Ally McBeal Season 1 Episode 6
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00:01Previously on Ally McBeal
00:03You could have kissed him.
00:05It would have broken the rules, of course,
00:07but here's a flash, Ally. Some guys are shy.
00:09What, he can't be a man and just paw me a little?
00:11I am a sexual object, for God's sake.
00:13He couldn't give me a little grope?
00:14Ronnie, just give me a couple more days.
00:16Can you at least do that?
00:18No.
00:20I really just can't go into it.
00:22It's just, it's just, oh, what's the word?
00:25Alone, mateless.
00:27All I ever wanted was to be rich and to be successful
00:30and to have three kids and a husband
00:32who was waiting home for me at night to tickle my feet
00:34and look at me.
00:36Look at how I've...
00:38I don't even like my hair.
00:40Ally, love, it's an equation.
00:43A me, a you, derives a we.
00:46I'll try to remember that.
00:48I think I need to believe that it works.
00:50What works?
00:51The idea that when people come together, they stay together.
00:54I have to take that with me when I go to bed at night,
00:57even if I'm going to bed alone.
00:59That's a McBealism.
01:05Isn't it beautiful?
01:06Yeah.
01:07It's kind of old looking.
01:09Well, I think it's perfect
01:10and I can't wait to start taking lessons again.
01:13Can you play anything now?
01:14Well, heart and soul and, and chopsticks.
01:18Oh!
01:19Wait, wait, wait, let's see.
01:21Um...
01:22Good night, my someone.
01:28Good night.
01:29I know that.
01:31That's from the Music Man.
01:32My mother's saying that to us all the time.
01:34Sleep tight, my someone.
01:38Sleep tight, my love, love, love, love.
01:44Ugh.
01:45I could never get that note right.
01:46Tell me about it.
01:47True love can be whispered from heart to heart.
02:00When lovers are potted, they say,
02:07But I must depend on a wish and a star.
02:17As long as my heart doesn't know who you are.
02:29This is a sad song.
02:33It's about a lady who's got nobody.
02:36So she's gotta sing to an imaginary someone every night.
02:39It's about a lady who's...
02:40Just like us.
02:42I hate pianos.
02:44Maybe I can sell it.
02:50Up and down this road
02:53Walking the line
02:55It's been a pride
02:57And I have made mistakes in my life that I just can't hide.
03:05Oh, I believe I'm ready.
03:08But love has to bring me.
03:12Yeah.
03:13I got myself together
03:17Now I'm ready to sing
03:21I've been searching my soul tonight
03:24I know there's so much more to life
03:28Now I know I can shine the light
03:31To find my way back home
03:35Oh, baby
03:37Oh, yeah
03:42I'm supposed to get an injunction so they can't sell ice cream.
03:52You'll do your best.
03:52How can I possibly attach the real estate, the claim itself?
03:55They don't expect you to win the motion, Allie.
03:57The client's just insisting that we be aggressive.
03:59And aggressive we shall be.
04:01Harry Pippin is opposing counsel so early and ready to pop when he comes through the door.
04:04Who's Harry Pippin?
04:05Fat man, no win, moves like continental drift.
04:07As soon as he enters the room, they move his case to the top, and then off you go.
04:10Well, what do you mean, as soon as he enters the room?
04:12Well, the judges give him a little grace because of his condition.
04:15They don't punish him for being late.
04:16And Richard's right.
04:17He comes through the door arguing his case.
04:19So as soon as he enters, you just got to jump in and get in there.
04:21Thank you, Allie.
04:22Pleasure.
04:29Moving on.
04:29New client, Sandra Winchell, FOW.
04:31I promised we'd help, though I don't know how.
04:33What's FOW?
04:34Friend of Whipper, Sandra Winchell, arrested for prostitution.
04:37Third time, a conviction means jail.
04:39Well, John, since you've recently visited the subject matter, I wouldn't ask, but the
04:44whip is cracked.
04:44Conjugals could be at stake.
04:48Okay, I'll meet with a woman.
04:50Excellent.
04:50Allie, I'd like you to second chair.
04:52If possible, that puritanical prudism you seem to watch could work to our benefit.
04:56Teamwork.
04:56Richard.
04:57Here's the glitch.
04:57She fired her old lawyer last night.
04:59Trial starts today, 11 o'clock.
05:01What?
05:01It won't.
05:02New counsel.
05:02You'll get a continuance.
05:03Try to buy at least a month.
05:05Whoa, whoa, whoa.
05:05Why can't John file for the continuance?
05:07I don't do criminal motion practice.
05:09Why not?
05:11You'll be down there anyway on the ice cream case.
05:13What?
05:13Whoa, whoa, whoa.
05:15Hi.
05:23Hi.
05:23Oh, please.
05:26She was about to ask me a question once.
05:31I said, don't spoil.
05:33I don't want to attach anything audio to her.
05:35What year is this?
05:36No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
05:38This is not a time for words.
05:39This is not a time for words?
05:40Are you...
05:41Oh, see, you can give them law degrees, you can dress them up, but in the end?
05:46Neanderthals.
05:46Oh, come on, Allie.
05:47You can't blame us for looking at...
05:50I can't blame you for looking...
05:52Are you...
05:52For acting like...
05:53Are you guys...
05:55Are they playing a prank on me?
05:57Well, let me tell you something, Allie.
05:58That is nature at its best out there.
06:00They should get Richard Kiley to narrate her.
06:02I'm sure she's quite stupid, and in time, gravity will get her.
06:05Come on, boys club.
06:08Hey.
06:09Free that hooker.
06:12You're the DA on it?
06:13I get a lot of the vice cases.
06:15I've convicted your client before, by the way.
06:17Have you met her?
06:18No, no, but she's supposedly a friend of Whip or so.
06:20Are you going to agree to the continuance?
06:22Yes, yeah.
06:23Oh, I have to wait here until my ice cream case, so I don't know...
06:26I will cover you.
06:28No likelihood of success on the merits.
06:30Court has affidavits, bank accounts, financial statements.
06:34My client can easily satisfy any judgment.
06:37Oh, my God.
06:38That must be Harry Pippen, my ice cream case.
06:40Allie McBeal for the plaintiff.
06:42In 15 years of practice, I've never been so shocked.
06:46I'm denying the plaintiff's motion, Mr. Pippen.
06:48Thank you, Your Honor.
06:50Move for costs, attorney's fees and sanctions, abuse of process, frivolous prosecution, rule 11.
06:58It's shocking.
06:59You lose on that score.
07:01Sorry to hear that, Your Honor.
07:03But I...
07:04The defendant is far from judgment-proof counsel.
07:07I can't attach property no matter what the merits.
07:09We're done.
07:10Mr. Pippen, I'm Allie McBeal, counsel for the plaintiff.
07:16Nice to meet you.
07:17Hi.
07:17Well, I was really hoping that we could sort of settle this out.
07:20I mean, it's kind of silly, two ice cream chains fighting.
07:23And all we're looking for is your guy to change the name of his store and not call it Mike's.
07:26That's his name, Mike.
07:27Well, I understand.
07:28But since he sold the franchise as Mike's and now he's calling his new chain Mike's,
07:31you know, you could see how people could confuse it.
07:33And what my client really feels that he is paid for is the trademark name of Mike's.
07:37And you see, that asset is devalued.
07:40Oh, are you all right?
07:42Mr. Pippen.
07:44Oh, my God.
07:45Mr. Pippen.
07:45Oh, my God.
07:49Oh.
07:50Oh, my God.
08:08Oh, my God.
08:10Somebody call 911.
08:12Oh, I've got a cell phone.
08:14Oh, my God.
08:31Oh, God.
08:33Okay.
08:33Here we go.
08:34Oh, come on.
08:42Come on, Mr. Pippen.
08:43Come on.
08:43Breathe.
08:44Just breathe.
08:46Okay.
08:48Okay.
08:52Oh, my God.
08:54He's breathing.
08:54Check his screws up.
08:56Please.
08:57Oh, my God.
08:58Oh, my God.
08:58Oh, my God.
08:59Oh, my God.
09:00Oh, my God.
09:01Oh, my God.
09:02Oh, my God.
09:02Oh, my God.
09:03You saved his life.
09:05Not before he ate his Spanish omelet.
09:08Oh, God.
09:09The onions.
09:10Is my skin breaking out?
09:12Not yet.
09:13Are you okay?
09:14Yeah.
09:15Well, we better go.
09:16Our little prostitution case is up in two minutes.
09:18Oh.
09:19Are you really okay?
09:20Fine.
09:21Okay.
09:2323222 Commonwealth versus Sandra Winchell.
09:26Your Honor, inasmuch as I've just been retained,
09:28I would be requesting additional time to prepare my defense.
09:33Ah.
09:34Excuse me?
09:35You think I don't know a stall when I see one?
09:38Your Honor, the Commonwealth doesn't oppose a continuance.
09:40I didn't ask.
09:42The fact that the district attorney's office is for it
09:44is another reason for me to be against it.
09:46I just got this case, and I...
09:48If she wants to fire her lawyer, fine.
09:50She should do it before voir dire.
09:51We've already got a jury.
09:53She's had three prior continuances.
09:55This case is marked.
09:56No further continuances.
09:57Your Honor, I...
09:58Shush.
09:59You either say ready for trial,
10:04or I schedule it for a year from now and revoke bail.
10:07You can't...
10:08You can't do that.
10:09Ready for trial or no bail.
10:11Your Honor, in the interest of justice...
10:13I didn't ask ready or not.
10:19Ready.
10:21Today.
10:23Evidently, she's had it continued up the wazoo,
10:25and the judge just finally had enough.
10:32This troubles me.
10:33He said otherwise he'd revoke bail
10:36and have it continued for a year,
10:38and we were kind of stuck.
10:43You have any ideas?
10:53Have I bored you?
10:54Let's proceed.
11:03With the trial?
11:05Yes.
11:06Today?
11:07Yes.
11:08Because you're insane?
11:10Yes.
11:12I'll go...
11:14gather myself.
11:20Ms. McBeal?
11:22Yeah.
11:22I'm Angela Tharp,
11:25Harry Pippin's fiancée.
11:28Oh.
11:29Oh, hey.
11:30Hey, is he okay?
11:32Oh, he's fine.
11:33It wasn't a heart attack, after all.
11:34It was just angina.
11:36And we're getting married on Friday,
11:38and, well,
11:39the doctor thinks it was nerves.
11:42Oh.
11:43Well, that's fantastic.
11:45He's okay.
11:46Yes, thanks to you.
11:48He did lose oxygen,
11:49so if you hadn't have been there,
11:53I just came to tell you how grateful I am.
11:57Oh, well, I'm just glad that I could help.
12:00Oh, you've helped.
12:01He's, uh...
12:03He's the best thing that ever happened to me,
12:06and, well, I think
12:08I'm here because you kind of saved my life, too.
12:12That's sweet.
12:16Can I give you a hug?
12:19Sure.
12:23Oh!
12:25My God.
12:26I've broken you.
12:27No, no, I'm fine.
12:29I feel terrible.
12:30No, no, no, no.
12:30I pop out of alignment so easily.
12:32It's me.
12:33It's me.
12:34Actually, I can fix that.
12:36I'm not a licensed chiropractor,
12:38but I work for one.
12:39I think I'm really okay.
12:41No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
12:42It's just right down here
12:43by the L5.
12:45I'm really okay.
12:46Okay.
12:48Better?
12:50Yeah.
12:50Yeah, much.
12:52Thanks.
12:56I'm just gonna, um...
12:59sit.
13:01Here for a second.
13:04On the floor?
13:05Oh, yeah.
13:05Yeah, I love the floor.
13:07I love the floor.
13:11Will you come to the wedding?
13:16Sure.
13:18Great.
13:19It's Friday, 6 o'clock.
13:21Great.
13:23See you then.
13:25See you then.
13:27Bye.
13:31Somebody's bound to come in here
13:33and help me up.
13:34Shouldn't you be down at the courthouse?
13:39It's only 1.30.
13:40I'll be there,
13:40but it would help, Richard,
13:41if I had some clue
13:42as to how we were gonna defend this case.
13:43You defended vigorously.
13:45Oh, thank you.
13:45I'm clear now.
13:46Richard, I can't even find John Cage.
13:48It's really a question,
13:49a burden of...
13:49Proof.
13:54She can, uh...
14:18really increase the blood flow,
14:19can't she, Richard?
14:20The date itself cost $1,000.
14:28Anything on top of the escort
14:29would be more.
14:30What do you mean,
14:32on top of the escort?
14:34Sex.
14:36Sex was more.
14:37And did you pay more, Dr. Carpenter?
14:39Yes, we agreed upon $700
14:42for missionary intercourse.
14:45And did the two of you...
14:46We began to.
14:48Then, um,
14:48Special Agent McElroy
14:50entered the premises
14:50and, um, intervened.
14:53You were arrested.
14:54I was.
14:55Dr. Carpenter,
14:56your relations with the defendant,
14:58it was sex for a fee.
15:00That's correct.
15:01You're clear on that.
15:02Well, actually,
15:03I have the receipt.
15:04I, uh, deducted for stress therapy.
15:06I see.
15:07Thank you, sir.
15:08Thank you, sir.
15:08Thank you, sir.
15:16Mr. Cage?
15:46Dr. Carpenter,
15:56my name is John Cage.
15:57How do you do, sir?
15:58Hi.
16:06I have no questions,
16:07Your Honor.
16:07No cross at all?
16:34Nothing.
16:35He, he,
16:35he introduces himself
16:37to the client
16:37and he just sits down.
16:39Is he a kook?
16:39I don't know.
16:41He pours water,
16:42he unbuttons.
16:44Never mind.
16:45What never mind?
16:46It's about the case
16:47and you are the enemy.
16:49You're talking about Cage,
16:51I bet.
16:52He's a kook.
16:54Allie.
16:56Perry.
16:57What are you doing
16:58out of the hospital?
16:59They released me.
17:01I went to your office.
17:03They said I could find you here.
17:04Well, what's the matter?
17:07Could we talk in private?
17:10Maybe upstairs?
17:27Something is the matter,
17:28isn't it?
17:28One of my strengths
17:33as a trial lawyer
17:34is I can size people up fast.
17:37I got a feeling about you.
17:40Well, what are you saying?
17:43I'm saying that
17:44in addition to being beautiful,
17:47I can tell you are
17:48a compassionate person.
17:49and, uh,
17:53however remote the odds,
17:55you know,
17:55you can't win a raffle
17:57if you don't at least
17:57buy a ticket.
17:59Well,
18:00what are you saying?
18:03Do you think a person
18:04such as
18:05yourself
18:06could ever become
18:08interested in a person
18:10such as myself?
18:11Um,
18:12well,
18:13absolutely
18:15a person like me
18:16could like somebody
18:17like you.
18:18Absolutely.
18:20Do you think you
18:21could ever become
18:22interested in me?
18:24Um,
18:25well,
18:25uh,
18:26well,
18:26well,
18:27Harry,
18:29um,
18:31Angela's a friend of mine.
18:36And what I mean is
18:37I've met her.
18:38Well,
18:38what I mean is
18:39you're marrying her
18:40Friday.
18:42Yeah.
18:43I've come to reconsider that.
18:45Because of me?
18:47I never had a kiss
18:48like that before,
18:49Allie.
18:50Oh,
18:50Harry,
18:51I...
18:51Don't get me wrong,
18:52I love Angela.
18:55It's,
18:56it's just,
18:58uh,
18:59it's,
19:01it's not a romantic love.
19:04We're good friends
19:05with limited options.
19:06She's not in love with you?
19:09Actually,
19:10she is.
19:11It's
19:11one of the reasons
19:13I,
19:14uh,
19:14it's nice to be
19:16with someone who loves you.
19:17Comfort,
19:18but,
19:18uh...
19:19No,
19:19but,
19:19but what?
19:20Comfort is good.
19:22I'm not asking you
19:23to declare yourself
19:24or anything,
19:25but
19:25if you think
19:26you might have
19:27the slightest inclination
19:29just to,
19:31you know,
19:31to go out on a date,
19:32just to see
19:33if there's
19:34a scintilla
19:35of a chance.
19:41I don't
19:41see the possibility,
19:43Harry.
19:48Okay.
19:50Okay.
19:52Like I said,
19:53you guys
19:53can't win
19:55the raffle
19:55if you don't
19:56at least buy a ticket.
19:56Well,
20:00I'll be leaving now
20:01and I'll
20:03be out of the room
20:05momentarily.
20:08Okay.
20:08What else could you say?
20:27You had to be honest.
20:29Really?
20:29What are you gonna do?
20:30Have him call off
20:31his wedding?
20:32Take him to Burger King
20:33just to be nice?
20:34You should have
20:35seen him sag.
20:37Can I ask you something?
20:38Why did you
20:39automatically
20:39dismiss the idea
20:40of dating him?
20:42Well,
20:43he's,
20:44he's,
20:45I just didn't
20:47think he was
20:48my type.
20:49You ruled him
20:50out in an instant
20:51on looks.
20:52That is not true.
20:53How could it not be?
20:54You don't know him.
20:55I knew enough.
20:57I,
20:57I,
20:57I knew he was
20:58in questionable health.
21:02I,
21:02I get nervous
21:03being around people
21:04with heart conditions.
21:05Why
21:06do you lie
21:07to me?
21:08Let's just
21:09admit the truth.
21:10You eliminated
21:11with an eye blink
21:12on looks alone,
21:14Allie.
21:14That is not,
21:15that,
21:15it just isn't
21:16that simple.
21:18It,
21:19it,
21:19it,
21:19the,
21:20the thought
21:20of the two of us
21:21on a date.
21:24A person gets
21:25a vision
21:25of how he thinks
21:26the date might go
21:27and then you say
21:27yes or no
21:28and I,
21:28I just couldn't
21:29picture
21:30the two of us.
21:31the sad thing is
21:39in a movie
21:41we'd both be
21:42rooting for the gal
21:43to date the guy.
21:49Actually,
21:49I used to be a lawyer.
21:51I worked in a downtown firm
21:53for six years.
21:54Which firm would that be,
21:55ma'am?
21:56Cuppings and Gill.
21:57And,
21:57and you left the bar
21:58to join the escort business?
22:00Yes.
22:01Could you tell the court
22:02the reason for your career change?
22:04Well,
22:04I couldn't meet
22:04any interesting men.
22:06At least not single men.
22:08The best ones,
22:09the most interesting ones,
22:10they were all married.
22:13And they were asking me out.
22:14The married men?
22:15Or I should say
22:16they were asking me in.
22:17And this,
22:19this impelled a change
22:20in your,
22:21in your vocation?
22:22In an odd way,
22:23yes.
22:24Well,
22:24could you elaborate
22:24on the oddity?
22:26Well,
22:26married men,
22:28good men,
22:29were always hitting on me.
22:30And every friendship
22:31I've had with a man,
22:32whether the pretext
22:33be a common love
22:34for Charles Dickens,
22:35the symphony,
22:36shared political views,
22:37similar upbringings,
22:38whatever the basis
22:39for the friendship beginning,
22:41they have almost always
22:42resulted in the man
22:43wanting to have sex with me.
22:44All right.
22:45Yeah, I see.
22:46And this,
22:46this drove you
22:47to the escort service.
22:49It drove me
22:50to the conclusion
22:51that man as a species
22:52is not suitable
22:53for long-term partnership.
22:55Objection!
23:02Withdrawn.
23:03No,
23:03the objection is sustained.
23:05Your Honor,
23:05I'm trying to make sense of this.
23:09You hate men,
23:10and so you became
23:11a call girl.
23:12I became disillusioned
23:14with the idea
23:14of long-term relationships.
23:15Men seem to stay
23:17interested and passionate
23:17for finite periods of time,
23:19so I chose to engage
23:20in finite relationships.
23:22And since I need
23:23to make a living,
23:23I allowed myself
23:24to get paid for it.
23:25And what kind of message
23:27does this send
23:27to young women?
23:28Well,
23:28I'm not trying
23:29to send any message.
23:30In fact,
23:30I've tried to keep it discreet.
23:32You wouldn't even know
23:33about it if I hadn't
23:33been arrested.
23:34Well,
23:35now let's be fair here,
23:36Miss Winchell.
23:37I mean,
23:37you hardly lead
23:37a noble life.
23:40No.
23:40And I've never
23:41disappointed anyone
23:42pretending to be noble.
23:45See the star witness
23:46over there?
23:47Doctor.
23:48Community-minded.
23:49Sits on the school committee.
23:50Coaches boys' soccer.
23:51He's noble.
23:53He also comes to me
23:54with his Visa card
23:55twice a month
23:55to earn frequent flyer miles.
23:57Well,
23:58one might say
23:58you entrapped him
23:59with your feminine wiles.
24:01One might.
24:02But I didn't slither up
24:03to him wearing perfume.
24:05He found me.
24:07In the yellow pages.
24:11Sorry.
24:13The commonwealth
24:14seized your humor.
24:17I don't.
24:24First time I've ever,
24:26ever seen a lawyer
24:26object to her own witness.
24:28Shut up.
24:29And the things
24:30that she was saying
24:30about men
24:31and about relationships,
24:32you think a jury
24:33could buy into that?
24:34Allie,
24:35you objected
24:36because we almost
24:37buy into it.
24:38We do not.
24:39Well,
24:40do we ever meet
24:41interesting single men?
24:42Well,
24:42that's because we're lawyers
24:43and all we meet
24:44are single male attorneys
24:45and that is a pathetic breed.
24:47And I have yet
24:48to meet...
24:52John.
24:55Here is the exception.
24:57Why are you lunching
24:58with the district attorney?
25:00Renee and I live together.
25:02It's come to that.
25:04No men.
25:05We're in the middle
25:06of trial.
25:07I find it inappropriate
25:08for you to be lunching
25:09with the district attorney.
25:15Ali.
25:17Harry Pippin
25:17is making his approach.
25:19So,
25:29what brings you here?
25:32Uh,
25:33just thought I'd, uh,
25:34pop in
25:35and say hi.
25:36Oh.
25:37Oh, uh,
25:38I talked to my client.
25:40They are willing
25:40to change the name
25:41of the new ice cream franchise
25:43if your client
25:44is willing
25:44to waive
25:45the anti-compete clause
25:46in Cambridge.
25:47Oh.
25:48Well,
25:49that,
25:50that sounds like
25:51we could make it work.
25:52Yeah.
25:53Great.
25:54Great.
25:57Door snappish.
25:59So,
26:00um,
26:02anything else,
26:05Harry?
26:06I came to apologize
26:07for the time
26:09that I came before.
26:10Oh,
26:11that's okay.
26:12And I know
26:12Angela was here.
26:14Hmm.
26:16I feel like
26:16I put you on
26:17and in a spot
26:18and it wasn't fair
26:19for me to do that.
26:20Oh,
26:21it's okay.
26:22I,
26:22I was flattered.
26:25Yeah.
26:26Uh,
26:27look,
26:28Ali,
26:29don't take this
26:31the wrong way.
26:32I'm not going
26:32to try to court you,
26:34but...
26:35But what?
26:37You know what I said
26:38before about getting
26:39a feeling about people.
26:41I get the sense
26:42that you're
26:43kind of the romantic type.
26:46Well,
26:46I...
26:47I'm not going
26:47your way with this.
26:48You don't have
26:49to be concerned.
26:49I just came here
26:50for some advice.
26:52Your advice.
26:55Okay.
26:57You know what
26:58I said earlier
26:58about Angela?
27:01I do love her
27:02very much.
27:05She'll be a great mother
27:06and I want kids.
27:08Hmm.
27:08But it's
27:09like love
27:11out of appreciation
27:12and maybe convenience.
27:16She's never made
27:17my heart bounce.
27:20And sexually,
27:21I mean,
27:21I don't even think
27:22of her during...
27:23I guess what
27:25I'm trying to ask you
27:26is...
27:27Do you think
27:29it's wrong
27:30for a person
27:31to marry
27:32another person
27:33not because
27:33she's the one,
27:35but because
27:35she's the only?
27:37Harry,
27:40I can't tell you
27:41whether you should
27:42marry Angela.
27:43You know that.
27:50You know,
27:50I just got this piano
27:52and sometimes
27:56I sing this song
27:58called
27:58Good Night,
27:59My Someone
28:00and it's about...
28:03Well,
28:04basically,
28:05it's a love song
28:06to somebody
28:07that you've never met
28:08but you know
28:08is out there.
28:11And I don't know.
28:12I mean,
28:12we make so few
28:13promises to ourselves
28:15as we grow up
28:16and one of them
28:17is that on our
28:19wedding day
28:19we walk down
28:20the aisle
28:20with somebody
28:21we love.
28:25Somebody who does
28:26make your heart
28:29bounce,
28:29I guess.
28:31And there are
28:32some promises,
28:33Harry,
28:33that I think
28:34we just have to keep.
28:35Elaine!
28:47I come to you
28:48because you're
28:49the designated
28:49sensitive male.
28:51I beg your pardon?
28:53The girl
28:53who works
28:54in the mail room.
28:55You know,
28:55the one who saunters
28:56about demonstrably
28:56with her ample bosom.
28:58What about her?
28:59Well,
28:59the women in the office
29:00don't appreciate
29:01the gawk fest
29:02and we feel
29:03that her
29:04continued presence
29:05together with
29:06the reactions
29:06are contributing
29:07to a hostile
29:08working environment.
29:10Now,
29:10we certainly
29:10don't want to file
29:11but it's probably
29:13best that she
29:13doesn't make
29:14deliveries here anymore.
29:16Whoa!
29:17Whoa!
29:19As the designated
29:20sensitive male,
29:21maybe you should
29:22speak to Richard.
29:28This isn't a case
29:29about the mating
29:30habits of the male
29:30species.
29:32It's about
29:33did she break
29:33the law or not.
29:35The law says
29:36sex for money
29:38is a crime
29:38sitting over there
29:39as a prostitute.
29:41Proud and rich,
29:43I grant you.
29:44But still,
29:45a person
29:46who gives
29:47sex for a fee.
29:50That's a crime.
29:52You all know it.
30:00Mr. Cage,
30:01no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
30:31Hypocrisy troubles me greatly.
30:42Today's biggest and brightest film actresses make upwards of $10 million per picture.
30:47They only rise to that level, however, if they're willing to simulate sex acts on camera.
30:53I say simulate.
30:55That's merely for the intercourse.
30:57The kissing, the nibbling on nipples, the sticking of tongues and ears and mouths,
31:01the groping of breasts and thighs, hands on penises, groins.
31:06That's real.
31:08It's actually going on.
31:12These actresses may tell us they're doing it for some redeeming social value.
31:16Well, that and a million bucks happens at lesser levels.
31:26Women employees have sometimes been known to gratify their male superiors
31:30in hopes that a promotion may ensue.
31:32It's not a noble thing, but it happens sometimes.
31:38We don't jail them.
31:40I've known many women who wouldn't consider a man marriage material,
31:44unless his income was in a certain bracket.
31:46I don't respect that, but it happens.
31:48Women married for money.
31:50We don't jail them.
31:54The truth is, sex has always been a currency for women.
32:01Always.
32:03Though often, at a quid pro blurry quo, my client was honest.
32:08She told the truth to that man and to you.
32:13I apologize.
32:28Hypocrisy always gives me such pause.
32:33Let's all take a moment.
32:34I apologize.
32:34I apologize.
32:34I apologize.
32:36Hypocrisy always gives me such pause.
32:38Let's all take a moment.
32:38Let's all take a moment.
32:42John, it's not that you didn't give a gifted closing.
32:53I prefer to hold all thoughts till after the verdict.
32:55I find it lends greater perspective.
32:58Perspective bogs me down.
33:03Do you personally subscribe to everything you said in your closing?
33:08You mean about hypocrisy giving me pause?
33:13No, no.
33:13About how acceptable it is for women to use sex as currency.
33:19Did I say acceptable?
33:21Yes.
33:24Yes.
33:25Yes.
33:26You basically argued that a little prostitution, what's the big deal?
33:29And at some level, all women sell sex to get ahead.
33:33Allie, if you probe both yourself and the situation, there's a reason I made that argument.
33:39Which is?
33:41I was paid to.
33:48That was a fishism.
33:53Excuse me.
33:54Angela.
33:55Hey.
33:56He called off the wedding.
34:00He did?
34:01What you said.
34:02It made an impression.
34:06He decided he should hold out for the woman of his dreams.
34:10Oh.
34:13Angela.
34:15Angela, I am the last person who should be giving advice of the heart to anybody.
34:19I mean, look at me.
34:20I am a strong, working career girl who feels empty without a man.
34:25The National Organization for Women, they have a contract out on my head.
34:28But, see, I am defending a prostitute with arguments like sex is more currency than love these days.
34:38And I see some of my friends getting married because, gee, they're good companions and they happen to have the same ideas about public versus private school issues.
34:47And I just can't buy it.
34:50Harry should marry somebody who he loves more than life.
34:59And you deserve to be with somebody who loves you like that.
35:06People like me and Harry, we don't get the partners of our dreams.
35:09Harry asked me if he should marry somebody, not because she's the one, but because she's the only and...
35:22Do you really think there's somebody out there wanting to take care of Harry?
35:26Harry, sometimes, when you hold out for everything, you walk away with nothing.
35:36Remember that the next time a fat man walks in asking you for advice.
35:39Why can't I give advice to whoever?
35:51I mean, I obviously have love all figured out.
35:53Good night, my summer, good night, my love.
35:59Sleep tight, my summer, sleep tight, my love.
36:07A star is shining its brightest light.
36:13For good night, my love, good night.
36:19When you feel that you can make it all alone.
36:29I don't know what you could have done differently.
36:32Do you think?
36:34I don't know.
36:35Maybe I have encouraged him to hold out for the illusion of marriage,
36:39and the reality is that now he could end up alone.
36:41Allie, if he doesn't love her...
36:43He loves her.
36:43She just doesn't make his heart bounce.
36:46And it should, shouldn't it?
36:48I mean, not all the time, but at least on your wedding day,
36:51his heart should do a little hop at the ceremony, shouldn't it?
36:54Yeah.
36:57Just ask her on me
37:02on me
37:06Pretty quick verdict, actually.
37:10Hey, Johnny.
37:11Great closing yesterday.
37:13Passing out any questionnaires?
37:14That was uncalled for.
37:16See you in there.
37:17Allie, I know you've had some trouble with the defense we put on.
37:21Oh, you're doing what you have to.
37:23Could you excuse me a second?
37:29Harry, what's going on?
37:31You wouldn't by any chance be quoting him off-season rates, would you?
37:34I beg your pardon.
37:36Could you excuse us, please?
37:40What were you discussing with her?
37:41Where you call off your wedding, and now you, you...
37:43I think you should marry Angela.
37:48Really?
37:50Companionship and trust.
37:51Those are real things, Harry.
37:53What about my heart?
37:55Yeah.
37:55I was thinking, and sometimes the worst thing for somebody's heart could be loneliness.
38:07And listen, last night I was thinking about all of my friends who I thought might be right for you, and I'm ashamed to say this, but none of my friends would go out with you.
38:23Because of my heft.
38:28Yeah.
38:28Probably.
38:29So you think I should settle for Angela?
38:35I don't think you should think of it as settling.
38:44Not if you want a family and, and partnership.
38:47Sometimes, Harry, we gotta look at our choices and we just have to make the best one.
38:53And, Angela, she's a good girl.
39:00Yeah.
39:03She is.
39:06And promises that we make ourselves when we're kids.
39:12Stupid, anyway.
39:14I apologize.
39:34Has the jury reached its verdict?
39:37We have, Your Honor.
39:39What say you?
39:40We find the defendant not guilty.
39:43Now, members of the jury, thank you for your time and service.
39:47We're done.
39:48Return.
39:49Thank you so much.
39:52And thank you for sitting here in apparent support.
39:54I'm sure it helped.
39:56It, it was apparent, Sandra.
39:59I'm, my, my outlook's just a little different from yours.
40:03I know.
40:05And I envy you.
40:09I really do.
40:13Are you lost?
40:20We won.
40:29What are you doing?
40:31After each case, I, I, I like to gather thoughts.
40:34I have great news.
40:35Harry and Angela are back on.
40:37Friday night service.
40:38Great.
40:39Angela called.
40:40She said since you pulled a cupid, she would like you there after all.
40:43As long as you don't wear white.
40:44Thank you, Elaine.
40:49I resent this side of the door.
40:51Do you really want to know my thoughts, John?
40:53I think the world is in big, big trouble.
40:56We laugh at people for aspiring to romance.
40:58We, we celebrate hookers under the guise of feminine autonomy.
41:01Do you, do you want me to put this in writing?
41:03Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.
41:06Why do you do that da, da, da, da, da, da, da thing?
41:10I stutter.
41:11I did as a child, anyway.
41:13I learned to control it with music.
41:15I, I would sing the song John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt.
41:18His name is my name, too.
41:19You know the song.
41:21Yeah.
41:21I sing to myself to control my stutter if I feel myself nervous.
41:28And sometimes a refrain just kind of pops out.
41:31Anyway.
41:33I didn't come to collect your thoughts.
41:35I came to give you mine.
41:38Criminal law requires that criminal lawyers play a certain game.
41:42I know.
41:44You don't have to apologize for the system or for your little performance.
41:48I get it.
41:49I did not come in here to apologize.
41:50I came...
41:52Da, da, da, da, da, da.
41:55The world is no longer a romantic place.
41:59Some of its people still are, however.
42:03And therein lies the promise.
42:10Don't let the world win, Ally McBeal.
42:13That's what I came in to say.
42:27He's a strange little biscuit, isn't he?
42:29I don't know what it is that makes me love you, son.
42:37I only know I never want to let you go.
42:41Because you started something that you see.
42:46That ever since we met you had a hold on me.
42:51It happens to be true.
42:55I only want to let you go.
42:56I only want to be with you.
43:00It doesn't matter where you go or what you do.
43:05I want to spend each moment of the day with you.
43:10Look what has happened with just one kiss.
43:15I never knew that I could be in love like this.
43:20It's crazy, but it's true.
43:24I only want to be with you.
43:50You stinker.
44:08You stinker.