Into the small law offices of unlucky-in-love Charlotte St. John stumbles a handsome stranger, bloodied and battered, suffering amnesia. The good Samaritan, she cares for him HD ( Comedy, Drama, Myst
Into the small law offices of unlucky-in-love Charlotte St. John stumbles a handsome stranger, bloodied and battered, suffering amnesia. The good Samaritan, she cares for him HD ( Comedy, Drama, Myst
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Oh, God.
00:02Oh, God, no.
00:04Oh, God, no.
00:10Perfect.
00:30What's going on?
00:52Oh, God, no.
01:20Get out of here!
01:22Get out of here!
01:24Run!
01:26Run!
01:28Run!
01:30Run!
01:32Run!
01:34Get off me!
01:36Get off me!
01:38Oh, God!
01:40Oh, God!
01:42Oh, God!
01:46Deceitful, conniving, cowardly, you go girl.
01:50I mean, it was like a bad joke.
01:53How long did I date Roger?
01:54Oh, six months.
01:56Seven and a half.
01:58Then he dumps me for some trashy secretary
02:00he met, what, like three weeks ago?
02:02Scummy, cheating, deceitful, conniving.
02:06You said that already, but it sounded good.
02:08Say it again.
02:09Scummy, cheating, deceitful, conniving.
02:14Scummy, cheating, deceitful, conniving.
02:33Look Gwen, how stupid am I?
02:35Come on, come on, no, no, no.
02:36Don't start with that again.
02:37No, seriously, why am I always the one getting dumped?
02:40Roger, before that Taylor, before that Peter,
02:44Taylor the first time.
02:46Hey, men are pigs.
02:47Don't blame yourself for their pigliness.
02:49Their piggishment?
02:51And I'm always totally surprised.
02:54Every time, what is wrong with me?
03:01Charlie, you need two things.
03:03Yeah, what's that?
03:04Well first you need a total serious attitude adjustment,
03:07a whole new outlook.
03:09You change your head and you change your life.
03:11Change my head, then what?
03:13Well then you need a quart of Häagen-Dazs chocolate ice cream.
03:23So it's all in my head.
03:24That's right, all in your head.
03:26Just think positive and I can do anything.
03:28Yep, visualize, verbalize, vitalize.
03:31Goodbye to the old me.
03:33Hell, this is stupid.
03:35Oh, come on now.
03:37Okay, new me, new attitude.
03:39That's right.
03:40Watch out, honey.
03:41Don't dream it, be it.
03:43Let me have it.
03:44I fix me on the inside.
03:45Come on, bring it home.
03:47And good things will just fall into my lap.
04:08I'll get that tattoo.
04:19Big bump.
04:21What? I'm sorry?
04:23I say big bump, on the head, big bump.
04:26Oh, oh, big bump, on the head.
04:28Very big.
04:30Is he going to be all right?
04:32Multiple contusion, hairline fracture of the skull.
04:36Physically, your friend will be fine.
04:38Oh, he's not my...
04:39We just met...
04:41Physically?
04:43Oh, here he come.
04:44Perhaps you try.
04:53Hi.
04:54Hello.
04:56Are you a nurse?
04:57Oh, no, no.
04:58I actually, um, I'm the...
05:00I found you.
05:02Or rather, you found me.
05:04Really? That's nice.
05:05Was I lost?
05:09Oh, um, I'm Charlotte St. John.
05:12Hello, Charlotte St. John, finder of lost men.
05:15I'm...
05:20I'm...
05:25I don't know my name.
05:28I don't get it, doctor. He can still speak.
05:31Ah, but not all memory is stored in the same region of the brain.
05:35If he were injured elsewhere,
05:37he might have remembered his life experiences,
05:39but completely lost his ability to talk.
05:41The brain is still quite a mystery, truth be told.
05:44In fact, there was one time, this case,
05:47at the University of Punjabi, where there was this code...
05:50Excuse me, doctor, but how much memory has he actually lost?
05:54Ah, well, based on the cerebral angiography,
05:57the TBI seems to have caused stage four retrograde dissociative amnesia.
06:01Um...
06:03Sorry.
06:05With the exception of some early childhood memories, all of it.
06:09But most amnesiacs regain some, if not all of their memory, eventually.
06:15Wow.
06:16I know it sucks.
06:18Is... is his family coming back?
06:21Is... is his family coming to get him?
06:24No, that is the real bummer.
06:26He's got no ID, no business cards, no driver's license,
06:29so we have no one to call.
06:31Police even ran his fingerprints. Nada. He's a real nowhere man.
06:35So what happens to him?
06:37We release him. What else?
06:39The police can check missing persons, maybe.
06:41Social services will give him a list of hostels, but he's got no money.
06:45We're a hospital, not a hotel.
06:47Hi, Charlotte St. John.
06:49You'll join the homeless population with the deranged and the addicts.
06:53Unless you've got a better idea.
07:01Attitude.
07:12I don't know about this.
07:14What's to know? You need a place to stay. I got a spare room.
07:17Yeah, but you've done so much already.
07:19Please, I haven't done anything.
07:21Besides, it's just for a few days until we sort you out.
07:24Okay?
07:25Okay.
07:29I'm sorry.
07:32Here, why don't you put your hand on my shoulder?
07:35Okay.
07:43Right. Oh, okay.
07:44Just take it slow.
07:47Sorry about this.
07:49Bathroom's there. Kitchen's right through there.
07:53I'm gonna go to the market, pick up a few things.
07:55Toothbrush, shaving cream, toothpaste.
07:58Any particular brand you like?
08:00Not that I can think of.
08:02Nice house. Room for a whole family.
08:05Yeah, I grew up here.
08:07Inherited it from my parents.
08:09I should probably get rid of it. The mortgage is killing me, but...
08:12I just can't seem to let go, I guess.
08:14Anyway...
08:17Television remote.
08:20Telephone's right there.
08:22I'll be back before six, so in the meantime, you just rest.
08:25Oh!
08:27I need to take two of these pills with water before three.
08:30Do you think you can remember that, stranger?
08:33Yeah, I think so.
08:34Hey, you can't keep calling me stranger, you know.
08:37Well, I guess we're gonna have to find a name for you.
08:41Why are you doing this?
08:43I'm hoping that you'll turn out to be a billionaire prince
08:46and reward me with my very own castle in Spain.
08:49Done. If I'm a billionaire prince, it's yours.
08:53Thank you, Charlotte St. John.
08:56You're welcome, Your Highness.
09:00All right, so just let me get this straight.
09:03You invited him right into your house?
09:06They fingerprinted him and he's clean.
09:08Besides, they were gonna kick him out into the street.
09:10Charlotte, what were you thinking about?
09:12A total stranger, a complete unknown.
09:14You're the one that told me to change my life.
09:16What happened to good things falling into my lap?
09:18Yes, but not for a serial killer in your own house.
09:20Not a serial killer.
09:22You don't know that.
09:23Shh!
09:24Charlotte, you don't know that. You listen to me.
09:26You gotta get rid of this man tonight.
09:28Shh!
09:29Charlotte!
09:33Oh, my.
09:35Look at this place.
09:38Oh.
09:42Charlotte.
09:43Hi.
09:45The place, it looks amazing.
09:49I just felt it was the least I could do.
09:51I mean, you've been so great.
09:53Gwen, this is the man I was telling you about.
09:55Strange man, this is my friend Gwen.
09:58Hi, pleased to meet me.
10:00You.
10:01Pleased to meet you, too.
10:03Are you staying for dinner tonight?
10:05No, I got a date.
10:07Oh, too bad.
10:08Oh, Charlotte, um, I borrowed a T-shirt.
10:10I hope that's okay.
10:11I think mine got ripped.
10:12Oh, sure, it's no problem.
10:14Oh, here, here, let me take those.
10:16Oh, no, no, you're still recovering.
10:18Oh, no, you gotta work it to get stronger, right?
10:25If you let that man out of his house, I'll kill you.
10:29I'll kill you.
10:34Okay, how about this one?
10:36Your uncle?
10:38Don't I wish.
10:39That's Bill Gates, computer gazillionaire.
10:44Okay, what about him?
10:47That's George W.
10:49Totally clueless.
10:51So is he.
10:53Okay, you gotta get this one.
10:55Did she win something?
10:57That's Oprah Winfrey,
10:59the greatest living voice of modern women.
11:02I will brainwash you until she becomes
11:04the most important person in your life.
11:06It's impossible, because you're the most important person in my life.
11:09It doesn't count.
11:11I'm the only person in your life.
11:13But you are my creation.
11:15I will mold you into the perfect...
11:17Oh, my God.
11:18What?
11:19Oh.
11:20You're bleeding.
11:23Ow.
11:24Oh, sorry.
11:26Does that hurt?
11:27No, no, not really.
11:29Oh.
11:31My dad always wanted me to go to medical school,
11:34but I really hate the sight of blood.
11:37So you went to law school instead.
11:39Well, my father was a lawyer.
11:41I always thought it would be kind of neat to work with him.
11:44Well, you have a promising career in nursing,
11:46I can tell you that.
11:48You think so?
11:49Absolutely.
11:50Thanks again.
11:51Hey, that castle in Spain better come with a pool.
11:55There.
11:57What about your pictures?
11:59Me?
12:00Yeah.
12:01Oh, you mean pictures from my life?
12:02Sure.
12:05That's my grandfather and Nan Nan,
12:08and those little guys are my cousins.
12:10They're triplets.
12:11Wow, you're so lucky.
12:12Everybody's so beautiful.
12:13Look at those smiles.
12:14I mean, those are real smiles.
12:16It's not a fake smile.
12:18Who's that?
12:19That's my mom.
12:21She died when I was six.
12:23Oh, I'm sorry.
12:24It's all right.
12:25I don't really remember her.
12:26Yeah, but six, that's so sad.
12:29Maybe we're lucky to forget things sometimes.
12:32What do you remember about her?
12:34Really not all that much.
12:36Speaking of pictures,
12:38we've got to go find your life.
12:40Am I right?
12:42All right, no fake smiles.
12:46All right, no fake smiles.
12:57Excuse me.
12:58Is this the police station?
13:00No, this is City Hall.
13:01The police station's on the second floor.
13:03Well, it says to come here if you know this man.
13:05Yeah? Who's that?
13:06Him.
13:07Oh, yeah.
13:09Excuse me.
13:11Do you know this man?
13:12No, not at all, but he saved my life.
13:20Scared, I was scared out of my mind.
13:24I think I'm still scared now.
13:27Ladies and gentlemen,
13:29we have a true hero in our midst,
13:32gallant and unselfish.
13:34This young man represents the values
13:37that this community needs
13:39and that this administration stands for.
13:43Proud of you, son.
13:47Is there anything you'd like to say
13:48to your rescuer, Ms. Truman?
13:50Just, I guess, thank you.
13:54Thank you for risking your life
13:56to save mine and my baby's.
13:58You're more than a hero.
14:00You're like your picture.
14:02You're an angel.
14:04The archangel Gabriel
14:06dropped from the sky to save me.
14:10Before we wrap this up,
14:12I have a little something for, uh, for, uh...
14:16Gabriel.
14:18For Gabriel here.
14:20This is a medal of valor
14:23presented by the city
14:25with the date of your heroic rescue.
14:32And this is a check for $1,000.
14:40Mr. Mayor, I am...
14:42yawned flattered by this gesture.
14:45I am truly grateful
14:47that Ms. Truman here's life was saved,
14:50but I'm afraid I must decline this.
14:52You see, um, I have no recollection
14:55of that night or any of these events
14:58and feel like it would be wrong
15:00to take credit for something
15:02I don't feel I did.
15:04I'm sure the mayor here
15:06can find a worthy charity,
15:08maybe help Ms. Truman get some baby clothes
15:11or get her car fixed.
15:13Oh!
15:25Thank you so much.
15:27You're very welcome.
15:31Gabriel! Gabriel, can we just get a picture?
15:34Gabriel! Gabriel, can we just get a picture of you?
15:40What are your plans?
15:42I just want to know where you came from.
15:44Can you just... could you just...
15:46Can we have dinner sometime?
15:48What picture? We just need one picture.
15:50Gabriel?
15:53Well, if you turn down CNN and Dateline,
15:55what makes you think you'll do your show?
15:58Okay. Huh?
16:00Right.
16:02Bye-bye.
16:04Gabriel, you gotta hear this one.
16:06This guy says that he'll fly you out
16:08first class to Los Angeles,
16:10put you up at the Four Seasons,
16:12give you $10,000 in expenses just for...
16:17What's wrong?
16:19Are you in pain?
16:21No. Nothing.
16:25What is it?
16:29I can't...
16:33You can't what?
16:37I can't remember anything.
16:40I mean, it's...
16:42like a freak show and I'm in the spectacle.
16:45Honey.
16:47The other night when I said,
16:49maybe it's better to forget?
16:51Wrong.
16:53Wrong!
16:55Cut that out.
16:57Where's the guy who loves family
16:59and triplet cousins and real smiles?
17:02Think of what you've done.
17:04You have saved a woman's life.
17:07I don't think of you as empty or lost or broken.
17:11I think of you as pure.
17:15As whole.
17:18You are the perfect...
17:22stranger.
17:29I love you.
17:59You didn't.
18:01Oh, yes, we did.
18:03Get out of here.
18:05Sister, I am already gone.
18:07God, when you make a change,
18:09you really make a change.
18:11He is, like, perfect.
18:13It's like all those obnoxious man qualities
18:15that men pick up over the years
18:17was just wiped out along with his memory.
18:19He's like a man the way men should be,
18:21if God were a woman.
18:23You mean she isn't?
18:25I got to go.
18:27Bye.
18:35Oh, hello. May I help you?
18:37Are you Charlotte John?
18:39The one who found the man with the head injury?
18:41I'm Charlotte St. John. Who are you?
18:43I'm Jillian Mathers.
18:45And that so-called Gabriel?
18:47He's mine.
18:49I'm here to collect my husband.
18:57Excuse me.
18:59Do you know where Gabriel is?
19:05Turn it over.
19:07Turn it over.
19:09No, it's not.
19:11You had it.
19:13You really did think you had it.
19:15You keep working on it.
19:17I'll see you later, okay?
19:19Bye.
19:27Bye.
19:43That's her.
19:45With the cell phone.
19:47What's she like?
19:49Jeez, I'm asking you what my wife is like.
19:51She's beautiful.
19:53We really didn't talk much.
19:57Do you have any idea how weird this is?
20:01Look, it's all good, right?
20:03Maybe this will trigger a memory.
20:05Come on, you married her once.
20:07I'm sure she's great.
20:09Yeah, but what about us?
20:11Come on, Gabriel.
20:13Let's go meet your wife.
20:15Got to go.
20:17Oh, Jay!
20:19Oh, my God.
20:21I was so surprised when I saw your picture in the paper.
20:23I mean, what mess have you gotten yourself into this time?
20:25You know, he goes away for two weeks on assignment,
20:27and next thing I know...
20:29Well, what happened?
20:31I mean, can you really not remember anything?
20:37Officer,
20:39I'm out this way, okay?
20:45So my dog was, like, taking a poop,
20:47and I looked down, and...
20:49There!
20:51Well, of course,
20:53we have lots more albums at home.
20:55I just happened to have this one in the car.
20:57Oh, there's our wedding.
20:59You know, I think your mother showed a great deal of courage
21:01wearing that dress.
21:03Good for her.
21:05Oh, and that was your cousin.
21:07What's his name?
21:09Quite the character, yes.
21:11Be grateful you've forgotten that toast.
21:13Is this at all helpful?
21:15Is anything coming back?
21:17No, it's like looking at someone else's life.
21:19Don't worry, he'll come.
21:21Will you be a dear and run off
21:23and get us some coffee?
21:25Oh, I got some right here.
21:27Oh, goody.
21:31So, Jillian, what was Gabe...
21:33I mean, Jay,
21:35what was he like, you know, before?
21:37Well, he wrote
21:39for an Internet magazine, a travel publication,
21:41so he was on the road a lot.
21:43I mean, it doesn't pay very well,
21:45but mercifully, the bulk of Daddy's estate
21:47is to me and not wifey number three.
21:49No, I mean, what was he like as a person?
21:51Like, how did you meet?
21:53In Acapulco, at a bar.
21:55And we're very, very happy.
21:59A little cream, please?
22:07Now, these are lovely offices you have here, Charlotte.
22:09I take it this is the site
22:11of your renowned meeting.
22:13What kind of law do you practice?
22:15Oh, real estate,
22:17land use, a little bit of family law.
22:19These were my dad's offices,
22:21and we were gonna...
22:23Well, my father died when I was in law school,
22:25so we never got whatever.
22:27Anyway, point is, he believed
22:29in serving the community as a general practitioner,
22:31you know, sort of like a family doctor for law.
22:33You know, a little bit of everything.
22:35You know, full service.
22:37So that's what I do.
22:39That's great, Charlotte.
22:41Oh, I don't know. It is a struggle,
22:43you know, running your own business.
22:45Well, anything worthwhile is, right?
22:47But no, you're keeping the family tradition alive.
22:49That's great. I bet your dad would be very proud.
22:51Yeah.
22:53What was he like, your dad?
22:55Oh, he was a real tiger.
22:57Really? Yeah?
22:59Or maybe it's a struggle because you're not a very good lawyer.
23:01Whoa. Hey, now, just a minute.
23:03You know, all right, enough of this.
23:05I have a phoner lined up with Anderson Cooper's producer,
23:07and we have wasted enough time with this small-town lawyer
23:09on a Florence Nightingale trip.
23:11Excuse me, this woman went out of her way
23:13to help a complete stranger
23:15and has not asked for one thing in return,
23:17and I refuse to have you or anyone else speak to her that way.
23:19Please, you have to understand...
23:21Jay, the sooner you scrape this town off the bottom of your shoes,
23:23we can get back to our life,
23:25a life we were very happy with, thank you very much.
23:27The sooner things can get back to normal.
23:29Well, maybe I'm not ready to have things get back to normal.
23:31Please, Gabriel.
23:33Jay, Jay, his name is Jay, you twit.
23:35A twit? How dare you call her a twit?
23:37Your name is Jay.
23:39She's gone out of her way to help me.
23:41You have any sympathy for what she's been through?
23:43All she's done is try to take care of me
23:45the best way she possibly knows how.
23:47Yes, of course, we'll be right there.
23:49All you do is treat her...
23:51William Crawford Foxborough?
23:53Pretty fancy name for a common thug.
23:55Petty theft, shoplifting, possession,
23:57pickpocketing, breaking and entering,
23:59and apparently, most recently,
24:01mugging and assault with a deadly weapon.
24:03Officers, is this really necessary?
24:05I had a fever that was there,
24:07Ladies and gents,
24:09Mr. Foxborough.
24:17My first dead body.
24:19Oh.
24:21You never forget your first.
24:25So, uh,
24:27this face ring any bells,
24:29as they say?
24:31No, not me.
24:33Well, why don't you just try not thinking about it?
24:35Or just try absorbing it with your feelings,
24:37see if anything comes up.
24:51Any images at all?
24:55No.
24:57That's him.
24:59That's the man who tried to kill me.
25:05Mr. Gabriel, I just want you to know
25:07that the police will not be pressing charges
25:09when they consider this an act of self-defense.
25:11Well then, looks like you've got your positive ID,
25:13so I guess my job's done here.
25:15God!
25:27I almost had a heart attack.
25:31Your turn.
25:35This.
25:37Must have been a beautiful ceremony.
25:39Look how happy I am.
25:41And Jillian,
25:43so traditional, the vows,
25:45cake, tuxes,
25:47all the joy of a new beginning.
25:49I don't care.
25:51I mean, not at all.
25:55It's not just that
25:57those emotions seem
25:59to belong to someone else,
26:01it's that
26:03I have feelings of my own.
26:05Real feelings that
26:07belong to me.
26:13These last few days, Charlotte,
26:15I've
26:17felt things between us
26:19that I don't want to lose.
26:21Don't, Gabriel, stop.
26:25I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel things too,
26:27believe me.
26:29But that woman in there,
26:31smart, beautiful,
26:33uptight, scared, snooty,
26:35insecure,
26:37caring woman,
26:39I've got to pass with her.
26:41And a future.
26:45I won't come between a husband and his wife.
26:57Well, let's just say our goodbyes now, then.
27:01Gabriel.
27:03Misha.
27:09Let's go.
27:31Who's this?
27:33Wouldn't say.
27:35Hi, I'm Charlotte St. John.
27:37Yeah, hi.
27:39Is that your wife?
27:41Uh, yes.
27:43Why?
27:45Hey!
27:47Why?
27:49Because you're already married to me, that's why.
27:51You bastard.
27:53You bastard.
28:01Miss St. John!
28:03Charlotte, Charlotte, a few words!
28:05Any comments?
28:07No comments.
28:11Hello?
28:13Charlotte, I need to see you.
28:15Gabriel?
28:17Yeah, I want to talk to you.
28:19Charlotte? Charlotte?
28:21I have nothing to say to you.
28:37All the phone lines are jammed.
28:39Two TV crews in the lobby.
28:41Some women's group
28:43protesting in my private facilities.
28:47Just tell me that there's a way out of this.
28:49I pledge to uphold
28:51the Constitution, pursue the truth,
28:53and serve the interests of justice.
28:55That's my district attorney's
28:57oath of office. Anybody else's?
28:59Listen, Eva.
29:01I've had my damn picture
29:03taken with that kid.
29:05I gave him an award.
29:07I stood there smiling like a kid
29:09in a candy store.
29:13Eva, I want you to tell me
29:15that this thing
29:17is going to go away.
29:19No, Mayor.
29:21You need to blow it up.
29:23Listen, this case isn't just about bigamy.
29:25We can nail this guy on tax evasion,
29:27real estate fraud, maybe even conspiracy.
29:29He's going down.
29:31Furthermore, people hate bigamists.
29:33Hate them. Women hate them
29:35because they represent the lowest facet of the male personality.
29:37But men hate them, too.
29:39You know why?
29:41Because you're jealous of them.
29:43This guy had his cake
29:45and ate it, too.
29:47Now, it's true. The media's all over this one.
29:49But that's good news.
29:51Because you, Mayor,
29:53you are going to be the hero who brings down
29:55this guilty, vulgar bigamist
29:57in the eyes of this county's
29:5990,000 voters.
30:07Okay,
30:09Eva.
30:11What's the plan?
30:13No good,
30:15stinking, conniving,
30:17pro-life, degenerate,
30:19fraudulent.
30:21There is no such thing as the human race.
30:23There's the male race and the female race.
30:25Because you and I have more in common with some
30:27Aztec tribeswoman from the jungles of
30:29Mexico, I think.
30:31Than we do with our own brothers.
30:33They're just a totally different species.
30:35Yeah, you got that right.
30:37I feel sick.
30:39Too much ice cream.
30:41I know.
30:43I really thought that this time...
30:45I know.
30:49What the hell was that?
30:51Oh, it's some producer from today's show.
30:53He's relentless.
31:01Oh, my God.
31:03It's him.
31:05Matt Lauer?
31:07No, no. Him, him.
31:09Let me in, will you?
31:11Charlotte, will you let me in? Open the door, please.
31:13What do you want?
31:15Hey, Charlotte.
31:17How you doing?
31:19Me? I've had better weeks.
31:21Yeah, I know. Hey, listen, Charlotte, will you open the door?
31:23There's something I want to tell you.
31:27I'm not really interested
31:29in whatever you have to say to me.
31:35Charlotte, come on.
31:37Charlotte?
31:47Charlotte, I just want to talk to you for a second.
31:51Come down
31:53and put your hands on your head.
31:55Come on, Charlotte, please.
31:57Just open the door for a minute.
32:03Please be careful.
32:05Turn around.
32:07Kneel down and put your hands on your head.
32:09Charlotte!
32:15Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
32:17You have the right to an attorney.
32:19I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
32:21I'm sorry for bringing all this into your life.
32:23I know you don't deserve it.
32:25Charlotte!
32:27I know you don't deserve it.
32:29That's all I wanted to say, Charlotte.
32:31That's all I wanted to say.
32:33Hey, Jay, over here. Can I get your picture?
32:41Your lawyer's here.
32:43I don't have one. Send him away.
32:53Last guy who said he was my lawyer
32:55turned out to be some Hollywood agent.
32:57I'm not your lawyer, by the way.
32:59It was the only way to get in.
33:01So why are you here?
33:03I don't know.
33:05Curiosity? Closure?
33:07Yeah, it doesn't matter.
33:09I don't need a lawyer anyway.
33:11Yeah, why not?
33:13Because I'm guilty. What's the point?
33:15Guilty.
33:17Yeah, yeah, guilty.
33:19I mean, you saw those women. You saw the evidence.
33:21I'm a bigamist.
33:23Yeah, you are.
33:25Yeah, and I deserve everything that's coming.
33:27I mean, I am scum.
33:29I don't know.
33:31What kind of jerk?
33:33Well, apparently me.
33:35I mean, this Jay Miller,
33:37this guy,
33:39he is a horse's ass.
33:41I mean, he is a coward and a criminal.
33:45But he's inside me somewhere.
33:47There's no denying it.
33:51Are you hurt?
33:53It's nothing Jay Miller didn't have coming.
33:55Who is Jay Miller?
33:57He's the guy that ruined my life.
33:59He's the man I hate for what he did to you.
34:01To us.
34:05I'll be happy to see him go to prison.
34:09Who is Gabriel?
34:11His latest victim.
34:21Let's face it, Charlotte.
34:23I was a bad man.
34:27People don't change, do they?
34:29Well, Gabriel didn't take credit
34:31for saving a woman's life.
34:33I mean, how could I?
34:35It wasn't me.
34:37I mean, not inside.
34:41So why should Gabriel take credit
34:43for Jay Miller's crimes?
34:57Hold still!
35:19Before this arraignment gets underway,
35:21let me be perfectly clear.
35:23I will stand for no shenanigans
35:25in this courtroom.
35:27No grandstanding, no showboating,
35:29and no media interference.
35:31If I suspect that anyone is playing to the cameras,
35:33then I will throw you
35:35and every other so-called journalist out of this court.
35:37Is that clear?
35:39Is that clear?
35:45Good.
35:47In the matter of the State of Illinois
35:49versus Jay Miller,
35:51charged with one count of bigamy,
35:53one count of tax evasion,
35:55four counts of real estate fraud,
35:57and one count of conspiracy to defraud the government,
35:59how do you plead?
36:01Your Honor,
36:03we intend to prove
36:05that this man is not Jay Miller.
36:15And is therefore not guilty.
36:24Are you sure you need your dinner?
36:26Mm-hmm.
36:35It may sound repetitious, me thanking you all the time,
36:37but I just want to thank you again for bailing me out.
36:39You're welcome.
36:41Just don't skip count on me, okay?
36:43Seriously, Charlotte.
36:45I...
36:47I can't pay you.
36:49I mean, not now, at least.
36:51And I'll be taking time away from clients that actually could pay.
36:53Are you sure that...
36:55Gabriel, listen.
36:57I'm doing this for you, but I'm also doing it for me.
36:59Okay?
37:07You graduated from Dartmouth
37:09with honors.
37:11Impressive.
37:13Second lead in the school play one term,
37:15theta delta fraternity, rowing, and...
37:17boxing.
37:19Mucho macho.
37:21What was my major?
37:23Um, art history.
37:25So much for the macho theory.
37:27Oh, yeah?
37:29What was your major?
37:31Women's studies.
37:33Biochemistry.
37:35That's right. Dad wanted medical school.
37:37I guess my recent memory
37:39sucks, too.
37:43So, we married wife number one,
37:45the ever-charming Alicia,
37:47right out of college.
37:49She was a local girl.
37:51Oh, isn't that romantic?
37:53The frat boy and his townie girlfriend.
37:55Well, maybe it was true love.
37:57Yeah. So you take a job with the travel magazine
37:59in Detroit, work your way up
38:01from coffee boy to reporter,
38:03and four years ago, you joined
38:05PlanesTransitCenter.com,
38:07some online travel site located in, uh...
38:09Chicago.
38:11Where was
38:13wife number one?
38:15Virginia, Michigan.
38:17Then you meet Jillian in Alcapulco
38:19six months later, and bam,
38:21you're married again.
38:23Somehow you manage to keep them both on the hook.
38:25I just can't believe what a jerk I was.
38:27Hey, none of that.
38:29The not guilty applies
38:31to you, too.
38:33Okay, counselor.
38:35Now, the bigamy charge is the key.
38:37It's a predicative crime, meaning all other charges hinge on it.
38:39So we've got to understand
38:41the life of Jay Miller thoroughly.
38:43Yes. Next, we'll need an expert
38:45witness or two of our own, though
38:47experts in what I haven't a clue of yet.
38:49Uh, we'll look for anything
38:51even resembling a legal precedent,
38:53and then we'll beat the bushes for character witnesses.
38:55And then...
38:57Then?
38:59Then we hope for a miracle.
39:01You're amazing.
39:03I mean, I mean,
39:05you are really incredible.
39:07It's like you're on fire.
39:09No, well, I'm
39:11sure that you can see. I mean...
39:25Wait, wait, wait.
39:27Gabriel, wait. Wait.
39:29Wait, listen. Hey, listen.
39:31No, no, no. It's not that.
39:33Listen. Are you okay?
39:35Yeah, I'm fine. Listen, this trial
39:37is about personal integrity,
39:39and they take that very seriously.
39:41And I'm your lawyer, and...
39:43Oh, okay, I get it.
39:45No sleeping with the client, right?
39:47Well, yeah, that's it. No, that's not just it.
39:49Hey, hey, it's okay. It's okay. I understand.
39:55Besides,
39:57you're a married man.
39:59Yeah, well, call it a hunch,
40:01but I see divorce in my near future.
40:03Yeah, well, your wife's her idiot,
40:05because I think you're a real keeper.
40:07Really?
40:09I think you're a real keeper, too,
40:11Charlotte St. John.
40:15No.
40:17Oh, boy.
40:19This is gonna be a lot harder than I thought.
40:21Yeah, well, let's just hope it's a short trial.
40:23You know, as long as we're staying together,
40:25they aren't gonna gossip.
40:27Yeah, but we'll know.
40:37Oh.
40:43Excuse me, I'm looking for...
40:45Sorry.
40:47Um, do you know where's the
40:49Hoos Hill of American Psychiatry?
40:57Mm-mm-mm.
41:07So you had no idea what was going on?
41:09No clue.
41:11Okay, that's a load. That's a big load, Dave.
41:13Okay, look, we knew he was married,
41:15and everybody knew Jay had something going on inside.
41:17Just not that he was married to two chicks at once.
41:19You know, I figured he was double-dipping
41:21with some married Betty.
41:23You never thought to question him?
41:25Question him?
41:27Dude, one day a couple months ago,
41:29they both show up in our lobby at the same time.
41:31I totally covered for him with one
41:33so he could bail on the other, you know?
41:35I mean, that's what friends are for,
41:37you know what I'm saying?
41:39And clearly, what a good friend you are.
41:41More power to you, Dave.
41:45Uh, St. John, wait.
41:47Uh, something else about Jay.
41:49Let me guess.
41:51He was also stripping the Betty in accounting with big boobs.
41:53No, no, you don't understand.
41:55Um, I mean, Jay really tried, you know?
41:57Uh, he called them both constantly.
41:59He never forgot a birthday, an anniversary.
42:01And he bought them gifts.
42:03Really thoughtful gifts.
42:05We didn't know he was a bigotist.
42:07God's honest truth.
42:09But, um...
42:11I think that he truly loved them both.
42:23Hi, this is Charlotte St. John.
42:25If this is the correct number for Meena Truman,
42:27can you please call me back?
42:29It is very important.
42:31Okay, thank you. Bye.
42:35Hey, what's wrong?
42:37Are you okay?
42:39No, I'm fine, I'm fine.
42:41What are you watching?
42:43Oh, it's this movie.
42:45About that woman.
42:47She's the aunt of that kid.
42:49And his mother dies.
42:51Give me a break.
42:53Talk about corny drivel.
42:55I'm sorry.
43:13Did you ever cheat on your husband?
43:15What?
43:17I object to that line of questioning now,
43:19and I'll object to it in court.
43:21Well, good for you, but this is a deposition.
43:23Smile.
43:25No.
43:29So, knowing you're under oath,
43:31if I found someone who said that you did,
43:33they'd be lying.
43:35Yes, bitch.
43:37I'll ignore that.
43:39Did you love your husband?
43:41Yeah.
43:43Did you satisfy your husband sexually?
43:45Hell yes.
43:47But from what I hear,
43:49you're the one toasting his muffin now, skank.
43:51Sit down, Alicia.
43:53No, you know what? You're a disgrace.
43:55He broke my heart, and he broke the law.
43:57I mean, death isn't good enough for that dirtbag.
43:59That's it. Sit down.
44:03Charming.
44:05It's just shocking to imagine
44:07that somehow Jay was unhappily married to you.
44:09Yep.
44:15But all I need is another 30 days.
44:17I can pay half now.
44:19Okay, I promise.
44:21Okay, bye-bye.
44:23Gabriel must be an angel
44:25because he couldn't possibly love you for your money.
44:27How's abstinence?
44:29Killing me. It's kind of great,
44:31because for once I don't feel like I'm a card
44:33leaning against the wall for support.
44:35Okay, whatever. When can I see him with his shirt off?
44:37Hey, get this.
44:39I think I finally figured out how he did it.
44:41Jay Miller's office was located in the same city
44:43as wife number two.
44:45Then he would go traveling for his job,
44:47and he would take those trips to a weekend,
44:49and that way he could see wife number one
44:51every other weekend while wife number two
44:53thought that he was still traveling.
44:55Say what you will, but this Jay Miller
44:57was one organized S.O.B.
44:59Speak of the fallen angel.
45:01Hey, guys.
45:03Hey, yourself. Where you been?
45:05Volunteering at the hospital, children's ward.
45:07It's the only place they don't seem to mind my sordid past.
45:09I thought you might be here, Gwen.
45:11Soy chai tea latte, one sugar, right?
45:13Right.
45:15Yep.
45:17I just wanted to see if you were real.
45:21I gotta go.
45:23If Metatremo calls, page me, okay?
45:25Okay.
45:33So who's your favorite host on The View?
45:37You live just a few hours away from Alicia,
45:39but the first time you saw her was in my office.
45:41We travel in different circles, dear.
45:45Didn't you think it was strange
45:47that you only saw your husband once a week, every month?
45:51I admired his work ethic.
45:59Now, just a few days ago,
46:01you said that you loved your husband,
46:03and now you hate him.
46:05How is that possible?
46:07How can the man of your dreams
46:09become the man of your nightmares in an instant?
46:11Here we go.
46:13He is not a pig.
46:15He is not some plaything that you discovered.
46:19You are defending a subhuman
46:21who humiliated me on national television.
46:23Can you please instruct your client?
46:25I will have my revenge,
46:27in court or out,
46:29and it will be complete.
46:33Well, that about wraps it up for me.
46:35You have no idea who you're dealing with,
46:37you warped little tramp.
46:39No idea.
46:43No idea.
47:13I'm telling you,
47:15it's not safe.
47:17I don't think you should be alone.
47:19It's just a few dents. I'll be fine.
47:21A few dents? Are you kidding me?
47:23If she's done that, who knows what she's capable of?
47:25I think she should be arrested.
47:27Oh, I have a much better idea.
47:31What do you expect to transpire here today?
47:33We have just a couple of questions.
47:37There's an old expression in this country,
47:39something about a person, even a man,
47:41being innocent until proven guilty.
47:43I hope that certain people will remember that
47:45before they decide to assault my client's car again.
47:47What happened?
47:49What do you mean, what certain people? Who did this?
47:51Who did this? Well, I'm not saying,
47:53but there's another old expression about
47:55hell having no fury like a woman's scorn.
47:57Are you saying it's related to my car?
47:59No one's gonna feel sorry for a lawyer.
48:01It's a white lie. Assume it.
48:03Curious eyes from around the country
48:05have turned to this small courthouse
48:07just 2 hours north of Chicago
48:09for the first day of Jay Miller's trial.
48:11But is the accused bigamist a changed man?
48:13Beast, angel, or demon?
48:15That's for a jury of his peers to determine.
48:17We even wrote our own vows.
48:19There's just one moon up in the sky.
48:21Me for you until I die.
48:23There's just one moon up in the sky.
48:25There's just one moon up in the sky.
48:27There's just one moon up in the sky.
48:29There's just one moon up in the sky.
48:31Me for you until I die.
48:33There's just one sun up above.
48:35You for me, my one true love.
48:41Objection.
48:43Since my client has no memory of this,
48:45how do we know she's not just making it up?
48:51Is this your diary, Alicia?
48:53Yes.
48:55I've kept it for years.
48:57I rewrote our vows
48:59for every anniversary.
49:03People's Exhibit 1A, Your Honor.
49:09Your copy.
49:11Mrs. Miller,
49:13how do you feel about your husband now?
49:15Well, when I first found out,
49:17I was angry.
49:19I even started to rip up my diary.
49:21I mean, I'm sorry he hurt his head and all, but...
49:23He saved a woman's life.
49:25Don't you think his heroism
49:27deserves a little consideration here?
49:29Objection. She's not a legal expert.
49:31I'm gonna allow it.
49:33Jay, a hero?
49:37For three years, he lived a lie.
49:39For three years,
49:41he shared his bed with another woman.
49:43He held her,
49:45and he kissed her, and he lied to her.
49:47For three years,
49:49he took all that was sacred to me
49:51and to all of us who believe in love
49:53and treated it like dirt.
49:55If you're a woman,
49:57you tell me.
49:59How does one night,
50:01not even one night, how does five
50:03minutes make up for three years
50:05of betrayal?
50:09No further questions,
50:11Your Honor.
50:13You may
50:15step down, Miss.
50:31So you had no idea
50:33that your husband was cheating,
50:35let alone married.
50:37Smart woman like you?
50:39In retrospect, all the signs were there.
50:41The travel, the credit card receipts,
50:43the phone calls in the middle of the night.
50:45But I confess
50:47that I loved him,
50:49and love is blind.
50:51And what did you do when you found out
50:53that he was cheating on you?
50:55I called the police, I called my lawyers,
50:57and I changed my bank accounts, in that order.
50:59Not a woman to be messed with, are you?
51:01No, I don't suppose I am.
51:03You've even spoken of revenge.
51:05Miss St. John, I don't believe in
51:07whining or pity or victimization.
51:09I'm not going to sit idly by
51:11while the rights of women are trampled.
51:13And furthermore, bigamy is a crime,
51:15plain and simple,
51:17and I believe that criminals belong in jail.
51:23Hi, it's Charlotte St. John again.
51:25Mina, please return my phone calls.
51:27555-3846.
51:29I thought you were great today, by the way.
51:31Did we learn anything?
51:33Yes, you're a terrible poet.
51:37What do you say we skip to the dessert,
51:39head to the couch,
51:41and see what's on Lifetime?
51:43Are you kidding me?
51:45I've got tons of work to do.
51:47So I was reading this article today,
51:49and it dawned on me that there were
51:51two presidents named George Bush.
51:53So I'm thinking, we should only elect
51:55presidents named George Bush.
51:57Easier for high school students to remember
51:59and bonus for amnesiacs.
52:01Gabriel, this is really not the time for jokes, okay?
52:03We got our asses handed to us today.
52:05And you aren't looking at real jail time,
52:07don't you get it?
52:09I'm not looking at real jail time.
52:11I'm looking at real life.
52:13I'm looking at real life.
52:15I'm not looking at real jail time, don't you get it?
52:17I just thought it would be helpful
52:19to lighten the mood a little.
52:21Well, it's not helpful. It's annoying.
52:23Hey, where are you going?