Alam naming malayo pa ang summer pero narito na ang iba't ibang tips ni Allan K 'pag pumunta ka sa beach!
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FunTranscript
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00:17 What a kind Saturday night comedy bar experience.
00:20 Please welcome the gorgeous, the vivacious, the outrageous,
00:26 and the virus.
00:27 [LAUGHTER]
00:31 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:32 Woo!
00:37 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:38 Yay!
00:41 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:42 [LAUGHTER]
00:43 OK.
00:44 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:46 It's so hot.
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00:49 No way.
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01:03 Hello.
01:04 Rule number one.
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01:21 And to complete the look, [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
01:24 Green.
01:26 Green, [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
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01:32 No way.
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02:21 Tall and tan and young and lovely.
02:29 Attitude.
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02:33 Hi, Alan.
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02:36 Hi, Alan.
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03:15 Thank you.
03:16 Welcome to Comedy Bar.
03:17 Welcome to Comedy Bar.
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03:20 Thank you so much.
03:21 So Golden Screen is a [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
03:22 Best Actress Award.
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11:55 Is it new or is it old?
11:57 Super, super new
11:59 Super new, okay
12:01 Super new
12:03 You know new here
12:05 Right?
12:07 Okay, joke
12:09 Why are all prisoners smelly?
12:11 Yes, all prisoners smelly
12:13 Why are all prisoners smelly?
12:15 Why?
12:17 Wait, I will answer that
12:19 Maybe, the prisoners take a shower everyday
12:21 Everyday, too?
12:23 Everyday, yes
12:25 Maybe they take a bath everyday
12:27 Wrong
12:29 I know
12:31 Maybe
12:33 Just
12:35 Wrong
12:37 Wrong, too
12:39 Okay
12:41 Why are all prisoners smelly?
12:43 Because all of them
12:45 are in jail
12:47 That's funny, right?
12:49 That's funny, right?
12:51 Yes, welcome back to Comedy Bar
13:03 And we have a joke
13:05 for Fabio
13:07 That's why we're here
13:09 Whether you like it or like
13:11 Fabio, where's the joke?
13:13 Okay
13:15 What should you do
13:17 so you won't be touched?
13:19 I understand what he's saying
13:23 What should you do
13:25 so you won't be touched?
13:27 Yes,
13:29 you should wash your face
13:31 every night
13:33 Right, don't poop
13:35 Right?
13:37 I said it's wrong
13:39 What should you do?
13:41 Okay, listen to this
13:45 Fabio knows this
13:47 Eat an asparagus
13:49 Eat an asparagus?
13:51 Eat an asparagus?
13:53 And instead of shouting
13:55 Why is that?
13:57 Have you seen
13:59 our chicken?
14:01 Our chicken?
14:03 It's so funny
14:05 It's so funny
14:07 Super funny
14:09 It's funny, right?
14:11 I love it
14:13 I love it
14:15 What's the best?
14:17 Have you seen a chicken
14:19 that has a tongue?
14:21 Tongue
14:23 Tongue
14:25 Tongue
14:27 Tongue
14:29 Tongue
14:31 Tongue
14:33 That's what's funny
14:35 It's funny
14:37 You're there
14:39 You're there
14:41 You're there
14:43 Yes, welcome back to Comedy Bar
14:47 And here at Comedy Bar,
14:49 we're giving a chance
14:51 to the up-and-coming and talented
14:53 stand-up comedians of the moment
14:55 to show the world
14:57 that they deserve to have the chance
14:59 to make people laugh
15:01 just like what we were given
15:03 Right, and tonight
15:05 two stand-up comedians
15:07 are ready to show us all
15:09 what they're made of
15:11 Let's welcome our first comedian
15:13 for tonight
15:15 Please welcome, Tart
15:17 Thank you
15:21 Thank you
15:23 Hello
15:25 Are you okay?
15:27 I am
15:29 certified
15:31 Japayuki
15:33 And not just any Japayuki
15:35 I am the first
15:37 in Japan
15:39 Where there's no
15:41 yellow card, pink card
15:43 POEA
15:45 And no Japan International Airport
15:47 I'm already there, in other words, Thai
15:49 I just remembered
15:53 the first time I went to Japan
15:55 It was crazy
15:57 Because there was no ARB there
15:59 They gave me a seaman's book
16:01 A seaman's book
16:03 And they said
16:05 they'll put me down on the floor
16:07 And I'll just walk until I reach the pier
16:09 And I'll just walk
16:11 until I find a job
16:13 Am I the one who'll give up?
16:15 That's why I did that
16:17 I looked for
16:19 a beautiful bar
16:21 where I didn't get tired
16:23 because of my talent in singing and dancing
16:25 I got tired because I'm an artist
16:27 Artist
16:31 Because whenever I have a table
16:33 Papa, father died
16:35 Money, Papa
16:39 I'm so good at acting
16:43 The next day, happy birthday to me, Papa
16:45 Money
16:47 The next day
16:49 I got a job at that old costume
16:51 Papa, father died
16:53 Father died again?
16:55 Mother
16:57 Brother, sister, whole family died
16:59 I'm still alive
17:01 Presto
17:03 Money, money
17:05 I'm so good at acting
17:07 I didn't just become an actress there
17:09 I also became a magician
17:11 I earned more
17:13 Because whenever I have a table
17:15 They don't care
17:17 Their wallet is gone
17:19 I'm so good
17:21 That's why you're all new to Japan
17:23 Don't tell me
17:25 I'm already old
17:27 I'm already old
17:29 Certified
17:31 Japayogi
17:33 Japayogi
17:35 Japayogi
17:39 Japayogi
17:41 Japayogi
17:43 Japayogi
17:45 Japayogi
17:47 Multi-award
17:49 Japayogi
17:51 I was taught that
17:53 So she'll get sick
17:55 Thank you, Tart
17:57 No, I mean thank you
17:59 Thank you
18:01 Here's our second comedian for the night
18:03 Let's give it up for
18:05 Jelz Realm
18:07 Good evening everyone
18:09 I'm Maria Marina Marissa Maricar
18:11 Maui Rica
18:13 No one is the same
18:15 I'm not yet a chuchu
18:17 I'll tell you about my audition
18:19 I got a job at a TV station
18:21 I got a job at a TV station
18:23 I'll tell you about my audition
18:25 I got a job at a talent search
18:27 I didn't get in
18:29 I'm not good at acting
18:31 I'm not good at acting
18:33 I always get scolded
18:35 I'm always in drama
18:37 It's so annoying
18:39 I don't get it
18:41 I sing, I don't get it
18:43 I dance, I'm a mess
18:45 It's so annoying
18:47 But when I sang
18:49 A song that I put
18:51 a lot of effort into
18:53 A song that is so short
18:55 But it's full of
18:57 Inspiration
18:59 To those watching
19:01 This is my song
19:03 That I won
19:05 From my neighbor
19:07 This is the song
19:09 I sang
19:11 No lyrics
19:13 (singing)
19:15 (singing)
19:17 (singing)
19:19 (man vocalizing)
19:22 (man vocalizing)
19:25 (man vocalizing)
19:28 (man vocalizing)
19:31 (man vocalizing)
19:33 (man vocalizing)
19:36 (man vocalizing)
19:45 (man vocalizing)
19:48 (man vocalizing)
19:51 (man vocalizing)
19:53 (man vocalizing)
19:56 (man vocalizing)
19:59 (man vocalizing)
20:10 (man vocalizing)
20:13 (man vocalizing)
20:19 (audience laughing)
20:22 (speaking in foreign language)
20:26 (speaking in foreign language)
20:30 (audience laughing)
20:33 (speaking in foreign language)
20:37 (audience laughing)
20:40 (speaking in foreign language)
20:43 (audience laughing)
20:46 (speaking in foreign language)
20:50 (audience laughing)
21:10 (speaking in foreign language)
21:14, Pablo. (speaking in foreign language)
21:19 (audience cheering)
21:22 (audience cheering)
21:25 (upbeat music)
21:28 Comedy Bar would like to thank our guests for tonight.
21:55 (speaking in foreign language)
21:59 (speaking in foreign language)
22:03 The Six Feet Long Band.
22:05 (speaking in foreign language)
22:09 Yeah, yeah, let's joke for you guys.
22:12 (speaking in foreign language)
22:14 Okay, (speaking in foreign language)
22:16 Knock, knock.
22:16 Who's there?
22:17 (singing in foreign language)
22:22 (man vocalizing)
22:25 (audience laughing)
22:28 Knock, knock.
22:30 Who's there?
22:30 (speaking in foreign language)
22:33 (man vocalizing)
22:36 (audience laughing)
22:41 (speaking in foreign language)
22:45 (audience cheering)
22:48 (speaking in foreign language)
22:54 (speaking in foreign language)
22:57 (speaking in foreign language)
23:00 (speaking in foreign language)
23:04 (speaking in foreign language)
23:09 Happy birthday to our supervising editor, Greg Gomez,
23:14 and to Bernice Abunita, Noel Ubico,
23:16 Earl Panchot-Salau, Cynthia De Los Santos,
23:18 and Ray Laniada, and to all who have a birthday.
23:21 (speaking in foreign language)
23:25 (speaking in foreign language)
23:29 (audience laughing)
23:40 (speaking in foreign language)
23:44 Comedy Bar!
23:54 (speaking in foreign language)