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AmusantTranscription
00:00Parce qu'il y a de la bizarrité.
00:01Oui.
00:01Des choses bizarres se passent ici qui ne se passent pas dans d'autres villes.
00:03Oui, et je pense que c'est parce que c'est un programme de gouvernement secret.
00:06Vraiment ? Je pensais que c'était parce qu'ils ont construit la ville au-dessus d'un territoire ancien.
00:09Non, c'était du gouvernement.
00:10Period.
00:11Bon, le point est que personne ne sait vraiment d'où vient la bizarrité.
00:14Je le sais.
00:14C'est comme si personne ne savait pourquoi ils s'entendent avec Kevin.
00:16Tu sais comment je sais ?
00:17Comment ?
00:17Parce que mon père m'a dit.
00:18Et tu sais pour qui mon père travaille ?
00:20Le gouvernement.
00:20Kevin, ton père est un mailman.
00:22Oui, c'est vrai. Il est un employé fédéral.
00:24Ok, je pense qu'il n'y a plus de refills sur le soda.
00:25Fais attention.
00:26Ok.
00:27Regarde ton mail.
00:52Je suis un stade.
00:53Je suis un stade.
00:55Je suis un stade.
00:56Je suis un stade.
00:59Fréchement.
01:00Yep.
01:01Saxophone.
01:02Bassoon.
01:03Hum.
01:04Ça pourrait être assez difficile de prendre ça sur un bus, Jack.
01:13Excusez-moi.
01:14Oh.
01:15Attention.
01:16Aïe.
01:17Désolé.
01:18Désolé.
01:19Oh ! Oh !
01:24Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy
01:49Why do I have to meet with the principal ? Am I in trouble or something ?
01:51No dear, I think it's just a great opportunity for you.
01:53You know, colleges look at these kinds of things.
01:55What kinds of things ?
01:57I do wish you'd listen more.
01:59Just because I don't send you a text message,
02:01doesn't mean it's not important.
02:03What's not important ?
02:05Good luck today, sweetheart.
02:07Hey, something wrong ?
02:09Usual.
02:11Oh, well I like your outfit.
02:13Thank you. Hey, when's your big meeting with Dr. Myers ?
02:15You know about that too ?
02:17Ok, what was that ?
02:19Oh, they were probably talking about the video contest.
02:21What video contest ?
02:23You know, the one that your mom volunteered you for at the PTA meeting last night ?
02:25Ok, hold up. First, what ?
02:27And second, how do you know this ?
02:29Oh, my mom told me most of it.
02:31And the rest came to me last night in a really vivid dream.
02:33Oh my god, why am I always the last one to hear about what's going on in my own life ?
02:41Oh !
02:43I think it's back.
02:45Oh, the weirdness.
02:47Dude, uh, what are you wearing ?
02:49I think it's called a leotard, from what I understand.
02:51You like it ?
02:53Are you doing ballet ?
02:55No, I joined the wrestling team.
02:57Hey, we're gonna get it tonight, right fellas ?
02:59Fellas, hey !
03:01I never really pegged you as much of a wrestler, Harold.
03:03Me neither, but Coach T said they needed one more wrestler for today's meet,
03:05or they were gonna have to forfeit.
03:07And I don't want the team to forfeit.
03:09Right, right, right.
03:11Plus, uh, Coach T said if I didn't join, I failed you.
03:13Man, I don't think you can actually fail, Jim.
03:15You can't ?
03:17But Coach T said I...
03:19Man, you, my friend, have been outsmarted by a wrestling coach.
03:21No.
03:23Yeah, yeah.
03:25Anyway, Coach T gave me this sweet uniform to wear for match day.
03:27Right, right, real sweet.
03:29You know, what time's your match, man ?
03:314 o'clock.
03:33And it's now 8 a.m.
03:35Yeah.
03:37So you sure you're supposed to be wearing that uniform all day ?
03:39I...
03:41You know, players all wear their jerseys on game days, I...
03:43It's not the same, is it ?
03:45No.
03:47Well, you know, it could be worse.
03:49What do you mean ?
03:51Well, you know, no one knows for sure yet,
03:53but it looks like the weird stuff is happening to people when they start to sweat.
03:55And you have no clothes on, basically.
03:57So you're less likely to sweat.
03:59So there you go.
04:01Although you do look a little hot in that jacket.
04:03What is that, wool ?
04:05Wool material ?
04:07Yeah, yeah, I think so.
04:09All right, man, good luck. See you at lunch.
04:11All right, uh, thanks, Kev !
04:31And so good luck to Mr. McGlinchey
04:33and the entire chess team.
04:35Should be quite an exciting night.
04:37Yes.
04:39And that's night, of course, with a K.
04:41And lastly, student,
04:43tricky,
04:45it appears as though the weirdness has returned,
04:47but it seems to be linked somehow to insecurity and perspiration,
04:49which is nothing to be embarrassed about.
04:51We all sweat,
04:53and we all have certain traits or things that we feel a little, you know,
04:55funny about.
04:57Just remember, we're all in this together.
04:59Hey, so what if you happen to have an unusually large nose ?
05:03Or you wear really, really thick glasses ?
05:07Or you woke up today with bad breath.
05:09I mean the really stinking bad breath.
05:13Who cares ?
05:15We here at O'Grady celebrate each and every one of you
05:17for your own unique personal diversity.
05:19Good luck.
05:21Oh, also, I'm sorry to report that the air conditioning system is still out of order,
05:23but we have already restored A.C. to several critical areas.
05:25And that is all,
05:27so have a great O'Grady day !
05:29Ah, thanks for waiting.
05:31Would you girls like some cocoa ?
05:33No, thanks, Dr. Myers.
05:35My mom wasn't really specific.
05:37Okay, Abby, I'm gonna level with you.
05:39Running a school like ours isn't always easy, you know.
05:41Dealing with the weirdness costs money,
05:43and we often have to improvise,
05:45you know, in order to cover costs.
05:47Dr. Myers, does this have something to do with...
05:49We're out of money, okay ? Is that what you want to hear ?
05:51No, you're so loud.
05:53We had to lay off the cafeteria staff, sell the freezers,
05:55the microwaves, the soft serve.
05:57I had to shut off the water bubblers, everything.
05:59All we have left are five crates of fish sticks.
06:01Ew.
06:03We did some research and found out about a special program
06:05being offered by the folks at Ultra Chicken.
06:07Dr. Myers, what does it have to do with us ?
06:09Everything, Abby ! Don't you see ?
06:11No.
06:13You can save lunch !
06:15Here, here, groove on this.
06:17Since the dawn of time,
06:19man has eaten chicken for food.
06:21He has also gone to school.
06:23Here at Ultra Chicken International,
06:25we are committed to this deeply interwoven relationship.
06:27That doesn't make any sense.
06:29That's why we're proud to introduce
06:31the Youth of America Contest.
06:33We will choose one lucky school from each state
06:35to receive a brand new Ultra Chicken franchise
06:37to be placed in their school's cafeteria
06:39with free lunch for one whole year.
06:41One whole year of delicious Ultra Chicken,
06:43fried chicken with all the fixings.
06:45Mashed potatoes and gravy,
06:47stuffing,
06:49creamed corn,
06:51and, of course,
06:53Ultra Chicken's famous farm-style biscuits.
06:55Anyone hungry yet ?
06:57Oh, my God, yes !
06:59Oh, no.
07:01I'm a vegetarian.
07:03Not for long.
07:05All your school has to do is submit
07:07your student-made video yearbook.
07:09Show us how your school best represents
07:11our core demographic of typical normal high school-aged youths.
07:13And the ultimate Ultra Chicken cafeteria
07:15could be yours.
07:17The winning school is subject to all rules and conditions
07:19as outlined in subset B of page 35.
07:21Wait, what's he saying there ?
07:23Nothing, nothing.
07:25What did he just say ?
07:27What ?
07:29What ?
07:31So, basically, you're selling the school out.
07:33Not basically.
07:35Yeah, yeah.
07:37Now, don't screw this up.
07:39I still don't understand why you're picking me for this.
07:41I don't have any school spirit.
07:43Well, because the rules say that a student
07:45has to put together the video,
07:47and your mom said you'd be the perfect choice
07:49because of all your experience.
07:51What ? What is she talking about ?
07:53Well, you just got that camera phone.
07:55All we have to do is show old Grady High
07:57for what we really are,
07:59a typical normal American high school.
08:01No problem.
08:03Is this chem lab ?
08:05Uh, no.
08:07See how normal that was ?
08:09Fine, just give me the camera. Let's go back.
08:11Okay.
08:13Did I tell her it's due tomorrow ?
08:15No.
08:17Did she hear me ?
08:19Yes.
08:21I don't even like Ultra Chicken.
08:23Oh my God.
08:25My mom is ruining my life.
08:27I'm going to kill her.
08:29What ?
08:31Okay, you just sing-talked.
08:33I did ? You did. I did. No, you really did.
08:35Oh my God. My mom does that.
08:37Oh my God, you're your mom.
08:39Shut up. Now you're Abby.
08:41Kevin ?
08:43What's up ? You guys finished yet ?
08:45No, smartass, we're not finished yet.
08:47You wanna help ?
08:49Oh, I would be honored.
08:51Yeah, I can see a little left on your shirt.
08:53Ew.
08:55Uh, that's not from breakfast.
08:57Ew.
08:59Okay, well then, do you know anyone else
09:01who would want this get-out-of-class-all-day pass ?
09:03Maybe.
09:05So, all we have to do is make O'Grady look normal.
09:07Okay ? Beth ?
09:09Ready. Then, action.
09:11Well, so far, so good.
09:21Welcome to the science department.
09:23Here you see several pursuits for the enthusiast.
09:25For example, chemistry, physics,
09:27astronomy, and for those daring of spirit,
09:29botany.
09:31Cut.
09:33Well, I think that's what they call a keeper.
09:35I felt good, like we were really interacting.
09:37Okay, two steps back.
09:39I think it was a little step.
09:41Let's do another take, one with more emotion.
09:43Do you think you can handle that ?
09:45As you wish, milady.
09:47Because I don't have all day to spend on this one little scene.
09:49Okay, no problem, sure.
09:51Oh, and try and tone down the lisp
09:53on this one, dude.
09:55I don't have a lisp.
09:57I don't have a lisp.
09:59And, action. I love doing that.
10:01The science department.
10:03Here you see several pursuits for the enthusiast.
10:05For example,
10:07chemistry, physics,
10:09astronomy, and for those daring of spirit,
10:11botany.
10:13I wanted the camera here so that we could get
10:15Jeffrey here looking
10:17toward the lockers and still have a line
10:19of lockers to the right of him going onwards
10:21toward infinity.
10:23But we can't, the water fountain's in the way.
10:25Beth, we don't use the word can't here until we've tried.
10:27But nothing. I said try.
10:29So you better darn well try, young lady.
10:31Abby, are you okay ?
10:33I'm fine.
10:35Okay, okay, okay, everyone calm down.
10:37Beth, Mrs. Wilde, I got an idea.
10:39If we put the camera here,
10:41not only does it give depth to the shot
10:43like you wanted, but it doesn't make Jeffrey
10:45look so short.
10:47Um, short ?
10:49Kevin ! Oops, my bad.
10:51So, first of all, let me say
10:53you look fantastic. Thanks, Abby.
10:55Are we ready to shoot ? Ready.
10:57Um, don't you think you should...
10:59Ready ? Then, action.
11:01Abby ? Cut. What ?
11:03Found you ! Yeah. Yeah.
11:05Lipschitz said you'd be in Mrs. Shapiro's room.
11:07Uh-huh. Yep.
11:09So, uh, you're filming Mrs. Shapiro.
11:11Yeah. How's it, uh,
11:13going ? Fine, fine.
11:15Just trying to get started here.
11:17Yeah, yeah. Any, uh, problems ?
11:19No, she looks great. Really ?
11:21What about her mustache ?
11:23Oh, my God.
11:25Am I on speakerphone ? Yeah.
11:29Okay, now, can someone come up to the board
11:31and show us how to solve this problem ?
11:33Um...
11:35Harold, come up here
11:37and give this a shot, huh ? Okay.
11:39Action.
11:47Okay, Harold, that's enough.
11:49Good job. Please, go sit down.
11:51Thanks, Mr. Lipschitz. I appreciate it.
11:53Chad, how about you give this a shot ?
11:57Oh, no, Lord.
12:01Weird. Weird.
12:03Way too weird. Weird ?
12:05Disgusting.
12:07Let's break for lunch. Okay.
12:09Hey, man, have you tried to throw in
12:11something over that outfit ?
12:13Wow.
12:15I just want this day to end.
12:17No, no, you don't, man.
12:19The end of the day is when you have your match
12:21and you get killed.
12:23But don't worry, we'll be there to film it
12:25so that we can embarrass you later.
12:27Yeah, great. Thanks. Appreciate it, Kev.
12:29Thank you so much. Don't worry about it.
12:31Listen, a little advice on how to handle the weirdness,
12:33all right ? Just know that you're cool.
12:35It's all in your mind, all right ?
12:37It's all in the mind, my friend, all right ?
12:39That's how I'm avoiding it.
12:41Hey, it really does work.
12:43You don't even care about that mullet on top of your head.
12:45Huh ? Tell me I have a mullet on my head ?
12:47Right, right, right, right.
12:49Oh, my God.
12:51Uh, Harold, I gotta go.
12:53I gotta do a video thing, right ?
12:55So, yeah, good luck with your... I gotta go.
12:57All right, see you. Oh, man.
12:59And thanks !
13:01Okay, it's all in the mind, Harold.
13:03Okay, that should take care of Mrs. Wilde.
13:05Bye-bye, Mom.
13:07Oh, can I have some of that ?
13:09Yeah, but why ? This isn't affecting you at all.
13:11Are you kidding ?
13:13No, I mean...
13:15Look at me !
13:17What are you talking about ?
13:19Hello, my chi is way off-center. I'm a mess.
13:21Okay, look. Did you see that ?
13:23No.
13:25My aura just shifted.
13:27Okay, relax, Beth.
13:29No, I can't relax. Can I please have the deodorant ?
13:31I'm just putting on my face.
13:33Okay, well, what else do we have left to film ?
13:35Well, there's school spirit.
13:37Oh, great, Susan. I almost forgot.
13:39Susan ?
13:41Yeah, our ace in the hole, Susan.
13:43She wrote that awesome poem about school spirit.
13:45She's gonna read it on camera.
13:47No, I remember Susan. It's just that...
13:49What ?
13:51Well, they sent her home. Someone called her Fish Face.
13:53Okay, no problem.
13:55No problem, Beth. I don't want you to worry, okay ?
13:57Because I'm sure there are plenty of other people to film.
13:59The whole school can't be full of insecure freaks, right ?
14:01Right.
14:03Right.
14:05You ready ?
14:07I'm ready.
14:09Okay, let's see who wants to be a star.
14:11Okay.
14:13We're in trouble.
14:19Chemistry ?
14:21Physics ?
14:23Maths ?
14:25Maths !
14:27Shall I compare thee to a summer's day ?
14:29Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
14:31And that's why I enjoy cheering for football
14:33just a little better than I enjoy cheering for basketball.
14:35Woo !
14:37Go owls !
14:39And cut. That was great.
14:41Should we get some makeup ?
14:43What for ?
14:45For her...
14:47Oh, you mean for that big zit on her nose ?
14:49What ? Cut ! Just cut !
14:51Oh God.
14:53Come on, Abby, it's not that bad.
14:55Nous n'allons pas avoir l'Ultra Fast Food Cafeteria et tout le monde va me blâmer.
14:58Et j'ai demandé pour ça ? Non.
14:59Mais c'est d'une certaine façon mon faute,
15:01parce que je n'ai pas fait le plus d'opportunités !
15:04Ok, au début, j'essayais d'être cool sur tout ce que tu fais pour ton mère,
15:08mais c'est vraiment en train de me faire peur.
15:10Je ne t'aide pas, jeune dame !
15:12Comme ça.
15:13Ouh !
15:13C'est totalement creusant.
15:14Vous savez quoi ? Oubliez-le.
15:16J'ai quitté, c'est fini.
15:17Alors ça veut dire que nous ne pouvons pas filmer Harold en jouant ?
15:19Kevin ?
15:20Hey, qu'est-ce qu'il y a ?
15:21Hum, où es-tu ?
15:23Hum, là-bas.
15:24Pourquoi es-tu caché dans la salle ?
15:25Je ne suis pas caché.
15:26Avec ce gros micro.
15:27Ah.
15:27C'est notre conversation.
15:28Regarde, je lui ai promis qu'on filmerait, tu sais.
15:31Alors...
15:31Kevin, sors.
15:32Hum, je suis cool.
15:33Je suis cool ici.
15:34Kevin, sors d'ici.
15:34Je ne peux pas te voir.
15:35Qu'est-ce qu'il y a ?
15:36Pourquoi es-tu si bizarre ?
15:37Je ne suis pas.
15:39Hey.
15:39Oh mon dieu.
15:40Est-ce que tu portes un masque ?
15:42Merci, d'accord ?
15:43Merci, merci.
15:44Merci.
15:45Merci pour la sensibilité.
15:46Ça a l'air bien.
15:46Ça a l'air bien.
15:47Pourquoi n'est-ce pas que tu portes un masque ?
15:51C'est drôle.
15:51Qu'est-ce qu'on appelle ça aujourd'hui ?
15:52Est-ce qu'on l'appelle encore Mollet ?
15:53Ou est-ce qu'on l'appelle Hockey Hair ?
15:54Le Waterfall de Kentucky.
15:55Le business à l'avant.
15:56La fête à l'arrière.
15:57Oh, les filles savent beaucoup sur Mollet.
15:59Pas autant que toi.
16:00Bon, calmez-vous, d'accord ?
16:01Je ne t'ai pas amusé quand tu es devenu ta mère.
16:03Oui, tu l'as fait.
16:04Tu l'as totalement fait.
16:05Oui.
16:05Ah oui, c'est vrai, je l'ai fait.
16:07Mais c'était drôle.
16:08Vous savez quoi, les gars ?
16:09O'Grady est différent.
16:10Nous n'avons pas l'air d'être des élèves de l'école.
16:12Nous sommes intéressants et amusants.
16:14Et plein de charme.
16:15Vous savez quoi ?
16:16Nous allons terminer cette vidéo.
16:17Et nous allons utiliser toute la footage qu'on a filmé aujourd'hui.
16:20C'était génial, Abby.
16:21Merci.
16:22C'était vraiment génial.
16:23Je l'aime beaucoup, ton Mollet.
16:24Ça m'a un peu inspirée.
16:25Oui.
16:28Maintenant, vous vous rappelez, les gars.
16:29Peu importe ce qui se passe, continuez de filmer.
16:30Et entre les matchs,
16:31prenez autant de photos que possible
16:32de visages bizarres dans le public.
16:33J'ai compris.
16:34Ecoutez ce public.
16:35Harold doit être en colère en ce moment.
16:36Je ne sais pas.
16:37Je pense que Harold pourrait gagner.
16:38Vous savez, j'ai toujours senti un fort esprit de lutte en lui.
16:40Maintenant, écoutez-moi.
16:41Je ne m'importe pas si vous avez peur de marcher là-bas
16:43devant tout le monde, vous savez,
16:45dans un paire de pantalons de spandex
16:47qui ne vous donnent rien à l'imagination.
16:49Je ne m'importe pas si un seul coup de perspiration
16:51va instantanément vous transformer en un fric physique garanti.
16:55Vous allez aller là-bas.
16:57Et vous allez faire le Grady High plus fier de vous.
17:00Maintenant, allons-y, Owls !
17:04Hmm.
17:05L'équipe de visite n'a pas l'air affectée par l'étrange.
17:07Elles ne l'ont jamais.
17:08Vous avez comme un désavantage de gym à la maison.
17:10Mais ils ont l'air un peu effrayés d'être ici.
17:12C'est l'avantage du gym à la maison.
17:13Tout s'améliore.
17:14Hmm.
17:15Comment allez-vous ?
17:17Oh, salut.
17:17Wow !
17:18Vous savez, je suis heureux que j'aie décidé de sortir de mon bureau.
17:21Si ces enfants peuvent briser le feu
17:22et montrer ce genre d'esprit de l'école,
17:24alors je peux aussi.
17:25En plus, je suis un adulte avec un doctorat,
17:27quelque part.
17:28Je n'ai rien à avoir d'insécurité.
17:29Popcorn !
17:30Ouh !
17:31Popcorn !
17:32Hey !
17:33Hey ! Save me a seat !
17:34Oh, Lord !
17:37Watch your footwork !
17:42Winner !
17:47Go get'em, son !
17:48Oh, Dad !
17:53Winner !
17:55Winner !
17:57Wow, I thought I had a chance that time.
17:59What is wrong with you, ladies ?
18:01Isn't anyone gonna put up a fight here ?
18:03Show a little spine ?
18:04A little backbone ?
18:06All right, all right, all right.
18:07Who's up next here ?
18:08Harold Jenkins.
18:09Jenkins !
18:10Where the heck is Harold ?
18:11Yeah, where is Harold ?
18:13Jenkins !
18:14Harold Jenkins !
18:15You have six points.
18:16Six points !
18:17Six points !
18:18Six points !
18:19Six points !
18:20Six points !
18:21Six points !
18:22Six points !
18:23Harold Jenkins, you have 60 seconds to report to the mat.
18:27Harold, what are you doing ?
18:28Failing, Jim.
18:29I can't go out there like this.
18:31Harold, man, for the first time all day,
18:33your outfit is actually appropriate for the situation.
18:35Look, I know you said it's all in the mind,
18:37but this is not the mind.
18:38This is the body.
18:39And those guys are huge.
18:40If I go out there, they're gonna kill me.
18:42They're gonna take my leotard and wrap it around my neck.
18:44I'm too skinny for this.
18:45I can't do this.
18:46Um, I don't know, dude.
18:47I mean, if anything, I'd say you're starting to look a little chubby.
18:50What ?
18:51Yeah.
18:52I don't think I'm the only one who's noticed, man.
18:54Really ?
18:55Yeah, yeah, yeah.
18:56I mean, when you showed up in that outfit today,
18:58I didn't want to say anything, but let's face it,
19:00you know, you, uh, you're starting to pack on the pounds.
19:05Wow, wow.
19:07Well, it looks like Harold Jenkins is going to forfeit.
19:10What ?
19:11Harold Jenkins is going to fight.
19:13Harold Jenkins is going to fight !
19:15How about that, folks ?
19:17This is what it's all about !
19:22Bring it on, baby !
19:36Winner !
19:40Oh, my God.
19:41Beth, are you getting this ?
19:42Tell me you're getting this.
19:43I'm getting it.
19:44Oh, my God, this is awesome.
19:45Beth, did you see that ?
19:46Yeah.
19:47Get that guy over there.
19:48Pan over there.
19:49Where ?
19:50Right over there.
19:51Yeah !
20:00Prêt ?
20:01Prends-le.
20:02Ça ne se passe pas.
20:03Putain.
20:04J'essaie encore le Razer.
20:05Ça doit se recharger.
20:06C'est tellement injuste.
20:07Et toi, tu as été robé, Harold.
20:08Tu sais, tu es déséquilibré parce que tu étais hors de ton classement.
20:11Quoi qu'il en soit.
20:12Au moins, on a fini la vidéo.
20:13Et c'est plutôt bien.
20:14Merci.
20:15Tu sais, je suis fière de ça.
20:16Tu penses qu'il y a de la chance de gagner ?
20:17Euh, non.
20:18Je pense pas.
20:19Pas du tout.
20:20Ok, les gars, je comprends.
20:21Vous ne pensez pas qu'on va gagner.
20:22Je ne sais pas.
20:23Notre vidéo a dû être l'une des plus originelles.
20:25Peut-être qu'on a une chance.
20:31Oh, Grady, salut.
20:32Demain, c'est les leaders de l'Amérique.
20:45Non, non, non.
20:50Non, non, non.
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21:33Non, non, non.
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21:41Non, non, non.
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21:45Non, non, non.
21:46Non, non, non.