Sino ang mag-aakala na sa Comedy Bar lang pala makikita ni Philip Lazaro ang matagal na niyang nawawalang kapatid?!
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00:00 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:00 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:02 Welcome to Comedy Bar.
00:11 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:12 Oh, yes!
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00:21 Oh, yes!
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00:23 Oh, yes!
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00:35 Yay!
00:37 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:38 Welcome!
00:47 Yes!
00:48 Thank you so much.
00:49 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
00:51 Correct!
00:59 Hello!
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01:09 Hello.
01:18 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
01:21 Thanks, all you guys, for coming here tonight.
01:23 We're going to drive the neighbors up the wall!
01:25 [CHEERING]
01:26 Oh, yes!
01:27 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
01:28 He'll drive you up the wall.
01:34 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
01:45 Virgins, please attend to our customers.
01:48 Go!
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02:34 [LAUGHTER]
02:36 Yes.
02:39 True story.
02:40 True story.
02:41 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
02:42 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
02:44 [MUSIC PLAYING]
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03:28 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
03:29 Tonight, I'm going to show you guys.
03:33 Tonight, I was taught Tagalog.
03:35 It's something unbelievable.
03:36 You guys have to check it out, this video.
03:38 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
03:39 First experience as a guru.
03:41 Ah, you are a teacher.
03:44 Oh.
03:45 You teach Tagalog.
03:46 Tagalog.
03:47 Pure Tagalog.
03:48 Can we see it?
03:49 Yes, please.
03:50 VTR, please.
03:51 Check this out.
03:52 [MUSIC PLAYING]
03:53 Hello.
03:56 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
03:57 Hey, kuya.
04:12 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
04:13 I need to ask you a question.
04:15 Can you pronounce the word, "naka susunasok"?
04:20 Naka susulasok.
04:22 Hindi.
04:23 Naka susunasok.
04:25 Naka susulasok.
04:27 Oh, my God.
04:30 OK, last chance for you, OK?
04:32 Try again.
04:33 Naka susunasok.
04:36 Naka susulasok.
04:38 Next time, kuya.
04:41 Not this time.
04:42 It was not so good.
04:43 Pero, kira, you know what's the meaning of this word?
04:46 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
04:47 The means is disgusting.
04:49 Oh, my God.
04:50 Disgusting.
04:53 Bad, no?
04:55 [NON-ENGLISH SPEECH]
04:56 Hello, Dito Sakali.
04:58 And now we're going to try to ask another person
05:01 if they can pronounce the Filipino words.
05:03 Oh, excuse me.
05:04 Excuse me.
05:06 Can you pronounce the word, "kagilala lagas"?
05:09 Kagilala lagas.
05:10 No, no, again.
05:11 Kagilala lagas.
05:13 Kagilala lagas.
05:14 OK, I'm going to give you one more chance, OK?
05:18 Kagilala lagas.
05:20 Kagilala lagas.
05:23 This is hopeless.
05:24 She's a Filipino woman, and she doesn't know how to pronounce
05:27 "kagilala lagas."
05:29 Kagilala lagas.
05:31 Hello, I'm here again, and now we're going to try
05:35 with a different person a different word.
05:37 Oh, excuse me.
05:38 Can you pronounce the word, "nakapagpapagnapagnapag"?
05:42 Nakapagpapagnapagnapag?
05:44 No.
05:45 Nakapagnapagnupagnapag.
05:47 Nakapagnapagnapagnapag.
05:49 What's happening with this word?
05:51 Nakapagnapagnupagnapag.
05:52 What's happening with this person?
05:54 OK, last chance for you, OK?
05:55 Pronounce the word, "nakapagnapagnupagnapagpag."
05:58 Nakapagnpagnupagnapag.
06:00 My best.
06:03 Unfortunately, I think he's really crazy.
06:05 The meaning of this word is something that makes you worry.
06:09 Nakpagnpagnupagnupagnpag.
06:13 I think that's the right way.
06:15 Take care.
06:19 You are the best Filipino teacher that we have seen, right, Bes?
06:24 Right?
06:25 My teacher is really good, right?
06:28 I'm sorry, Fabio, your jokes are funnier than before.
06:32 This one is not funny anymore.
06:33 Really?
06:34 Yes. Go back to the "Hind na Latex." I like that one more.
06:37 Oh, Bes, you made me cry.
06:42 Now, teach us a word. Now, teach us a word.
06:46 OK.
06:47 What's the meaning?
06:57 That means, "I love you" in the Cambodian language.
07:01 Oh, Cambodian.
07:04 Thank you.
07:11 It's a crayon for Saleh.
07:15 What's that?
07:16 French.
07:17 It's a crayon for Saleh.
07:19 What does that mean?
07:20 Ice cream for sale.
07:21 [Laughter]
07:23 [Laughter]
07:51 Wrong man, coming soon.
07:55 Welcome back to Goody Bar.
08:10 Yes.
08:11 Where are you?
08:12 Hello.
08:15 Tawa na nol, Noken.
08:16 And the bottomless song, "Sagot Namin Niya."
08:21 Thank you, Ian. Thank you, Luani.
08:23 The beer jeans.
08:24 Tonight, Bes, we have two comedians who will be joining us here in the Comedy Bar.
08:29 And to make it fun, to make it exciting, the audience needs you.
08:35 So, let's start with...
08:38 Akong.
08:40 Hello. Good evening to all of you.
08:45 Hello.
08:46 This is my first time here.
08:48 So, I'll introduce myself.
08:50 I am Akong, but I will give glory to my real name.
08:54 I am known as Amador...
08:58 Boncaras.
09:01 Amador Boncaras, my friends.
09:02 You know, singing is a good tool.
09:05 Because when I was young, I noticed that the songs have similar tones.
09:11 I'll see if I can be a singer.
09:13 I'll pretend.
09:14 Oh, yes, I'm the great pretender
09:22 Pretending that I'm doing well
09:28 My needs are such, I pretend too much
09:35 Your love puts me at the top of the world
09:41 Okay, one more.
09:43 One more, Carpenters.
09:46 When there's no getting over that rainbow
09:53 When my smallest dreams won't come true
09:58 I can't take all the madness the world has to give
10:04 Oh God, give me a reason
10:09 I'm down on bended knees
10:13 Yes, yes, okay.
10:15 And they call it my shoulder
10:23 This is my favorite.
10:26 To him, I'll still shout my feelings
10:33 To him, I'll still be happy
10:37 My heart is beating
10:39 Don't you dare think
10:42 God is still sleeping
10:46 My life is important
10:59 To him, I'll still be happy
11:03 Wait, wait.
11:06 I think I'm getting old singing.
11:08 Let's do it modern.
11:10 Can't read my, can't read my
11:14 No, you can't read my poker face
11:17 Come on Barbie, let's go party
11:19 Is that okay?
11:22 I'm coming home
11:25 I'm shouting my feelings
11:29 Even if our time has passed
11:34 I'm coming home
11:36 Okay, we're in a pogo. Thank you very much.
11:38 Acorn, ladies and gentlemen!
11:41 Welcome back to Comedy Bar!
11:56 At best, it's time for our second comedian for tonight.
12:03 The controversial, JJ Buster, Philip Lazaro!
12:09 Where? Where is he?
12:17 Where is he?
12:19 Where is he?
12:21 I heard that you're looking for a Jejemon.
12:23 That Jejemon Tulfo that I'm looking for.
12:25 Where is he?
12:27 What I can tell you is,
12:30 I'm not afraid of you,
12:33 I'm not afraid of you,
12:35 I'm not afraid of you,
12:37 I'm not afraid of you,
12:39 I'm not afraid of you,
12:41 I'm not afraid of you,
12:43 I'm not afraid of you,
12:45 I'm not afraid of you,
12:47 I'm not afraid of you,
12:49 I'm not afraid of you,
12:51 I'm not afraid of you,
12:53 I'm not afraid of you,
12:55 I'm not afraid of you,
12:57 I'm not afraid of you,
12:59 I'm not afraid of you,
13:00 I'm not afraid of you,
13:02 I'm not afraid of you,
13:04 I'm not afraid of you,
13:06 I'm not afraid of you,
13:08 I'm not afraid of you,
13:10 I'm not afraid of you,
13:12 I'm not afraid of you,
13:14 I'm not afraid of you,
13:16 I'm not afraid of you,
13:18 I'm not afraid of you,
13:20 I'm not afraid of you,
13:22 I'm not afraid of you,
13:24 I'm not afraid of you,
13:26 I'm not afraid of you,
13:28 I'm not afraid of you,
13:29 You're telling me not to care about you,
13:31 Well, if you don't want me to care about you,
13:35 Then don't loiter and don't litter,
13:37 Don't loiter,
13:39 Don't litter,
13:41 And don't litter,
13:43 Don't litter your bodies,
13:45 Not in the Philippines,
13:47 You're saying you have a fashion sense,
13:51 How can you have a fashion sense?
13:53 If you don't have fashion,
13:55 Are you still a sense?
13:58 Because what's wrong with you,
13:59 You match,
14:01 We don't match,
14:03 We coordinate,
14:05 If you coordinate pink and fuchsia,
14:08 You call it pink fuchsia,
14:10 If you coordinate yellow and blue,
14:13 You call it blue yellow,
14:15 If you coordinate black and white,
14:17 You call it ebony and ivory,
14:20 If you match checkered to checkered,
14:25 You look like a mantel,
14:27 If you match stripes and stripes,
14:30 You look like an intermediate pad paper,
14:33 If you're not content,
14:35 You match big stripes and big stripes,
14:37 You look like a pedestrian lane,
14:40 And you, you said,
14:44 You reinvent the language,
14:46 You don't reinvent the language,
14:48 Because if you reinvent something,
14:50 You should not forget the root of the invention,
14:54 We don't say sister,
14:56 We say sister,
14:58 We don't say brother,
15:00 We say brother,
15:02 We don't say cousin,
15:04 We say cuz,
15:06 That's why when we talk,
15:08 Hey sis, hey bro, where's cuz?
15:10 Oh with mother and father,
15:12 So classy,
15:14 And you gentlemen,
15:16 When you talk,
15:18 You, you're cool,
15:20 You're okay,
15:23 You're always,
15:24 And not only that,
15:29 I heard that that's a Jejemon tulfo,
15:32 It gives a cup,
15:34 It's crazy, it gives a cup,
15:37 And there's a convert Jejemon here,
15:40 Who is that?
15:42 Come here,
15:44 Thomas,
15:46 I heard that this is a convert,
15:48 Oh my God,
15:51 You are such an ugly Jejemon,
15:54 But don't worry,
15:56 Don't worry,
15:58 I will convert you,
16:00 Into an ugly Jejebuster,
16:03 Okay,
16:05 I have an invention,
16:07 It's called anti-Jejemon cologne,
16:10 When I spray this,
16:12 It will disappear,
16:14 How are you?
16:16 Oh my God,
16:19 Even animals become Jejemon,
16:21 It's crazy,
16:23 Let's try,
16:25 I will spray this to you,
16:27 Speak up,
16:29 I don't want to,
16:31 One more, one more,
16:33 Double dosage,
16:35 Okay,
16:37 I don't want to,
16:39 One more, one more,
16:41 One more,
16:44 One more, one more,
16:45 Ajajajaja, ajajajaja,
16:48 This is the last case of Jejemon,
16:51 Last,
16:53 Hey, sister,
16:58 Oh my God,
17:00 How are you doing?
17:02 Oh, you're so shy,
17:04 I miss you, my daughter,
17:06 I love it, I love it,
17:08 So I will really convert you,
17:10 Next time, I will give you a facial,
17:13 You'll give me a facial?
17:14 What kind of facial?
17:16 Facial removal,
17:18 I will make your head like a cat's,
17:20 And not just that,
17:22 I heard that Jejemon has a dance,
17:24 Is that right?
17:26 Oh my God,
17:28 We social people, we don't dance,
17:30 We don't want to perspire,
17:32 We don't dance, we just wiggle and glide,
17:34 Come on, cheer,
17:36 Jejebuster,
17:38 Follow me,
17:41 Wiggle and glide,
17:42 Wiggle, wiggle and glide,
17:45 Wiggle, wiggle and glide,
17:48 Bye-bye,
17:50 Wiggle, wiggle and glide,
17:53 Mr. Philip Lazaro,
17:55 Philip Lazaro and Tomas,
17:58 In fairness, they should call each other sister,
18:02 They look alike,
18:09 One is a cat,
18:10 Fabio, come here,
18:12 Oh sorry,
18:14 Fabio, that's so funny,
18:16 That's so funny,
18:18 Philip, come here,
18:20 Jejebuster,
18:22 Your battle with Jeje Montulfo is getting hotter,
18:25 Will they meet here at the comedy bar?
18:28 That's what we're waiting for,
18:30 I will be waiting for that,
18:32 What will you do when that day comes,
18:34 That you will face here?
18:37 I fear for his life,
18:39 We have to check that out when we see each other in person,
18:44 But before that,
18:47 That's so beautiful, Miss Tisa,
18:49 He's so beautiful in the sky,
18:51 He's also beautiful here,
18:53 Really?
18:55 I can't say it,
18:57 But before that,
18:59 I would like to invite,
19:01 I hope you will continue watching "Langit sa Pilim Niyo",
19:06 I'm there,
19:07 I'm Febbles,
19:09 Right before, 24 hours,
19:11 "Langit sa Pilim Niyo",
19:13 And my birthday show is on June 12,
19:15 And for our loyal viewers,
19:18 Leave a comment on our Facebook fanpage,
19:21 Just search for Comedy Bar,
19:23 And join us in the joy every day,
19:27 Comedy Bar will be back,
19:30 There's a corona in the house,
19:35 I'm watching you,
19:36 The closer I get,
19:38 The more I love you,
19:40 Hello!
19:50 Welcome back to Comedy Bar!
19:52 Thank you so much to everyone who supports us here in Comedy Bar,
19:56 Thank you very much!
19:58 And to Joseline, the Guzman of Pinoy TV subscriber,
20:00 From Los Angeles, California, hello!
20:04 Thank you so much to everyone who helps us,
20:06 Dr. Manny and Pike Alayan,
20:08 Dr. Bobby Ang of Asia Institute,
20:10 Dr. Steve Margan of JAOC,
20:12 And Dr. Jose Rizal,
20:14 From Tuno,
20:16 Thank you so much!
20:18 Thank you to all the studio audience for joining us tonight,
20:21 You're the most beautiful ow-jens in the world!
20:25 Ow-jens!
20:27 See you all next week, here in,
20:29 Comedy Bar!
20:32 - Bye, I will now!