Vibbs | Lowering The Bar
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00:00 So it doesn't just feel like a skull, so it's not clemer.
00:03 Very soft.
00:04 It does have soft skin.
00:05 Welcome to Lowering the Bar, I'm your host Vibs.
00:07 This week we'll be playing a game called Guess That Face, where Barstool employees will master
00:11 the sense of touch by guessing what face they are touching.
00:15 Sounds easy?
00:17 How will Barstool employees handle it?
00:19 Find out.
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00:47 That's barebottomclothing.com/bar.
00:48 Now, on to the episode.
00:51 Welcome back to the bar.
00:52 Yes.
00:53 Joey, welcome back to Lowering the Bar.
00:54 I ask you please sanitize your hands.
00:57 We honor.
00:58 We are going to be touching a face.
01:02 Do you think you can identify one of your coworkers by touching just their face?
01:06 It would depend on who it is.
01:08 Like, who would be the easiest?
01:10 Big Ev, probably.
01:11 Big Ev.
01:12 Can you joke set the same joke?
01:15 Big Ev would be pretty easy too.
01:16 Yeah.
01:17 Because it'd be like grabbing a bowl of fat.
01:25 Like a bunch of chicken cutlets that are uncooked.
01:28 I'm definitely one of them for sure.
01:29 Because anyone with a beard, I've got a very round face.
01:33 One of the rounder ones you'll see.
01:36 So I'd say me, probably.
01:37 I'm definitely up there.
01:38 Tommy Smokes, he's a giant nose.
01:39 Thank you.
01:40 Thank you.
01:41 I've been saying that all day.
01:42 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:43 Easily.
01:44 No question.
01:45 I mean, like, his whole face is nose.
01:46 Tommy's got a hell of a nose on him.
01:49 Feidelberg has a very unique shape.
01:52 Barelli has a bunch of chins.
01:56 Pat would have a cock in his mouth.
01:58 So I asked you to sanitize your hands.
01:59 Today we are going to be playing Guess That Face.
02:02 Again.
02:03 No, that was what's in the box.
02:05 You didn't know there was a human head in that box.
02:07 Okay, yeah, that's fair.
02:08 That could have been anything.
02:09 As Frank the Tank said, "Is it a cat?"
02:11 We are going to blindfold you with Frank the Tank's Arsenal scarf and lead you-
02:16 That's been washed, right?
02:17 To the room.
02:18 You know, in the four years we've been here, I don't think it has been washed once.
02:23 All right, so we're moving locations.
02:25 Yes.
02:26 I'll tell you what.
02:27 Now I've got to think, are we even doing what you're saying we're doing?
02:32 See, you're going to go in there and you're going to sit down in a chair.
02:37 I thought about just saying there's a chair there and having people sit down and then
02:40 just watching them fall.
02:41 That would be the whole video.
02:42 100% you could do that.
02:43 Future episode.
02:44 Then no one would trust me ever again.
02:47 Are you ready to guess that face?
02:50 Let's do it.
02:51 All right.
02:52 All right, you're right in front of the chair.
02:53 I'm not going to sit on a whipped cream pie, am I?
02:56 You just sat on a whipped cream pie.
02:58 God damn it.
02:59 If I ever go blind, just give me a gun and I'll try to shoot myself.
03:05 The subject will be to your right.
03:07 Okay.
03:08 Put your face-
03:09 This feels like an HR violation.
03:10 It is.
03:11 It is 1000% HR.
03:12 So I'm going to take your hand and put it on his face.
03:16 Can I just go crazy?
03:17 Go crazy touching it.
03:18 You get three guesses.
03:21 Now they are wearing a face honing device that makes you hone in on their face.
03:26 What the fuck does that mean?
03:27 Wait, what do you mean?
03:31 You're touching the face honing device.
03:32 I was going to say, someone has plastic in their head.
03:33 It's a man.
03:34 I think.
03:35 It is a man.
03:36 Oh, okay.
03:37 It's a beard.
03:38 Why are you so hot?
03:39 Warm.
03:40 It is a warm face.
03:41 Ah, it's got a beard.
03:42 Okay, definitely a guy.
03:43 Yes.
03:44 A little bit of stubble.
03:53 So it's not Tommy Smokes.
03:54 I know it's not Hubs.
03:55 I saw Nate outside.
03:56 Who has just sort of a shitty facial hair, like an effort to look like a man, but they're
04:10 not really, they're not really fooling anybody.
04:12 Go to town, feeling it.
04:14 All right, Tommy Smokes.
04:16 Not Tommy Smokes.
04:17 You have two more guesses.
04:18 How is this person's skin?
04:20 The skin is fine.
04:22 I feel like I don't know this person well enough to be touching them though.
04:25 Let me feel again.
04:27 We're all family here at Barstool Sports.
04:29 Wait, there's a little whisker.
04:30 Very soft.
04:31 It does have soft skin.
04:32 Who agreed to do this?
04:36 That's the biggest clue you'll get is who has time to sit in a room and have their face
04:41 touched.
04:42 I'm going to say it's Fights again just because I like the film of grease over their face.
04:50 It is not Fights.
04:52 It is someone else that is just as greasy.
04:55 Just as greasy?
04:56 Me, Phil?
04:57 What's this, a head?
04:58 That is a, like a Pepsi can box.
05:01 My God, I have no, I couldn't stop braising on my hand.
05:05 I don't really know, but I'm going to say Jack Mack.
05:07 It is not Jack Mack.
05:09 Fuck.
05:10 That might be insulting to whoever's sitting there.
05:12 This is what it's like to be blind.
05:15 Oh man.
05:16 Good skin.
05:17 Nice forehead.
05:18 I can't feel their hair.
05:19 All right, so I'm feeling some significant chin hairs.
05:22 I'm going to go man.
05:23 Narrow that down.
05:25 Do you think any of the women here could grow a beard if they tried?
05:28 Not this level of stubble.
05:29 I'd be of that much credit.
05:31 Rumor has it Kelly Keegs can grow a beard if she doesn't shave for a week.
05:36 John Foley.
05:37 You got half of it right.
05:38 This man has a jaw that could cut glass.
05:41 Keep feeling if you need.
05:42 I think that might be Tommy Smokes.
05:44 It is not Tommy Smokes.
05:45 You have two guesses left.
05:46 Didn't have a big enough nose.
05:47 I don't know if he would agree to this, but he's got the, is it hubs?
05:52 It is not hubs.
05:53 I'm going to say hubs.
05:54 It is not hubs.
05:55 Really?
05:56 Okay.
05:57 Predominantly blogging.
05:58 I'm going to go one more time here.
06:02 It's probably super awkward for this person.
06:06 They love it.
06:07 Wait, touch their lips.
06:08 You can touch their lips.
06:09 You can touch their lips.
06:15 No eyebrows.
06:16 Yeah.
06:17 People have been saying very little eyebrows.
06:19 The beard is as weird as a mustache.
06:21 Oh, wait, is it Clemma?
06:23 It is not Clemma.
06:24 Oh, who has that shit on his chin?
06:27 So it doesn't just feel like a skull.
06:30 So it's not Clemma.
06:33 It's not gagging.
06:34 So it's not Fidel Berg.
06:35 It's not trying to suck my fucking fingers.
06:39 So I know it's not Fidel Berg.
06:40 Like a more of a personal hint.
06:41 I can smell someone vaping right now.
06:42 Is that a hint?
06:43 They vape.
06:44 They vape.
06:45 That is them.
06:46 Is it Tommy?
06:47 Not Tommy.
06:48 Go ahead, feel that nose and tell me if that's Tommy.
06:49 I don't want to poke them in the eyes.
06:50 Okay.
06:51 Let me find the nose for you.
06:52 I almost need to be led to the nose.
06:53 Is it Tommy?
06:54 Tommy has a cold, but he has no beard.
06:55 It is not Tommy Smokes.
06:56 Whoever this is, is sick.
06:57 His head is smoking hot.
06:58 They have a fever?
06:59 Yeah, he's got a fever.
07:00 He's got a fever.
07:01 He's got a fever.
07:02 He's got a fever.
07:05 Oh, we might want to look into that.
07:08 Also, their face is really warm, but my hands are cold.
07:11 People are saying this person might have a fever.
07:13 Oh no, is it Tommy?
07:15 No, is Tommy sick?
07:16 Is Tommy sick today?
07:17 Gross.
07:18 Pat?
07:19 Not Pat.
07:20 Hmm.
07:21 It seems like he's got a decent, nice chin on him.
07:25 I mean that complimentary wise.
07:27 No double chin, so the person feels thin, at least not fat.
07:31 Is that a content person?
07:32 I look at this man's jawline every day and say, "Wow, wish I had that."
07:43 That's not helping at all.
07:44 Let me just touch that mustache.
07:46 Some situation.
07:47 Yeah, there is a mustache.
07:49 Is it Joey?
07:50 It is not Joey.
07:51 God, it's a goatee.
07:52 Can I taste my fingers?
07:53 Yes.
07:54 It's not John Lich.
07:55 It's not it.
07:56 It's not it.
07:57 It's not it.
07:58 It's not John Lich.
08:01 It's not it.
08:02 Is it John Lich?
08:03 Yay, you did it!
08:04 Yay!
08:05 We need an alarm that goes off when you do that.
08:08 You're going behind, you're using the head.
08:11 It's only face.
08:12 It's just that face.
08:13 John Lich.
08:14 It is John Lich.
08:15 Yes!
08:16 Yes!
08:17 John Lich.
08:18 Yes!
08:19 Ding, ding, ding.
08:20 Got it?
08:21 Yeah.
08:22 You did it.
08:23 Yes!
08:24 You got it.
08:25 Alright.
08:26 And you did it without managing to insult John Lich by calling him like a greasy-
08:27 I called him clever.
08:28 I called him clever.
08:29 I did call him clever.
08:30 I did call him clever.
08:31 Oh, okay.
08:32 Yeah, Jack.
08:33 John Lich.
08:34 Yes!
08:35 Woo!
08:36 Guys, when you're last guessed, go ahead and remove that blindfold.
08:37 Good.
08:38 Good.
08:39 John Lich.
08:40 Great to be doing business with you.
08:41 It's funny, like, I wouldn't know that you had facial hair just to make a picture.
08:47 Yeah, I normally shave it, but it gets to this point a lot.
08:50 He sits behind you.
08:55 John Lich.
08:56 Yes!
08:57 Oh!
08:58 That's John Lich.
09:00 Ah, you do have good hearing.
09:02 I made a noise.
09:03 I'm sorry.
09:04 You made a noise?
09:05 I made a noise.
09:06 That's John Lich.
09:07 Alright, I have one final guess.
09:09 Yes.
09:10 John Lich.
09:11 Yes!
09:12 Yes!
09:13 Yes!
09:14 Good job.
09:15 Oh, I know.
09:16 I know.
09:17 It's John Lich.
09:18 Correct!
09:19 Okay.
09:20 Remove your blindfold and look at John Lich.
09:21 That's the face I've been touching.
09:22 What do you think of his skincare routine?
09:23 Oh, he's got great skin.
09:24 It's awesome.
09:25 Everything's going well.
09:26 I think that's where it got me.
09:27 Yeah, good job.
09:28 Oh!
09:29 I look like I'm from the Taliban!
09:30 Oh my god.
09:31 Am I allowed to be in this position at some point?
09:35 As a person getting their...
09:37 You want your face touched?
09:38 I just, I think it's a fun game.
09:39 It is a fun game.
09:40 It is.
09:41 You kind of enjoy it.
09:42 Trent, you can, yeah, yeah.
09:43 I would love for you to be the face touchy...
09:47 You'd be a great face toucher.
09:49 I'm not saying I want to do it in a weird way, but I'm saying it's interesting.
09:52 Yeah.
09:53 Wow.
09:53 (whooshing)
09:55 (upbeat music)