,

00:21:24took a lot of numbers in the class,

00:21:26but in the life,

00:21:27they don't have good numbers.

00:21:29In the sense that in the practical life,

00:21:31they can't become anything.

00:21:33Until there,

00:21:34they kept it and killed them.

00:21:36They took good numbers.

00:21:37But basically,

00:21:38we have to build our children's personality.

00:21:41They have to build their personality.

00:21:43They are not only books and reports.

00:21:46Today,

00:21:47it can be so little viral,

00:21:49that you're taking degrees,

00:21:52it's not in the work,

00:21:53it's skills as in the work.

00:21:54That's why the students say,

00:21:55you are a complete school in itself.

00:21:58itself. And that's what parents take from the parents, academics and sibling rivalry.

00:22:07There is a lot of times that when you have a comparison within your children, then within

00:22:13themselves there are so many rivalries that happen. And that's what happens.

00:22:20And that's what happens. And that's what happens. And that's what happens.

00:22:32After a break, we'll come back to you and tell us that if there is a competition,

00:22:37then it should be different in today and tomorrow. Every time, every thing is different.

00:22:43Good morning.

00:22:50Welcome. Welcome back. Good morning.

00:22:53Pakistan.

00:22:54Today we're talking about competition.

00:22:56We're talking about cousins, cousins, cousins and sisters.

00:23:02And after that, their relationships are so bad.

00:23:07They don't have love or love.

00:23:10They don't have jealousy.

00:23:12They don't have jealousy.

00:23:13They don't have a desire.

00:23:15They don't have a desire.

00:23:17They don't have a desire.

00:23:19They have two families of their family.

00:23:22They willματα, who have the system, they will have a desire.

00:23:26They will have коerled, who have gone.

00:23:27So now we've talked about this segment before.

00:23:30One girl, who was compared to her, was going on to her brother,

00:23:36let's go to the other side.

00:23:37Who is my family at this time?

00:23:38Aman.

00:23:39As-salamu alaykum, Aman.

00:23:40Welcome, Salam.

00:23:42Yes, Aman.

00:23:43What do you want to say?

00:23:44Yes, my biggest problem is that I have to lose less.

00:23:48My parents always say, what do you have to lose?

00:23:52Look at how much he has to lose.

00:23:55They say that when he has a big brother in your age,

00:23:58he has to lose more than you.

00:24:02So what is happening with you?

00:24:04I mean, this is a very difficult thing to listen to

00:24:09and say, what do I have to lose?

00:24:11I have to sit with my parents.

00:24:14That's why.

00:24:15I have to leave with my friends

00:24:18so that when I sleep, I will come back.

00:24:20So that they don't have to lose me.

00:24:24That's right.

00:24:25These are the stories of their lives.

00:24:28These are the stories of many girls.

00:24:30Absolutely.

00:24:31They say that they are sitting in our house.

00:24:33So it's the only reason for that.

00:24:35That they will listen so much.

00:24:37Yes.

00:24:38That if they sit, then they will give them to them.

00:24:42So no one should be sitting with them.

00:24:45They will highlight their faults in their faces.

00:24:48Now, if they have a problem,

00:24:50it's a very practical solution that you find out

00:24:53that if there is an issue of income,

00:24:55then what is the reason?

00:24:56Where is it?

00:24:57And what is the solution?

00:24:58How can it increase your income?

00:25:00How can it increase your income?

00:25:02Besides that,

00:25:03you tell them how much it is.

00:25:05How much it is.

00:25:06How much it is.

00:25:07How much it is.

00:25:08How much it is.

00:25:09How much it is.

00:25:10I have seen a lot of parents

00:25:11who have lost their children.

00:25:13For example,

00:25:14they give them the same positive.

00:25:16Like,

00:25:17they have married their children themselves.

00:25:19They support them.

00:25:21They support them.

00:25:22They support their children.

00:25:23They support them.

00:25:24I mean,

00:25:25they support them.

00:25:26Like,

00:25:27they support them too.

00:25:28You need to help them.

00:25:29They support them too.

00:25:30And they help them.

00:25:31Having some help,

00:25:32they support them too.

00:25:33They support those.

00:25:34And then,

00:25:35they just find out,

00:25:36if it's not yet negative,

00:25:38then,

00:25:39how much it is?

00:25:40So in their chances,

00:25:42what is less businesses?

00:25:43A few things are not compared to them.

00:25:44So what can you do?

00:25:46There is a lot of things that you can find and try to solve the problem.

00:25:52What is happening with your brother?

00:25:54How much is it going to be affected with your brother?

00:25:56Then they are going to be away from the family.

00:25:58And the problem is there.

00:26:00You are making their identity of a person.

00:26:03So what do you do?

00:26:05It's the job that he won't earn or will lose.

00:26:09He is getting a lot of the behavior.

00:26:11You encourage them to see how much it can happen.

00:26:16Let's try and try and try and if it's not, you can play a supportive role.

00:26:20So, people don't think that they can solve problems.

00:26:23Instead of having to feel that this is a problem.

00:26:28And everyone can get together.

00:26:30No one can get in the house.

00:26:32And Nida, you can see here, that there is a head of the family or a man of the house.

00:26:40What is the responsibility of his family?

00:26:45Now, Ahmed has said that his father is very vocal.

00:26:49He has a very demeaning feeling.

00:26:55As a father, he is not doing justice to his role.

00:26:59Because father doesn't mean that if you have provided your children financially,

00:27:05you are a good father.

00:27:07Fatherhood means that you have to meet your children with your children.

00:27:14Emotionally, socially and financially.

00:27:18So, if a father is and I can imagine that his father, whose father ispeat, he must be in his 30s.

00:27:26His father is in his 60s.

00:27:28The generation of old men is the only one who is the parent.

00:27:31There is a child in his 60s.

00:27:35and that's what they said to them.

00:27:40And they said to them,

00:27:42like in the 1960s,

00:27:45when they were parents,

00:27:48they were born in the 1960s,

00:27:51and they were born in the 21st century.

00:27:56So this is so wrong.

00:27:58Again, that's the vocabulary.

00:28:00If the uncle is Ahmed's son,

00:28:03if they use a healthy competition

00:28:06or a healthy vocabulary

00:28:08using Ahmed's comparison,

00:28:10then Ahmed doesn't feel so bad.

00:28:13So it's so important that

00:28:15you have to be removed from your mouth.

00:28:17Mr. Ali's call is

00:28:19Half the battle is won,

00:28:21by the way you speak.

00:28:23So you, who are the children,

00:28:25and they are the young people,

00:28:27they have a self-respect in their home,

00:28:29they have a self-respect,

00:28:31their brothers and sisters,

00:28:33and their spouses,

00:28:34they will be standing in front of them.

00:28:36They will be standing in front of them,

00:28:38and they will say,

00:28:40you don't want to lose.

00:28:41So obviously,

00:28:42why do they want to live in their home?

00:28:44Yes.

00:28:45So again,

00:28:46whether you are the same,

00:28:47as you are the same,

00:28:48a good change is a very important change.

00:28:52So if you have the situation of generation,

00:28:54you have the same thing,

00:28:55you have the same thing,

00:28:56you have the same thing,

00:28:57then please,

00:28:58you have the same way,

00:28:59you have to remember that.

00:29:01Yes, absolutely.

00:29:02You are right, Ahmed?

00:29:04Is that right now?

00:29:06Is that right?

00:29:07Is that right?

00:29:08No, I didn't have the same marriage.

00:29:10Because a lot of children,

00:29:12they have suffered from people.

00:29:15And I can't afford their children.

00:29:17So if you have the same marriage,

00:29:19that's right,

00:29:20that you have to work with their little child.

00:29:21And to help them,

00:29:23they will be able to live for their child.

00:29:25If the children can give their children,

00:29:26they have their children.

00:29:27They will be able to bear their children.

00:29:28respectful but he also needs to bear the same thing that Ahmad is bear

00:29:34so now this is the second thing

00:29:37but if we can give him a advice

00:29:41I know that in many families there are family counselling

00:29:46in which everyone knows a state of mental state

00:29:51a lot of families are not open for therapy

00:29:55they say that we are crazy

00:29:57I don't like that

00:29:59I don't like that

00:30:01but Ahmad, you can find the counselling for yourself

00:30:06because when it is toxic environment

00:30:09it is in survival mode

00:30:13and there is a thin line that you cross

00:30:17you say that I want to finish it

00:30:19I want to run away from home

00:30:21I want to finish this relationship

00:30:23when you reach that place

00:30:25before you reach your mental health

00:30:27you can favor your mental health

00:30:29if you are in toxic environment

00:30:32then you can create your boundaries

00:30:36because you have to survive

00:30:38you have to survive

00:30:40or counselling

00:30:42you have to define your boundaries

00:30:44you have to define your boundaries

00:30:46so it is very important

00:30:48you have to say that

00:30:50that you have to tell your parents

00:30:52that you have to do wrong

00:30:54because you have to do wrong

00:30:56because you have to do wrong

00:30:58you have to do wrong

00:30:59and if you are in the age

00:31:01they say that the world is wrong

00:31:03then you cannot explain it

00:31:05you cannot explain it

00:31:07you cannot explain it

00:31:09so do your counselling

00:31:11and mental health

00:31:12do your mental health

00:31:13that what they are saying

00:31:15don't affect you

00:31:17what is happening right now

00:31:19absolutely

00:31:20okay

00:31:21now

00:31:22I want to say something

00:31:23we have to conclude

00:31:24with this

00:31:25I amad

00:31:26yes

00:31:27welcome

00:31:28welcome

00:31:29yes

00:31:30welcome

00:31:31my wife has been five years

00:31:32I have been so much

00:31:34in five years

00:31:35that you cannot think

00:31:37my husband

00:31:38just compare me to someone's wife

00:31:40oh my god

00:31:41friends

00:31:42relatives

00:31:43just this

00:31:45they are comparing me to someone's wife

00:31:47just this

00:31:48if I want to make a meal

00:31:49then I will eat

00:31:50and I will say

00:31:51how good she makes a meal

00:31:52so why don't you take the recipe

00:31:53to me

00:31:54or if we have to go

00:31:55somewhere

00:31:56and I am ready

00:31:57then see

00:31:58her daughter's wife

00:31:59has a good dressing sense

00:32:00so go to her

00:32:01go to her

00:32:02and go to her

00:32:03sometimes

00:32:04we are in a toxic place

00:32:05sometimes

00:32:06sometimes

00:32:07I am a human

00:32:08sometimes

00:32:09sometimes

00:32:10I am a human

00:32:11sometimes

00:32:12I am a human

00:32:13sometimes

00:32:14and say

00:32:16I am a human

00:32:17you

00:32:22watch

00:32:23then

00:32:24I will not wait

00:32:25just

00:32:26it is

00:32:27it is

00:32:28that

00:32:29it is

00:32:30that

00:32:31it is

00:32:32like

00:32:33if

00:32:34someone

00:32:35comes to an event

00:32:36without the idea of

00:32:38She will focus on her baby and then her baby will give her baby's ideas.

00:32:42Now, how has it happened to me mentally, I am so tortured.

00:32:46I feel like the baby's baby's baby and the sweeper in the building,

00:32:50her wife will probably be better with me.

00:32:53Oh, I don't understand.

00:32:55When there is such an environment...

00:32:57I'm sorry, I remember her name.

00:32:59Amna, Amna.

00:33:01Amna, again, very toxic environment,

00:33:05mentality toxic, vocabulary toxic.

00:33:08Thoughts, wisdom, life, all the trickle down,

00:33:12this venom is so bad for their self-esteem.

00:33:16You think so bad.

00:33:18And our religion also says that don't compare.

00:33:22And if you are giving one hand, then you don't have to know what to do.

00:33:26So all the things that our religion teaches,

00:33:29they teach for these people.

00:33:31Again, Amna, I would suggest that

00:33:33that there are some scholars who talk for couples,

00:33:38you listen to them around.

00:33:41They don't listen to them.

00:33:42They don't listen to them.

00:33:43They don't listen to them.

00:33:44They don't listen to them.

00:33:45You listen to them.

00:33:46And as many of the people who have their names,

00:33:50they share them.

00:33:52So as a community,

00:33:54you don't tell them,

00:33:56that I'm doing this for my mother.

00:33:59But if you have that thing in the house,

00:34:02and if they are a little self-conscious,

00:34:06then they will listen to them.

00:34:08Because a lot of times,

00:34:09what happens is that

00:34:10I will say to my mother,

00:34:12it will not look good.

00:34:13My mother will say to her,

00:34:15it will not look good.

00:34:16If she will listen to a third person,

00:34:18you are right.

00:34:19So she will understand the story,

00:34:21and she will sit in his mouth.

00:34:23Another thing.

00:34:25Have you ever told this to your husband,

00:34:27when they compare you to your husband?

00:34:32Because it is necessary to tell you.

00:34:34The other person doesn't understand

00:34:36that what I'm doing is hurting.

00:34:38The other person is hurting.

00:34:39Have you ever told me?

00:34:40I've tried to discuss it a lot.

00:34:42But I feel like they have a habit from their childhood.

00:34:45I don't know.

00:34:46I don't know.

00:34:47I don't know.

00:34:48They understand a little bit.

00:34:50But then it's the same thing,

00:34:51that they compare me to someone again.

00:34:54Because they should know.

00:34:56Yes.

00:34:57How do they feel?

00:34:58How do they feel?

00:34:59How do they feel?

00:35:00How do they feel?

00:35:01How do they feel?

00:35:02How do they feel?

00:35:03How do they feel?

00:35:04Okay.

00:35:05Anidha,

00:35:06we are talking about parents.

00:35:07Parents don't need to be controlling behavior.

00:35:10They have fear.

00:35:11They are afraid.

00:35:12They are afraid,

00:35:13that they will get out of the race.

00:35:14That is the fear.

00:35:15They put their children in their children.

00:35:16But after spouses,

00:35:17this behavior is used to be controlled.

00:35:20Yes.

00:35:21That they stay in my custody.

00:35:22That they stay in my custody.

00:35:23How do they stay in custody?

00:35:24How do they feel?

00:35:25How do they feel?

00:35:26Self-esteem.

00:35:27Self-esteem.

00:35:28Yes.

00:35:29So now,

00:35:29this behavior,

00:35:30if it is being controlled for them,

00:35:32then they will know consciously.

00:35:35This is a strategy.

00:35:36They are not automatically,

00:35:38and not doing it.

00:35:40So now,

00:35:40this person to deal with it is tricky.

00:35:43Okay.

00:35:44So now,

00:35:44you need to share your feelings with them.

00:35:47Okay.

00:35:48The other thing is,

00:35:49that you are telling them,

00:35:50that you are telling them,

00:35:51that sometimes,

00:35:52you are not very aggressive,

00:35:53but simply,

00:35:54let them compare.

00:35:55And just see,

00:35:56note his reaction.

00:35:57It is not a comparison.

00:35:58It is not a comparison.

00:35:59It is not a comparison.

00:36:00It is not a comparison.

00:36:01It is not a comparison.

00:36:02It is not a comparison.

00:36:03It is not a comparison.

00:36:04It is not a comparison.

00:36:05And you have once said,

00:36:06that the person's ego,

00:36:07that it feels like this.

00:36:08That is why,

00:36:09you have to note that.

00:36:10If it is not a reaction,

00:36:11then this is not the way to go.

00:36:13This will be a loss for them.

00:36:15So,

00:36:16it is good for them.

00:36:17I think you should try and error.

00:36:19First,

00:36:20let's dialogue.

00:36:21I don't like your expression.

00:36:22What you say.

00:36:23And if it is not,

00:36:25then it will be another attempt.

00:36:27Then,

00:36:28I will tell you.

00:36:29that,

00:36:30this,

00:36:31what I am telling you,

00:36:32that their mother's attitude,

00:36:34it is a very narcissistic attitude.

00:36:36Yes.

00:36:37Yes.

00:36:38And narcissistic,

00:36:39they are very high,

00:36:41that we are the best.

00:36:43Yes.

00:36:44So,

00:36:45the next spouse,

00:36:46or partner,

00:36:47or family,

00:36:48or other people,

00:36:49they cannot match that level.

00:36:51No.

00:36:52So,

00:36:53if their understanding is,

00:36:55that my sister is,

00:36:56what I am saying.

00:36:57Hero syndrome,

00:36:58is a word,

00:36:59which is very important.

00:37:00And this is,

00:37:01that everyone needs to know.

00:37:02What is it?

00:37:03Hero syndrome,

00:37:04Nida,

00:37:05when a male person,

00:37:09this feeling,

00:37:10that I am a hero.

00:37:12I have saved you.

00:37:14I am the savior.

00:37:15So,

00:37:16I am the savior.

00:37:17So,

00:37:18if,

00:37:19Amna,

00:37:20if,

00:37:21vocabulary,

00:37:22intelligent,

00:37:23use it,

00:37:24and,

00:37:25say,

00:37:26for example,

00:37:27that he has never compared.

00:37:31He is such a good husband.

00:37:33Okay?

00:37:34Or,

00:37:35if you haven't compared me today,

00:37:37how much you look good today.

00:37:38You look good today.

00:37:39You look good today.

00:37:40You look good today.

00:37:41You look good today.

00:37:42You look good today.

00:37:43You look good today.

00:37:44You look good today.

00:37:45You have given me a happy today.

00:37:46Yes.

00:37:47So,

00:37:48that sort of positive reinforcement.

00:37:50You learn from the way that you learn.

00:37:52Yes.

00:37:53Yeah.

00:37:54That's a very important thing.

00:37:56Evet.

00:37:57That is very important.

00:37:58Yes.

00:37:59So,

00:38:00whenever you do it.

00:38:02You use it to prevent it.

00:38:04When you don't compare it,

00:38:06once again,

00:38:07You have saved that.

00:38:08Yes.

00:38:09And you are my savior.

00:38:10Yes.

00:38:11Today,

00:38:12You are my best hero.

00:38:14Yes.

00:38:15When a man,

00:38:16a man,

00:38:17when he feels like,

00:38:18Oh my God,

00:38:19I have saved something.

00:38:20I am actually right.

00:38:21Yes.

00:38:22I am the best.

00:38:23Sometimes there is a positive reinforcement.

00:38:26Yes.

00:38:27And so people need appreciation and admiration.

00:38:29Yes.

00:38:30Narcissists.

00:38:31Yes.

00:38:32So you can put it a little bit of a mess.

00:38:34Yes.

00:38:35And then those things that you want for yourself,

00:38:38they will encourage them.

00:38:39So that that behavior will reinforce them.

00:38:42That they will get a lot of praise and admire them.

00:38:45Yes.

00:38:46And even people also do that.

00:38:48They are so good.

00:38:49They are so good.

00:38:50Yes.

00:38:52I have no idea.

00:38:53Yes.

00:38:54They are so good.

00:38:55Now they do it.

00:38:56Yes.

00:38:57Now they do it.

00:38:58Yes.

00:38:59Now they do it.

00:39:00They give me a very good guide.

00:39:01They give me a really good support.

00:39:03And they are not doing it.

00:39:04So that the behavior will be reinforced.

00:39:07Another thing,

00:39:08is that your own behavior will be recognised.

00:39:10I am going to buy it while buying it at home.

00:39:12Hero syndrome.

00:39:13emotionally detached

00:39:15you can understand that if you are saying it

00:39:18you compare it

00:39:19the purpose of you is to low feel

00:39:21you will show you

00:39:23you will make your mouth

00:39:25your eyes will come out

00:39:27you will go out

00:39:28you will do so much

00:39:30you will have to show you

00:39:33you will have to listen to one another

00:39:35you will not have a difference

00:39:36so then you will leave this behavior

00:39:38one way you will reinforce the positive behavior

00:39:41one way you will control your reactions

00:39:44show him you don't care

00:39:45we have taught you a lot of good studies

00:39:46now we are going to break

00:39:47there is also jealousy factor

00:39:49within spouses there is also jealousy factor

00:39:52seriously

00:39:52this is also a great factor

00:39:54after a break we will discuss it

00:39:55good morning

00:39:56welcome welcome back

00:40:04good morning pakistan

00:40:06so our previous one

00:40:08was left with the point

00:40:10spouse is jealous

00:40:12so you will give it to you

00:40:13this girl

00:40:14headline

00:40:15it is very important to understand that

00:40:18human psyche

00:40:18it is not that if you are a person

00:40:22then there will not be jealousy in your body

00:40:24human psyche is normal for everyone

00:40:28so spouses also have jealousy

00:40:30and one then

00:40:32we have talked about

00:40:33this

00:40:33that also

00:40:34good morning

00:40:35you are not

00:40:35that if you are a person

00:40:36that has had to look so cool

00:40:37to know how I feel

00:40:39that they feel so good

00:40:39groomed

00:40:40then it is very necessary

00:40:41that we have talked

00:40:42in a lot of times

00:40:43that we have talked about

00:40:44that we have been tired

00:40:44of the first year

00:40:44that we are crying

00:40:45that we have said

00:40:46that we have spoken otro

00:40:47in the house, in the kitchen, in the kitchen, in the kitchen, in the kitchen, in the kitchen.

00:40:53And basic hygiene that we have to let go after a few years. But it is very necessary.

00:41:00Like Pahad comes to the house, I have seen this example.

00:41:04Pahad is looking at beauty and beauty and beauty.

00:41:08So when you think that he will come back to the house, and he will have a bad sister in the house,

00:41:12then who wants to talk about that?

00:41:16So it is very important that you become a queen and groom yourself.

00:41:21Before coming to the house, these are not the things that are actually the things that you have to do with life.

00:41:29Be prepared, wear your clothes, put a little kajal, put a little lipstick,

00:41:35then it is very presentable.

00:41:37So that you will be able to keep a visual pleasure for Mia.

00:41:41And not just Mia.

00:41:43Your children deserve to be able to see a groomed mother in school,

00:41:48and a groomed mother in the house.

00:41:50So you also have to work on yourself.

00:41:52You know.

00:41:53The children are also learning.

00:41:55You see, the children, especially, fathers don't learn so much.

00:41:58The children are very well-groomed.

00:42:01They are very presentable.

00:42:02They are very presentable.

00:42:03They are very presentable.

00:42:04You see, the children also have the styling sense, dressing sense, and grooming.

00:42:06They are very good as compared to women,

00:42:08who don't think much about their children.

00:42:10They don't come to their children.

00:42:11Well, women are prepared.

00:42:13But why do they look so bad at home at home?

00:42:16Tell me.

00:42:17This is a very difficult task.

00:42:21A lot of times, I have to ask Fahad,

00:42:24because there are so many people in the house.

00:42:26You know.

00:42:27But they say,

00:42:28My house is my house.

00:42:29Relax.

00:42:30So what do I do now?

00:42:31They told me.

00:42:32They told me.

00:42:33It was a very good tip.

00:42:34They said,

00:42:35Look, you have to create an environment like this.

00:42:38So if you constantly say,

00:42:41Let me change this,

00:42:42Let me change this.

00:42:43You say,

00:42:44No.

00:42:45You leave it.

00:42:46So when you leave it,

00:42:47it will be visually appealing.

00:42:49And I kid you not, Nida.

00:42:51It has worked.

00:42:52I don't say Fahad.

00:42:54Fahad, put it on the clothes.

00:42:56When they go to the washroom or whatever.

00:42:59To freshen up.

00:43:00He will see those clothes.

00:43:01And wear them.

00:43:02Because people understand logic.

00:43:05Compassion or feelings don't understand.

00:43:08So you play logic with them.

00:43:11And also very important book to read.

00:43:13Men are from Mars.

00:43:15Women are from Venus.

00:43:17This is a very Bible.

00:43:19For relationships.

00:43:21It's a very old book.

00:43:23There are many years and years of covers.

00:43:26What do you do?

00:43:27But I don't know.

00:43:28What is it?

00:43:29But you understand it.

00:43:30Whether you are in a relationship.

00:43:31Whether you are in a relationship.

00:43:32Whether you are going to be a relationship.

00:43:34Whether you are going to be a relationship.

00:43:36This book is a must.

00:43:38So that you will be able to read.

00:43:40And that you'll be able to read.

00:43:41And be able to read.

00:43:42That your lips will not get fed up.

00:43:44But when you are talking about logic.

00:43:46So that you will be able to read it.

00:43:47It will not be able to read them.

00:43:49So it doesn't mean that they do not love you.

00:43:51Because women are emotional beings.

00:43:53Men are logical beings.

00:43:55logical beings. So if they don't match your emotions, it doesn't mean they don't love you.

00:44:01They don't have to do this. They don't have to do this. You know, they have to do different material.

00:44:07So you have to explore that material first.

00:44:10I would say that people will study so that they can understand what they have to do.

00:44:15They need to understand what they have to do. They need to understand what they have to do.

00:44:18They need to understand what they have to do.

00:44:26Next, Vajiya, Assalamu alaikum.

00:44:30Vajiya has called on the show and thought that they can become part of this.

00:44:38Vajiya, Assalamu alaikum.

00:44:40Assalamu alaikum.

00:44:42Vajiya what do you think?

00:44:44Vajiya, I want to share with you.

00:44:47For me, the hurt is that I share this.

00:44:49But it is necessary to do it.

00:44:51They are talking about me.

00:44:52I am talking about my own right now.

00:44:55I am talking about my own right now.

00:44:58My son is very young.

00:45:00His son has an 3 years old.

00:45:02He's not feeling at this age.

00:45:05But I am feeling a lot.

00:45:07That's why I and my husband are very smart, but my child is also our own.

00:45:17When I was young, I was a little healthy, but now my parents go to my parents.

00:45:23My mother says that she is so small, she is very small.

00:45:29Look at her brother's child, she is a little older, but she is a big.

00:45:33She is so healthy.

00:45:35It's a lot of families, especially when you are living under one roof.

00:45:41Then you have to be aware of that.

00:45:44She has so much conscious that she is not a very good fit.

00:45:49She doesn't suit the shirt.

00:45:51It feels really bad that she doesn't wear it.

00:45:54Now, I always think it is that my heart does it to your child.

00:45:58I always wear a shirt like this.

00:46:00I wear a shirt like this.

00:46:03I don't have to be able to make something that I'm going to say.

00:46:09I'm not going to be able to make my heart.

00:46:11I don't want to be able to make my heart a lot.

00:46:13I've always had to eat and drink.

00:46:15My daughter is only six months.

00:46:17She's only six months.

00:46:19She's also been a little bit of a color.

00:46:24She's a little bit of a color.

00:46:26She's been a little bit of a color.

00:46:28She's been a little bit of a color.

00:46:30If this is the only thing that happens, I feel bad

00:46:33So this is your mother, you can say it

00:46:35If you don't feel your mother, you can say everything

00:46:40I am saying it, but I have said it directly and indirectly

00:46:46I have said it very often, but the problem is that there are other children

00:46:50If the other child is saying that she has said it, she has said it

00:46:56She has said it, but she has said it, she has said it

00:47:03She has said it and said it, and she has said it

00:47:06Then I can't leave her mother

00:47:08And because of the fact that we have a lot of a lot of children

00:47:13Our husband and wife doesn't have any children

00:47:15But as a mother, we start to have a lot of children

00:47:20Because my child is trying to do 3 years

00:47:25And she has a little bit of manners

00:47:27Don't say it, I don't say anything about the children

00:47:30I don't say anything about the children

00:47:32We also talk about the children

00:47:33So they don't keep them in the middle

00:47:34If there is a big deal of things in the house

00:47:36Or a mother, they also have to play them

00:47:38I don't know if they are busy

00:47:40And they are busy

00:47:41If they are talking about the children

00:47:43If they are talking about the children

00:47:44Or they are doing something

00:47:46They are appreciating them

00:47:47They are very comfortable

00:47:48And they are so happy

00:47:49And you are so comfortable

00:47:50And that is so comfortable

00:47:51They are so comfortable

00:47:52But they are getting to have some

00:47:54And my children are saying it

00:47:56They are a boss

00:47:57They are not saying it

00:47:58They are a duffer

00:47:59They are very comfortable

00:48:00I don't understand what to do

00:48:02I don't understand what I will do.

00:48:04We can't leave our families.

00:48:07This is all very relatable.

00:48:09There are so many people.

00:48:12I will give you practical tips.

00:48:15I understand that it is very difficult.

00:48:20But you can reframe your thoughts.

00:48:24If your mother is saying,

00:48:26don't think that she has a problem with me.

00:48:29It is not a problem with me.

00:48:32Your mother is saying,

00:48:34the warning is very strange and toxic,

00:48:38but it is not a concern.

00:48:41If you think about this,

00:48:43you can develop empathy for them.

00:48:45The second thing is that

00:48:47you are a protector of your child.

00:48:50Your mother is not.

00:48:52The trauma that they have learned,

00:48:54they are doing that.

00:48:56You need to make boundaries.

00:48:58Boundary means that whatever they are saying, you can't change them, but you have to reduce your response.

00:49:05Like you said, your child is a duffer, you don't say it, you don't say it, you don't say it, you don't say it, you don't say it, you don't say it.

00:49:12You change that message quickly.

00:49:14No, my child is a child.

00:49:16And that's where your child is.

00:49:19Appreciate it.

00:49:20She says this 10 times, you repeat this 11 times without showing any aggression towards your mother.

00:49:28Okay.

00:49:29When you love your child, repeat that same thing.

00:49:31Like you repeat it, you also say, you repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat.

00:49:36What do you think of your mother?

00:49:39Don't think that she will understand.

00:49:41Boundary.

00:49:42Don't respond.

00:49:43Don't respond.

00:49:44Don't respond.

00:49:49but don't say it like that.

00:49:52I have a grief and my children have a wrong effect.

00:49:55Now they will say something like that,

00:49:58yes, I understand your story, but don't do it like that.

00:50:02Yes, I understand you, but don't do it like that.

00:50:05And then the amount of things they do, don't respond.

00:50:10That's what I'm saying.

00:50:13The comparison of food is in every place,

00:50:16in every place, in every home.

00:50:19When I was a very young mother,

00:50:22when my child was born there,

00:50:24because we were all together,

00:50:26so I went to my mother and cried.

00:50:30What can I do to my child?

00:50:32The milestones were all normal,

00:50:35but in other children,

00:50:37it wasn't so bad.

00:50:39Every child doesn't have bad bad.

00:50:41My mother told me that

00:50:43it doesn't have bad bad bad.

00:50:45what does her child need to be?

00:50:47Is she not yet,

00:50:48is she not yet,

00:50:49is she not yet,

00:50:50is she not yet,

00:50:51is she not yet,

00:50:52did she do it,

00:50:53is she not yet normal?

00:50:55She was a child.

00:50:57Now,

00:50:58it's some changes when parents will also be distracted.

00:51:00I think there are 3-4 things, Lida, which I know from their stories.

00:51:28To begin with, it's very important to study yourself, research yourself,

00:51:38whether it's okay for your child or not.

00:51:42Because if you are unaware of yourself,

00:51:46then whatever you are saying will take you inside.

00:51:51Because you don't know yourself.

00:51:54If someone says something something,

00:51:56then you don't have any information about it.

00:51:58That if it's really your child or your skin,

00:52:01it's healthy or not.

00:52:03If you know yourself,

00:52:05then you don't hit that.

00:52:08Secondly, there is an expiry date to blaming parents.

00:52:12Very, very important.

00:52:14Your parents have seen their generational trauma.

00:52:18They are still on their journey.

00:52:20Perhaps their mother was talking about it.

00:52:23That's why they are talking about it today.

00:52:26But one way to break generational trauma is to accept her for who she is.

00:52:33As Dr. Sahib has said,

00:52:35it's a very important thing.

00:52:37That their way is wrong,

00:52:39but their intention is good.

00:52:41So you don't forget what they said and why they said,

00:52:45and in their heart it was this and that.

00:52:47You accept that they know so much.

00:52:50They are the same vocabulary.

00:52:52They are the same mindset.

00:52:54I can't change it.

00:52:56But I can change it.

00:52:57But I can change it.

00:52:58Secondly,

00:53:00very important to understand is

00:53:02that in one house,

00:53:04you can co-exist on two different things.

00:53:08One thing is that

00:53:10you welcome your mother

00:53:13that your opinion counts.

00:53:16But at the same time,

00:53:18you can draw your boundary

00:53:20that that opinion will affect how much.

00:53:23you affect.

00:53:24Right?

00:53:25So two things are co-exist.

00:53:26One thing is that

00:53:28one thing is that

00:53:29love

00:53:30and that

00:53:31do not appeal to other people.

00:53:34It's okay.

00:53:35You are getting love.

00:53:36You are getting attention from one side.

00:53:38But at the same time,

00:53:40that attention and love

00:53:42can be toxic.

00:53:44So this is also co-exist.

00:53:46In one house.

00:53:47So a lot of times,

00:53:48things will co-exist.

00:53:50You don't want to do

00:53:52with your mother.

00:53:54But at the same time,

00:53:55you will stand for your child.

00:53:58It is co-exist.

00:53:59In one house.

00:54:00Yes.

00:54:01So very important to understand

00:54:03that the boundary

00:54:05you will make.

00:54:06The boundary you don't respect.

00:54:08The boundary you don't respect.

00:54:09The boundary you don't respect.

00:54:10That boundary you don't respect.

00:54:11No one respect.

00:54:12Yes.

00:54:13So as Dr. Sahib has said,

00:54:15that if he compares you to your child,

00:54:17he says,

00:54:18he says,

00:54:19he says,

00:54:20he says,

00:54:21he doesn't affect what he does.

00:54:22You do not affect him

00:54:23If you don't affect it,

00:54:24you will be well aware.

00:54:26You will know,

00:54:27that it is a toxic environment.

00:54:30This is toxic comment.

00:54:31You will know,

00:54:32that it is toxic.

00:54:33that is okay.

00:54:34Let it go.

00:54:35Let it go.

00:54:36If you don't reach the message, you change the message.

00:54:39The child will take your story.

00:54:41You are the mother.

00:54:42Your mother is not the mother.

00:54:44You change the message that your child is handsome, smart and healthy.

00:54:49And healthy.

00:54:50And I don't know, I don't want to say anything like this.

00:54:55But when the child is bedridden, they have many diseases.

00:54:59They are chit-chit.

00:55:01And because of that chit-chit-chit, the child gets hurt.

00:55:08They are cynical.

00:55:09So we need to think about this.

00:55:12If they are where we are and we are dead, then we are chit-chit-chit.

00:55:17So in that chit-chit-chit, there are many vocabulary that they don't need to do.

00:55:23Do you need to do it?

00:55:24So we need to take the same steps.

00:55:25And you can then wear yourself, and then, yes.

00:55:27Yeah.

00:55:28And then, yeah.

00:55:29So then, when I was home, I was very keen to take all the measures of this.

00:55:31My mother, my mother, my mother lives.

00:55:33And I started to see the measures of this.

00:55:35Because of us, we spoke to them.

00:55:36We said that, what did they say?

00:55:37They did.

00:55:38But because of their patients, their life, their appearance, their diseases, their communities,

00:55:42their lives, their so great them.

00:55:45You also do that.

00:55:46Absolutely.

00:55:47Your boundaries are very necessary.

00:55:50Yes.

00:55:51And to respect those boundaries.

00:55:53There is a time when our parents are young.

00:55:56We are seeing them.

00:55:58For their validation, we are living.

00:56:01Then, gradually, we feel more coming from them.

00:56:04We learn more.

00:56:06We see more the world.

00:56:07Then, gradually, when they come to a certain age,

00:56:10then, you need to filter them.

00:56:15You need to take them.

00:56:17And you need to take them.

00:56:19This is why, Servat said,

00:56:21that you need to know yourself.

00:56:24Otherwise, you will give them a lot.

00:56:27You will do this.

00:56:29You did not do that.

00:56:31When you know yourself,

00:56:33you will be so confident.

00:56:35You will listen to the other side.

00:56:37You know, Nida,

00:56:38like my two daughters,

00:56:40Rohan and Arya,

00:56:41till they were,

00:56:42I would say, six years old,

00:56:45they were both guplu.

00:56:47And they started to move quickly.

00:56:50Their hurdles were crossed.

00:56:53When Ella Noor was born,

00:56:55she was crawling until she was one year old.

00:56:59Now, she is fifteen months old,

00:57:02and one month ago,

00:57:04she started to move directly.

00:57:06Right?

00:57:07She never crawled.

00:57:08Yes.

00:57:09So, there was a comparison

00:57:10in our society.

00:57:12Look, Ella doesn't move.

00:57:13Look, she doesn't move.

00:57:14She doesn't move.

00:57:15She doesn't move.

00:57:16She doesn't move.

00:57:17She doesn't move.

00:57:18She doesn't move.

00:57:19She doesn't move.

00:57:20She doesn't have any attention.

00:57:21You are busy, Servat.

00:57:22You are busy.

00:57:23But, why did it affect me?

00:57:25Yes.

00:57:26Because, I was learning

00:57:27that every child has a different growth chart.

00:57:31Yes.

00:57:32Which has been taken by themselves.

00:57:34So, even having two kids,

00:57:36if I don't know this thing,

00:57:38that every child has a different capacity of growth,

00:57:43I feel this.

00:57:45Yes.

00:57:46Because, my two children,

00:57:47you are busy.

00:57:48You are busy.

00:57:49I need to take it to the doctor.

00:57:51Yes.

00:57:52But, because I was well-read,

00:57:55and I was well-informed,

00:57:57I did not take it to heart.

00:57:58Yes.

00:57:59I thought, yes,

00:58:00I don't know them now.

00:58:01When they go,

00:58:02they will go away.

00:58:03And that's just happened.

00:58:04Yes.

00:58:05When they go,

00:58:06they go away.

00:58:07They go away.

00:58:08They go away.

00:58:09So, it's very important

00:58:10that my mother is well-read.

00:58:12Yes.

00:58:13Now, everything is,

00:58:14Chad, GPT.

00:58:15If you don't have any education,

00:58:17you can open it.

00:58:18Chad, GPT.

00:58:19Yes.

00:58:20You can open it.

00:58:21And that's what happens.

00:58:22When I became a mother,

00:58:23I didn't know anything.

00:58:24But my third daughter,

00:58:27who is very techno,

00:58:28when she became a mother,

00:58:29she was a doctor.

00:58:31She had all the things

00:58:33before her delivery.

00:58:34So, I was a very angry mother,

00:58:36at that age,

00:58:37and at that age,

00:58:39she said,

00:58:41she said,

00:58:42I'm a doctor.

00:58:43I know what happened.

00:58:44Yes.

00:58:45And it's very important

00:58:46that,

00:58:47you read a lot,

00:58:49it's a problem.

00:58:51Yes.

00:58:52So, it's very important

00:58:53to keep balance.

00:58:54Let's take a short break.

00:58:55We'll see you after the break.

00:58:56Good morning, Pakistan.

00:59:03Welcome.

00:59:04Welcome back.

00:59:05Good morning, Pakistan.

00:59:06So,

00:59:07today,

00:59:08it's a very important topic

00:59:09in our show,

00:59:10which I enjoy,

00:59:11and I'm also learning

00:59:12a lot.

00:59:13I hope that you're learning.

00:59:16So, next,

00:59:17who are you with us?

00:59:19Rabia.

00:59:20Yes, Rabia.

00:59:21Aslamu alikum.

00:59:22Hello.

00:59:23Aslamu alikum.

00:59:24Welcome.

00:59:25Yes, Rabia.

00:59:26Aslamu alikum.

00:59:27Aslamu alikum.

00:59:28Aslamu alikum.

00:59:29Aslamu alikum.

00:59:30Aslamu alikum.

00:59:31Aslamu alikum.

00:59:32Aslamu alikum.

00:59:33Aslamu alikum.

00:59:34Aslamu alikum.

00:59:35Aslamu alikum.

00:59:36Aslamu alikum.

00:59:37Aslamu alikum.

00:59:38Aslamu alikum.

00:59:39Aslamu alikum.

00:59:40Aslamu alikum.

00:59:41Aslamu alikum.

00:59:42Aslamu alikum.

00:59:43Aslamu alikum.

00:59:44Aslamu alikum.

00:59:45Aslamu alikum.

00:59:46Aslamu alikum.

00:59:47Aslamu alikum.

00:59:48Aslamu alikum.

00:59:49Aslamu alikum.

00:59:50Aslamu alikum.

00:59:51Aslamu alikum.

00:59:52Aslamu alikum.

00:59:53Aslamu alikum.

00:59:54Aslamu alikum.

00:59:55Aslamu alikum.

00:59:56Aslamu alikum.

00:59:57Aslamu alikum.

00:59:58Aslamu alikum.

00:59:59Aslamu alikum.

01:00:00Aslamu alikum.

01:00:01Aslamu alikum.

01:00:02Aslamu alikum.

01:00:03Aslamu alikum.

01:00:04Aslamu alikum.

01:00:05Aslamu alikum.

01:00:06Aslamu alikum.

01:00:07Aslamu alikum.

01:00:08Aslamu alikum.

01:00:09She's doing it.

01:00:11I'm doing it.

01:00:13I'm seeing it.

01:00:15I'm seeing it.

01:00:17But, when I'm seeing it,

01:00:19she's taking her name.

01:00:21She's saying she's doing it.

01:00:23She's doing it.

01:00:25She's doing it.

01:00:27But I've seen it every thing.

01:00:29I don't think she's doing it.

01:00:31Is it like this?

01:00:33I don't see it.

01:00:35But she doesn't say it.

01:00:37She doesn't say it.

01:00:39She's doing it.

01:00:41She's doing it.

01:00:43I'm thinking,

01:00:45my husband is sitting here,

01:00:47she doesn't say anything.

01:00:49But I'm thinking,

01:00:51what do I think?

01:00:53I'm thinking,

01:00:55what do I do?

01:00:57I'm thinking,

01:00:59I'm thinking,

01:01:01I'm thinking,

01:01:03I'm going to go there and cancel it.

01:01:05I'm thinking,

01:01:07I'm thinking,

01:01:09I can't wait.

01:01:11I'll go in.

01:01:13But I'm thinking,

01:01:15I'm thinking,

01:01:17I'm thinking,

01:01:19I'm thinking,

01:01:21Now, my husband had a tea set.

01:01:24After that, my mother asked me if I had a gift.

01:01:30She said that it was a tea set.

01:01:34She said that it was a tea set.

01:01:38She said that it was a very fancy bowl.

01:01:42She said that it was a very good bowl.

01:01:44But she gave us a lot of gifts.

01:01:46But my mother did not appreciate it.

01:01:49But she said that it was a very good boy.

01:01:52I told her that it was a very good boy.

01:01:54But I would like to think about it.

01:01:57But I would like to think about it.

01:02:00Mother, you can say everything.

01:02:02You can say everything.

01:02:04Why did you say everything?

01:02:06Mother, you can say everything.

01:02:10Yes, Mother, I have a lot of time.

01:02:14Because Mother is a conscious.

01:02:17You can say everything.

01:02:19Yes.

01:02:20Yes.

01:02:21Yes.

01:02:22Yes.

01:02:23Yes.

01:02:24Yes.

01:02:25Yes.

01:02:26Yes.

01:02:27Yes.

01:02:28Yes.

01:02:29Yes.

01:02:30Yes.

01:02:31Yes.

01:02:32Yes.

01:02:33Yes.

01:02:34Yes.

01:02:37Yes.

01:02:38Yes.

01:02:39one, two things I will say.

01:02:41Look, this is a little religious and morality

01:02:45that if you are doing good for someone,

01:02:49then don't do it, and do it for God.

01:02:52Okay, God has put it in the spirit of a person

01:02:54that we want to worship.

01:02:56Now, if you are so hidden,

01:02:58if you want to worship for someone,

01:03:00then you will get a reward for God.

01:03:02If you want to worship for a person,

01:03:04then you will have to highlight,

01:03:06you will have to tell,

01:03:08that we have done this.

01:03:09This comparison is possible

01:03:11that the children of their children

01:03:14can tell them.

01:03:16Look, it is possible to tell their children.

01:03:18Look, they have done this,

01:03:20and they were asking you.

01:03:22You don't let them understand.

01:03:24You start to tell your children

01:03:26about your husband.

01:03:28What do you think about it?

01:03:30It feels like their daughter.

01:03:32Yes.

01:03:33He will only give the mother.

01:03:34He will only give the mother

01:03:37and give the mother.

01:03:38So, you don't even know what to do.

01:03:39A man with his daughter's daughter.

01:03:40That is something that.

01:03:41And even if that happens to a child,

01:03:42and his mother will also show

01:03:44that they have done this work

01:03:45and the things that they have done,

01:03:46that they are done so well.

01:03:47They are done so well.

01:03:48And they are done so well.

01:03:49If three children have one or two children,

01:03:51then they know that one is expressive

01:03:54and they don't have a lot.

01:03:55and no one doesn't happen.

01:03:57The big baby will be more expressive,

01:03:59but it won't be so much.

01:04:01So that's the thing that we vary.

01:04:03That's the thing that we have to say,

01:04:05that we should have to blame the expiry rate.

01:04:07If we don't understand,

01:04:09if we don't understand,

01:04:11if we don't understand,

01:04:13we become strategic,

01:04:15we express it.

01:04:17If we don't understand,

01:04:19if we don't understand,

01:04:21if we don't understand,

01:04:23if we don't understand,

01:04:25if we don't understand,

01:04:27then what's your name?

01:04:29Saeed.

01:04:31You start to understand,

01:04:33we start to understand,

01:04:35we start to understand,

01:04:37so that you start to understand,

01:04:39so that you can balance that.

01:04:41Also, very important,

01:04:43when you play emotional cards,

01:04:45when you play.

01:04:47So,

01:04:49if your mother,

01:04:51like me,

01:04:53I do a lot of things,

01:04:55and I'm like Saeed,

01:04:57I'm like Saeed,

01:04:59I don't tell,

01:05:01I don't show,

01:05:03but a lot of times,

01:05:05Dr. Saeba said,

01:05:07that you have to live in the world,

01:05:09so sometimes,

01:05:11play the emotional card.

01:05:13Sit with your mother,

01:05:15tell her that,

01:05:17that Saeed has asked her,

01:05:19so that Saeed has asked her,

01:05:21that Saeed has been so embarrassed,

01:05:23that Saeed was so embarrassed,

01:05:25that Saeed has been so embarrassed,

01:05:27that Saeed has called the doctor,

01:05:28but Saeed has told you not that,

01:05:29that I am telling you.

01:05:31This is a great,

01:05:33that they did not know that a lot of times,

01:05:35times our parents don't know what to say, what to say, what to say, what to say, what to say.

01:05:40We have said that if it is less than done, then what to say. But you need to know what

01:05:48vocabulary you are using and what to reinforce. If you do a little emotional, because if

01:05:56your emotional emotional effect comes from you, that the other people do something like that,

01:06:04you get a big gift, you get a big place, you get a big celebration, so you also see that little girl.

01:06:14Very very important how you present the idea. Now there is a page, there is a dark dot,

01:06:21it depends on whether you are looking at the white space or the black dot.

01:06:27The situation is the same. What you want to show your mother's perspective,

01:06:32that depends on you. Another very important thing is, Nida,

01:06:37today on Instagram, there are parenting pages on Instagram,

01:06:41which you can create a better parent and a better child.

01:06:47So, traumas have been, parenting in your 40s, how to be a good son or daughter,

01:06:56in your 40s. You follow all these things.

01:06:59The awareness that the world is doing, and they are dealing with these

01:07:05kinds of things. Because it is not a Pakistan problem.

01:07:09Yes. This is a universal problem.

01:07:11Yes. Age factor, when parents come to a certain age, whether they are American, Australian,

01:07:17Canadian, African, or Pakistani, or Indian, they all think in one way.

01:07:23Because their upbringing is a universal world.

01:07:27You know, your upbringing is like this. So, you can see those pages, follow them,

01:07:33and play a little bit emotional there.

01:07:35The hero syndrome of Mama, too.

01:07:37You know that, Mother, you know that you have Vasim, Saeed,

01:07:40that he can't sleep so much twice.

01:07:44Yes.

01:07:45That, Saeed, depends on your happiness. At the same time, it is very important that your happiness

01:07:55doesn't come from your mother's approval. Your happiness doesn't come from you.

01:08:01So, stop depending on your parents' approval, on your spouse's approval,

01:08:07for what you are doing in life. You have to approve yourself. That's it.

01:08:12You have to be satisfied. You have to be satisfied. You have to be satisfied.

01:08:18And no one has to be satisfied.

01:08:19Mother has to be satisfied, Saeed, Vasim has to be satisfied. It does not matter.

01:08:24Yes.

01:08:24Until you will satisfy yourself, you will be satisfied.

01:08:27Until you will be satisfied, you will never be satisfied.

01:08:31No.

01:08:31Find it within yourself. Appreciate yourself.

01:08:35That, I am listening to all these things.

01:08:37Now, my mother, who is a principal for 25 years,

01:08:41I don't want to do anything, Nidha.

01:08:45They say, you have not done this.

01:08:47You have not done that.

01:08:49Now, that is the way of love.

01:08:51In my 40s, I can understand now, that it is the way of love.

01:08:55It is getting dirty.

01:08:56It is not getting dirty.

01:08:58It is getting dirty.

01:08:59Now, I know that they are getting concerned.

01:09:02But their vocabulary, their way of talking is correct.

01:09:05Because they say that they are the principal, so they are the only way of talking.

01:09:08The other way of talking is correct.

01:09:09They cannot change.

01:09:10They cannot change.

01:09:11Because they are the tune of their own.

01:09:13Absolutely.

01:09:14So, if I am offended that they are the only way of thinking about negative reinforcement.

01:09:20They are the only way of thinking.

01:09:22So, I need to understand that that is the principle.

01:09:24Because it is the way of thinking.

01:09:26So, if your mother is doing this, leave it.

01:09:29Do not take it.

01:09:30Mother's word is not the final word.

01:09:33All my life, my mother, was very straightforward.

01:09:37And when I was in my teenage years, I had to understand that I was very close to my father.

01:09:42That I was very close to my father.

01:09:44And my mother was not the same.

01:09:47That I was hugged.

01:09:49But practically, it was a lot of fun.

01:09:51That at that time, it didn't come to us.

01:09:53That we understood when we were my mother.

01:09:56That they did a lot for us.

01:09:57It was just the way of putting love or loving it.

01:10:00It was not the way of loving it.

01:10:02It was the way of loving it.

01:10:04So, every person who is loving it, the way of loving it is different.

01:10:09For example, my husband, I had to teach him that you don't do it like that.

01:10:14So, he said that my love is different.

01:10:17I don't go to work in the morning.

01:10:19You go to work in the morning.

01:10:21And I miss you in the morning.

01:10:22So, I want to be with you in your work.

01:10:28So, this is my love.

01:10:30That I have given you my time.

01:10:32And also, very important is to pick your battles.

01:10:36Yes.

01:10:37And that's what I have given you my time.

01:10:39Yes.

01:10:40You can't take anything.

01:10:41Yes.

01:10:42You can't take anything from your heart.

01:10:44You can't take anything from your heart.

01:10:46You can't take anything from your heart.

01:10:48but you have negative connotations of your mother's life in a daily life

01:10:55and you have to understand that this is her own way

01:10:59and she doesn't do better than that

01:11:02and we can change the mothers in this age

01:11:04they have their habits and their dreams are all fixed

01:11:07we can't change that

01:11:09in young age, you will be able to put the children in that way

01:11:14but then a certain age becomes difficult to change

01:11:17and take therapy

01:11:19I am saying this

01:11:21I am taking this

01:11:22I have been taking therapy for the past 3.5 years

01:11:26and the growth in my mind

01:11:29I mean for me to understand

01:11:31what are my generational traumas

01:11:34what are my childhood traumas

01:11:36a lot of times

01:11:37I used to say that

01:11:39I would get every happy with Fahad

01:11:41why would you get every happy with Fahad

01:11:43your happy is to find yourself

01:11:45you breed

01:11:47you take time for yourself

01:11:48you work hard on yourself

01:11:50you take love and love

01:11:52and do that

01:11:54as an actor

01:11:55I feel that

01:11:56we are only 24 hours acting

01:11:58we need approval

01:12:00we need approval

01:12:01we need approval

01:12:02we need approval

01:12:03we need approval

01:12:04One important thing is that our women don't know how to take therapy.

01:12:13Is there a lot of people who are happy to take therapy?

01:12:16Or is there a lot of people who are happy to take therapy?

01:12:19I don't know.

01:12:20Now I think I'm going to take therapy.

01:12:22I think Nida, when you have a feeling of being, you need to take therapy.

01:12:27I am also something.

01:12:28Yes.

01:12:29I am also something.

01:12:31My existence is.

01:12:34You are someone, you are a human.

01:12:37You are just a daughter, a baby, a daughter.

01:12:41You are also something.

01:12:43You are a human.

01:12:44So, as you have a feeling that I am something, you need to take therapy.

01:12:49Because in therapy, your own things are resolved.

01:12:54And what is a little damage or a little damage?

01:12:56Exactly.

01:12:57Which will have a side effect.

01:12:58It will be better.

01:12:59It will be better.

01:13:00It will not be better.

01:13:01But if you have a bad therapist, then?

01:13:03So, Nida, it took me four therapists to find my therapist.

01:13:07Yes.

01:13:08Yes.

01:13:09Yes.

01:13:10Yes.

01:13:11Yes.

01:13:12Yes.

01:13:13Yes.

01:13:14Yes.

01:13:15Yes.

01:13:16Yes.

01:13:17Yes.

01:13:18Yes.

01:13:19Yes.

01:13:20Yes.

01:13:21Yes.

01:13:22Yes.

01:13:23Yes.

01:13:24Yes.

01:13:25Yes.

01:13:26Yes.

01:13:27Yes.

01:13:28Yes.

01:13:29Thanks.

01:13:30Yes.

01:13:37Yes.

01:13:40Yes.

01:13:42I don't understand that.

01:13:43So, you don't give a respect.

01:13:45You don't give a better therapist.

01:13:48Therapists are very amazing therapists in Pakistan.

01:13:52And I'll tell you, these are Asian problems.

01:13:55Those who live in Pakistan outside of America,

01:13:59there will be a problem with the therapist.

01:14:01Because English therapists don't understand our societal pressure.

01:14:04So, all my cousins,

01:14:07they find all Pakistanis online therapists.

01:14:10So, we are so happy that we have therapists in our society.

01:14:15So, please, seek therapists.

01:14:18Seek therapy.

01:14:19In life, there are better things in life.

01:14:22Then, the year will go,

01:14:24your life will go.

01:14:26That time will not come.

01:14:27Then, the time will not come back.

01:14:29And that relationship will not be like that.

01:14:31That thing will be worse and worse.

01:14:34You know, what happens now?

01:14:35I have to go somewhere to Fahad and I don't know.

01:14:38It took me three years of therapy to say,

01:14:40no, Fahad, I don't have a vote.

01:14:42You go.

01:14:43So, now, Fahad also looks like Fahad alone.

01:14:45I look like that.

01:14:46So, first of all, why don't I go alone?

01:14:49No, there will be a lot of girls.

01:14:51No, this will happen, that will happen.

01:14:53What will happen?

01:14:54Nothing will happen.

01:14:55It will happen.

01:14:56Your peace of mind,

01:14:57my Netflix time,

01:14:58or my zone out time,

01:15:00is more important than

01:15:02his attention on other women.

01:15:04And other women's attention on him,

01:15:06they will give their attention.

01:15:08You know, I will say the same.

01:15:10You will go and get myself.

01:15:12First of all, I will say,

01:15:14I won't tell you,

01:15:15I don't need to check my phone,

01:15:16or do something else.

01:15:17I want to do something.

01:15:18Whatever happens, it will be.

01:15:20And do you know, what happens?

01:15:21You will be comfortable.

01:15:22When you think and manifest,

01:15:25it will be.

01:15:26But you don't have to be comfortable.

01:15:28No, you are comfortable.

01:15:30You are at your peace.

01:15:32If you are a source of peace for your spouse, you are insecure, anxious, attention, you can transfer your anxiety to your spouse.

01:15:43So that's why you have to be peaceful and you will find peace for yourself.

01:15:47Absolutely.

01:15:48And your question is related to you that you are not happy, where you feel that there is a problem and it is not solved.

01:15:56You have to be a therapy because many people are probably understanding.

01:16:00You can tell me what the average woman does.

01:16:02If it feels like there is a problem, it can be a person who will phone, someone who will tell you what I am doing.

01:16:10How many wrong things will tell you.

01:16:13Exactly, we don't solve it.

01:16:15You have to be a therapy, you have to be counseling, because many people may not understand this.

01:16:20Many people come to therapy and after 10-12 sessions, they start to feel that I am something, I don't have a wife, I don't have a daughter, I don't have a mother, I don't have a wife, I don't have a wife, I don't have a wife, I don't have a wife, I don't have a wife.

01:16:32Same for the man as well, they have different struggles.

01:16:35So one criteria is that problems are not solved, sadness is not going to go, it's not going to go, it's not going to sleep, it's not going to go, it's going to be therapy.

01:16:45We are taking a little break, now we will talk about therapy, now we are taking a little break.

01:16:51Good morning.

01:16:58Welcome, welcome back, good morning Pakistan.

01:17:02Thanks to you guys, that we are able to learn many things today.

01:17:08We are able to learn many things today.

01:17:11We are able to learn many things today.

01:17:13So if someone is listening to me at this time,

01:17:16or parents who are watching a certain age,

01:17:18who are watching our show,

01:17:20so if you want to change yourself a little bit,

01:17:23to improve your life,

01:17:26then there is no harm.

01:17:28Yes, absolutely,

01:17:30You know, because at this time,

01:17:32we cannot learn our parents,

01:17:34and they are not prepared for learning.

01:17:37So there is no way to learn.

01:17:39Like,

01:17:40you have to forward a meme,

01:17:43so what do I do?

01:17:45To tell my mother,

01:17:47that the way you love is negative,

01:17:51and I send her memes to her.

01:17:55Or,

01:17:56I send the parental pages on Instagram,

01:17:59which are guides,

01:18:01I send them.

01:18:02So,

01:18:03not by face,

01:18:04if you sit on the face,

01:18:05and say,

01:18:06mother, you have not done it,

01:18:07then they will also be offended.

01:18:08Yes.

01:18:09But there are,

01:18:10find ways,

01:18:11that you can educate them.

01:18:12Yes,

01:18:13like my children send me.

01:18:14Yes,

01:18:15like my children send me.

01:18:16So,

01:18:17I will be friendly with them.

01:18:19It's a lot of fun.

01:18:20It's a lot of fun.

01:18:21There are certain skits,

01:18:23like brown mothers.

01:18:25Yes.

01:18:26Yes.

01:18:27Yes.

01:18:28Yes.

01:18:29Yes.

01:18:30Yes.

01:18:31Yes.

01:18:32Yes.

01:18:33Yes, exactly.

01:18:34But,

01:18:35it's very important,

01:18:36that we can educate ourselves,

01:18:37and also,

01:18:38who is living with us?

01:18:39Yes.

01:18:40Yes.

01:18:41Yes.

01:18:42Yes.

01:18:43Yes.

01:18:44Yes.

01:18:45Yes.

01:18:46Yes.

01:18:47Yes.

01:18:48Yes.

01:18:49Yes.

01:18:50Yes.

01:18:51I was sharing with you.

01:18:53I wanted to share this with you,

01:18:54that I am going to have three years to marry.

01:18:56We,

01:18:58we are with me同士.

01:18:59Yes.

01:19:00I am the same,

01:19:01but,

01:19:02I have a lot of issues...

01:19:04and,

01:19:05we have many falls.

01:19:07So,

01:19:08we have to do something for our children,

01:19:10and,

01:19:11let me paint something,

01:19:12but,

01:19:13actually,

01:19:14my daughter is from a family.

01:19:15I am from as a family.

01:19:16So this thing, I've heard 50 times in a day that I've heard this is my daughter's daughter, my daughter's daughter, I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't do this.

01:19:28I'm a daughter, my daughter's daughter, I can't do this because she's though me late, I can't do this, I can't do this, but I can't do this, I can't do this.

01:19:58require so much. When the people came down when you have a head. They look at how they

01:20:05are saying, they are saying and now that I could think of him. Why are they because my husband

01:20:10will have permission. If I can't say that I'll call it mentally torture me with me. That

01:20:15the guilt of my marriage is not something. Me of my feelings in my life, because it discusses

01:20:20your attitude. I have no experience myself. I'm not allowed to miss this. I am not falando

01:20:24I think that my husband gave me a good bonding.

01:20:30But when I was married, it was a good bonding.

01:20:33And I didn't say anything.

01:20:35But I was removed from him.

01:20:37I was not afraid of you.

01:20:40Yes, I don't think that.

01:20:42But if there are so many appreciation and so many things,

01:20:47there are changes in every person.

01:20:50But it's not that I don't say anything.

01:20:53But changes will come.

01:20:55Because every thing I have to do is neglect.

01:20:59Now I'm saying that my husband is my husband.

01:21:02It's my husband.

01:21:04You've been your own.

01:21:06You've been your own.

01:21:08You've been your own.

01:21:10You've been your own.

01:21:12I've been your own.

01:21:14I've been so much for you.

01:21:16I've been so much for you.

01:21:18I don't know your mother.

01:21:20You've been your own.

01:21:21You've been your own.

01:21:22You've been your own.

01:21:23I've been your own.

01:21:24I've been your own.

01:21:25I find it.

01:21:26You've got whatever the form of your father is.

01:21:36So this is a place of favouritism, so there is also a place where boss is not a favourite.

01:21:42Yes.

01:21:43I feel like they are talking about my daughter's daughter and my daughter's daughter,

01:21:48so I also want to keep them together.

01:21:51Every thing is coming up with them.

01:21:55If I am doing so, they don't look at them.

01:21:58Yes.

01:22:00Now look, there is a lot of dynamic in this situation.

01:22:05They have said that their relationship and bonding is very good.

01:22:09So this is also possible.

01:22:12Sometimes it happens that people are secure.

01:22:15If there will be a lot of friends in the house,

01:22:17then it will be rule and divide.

01:22:19Oh yes.

01:22:20Divide and rule.

01:22:21Politics.

01:22:22It can happen.

01:22:23It is not like that, but it can happen.

01:22:25Actually, this happens in the houses.

01:22:28The people think that if we get these two countries,

01:22:32then what will it happen?

01:22:34Yes.

01:22:35That's why they don't get them both countries.

01:22:37They don't get them.

01:22:38They don't get them.

01:22:39They don't get them.

01:22:40They don't get them.

01:22:41Yes.

01:22:42They don't get them.

01:22:43They don't get them.

01:22:44Yes.

01:22:45They don't get them.

01:22:46They don't care.

01:22:47They don't get the same countries that have been.

01:22:48They don't get them.

01:22:49They don't get them or because they do?

01:22:50They don't have to, because they want them to for all.

01:22:51So they used their most 어렵 OK to get them all

01:23:09It's a very good thing.

01:23:11Why do you want to be a favorite?

01:23:14Why is it necessary for you to be a favorite?

01:23:17If they are a favorite, give them a favorite.

01:23:19Now what is it?

01:23:21If you detach yourself from this thing,

01:23:23you will also think that they will be more than them.

01:23:26Because they are a favorite, they will do a good job.

01:23:29You will leave your own love.

01:23:31That's a good thing.

01:23:33That's a good thing.

01:23:35You will keep this attitude.

01:23:37If you have a favorite, you will not be a favorite.

01:23:41You are very happy in your own place.

01:23:43You are very happy in your own place.

01:23:45You are very good.

01:23:47You are good.

01:23:49You are good.

01:23:51You don't get appreciation.

01:23:53You do not get appreciation.

01:23:55Sometimes you have to be a fun.

01:23:57Because in the mood you are not very aggressive.

01:23:59What happens is that you will be able to show yourself.

01:24:03You will be able to show yourself.

01:24:05Someone will say they are very straightforward.

01:24:07She will be able to tell you the best in the mood.

01:24:09She will say that they are my daughter's daughter's daughter's daughter.

01:24:11We will also say that this alone is my daughter's daughter's daughter.

01:24:13When the mother is my daughter's daughter's daughter.

01:24:15We will also have the sameضir Member.

01:24:17So, also, I am your daughter's daughter's daughter.

01:24:19He is saying that when you are your daughter's daughter,

01:24:20speak out for you.

01:24:21Tell yourself that.

01:24:22Don't don't get aggressive for you.

01:24:23Tell yourself.

01:24:25If you are going to leave that way,

01:24:27So try to excuse yourself and get out of there.

01:24:30In the beginning, it might be that you don't sit with us,

01:24:34but it's important to you to keep your energy and keep your peace of mind.

01:24:40If people want to do this 5-6 times,

01:24:43they want to sit with them.

01:24:46So they will stop talking about this 8-9 times.

01:24:48They will know that if these things happen, they will get out of there.

01:24:51I totally agree with you.

01:24:52Our religion also says,

01:24:55that you want to be happy with your family.

01:24:58This is our community and society.

01:25:01There is also a family, their parents, their sisters.

01:25:05Everyone wants to be happy with your family.

01:25:07There is nothing.

01:25:09We take society pressure on ourselves.

01:25:12That I want to be happy with your family.

01:25:16But that is not.

01:25:17Your religion says that you want to be happy with your family.

01:25:21A lot of times, gossip is a lot of times.

01:25:24It is a lot of times that you don't have to be happy with your family.

01:25:30It is a lot of times that you don't have to be happy with your family.

01:25:32You don't have to be happy with your family.

01:25:34You don't have to be happy with your family.

01:25:41You don't have to be happy with your family.

01:25:43You don't have to be happy with your family.

01:25:49It is a lot of times that you don't have to be happy with your family.

01:25:51The religion allows you that you have to take away from the place, from the place and from the place, from the place and from the place.

01:26:00So when your religion is doing this, because your focus of this entire marriage should be your spouse.

01:26:08You keep your parents and your children.

01:26:11Like you said, what a good thing you have to say.

01:26:14If it is their favourite, then what is your approval?

01:26:19It is their favourite and they will probably stay in their life because it is their blood.

01:26:24And you will never be able to take that place.

01:26:27You should know what you bring to the table.

01:26:31Maybe they do 10 things that you don't do.

01:26:35But you do one thing that is brought to them.

01:26:40So you should know and you should be confident that you bring this to your family.

01:26:45Maybe they have stability, maybe they have a sense of humour.

01:26:48Maybe they have to take away from the table.

01:26:50Maybe they have to ignore all of these things.

01:26:55This trait is also very gold.

01:26:58And sometimes you can't talk with the people.

01:27:01You can't talk with the people.

01:27:02You can't talk with the people.

01:27:03Absolutely.

01:27:04So you can't hide and leave them.

01:27:06Thank you so much, Sarvat.

01:27:08Thank you so much, your vlog.

01:27:09Thank you so much, your vlog.

01:27:10That you have so much fun and you have educated people.

01:27:14And we will say that if you think that you need to be a better treatment for survival,

01:27:19if you need to be a better treatment for survival,

01:27:20please make the quality of your life better.

01:27:22Please make your quality better.

01:27:23Don't reduce your circumstances, your day, your month, your year,

01:27:26your year you may have to be a better time.

01:27:28Because when it's too late, then they will be back again.

01:27:30Good morning Pakistan, Fadaafir.

01:27:32So, da hafiz.

01:28:02So, da hafiz.

Good Morning Pakistan | 2 May 2025 | ARY Digital

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