My Husband Transitioned - And The Church 'Restricted' Us Love Don't Judge

ALLYSSA 51, and Andrea 47 from St. George, Utah grew up in the Mormon church. When they began dating, Allyssa was a typical-looking man known as Kevin, but early in their relationship, she told Andrea that she felt very connected to feminine energy and found value in presenting female. "Kevin told me in the beginning before we were married that she liked more feminine things," Andrea explained. "I really didn't have any concerns. I just thought, okay, I need to make this where it's easy for her to feel comfortable with me. So I started doing things that I thought were important as a woman and introduced her to some of those things that were important to me." For Allyssa, acceptance was vital for trust in their relationship: "Andrea was amazing in the beginning, she created some experiences for us and for me and it led to the most beautiful relationship because it was honest, authentic and it was vulnerable." Despite the understanding in their marriage, once Allyssa came out and introduced herself to the world on social media the couple suffered abuse in the comments. They do a two-hour live stream twice a week, where they answer people's questions and hope to educate others on the trans experience. "I read the comments while we're live, and there's a lot," Andrea said. "Comments like if you go in the bathroom, you'll come out in a body bag." They also had their membership restricted in the Mormon church and their access to certain places and ceremonies removed. Allyssa explained that: "It's not that we left the church, the church left us. One morning we woke up and there was a new policy that said, if you are in this community, if you're transgender, then you will have restricted membership." Adding that, "all of a sudden, faith wasn't enough." This impacted Andrea too, "because I support Allyssa. I don’t have any of those rights anymore," she said. Nevertheless, Allyssa explained that the community around them still supported them with open arms, "the truth is we have not received a lot of negativities or hate from this community. This community has really reached out and said: 'Hey, I know you're in a tough spot because of the church's position and I'm sorry you're in that spot, but I want you to know that we still care about you and we still love you. And I'm sorry.'"

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