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Remington Steele S01E01

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00:00I'm sorry, Mr. Steele's out of town.
00:07Mr...
00:08Ben Pearson.
00:09Telephone call for Remington Steele.
00:11Miss?
00:12Mr. Steele?
00:13You found me.
00:14Do you always do things on such a grand scale, Mr. Pearson?
00:17Only when I'm aroused.
00:18Remington Steele.
00:19May I present Special Agent Ben Pearson.
00:21Yes, it seems that someone's going around impersonating me.
00:24Cheeky blighter.
00:25That man that was with you...
00:26Yes?
00:27He isn't Remington Steele.
00:29Ladies and gentlemen, Remington Steele.
00:32You're nothing but a cut-rate con man.
00:38Try this for a deep, dark secret.
00:41The great Detective Remington Steele.
00:44He doesn't exist.
00:46I invented him.
00:48Follow.
00:50I always loved excitement.
00:52So I studied and apprenticed and put my name on an office.
00:57But absolutely nobody knocked down my door.
01:00A female private investigator seemed so... feminine.
01:04So I invented a superior.
01:06A decidedly masculine superior.
01:09Suddenly there were cases around the block.
01:12Having an imaginary boss is a dangerous way to live.
01:16But so far, it's working.
02:28Just in a little bit. That's it. Fine.
02:33One. Just hold it right there.
02:35Look at your mother. Look at your mother. That's fine.
02:39That's it. Okay. Okay.
02:57Thank you. You make a most enchanting family.
03:00For another 50, you can keep the kids.
03:03I'm afraid my suitcase isn't big enough.
03:05Bye.
03:15Didn't take him long to pick up the scent.
03:19Only this time, we saw him...
03:23before he saw us.
03:28I must say, Miss Holt, I am... less than impressed.
03:33This is not why I retained the Remington Steel Detective Agency.
03:38Thank you, gentlemen.
03:42I could have arranged this method of transportation myself.
03:46But I'm afraid I can't.
03:48I'm afraid I can't.
03:50I'm afraid I can't.
03:52I'm afraid I can't.
03:54I could have arranged this method of transportation myself.
03:59It does not take a security genius to hire an armed car service.
04:03Mr. Hunter, this is only...
04:05I've got $2.6 million worth of gems arriving tomorrow.
04:08Anybody wants to take a shot at them,
04:10all they gotta do is blow that tin can apart and run like hell.
04:14If they do, they'll come up empty.
04:17The art of security is a lot like a magic act, Mr. Hunter.
04:22It's built on deception.
04:24While everybody's looking here, the gems will be over here.
04:29So if anybody wants that box, they're welcome to it,
04:33because...
04:36this is the one that counts.
04:44Murphy will go through the service entrance
04:46with the gems neatly tucked away in a linen car.
04:50Now I'm impressed.
04:52Mr. Steele will be pleased to hear that.
04:54I'll tell him myself tomorrow.
04:56I'm afraid that's impossible. He isn't in Los Angeles at the moment.
04:59You mean he's not gonna supervise this operation personally?
05:02We explained that Mr. Steele never involves himself directly in a case.
05:06He functions best in an advisory capacity.
05:09Insurance only covers half the value of those gems.
05:12Your magic act turned sour. I'm on the hook for $1.3 million.
05:16You want to hear a little secret? I don't got $1.3 million.
05:19So I want Steele in the trenches, or I'm going somewhere else.
05:23We're sorry you feel that way, sir.
05:25We'll submit a bill for services to date.
05:28Mr. Steele will be calling in around 5.
05:31I'll discuss the situation with him, see how he wants to proceed.
05:35I'll expect an answer by 6.
05:39Ian, waiting for you. Let's get started.
05:49It's five after five.
05:51Have you heard from Mr. Steele yet?
05:54We all know the problem. Let's talk solution.
05:57Simple. Say goodbye to Mr. Hunter.
06:00Isn't that a little precipitous?
06:02Laura, we made a rule.
06:04If a client insists on dealing directly with Remington Steele, we pass.
06:08Gordon Hunter is creating a media event.
06:11Television, newspapers, People magazine, for God's sake.
06:15Whoever provides security for the gems gets kissed by the same spotlight.
06:19The publicity is worth its weight in clients.
06:22And you want Remington Steele to personally supervise security.
06:26That's right.
06:28Can I ask a dumb question?
06:30How is Remington Steele going to do that when he doesn't exist?
06:33We don't have to produce a real, live Remington Steele.
06:36Hunter just wants to know he's there.
06:39The trick is to keep our non-existent Mr. Steele involved yet inaccessible.
06:44Wherever Hunter is, he'll always be somewhere else.
06:49By the time Hunter realizes he hasn't met or even seen Remington Steele,
06:54we'll have done our job.
06:56I think we're courting disaster.
06:58Touch on the overhead.
07:00It's killing us. These offices, the rental on the furniture,
07:03not to mention the limousine and chauffeur.
07:05The reason I invented Remington Steele in the first place
07:08was to attract clients like Hunter.
07:10I'm telling you, all we have to do
07:12is manufacture his presence for a few hours
07:14and we can permanently dispense with the red ink.
07:17Hello? Anyone about?
07:21Mr. Steele.
07:23I'm sorry, Mr. Steele's out of town.
07:25I'm his associate, Murphy Michaels.
07:28Have we met before?
07:30I don't think so.
07:31Odd. You look vaguely familiar.
07:33I've got that kind of face.
07:35So you do.
07:36Laura Holt.
07:37Bernice Fox.
07:39Quite a busy office with so many circuitries.
07:42I'm a licensed private eye.
07:44I'm a licensed private eye.
07:46Quite a busy office with so many circuitries.
07:49I'm a licensed private investigator, Mr...?
07:52Pearson. Ben Pearson.
07:54Special agent.
07:56If I want to have a better title,
07:58I represent the South African government.
08:00Sorry to barge in unannounced,
08:02but I thought it best not to make a formal appointment.
08:04Would you like some coffee? I'll make a fresh pie.
08:07Or tea, perhaps?
08:10I'll make some fresh water.
08:16I'm here on a rather delicate mission.
08:18I need your assistance.
08:20Those gems you're guarding?
08:21What about them?
08:22They're stolen.
08:24They were smuggled out of South Africa,
08:26quite illegally,
08:27and eventually sold to a private museum in Rome.
08:30From there, they were lent to museums in Paris and London.
08:33Now they're here on some sort of promotional tour in the States.
08:36Naturally, my government wants them returned.
08:38That's a legal matter.
08:40Why come to us?
08:42Ownership is currently tied up in litigation.
08:44But if the gems should be stolen now,
08:46it won't matter who they legally belong to.
08:48You think there'll be an attempt?
08:50They are the rarest gems in the world.
08:52Royal Labulite.
08:54More precious than diamonds because there's so few of them.
08:57The only known deposits reside in my country.
09:00Yes, Miss Holder.
09:02I think there will be an attempt.
09:04That's why I'll need to be fully apprised of your security measures.
09:08You don't mind if we check you out first?
09:11Not at all.
09:12Quite frankly, I would be rather disappointed if you didn't.
09:15It would demonstrate a certain laxity on your behalf
09:18which would not be very reassuring to my government.
09:21Then we'll see you again, Mr. Pearson.
09:24Count on it, Miss Holder.
09:32Delightful aroma.
09:34Anybody know what time it is in South Africa?
10:05Oh!
10:11Who are you?
10:13Just a happy-go-lucky tourist out to see a bit of the world.
10:16That way I got five passports from five different countries
10:19in five different names.
10:21Keep trying for a good picture.
10:23Those gems belong to us.
10:25I was under the impression that they belonged to the South African government.
10:28We have a proprietary claim.
10:30After all, the courier who smuggled them out of the country initially worked for us.
10:34Only he got greedy and sold them on his own.
10:37He's been properly chastised for his indiscretion.
10:42May I get up now, or do you prefer me in the groveling position?
10:51Each time we try to reclaim those stones, you get in our way.
10:55First Paris, then London.
10:57Here you are again.
10:59Perhaps we have the same travel agent.
11:01I'm hungry. Let's kill him and get something to eat.
11:04That won't satisfy anything but your appetite.
11:07I'll admit we've been at cross-purposes up to now,
11:10but I think it's time we joined forces.
11:12Why?
11:14It certainly beats the alternative.
11:20Keep in touch.
11:29Mr. Hunter.
11:31You're late.
11:33You can afford to be when you bring good news.
11:36He'll be here.
11:38Mr. Steele feels your situation warrants his closest attention.
11:43He'll be arriving late tonight.
11:47Well, what do you think?
11:49It seems very adventurous,
11:51building an automobile the way the industry is these days.
11:55You ever have a dream, Miss Holt?
11:57To see your talents recognized, your efforts applauded?
12:01Yes.
12:03Ever since I started on the assembly line welding door panels,
12:06I dreamed of having my name on the finest automobile ever built.
12:10I went to engineering school at night.
12:12I even took speech lessons so people would listen to what I had to say
12:16instead of how I said it.
12:18Averaged 3 hours of sleep a night for 6 years
12:20until I was running a division of my own.
12:22I've mortgaged everything but my vital parts to get this beauty launched.
12:26This may be just another job to you, but it's my life.
12:29I assure you, Mr. Hunter,
12:31in my own way, I am also risking everything I have.
12:35Good.
12:37I never like doing business with someone who doesn't have as much to lose as I do.
12:56Dr. Livingstone, I presume.
13:27I didn't order this.
13:29Oh, the gentleman wishes to buy you a drink.
13:33Tell the gentleman that I appreciate the gesture,
13:35but I'm waiting for someone.
13:43A magnum of champagne?
13:45You look thirsty.
13:47Do you always do things on such a grand scale, Mr. Pearson?
13:50Only when I'm hungry.
13:52Do you always do things on such a grand scale, Mr. Pearson?
13:55Only when I'm aroused.
13:57With curiosity.
13:59May I?
14:09Tell me, Miss Holt, how did you become a dick?
14:13I beg your pardon?
14:15Isn't that what you Americans call a private detective?
14:17Only in the movies.
14:20I always loved excitement.
14:22So I studied and apprenticed
14:24and eventually joined a large detective agency.
14:27And did it fulfill your fantasies?
14:29The work was rewarding.
14:31The recognition was nil.
14:33It seemed no matter how successful my efforts were,
14:36the lion's share of the credit always went to my male counterparts,
14:39regardless of their contribution.
14:41Tawdry thing, this male chauvinism.
14:43You exhibited a little of it yourself.
14:45Oh, how so?
14:47When you instantly assumed I was a secretary.
14:50You must admit your occupation is highly unusual for a woman.
14:53Especially one of such obvious breeding and intelligence.
14:57You carry the same prejudice most people do because of my sex.
15:00You think I'm not built for the job.
15:02Mm. It's a rather rough and tumble trade.
15:05At least the way it's portrayed in your cinema.
15:07All those blazing guns and smashing fists.
15:11Believe me, it requires more brain than brawn.
15:14I take it sex isn't a problem for Remington Steele?
15:17Yours, that is.
15:19On the contrary.
15:21He's the most generous, understanding, supportive man I could imagine.
15:26He seems to have rather large shoes to fill.
15:29Few would be foolish enough to try.
15:33Unless, of course, one enjoyed impossible challenges.
15:37Will he be involved tomorrow?
15:40Mr Steele's presence will be felt rather than seen.
15:44And his associate?
15:46Murphy Michaels.
15:48I certainly hope he's involved in the thick of things.
15:50Seems an awfully competent chap.
15:52Oh, he'll play a vital role.
15:56Tomorrow, then.
15:58May everything go smoothly.
16:03Tomorrow, then.
16:05May everything go as smoothly as I hope.
16:11Excuse me.
16:15Thanks for the champagne.
16:18And the curiosity.
16:26Murphy.
16:28Reserve the penthouse suite in Remington Steele's name.
16:31Take the bags up, arrange the clothes, and hang out the do-not-disturb.
16:34I hate this, Laura. I really hate it.
16:36Don't fight it.
16:41Very clever.
16:43Getting on team with Steele's associate.
16:46Simply sowing seeds, gentlemen.
16:48And when can we expect the harvest?
16:51Tonight. She's going to show me the route the gems will take.
16:54Naturally, you're going to share that little tidbit with your new associates.
16:57I want you to follow the script.
16:59Of course, if you're not interested, gentlemen...
17:02I'll make the trip alone.
17:04Excuse me.
17:17Take my car. Blue Mercedes.
17:19For God's sake, don't lose us.
17:22Miss Holt!
17:24I wonder if I might impose on you for a lift, Miss Holt.
17:28Certainly.
17:46Flush.
17:48Mr. Steele graciously allows me to use it whenever he's away.
17:52Mr. Steele sounds too good to be true.
17:56Where can I drop you?
17:58Wherever there's an abundance of police cars.
18:00Are you in some kind of trouble?
18:02Depends on how quickly we can locate one.
18:05Cut across to Sunset?
18:10Do you pack a rod, Miss Holt?
18:14You've seen too many movies, Mr. Pearson.
18:16No, I don't pack a rod.
18:18I've never found the need for one.
18:20Pity.
18:22Why?
18:23The courier who smuggled those gems out of South Africa?
18:26What about it?
18:28It was brutally murdered by the two gentlemen behind us in the blue Mercedes.
18:31May I use your phone? It's a local call.
18:39Mobile operator?
18:41This is T7328. I'd like the police.
18:46Yes, it's definitely an emergency.
18:48Why are they following us?
18:50I'd like to report a stolen vehicle.
18:52Blue Mercedes 380SL. License number?
18:571-D-R-O-3-7-3.
19:01The last time I saw it, it was traveling...
19:03East on Sunset, just past Doheny.
19:05East on Sunset, just past Doheny.
19:07Please hurry. I had some medicine in the backseat for my grandmother.
19:10If she doesn't receive it...
19:12Bless you.
19:15Everyone needs a little added incentive now and then.
19:23In light of this disturbing development, I suggest we change strategy.
19:27In what way?
19:29Use a decoy.
19:31Then slip the gems in where no one's looking.
19:34You're very good at this sort of thing, Mr. Peterson.
19:37Have I read your mind, Miss Holt?
19:40Let's just say it's...
19:42Let's just say it's been considered.
19:44So are you.
19:46What?
19:48Very good at this sort of thing.
19:59Rather reaffirms one's faith in the local constabulary.
20:02Good afternoon.
20:11You're cutting it a little close, aren't you?
20:14I had the most incredible evening.
20:16Yeah? With who? Him?
20:20I want to hear all the gory details.
20:22First, he bought me a bottle of champagne.
20:24Who bought you champagne?
20:26Actually, it was a magnate.
20:28I thought you didn't like champagne.
20:30We went for a drive, and that's when things really got hairy.
20:33Who went for a drive?
20:35Laura and Special Agent Ben Pearson.
20:38You enjoy riding with a guy who could be an international jewel thief
20:42or, for all we know, a mass murderer?
20:44That's not like you, Laura.
20:46Didn't he check out?
20:49Yeah, he checked out.
20:51I talked to his supervisor this morning.
20:53The only bump is, Pearson wasn't supposed to arrive until today.
20:56So just to be sure, I requested a wire photo.
20:59Where are the bullets?
21:01What are you doing?
21:03This isn't going to be the piece of cake we thought it would be.
21:06The men who originally stole those gems are brutal murderers.
21:09They followed us last night,
21:11even though Ben took care of them brilliantly.
21:13Ben?
21:15I'd feel better if you packed a rod.
21:17A rod?
21:19Paige Remington Steele in exactly 27 minutes,
21:21just to keep his presence alive.
21:23I'll tell Hunter that Mr. Steele already left for the airport.
21:26Good luck.
21:28Sounds like he got a lot for his lousy bottle of champagne.
21:31It was a magnum.
21:46What a relief, gentlemen.
21:48I thought you'd never get here in time.
21:50Wonderful thing about Los Angeles.
21:52It has 24-hour bail bond service.
21:55I told you, we should have killed him straight away.
21:57It's very difficult to maintain a relationship
21:59built solely on mistrust, gentlemen.
22:01Remington Steele.
22:02To the elevator.
22:03Remington Steele.
22:04Dear boy.
22:05Telephone call for Remington Steele.
22:07Miss?
22:08Mr. Steele?
22:09You found me.
22:10This way, Mr. Steele.
22:11There you are, sir.
22:14Oh!
22:15Steele here.
22:16Who?
22:17Where?
22:18Car talk now, Miss...
22:20Wolf?
22:21Fox.
22:22I knew it was some sort of primitive creature.
22:25Sorry, but I've literally got to run.
22:27Mr. Steele.
22:30I certainly feel safer with you here.
22:32My sentiments precisely.
22:34Come with me.
22:35There's someone I want you to meet in the security office.
22:37Security office?
22:38Sounds very secure.
22:40You know, somehow I thought you'd be older.
22:42Oh, like an agent in mind.
22:56Remington Steele.
22:58May I present Special Agent Ben Pearson of South Africa.
23:02Mr. Steele.
23:03A pleasure, sir.
23:05I've heard a great deal about you.
23:07And your name has preceded you, Mr. Pearson.
23:10Mr. Pearson's here to assist you in protecting the gems.
23:13Ah.
23:14That's a piece of good fortune I hadn't anticipated.
23:16I assume you're aware of Raymond Kessler and Leo Neif?
23:19The gentlemen who murdered the courier.
23:21Yes, they've made an indelible impression.
23:23Well, at least they're a known quantity.
23:25But I am afraid there is a bit of a hiccup in all this.
23:28Oh?
23:29Yes, it seems that someone's going around impersonating me.
23:31Cheeky blighter.
23:33He did it in Paris and then again in London.
23:35You wouldn't by any chance have a description of this impostor?
23:39My bill, General Coloring.
23:41Could be anyone.
23:43Including me.
23:47Mr. Steele, how can I be of service?
23:50You could detain Messrs. Kessler and Neif.
23:52I believe they're in the hotel now.
23:54Would that help you accomplish your objectives?
23:57That would go a long way.
23:59Done.
24:01Then could we get on with it?
24:09Miss Hall.
24:11I just spoke with Mr. Steele.
24:13So did I.
24:14He's already left.
24:15He just arrived.
24:16Mr. Steele just arrived?
24:19Yes.
24:20There he is with Special Agent Ben Pearson.
24:28Hmm.
24:29Something wrong, old chap?
24:31Ah, stomach's a bit queasy.
24:33Wouldn't doubt it.
24:34Be a little gassy as myself,
24:36protecting over two million in rare germs.
24:39But not to worry.
24:41Just remember I'll be watching you every step of the way.
24:51You have less than 20 minutes to get to the airport.
24:54Yes.
24:55Shall we?
24:57Oh, why not?
25:02That man that was with you...
25:04Yes?
25:05He isn't Remington Steele.
25:07He isn't?
25:08He's an imposter.
25:09He is?
25:10But don't say anything.
25:12You can count on me.
25:20Why don't you cop on ahead, Miss Hall,
25:22and I'll stay behind to wreck a noise in the area
25:24just in case...
25:25Nonsense.
25:26I want you both at the airport.
25:40What did he say?
25:41He wants us both at the airport.
25:43No, I mean that phony Steele.
25:45Oh, not much, actually.
25:46We were merely introduced.
25:48He's obviously after those gems.
25:51Why didn't Gordon Hunter blow the whistle on him?
25:54Well, he's never actually met Mr. Steele.
25:56You see, Mr. Steele was out of town
25:58when they accepted this assignment.
26:00But surely our charlatan realizes he'll be exposed
26:02once the real Steele comes upon the scene.
26:05When do you expect him?
26:07That's difficult to pinpoint.
26:10But you did say he'd be involved in this undertaking.
26:12Yes, yes, extremely involved.
26:15But unseen.
26:17This is awfully tricky, Mr. Pearson.
26:19So it appears.
26:21No pun intended.
26:23You mustn't tell Hunter.
26:25It would only undermine his confidence
26:27in the entire operation.
26:30How long do you think we can keep this charade going?
26:33Just until the gems are delivered safely.
26:36And then you'll nail this ersatz Remington Steele?
26:39To the wall, Mr. Pearson, to the very wall.
26:42Graphically put.
26:44Can I count on your cooperation?
26:46Oh, believe me, Mom's the operative word here.
26:49Thank you. Thank you so much.
26:51You're the only one that I can turn to.
26:53Oh, there, there, Miss Holt.
26:55As long as you trust me,
26:57there's nothing left to worry about.
27:17Mr. Pearson?
27:19Yes, of course.
27:46Come on.
28:13Mr. Steele.
28:16I admit, I was somewhat skeptical.
28:18Your Miss Holt certainly protects you.
28:21Well, that's part of her function.
28:22Yes, but this was bordering on the ridiculous.
28:24I mean, I couldn't see you, talk to you,
28:26not even on the telephone.
28:27You were either unavailable or out of town.
28:30I was beginning to think you didn't exist.
28:31Ha, ha, ha, ha.
28:42What is this fetish you have for secrecy?
28:44Anonymity is an asset in my profession.
28:46Yes, but, I mean, no photographs, no interviews,
28:50never involving yourself directly in a case.
28:52It wasn't only mine.
28:53I spoke with several people who dealt with your agency
28:56and it was the same story.
28:57Plenty of Miss Holt. None of you.
28:59Well, now you have a great deal of me.
29:02Who knows, when this is over, you may
29:04rue the day you ever met me.
29:15Mm, I seem to have left my key at the desk.
29:19Eh, would you let Mr. Steele into his room?
29:21He seems to have forgotten his keys.
29:24So I'll look for you tonight.
29:25Tonight?
29:26Yes, for the formal unveiling of the Hunter Jet Star 6000.
29:31And, of course, the gems.
29:32Of course.
29:33Wouldn't miss it for the world.
29:34Yes, sir.
29:35Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:36Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:37Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:38Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:39Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:40Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:41Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:42Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:43Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:44Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:45Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:46Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:47Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:48Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:49Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:50Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:51Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:52Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:53Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:54Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:55Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:56Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:57Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:58Thank you, Mr. Steele.
29:59Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:00Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:01Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:02Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:03Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:04Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:05Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:06Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:07Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:08Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:09Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:10Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:11Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:12Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:13Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:14Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:15Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:16Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:17Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:18Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:19Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:20Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:21Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:22Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:23Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:24Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:25Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:26Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:27Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:28Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:29Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:30Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:31Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:32Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:33Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:34Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:35Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:36Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:37Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:38Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:39Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:40Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:41Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:42Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:43Thank you, Mr. Steele.
30:44Thank you, Mr. Steele.
31:11Nice to meet you, Mr. Steele.
31:18A sign of him?
31:20No.
31:22Where do you suppose our imposter is?
31:24I keep asking myself the same question.
31:31Ladies and gentlemen, can we take our seats, please?
31:33We've got an awful lot to accomplish this evening,
31:35not the least of which is the unveiling
31:37of the finest automobile ever engineered by man.
31:41But before we knock your socks off
31:44with the Hunter Jetstar 6000,
31:46I'd like to take a moment
31:48to thank the Remington Steele Detective Agency.
31:51Great endorsement.
31:53Transporting and protecting the most precious gems in the world
31:57requires brilliant planning, daring execution,
32:01and plain old street savvy.
32:03So, without further ado,
32:05let me introduce to you the person
32:07responsible for the safety of the Royal Abulight.
32:10Oh, this is so embarrassing. I wish he'd stop.
32:12Wait.
32:14An absolutely astounding human being.
32:16Ladies and gentlemen, Remington Steele.
32:19Years from now, when you talk of this, and you will,
32:23be kind,
32:25Deborah Carr to John Kerr,
32:27Tea and Sympathy, MGM, 1956.
32:38Thank you. You're most generous with your applause.
32:41But it would be unworthy of Remington Steele
32:44if he didn't sing aloud his most able
32:47and most valued associate,
32:49truly the woman behind the man,
32:52Miss Laura Holt.
32:54Please, Miss Holt, stand up and take a well-deserved bow.
32:59Please, Miss Holt, stand up and take a well-deserved bow.
33:09And now you have far more interesting things to look at than me,
33:13so please, Mr. Hunter, show us your creation.
33:16Thank you very much.
33:18Without any further pause, I'd like to introduce to you
33:21the Hunter Jetstar 6000.
33:29You!
33:31I didn't know you was going to do that. My sincere apologies.
33:34What are you going to do when Mr. Steele arrives?
33:37I'd like to meet the man whose shoes I may tempt into filth.
33:40How am I doing so far?
33:42Atrociously. You're not a thing like Mr. Steele.
33:45He's honest, dedicated, better-looking,
33:48while you're not a thing like me.
33:50You're not a thing like me.
33:52You're not a thing like me.
33:54You're not a thing like me.
33:56Better-looking, while you're nothing but a treacherous liar,
33:59a cheap crook, a cut-rate con man!
34:04What are you doing? Let go of me!
34:06Whatever possessed you to think you could get away with this?
34:16A delectable man you are, Mr. Steele.
34:18Do you know there's not a piece of lint, a speck of dandruff,
34:21a hank of hair on any of his suits?
34:24He obviously wears a shirt once and then discards it,
34:27since there's no laundry marks to be found.
34:29Same with the shoes.
34:31The soles seem never to have touched the ground.
34:33Not one single solitary scuff mark.
34:37He's fastidious, almost to a fault.
34:40Fault, too? Of course not!
34:42Then he's blessed.
34:44I'm forever plucking stray hairs from my comb and brush,
34:47positively demoralizing,
34:49but an inescapable part of the human condition.
34:53Hmph!
34:55Does any of this say anything to you, Miss Holt?
34:59It does to me.
35:01It fairly shouts,
35:03Remington Steele is an elaborate bruise.
35:05He does not exist. You've invented him.
35:09What are you going to do with this absurd supposition?
35:14Nothing.
35:16Believe me, Laura, I didn't plan on assuming Remington Steele's identity.
35:20I'm after something entirely different.
35:23The gem, you say?
35:25Mm-mm. The courier, the one who was murdered.
35:28He was my younger brother.
35:30I'm here to see that Kessler and Neff pay for his death.
35:35I don't know whether to believe you or not.
35:38That's understandable.
35:40The moment they're apprehended, I shall be gone.
35:44And your secret shall leave with me.
35:51Excuse me.
35:56That guy's a fake.
35:58I told you, Laura, I warned you about him.
36:00I know. I know.
36:02This is the special agent from South Africa.
36:06What do we know about the courier who was murdered?
36:09Let's see. His name is Otto Detmer. He was born in Johannesburg.
36:12How old is he, huh?
36:1463 or 64, I think.
36:16Keep an eye on him.
36:18Come on.
36:24He certainly gets around.
36:28Douglas Quintain, England.
36:31Michael O'Leary, Ireland.
36:34Paul Fabrini, Italy.
36:37John Murrell, France.
36:40Richard Blaine, Australia.
36:42Wait a minute. Run through those names again.
36:45Blaine.
36:47Murrell.
36:49Fabrini.
36:51O'Leary Quintain.
36:53I don't believe it.
36:55He doesn't look like a Fabrini.
36:57Each of those names is from a character Humphrey Bogart played in the movies.
37:03We know one thing.
37:05What?
37:07He likes Humphrey Bogart.
37:16What?
37:18Well, now we know something else.
37:20What?
37:22He's a murderer.
37:25What are you doing?
37:27I'm calling the police.
37:29No!
37:31The guy's dangerous.
37:33Ask Ben Pearson just how dangerous.
37:35I want the agency to bring him in.
37:37It's the only way we can come out even on this fiasco.
37:40Besides, he's a murderer.
37:43Besides, he's made the whole thing very personal.
37:49He's not gonna stick around after this.
37:51He wants those gems.
37:53He won't leave until he's taken a shot at them.
37:55Laura, I hope it's only the agency you're trying to protect.
38:01It's the only thing I'm interested in, Murphy.
38:06Okay.
38:14Mr. Hunter.
38:16Welcome to the party.
38:18Pull up an empty promise and sit down.
38:21There may be an attempt to steal the gems.
38:24Possibly tonight.
38:26The way my luck's running, it'll succeed.
38:29We know who the potential thief is.
38:32We're doing everything we can to locate him.
38:36They ate my food, they drank my booze, but they didn't kill me.
38:40I ate my food, they drank my booze, but they didn't buy my car.
38:47I'm sorry.
38:49I completely retooled an abandoned tire factory in Toledo,
38:53hired 800 people to turn out a car nobody wants.
38:58Let me tell you, Miss Holt.
39:02Dreams aren't all they're cracked up to be.
39:06No, Mr. Hunter.
39:11Sometimes they aren't.
39:34Miss Holt, what a welcome surprise.
39:40How did you know where to find me?
39:43Since you seem to have acquired a taste for masquerading as Remington Steele,
39:47it was a logical place to look.
39:50Your brother, the courier.
39:52Devastating loss.
39:54He was 63 years old.
39:56My older brother.
39:58Laura, get it over with and turn him in.
40:00No need for that. I'll confess.
40:03I'll admit your intuition was correct. I am here for the gems.
40:06But not for myself.
40:08I intend to return them to their rightful owner, the South African government.
40:11By stealing them?
40:13From the people who stole them.
40:15I think that's just a technicality. You're a thief.
40:17Kessler and Neef are thieves. I'm an artist.
40:19You're a murderer.
40:21Ben Pearson, the real Ben Pearson, is hanging from a coat hook in your room.
40:30That was filthy.
40:32Who?
40:35Kessler and his ape, Neef.
40:37He was killed with a knife, wasn't he?
40:39Blade about six inches long, an incision and upward thrust just below the third vertebrae.
40:42Hell of an accurate description for an innocent man.
40:47I've been chasing those two animals halfway across Europe.
40:49Believe me, I'm familiar with their work.
40:51If you want them, you'll have to move fast.
40:53They'll go for the gems tonight.
40:55What makes you so certain?
40:57I would.
41:00You still intend to?
41:02Thought has crossed my mind.
41:04Then I'd have to stop you.
41:06You could.
41:08Easy. I'd call the police.
41:10Why haven't you already? Why aren't they here now?
41:12Because you don't believe I killed Ben Pearson.
41:14I do.
41:16You don't count. This is between Miss Holt and myself.
41:20Do you, Laura?
41:23I don't know.
41:25Don't waste time agonizing.
41:27Tell me, what would Remington Steel do in this situation?
41:29Call the police.
41:31Then call them.
41:36Where are you going?
41:38I've been avoiding those two gentlemen all evening.
41:40I think it's time they found me.
41:42Hope you're not squeamish, Murphy.
41:44Better on you.
41:46Good. Then you won't mind bringing Pearson's body up here.
41:56I tried his room. There's no answer.
41:58Perhaps you could page him in the lobby. Thank you.
42:06Remington Steel. Telephone call for Remington Steel.
42:09Remington Steel. Telephone call.
42:11Here.
42:13Sorry, sir.
42:18Here you are, Mr. Steel.
42:20Steel here.
42:23We've been looking for you, Mr. Steel.
42:25There's no avoiding good friends, is there?
42:27This time, we brought our own transportation.
42:31I'd wager you'd have an easier time cracking us safe
42:33if you had the specifications.
42:35Where would we get them?
42:37From Remington Steel.
42:39After all, he's the one that's providing security for the Germans.
42:42Shall we?
42:52Where are they?
43:00Holy!
43:02We left him in his room.
43:04So you did, gentlemen.
43:13I think a laboratory will find this to be the murder instrument.
43:18Who are you?
43:20Are you kidding? He's Remington Steel.
43:22You're as good as they say you are.
43:24The Remington Steel agency is far more than one man, officer.
43:27On their behalf, I thank you.
43:35You'll be all right?
43:47Well?
43:51Well.
43:55I'm afraid it's time to leave your lovely city.
44:00I'm sorry.
44:03Where will you go?
44:07Wherever the Germans travel next.
44:10San Francisco, I believe.
44:15I give you my word.
44:18I won't try to liberate the Germans
44:20until they're safely out of your jurisdiction.
44:25All things considered,
44:27you made a delightful Remington Steel.
44:30The press of other commitments wasn't so severe.
44:34I might relish the role on a permanent basis.
44:40After all,
44:42I'm a man who enjoys impossible challenges.
45:00Good-bye.
45:31Laura?
45:35Somebody blindsided me.
45:38You lied to me.
45:40A treacherous thief lied to me!
45:56No, don't worry.
46:00I'll get him.
46:07I was very encouraged by last night's show.
46:09Stop that man! He's a thief!
46:19You didn't steal the gems?
46:21Laura, I gave you my word. They're fair game now.
46:23Oh, no, they're not!
46:30Oh, no!
46:56Hold it steady!
46:59They're so heavy!
47:11I take it you wanted to drive.
47:16Remington Steel, an unidentified woman.
47:19That's you.
47:21Rescue Rare Gems.
47:23Poor Mr. Hunter.
47:25He wasn't a thief.
47:27Just a man who saw his dream going down in a sea of red ink.
47:31He wanted to use the gems to finance production of his automobile.
47:38Good morning.
47:40Lester Giddens. I have a 9 o'clock with Remington Steel.
47:43Oh, I'm afraid Mr. Steel was called away on urgent business.
47:48In San Francisco.
47:50But I can use his office.
47:57If anyone should call...
48:00He won't.
48:09Mr. Steel, I thought you were in San Francisco.
48:17I was.
48:19But suddenly there was nothing for me to do up there.
48:27So, how can I help you?
48:57© BF-WATCH TV 2021