The Green Hornet (2011)

PicturePerfectChannel

The Green Hornet is a 2011 American superhero comedy film based on the character of the same name by George W. Trendle (along with Fran Striker) that originated in a 1930s radio program and later appeared in movie serials, a television series, comic books and other media. Directed by Michel Gondry from a screenplay by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg, the film stars Rogen in the title role, Jay Chou, Christoph Waltz, Cameron Diaz, Edward James Olmos, David Harbour, and Tom Wilkinson. In the film, a newspaper publisher's son, following his father's sudden death, teams up with a martial arts-skilled mechanic to become crime-fighting vigilantes, attracting the attention of a Russian mobster.

Transcript

00:00:00 (dramatic music)

00:00:02 (dramatic music)

00:00:06 (dramatic music)

00:00:09 (dramatic music)

00:00:12 (dramatic music)

00:00:15 (dramatic music)

00:00:18 (dramatic music)

00:00:35 (dramatic music)

00:00:38 - The mayor doesn't want the article on gas prices

00:01:03 to go to prison until after the next quarter.

00:01:06 - Tell the mayor I'm insulted.

00:01:09 I would never jeopardize the journalistic integrity

00:01:11 of this newspaper for some rent-a-mayor's political agenda.

00:01:15 - Very well, Mr.--

00:01:16 - So, Britt.

00:01:21 Here we are again, sat home after another schoolyard fight.

00:01:28 I know you miss your mother.

00:01:31 So do I.

00:01:33 But I have to take care of 750 employees

00:01:37 and you have to take care of yourself.

00:01:39 Still, that seems to be asking too much.

00:01:45 - I was trying to stop some bullies--

00:01:46 - Trying doesn't matter when you always fail.

00:01:49 (yells)

00:01:54 (dramatic music)

00:01:57 Do you think it makes me happy to do this?

00:02:00 - Yes!

00:02:01 - No, it doesn't.

00:02:02 (laughs)

00:02:03 Not a week goes by without you finding yourself

00:02:05 in some kind of trouble.

00:02:06 Now, if you're doing this for attention,

00:02:08 you have all that I can afford to give you.

00:02:11 And you're wasting my time.

00:02:13 (dramatic music)

00:02:16 (suspenseful music)

00:02:20 (suspenseful music)

00:02:23 (suspenseful music)

00:02:26 (suspenseful music)

00:02:29 - Hey!

00:02:49 (crowd chattering)

00:02:52 - No, no, not you.

00:02:55 (suspenseful music)

00:02:58 - Have a seat.

00:03:06 Either one, they're both very comfortable.

00:03:10 - So what can I do for you?

00:03:18 - As you know, I've worked my entire life very hard

00:03:22 to achieve one goal.

00:03:24 - Uh-huh.

00:03:25 - And that goal, which I have in fact achieved,

00:03:28 was to be in charge of all the crime

00:03:31 in the city of Los Angeles.

00:03:33 Therefore, the fact that you assume

00:03:37 that you can open this establishment

00:03:40 without my permission, without payment,

00:03:41 and sell narcotics out of it is completely unacceptable.

00:03:46 - Really?

00:03:46 - And to be honest, quite insulting.

00:03:49 Therefore, you must sign over ownership

00:03:52 of this establishment to me,

00:03:54 at which time you become my employees.

00:03:57 - We're your employees?

00:03:58 - Yeah, or we close down permanently.

00:04:01 Choice is yours.

00:04:03 - Okay, how do I pronounce your name?

00:04:05 Tchaikovsky?

00:04:08 - Chudnovsky.

00:04:09 - Char, Chudovsky?

00:04:12 - Chud-nof-sky.

00:04:19 - Chudnovsky?

00:04:21 All right, Chudnovsky, kiss my ass.

00:04:24 Put your lips to my ass and kiss it.

00:04:29 French kiss it.

00:04:30 Tickle it with your gray whiskers.

00:04:32 I got bittersweet news for you.

00:04:35 You're washed up.

00:04:37 You're old, you're boring, you're not scary.

00:04:40 You dress like shit.

00:04:42 It's over for you, okay?

00:04:43 That's the bitter news.

00:04:45 Now the sweet news is, you can retire.

00:04:49 You can go play golf, eat your dinners

00:04:51 at three o'clock in the afternoon,

00:04:53 play with your grandkids, drink Metamucil.

00:04:57 Old people shit, okay?

00:05:00 Look at me.

00:05:01 I got a name people can say.

00:05:04 My name's Danny Clear.

00:05:06 I deal crystal meth.

00:05:08 People call me Crystal Clear.

00:05:10 It's easy.

00:05:12 Check out my kick-ass hangout here.

00:05:14 I got shit loads of glass everywhere.

00:05:17 I got a see-through piano.

00:05:18 Look at my boys.

00:05:20 They're pimped out.

00:05:23 We got Gucci, Armani, another Gucci, TaylorMade.

00:05:28 This is what you need to get to the top today.

00:05:33 Not hard work, not dressing like Disco Santa Claus.

00:05:37 You need charisma.

00:05:39 You look like my Uncle Greg.

00:05:40 Very nice guy, but he's a dentist.

00:05:46 Now consider this your retirement letter.

00:05:48 Boom, it's over.

00:05:52 See your way out.

00:05:54 - What, you truly don't think I'm scary?

00:06:01 - No.

00:06:04 (gunshots)

00:06:06 - Okay, okay, okay, okay.

00:06:09 You're scary.

00:06:11 Yeah, you're scary.

00:06:12 - You just said I'm not.

00:06:13 - No, no, you are, you are.

00:06:15 What's a Disco Santa?

00:06:16 - A Disco, I don't know.

00:06:18 I, sorry, it was just something stupid to say.

00:06:21 - You said I'm boring.

00:06:23 My gun has two barrels.

00:06:25 - That's not boring.

00:06:26 - And it was very difficult to make.

00:06:28 - Answer me!

00:06:31 - What?

00:06:32 - Well, what could I do to be more scary?

00:06:36 - A better name, cooler name?

00:06:38 A little more color or something.

00:06:40 Maybe, maybe, maybe you could say something

00:06:43 to people before you kill 'em, but not now.

00:06:46 It's hard to think with this double barrel in my face.

00:06:49 - Sorry.

00:06:50 You've given me a lot to think about.

00:06:57 - You're not gonna kill me?

00:07:04 Oh, I get it, you keep me alive so I can spread your legend.

00:07:08 Okay, I'll do that, man.

00:07:10 I'll spread your legend.

00:07:12 - Hey, you forgot your briefcase.

00:07:14 (explosion booms)

00:07:22 (tires screeching)

00:07:41 (dramatic music)

00:07:44 - Let's get this party crazy!

00:07:46 (gun fires)

00:07:48 (upbeat music)

00:07:51 (crowd cheering)

00:07:53 (upbeat music)

00:07:56 (crowd cheering)

00:07:59 (upbeat music)

00:08:01 (crowd cheering)

00:08:04 (crowd cheering)

00:08:15 - Behold, my lady.

00:08:30 (upbeat music)

00:08:34 ♪ There's a school of hell-bent children ♪

00:08:37 ♪ They're all locked in a nursery ♪

00:08:41 ♪ They got earphone heads ♪

00:08:43 ♪ They got dirty necks ♪

00:08:45 ♪ They're so 20th century ♪

00:08:49 ♪ Well, they queue up for the bathroom ♪

00:08:52 ♪ 'Round about 7.35 ♪

00:08:57 ♪ Don't you think we need a woman's ♪

00:08:59 ♪ Yes, we do, make you come alive ♪

00:09:04 ♪ You know good men want your head on high speed ♪

00:09:09 (man sighs)

00:09:14 (man groans)

00:09:29 - That's the good stuff.

00:09:31 Good morning.

00:09:38 - Honolly.

00:09:43 - Honolly, that's what I meant.

00:09:44 - So, is this what you want from your life?

00:09:57 This gives you a sense of fulfillment?

00:10:01 - Dad, I told you, tomorrow I'm enrolling

00:10:04 in ITT Technical Institute,

00:10:06 and I'm gonna fix computers for a living, so I--

00:10:09 - Howdy.

00:10:10 I spend all night writing an editorial

00:10:13 about the nausea this town has come to inspire,

00:10:16 about the corruption, the violence, and the decadence

00:10:20 that we've come to expect as part of our daily life.

00:10:22 And I have to turn the page.

00:10:27 And see my own son's contribution to this mayhem.

00:10:30 - Sweet, I'm in the paper.

00:10:36 - Now, you may think you're humiliating me,

00:10:38 but you're humiliating yourself.

00:10:41 - Okay, I'm sorry.

00:10:42 Look, if you don't like it,

00:10:42 why don't you just ask them not to print it?

00:10:43 It's your newspaper.

00:10:45 - I can't, because unfortunately, it's news.

00:10:47 - That's a good point, I guess.

00:10:49 - I kept myself out of the papers for years.

00:10:50 Now, do me a favor and do the same.

00:10:53 And I told you, stop taking girls into my garage.

00:10:57 You do it again, I'll change the lock.

00:11:01 - Okay, but can you sign this for me?

00:11:06 - Yeah.

00:11:07 Never stop the party.

00:11:13 (water trickling)

00:11:16 (gentle music)

00:11:20 (car horn honking)

00:11:23 ♪ The image and the style that you're used to ♪

00:11:33 ♪ I look funny ♪

00:11:35 ♪ But yo, I'm making money, see ♪

00:11:36 ♪ So yo, world, I hope you're ready for me ♪

00:11:38 ♪ Now gather 'round ♪

00:11:39 ♪ I'm a new fool in town ♪

00:11:40 ♪ And my sound's laid down by the underground ♪

00:11:43 ♪ I'm the king of all the hemispheres ♪

00:11:44 ♪ You got on your shelf ♪

00:11:45 ♪ So just let me introduce myself ♪

00:11:47 ♪ My name is Humpty ♪

00:11:48 ♪ Oh, paparazzi in the house ♪

00:11:51 ♪ Change the channel ♪

00:11:52 - Breaking news, and wait,

00:11:53 I think we may have our first visual on Rick Reed.

00:11:56 Go, go, go, go, go, get in there.

00:11:58 - Hello?

00:11:58 - Get in there, get in there, get a shot, get in.

00:12:02 How are you coping with your father's death?

00:12:04 - If you're just joining us,

00:12:08 James Reed has been found dead

00:12:10 from an allergic reaction to a bee sting,

00:12:12 leaving his son his media empire.

00:12:14 (gentle music)

00:12:17 ♪ Early one morning ♪

00:12:24 ♪ With time to kill ♪

00:12:26 ♪ I borrowed Jeb's rifle ♪

00:12:29 ♪ And sat on the hill ♪

00:12:31 ♪ I saw a lone rider ♪

00:12:34 ♪ Crossing the plain ♪

00:12:36 ♪ I drew a bead on him ♪

00:12:39 ♪ To practice my aim ♪

00:12:41 ♪ I hung my head ♪

00:12:42 - It was during my election campaign

00:12:43 for district attorney that I first met James Reed,

00:12:46 and it was immediately clear to me

00:12:48 that he was a man of infallible integrity.

00:12:51 He dedicated himself to this city

00:12:54 through his philanthropic endeavors

00:12:55 and his newspaper, the Daily Sentinel,

00:12:58 a shining beacon of truth.

00:13:00 He was our North Star.

00:13:02 He showed us the way.

00:13:04 Thank you, James.

00:13:12 (audience applauding)

00:13:15 - Brett, your father was truly a great man.

00:13:25 When I first started campaigning--

00:13:26 - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:13:27 - He was the best businessman I've ever known.

00:13:29 He always came out on top.

00:13:31 - Brett?

00:13:33 Brett, hey.

00:13:37 I'm so sorry for your loss.

00:13:40 I just wanna say that my father was a federal court judge,

00:13:43 so I think I kinda know how it feels.

00:13:46 When he passed away, I had some pretty big shoes to fill,

00:13:50 just like you.

00:13:50 So if you ever need somebody to talk to,

00:13:55 I mean, if you ever just wanna grab a drink,

00:13:57 wanna get cheered up, I'm around.

00:14:01 - Okay, thanks, man.

00:14:03 I really appreciate it.

00:14:04 - Lock it up.

00:14:05 - Yeah, okay.

00:14:06 - Keep it tight.

00:14:07 - Cool.

00:14:09 (dramatic music)

00:14:11 - This is your newspaper.

00:14:22 But the burden doesn't have to fall on you alone.

00:14:26 I've been your father's most trusted colleague

00:14:35 for the past 45 years.

00:14:38 I wanna make sure that the Daily Sentinel

00:14:40 stays on the path that would make him proud.

00:14:42 So what do you think of all this?

00:14:51 - I don't think anything, man.

00:14:55 I don't know a thing about this newspaper.

00:14:58 I've never even read a full edition of it.

00:15:01 - You can do whatever the hell you want with it.

00:15:05 I'm not the guy to run the Sentinel.

00:15:07 - Trying doesn't matter when you always fail.

00:15:21 - Oh, where's my leaf?

00:15:33 Leaf.

00:15:34 (grunts)

00:15:38 (dramatic music)

00:15:41 - Hello?

00:15:52 Who makes my coffee?

00:15:54 Who makes my coffee?

00:15:55 Will someone explain to me why the worst day of my life

00:15:59 my coffee tastes like shit?

00:16:02 - Your coffee is normally made by Kato.

00:16:04 - Who the hell is that?

00:16:06 - He works on your father's cars and makes his coffee.

00:16:09 You fired him and everyone else

00:16:10 who works for your father yesterday.

00:16:12 - I want Kato here now!

00:16:13 (engine rumbling)

00:16:17 You're Kato.

00:16:31 - Man, I thought your name was Henry.

00:16:33 I thought the pool guy was Kato.

00:16:34 - I'm Kato.

00:16:35 I'm sorry to hear about your father.

00:16:40 Was a complex man.

00:16:42 - Yeah.

00:16:46 I have two questions for you, Kato,

00:16:49 and then you can go home.

00:16:51 Why is it that my dad's mechanic makes the coffee?

00:16:53 And why is it that without you, the coffee tastes like crap?

00:16:57 - I think it's easier if I show you.

00:17:00 (engine rumbling)

00:17:02 - Holy cow, where did you get that thing?

00:17:05 - I made it.

00:17:07 Watch this.

00:17:07 (upbeat music)

00:17:10 (engine rumbling)

00:17:15 (tires screeching)

00:17:25 (upbeat music)

00:17:27 - Sit with me, Kato.

00:17:52 Tell me your tale.

00:17:54 - I was born in Shanghai.

00:17:56 You know Shanghai?

00:17:57 - Love Japan.

00:17:58 - My parents died when I was four.

00:18:00 And until I was 12, I lived in an orphanage.

00:18:05 - Sorry, my mom died when I was young too.

00:18:09 What happened after that?

00:18:12 - Me and a few friends ran away.

00:18:14 And lived on the street.

00:18:16 - How'd you start working for my dad?

00:18:17 Tell me that.

00:18:18 - I work in a garage.

00:18:19 - Okay.

00:18:20 - And one day, your father came in with a '65 Chrysler.

00:18:23 - I know the car well.

00:18:24 - He was so happy with my work.

00:18:26 Then he offered me a job.

00:18:29 I said yes.

00:18:30 - The coffee, how'd that come about?

00:18:32 - He used to always say,

00:18:34 no one could ever make me a good cup of coffee.

00:18:37 - Good impression.

00:18:39 - So I built him a coffee machine.

00:18:40 - Well, you make one damn fine cup of coffee, sir.

00:18:45 - Wanna see something cool?

00:18:46 - Yeah.

00:18:49 (shouting)

00:18:52 - Not bad, man.

00:18:54 You did that?

00:18:55 - Yep, industrial potty company.

00:18:57 - What the hell is industrial potty?

00:19:00 - It's the stuff they use to make shock tanks.

00:19:06 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing, man?

00:19:08 Put that thing away, are you crazy?

00:19:09 - Come on, don't be a pussy.

00:19:11 - What are you gonna do?

00:19:17 (gun firing)

00:19:21 - Whoa, dude.

00:19:22 That was awesome, what is that stuff?

00:19:26 How does that, whoa, what are you gonna do now?

00:19:28 - And.

00:19:29 - Whoa!

00:19:32 That is some Ben Hur shit, dude.

00:19:35 - Yep, your dad made me do this kind of stuff

00:19:38 over the last few years.

00:19:39 (whistling)

00:19:42 - That is the balls.

00:19:47 - Old man was getting paranoid, huh?

00:19:50 - You like that?

00:19:51 - Yeah.

00:19:52 - Check this out.

00:19:52 - Wow.

00:19:57 You drew all these?

00:20:03 This is awesome.

00:20:04 Kato, you are a really good drawer.

00:20:07 This is really impressive.

00:20:09 - Thanks, that's the stuff I would really like to do.

00:20:11 - Holy, Kato, are you a pervert?

00:20:16 - Wish I could draw stuff that's that sexy.

00:20:18 - Beer?

00:20:22 - Yeah, I'd love a beer, sure.

00:20:24 (glass shattering)

00:20:30 - Thank you.

00:20:38 (glass shattering)

00:20:41 - Hey, Kato.

00:20:47 What did you think of my father?

00:20:51 - He was fine.

00:20:52 - Come on, just tell me.

00:20:55 - He was my boss.

00:20:57 Nobody loves their boss.

00:20:59 - Don't sugarcoat this, Kato.

00:21:00 You're not gonna offend me.

00:21:02 Just tell me, man to man.

00:21:04 - He was a bit of a dick.

00:21:07 (dramatic music)

00:21:09 - Yep.

00:21:11 (glass shattering)

00:21:15 You are, look at that.

00:21:18 - I'm genius.

00:21:20 - You are a genius.

00:21:22 You're a mad genius.

00:21:24 - I like classical music.

00:21:25 - You're a genius who likes classical music.

00:21:28 You know what you are?

00:21:29 You're a human Swiss army knife.

00:21:31 - I don't know what's that mean.

00:21:32 - It's a little thing and you keep pulling out things

00:21:34 and just when you think there couldn't be

00:21:36 any more cool things, a new cool thing comes out

00:21:38 and that's you.

00:21:39 You even are dressed like one.

00:21:40 You just need a little plus on your chest.

00:21:42 Let's drink more.

00:21:43 - Yeah, let's drink.

00:21:45 - Kanbei.

00:21:46 - Kanbei, yeah.

00:21:48 (speaking in foreign language)

00:21:49 - You're speaking Chinese right now.

00:21:51 - Oh shit, sorry.

00:21:53 I spent three weeks making a new bumper

00:21:55 for his Rolls Royce.

00:21:57 - Yeah.

00:21:58 - And the day after I finished, he crashed it.

00:22:00 He actually said it was my fault.

00:22:03 He screamed at me.

00:22:06 That sounds like him.

00:22:07 Listen to this, here's another story

00:22:09 of the 10 million I have.

00:22:10 I'm young.

00:22:12 There's a, guys are picking on a girl in school.

00:22:16 I try to stop it.

00:22:17 I get in trouble.

00:22:18 What does my dad do?

00:22:19 He takes my favorite coin and he rips the head off of it

00:22:22 right in front of me and he throws it in the garbage.

00:22:25 I was trying to help.

00:22:26 That's all I was trying to do.

00:22:27 You know, it's unbelievable.

00:22:30 He, he's an ass his entire life

00:22:33 and you know, they, they build him a statue.

00:22:36 I just don't think people are gonna look at it

00:22:38 and think he's great, but he's not.

00:22:41 It's, it's, it's totally unfair.

00:22:44 - There's no justice.

00:22:46 - Volcano.

00:22:51 You say we get ourselves some goddamn justice, huh?

00:22:55 - You serious?

00:22:57 - Totally serious.

00:22:58 Let's do something crazy, man.

00:22:59 Let's just do something nuts.

00:23:01 Let's just do it.

00:23:03 - Yeah.

00:23:03 - Let's roll, Kato.

00:23:14 (rock music)

00:23:17 - You think it makes me happy to do this, Dad?

00:23:32 (rock music)

00:23:34 - Come here.

00:23:45 Oh, this looks ominous.

00:23:57 (rock music)

00:24:00 - Oh shit.

00:24:13 Oh no.

00:24:13 What do I do?

00:24:20 What do I do?

00:24:21 Oh God.

00:24:22 Hey, leave him alone.

00:24:26 - Let's get him.

00:24:28 - Oh shit.

00:24:29 I made a mistake.

00:24:30 (rock music)

00:24:33 - Hey, seriously, let's just stop.

00:24:41 Seriously.

00:24:41 (rock music)

00:24:44 - I'm gonna give him a root canal.

00:24:51 - I don't want one.

00:24:52 - Let's cut him.

00:24:56 - Open wide.

00:24:57 - You're a dead man.

00:25:01 Come on, let's go.

00:25:02 (rock music)

00:25:05 (metal clanging)

00:25:08 (metal clanging)

00:25:10 (rock music)

00:25:13 (metal clanging)

00:25:16 (rock music)

00:25:18 - Rick, behind you.

00:25:45 (metal clanging)

00:25:48 - Eat shit.

00:25:52 - Get him up.

00:25:58 Wait, wait for me, wait.

00:26:04 - Go, go, go, go.

00:26:08 - I'm in, I'm in.

00:26:09 (tires screeching)

00:26:11 - We got him.

00:26:12 That was crazy.

00:26:13 I can't believe this.

00:26:14 - Holy shit.

00:26:16 Oh my God, Kato.

00:26:17 (tires screeching)

00:26:20 - Shit, Vicks.

00:26:27 - Oh no, oh no.

00:26:28 - Are you a good driver?

00:26:31 - You kidding me?

00:26:32 I know as a kid, me and some friends--

00:26:34 - Kato, not now, just drive.

00:26:35 - Okay, okay.

00:26:36 (tires screeching)

00:26:39 - Just stay cool.

00:26:42 - What do I do?

00:26:43 - Just stay casual.

00:26:45 - Pull it over, now.

00:26:46 - What you doing?

00:26:49 - I'm trying to lose him, I don't know.

00:26:51 Oh man, now we're in a car chase.

00:26:54 Here he comes.

00:26:55 - Show me your hands.

00:27:01 - He's trying to kill us.

00:27:10 Do the Ben Hur shit.

00:27:13 The Ben Hur shit.

00:27:14 Oh no.

00:27:27 - Oh, damn it.

00:27:36 - Kato, I think this is the greatest moment

00:27:42 of my entire life.

00:27:44 - I know, mine too.

00:27:45 (upbeat music)

00:27:51 - Oh yeah, we roll.

00:27:52 - Yeah.

00:27:55 - Hi-ya, that was amazing.

00:27:57 Hi-ya, wah.

00:27:58 Hi-ya, hi-ya.

00:28:01 We awesome.

00:28:06 That was crazy.

00:28:08 How did you do that, dude?

00:28:10 - I beat the crap out of those guys.

00:28:12 - Where I grew up, it was very dangerous.

00:28:14 I got in a lot of fights when I was a kid.

00:28:17 - But that was like you knew where people were

00:28:19 without even looking, it was so fast.

00:28:21 - When my heart starts pumping,

00:28:22 it's almost like time slows down.

00:28:25 - It's unbelievable how cool we are.

00:28:27 Do you hear me, dad?

00:28:29 We did it.

00:28:30 - That was amazing.

00:28:32 - Kato, I'm serious.

00:28:33 I'm gonna get real with you, so just go with this.

00:28:38 Might get weird and intimate, but just accept me, okay?

00:28:43 What we did tonight was fantastic.

00:28:46 It was amazing.

00:28:47 We saved those people, man.

00:28:50 We saved their lives.

00:28:51 So here's what I'm saying.

00:28:53 We keep doing this.

00:28:54 You can beat the crap out of a million dudes at once

00:28:57 'cause you can like freeze time or something

00:28:58 when your heart starts pumping.

00:28:59 We do that every night, I'm saying.

00:29:02 Kato, Kato.

00:29:06 ♪ We could be heroes ♪

00:29:09 - Hey, hey, hey, look, look.

00:29:11 - Oh, we're on television.

00:29:13 - We're on TV.

00:29:16 - Look at me.

00:29:20 - Where am I?

00:29:21 - I don't know.

00:29:22 - I'm too fast for TV.

00:29:26 - Yes, exactly.

00:29:27 - We saved those people

00:29:31 and they just talk about their stupid head.

00:29:33 How can we be heroes if they think we're criminals?

00:29:36 - Are considered armed and dangerous.

00:29:39 I am coming to you live from Elysian Hill.

00:29:42 - Okay.

00:29:45 Think about this, Kato.

00:29:48 What is the one insanely stupid thing

00:29:51 every superhero has in common?

00:29:52 - Tights?

00:29:55 - No.

00:29:56 - Cape?

00:29:57 - No, Kato.

00:29:58 It's that everyone knows that they're the good guy,

00:30:02 the hero, you know?

00:30:03 All the bad guy has to do

00:30:05 is start capping some innocent people

00:30:07 and he's got the good guy by the nuts.

00:30:08 He's gotta do whatever he says.

00:30:09 It's in every movie, it's in every comic book.

00:30:12 It's in everything.

00:30:12 It's so stupid.

00:30:14 But if the bad guy thought the good guy was also a bad guy,

00:30:18 he wouldn't be able to do that.

00:30:19 That's what we'll do differently.

00:30:21 We will pose as villains, but we'll act like heroes.

00:30:25 - But then the police and the bad guys

00:30:28 will both try to kill us.

00:30:30 - We're dead already, Kato.

00:30:32 I mean, seriously, look at us.

00:30:35 We've both been completely wasting our potential.

00:30:38 You a little bit more than me.

00:30:40 I mean, what do you want your autobiography to be called?

00:30:42 Oil changes and cappuccinos?

00:30:45 Because I think "Balls Deep in Shit-Kicking Dudes"

00:30:50 by Kato is a much cooler sounding book.

00:30:53 I would read that book and I don't read shit,

00:30:55 but when they adapted it into a movie,

00:30:57 I would see the shit out of it.

00:30:59 Kato, you should never make coffee for anyone again.

00:31:02 It's a waste of your talents.

00:31:04 It's not dying that you need to be afraid of.

00:31:06 It's never having lived in the first place.

00:31:09 - It did feel good, saving those people.

00:31:16 - Well, technically I saved them,

00:31:17 but you helped, I guess, yeah.

00:31:18 - Whatever.

00:31:19 - Whatever, let's not get technical.

00:31:20 - But why would people take it serious?

00:31:22 We're just two guys, who's still ahead?

00:31:28 - Hmm?

00:31:29 - I know how to make them take us seriously.

00:31:33 (upbeat music)

00:31:36 - All right, gentlemen, hear ye, hear ye.

00:31:43 Court is in session.

00:31:44 Let's talk shop, okay?

00:31:46 Shall we?

00:31:47 Who's this guy?

00:31:50 Who's your friend?

00:31:52 - He's my man.

00:31:53 - I'm not your man.

00:31:55 - He's not my man.

00:31:56 - No, he's not my man.

00:31:58 He's like, you know, he's like my man.

00:32:00 He's my, we're just platonic friends.

00:32:04 We're platonic male friends.

00:32:06 He's my executive associate.

00:32:08 Yes, that's who he is, and that doesn't matter.

00:32:12 What does matter is how we tackle this horrible incident.

00:32:17 It's clear to me that whoever did this means business,

00:32:19 and this is just the beginning.

00:32:21 - Talking about business,

00:32:22 you mean this vandalizing business, ah, I get it.

00:32:25 Listen, let's not blow this thing out of proportion.

00:32:28 - I will blow this guy in any proportion I like.

00:32:31 This is my newspaper, Axford,

00:32:33 and I want this man on the front page of it.

00:32:35 I want him on the webpage.

00:32:37 I want you to blog about it.

00:32:39 I want him on every news outlet we have.

00:32:41 I want the whole city to know how dangerous this man is.

00:32:45 The man that cut the head off of my father's statue,

00:32:49 not yours.

00:32:50 - All right.

00:32:53 Since there isn't any real info on the guy's identity,

00:32:57 what do we call him?

00:32:59 - That's easy.

00:33:11 I got it.

00:33:13 This man is called the Green Bee.

00:33:19 Hmm.

00:33:23 - Kind of lame.

00:33:24 - Nah, it sounds like a knitting store or something.

00:33:25 - No, it sounds like an energy bar.

00:33:27 - No, I, I, that came out wrong.

00:33:30 That's not what I meant.

00:33:30 - I didn't mean to have an energy bar.

00:33:32 - I think it's straight on the--

00:33:33 - Then make it like the Green Desegration.

00:33:35 - What's the guy that drives around the horse,

00:33:36 he has no hair?

00:33:37 - The Green Crunchcoat.

00:33:38 - The Green Hornet.

00:33:39 - No, it's more like--

00:33:41 - What?

00:33:42 - The Green Hornet.

00:33:43 - Well, that's pretty awesome.

00:33:47 - Much better.

00:33:48 - You guys like that?

00:33:48 - Yeah.

00:33:49 - I like that.

00:33:50 - I like that.

00:33:51 - Much better.

00:33:52 - You guys like that?

00:33:53 - Yeah.

00:33:53 - Yeah, your man's right.

00:33:54 - The Green Hornet it is.

00:33:56 - The Green Hornet.

00:33:56 - Okay, okay, fine, fine.

00:33:59 It's decided then.

00:34:00 - Yeah.

00:34:01 - The front page of tomorrow's newspaper

00:34:02 will feature the Green Hornet.

00:34:05 Unless you like Green Bee better, anyone?

00:34:06 - No.

00:34:07 - Oh, that's much worse.

00:34:08 - Definitely Hornet.

00:34:10 - Okay, let's roll, Kato.

00:34:11 (upbeat music)

00:34:14 - This could be a long night.

00:34:19 (upbeat music)

00:34:21 - Ah, yeah.

00:34:35 We need to think of a cool name for you.

00:34:42 The Little Stinger.

00:34:43 I'm the Green Hornet.

00:34:44 You're my Little Stinger.

00:34:45 - No way.

00:34:46 - The Honey Pot, get it?

00:34:49 Like bees make honey, you're my Honey Pot.

00:34:51 (thunder rumbling)

00:34:53 - What's going on?

00:34:54 - Decapitated statues.

00:35:00 I decapitated real people.

00:35:02 - I wouldn't worry about it.

00:35:04 We're not a fat business.

00:35:06 - I'm not worried.

00:35:08 Who told you I'm worried?

00:35:12 - GA Scanlon.

00:35:13 - GA Scanlon, with the nightclub bombing last week

00:35:15 and now this Green Hornet guy,

00:35:16 some are saying that the streets might not be as safe

00:35:18 as you're making them out to be.

00:35:19 - Look, guys, guys, stop.

00:35:21 Stop connecting separate dots with invisible lines.

00:35:23 This Green Hornet thing is just a prank.

00:35:26 Now what you guys should be reporting on

00:35:28 is that since I took office,

00:35:29 crime has downed significantly in the city of Los Angeles.

00:35:32 Thank you.

00:35:33 (bell dinging)

00:35:34 (upbeat music)

00:35:36 (people chattering)

00:35:39 - Hi. - Hi.

00:36:03 I'm Lenore Case.

00:36:06 I'm the temp for Mr. Reed's secretarial position.

00:36:09 Today's my first day.

00:36:11 - Oh, nice to meet you.

00:36:13 I'm Kato.

00:36:14 It's my first day too.

00:36:15 - Really?

00:36:16 Well, nice to meet you.

00:36:18 Do you work for Mr. Reed?

00:36:20 - I'm his executive associate.

00:36:22 - Wow, that must be great.

00:36:24 - Yeah, it is, so far.

00:36:26 - Kato, I have a really important question for you.

00:36:30 Who is the hottie boom body

00:36:32 who's standing right behind me right now?

00:36:34 I'm kidding.

00:36:35 I'm Britt Reed, I own this newspaper.

00:36:37 What's going on?

00:36:38 - Such a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Reed.

00:36:38 - Oh, thanks. - I'm Lenore Case.

00:36:40 I've been sent to you to be your temp

00:36:41 until you find a new secretary.

00:36:43 - Ah, jackpot.

00:36:47 Right this way.

00:36:49 So, got one.

00:36:52 Why don't you tell me,

00:36:53 how do you feel about the state of this newspaper

00:36:58 as it stands today, you?

00:37:01 - To be honest,

00:37:03 this paper has taken a dip in the last few years

00:37:06 in quality and ambition.

00:37:07 - Really?

00:37:08 - Well, of course, the entire industry has taken a hit

00:37:11 because of the internet,

00:37:12 so there's a lot of pressure to print

00:37:14 easy to digest articles,

00:37:16 and it is the last family-owned paper in the city,

00:37:18 and one of the only ones not attached to a conglomerate

00:37:20 in the entire country, so it's understandable.

00:37:22 - Conglomerate?

00:37:23 - But the Sentinel used to really use its independence

00:37:26 to be brazen at the very least,

00:37:28 like that article that your father wrote

00:37:29 just after the nightclub bombing,

00:37:30 that was real reporting.

00:37:32 That is a kind of article that can really make a difference.

00:37:35 - Wow, that was good.

00:37:37 You know a lot about this shit, huh?

00:37:39 - I studied journalism.

00:37:40 I have a minor in criminology.

00:37:42 - Really?

00:37:43 - Yeah.

00:37:44 - Criminology, study of the criminal mind.

00:37:47 What are your thoughts on this Green Hornet character, you?

00:37:50 - Well, first off, there's two kinds of criminals.

00:37:54 - Okay.

00:37:55 - There's the psycho-ego maniac and the power maniac.

00:37:57 He seems to be the second,

00:37:59 because he defies authority and without--

00:38:01 - What do you think he'll do next?

00:38:03 - Yeah, that's it.

00:38:04 What is his next move, is what I was gonna ask.

00:38:07 - Well, he'll probably try to appropriate more power.

00:38:12 You know, he'll hit somebody on their own turf.

00:38:14 Basically, he'll start out small,

00:38:16 and then he'll work his way up to the top.

00:38:18 I mean, that's what John Gotti did to Paul Castellano in '85.

00:38:21 - And it worked?

00:38:22 - Yes.

00:38:23 - Wow, look at you.

00:38:25 You really know a lot about this stuff,

00:38:28 and you're lovely and beautiful,

00:38:29 and I'm just sitting here thinking,

00:38:31 why are you only pursuing this in your,

00:38:33 okay, help me out here,

00:38:36 Twilight?

00:38:38 - Twilight?

00:38:42 - Yeah.

00:38:43 - I saw the movie, but I don't see how this is--

00:38:46 - Oh, no, no, no, no, no, not like the movie.

00:38:49 I guess if we're doing movies,

00:38:50 it would be more like "Cocoon" or something like that.

00:38:55 Later in one's years.

00:38:58 - Wait, I'm only 36.

00:39:00 - 36?

00:39:01 Holy shit, that's crazy.

00:39:03 I thought you were like 31, tops.

00:39:05 I don't even know if we can hire a 36-year-old.

00:39:07 We have to build a ramp, huh?

00:39:09 Why, why now?

00:39:10 - She doesn't wanna tell you.

00:39:12 - I don't think you know what you're talking about, Kato,

00:39:13 so keep it quiet. - No, Mr. Kato is right.

00:39:15 I do not feel comfortable discussing this,

00:39:17 and if this means that I am not going to be your temp

00:39:19 any longer, then I'm sorry, it's--

00:39:21 - That's exactly what it means.

00:39:23 Yeah.

00:39:25 - Okay, thank you.

00:39:26 'Cause you are now my permanent secretary.

00:39:30 Here is what has gone down, Lenore.

00:39:32 You've displayed two things.

00:39:35 Balls.

00:39:36 If there's one thing I like on my women, it's balls.

00:39:41 Please be my permanent secretary.

00:39:42 - Are you kidding me?

00:39:43 - I'm not kidding.

00:39:44 This is how I do, this is how I roll.

00:39:46 Every day, all day, I make it rain like this, okay?

00:39:49 I want you to come work for me.

00:39:51 Just say yes, just say yes.

00:39:52 - Really? - Don't think,

00:39:53 just say yes. - Okay, I'll do it, yes.

00:39:54 - Thank you, yes.

00:39:55 - Oh my God, this is so exciting.

00:39:56 - It is exciting.

00:39:57 - Mr. Cato, thank you so much.

00:39:58 - Don't thank him, he did nothing.

00:39:59 - Okay, thank you. - Yes.

00:40:00 - I promise I will not disappoint you.

00:40:02 - I don't think you will. - I will do

00:40:03 in-depth research. - Good.

00:40:04 - I will do fact checking. - Good.

00:40:05 - Spell checking, anything you need.

00:40:06 - Perfect, well, why don't you get started?

00:40:08 A more Green Hornet research, actually, that's perfect.

00:40:11 Bam, she is hot.

00:40:13 It's crazy how hot she is, it's sickening.

00:40:15 - Did you write down everything she said?

00:40:16 - Nothing, let me see.

00:40:17 Pervert.

00:40:20 Let's get to work, Cato.

00:40:22 All right, we got a plan.

00:40:25 Start small, work our way up to the top.

00:40:27 - Okay.

00:40:28 We'll need a car.

00:40:30 - Hells yes, we'll need a car.

00:40:32 - With our own weapons.

00:40:33 - Hmm.

00:40:34 - And armor.

00:40:35 - Cool rims, spinning rims.

00:40:37 - Slurpee machine.

00:40:38 - A horn that plays La Cucaracha.

00:40:39 - It'll be loaded up the ass with cool shit.

00:40:41 - I can do that.

00:40:42 - Cato, I want you to take my hand

00:40:45 and I want you to come with me on this adventure.

00:40:47 - I'll go with you, but I don't wanna touch you.

00:40:50 - Okay, you don't have to take my hand,

00:40:51 but will you come with me on this adventure?

00:40:53 (upbeat music)

00:40:56 - Come on, man.

00:41:02 ♪ Something better than nothing is giving up ♪

00:41:09 ♪ You're needed for something ♪

00:41:13 ♪ Try to keep the truth from showing up ♪

00:41:16 ♪ How dare you ♪

00:41:19 ♪ How are you not anyway ♪

00:41:22 ♪ How dare you ♪

00:41:25 ♪ How are you not anyway ♪

00:41:29 - See what's going down, girl.

00:41:35 ♪ How dare you ♪

00:41:38 ♪ How are you not anyway ♪

00:41:40 - Hey, Cato, come closer.

00:41:42 I had an idea for the car.

00:41:45 Ejector seats.

00:41:46 - Ejector seats?

00:41:48 - You don't think it's a good idea?

00:41:49 (upbeat music)

00:41:52 (gunshots)

00:41:56 ♪ You've got a reaction ♪

00:42:02 ♪ You've got a reaction ♪

00:42:06 ♪ You took a lot of hits ♪

00:42:09 ♪ You took a lot of hits and turned it blue ♪

00:42:12 ♪ Something better than nothing ♪

00:42:15 ♪ Something better than nothing is giving up ♪

00:42:18 ♪ You're needed for something ♪

00:42:22 ♪ You've got a reaction ♪

00:42:23 ♪ How dare you ♪

00:42:25 ♪ You took a lot of hits ♪

00:42:28 ♪ You took a lot of hits and turned it blue ♪

00:42:31 - I'm so excited right now.

00:42:34 I can't wait.

00:42:35 Man, what the hell?

00:42:41 - Watch your feet.

00:42:43 I call you the Black Beauty.

00:42:46 - Damn.

00:42:49 It's beautiful.

00:42:50 And it's black.

00:42:53 Wow.

00:42:54 Incredible.

00:42:56 - Oh, dude, we're forgetting something very important.

00:43:08 - What's this?

00:43:09 - That is so wicked.

00:43:16 (upbeat music)

00:43:18 ♪ As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death ♪

00:43:23 ♪ I take a look at my life and realize there's much death ♪

00:43:26 ♪ 'Cause I've been laughing and laughing so long ♪

00:43:29 ♪ That even my mama thinks that my mind is gone ♪

00:43:31 ♪ Tell me why are we so blind to see ♪

00:43:36 ♪ That the ones we hurt are you and me ♪

00:43:45 ♪ I've been staying most of my life ♪

00:43:49 - Where are we going?

00:43:50 - I have no idea.

00:43:51 I thought you knew.

00:43:52 - Oh, okay.

00:43:53 I got an idea.

00:43:54 Okay.

00:43:55 (phone ringing)

00:43:58 - Mr. Reed's office.

00:43:59 - I'm looking at you.

00:44:01 - What?

00:44:02 - I'm totally joking.

00:44:03 Britt Reed calling.

00:44:05 Burning the candle at both ends, I see.

00:44:08 Wouldn't Mr. Case be upset with that?

00:44:11 There is no Mr. Case.

00:44:14 - Well, that's not why I'm calling.

00:44:16 I'm actually calling 'cause Mary,

00:44:18 we asked you to do all that Green Hornet research,

00:44:20 you know, predicting what he might do next.

00:44:21 If you could just send us that, those crime maps.

00:44:24 - Oh, yeah.

00:44:25 - That'd be really helpful.

00:44:26 Just fax it on over.

00:44:26 - Yes, hold on a second.

00:44:27 Let me see.

00:44:28 And it's coming right at you.

00:44:30 Great.

00:44:31 - So what you doing?

00:44:32 - If you need anything else, you can just let me know.

00:44:34 - Perfect, that's all I can say.

00:44:35 - Thank you.

00:44:36 Bye-bye.

00:44:37 - She wants me so bad, it's crazy.

00:44:40 - Mm-hmm.

00:44:41 (dramatic music)

00:44:44 - There we go.

00:44:46 - South Central.

00:44:47 - Yeah, okay.

00:44:48 We got 14 homicides, 34 assaults, 116 drug arrests.

00:44:53 This month.

00:44:55 - Sounds like a good place for the Green Hornet

00:44:56 to make his debut.

00:44:57 - Let's roll, Kato.

00:44:59 - Let's roll.

00:45:00 - Really far east.

00:45:06 Never been to this part of town.

00:45:10 - I think we're in the hood, Kato.

00:45:12 - Wait, wait.

00:45:14 - You think we start with them?

00:45:17 - Yeah, just like Lenore said.

00:45:19 Start small, work our way up.

00:45:21 This is really, really intense.

00:45:23 - So you don't wanna do it?

00:45:24 - I do, I do.

00:45:24 We should just, let's just do a pass

00:45:25 before we chicken out, okay?

00:45:26 - I'm not gonna chicken out.

00:45:27 - Who knows you might chicken out?

00:45:28 I don't know.

00:45:29 Just pull up to them.

00:45:30 - I don't wanna talk.

00:45:31 - Well, I don't wanna talk either.

00:45:32 They're on your side of the wind.

00:45:33 - It's okay, I'm not mad.

00:45:33 - I'll be yelling over you.

00:45:34 - I barely speak English.

00:45:36 - You speak English right now.

00:45:37 Okay, fine.

00:45:38 - This is so stupid.

00:45:39 - Okay, calm down.

00:45:42 - I am calm.

00:45:42 - Just shut up, this is scary.

00:45:43 - Shut up. - You shut up.

00:45:44 - Just shut up.

00:45:45 - Let me talk. - Be cool, be cool.

00:45:46 - I am cool. - Shut up.

00:45:48 - Yo, you looking for that good stuff, man?

00:45:52 - Hola, I am the Green Hornet,

00:45:55 and I would like to sit down with your boss.

00:45:57 - Sit on this, bitch.

00:45:58 (guns firing)

00:46:00 (man screaming)

00:46:03 (car engine roaring)

00:46:06 (man screaming)

00:46:09 (guns firing)

00:46:14 - Beanbags, Kato, get him with the beanbags.

00:46:16 - Go.

00:46:17 (guns firing)

00:46:20 - Yeah, yeah.

00:46:22 Let me show you how it's done, Kato.

00:46:27 Green Hornet, sit, hello.

00:46:29 (man screaming)

00:46:34 (guns firing)

00:46:37 (guns firing)

00:46:39 - Eight, five, four, bitch.

00:46:55 - I'm nuts.

00:47:03 (man screaming)

00:47:06 - What the hell was that?

00:47:08 Who do you work for?

00:47:11 Oh, God, Bruce.

00:47:13 Who do you work for?

00:47:18 Shit.

00:47:18 Hey, you, come here, come here.

00:47:21 Hey, who do you work for?

00:47:23 - Chernovsky, same guy everybody works for.

00:47:25 - Chavusky?

00:47:26 - Chernovsky.

00:47:28 - What kind of a dumb name is that?

00:47:29 - Chernovsky.

00:47:30 - Where do you get the shit yourself for him, huh?

00:47:31 - I can't tell you that.

00:47:33 Oh, really, never.

00:47:34 - Chernovsky's on our ass, guys.

00:47:38 We gotta get this shipment done tonight.

00:47:42 (guns firing)

00:47:44 - You've just been stung.

00:47:50 Yeah.

00:47:52 You, this is my town now.

00:47:54 My name is the Green Hornet.

00:47:58 - Cool, man, nice to meet you.

00:48:00 - Cool, how's it going?

00:48:02 Anyway, tell your boss, the Green Hornet sends his regards.

00:48:06 - Dude.

00:48:08 You broke my lap, man.

00:48:13 - Yeah, I'm sorry about that.

00:48:15 Let's burn this mother down, kid.

00:48:21 (engine revving)

00:48:24 (tires screeching)

00:48:27 - Explain yourself, Mr. Topper.

00:48:40 - The guy was crazy, man.

00:48:42 I mean, he drove a car through a wall.

00:48:45 The thing looked like a half tank or something.

00:48:46 I mean, there was fire coming out of the thing.

00:48:49 - And?

00:48:51 - Oh yeah, he gave me this.

00:48:53 He said that this is his town now.

00:48:57 - A man comes in in an insect costume

00:49:01 and you shit your pants?

00:49:02 - Look, trust me.

00:49:04 A grown man wearing a mask is a little bit scarier

00:49:08 than a guy wearing a suit.

00:49:10 - You're not pleased with my suit?

00:49:18 - Does it fail to fill you with fear?

00:49:21 - Sorry, I didn't mean any disrespect.

00:49:26 - Do you have any idea how many great people

00:49:28 have killed in our suit?

00:49:30 (gun firing)

00:49:32 - I like you, Satan.

00:49:33 - Me too.

00:49:34 - Now this is exactly what I was talking about.

00:49:37 - I'm not as scary as some idiot in a green mask.

00:49:40 Come on.

00:49:40 - You said it won't affect business.

00:49:44 Now this guy ran six of the biggest meth labs in LA.

00:49:47 Now because of that hornet, he's dead.

00:49:50 Business affected.

00:49:52 - Well, I've got three reports of the Green Hornet

00:49:54 shooting out a red light camera at some stoplight.

00:49:56 - I have reports that an elderly couple claims

00:49:57 the Green Hornet gave him the finger from the HOV.

00:50:00 - The Green Hornet and a chauffeur in a fist fight

00:50:03 with gang members in South Central.

00:50:05 - The Green Hornet raises a lot of questions.

00:50:07 We all know that gang proliferation

00:50:09 has been rising in the last few years.

00:50:10 - Okay, that'll be homework.

00:50:11 I'm sorry, I gotta get yoga class.

00:50:14 Don't worry.

00:50:15 - Number two, bottom line, headlines, people.

00:50:18 Get this story out there.

00:50:20 Will the violence continue to spill out onto the street?

00:50:24 What are the police doing about it?

00:50:26 Is anyone safe at the mercy of Dot, Dot, Dot?

00:50:31 The Green Hornet, and I want those dots.

00:50:33 I want dots in the paper, okay?

00:50:34 - Mr. Reed, do you want us to handle this

00:50:36 kind of, you know, delicately?

00:50:37 - No.

00:50:38 - But DA Scanlon's entire re-election platform

00:50:40 is based on him cleaning up the streets.

00:50:42 We know that you guys are acquaintances,

00:50:44 so if you want us to sort of--

00:50:45 - Oh, actually, that's a great idea.

00:50:46 You should use that.

00:50:48 Write an article about that.

00:50:49 Even DA Scanlon is quivering at the feet of this scourge.

00:50:53 Use the word scourge.

00:50:54 Write an article about that.

00:50:56 - Britt, can I talk to you for a second?

00:50:57 - Yeah.

00:50:58 - Look, I know what you're trying to do here,

00:51:00 turn this newspaper into some kind of a disc attack game.

00:51:02 It's not gonna work.

00:51:04 - That's not what I'm doing.

00:51:05 She's a brainy broad, dude.

00:51:06 - This is a serious matter.

00:51:08 For every line that we print, there's repercussions.

00:51:10 Somebody has to take responsibility.

00:51:12 That's me.

00:51:12 - Well, I'm not afraid of these bastards,

00:51:14 and you shouldn't be either.

00:51:15 - Well, either was Daniel.

00:51:18 He made it to the wall.

00:51:19 They killed him for wantonly speculating on the drug war.

00:51:22 That's exactly what you and your little girlfriend are doing.

00:51:26 I know that you think my experience ain't worth a shit,

00:51:28 but your father used to listen to me.

00:51:30 So should you.

00:51:31 - This is the story I wanna run.

00:51:33 I'm going with it.

00:51:34 And if he were fortunate enough to still be with us,

00:51:36 it's whipped.

00:51:37 - Daniel Vertilat?

00:51:41 Vertilat, Vertilib, Vertilat.

00:51:43 - It's what he would've wanted to, okay?

00:51:46 - That's the story, team.

00:51:48 Run it.

00:51:48 Brit Reid outro.

00:51:51 (rock music)

00:51:54 ♪ All right ♪

00:52:02 ♪ We're getting funny in the back of my car ♪

00:52:10 ♪ I'm sorry honey if I took you just a little too far ♪

00:52:14 - Hey, hey, hey, I'm this corner guy.

00:52:16 ♪ Too, too far ♪

00:52:19 ♪ So I, I told the fellas out there in the bar ♪

00:52:24 ♪ Told them, "Hey honey, turn down right here and while" ♪

00:52:29 ♪ I guess you are ♪

00:52:33 ♪ See I'm begging you please ♪

00:52:36 ♪ Make it all my family ♪

00:52:41 ♪ Say that you need me ♪

00:52:43 - Red light. - Stop, stop, stop, stop!

00:52:45 - Shoot, the camera got us.

00:52:47 - What camera?

00:52:53 - The Green Hornet and his mask accomplice

00:52:58 stirred up major trouble in the Southland today.

00:53:01 Violence has erupted downtown.

00:53:05 - ♪ I put all breakfast in the house ♪

00:53:08 I just checked the Hornet mail.

00:53:10 Nothing new, but they'll be a-knockin'.

00:53:13 - Sounds great. - Yeah.

00:53:15 - I have something for you.

00:53:17 - Really?

00:53:17 Awesome.

00:53:18 Dear Brit, you are my shundee.

00:53:25 What's shundee?

00:53:27 - Brother.

00:53:28 - That's awfully nice.

00:53:31 - I've never had a brother, man.

00:53:33 I always wanted one.

00:53:35 (humming)

00:53:37 Whoa!

00:53:39 What the hell is this?

00:53:41 - It's a gas gun.

00:53:43 - Your Hornet gun.

00:53:45 - A gas gun?

00:53:46 - Yeah.

00:53:46 - Why not a gun gun?

00:53:48 Our enemies have gun guns.

00:53:50 What, I don't understand.

00:53:51 What, what are these?

00:53:53 What is this?

00:53:53 What are these?

00:53:54 Are these paintballs?

00:53:55 - No, inside is knockout gas.

00:53:57 - That's insane.

00:53:59 Where's yours?

00:54:00 Do you have one?

00:54:00 Do you have a black version of it or something?

00:54:02 - No, just you.

00:54:03 - No?

00:54:05 Well, why not?

00:54:06 Why just me?

00:54:07 - You, you are so special.

00:54:09 - I know I'm special,

00:54:10 but how come I'm the only one with a gun?

00:54:12 - Because you don't have much fighting experience,

00:54:14 so I thought you needed a gun.

00:54:16 - Well, I'll be honest, that's a little insulting, man.

00:54:19 I mean, I thought we were both badasses the other night.

00:54:21 I kicked that guy in the face like three times, remember?

00:54:23 I kicked him in the face.

00:54:24 - Yeah, I remember.

00:54:26 - Yeah.

00:54:27 - It makes you look cool.

00:54:29 - I need to look cool now?

00:54:30 What the hell?

00:54:31 You said my outfit was pimp.

00:54:32 I remember even thinking,

00:54:33 that's a weird word for him to use, pimp,

00:54:34 but you said it, you said it was pimp.

00:54:35 - It is pimp.

00:54:36 - Yeah.

00:54:37 - The horny guy is just an accessory.

00:54:39 - An accessory?

00:54:40 - Yeah.

00:54:41 - Well, then you need, you need nunchucks then.

00:54:43 - If you don't like it, don't use it.

00:54:45 - No, I mean, how does it work?

00:54:47 (gunshot)

00:54:48 - Shit!

00:54:49 It works.

00:54:54 (beeping)

00:54:58 (beeping)

00:55:00 (upbeat music)

00:55:06 - Kato!

00:55:07 Kato!

00:55:07 I'm here.

00:55:08 - Hey, you're awake.

00:55:13 - What the, what happened to me?

00:55:14 What's happening?

00:55:15 What happened?

00:55:16 - You shot yourself in the face by mistake.

00:55:18 - How long was I out?

00:55:21 What time is it?

00:55:22 - Two o'clock.

00:55:23 - Oh, that's not so bad, I guess.

00:55:27 - On Thursday.

00:55:28 - It's Thursday?

00:55:29 Are you kidding?

00:55:30 It's not Monday right now?

00:55:31 - No, I'm sorry.

00:55:32 - Did you put this diaper on me?

00:55:42 Well, what did I miss?

00:55:48 - Nothing really.

00:55:49 I did some work on the back beauties.

00:55:51 - Beauties?

00:55:52 Holy crap.

00:55:56 Backups.

00:55:57 - How the hell did you do this in four days?

00:56:00 - It's been 11 days.

00:56:02 - Whoa, 11 days?

00:56:06 What?

00:56:07 Are you kidding me?

00:56:07 I wasn't sleeping, I was in a coma, dick.

00:56:10 - But it's okay now.

00:56:11 I fixed the hornet gas.

00:56:13 The gas only lasts one hour.

00:56:15 - Can I see it?

00:56:16 - Okay, but be careful this time.

00:56:18 - I'll be careful, I just wanna look at it.

00:56:19 Just give it to me for one second and I'll just--

00:56:21 (glass shattering)

00:56:26 - See you in an hour.

00:56:27 - Mr. Reed!

00:56:28 - Hey!

00:56:29 - Welcome back.

00:56:30 I'm so glad you're feeling better.

00:56:32 I heard that at Mono was the worst.

00:56:34 - Mono?

00:56:35 Yeah, well, it's better than herpes, right?

00:56:41 - Here are your messages.

00:56:41 - Thank you.

00:56:42 - I have some meetings I'd like to set up with you.

00:56:44 - Okay, cool.

00:56:45 Great, not bad at all.

00:56:46 - Here is the research that you asked for.

00:56:49 - Ooh, green hornet!

00:56:51 Me likey.

00:56:52 - DA Scanlon called.

00:56:53 He said that he really needs to speak to you--

00:56:55 - Boring!

00:56:56 - If you could possibly set--

00:56:57 - I need to go look at this stuff.

00:56:58 (door slams)

00:57:00 - What are you doing?

00:57:10 - Nothing.

00:57:11 - Nothing?

00:57:12 - Nothing at all.

00:57:12 - Thought maybe we could go get dinner

00:57:14 or get a drink, blow off some steam.

00:57:16 - Yeah!

00:57:18 I would love to.

00:57:19 (soft music)

00:57:24 - See you in a minute.

00:57:26 - Perfect, I'll be there.

00:57:30 - Okay.

00:57:31 (candy pops)

00:57:32 - Ooh!

00:57:32 (candy pops)

00:57:33 (laughs)

00:57:34 That was awesome!

00:57:36 - Hey, Kato!

00:57:37 Can you make me some coffee?

00:57:39 Now you don't have your whole little operation set up,

00:57:44 but whatever you can whip up would be great.

00:57:47 Lenore, have you had this little bastard's coffee?

00:57:51 'Cause it is scrum-diddly-umptious.

00:57:53 Only way to describe it, you want a cup?

00:57:54 - I'm fine, thank you.

00:57:55 - So that's just one cup of coffee, Kato.

00:57:58 So, there's this restaurant that just opened

00:58:01 in the San Fernando Valley,

00:58:02 and it's called La Maison de la Voie.

00:58:07 And the whole thing is you eat your meal in total darkness.

00:58:09 So with your deprived sight,

00:58:11 each bite is like an orgasm in your mouth.

00:58:14 (phone rings)

00:58:15 And I was thinking maybe it would be--

00:58:16 - Mr. Reid's office.

00:58:17 - Oh, I'm sorry.

00:58:18 This is DA Scanlon calling for Britt Reid, please.

00:58:20 - Hello, sir.

00:58:21 Yes, I'm aware you've been calling.

00:58:23 No, he's had mono.

00:58:25 Well, let me take a look.

00:58:26 Maybe there's a chance we could work that out today.

00:58:28 - Ow!

00:58:32 If you ever tell me to get you coffee again,

00:58:35 I'll beat the shit out of you.

00:58:36 - What are you, what is wrong with you?

00:58:38 Are you crazy?

00:58:39 This is not a plan.

00:58:40 You're supposed to work for me.

00:58:42 You got me a Jamba Juice.

00:58:43 We're supposed to be brothers, man.

00:58:45 We're supposed to be Shaun D.

00:58:47 What happened of that, huh?

00:58:49 - I'm sorry.

00:58:50 - Oh, you should be sorry.

00:58:52 I mean, we've become renegade superheroes

00:58:54 and there's a lot of stress involved with that,

00:58:55 but you don't gotta freak out about it, dude, okay?

00:58:59 Not gonna have the coffee or what?

00:59:00 I'm joking.

00:59:01 I'm totally joking.

00:59:02 - You still mad at me, Kato?

00:59:04 - No.

00:59:06 - Good.

00:59:06 You shouldn't be anyway.

00:59:08 What's up with Lenore, man?

00:59:10 Is she acting weird around me?

00:59:12 - No, why?

00:59:13 - I like like her.

00:59:15 And I can't nail her.

00:59:16 She's completely un-nailable.

00:59:17 It's, I mean, it's a terrible fact.

00:59:19 I don't know what to do.

00:59:20 - Maybe she doesn't like you.

00:59:21 Why would you even want her?

00:59:22 - I don't know, but I do.

00:59:23 Maybe it's because she doesn't like me.

00:59:24 Isn't that sick?

00:59:26 That could be it.

00:59:27 Girls are such a drag, Kato.

00:59:29 Thank God we have each other.

00:59:31 Hey, I'm calling a boys' night.

00:59:34 What do you say, huh?

00:59:36 What are you doing?

00:59:36 - I didn't know you wanted to hang out.

00:59:38 I'm going for drinks with a friend.

00:59:41 - Friend?

00:59:42 Who?

00:59:43 Come on.

00:59:44 - Tony.

00:59:45 (tires screeching)

00:59:46 - Tony?

00:59:46 (engine revving)

00:59:48 - Well, have fun.

00:59:50 - Hey, wait, wait, wait.

00:59:50 Can I go?

00:59:51 (engine revving)

00:59:54 You wanna try?

00:59:58 - No.

00:59:59 - Hit the back.

01:00:00 - Really?

01:00:01 - Yeah.

01:00:02 - Okay, I'll give it a try.

01:00:03 Which one?

01:00:04 (soft music)

01:00:07 You know, this green hornet thing is just crazy, isn't it?

01:00:19 I mean, it's all I can think about sometimes.

01:00:21 I feel really in tuned with it.

01:00:24 Kind of like that guy with the Zodiac killer.

01:00:26 - What about the man dressed in black?

01:00:28 - Johnny Cash?

01:00:31 - No, his partner.

01:00:33 - His partner?

01:00:34 No, I don't think that that's his partner.

01:00:36 That's probably just some thug that he hired.

01:00:38 Anyhow, they'll both be dead in no time.

01:00:41 - What?

01:00:41 - Yeah.

01:00:42 - Why?

01:00:44 - Because the green hornet's been attracting

01:00:46 way too much attention.

01:00:48 Whoever's in charge is gonna get tired of it,

01:00:50 call him in to try to make a deal with him, then kill him.

01:00:53 It's what Gotti did to Mangella in '87.

01:00:55 Two weeks, two weeks tops, that's what I give them.

01:00:58 - Two weeks?

01:00:59 - Dead.

01:01:00 - You're not gonna like this, but we got nothing.

01:01:04 It's like the green hornet didn't exist.

01:01:07 Nobody's done a deal with him,

01:01:08 nobody's done time with him,

01:01:10 nobody's ever heard of him.

01:01:11 It's like he came out of thin air.

01:01:13 - Yeah, and I've gotta say,

01:01:15 he's setting a bad example for the other gangs.

01:01:18 I met with the Armenians earlier today,

01:01:20 they told me if the hornet is independent,

01:01:23 they wanna be independent too.

01:01:25 - The Armenians truly said that?

01:01:29 - I heard rumors the Koreans are talking the same.

01:01:32 - Which Korean?

01:01:33 - Kim.

01:01:34 - Kim?

01:01:38 No, Kim never said that.

01:01:42 - We've been doing business for 25 years, we're friends.

01:01:46 - I'm sorry, boss.

01:01:47 - That's just shocking.

01:01:49 - Maybe we should go down there

01:01:51 and teach them to keep their mouths shut.

01:01:54 - No, no, no.

01:01:55 I should kill Kim myself, he's a friend.

01:01:59 And I'll kill the Armenians too, it'll make me feel better.

01:02:03 - Wait, wait!

01:02:04 (screaming)

01:02:06 - Greg, what about the hornet?

01:02:07 (dramatic music)

01:02:10 - Wait.

01:02:16 What you doing here?

01:02:19 - Guess what, you son of a bitch.

01:02:21 We got mail.

01:02:26 We got hornet mail!

01:02:27 - He emailed, it happened!

01:02:29 Come here, look, come here, look, look, look.

01:02:33 - Green Hornet.

01:02:34 Good job on the meth lab.

01:02:37 - Oh, the place was costing me money

01:02:39 and I wanted to shut it down anyway, that's BS.

01:02:41 Let's talk about another business venture

01:02:43 that could be mutually beneficial.

01:02:45 Please meet tomorrow at the lot on 5th and Union

01:02:48 in downtown at 4 p.m.

01:02:51 Another adventure for the Green Hornet

01:02:54 and his nameless sidekick.

01:02:56 Bum, bum, bum.

01:02:57 - Looks like we've got some planning to do.

01:03:01 It could be a trap.

01:03:03 Like how Gali killed Mangala in '87.

01:03:07 - Where did you hear that from?

01:03:09 - The History Channel.

01:03:11 - Oh yeah?

01:03:13 - Should we go downtown now and check it out?

01:03:16 - No, that's cool, I got that covered.

01:03:18 You just fill up the car with weapons

01:03:19 and stuff like that, okay?

01:03:21 - So you're just gonna come up with the plan by yourself?

01:03:25 - Bingo.

01:03:27 - I don't know if that's the best idea.

01:03:29 - Of course you don't, Kato.

01:03:30 - What's that mean?

01:03:31 - Oh, it means that you think you're an awesome karate dude

01:03:34 that can do anything and that I'm an incompetent schmuck

01:03:37 who needs a gun that shoots farts at people.

01:03:39 That's what that means.

01:03:40 - I'm just saying we should do this together.

01:03:42 - I'm just saying you should go home.

01:03:44 You should go to sleep.

01:03:44 So tomorrow you could process my incredible plan.

01:03:48 - This is so stupid.

01:03:56 We pissed this guy off.

01:03:58 Now we are walking into a meeting at his turf.

01:04:00 - We walked into their turf last time, and guess what?

01:04:02 We kicked the living crap out of them.

01:04:04 And everyone knows what happens

01:04:06 when you corner a hornet, you get stoned.

01:04:09 - You get stoned, what does that mean?

01:04:11 This is not a game, wait.

01:04:13 And you're gonna get us killed.

01:04:14 - If you don't like my plan,

01:04:16 you do not have to be a part of it.

01:04:18 - I don't even think you have a plan.

01:04:19 - I do have a plan.

01:04:20 I just haven't told it to you yet.

01:04:22 And it's amazing, okay?

01:04:24 So are you in or are you chickening out like a bitch?

01:04:27 - You are a bitch.

01:04:28 - Not now, Kato, not now.

01:04:29 Turn in here.

01:04:30 (dramatic music)

01:04:33 There they are, game faces, Kato, game faces.

01:04:39 - Shh, shh.

01:04:39 Here's the plan.

01:04:42 You take this thing, you put it in your ear.

01:04:43 You listen in on my phone, which I've taped to my chest.

01:04:46 See, when I say the secret word,

01:04:48 which is Constantinople,

01:04:50 I'll kick the old guy in the nuts,

01:04:52 you blow them up with missiles.

01:04:53 (explosion booms)

01:04:54 (Kato screams)

01:04:55 - Kato, Kato, Kato, Kato, Kato!

01:04:57 Okay, okay, okay.

01:04:58 (dramatic music)

01:05:01 This is not part of the plan.

01:05:02 It's a set.

01:05:03 (glass shatters)

01:05:05 (Kato screams)

01:05:09 And so, thunder strikes lightning.

01:05:17 (thunder rumbles)

01:05:21 - Okay, don't panic.

01:05:24 (Kato grunts)

01:05:26 The worst thing we can do right now is panic.

01:05:28 Let me think.

01:05:29 (dramatic music)

01:05:32 Okay, don't worry.

01:05:37 I'll get us out of here, okay?

01:05:38 - No, you won't.

01:05:39 We're gonna die now, you ask why.

01:05:41 - Well, with that attitude, we will.

01:05:42 Come on, man.

01:05:44 (dramatic music)

01:05:47 I think I'm claustrophobic, Kato.

01:05:50 - Let me think, let me think.

01:05:51 - Oh no, I can't breathe.

01:05:52 Listen, listen.

01:05:53 (dramatic music)

01:05:58 We're buried.

01:05:59 We are totally buried.

01:06:00 - Okay, okay.

01:06:01 - What are you doing?

01:06:03 - You're killing us, you're saving us.

01:06:05 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, this is hard.

01:06:08 That's your plan?

01:06:09 You're gonna blow us up, Kato?

01:06:10 That's not a good plan.

01:06:11 Disarm 'em, man.

01:06:13 - Shall we part?

01:06:14 Do you see electric bombs for dinner?

01:06:17 (explosion booms)

01:06:23 (Kato screams)

01:06:26 (Kato screams)

01:06:29 - Chili!

01:06:30 They killed him!

01:06:32 They killed Chili!

01:06:33 - Kato!

01:06:36 (speaking in foreign language)

01:06:41 - Run!

01:06:43 (Kato screams)

01:06:47 (dramatic music)

01:06:50 - They're throwing them in bushes, shut up!

01:06:55 (guns firing)

01:06:57 - This thing has no aim, it sucks!

01:07:01 - You have no aim.

01:07:03 (guns firing)

01:07:05 - Run!

01:07:07 (dramatic music)

01:07:10 - What?

01:07:16 (dramatic music)

01:07:24 (Kato groans)

01:07:26 - I smash the window, you shoot in.

01:07:29 - Every man for himself!

01:07:30 (dramatic music)

01:07:33 - Go away!

01:07:40 - Die!

01:07:42 - Oh shit!

01:07:43 (Kato screams)

01:07:47 (dramatic music)

01:07:50 (Kato screams)

01:07:52 (Kato screams)

01:07:55 (guns firing)

01:07:57 (Kato groans)

01:08:00 - You just gonna ignore me now, is that it?

01:08:10 Like a baby?

01:08:11 Go home, eat some baby food maybe?

01:08:15 Drink some milk?

01:08:16 Why don't you talk like a baby?

01:08:17 Mama goo goo, you baby.

01:08:20 (dramatic music)

01:08:23 Wah!

01:08:26 Wah!

01:08:27 Baby.

01:08:29 - Somehow explosions were triggered from that vehicle,

01:08:35 destroying it, but three in the green morning--

01:08:37 - Take weight.

01:08:38 - Okay, you're calling me that too now?

01:08:40 I know people call me that.

01:08:41 That's not a surprise to me, that's not a mystery, okay?

01:08:44 - Why not?

01:08:45 You say the real thing to me all day, every day.

01:08:47 That's not how partners work.

01:08:49 - We're not partners.

01:08:50 I'm the hero, you're my sidekick.

01:08:53 That's what this is.

01:08:54 I'm Indy, you're Short Round, Simon Garfunkel.

01:08:59 Scooby Doo.

01:09:01 - Stop fooling yourself.

01:09:02 The Green Hornet is nothing without me.

01:09:04 I made the knockout gas.

01:09:06 I alone designed and built the Black Beauty.

01:09:09 - And I didn't help at all?

01:09:10 - How?

01:09:11 Eject the seeds.

01:09:12 - Exactly.

01:09:14 - What a great idea.

01:09:15 You may have studied this Green Hornet thing

01:09:18 because of how much you hated your father.

01:09:21 You're an egomaniac.

01:09:22 - No.

01:09:24 - Exactly like your father.

01:09:26 - You are a jealous, pathetic little man.

01:09:30 - Fine, yeah, you're doing great with the norm.

01:09:33 - What the hell does that mean?

01:09:35 Oh, oh, don't you walk away on that.

01:09:37 What, you're charming her pants off?

01:09:39 That's what I'm supposed to believe?

01:09:41 No, that is a filthy gesture.

01:09:45 You know I like her.

01:09:46 I can find it in you, Kato.

01:09:48 I trusted you.

01:09:49 I told you I liked her.

01:09:50 - Stop it.

01:09:51 You hit on everything that moves.

01:09:53 I'm amazed you haven't hit on me yet.

01:09:55 - If you keep talking like this, Kato,

01:10:00 I'm gonna beat the living shit out of you,

01:10:02 just so you know.

01:10:03 - I'd like to see you try.

01:10:06 You're a yuppie wimp,

01:10:07 and I'm a martial arts expert

01:10:09 who grew up painless on the streets.

01:10:10 - You grew up penisless on the streets.

01:10:13 - Funny.

01:10:14 - Heroes beat sidekicks, period.

01:10:17 - Don't do that.

01:10:18 - Do what, don't poke you?

01:10:18 - I'm warning you.

01:10:19 Okay, I'm gonna forget that step,

01:10:26 so we can fix this.

01:10:28 - Okay, okay, you're right.

01:10:29 You're right.

01:10:30 Let's talk.

01:10:31 I'm sorry.

01:10:32 Sacked you like a bitch, Kato!

01:10:37 Come here!

01:10:47 You like that, Kato, you like it?

01:10:50 You're stuck in the corner of Hornet.

01:10:52 Go get her.

01:10:53 Oh, God!

01:10:54 - Hornet will cut you!

01:10:59 - Now I'm gonna hurt you.

01:11:03 - I'd like to see you try.

01:11:05 Ah, you're doing the opposite.

01:11:12 (Kato screams)

01:11:15 You dirty bastard!

01:11:19 - You idiot!

01:11:35 - Can you end this?

01:11:42 (Kato grunts)

01:11:44 - You are so stubborn.

01:11:48 - You like it?

01:12:05 You like it?

01:12:06 You like it?

01:12:06 - No, I don't like it!

01:12:07 - You like it?

01:12:08 - I don't like it!

01:12:10 (Kato grunts)

01:12:13 (glass shatters)

01:12:16 - Okay, now we can end this.

01:12:20 Just stop, just stop.

01:12:23 Just stop, stop!

01:12:24 Just stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!

01:12:28 (Kato screams)

01:12:30 - Please!

01:12:35 Please!

01:12:39 Help!

01:12:40 Help!

01:12:44 - Get out of my pool!

01:12:54 Get off my property!

01:12:57 There's a fire!

01:12:59 Never come back!

01:13:00 - No!

01:13:01 (Kato speaks in foreign language)

01:13:07 (water splashes)

01:13:10 (Kato coughs)

01:13:33 (Kato coughs)

01:13:35 (knocking)

01:13:39 - Lenore, it's me.

01:13:40 It's me, Kato.

01:13:42 (Kato grunts)

01:13:42 What the hell?

01:13:43 - That's for whatever lie you told Brit.

01:13:45 - What?

01:13:46 - He called me a scandalous mink and then he fired me.

01:13:49 - It's all been the vice of ice.

01:13:52 - Chilly was a fine warrior.

01:13:54 He was a man of honor and dignity.

01:13:58 - We must show our respect.

01:14:02 And we must show it in blood.

01:14:04 Popeye, go forth.

01:14:07 Take these words and spread them.

01:14:09 The bounty, $1 million.

01:14:12 The prey, the Green Hornet.

01:14:16 Dead, if possible.

01:14:19 Alive, if necessary.

01:14:21 I don't care whence they have to go or who they have to do.

01:14:25 I want the head of the Green Hornet

01:14:27 and I want it tonight.

01:14:28 - I'm here.

01:14:30 We'll take care of it.

01:14:32 (dramatic music)

01:14:34 - How do we do this?

01:14:41 - Everybody, chase the hornet!

01:14:44 - It's about the hornet.

01:14:45 We want him dead.

01:14:46 - All right.

01:14:47 - And you, do me a favor.

01:14:50 - Who's gonna do it?

01:14:51 - I told you I'm fine.

01:14:52 - You do this one.

01:14:54 (dramatic music)

01:14:55 - The masked one.

01:14:56 - Green. - Yeah.

01:14:57 - Yo.

01:14:58 (dramatic music)

01:15:01 - I'll get that.

01:15:02 - Get on the hornet.

01:15:03 - You'll get fucked.

01:15:04 - Good, good.

01:15:05 - I don't know what's the word.

01:15:07 - No, no.

01:15:07 I'm just a citizen.

01:15:09 - Green Hornet.

01:15:10 - You got a mask on?

01:15:11 - $1 million.

01:15:12 We want him.

01:15:13 - Got it.

01:15:14 All right.

01:15:15 - Jacko, go to the Green Hornet.

01:15:18 Take him out.

01:15:19 - Fuck you.

01:15:20 (dramatic music)

01:15:22 - Get out of here.

01:15:24 (dramatic music)

01:15:26 (punching)

01:15:29 (screaming)

01:15:36 (dramatic music)

01:15:39 - You failed to kill me, the Hornet, Popeye.

01:15:48 (doorbell ringing)

01:15:55 - I warned you about this.

01:15:57 You heightened this thing to a point

01:15:59 where it had to reach some kind of a climax.

01:16:02 Well, here it is.

01:16:04 I hope you realize now that you should stay out of my way.

01:16:10 Let me run this paper.

01:16:11 - A gruesome scene last night

01:16:19 as bodies were found all across the city,

01:16:21 every one of them wearing green clothing.

01:16:24 Investigators believe the slaughter

01:16:26 was part of a manhunt for-

01:16:27 - Hey, can I have a DA's countenance on this, please?

01:16:29 - Gang members, the victims were unrelated

01:16:31 and authorities believe their only connection

01:16:33 was in fact their choice of attire.

01:16:35 As a safety precaution, police are advising citizens

01:16:38 to avoid wearing the color green

01:16:40 so as not to be unwittingly targeted.

01:16:43 - This is my fault.

01:16:46 This is what I did with this newspaper.

01:16:47 - So what?

01:16:48 At least you tried.

01:16:49 Your dad would have understood that.

01:16:52 - Look, running a newspaper must be difficult.

01:16:55 I mean, it's not anything like running a re-election campaign.

01:16:58 It's gotta be a pain in the ass.

01:17:00 Fortunately, I think we can make each other's lives easier.

01:17:05 - How?

01:17:07 - Well, there are two sides to every story, right?

01:17:09 I mean, you know, some people, they see an event

01:17:12 and they interpret it as this crime war, you know?

01:17:16 Other people see the same incident

01:17:17 and they interpret it as a small, isolated event.

01:17:20 - Yeah.

01:17:21 - I guess I could help you decide

01:17:25 how these incidents are exposed

01:17:28 in the public interest, of course, you know?

01:17:29 Now, if this collaboration leads to a certain my position,

01:17:34 well, I will make sure that you enjoy compensation in return.

01:17:39 - What kind of compensation?

01:17:43 Frank, are you, are you like saying

01:17:48 you want me to slam the news for you for your re-election?

01:17:51 Is that what this is?

01:17:52 - I thought you needed my help.

01:17:53 We help each other out so that we can both get ahead.

01:17:58 This is mutually beneficial.

01:18:01 - Okay, I get it now.

01:18:04 You went to my dad, he rejected your offer

01:18:07 and you think you can just push me around.

01:18:10 That's what this is?

01:18:10 That's what you think?

01:18:11 - No, what I think is that you overvalue your dad's integrity.

01:18:17 - You get out of my office right this second.

01:18:20 - This might be what you're looking for.

01:18:27 - Thank you.

01:18:28 (dramatic music)

01:18:31 (dramatic music)

01:19:00 - Boss, what are you doing up here?

01:19:03 - All the guys were waiting for you, Dan.

01:19:05 - I've been doing some thinking and I had a revelation.

01:19:11 I'm obsolete, I'm a dinosaur.

01:19:16 Not in the scary way, in the extinct way.

01:19:18 And it's time for changes.

01:19:20 You know, it's time for me to gain some charisma.

01:19:25 - I've no idea what you're talking about.

01:19:30 - I'm talking about a motif, a theme, a mask.

01:19:34 Perhaps a stylish cape.

01:19:36 I'm talking about the death of Chudnovsky

01:19:39 and the rebirth of Bludnovsky.

01:19:41 What do you say?

01:19:44 - Honestly?

01:19:47 I think that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.

01:19:54 - Why is that stupid?

01:19:56 That's not stupid.

01:19:59 Bludnovsky.

01:20:00 I was gonna wear red for blood, get it?

01:20:05 That's scary and cool.

01:20:09 Get this.

01:20:11 Be it my mask or your blood,

01:20:13 red will be the last color you'll ever see.

01:20:16 I say that to people when I kill them.

01:20:20 - The Green Hornet killed Chilly.

01:20:23 I am minus an eyeball here.

01:20:26 You can't go and tell these guys that.

01:20:28 They'll think you've lost your bloody mind.

01:20:30 I think you're having a midlife crisis here.

01:20:33 Seriously, you're starting to scare me.

01:20:35 - I don't know a secret.

01:20:38 I'm starting to scare myself.

01:20:41 (gun firing)

01:20:44 - Gentlemen, the reign of Bludnovsky starts tonight.

01:20:52 (dramatic music)

01:20:55 (screaming)

01:20:57 - Get out of here!

01:20:58 - I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called you a maid.

01:20:59 I don't even know what a mink's is.

01:21:00 Look, please, just listen to me.

01:21:02 - Kato lied about us, okay?

01:21:04 You should have found that out

01:21:04 before you just go and fire me.

01:21:06 - Nothing happened?

01:21:07 - No.

01:21:07 - Oh, thank God, I knew it.

01:21:09 I knew nothing happened.

01:21:11 That ass, he said you did this.

01:21:13 - What, what is that?

01:21:14 - I don't know, but I knew it was a lie.

01:21:15 - It's disgusting.

01:21:15 - It's gross, that's not why I'm here.

01:21:16 Look, I need you to come back and work for me.

01:21:19 I'll do whatever you want.

01:21:19 I'll double your salary.

01:21:20 I'll pay you whatever you want.

01:21:21 I need you to come back and work for me.

01:21:23 I'll do whatever you want.

01:21:24 I'll double your salary.

01:21:25 Please, things at the Sentinel, not what they seem.

01:21:28 As soon as Scanlon started running for election,

01:21:31 my father stopped printing news about hard crime.

01:21:33 He was making Scanlon look good.

01:21:35 And I, I have to make it right.

01:21:38 And I realized that if I wanna do what's best

01:21:41 for this world, that the Daily Sentinel

01:21:43 is the most responsible way to do that.

01:21:46 Here's the problem.

01:21:47 I don't know anything about journalism.

01:21:50 - That's the truth.

01:21:51 - Look, I need someone who does.

01:21:55 I need someone who I can trust with my life.

01:21:58 I'm just, okay?

01:21:59 I need someone who is you.

01:22:01 I need you, Libra.

01:22:02 Will you please help me?

01:22:05 - Brett, I...

01:22:09 - I know, I know.

01:22:12 - Oh my God!

01:22:14 (grunting)

01:22:16 What is your problem?

01:22:19 God!

01:22:20 Why did you do that to me?

01:22:21 - Because you tried to kiss me.

01:22:23 - Yeah, we were gonna make out.

01:22:24 - No, we weren't.

01:22:25 - Well, then I guess I owe you an apology

01:22:27 'cause I misread that.

01:22:29 - As usual.

01:22:29 - Okay, look.

01:22:31 I'm sorry, I didn't plan on kissing you

01:22:33 when I said all that, I still mean it.

01:22:34 Will you come back and work for me, please?

01:22:35 Pretty please?

01:22:37 - Double my salary.

01:22:38 - Oh.

01:22:39 - And I want a parking spot.

01:22:40 - You don't have a parking spot?

01:22:41 - No.

01:22:42 - Oh, that sucks.

01:22:43 - And if you ever so much as look at my ass again--

01:22:46 - I can't even see your ass.

01:22:48 - I will sue you for sexual harassment, do you understand?

01:22:52 - Hugs?

01:22:53 Where my hugs at, y'all?

01:22:54 (door slams)

01:22:56 (soft music)

01:23:07 (phone ringing)

01:23:10 - Britt Reid's office.

01:23:25 - Frank Scanlon.

01:23:26 - Oh, please hold.

01:23:27 D.A. Scanlon.

01:23:29 - Really?

01:23:31 - Yes.

01:23:32 - Hello?

01:23:34 - Hey, Britt, it's Scanlon.

01:23:36 Listen, I think I owe you an apology.

01:23:39 - Too much blood in the gutter.

01:23:51 You win, let's split L.A.

01:23:53 You get the L, I get the A.

01:23:55 That means we share the gold and the work.

01:24:03 - One million dollars for today.

01:24:06 - I think you misunderstood where I was coming from in there

01:24:10 and I'd just like a chance to clarify some things.

01:24:12 - Things are pretty clear, Scanlon.

01:24:13 I got three words for you.

01:24:14 Suck it, you dick face.

01:24:16 - Look, you tell him that you wanna meet him.

01:24:18 This is journalism, okay?

01:24:19 If you wanna be an investigative reporter,

01:24:21 what you have to do is investigate.

01:24:23 Tell him that you wanna meet him.

01:24:25 - Okay, you're right, okay.

01:24:26 Watch this.

01:24:33 I was joking.

01:24:34 Yeah, why don't we get together and just talk about things?

01:24:36 That's probably a good idea, okay?

01:24:38 - Why don't we meet up for dinner, huh?

01:24:39 Little place called Kempachi.

01:24:41 - Kempachi, nice little place on La Cienega.

01:24:43 Around 8.30?

01:24:44 - La Cienega, 8.30.

01:24:51 (dramatic music)

01:24:54 (dramatic music)

01:24:56 (dramatic music)

01:24:59 (dramatic music)

01:25:06 (glass shattering)

01:25:11 (dramatic music)

01:25:14 (dramatic music)

01:25:17 - Fred.

01:25:31 - Hey, Frank.

01:25:44 - Britt.

01:25:45 - Good to see you.

01:25:46 - I'm having a sake, what are you having?

01:25:47 - Yeah, I'll have some sake, sure.

01:25:49 - Well, thanks for coming, Britt.

01:25:53 - No problem.

01:25:54 (dramatic music)

01:25:57 (tires screeching)

01:26:10 (dramatic music)

01:26:13 - Mr. Chernovsky.

01:26:28 - Blodnovsky, Blod-nov-sky.

01:26:31 I commissioned that green hornet near the chauffeur.

01:26:34 - Paller.

01:26:36 - Where's the hornet?

01:26:37 - Right there.

01:26:39 (dramatic music)

01:26:42 - Whoa, we only get half the team?

01:26:44 Who says you're the good half?

01:26:46 - Huh.

01:26:47 (dramatic music)

01:26:49 - Where's Reed?

01:26:52 - Gas.

01:26:52 - Oh, any of you move, you're dead.

01:26:58 - I'm not actually here for forgiveness, Britt.

01:27:02 - Fred, I don't understand.

01:27:03 - Yeah, you understand nothing,

01:27:05 so I'm gonna explain it to you very simply.

01:27:07 If you ever come across any article

01:27:09 regarding a major crime, a man named Benjamin Chugnovsky,

01:27:12 or anything that makes this city think

01:27:15 that I am not the fine line protecting the light

01:27:17 from the darkness, you're gonna bring it to me.

01:27:20 You're gonna bring it to me,

01:27:21 and I'm gonna tell you whether it's okay

01:27:23 for you to print in your stupid little newspaper.

01:27:25 That's how I did it with your dad.

01:27:30 And that's how you and I are gonna do it.

01:27:32 - Scanlon, are you saying you want me

01:27:37 to let you write the news?

01:27:38 - Finally, you understand.

01:27:44 - Yeah, I understand all right.

01:27:48 Here's what I understand.

01:27:51 That you son just got played by a player.

01:27:56 Recording device, USB, no, you can't have it, it's mine.

01:28:00 You stupid schmuck, I got you by the balls, Scanlon.

01:28:04 I own a newspaper, genius.

01:28:05 It's gonna be on the front page tomorrow.

01:28:07 - Well, yeah, I have to say I'm kind of impressed with you.

01:28:08 - You should be, it's impressive.

01:28:10 - Too bad it's not gonna do you any good.

01:28:11 - How could it not do me good?

01:28:12 Are you gonna kill me in the middle of this restaurant?

01:28:14 - Yes.

01:28:15 - What, you're gonna murder me?

01:28:17 - Yeah, like I murdered your father.

01:28:19 - My dad was not murdered, he died of a bee sting.

01:28:23 - No, no, your father died of an overdose of epitoxin,

01:28:26 most commonly found in a bee sting,

01:28:28 which you also happen to be allergic to.

01:28:30 But that epitoxin was administered by me.

01:28:35 (suspenseful music)

01:28:37 - Shit.

01:28:38 - Think, Bret.

01:28:39 You can figure this out, my son, with your brains.

01:28:42 - It's almost like I'm so stoned.

01:28:45 - That's right, think slowly.

01:28:48 - Okay, two years ago, Scanlon decides to run for DA.

01:28:51 He goes on the platform that he's cleaning up

01:28:53 the streets of LA, which is impossible.

01:28:55 So he asked the media to slant the news.

01:28:57 And you go along with it, like everybody else?

01:29:00 - No way, I refused.

01:29:02 - So he, shit, what does he do?

01:29:04 So Scanlon decides to go really dirty.

01:29:06 He makes a pact with the criminal.

01:29:08 Chodnowsky kills your reporter.

01:29:09 - Virtually?

01:29:10 - I didn't want any more bloodshed,

01:29:12 so I stopped reporting on crime.

01:29:13 - To be honest, in the last few years,

01:29:15 this paper has dipped in quality and ambition.

01:29:18 - Now, Scanlon can hold up his part of the deal,

01:29:20 keeping the media under control,

01:29:22 and Chodnowsky can do whatever he wants.

01:29:24 But Chodnowsky had a different plan.

01:29:28 He wanted to take over all the gangs of LA.

01:29:31 So that's when you decided to cut the strings.

01:29:34 - I couldn't look myself in the mirror.

01:29:36 I hated every word I said to you that morning, Brit.

01:29:38 - So you start reporting on crime again.

01:29:41 And now, Scanlon is a dead man

01:29:43 unless he proves he's still in control.

01:29:45 He has no choice but to organize a secret meeting with you.

01:29:48 And he kills you himself.

01:29:50 In the end, you stood up for what's right, Dad.

01:29:55 Now I have to do the same.

01:30:02 - I can see by that stupid expression

01:30:04 you've had on your face for the past five minutes

01:30:06 that you're trying to piece this together,

01:30:08 but it's no good.

01:30:09 You're about to be killed by the Green Hornet.

01:30:11 (people screaming)

01:30:16 - He's a really good sidekick!

01:30:19 He's got a gun!

01:30:20 - Blasphemy!

01:30:24 Blasphemy!

01:30:25 Eradicate him!

01:30:26 - Before you do this, I want you to know that I'm sorry.

01:30:32 I'm sorry for everything.

01:30:34 - Forgive you.

01:30:36 (people screaming)

01:30:39 - Hey, not me, him, stupid!

01:30:43 - Confused?

01:30:44 You should be.

01:30:45 (guns firing)

01:30:47 - Let's bail, Kato!

01:30:48 (guns firing)

01:30:50 - We're cornered!

01:31:01 - You know what happens when you corner a hornet?

01:31:03 - No!

01:31:04 - You get stunned.

01:31:05 - Oh, shit!

01:31:08 (guns firing)

01:31:10 - See?

01:31:16 That counts.

01:31:17 - Go, go, go!

01:31:21 (people screaming)

01:31:24 - What the hell happened?

01:31:27 - They smoked the kill.

01:31:28 Brent Reed is shooting at me!

01:31:29 - They marked the vehicle!

01:31:31 - Okay, okay, okay.

01:31:32 (tires screeching)

01:31:35 - Are you okay?

01:31:43 - Yeah, I'm fine.

01:31:46 My outfit's back here.

01:31:47 - Brent Reed is the Green Hornet!

01:31:52 - Yeah, I know.

01:31:53 You hired a guy to kill himself.

01:31:55 - Shut up!

01:31:56 - Brent Reed recorded the whole conversation

01:32:00 on some sushi drive USB.

01:32:02 Can't lose him!

01:32:03 - We're not losing him, we're following him!

01:32:05 - Okay, thank you, I need to hug you.

01:32:07 Thank you, what the hell?

01:32:09 Okay.

01:32:10 - To the house?

01:32:11 - No, here's the dealio, Kato.

01:32:12 We're gonna get this flash drive to the Sentinel.

01:32:14 It's got Scanlan's filling the beans on.

01:32:16 We're gonna put it on the net.

01:32:18 It's what my father would've wanted.

01:32:19 - You like your father now?

01:32:21 - Yes!

01:32:22 You see, he wasn't a dick after all.

01:32:24 Well, he was a dick,

01:32:25 just not really how we thought he was.

01:32:28 At the end, he wasn't a dick.

01:32:29 It's complicated.

01:32:30 I'll explain later, okay?

01:32:32 It's a lot of conflicting emotions, Kato.

01:32:33 - Let's roll.

01:32:34 - Wait!

01:32:35 (car engine revving)

01:32:38 Here's the thing, Kato, honestly,

01:32:46 I've been jealous of you this entire time.

01:32:48 You're awesome.

01:32:49 - Uh-huh.

01:32:50 - You built this whole car.

01:32:50 - I know.

01:32:51 - You know karate.

01:32:52 You're charming.

01:32:53 - Thank you.

01:32:54 - These guys are amazingly well organized.

01:32:55 (gunshots)

01:32:58 (tires screeching)

01:33:01 - Right up to the side.

01:33:12 - No guns.

01:33:13 - What's the dark on?

01:33:14 - Here!

01:33:15 (gunshots)

01:33:19 - The other side!

01:33:21 - Your turn!

01:33:24 (gunshots)

01:33:26 (tires screeching)

01:33:33 - Shit!

01:33:39 - We lost him!

01:33:44 He's gone!

01:33:45 - Yeah!

01:33:46 - He's gone!

01:33:47 - Shit, he's back!

01:33:49 - You gotta be kidding me.

01:33:50 - These guys are good.

01:33:53 - Over there, over there, over there!

01:33:55 You're not gonna make it.

01:33:55 You're not gonna make it, Jake.

01:33:58 - We're not gonna make it!

01:33:58 - Yeah, yeah, we're gonna make it!

01:34:01 - That's a very big gun.

01:34:16 (gunshots)

01:34:20 (laughing)

01:34:22 - Get him, be careful!

01:34:30 - Take the wheel.

01:34:32 - What?

01:34:33 - Take the wheel.

01:34:34 - I can't drive this thing.

01:34:35 - Yes, you can!

01:34:36 - No, Jack, that was my idea!

01:34:38 Hey, wait, what are you doing?

01:34:41 (tires screeching)

01:34:47 Are you okay up there?

01:34:48 What are you doing up there?

01:34:50 Shit, shit, get out!

01:35:04 Jesus, I don't know what anything does!

01:35:07 Why didn't you do this in English?

01:35:10 (grunting)

01:35:12 (speaking in foreign language)

01:35:18 - What are you saying?

01:35:19 - Go, sir!

01:35:19 - Just jump in!

01:35:21 - Turn the knob!

01:35:22 - These guys are shooting at me!

01:35:23 (screaming)

01:35:25 Sorry, I'm sorry!

01:35:25 - Turn the knob!

01:35:27 - I don't know what to do!

01:35:27 - Jump down!

01:35:28 - How do I stop it?

01:35:30 How do I stop it?

01:35:32 (screaming)

01:35:39 - Don't fire!

01:35:40 - It's okay, look, it's okay.

01:35:42 Next time, don't touch anything.

01:35:44 (tires screeching)

01:35:47 - Kato, look, we made it!

01:35:50 Kato, we made it!

01:35:51 - Hell yeah!

01:35:51 - Yeah!

01:35:52 - I can't.

01:35:53 - Okay, that's cool.

01:35:54 Oh, we're screwed.

01:36:03 (guns firing)

01:36:07 (tires screeching)

01:36:10 - Come on, hurry up!

01:36:26 (gun firing)

01:36:28 (gun firing)

01:36:30 - Whoops!

01:36:31 - Mr. Trevey?

01:36:36 - Yes.

01:36:37 (dramatic music)

01:36:39 - You get in, I'll cover you.

01:36:43 - Wish me luck!

01:36:45 (gun firing)

01:36:47 - Good luck!

01:36:48 (gun firing)

01:36:50 (gun firing)

01:36:54 (dramatic music)

01:36:57 (gun firing)

01:36:59 - Dear Hornet, be it my mask or your blood,

01:37:15 red will be the last--

01:37:16 (gun firing)

01:37:17 (groaning)

01:37:19 - The ring, there he is!

01:37:21 - Get him!

01:37:22 (gun firing)

01:37:23 (dramatic music)

01:37:26 - Get him!

01:37:27 (dramatic music)

01:37:30 - Let me shoot him!

01:37:32 (groaning)

01:37:34 - Oh no!

01:37:35 (groaning)

01:37:37 - Shoot to kill!

01:37:38 (gun firing)

01:37:40 - You brought a gas mask?

01:37:42 - Of course I brought a gas mask!

01:37:43 - Just for yourself?

01:37:45 (dramatic music)

01:37:47 (gun firing)

01:37:55 (groaning)

01:37:57 (groaning)

01:38:01 (gun firing)

01:38:03 (groaning)

01:38:06 - There!

01:38:12 (gun firing)

01:38:15 - He's behind the paper!

01:38:19 (gun firing)

01:38:21 (gun firing)

01:38:25 - Over here!

01:38:26 (dramatic music)

01:38:28 - Where the hell did he go?

01:38:31 He's fogged up.

01:38:32 (dramatic music)

01:38:35 - There, there!

01:38:43 (gun firing)

01:38:45 (dramatic music)

01:38:48 - Get him!

01:38:51 (gun firing)

01:38:53 - Get him!

01:38:54 - Get him, save me!

01:38:55 (dramatic music)

01:38:58 - Ha, I'm un-gas-sable!

01:39:05 (gun firing)

01:39:07 (dramatic music)

01:39:10 - Oh, get out!

01:39:15 (gun firing)

01:39:21 - That was incredibly dangerous.

01:39:24 Drop me by the elevators, I'll take it from here.

01:39:28 - No, we stay together!

01:39:34 (gun firing)

01:39:37 - Hey, get in the front seat, quick, quick!

01:39:44 (gun firing)

01:39:46 (gun firing)

01:39:49 - 10th floor, 10th floor!

01:39:54 - What's the worst, what's the worst, missiles?

01:39:56 - Four missiles left, horning gun?

01:39:58 - Check.

01:39:59 - Machine guns?

01:40:00 - Check.

01:40:01 - Is it drive?

01:40:02 - Front wheel drive.

01:40:03 (beeping)

01:40:05 (gun firing)

01:40:07 - Jake, get out of here!

01:40:12 (gun firing)

01:40:15 (tires screeching)

01:40:17 - Okay, you can let me out here.

01:40:18 (gun firing)

01:40:20 - Bazooka, guy with the bazooka!

01:40:26 (gun firing)

01:40:29 - Missile!

01:40:30 - Fire!

01:40:31 (gun firing)

01:40:33 - Reload!

01:40:42 (gun firing)

01:40:45 - Kato, they're here.

01:40:48 - Go be a journalist, I'll kick your ass.

01:40:50 - There they are, there!

01:40:52 (gun firing)

01:40:54 (gun firing)

01:40:58 (dramatic music)

01:41:01 - Okay, I'm there.

01:41:10 - In one minute, this baby's gonna be all over the world!

01:41:12 (tires screeching)

01:41:15 - Start it up, start it up.

01:41:18 - Start it up?

01:41:19 (gun firing)

01:41:22 (gun firing)

01:41:30 (gun firing)

01:41:32 (gun firing)

01:41:35 (gun firing)

01:41:47 (gun firing)

01:41:49 (dramatic music)

01:41:52 (gun firing)

01:42:00 (gun firing)

01:42:03 - Can you see him?

01:42:09 - I can't see him.

01:42:10 - I want you to see him.

01:42:12 (gun firing)

01:42:14 (dramatic music)

01:42:17 (gun firing)

01:42:21 (gun firing)

01:42:24 (dramatic music)

01:42:27 (grunting)

01:42:29 (alarm buzzing)

01:42:34 - Oh, I'm so stupid.

01:42:38 (dramatic music)

01:42:41 (gun firing)

01:42:49 - All right, Reed, hand over that thing.

01:42:53 - You want it?

01:42:54 Go get it!

01:42:55 (grunting)

01:42:57 (gun firing)

01:42:59 - Where is it?

01:43:01 Where is it?

01:43:02 - I am Blatnovsky.

01:43:04 I killed a thousand before, and I'll kill a thousand more.

01:43:06 (dramatic music)

01:43:09 - Now tremble before your death,

01:43:17 for be it my mask, or be it your blood,

01:43:20 red will be the last color you'll ever see.

01:43:23 (dramatic music)

01:43:26 (grunting)

01:43:48 (dramatic music)

01:43:50 (gun firing)

01:43:53 (dramatic music)

01:43:56 (screaming)

01:44:04 (dramatic music)

01:44:07 - Reed!

01:44:14 Reed!

01:44:15 (dramatic music)

01:44:19 (screaming)

01:44:21 - Shit.

01:44:27 - Hey!

01:44:28 - End of the road, Scanlan.

01:44:29 - Okay, okay.

01:44:30 Let's just calm down.

01:44:32 - Hand over the sushi.

01:44:34 - Yeah, hand it over.

01:44:36 - We can talk about this.

01:44:38 - On the ground now!

01:44:39 - Get him!

01:44:39 - It's the Green Hornet!

01:44:40 - Shoot him!

01:44:41 Shoot him!

01:44:42 (gun firing)

01:44:44 (dramatic music)

01:44:47 - Wait, wait.

01:44:49 I've districted Carmy Frank Scanlan.

01:44:52 That is the Green Hornet.

01:44:54 - Oh shit, wait!

01:44:55 (dramatic music)

01:44:56 - Get out of the way!

01:44:58 - Nano, I'm screwed up!

01:45:01 Scanlan's gonna get away!

01:45:02 Stop, Reed!

01:45:03 - No, he's not!

01:45:05 (screaming)

01:45:07 (dramatic music)

01:45:10 (screaming)

01:45:12 (dramatic music)

01:45:16 (screaming)

01:45:19 (explosion)

01:45:23 (screaming)

01:45:25 (screaming)

01:45:34 - Ow!

01:45:36 Oh!

01:45:37 Ow!

01:45:40 Whoa!

01:45:41 Holy shit!

01:45:46 - The ejector seats!

01:45:47 You actually built them!

01:45:50 - What's a good idea?

01:45:51 - Wow.

01:45:56 This is really scary.

01:45:59 - A brutal high-speed chase between the Green Hornet

01:46:04 and rival gang members has led to the Daily Sentinel--

01:46:07 - I called it!

01:46:08 - Leaving a trail of demolished cars

01:46:09 and trucks in their path.

01:46:11 - Here's the story.

01:46:12 We're on our way to a costume party.

01:46:14 (siren blaring)

01:46:15 - We gotta get out of our suits.

01:46:17 - Where the hell are we gonna go?

01:46:19 - No one knows why the district attorney--

01:46:22 (gunshot)

01:46:23 (screaming)

01:46:25 - No, stop!

01:46:27 (screaming)

01:46:28 Stop!

01:46:29 (gunshot)

01:46:30 (screaming)

01:46:31 - How did they know my name?

01:46:32 - It's us!

01:46:33 - It's me!

01:46:34 Huh?

01:46:35 - You assholes!

01:46:37 You assholes!

01:46:38 What the hell are you doing?

01:46:40 You guys are criminals!

01:46:41 You're criminals!

01:46:42 Oh my God!

01:46:43 - Stop!

01:46:44 - We're helping people!

01:46:45 - Why do you keep asking me to do research

01:46:47 on the Green Hornet when you are the Green Hornet?

01:46:49 - We don't know what we're doing.

01:46:50 We need you to help us, don't you see?

01:46:52 You're the mastermind!

01:46:52 - What?

01:46:53 (knocking)

01:46:54 - This is the police.

01:46:55 Please open up.

01:46:56 - Come on.

01:46:57 - We were trying to be good people.

01:46:58 - Shh, shh.

01:46:59 - Think about it.

01:47:00 - Hello, officer.

01:47:02 Can I help you?

01:47:03 - We're looking for two masked men.

01:47:05 You seen anything?

01:47:06 - Yeah, of course.

01:47:07 - Really?

01:47:08 - Yeah, they're all over the news all the time.

01:47:11 - All right.

01:47:11 But please report anything suspicious.

01:47:14 - Absolutely.

01:47:15 - You guys are some stupid assholes!

01:47:19 What are you thinking?

01:47:20 - Hey, look at us.

01:47:21 Look at me.

01:47:22 Kiss and make up later, come on.

01:47:24 - I don't kiss him!

01:47:26 - Now you're gonna bullet at me!

01:47:27 - You and I don't kiss.

01:47:28 You guys might kiss, but I don't kiss you guys!

01:47:31 - I've been shot in the shoulder.

01:47:34 - Well, then go to the hospital.

01:47:35 - No!

01:47:36 Don't you see?

01:47:37 The police know the Green Hornet was shot in the shoulder.

01:47:39 If I go to the hospital,

01:47:41 they'll know I'm the Green Hornet.

01:47:43 - Yeah, you've been shot.

01:47:44 - Ew!

01:47:45 - Here's what I need. - What?

01:47:46 - Give me a spatula to bite down on and a knife.

01:47:48 You gotta dig this bullet out of my meat.

01:47:51 Do it!

01:47:51 I'm cold!

01:47:52 It's deep inside me.

01:47:56 - Spatula.

01:47:58 - Ah, okay, okay.

01:48:00 Wait, sterilize it, sterilize it!

01:48:02 - What?

01:48:03 - Sterilize it.

01:48:03 Ster, please, I don't wanna get gangrene.

01:48:05 - Stain, stain!

01:48:06 Shandy!

01:48:07 - Shandy!

01:48:08 - Shandy forever!

01:48:09 - Okay, okay, I'm ready.

01:48:09 - It's hot.

01:48:10 - Okay, I'm ready.

01:48:11 - Three feet.

01:48:12 - Okay, just wait, just wait, just wait.

01:48:13 - Ow, it hurts!

01:48:14 Ow, okay, I can't do it.

01:48:16 Take me to the hospital.

01:48:17 - Listen, you just shut up!

01:48:18 - Ow!

01:48:19 - Okay, look, if I'm the mastermind of this,

01:48:21 just let me have a second of silence

01:48:24 so I can figure this out, okay?

01:48:27 - Mere hours ago, the Green Hornet

01:48:29 and a group of his criminal underlings

01:48:31 launched a horrendous attack on this building

01:48:34 that claimed the life of District Attorney Frank Scanlon.

01:48:38 It's unfortunate, but you know, that's what happens.

01:48:43 The Daily Sentinel will be rebuilt.

01:48:45 And to start that off, I am naming Mike Axford

01:48:49 the new editor-in-chief.

01:48:50 Mike's a great guy and he's comfortable telling me off,

01:48:54 so he's a perfect man for the job.

01:48:56 (audience applauding)

01:48:57 We have to get this paper back to the ideals

01:49:01 that my father started it on.

01:49:03 I wanna make him proud, and I hope to make this city

01:49:09 proud of the Daily Sentinel like never before.

01:49:12 (engine revving)

01:49:15 - The Green Hornet sends his regards.

01:49:19 (glass shattering)

01:49:20 (audience cheering)

01:49:23 - Directly in the shoulder!

01:49:28 Get me to the hospital!

01:49:32 - Get on the shoulder!

01:49:34 We gotta get him to a hospital right away!

01:49:36 - Golly!

01:49:37 That hurts.

01:49:39 (coughing)

01:49:41 (sirens blaring)

01:49:44 (sirens blaring)

01:49:52 (dramatic music)

01:49:55 (explosion booming)

01:49:58 - Kato, Kato!

01:50:18 - Hey!

01:50:20 - We have a secret mission.

01:50:22 Everything we've done up to now

01:50:23 is complete and utter crap.

01:50:25 This is all that matters.

01:50:27 This is it.

01:50:29 Let's roll, Kato.

01:50:30 (dramatic music)

01:50:34 It's crooked.

01:50:39 He's kinda, he's kinda looking, uh...

01:50:43 - Down?

01:50:45 - That's fine.

01:50:47 Doesn't matter.

01:50:48 We did it.

01:50:50 - We did?

01:50:53 - The Green Hornet, his reliable partner,

01:50:57 the Blue Wombat.

01:50:59 Oh!

01:51:00 Oh, man.

01:51:01 Okay, how 'bout, um, the Red Hippopotamus?

01:51:06 No, not Red Hippopotamus?

01:51:08 - He wasn't that red.

01:51:10 - I know, hornets aren't green.

01:51:11 He can't be, uh, more intelligent for us.

01:51:15 (dramatic music)

01:51:19 (roaring)

01:51:21 (roaring)

01:51:27 (roaring)

01:51:31 (roaring)

01:51:41 (dramatic music)

01:51:44 (roaring)

01:51:56 (roaring)

01:52:01 (dramatic music)

01:52:07 (gun cocks)

01:52:09 (roaring)

01:52:12 (roaring)

01:52:19 (roaring)

01:52:27 (roaring)

01:52:35 (dramatic music)

01:52:38 (roaring)

01:52:45 (roaring)

01:52:50 (dramatic music)

01:52:55 (roaring)

01:53:00 (dramatic music)

01:53:03 ♪ Baby, my love is disappearing ♪

01:53:25 ♪ It's nearly gone ♪

01:53:28 ♪ How'd it get so bad so quickly ♪

01:53:33 ♪ It just seems wrong ♪

01:53:37 ♪ I'll say goodbye ♪

01:53:41 ♪ I'll say goodbye ♪

01:53:45 ♪ If you feel there's something missing ♪

01:53:50 ♪ You'll be right ♪

01:53:53 ♪ In the morning I'll be leaving ♪

01:53:58 ♪ You'll be right ♪

01:54:01 ♪ I'll say goodbye ♪

01:54:05 ♪ I'll say goodbye ♪

01:54:09 ♪ I'll say goodbye ♪

01:54:14 ♪ Take a step aside and look what you've become ♪

01:54:20 ♪ It's a very awful world that I've become ♪

01:54:27 (dramatic music)

01:54:30 ♪ Baby, my love is disappearing ♪

01:54:51 ♪ It's nearly gone ♪

01:54:54 ♪ And how that gets so bad so bad ♪

01:54:58 ♪ It just seems wrong ♪

01:55:02 ♪ Say it again and again ♪

01:55:06 ♪ Say it again and again ♪

01:55:10 ♪ Say it again and again ♪

01:55:13 ♪ Say it again and again ♪

01:55:17 ♪ Say it again and again ♪

01:55:22 (upbeat music)

01:55:24 (upbeat music)

01:55:27 (upbeat music)

01:55:30 (upbeat music)

01:55:32 (upbeat music)

01:55:35 (upbeat music)

01:55:42 (upbeat music)

01:55:44 (upbeat music)

01:55:47 (upbeat music)

01:55:49 (upbeat music)

01:55:52 (upbeat music)

01:55:55 (upbeat music)

01:55:57 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:01 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:05 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:09 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:13 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:17 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:21 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:25 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:29 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:33 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:36 (rapping in foreign language)

01:56:40 (rapping in foreign language)

01:57:04 (rapping in foreign language)

01:57:08 (rapping in foreign language)

01:57:26 (rapping in foreign language)

01:57:30 (upbeat music)

01:57:55 (upbeat music)

01:57:58 (rapping in foreign language)

01:58:04 (rapping in foreign language)

01:58:08 (upbeat music)

01:58:33 (upbeat music)

01:58:35 (upbeat music)

01:58:38 (upbeat music)

01:58:40 (upbeat music)

01:58:43 (upbeat music)

01:58:46 (upbeat music)

01:58:48 [BLANK_AUDIO]

Category

Transcript

Recommended