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00:00This is a Touhou Project derivative work. If you don't mind, please enjoy it.
00:30This is a Touhou Project derivative work. If you don't mind, please enjoy it.
01:01Who am I?
01:06Diagnosis, amnesia.
01:30This is a Touhou Project derivative work. If you don't mind, please enjoy it.
01:56Impressive.
01:58All this to hide a submarine refueling station. Our scanners picked it up anyway.
02:03I'd like to see how Dr. X hides his car.
02:05You'll be seeing him soon. Ask him yourself, if you dare.
02:08X is here?
02:10What, was that a bad day for blowing up warehouses?
02:13I'm warning you, Action Man, shut up!
02:15Or what, we're gonna run instead of walk to X?
02:23Hey you, come over here!
02:26Now, here's what's gonna happen.
02:28We have to escort the prisoner to Dr. X within the next five minutes.
02:32We have to comply with the protocols of the warehouse.
02:35Dr. X stands against that.
02:37However, in order to complete the task he has set for us,
02:42there is no way to be rewarded.
02:48Hey you, don't move!
02:50You better move, guys.
02:52This place is gonna blow. You haven't got much time.
02:57Okay, now you've got time.
02:59But not for long.
03:11Action 4, the bomb has not been set.
03:13Time to change plans.
03:23Ah!
03:28I can still disable X's station with this grenade.
03:36Ten, nine...
03:39Your timing is really bad, pal.
03:44Seven, six, five, four,
03:47three, two,
03:51one.
04:03Mission accomplished, Action 4.
04:06Come and get me before the bad guys catch up with me.
04:09We are on our way, Action 1. Over.
04:20Action 2, the bomb has not been set.
04:51Action 3, the bomb has not been set.
05:17Congratulations, Doctor.
05:19You are the first to witness my genius.
05:22Indeed? I hope you're right, Professor Marcuzzi.
05:26It would not be wise to disappoint me.
05:29You'll get your money's worth.
05:31And I'll have my vindication.
05:36I expected something larger.
05:38You lack imagination.
05:40This device can lift an aircraft or an aircraft carrier.
05:44It works?
05:45Allow me to present the culmination of years of research.
05:48The world's first anti-gravity device.
06:12Now watch this.
06:19A most impressive demonstration, Professor.
06:22Well done.
06:30May I?
06:32Of course.
06:33At last, I will have the respect I deserved.
06:38Let's keep this our little secret.
06:42Huh? No!
06:45No!
06:49No!
06:51My life's work.
06:52Good day, Professor.
07:06I'll fix you, X. You'll pay for this.
07:10Station Extreme, come in.
07:12This is Secretary Norris speaking.
07:15We are on the brink of humanity's most historic moment.
07:19A turning point in world history.
07:21An event so profound, so momentous.
07:24All right already. Cut to the chase.
07:26The European Space Agency has confirmed our first contact with extraterrestrial beings.
07:32Their ambassador will be arriving in 15 minutes.
07:35That's not a lot of warning.
07:37Agreed. I want you and your team on standby.
07:40Are they hostile?
07:41Their message says they come in peace, but...
07:43It always pays to be careful.
07:45Exactly. Norris out.
07:49That's odd. I'm not registering any alien craft.
07:52Keep looking. I'm sure it'll show up soon.
07:55So, team, let's get extreme!
08:13Extreme!
08:20Extreme!
08:21Extreme!
08:39Ladies and gentlemen, we are just seconds away from the world's first public contact with aliens from outer space.
08:45Secretary Norris of the World Security Council will be coming out to greet them.
08:49There he is now.
08:51Ladies and gentlemen, the aliens have arrived. The aliens have arrived.
08:58On behalf of the people of the world, welcome to planet Earth.
09:02People of Earth, prepare to surrender.
09:06Now, just a minute.
09:10Ladies and gentlemen, this is terrible. The aliens have attacked.
09:14You said you came in peace.
09:16I lied.
09:18Order our security forces to return fire.
09:48No!
10:19No!
10:38We're going in. Give them every laser we've got.
10:49I can't shake them.
10:56Navigation and gyroscopic computers are offline. We're losing control.
11:00We've got to clear the city and put her down, or no one will get hurt.
11:03I'll get her as far out to sea as possible.
11:05You two take the heli-gun and get out of here.
11:07That's an order. I'll radio my coordinates to you.
11:10Meanwhile, find Secretary Norris.
11:12Yes, sir.
11:14Power weapons are no match for those of the aliens.
11:16After such a horrifying act of aggression, what can they want?
11:20Attention, men and people.
11:23You have felt our power.
11:25Now observe our strength.
11:27We will not surrender.
11:29We will not surrender.
11:31We will not surrender.
11:33We will not surrender.
11:35We will not surrender.
11:37We will not surrender.
11:39We will not surrender.
11:41Now observe our strength.
11:44Resistance is futile.
11:46There is no escape.
11:48For we are everywhere.
11:50Surrender immediately and be spared.
11:54All face the consequences.
12:06Action One, do you read me?
12:08Action One, come in, please!
12:11Action One, do you read?
12:13Any luck, Chuck?
12:14Not yet.
12:15Don't worry.
12:16It takes more than invaders from Mars to take out Action Man.
12:19Chuck, the aliens must have some weakness.
12:21We've got to find it.
12:23I'll get right on it.
12:29Come in, Station Extreme!
12:31Action Man!
12:32Tu es super!
12:42Oh...
12:52So, Knock, how about a picnic?
12:55On my way, A.M.
12:59There's something not quite right with this alleged extraterrestrial craft.
13:03Let's see that again.
13:07And freeze frame?
13:10I thought so!
13:11It's a fake!
13:15Norris has agreed to discuss terms of surrender.
13:17But we can't just give up.
13:19Station Extreme to Action One.
13:20Go ahead, Chuck.
13:22These aliens aren't aliens at all.
13:24Guess what?
13:25I analyzed the voiceprint.
13:26It's you-know-who.
13:28Doctor X.
13:29I knew it!
13:30Good work, Chuck.
13:31Now, what about the craft and those incredible weapons?
13:34Actually, they're conventional Earth weapons.
13:37They act as if they're unaffected by gravity.
13:39Action Man.
13:40We need you here ASAP.
13:42There's a Professor Mark Rousey on the line,
13:45and he's got something I want you to hear.
13:47How many times do I have to tell you
13:49Doctor X has my anti-gravity machine
13:51inside that fraudulent alien spaceship?
13:54The man is a thief.
13:55A liar and a thief.
13:57You must get my invention back.
13:59But our weapons are powerless.
14:02Of course.
14:03The piezo-electromagnetism will repel all metals.
14:06You must use plastic projectiles
14:08or plastic explosives.
14:10Here is where the unit is located.
14:12Here is where you must attack.
14:14Thank you, Professor.
14:15That solves one problem.
14:17Now, how to get someone on board
14:19to distract these so-called aliens.
14:21Guess that means me.
14:36Five seconds to launch point AM.
14:55Is your stealth glider deployed?
14:57Roger.
14:58They'll never see you coming.
14:59Like they say in the movies, break a leg.
15:06We've got you, Secretary Naresh.
15:25Surprise!
15:29I liked the first one better.
15:32Ah!
15:58What? I give!
16:01I'm on my way, Nat.
16:27Leave her! We have to go!
16:38Action Man? Action Man!
16:42Well, here goes nothing.
16:47Ah!
16:49Action Man!
16:55Hey, Nat, where are you going?
16:58Uh-oh. There goes the wing.
17:00Hold on!
17:02Ah!
17:12Thanks for the lift.
17:14My pleasure.
17:26Action 2, come in.
17:28Go ahead, Jock.
17:30The other UFOs, they're gone.
17:32Vanished. They were holograms.
17:35Ha! Fakes, just like Dr. X.
17:43We can't stay long. Gotta pick up the new Jet Extreme.
17:46We will, but first...
17:48Action Man, this way, quickly. I'm a very busy man.
17:54Your new anti-gravity device?
17:56With a few modest improvements, you will be amazed.
17:59I'm sure.
18:04Oh, no! That abominable Dr. X! This is all his fault!
18:09Keep working on it, Professor. We need a man like you on our side.
18:13A man of vision, a true scientific genius.
18:17But of course. Why, by the time I see you again,
18:20I will have solved the puzzle of anti-gravity
18:22and deciphered the secret of all chemical transmutation.
18:26I will turn lead into gold, brass into silver, and then...
18:30Goodbye, Dr. Marcuzzi.
18:44Load action memory file.
18:47Loading.
18:49Virtual memory scan.
19:11Ah, the Himalayan monastery again.
19:14I assume that's me crawling like a beaten dog.
19:17Vyra, confirm.
19:19Probability 99%.
19:22This must have been where I met the mysterious monk.
19:26Whatever I did, he didn't like it.
19:28Vyra, is that a tattoo on his arm?
19:31Insufficient data.
19:33Let's try an easy one. Vyra, what is he saying?
19:36Translation, please.
19:38Language Tibetan. Translation.
19:41No posterior region, oh slow-moving one.
19:47But I wasn't always so slow.
19:50Vyra, who's throwing things at me?
19:52Insufficient data.
19:54Sequence-related files.
19:58No, not this!
20:00Vyra, someday it will all make sense. I swear it!
20:05Memory file indexing.
20:12Did you know the energy saved by recycling one aluminum can could run your TV for three hours?
20:17One can. Three hours.
20:20That's six episodes of me.
20:22I like this recycling thing.
20:24Here's what you need to do.
20:25Reduce, reuse, recycle.
20:28Reduce what you use.
20:30When you buy something small, tell the clerk you don't need the bag.
20:33Reuse your lunch bags, your thermos, and aluminum foil.
20:37Recycle soda cans, glass bottles, and newspaper.
20:40It's not about saving the planet for the future.
20:43It's about keeping it alive while we're still around to enjoy it.
21:33Beep.