The Ranchero Returns Part 2! Alaska or Bust, the Sequel - Roadkill Episode 14
On this episode of Roadkill
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MotorTranscript
00:00 Yeah, we're freezing our nuts off in the Yukon,
00:02 because we're on our way to Alaska in the Ranchero for ice racing.
00:05 And hunting moose with the front bumper.
00:08 [MUSIC]
00:27 Last time on Roadkill, we set out from El Segundo, California in our '68 Ford Ranchero,
00:32 and made it 2,000 miles into Canada with only minor issues.
00:36 One of which was a wiring short that started to cause our lights to flicker.
00:39 I didn't know this was legal in Canada, but apparently you can buy fireworks in a gas station.
00:45 And so we decided to set them off in the middle of nowhere,
00:48 which is right when our battery and our headlights died.
00:51 Because all of our lights shut off after a few minutes of running,
00:54 we assumed our high output fog lights were pulling too many amps from the system.
00:58 So we disconnected everything but the headlights so we could keep on trucking.
01:02 We thought we had the car dialed, but when we got back on the road,
01:04 we were apparently driving without any tail lights.
01:06 [MUSIC]
01:18 13 degrees.
01:19 Now it's getting serious.
01:23 Wow, 13 degrees.
01:25 The Windex is frozen, the car is frozen.
01:27 We didn't crack the block somehow.
01:30 I was genuinely worried about that, but I think we're gonna be okay.
01:34 Made it through another day.
01:36 [MUSIC]
01:41 The Elkhead Highway never fails to provide awesome scenery,
01:44 and I've done it both the summer and the winter.
01:46 Winter is way cooler.
01:48 Come on, where's the animals?
01:52 You wanna hit something?
01:53 I want an animal obstacle course right now.
01:57 I wanna slalom through a bison, a moose, and a muskrat.
02:01 And a bear.
02:01 Any minute now, a bison's gonna wander up the road, we're gonna cream it.
02:07 We're gonna smack.
02:08 It's gonna take a fistful of Ranchero.
02:10 [MUSIC]
02:14 It's roads like this that turn that 320 mile,
02:17 no big deal drive into a 12 hour affair.
02:19 [MUSIC]
02:24 I admire the guys who just hop on their snowmobile and
02:27 crank along the side of the road here.
02:30 I don't admire them as much as I'm jealous of them, cuz that's just fun.
02:34 They've probably got like Brandy and a little Buddha bag there.
02:40 They got their Saint Bernard with them with the Brandy and the-
02:42 Oh, yeah.
02:43 The little barrel under their neck.
02:44 Is that only happening in cartoons?
02:46 You ever seen a Saint Bernard?
02:49 Yeah, I have.
02:50 Or an ostrich.
02:52 Or a bison.
02:52 You've seen ostrich?
02:55 I was there.
02:56 Yeah, that was the first time.
02:57 There's an ostrich.
03:00 Holy crap.
03:01 I've never seen an ostrich before.
03:03 You never have?
03:04 Look, buffalo.
03:05 Wait, is that a buffalo?
03:06 Those are buffalo.
03:07 Holy crap.
03:07 You're right.
03:08 Have you ever seen one in real life?
03:10 I've never seen that or an ostrich in real life.
03:12 Have you ever seen a moose?
03:14 Not in real life.
03:15 Bear?
03:16 Not in real life.
03:17 Elk?
03:18 Nope.
03:19 Very sheltered.
03:21 This is our first wildlife spotting.
03:40 It's a little bit weak, but we're really excited about it.
03:44 That's a bison.
03:45 It's one.
03:46 There's no pack running down the street at us.
03:48 You've ridden that thing at the bar.
03:51 You can do it.
03:52 I now have a photo to prove the intelligence of Mike Finnegan.
03:58 It's like he's playing possum right now.
04:00 Like any minute now, he's just going to charge.
04:02 I'm honking our horn, which sounds a lot like what I think a bison should sound like.
04:15 Everything we touch works perfect.
04:17 I'm about to teach the bison how to do a burnout.
04:20 Sometimes I think that Finnegan's experience with wildlife is limited to like mosquitoes.
04:33 It's one bison.
04:35 Little did he know that just half an hour down the road,
04:37 we're going to run into a whole pack of them.
04:39 Wow, those things are huge.
04:44 They are.
04:44 Look, he's crossing the road.
04:46 Oh, wow.
04:47 He doesn't care.
04:47 Another guy crossing the road.
04:49 You're going to have to stop.
04:51 Why did the buffalo cross the road?
04:54 He didn't like the ranchero.
04:56 Like they're smart, right?
04:59 Like he's circling around.
05:00 Yeah.
05:01 Oh, you think they're going to...
05:02 They're going to circle the wagons on us.
05:03 Pay us back for oppressing their people.
05:07 I don't know if you've noticed, but they really don't care.
05:09 Oh, yeah?
05:10 Oh, you're right.
05:12 They are circling the wagons on us.
05:14 See this?
05:14 See?
05:15 I hate to break this to you, but...
05:18 Look how fast.
05:19 See? He's running.
05:20 They're running, dude.
05:21 Yeah, they're now running.
05:23 For sure.
05:23 How many stupid tourists get killed doing this every year?
05:27 All of them, I think.
05:27 Are we them?
05:29 Oh my God, look at this one, dude.
05:30 Where?
05:31 He's right behind us.
05:31 Look.
05:32 Oh, cool.
05:32 Okay, I'm going to go.
05:38 I'm going to...
05:39 Yeah, going.
05:40 Here we go.
05:41 Okay.
05:42 He didn't care.
05:43 All right.
05:44 There's a little baby.
05:44 Sorry to be tourists.
05:46 See you later.
05:48 Yeah.
05:55 Who says you need fuel injection when you have a carburetor?
05:59 Okay, maybe it would help.
06:03 For the first time, we plugged in the oil pan heater and battery heater.
06:10 Not bad.
06:11 Hooray, carburetor.
06:12 It's a little cold.
06:13 This morning when I poured the oil in it, it looked like motor honey.
06:18 It was really thick.
06:20 If that coolant temperature gauge could go backwards, it would right now.
06:23 Holy crap, it's cold today.
06:26 So we've got a horn that the longer you hold it down, the louder it gets.
06:30 We've got an ignition switch that only works some of the time.
06:33 Headlights that turn off after about five minutes if you turn the high beams on.
06:38 Air shocks that leak.
06:41 Other than that, we're pretty good.
06:42 I think we're going to make it.
06:43 I think this is the year that we get to Alaska.
06:46 Oh, jinxed us.
06:50 Oh, that was a bad one.
07:06 That was good.
07:13 Big props on that.
07:15 Like you least expected.
07:18 This deal started in World War II when they were building the Alaska Highway and soldiers,
07:33 just to have that sense of home, would bring their hometown sign and put it on a post.
07:37 And it's exploded into like, I guess, more than a city block here of signpost forest.
07:43 It's pretty cool.
07:45 Awesome.
07:46 All right, let's get back in the car with the heaters.
07:47 Did I just hear Finnegan chicken out?
07:49 Yes, I did.
07:51 I think I'll go do the same.
07:58 That's 2,700 miles so far in a 45-year-old automobile with a carburetor.
08:02 Which has given us no trouble.
08:05 In February.
08:06 When it's one degree.
08:07 You realize we're only 800 miles away from success, right?
08:15 You realize that we've already done seven days and 2,700 miles?
08:20 And I haven't killed you yet.
08:23 It's unbelievable.
08:25 Nobody's died.
08:26 It's a long trip.
08:27 No animals have been harmed.
08:29 No gas stations have been exploded with fireworks.
08:31 Yet.
08:32 All positive.
08:33 This is the part where we get creamed by a bear right now.
08:37 We'll cross the border tomorrow.
08:39 And then we have to make it to Big Lake for the ice rinks.
08:43 I'm gonna go drift this parking lot.
08:45 I like this parking lot.
08:46 Nice.
08:50 Good one.
08:52 Ooh, I like it.
08:53 That was quality.
08:55 That had style.
08:55 Ready?
08:57 Sure.
08:57 Yeah, all the way around.
09:04 Ready?
09:05 Yeah, perfection.
09:12 Except for a little snowbank action.
09:14 There are two things in life that I know without a doubt.
09:17 You can never have too much horsepower.
09:19 And you can never do too many donuts.
09:21 I cannot help myself from daydreaming about ripping around that racetrack.
09:25 Okay, let's get out of here before we get arrested.
09:27 All right, I think we're done.
09:28 When we just made it into Canada, the starter almost fell off the 363 motor.
09:35 And now it's done it again about 1,800 miles later.
09:38 Whitehorse has been the biggest city we've been to in the last two, three days.
09:44 And thank God we're here because the starter's falling out again because
09:47 the bolts really need some sort of thread-locking paste on them.
09:51 And we found a Nappa, got that.
09:53 We'll jack up the car one more time, hopefully reattach the starter permanently.
09:57 With any luck, no more issues till we're into Alaska.
10:01 And then we'll have major issues, but it won't matter.
10:03 Hey, Finnegan.
10:12 We're now to the part of the trip where I like to hit the reset button and just kind of clean
10:18 and organize because I can't find anything anymore because Freiburger just likes to do
10:21 this with stuff.
10:22 And you see what happens when you do that.
10:24 Yard sale.
10:26 While he's under the car freezing his nuts off and getting oily and dirty,
10:30 I think I'll just clean up back here.
10:32 I think I'm losing my mind.
10:34 I don't know what day it is anymore.
10:37 I'm ready to be done.
10:39 That helps a lot.
10:45 Best day at work ever.
10:49 Best day at work ever.
10:50 Those are fully tight and loctited.
10:58 All right.
10:59 And if they come loose again...
11:00 Hook the battery back up?
11:02 Tack welding them in.
11:02 No, because the starter is still dangling freely here.
11:05 You were faster at this the last time.
11:07 This is true.
11:09 I'm just letting you know for your own personal information.
11:11 Maybe it was the snowball to the nuts that sort of reduced the efficiency.
11:17 Just got to check the timing and good to go.
11:19 Hit the road.
11:20 This thing changes its mind about idle quality all the time.
11:23 Rev it again?
11:24 It's like the weights aren't returning, right?
11:27 It's only 25 degrees according to this.
11:39 It's idling really fast though.
11:42 Yeah, it is.
11:43 So the difference is,
11:44 David's smacking the distributor and rotating it counterclockwise
11:48 because in a Ford, that's the direction the rotor rotates.
11:51 Counterclockwise.
11:52 So that's going to retard the timing a little bit
11:55 and hopefully stop this thing from pinging.
11:57 Our problem is, although we have a timing light,
11:59 we're not sure that the timing pointer on the balancer is reading correctly.
12:03 So kind of flying blind here.
12:05 We're winging the motor like four grand setting the timing
12:10 and it is making some nice noise.
12:12 So finally, this French teacher comes down to yell at us
12:15 and short version is no parlez-vous Flowmaster.
12:18 She told us to get lost.
12:20 They're disturbing the peace with their loud hot rods.
12:23 Oh, this is the honorary French console.
12:26 We got yelled at by the Frenchies.
12:28 Once we left Whitehorse,
12:39 we really were at the most desolate part of the Alcan.
12:41 We're only 80 miles from the border.
12:50 We're this close to getting Alaska
12:52 and I don't want anything to stop us from crossing the border.
12:55 So we've got to stop and blow up the last of our illegal fireworks.
12:58 That was 40 bucks.
13:01 Apparently it's too cold.
13:03 I got ripped off.
13:04 Yeah, my hands are freezing.
13:05 Try lighting it in the car.
13:06 I have made fire.
13:07 Cup to fire.
13:08 Oh, wow.
13:09 Okay.
13:12 Gonna go out.
13:15 Gas-soaked cardboard won't burn 17 degrees.
13:19 I think he's just gonna kick the fireworks down the hill.
13:24 Run!
13:29 Oh my god.
13:31 It better be good.
13:32 Yeah!
13:34 Wow!
13:36 That's loud!
13:38 That was great.
13:40 That was worth the 20 minutes.
13:42 Yeah, let's do the next one.
13:44 Oh, that one broke.
13:46 Oh, that one had value.
13:48 We're parting like it's 1995.
13:50 All right, last couple.
13:52 We're done.
13:54 Oh, that's a good one.
13:56 Oh, that's a good one.
13:58 Oh, that's a good one.
14:00 [Music]
14:02 [Music]
14:04 [Music]
14:06 I now know what true cold feels like.
14:08 All the locals will laugh at us for being cold at only 16 degrees.
14:12 Did you hear that guy say, "We don't worry about it until it's minus 60"?
14:16 This part of the Alcan, this is like going off-road.
14:20 It's been like driving on a dirt road.
14:22 Whoa! That was a good one for quite a while.
14:24 I like Canada.
14:26 It's been good.
14:28 It's starting to just get better, though.
14:30 That means we win 14 months of eating crow for not making this trip.
14:36 We're finally going to get there.
14:38 Don't speak too soon.
14:40 80 miles is big for us.
14:42 The hood is still on the car, even though we don't have a chrome air cleaner.
14:46 I say the car is fine.
14:48 Oh, it's because it has racing stripes.
14:50 That's why it's fine.
14:52 Those add horsepower.
14:54 [Engine revving]
14:56 [Music]
14:58 I hope they let us in.
15:00 I know.
15:02 Won't that be funny?
15:04 They're like, "Go back. You're wearing too much flannel."
15:06 Welcome to the United States of America.
15:10 Yeah.
15:12 Turn the gear off, please.
15:14 Oh, did you see that?
15:16 I just got retina scanned.
15:18 Oh, yeah.
15:20 I see you guys finally made it.
15:22 I saw you on YouTube.
15:24 You went to Idaho and got that old Chevy.
15:28 You're kidding me.
15:30 That is so cool.
15:32 You said, "Forget it."
15:34 This is the original car.
15:36 You had an overhaul.
15:38 You had some problems.
15:40 I saw it on YouTube.
15:42 That's unbelievable.
15:44 That's so cool.
15:46 We have a lot to declare.
15:48 Number one, we're awesome.
15:50 Number two, there's three bottles of beer in there we forgot to drink and some leftover fireworks.
15:52 You're in America, not California.
15:54 Oh!
15:56 Best welcome to America ever.
15:58 Thank you.
16:00 That's unbelievable.
16:04 Wow.
16:06 [Music]
16:22 We're driving down this road,
16:24 and there's a guy standing on the seat of his snowmobile at the side of the road,
16:28 and he's waving at us, so we pull over.
16:30 He runs up to the window and goes, "You're David Freiberger."
16:32 You ever been on a sled?
16:34 No.
16:36 Yes.
16:38 Go? Really? Yeah.
16:40 Dude, it's not every day Freiberger's in Alaska, dude.
16:42 We're about to go snowmobiling.
16:46 We ran into some awesome people who traded us their much more expensive,
16:50 much nicer, much newer snowmobiles for this crappy Ranchero.
16:54 Not a bad deal.
16:56 Here you go.
16:58 She's all yours.
17:00 It does really good donuts, so you don't even need reverse to turn around.
17:02 Rope over.
17:04 Okay.
17:06 Throttle, and it's an automatic clutch, so you kind of burp your throttle a little bit to get yourself rolling.
17:10 Yep.
17:12 And just head across the road and hang a lap.
17:14 We all met at a bar about five miles down the road.
17:20 Complete trusting strangers who threw us the keys to machines that are worth ten times what the Ranchero is worth.
17:28 As awesome as a hundred mile an hour snowmobile is, we really only had one thing on our minds,
17:34 and that was getting to the ice races the next day.
17:36 Fourteen months ago we decided we were going to do this, and the reason was we had seen a YouTube video of action out here on the ice.
17:56 That's all we really knew about it.
17:58 Mostly import cars in three different classes running all in one pack around this road course.
18:04 And in the middle of all of that is going to be our Ranchero.
18:08 These cars are racing, aren't they?
18:14 I have no idea. I don't know where we're going or what we're doing or what kind of racing.
18:18 I know the lake's frozen.
18:20 I probably look like a Californian showing up to Alaska, because these guys are wearing basically ball caps.
18:25 Victory!
18:29 Do I look like a California guy who arrived in Alaska?
18:32 Yes.
18:33 Yep. Perfect.
18:36 We're standing out like a Ranchero in a sea of Subarus.
18:40 Yeah, all-wheel drive everywhere. No muscle cars.
18:44 It's a road course wheel to wheel.
18:46 He said no body contact, but they haven't met me yet.
18:50 Time to celebrate.
18:54 Oh, that hurt.
18:56 I'm guessing you were expecting that to be soft.
18:59 Both of these are in my class. The Focus and I believe that's a Festiva, but I'm not sure.
19:05 I remember the commercial for this car. I remember the song.
19:08 For years, you will say, "Hey, remember that time you lost the race to the '83 Festiva?"
19:13 That's right.
19:14 Without clarifying where we were.
19:16 With your 363 cubic inch, 450 horsepower Dart motor. Remember that?
19:20 Yep.
19:21 That's my future.
19:22 This thing looks restored. It's like brand new inside.
19:25 The Skittle is going to work the Ranchero over like a rented mule.
19:30 That's the ice. I thought it was a little further down than that.
19:33 Considering I'm slipping on it with my boot, I'm looking forward to driving on it.
19:37 The only guy we had ever talked to at the Alaska Sports Car Club was this guy TJ.
19:41 Just talking to him on the phone, Finnegan goes, "I got to know what this guy looks like."
19:46 He said, "I bet he's Grizzly Adams."
19:49 I said, "No, I'll take that bet. I think he's Cleetus Snow."
19:53 We got there, and sure enough, this dude is Grizzly Adams.
19:56 I lost the bet and had to take a snowball to the face.
19:59 It is Grizzly Adams.
20:01 David Freiberger from Hot Rod.
20:03 I win the bet. You do look like Grizzly Adams.
20:07 I have to go take a snowball in the face because you look like Grizzly Adams.
20:10 That's cool.
20:11 Three, two, one.
20:16 [laughter]
20:18 I didn't win.
20:21 We did a couple of warm-up races and did okay,
20:23 but once we got out there wheel-to-wheel, it was a completely different story.
20:27 Now we have to build up, but we don't know who's going to drive in the first heat,
20:30 so we're going to do the Rochambeau.
20:32 Oh!
20:34 Oh!
20:37 Oh, you drive!
20:44 Oh, here we go.
20:45 Wow.
20:46 This is, remember, not a race. This is a parade into the race.
20:50 Oh, it is?
20:51 Yes, this is a yellow all the way around, and if we're bunched up properly, we get the green.
20:55 All right.
20:58 So you're supposed to drive like this.
21:00 My first parade lap.
21:01 And...
21:05 Green.
21:07 Okay.
21:09 Passing the festiva.
21:10 We're racing.
21:11 We are racing.
21:12 We are racing.
21:13 And I can't see.
21:15 I see Jack.
21:16 I think I'm going to semi-pass you on the Alcan.
21:19 Dive inside this guy.
21:21 All right, he's done.
21:22 Pass him. Pass him.
21:27 You passed somebody. Yeah!
21:31 I can't see the corner.
21:32 I know. There it is.
21:34 Can I go? Can I go inside?
21:36 Yes, dive in. You totally passed that guy.
21:38 Oh, backwards car.
21:41 Guys, go in the runway.
21:43 He just passed another guy.
21:44 Dude, you're owning this.
21:46 This is a yard sale.
21:47 Yard sale right now.
21:50 Dude, we're keeping up.
21:52 Yeah.
21:53 And you passed that guy.
21:54 I don't think we're going to get lapped by the festiva.
21:56 No.
21:58 Uh-oh.
22:00 Until now. Go all the way around.
22:02 Let this guy...
22:05 Damn it.
22:07 Damn.
22:09 Let this guy around.
22:11 Ice racing is frustrating in a two-wheel drive car.
22:17 They really don't belong out there.
22:19 And when you spin one out and park it on a snowbank...
22:21 You've only got two turns left.
22:23 And you're about to F it up.
22:25 Okay.
22:28 You don't have traction to get back off the snowbank.
22:30 So you end up sitting there watching other people drive by you,
22:33 waving in all-wheel drive Subarus,
22:35 having fun while they finish the race.
22:38 It was getting a little bit hot.
22:40 And it's because the ice stuffed in the engine compartment
22:43 was holding up the electric fan.
22:45 We passed, during the race, three different cars.
22:48 Many of the times sideways.
22:50 He was just learning more and more and more every lap.
22:53 And we were going faster and faster.
22:55 It was really cool.
22:56 And then I unlearned everything, spun out,
22:58 and those three guys passed me.
23:01 Remember, stay wide.
23:03 It's a long corner.
23:05 Yeah, this one is definitely...
23:07 Rotate it. There you go.
23:09 Right on.
23:14 There we go. Use the berm.
23:19 No, no, no, no!
23:22 You officially did better than me.
23:26 I'm going to have to do it again.
23:28 You officially did better than me
23:30 because you made it to the last lap.
23:32 Try reverse. You make it out of this.
23:34 I think both of us got a little bit aggressive.
23:38 And while we did pass some guys,
23:40 neither one of us could make it more than a lap or two
23:43 before we stuffed this thing into a snow berm
23:45 and had to sit there and watch the rest of the race.
23:47 Ooh, interesting. Yeah.
23:49 That had style.
23:51 There's traction there.
23:53 That had style.
23:56 Oh, shit! Oh!
23:58 Oh, you're kidding me.
24:01 Already?
24:02 Did that just happen?
24:03 That's like the first lap.
24:05 That was the first lap.
24:07 Actually, you didn't complete one lap.
24:09 He's just laughing at us.
24:15 He's smiling, but inside he's going,
24:17 "You chumps, get around the track. I'm tired of..."
24:19 I think we just ran out of gas.
24:21 Are you serious?
24:22 Oh, wow. I think you're right.
24:24 How can we have run out of gas already?
24:26 Oh!
24:28 What was that?
24:29 Might be in gear.
24:31 So, we just figured out what was wrong with the car.
24:34 When the car fired up right after you put gas in,
24:36 I go, "That started way too easy."
24:38 Yeah, we're like, "That doesn't make sense."
24:40 And I got out and I looked under the hood
24:41 and I could see it sparking
24:42 and it was melting the wire right here.
24:44 This is unbelievable.
24:45 We are pretty sure that we found the problem
24:47 we've had with this car last year and this year
24:50 with the timing and the lights flickering
24:52 and stuff like that.
24:54 There was spark jumping through the coil wire boot
24:58 directly to the wiring harness
25:01 for all the lights and everything.
25:03 And it's got to be with the problem.
25:06 It's got to be.
25:08 Remarkably, we somehow took fourth place
25:11 out of six cars in our class.
25:13 And I don't know how that works
25:14 because we only finished one heat out of five.
25:17 It took 14 months, but we did it.
25:20 This is Big Lake, Alaska,
25:22 and we survived the ice races
25:24 thanks to these guys,
25:25 the Alaska Sports Car Club.
25:27 Check them out.
25:28 Yeah!
25:29 Awesome!
25:30 And they are our destination.
25:32 Victory.
25:33 Yep.
25:35 Sorry, haters.
25:36 We didn't fail.
25:38 You know how I can tell David's angry?
25:41 There's static coming off of his flannel.
25:43 Like this toque is popped up on top of his head.
25:46 He apparently is escaping from the work right now.
25:50 Canada.
25:52 Fairly dick-like to snowball me, then leave,
25:56 but there will be retaliation.
25:58 Good save.
26:03 Hand me the camera?
26:07 All right, see ya.
26:09 We're a dick to the video, guys.
26:11 You kind of are, yeah.
26:12 You do not want to lick my nuts right now
26:14 because your tongue is guaranteed to stink.
26:16 I don't think we can use lick nuts.
26:18 But it was funny.
26:20 He's like, "We got nothing."
26:23 - Nothing.
26:23 (laughing)