Rock Thomas, once a bullied and lonely teenager with low self-esteem, transformed himself into a positive and successful individual. He founded M1, a community of high achievers, and hosts the #IAmMovement Podcast, advocating the importance of one's self-identity in achieving success.
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00:00 I felt a lack of connection because I came from a broken home.
00:04 I remember moving every single year during my elementary stages.
00:11 And every year was more difficult because you walk into the school, you don't know anybody.
00:16 They all have their friends and groups.
00:18 And I remember walking into the cafeteria, you know, you got your little lunch bag and
00:25 you're trying to figure out where to go, where you're safe really.
00:29 And I would look around the room, I'd scan the room and I would see the cool group and
00:35 I would see the nerdy group and then I'd see the cute girls and I just didn't know where
00:41 to fit in.
00:42 I was thinking to myself, "Well, you're certainly cool, you're a little skinny little kid."
00:49 And I didn't feel like nerdy or smart either, so I was somewhere in between.
00:55 So I would just sidle up somewhere and I was the type of person who would be like introverted
01:00 anyway.
01:02 I didn't really have any skills in that department.
01:04 I think I even made myself feel like an outsider.
01:06 Even if somebody accepted me, I banished myself because I was so used to being alone.
01:13 But for decades, I still felt like that lonely kid walking in the cafeteria wondering if
01:20 I'm going to be accepted.
01:21 My brother used to call me pizza face, it was his favorite thing because I had acne.
01:25 And add to that, that I was skinny and taking protein drinks because my parents were afraid
01:31 that my bones were going to break.
01:33 So now I'm skinny, I'm ugly, I'm stupid and I'm a loser.
01:39 Not a combination I would recommend for anybody that wants to have high self-esteem.
01:42 And that was kind of the beginning of me realizing that I wasn't in a supportive environment.
01:48 So what did I do?
01:49 I'd get up every morning, I'd race to the mirror.
01:51 I'd look in the mirror and I'd see if a new pimple had erupted and that was going to determine
01:55 whether I was ugly or uglier.
02:00 I remember lying in bed, praying, praying to God, asking God to please remove my pimples.
02:07 Please, pleading.
02:08 I would get down on my knees and then I would get to the mirror almost afraid for that moment
02:16 when my face would meet my face.
02:18 And I'd be like, "Oh, no, are you kidding me?"
02:22 I'd be in the weirdest places, right on the lip, under the nose.
02:27 And I used women's makeup.
02:29 I would go out and stand out in the sun trying to have the acne dry and nothing seemed to
02:34 work.
02:35 And then my brother would just drive it in deeper.
02:39 Loser, bone dog, pizza face.
02:42 But that wasn't the problem.
02:44 The biggest problem was that I kept on repeating it to myself.
02:48 And for years, even walking into a cocktail room or walking into a training, I still felt
02:54 those same words.
02:56 So we play small inside and then we play small outside and we end up living this life of
03:00 quiet desperation.
03:02 Everybody has a pizza face.
03:04 Somebody once said to you something that touched you.
03:06 If I called you purple ears, you probably wouldn't care.
03:09 But if I said something that you thought was true, that would separate you from other people,
03:16 you'd probably review it over and over again just like I did.
03:21 But then I met a mentor that changed my life.
03:23 He taught me that I could rewire that.
03:25 He said that you have software, Rock.
03:27 The people in your environment have uploaded and suggested pizza face to you and that you
03:31 don't have to buy that.
03:32 You don't have to keep on telling yourself you're pizza face.
03:34 You can change the recording.
03:35 I'm like, "You can?"
03:36 He goes, "Yeah."
03:37 It's not a truth.
03:39 It's true to you, but it's not true for truth's sake.
03:43 But the problem is wherever you go, there you are.
03:47 And I took that little identity that I have inside of me.
03:50 The words that follow I am follow you.
03:53 Whatever you're saying to yourself, "I am," is who you become and it's how you define
03:57 yourself.
03:58 And the thing is that you can change that in a heartbeat.
04:01 If somebody asks you, "How are you?"
04:02 And you say, "I am fine.
04:04 I'm tired.
04:05 I'm a loser.
04:06 I'm having a rough day."
04:07 You're defining yourself every day.
04:09 The problem is people don't realize it.
04:12 And what do most people do?
04:13 "How are you?"
04:14 "Not bad."
04:15 "What about phenomenal?"
04:16 "What about blessed?"
04:17 "What about excited?"
04:18 "We can't do that because when you do that, the world responds to you how?"
04:22 "Oh yeah, easy for you.
04:25 I'm having a rough time over here."
04:27 Yet the labels come and they're offered to us by other people.
04:30 Our parents, the people who are our guardians, our brothers and sisters in my case.
04:33 Who's giving you labels?
04:35 Who's telling you who you should be?
04:38 You can rewrite that and you get to redefine yourself if you want to.
04:43 Who are you?
04:43 [Music]