12 Stoic Principles for life Listen to this, They will prioritize you STOICISM
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00:0012 Stoic Rules for Life
00:03Listen to this, they will prioritize you.
00:06Stoicism
00:07Welcome to Stoic in Your Life, where ancient wisdom meets modern life.
00:12Have you ever felt invisible in the eyes of someone you deeply admire?
00:17It's a sting that echoes the neglect of your emotions, as if your presence barely registers
00:22in their world.
00:23Despite your profound affection and care, they seem oblivious to your existence.
00:29But imagine, just for a moment, if you could turn the tables.
00:33What if you could transform into a person of such captivating interest that they naturally
00:39prioritize you?
00:40In today's episode, we're diving into 12 Stoic Rules for Life, principles that not
00:47only enrich your personal growth, but also make you irresistibly magnetic in the eyes
00:52of others.
00:54These rules aren't just advice, they are life changers.
00:59We're going to explore each one in depth, unraveling how they can revolutionize your
01:03relationships and your approach to life.
01:06So stay with us throughout this journey, as each rule holds a key to unlocking a more
01:11fulfilling and respected existence.
01:14Let's embark on this transformative path together.
01:18Don't make someone the most important thing in your life.
01:21Consider this, your life is a unique tapestry, woven with threads of your own dreams, ambitions,
01:28and individuality.
01:30Imagine yourself as a radiant star in the vast cosmos, emitting your own distinct light
01:35and energy.
01:37Your journey is yours alone, distinct and separate from anyone else's orbit.
01:42It's crucial not to let your entire existence revolve around a single person.
01:48Embrace your dreams, your goals, in the essence of who you are.
01:52This mindset not only makes you more intriguing, but also keeps others fascinated by your life
01:58and what ignites your passion.
02:01Your independence and zest for adventure don't just enhance your relationships, they enrich
02:06them, fostering a dynamic where both individuals enhance each other's lives while remaining
02:12true to their own paths.
02:14When you refrain from placing someone at the epicenter of your universe, your allure only
02:20intensifies.
02:22Leading a life that transcends the confines of a relationship allows you to continue evolving,
02:28injecting both excitement and liberty into your partnership.
02:32Reflect on the words of Marcus Aurelius, the esteemed emperor and philosopher.
02:37If you're at peace with yourself, you're in harmony with the universe.
02:43This profound statement resonates deeply with the concept of maintaining autonomy within
02:49relationships.
02:50Let's draw inspiration from a historical figure like Sir Isaac Newton, whose groundbreaking
02:55scientific contributions revolutionized our understanding of the universe.
03:01Despite his intense professional commitments, Newton maintained a rich personal life, filled
03:07with hobbies, friendships, and individual pursuits.
03:11He exemplified a delicate balance between professional dedication and a robust personal
03:18identity.
03:19This balance not only made him an extraordinary scientist, but also a well-rounded individual,
03:25admired for both his intellectual prowess and his independent spirit.
03:31This splendor of personal independence and professional commitment serves as a stellar
03:35example, illustrating how such a balance can lead to a more fulfilling and harmonious life.
03:42Incorporating this rule into our modern lives, we find that it's not just about the relationships
03:48we nurture with others, but also about the relationship we cultivate with ourselves.
03:55It's a reminder to prioritize our own makes us better partners, friends, and individuals.
04:01As you navigate the complexities of modern living, remember to cherish and develop your
04:07own identity, for it is the foundation upon which all other aspects of your life are built.
04:13Keep some things to yourself and be a bit mysterious.
04:17In the realm of Stoicism, there's a profound rule that can transform how others perceive you.
04:23Embrace the art of mystery.
04:25Picture yourself as a captivating novel, one with chapters that reveal themselves gradually,
04:31fostering intrigue and curiosity.
04:34This approach aligns with Seneca's wisdom, to be everywhere is to be nowhere.
04:40It's about striking a balance between being present and maintaining an air of enigma.
04:45Imagine your life as a tapestry of stories, each segment unfolding in its own time, inviting
04:51others to delve deeper into the essence of who you are.
04:55Consider the allure of Cleopatra, a figure shrouded in mystery.
05:00Her enigmatic nature wasn't just about withholding information, it was about the strategic revelation
05:07of her character, which drew people towards her.
05:10Simulate this by walking in charted paths in your interactions, revealing layers of
05:15your personality in unexpected ways.
05:19This tactic not only captivates, but also encourages others to invest time in understanding you.
05:26In essence, think of your life as a series of unfolding narratives.
05:31By not laying all your cards on the table immediately, you create a magnetic pull.
05:37People naturally gravitate towards what they don't fully understand, driven by the desire
05:42to uncover the unknown.
05:45As you navigate through life, remember this stoic principle, a touch of mystery.
05:51Not only adds depth to your character, but also makes your presence more compelling.
05:56Let others embark on the journey of discovering you, turning every interaction into an opportunity
06:02for deeper connection and understanding.
06:06Don't always be the one to start the conversation.
06:09This rule is a guiding principle in maintaining balance and mutual respect in our relationships.
06:16It's about understanding that constantly initiating conversations may not always be beneficial.
06:23By occasionally stepping back, you allow space for others to show their interest and investment
06:28in the relationship.
06:30This approach not only demonstrates that you have rich life filled with diverse interests
06:35and activities, but also serves as a barometer for gauging the other person's engagement
06:41and interest in you.
06:42Remember, this isn't a game of tactics.
06:45It's a practice of self-respect and mutual regard.
06:49As Marcus Aurelius wisely pointed out, the best way to get back at someone who did you
06:54wrong is to not act like them.
06:57Applying this to our communication means avoiding behaviors that lead to imbalance or feelings
07:03of being underappreciated.
07:05It's about not constantly seeking attention or approval, but rather maintaining your dignity
07:11and self-worth.
07:12Seneca, who once said, true happiness is to enjoy the present without anxious dependence
07:18upon the future.
07:20This echoes our rule beautifully.
07:22By not always being the one to initiate, you live in the present focusing on your own life
07:28and well-being, rather than being anxiously fixated on the response of others.
07:33In conclusion, prioritize your self-respect and let relationships develop naturally with
07:40mutual effort and interest.
07:42This approach not only fosters healthier interactions, but also aligns with the Stoic philosophy
07:48of maintaining balance and focusing on what truly matters in life.
07:53In the ebb and flow of conversations like the tides, there is a time to speak and a
07:59time to listen.
08:00Cultivate a presence that commands respect and admiration.
08:04In the journey of life, especially for men in the prime years of 30 to 65, it's crucial
08:11to understand the value of your presence in the lives of others.
08:15Often people tend to overlook what is readily available, but they deeply value what they
08:21fear losing.
08:23Someone whose absence would leave a profound void.
08:26You are not merely an option among many.
08:29You are an essential, unique presence.
08:32How do you achieve this stature?
08:34It begins with cultivating independence and self-sufficiency.
08:38Your life should be an embodiment of interest and fulfillment, independent of others' presence.
08:45This autonomy makes others perceive being a part of your life as a privilege, not a
08:50given expectation.
08:53This concept echoes a Stoic principle beautifully articulated by Epictetus.
08:58We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to
09:04them.
09:05By embracing this philosophy, you fortify your inner strength.
09:10Your power emanates from your independence and the richness of your life.
09:15Others will view you as a pivotal figure, not just another individual vying for their
09:20attention.
09:21They should be the ones striving to remain in your orbit, not the other way around.
09:27Instill a subtle sense of trepidation about losing your presence in their lives.
09:32Let them actively seek to be a part of your journey, recognizing your value.
09:37Consider the synergy between Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak during Apple's nascent stages.
09:43Wozniak, with his exceptional engineering prowess, was instrumental in developing the
09:49first Apple computers.
09:51His technical acumen and innovative thinking were pivotal in Apple's initial success.
09:57Jobs recognizing the uniqueness of Wozniak's talents not only collaborated with him, but
10:03also amplified his contributions in their partnership.
10:08Wozniak was more than a collaborator.
10:10He was indispensable.
10:12His absence would have posed a significant setback for Jobs and Apple.
10:17This exemplifies the importance of acknowledging and valuing each individual's contributions
10:22in any collaborative endeavor, striving to be someone irreplaceable in any team or relationship.
10:29In today's fast-paced world where attention is a scarce commodity, it's vital to position
10:35yourself as someone of unique value and substance.
10:38By doing so, you not only enhance your self-worth, but also inspire others to recognize and cherish
10:46your presence in their lives.
10:49This approach, deeply rooted in Stoic wisdom, offers a powerful framework for navigating
10:55interpersonal dynamics with dignity and respect.
11:00Cherish your time.
11:01Don't always be on standby.
11:03In a world where the extraordinary is not commonplace, your availability should mirror
11:08that rarity.
11:10Recognize the worth of your time.
11:12It's a treasure not to be squandered on just anyone who requests it.
11:17Prioritize your life.
11:19Envision a life where you're not perpetually on hold, not constantly aligning your schedule
11:25to suit others' whims.
11:27You have your own journey to embark on, and those who are part of it should count themselves
11:32fortunate.
11:33It's crucial to strike a balance.
11:36Don't be perpetually poised to abandon your pursuits for someone else.
11:41Demonstrate that your time and focus are precious.
11:44People gravitate towards those who are engaged in their own passions and agendas.
11:49When you're not just idle awaiting, it piques their interest.
11:53They wonder about your endeavors.
11:56And this curiosity fosters a desire to be part of your world.
12:01Being perpetually available gives the impression that you're easily attainable.
12:06But remember, you are not just anybody.
12:09You are a person of value.
12:11This approach isn't about playing hard to get.
12:14It's about showcasing an enriching life, independent of others.
12:19By not always being at their beck and call, they begin to value the moments they share
12:24with you more.
12:26Resist the temptation to be always on call.
12:29Reflect on Seneca's wisdom.
12:31We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.
12:35This teaches us to value our own time and beliefs, rather than succumbing to the fear
12:40of missing out or the need to be constantly reachable.
12:45Consider the example of Ada Lovelace, an extraordinary figure in history, a mathematician and writer.
12:52Ada is celebrated as one of the earliest computer programmers.
12:56Despite living in an era that confined women to limited roles and constant availability,
13:02Ada defied these norms.
13:04She immersed herself in complex mathematics and collaborated with luminaries like Charles
13:10Babbage.
13:11Her commitment to her work and her choice to not always be accessible enhanced her allure
13:17and respect.
13:18Ada's narrative is a testament to the power of forging your own path and captivating others
13:24with your fervent passion and intellect.
13:27She didn't linger for others.
13:29She blazed her own trail.
13:31Inspiring those around her with her remarkable mind and dedication, cultivate your inner
13:37joy.
13:38This rule emphasizes the profound truth that genuine happiness is an internal state, not
13:45reliant on external factors.
13:47It's about nurturing self-confidence and independence, qualities that inherently enhance your appeal
13:53to others.
13:54By seeking joy within yourself rather than relying on others to provide it, you become
14:00a beacon of positivity and self-assurance.
14:04This inner radiance is naturally alluring to those around you.
14:08Embracing your own happiness signifies that you are not in pursuit of someone else to
14:13complete you.
14:14You stand as a person who is already content and whole, which is inherently attractive.
14:20This doesn't mean you shun the company of others, but rather, you seek to share your
14:25existing joy with them, enhancing their lives as well.
14:29Your presence, glowing with optimism and self-confidence, effortlessly draws people
14:35towards you.
14:36Seneca, the Stoic philosopher, once remarked,
14:39True happiness is to enjoy the present without anxious dependence upon the future.
14:45This encapsulates the essence of self-sourced happiness.
14:50Consider the example of Theodore Roosevelt.
14:53Despite facing immense personal tragedies, like the loss of his wife and mother on the
14:57same day, he found ways to cultivate his own happiness.
15:02He led a vigorous and impactful life, engaging in activities like boxing and public service.
15:09His vitality and joy were self-generated, independent of external validation.
15:16This inner strength not only made him a beloved leader, but also a testament to the power
15:21of self-cultivated happiness, even in adversity.
15:25In conclusion, the lesson here is clear.
15:28Seek happiness within yourself.
15:30It's a journey of becoming your own source of joy and fulfillment.
15:34By doing so, you not only enrich your own life, but also become a source of inspiration
15:41and positivity for those around you.
15:44Remember, your happiness is a light that can illuminate not just your path, but also the
15:49paths of others.
15:51Make yourself valuable and let others invest in you.
15:55Imagine yourself as a rare and precious gem, unique in your own right.
16:00Your presence in someone's life should be more than just existing.
16:04It should be a meaningful and deliberate contribution.
16:08It's a universal truth that easily obtained things are often undervalued.
16:14True appreciation emerges when effort and commitment are involved.
16:18As others invest their time, emotions, and energy in you, their bond with you deepens.
16:25You transform from a mere acquaintance to someone they deeply cherish.
16:30Your role is not to plead for affection or attention, rather it's to demonstrate that
16:34you add significant value to their lives, something that captivates their sincere interest.
16:41Encourage them to invest in you, making your presence an indispensable part of their existence,
16:47something they wouldn't dream of losing.
16:50Seneca wisely stated,
16:51To make a precious stone shine, you have to rub it, and to make a person better they need
16:57to face difficulties.
16:59This illustrates that your value lies not merely in existing, but in being sought after
17:04and striving for self-improvement.
17:07Reflect on the relationship between Alexander the Great and his mentor, Aristotle.
17:12Aristotle was no ordinary teacher for the young prince.
17:16He was a beacon of knowledge and strategic thinking, crucial for governing an empire.
17:22Alexander, renowned for his ambition and intelligence, recognized the immense value of Aristotle's
17:28guidance.
17:29He dedicated considerable time and effort to his studies.
17:33Their bond transcended the typical student-teacher dynamic.
17:37It was a profound connection where the student viewed the teacher as an invaluable source
17:41of wisdom, akin to a treasure trove.
17:45Aristotle didn't simplify Alexander's path to knowledge.
17:49He presented it as a challenging quest for wisdom, thereby magnifying the significance
17:55of his teachings in shaping Alexander's remarkable legacy.
17:59Make sure your needs come first.
18:01This rule is a beacon guiding us to prioritize our well-being and self-respect in every relationship.
18:09It's a reminder that you, yes you, are invaluable.
18:12Your happiness, your self-esteem, should never be on the negotiation table, especially not
18:19for someone who fails to appreciate your worth.
18:22Imagine standing in a room, your presence as significant as anyone else's.
18:28You're not there to be overshadowed or to seek validation.
18:32Your role is to cultivate relationships rooted in mutual respect, where your feelings are
18:37not just heard but valued.
18:40By championing your own happiness, you become a pivotal figure in any relationship.
18:46This rule is essentially about placing your dreams and aspirations at the forefront.
18:51It echoes the wisdom of Marcus Aurelius, who once said,
18:55What really bothers people are not the things that happen, but how they think about them.
19:01This ties beautifully with our rule, underscoring the power of perspective in handling relationship
19:07dynamics.
19:08Let's draw inspiration from Lucius Quinctius Cincinnati, a Roman leader renowned not just
19:13for his military and political acumen, but for his unwavering commitment to his principles.
19:20Despite temptations of power and prestige, he remained true to his values, returning
19:26to his simple farm life when his duty ended.
19:29Cincinnati exemplifies the essence of putting your needs and values first, a testament to
19:35the importance of self-respect and personal integrity in all facets of life.
19:41In conclusion, this rule is a call to action for you to embrace your worth and prioritize
19:47your happiness.
19:48It's about building a life where your dreams and values are not just an afterthought, but
19:54the driving force.
19:56Remember, in the grand theater of life, you are not just a spectator, but a lead actor,
20:02directing a story of self-respect and fulfillment.
20:06Don't get too attached emotionally.
20:08In our journey through life, especially when it comes to relationships, it's crucial to
20:13strike a delicate balance in our emotional investment.
20:17This rule, my friends, is not about suppressing your emotions, but rather about mastering
20:22them.
20:23Imagine you're on a path to becoming significant in someone's life.
20:28It's essential here to ensure that your emotions don't overshadow the essence of the relationship,
20:34your feelings, your needs.
20:36They must be acknowledged and respected, but they shouldn't dominate the scene.
20:41It's like walking a tightrope between openly sharing your emotions and maintaining a serene
20:47composure.
20:48Remember, while our emotions are a core part of our identity, overexpressing them might
20:54inadvertently diminish our perceived value in others' eyes.
20:58Seneco, a Stoic philosopher, once wisely said,
21:02The best way to deal with anger is to wait.
21:05This profound statement lies at the heart of our ninth rule.
21:09It's a call for patience for a moment of pause before we let our emotions lead the way.
21:15It's about cultivating a sense of control over our immediate reactions, especially in
21:21heated moments.
21:22By doing so, we not only preserve our dignity, but also allow for a more thoughtful and meaningful
21:29interaction with others.
21:31This rule, in its essence, is a reminder to all of us.
21:35In the ebb and flow of emotions, let's not forget the power of a calm and measured response.
21:42It's about finding that sweet spot where our emotions are present but not overpowering,
21:47where they contribute to but don't control the narrative of our lives.
21:52Be willing to walk away from a relationship that doesn't treat you well.
21:57In the realm of Stoicism, understanding and valuing one's self-worth is paramount.
22:03This rule delves into the essence of self-respect and the importance of setting boundaries in
22:08relationships.
22:09It's about recognizing that you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect in
22:15any relationship, whether it's romantic, familial, or professional.
22:20The Stoic approach teaches us to establish clear standards for how we wish to be treated
22:26and to adhere to them steadfastly.
22:29When these standards are consistently disregarded, it's a sign of disrespect and a clear indication
22:35that the relationship may not be beneficial to your well-being.
22:40In such instances, Stoicism encourages the courage to move forward, to step away from
22:45situations that diminish your value.
22:49This decision isn't rooted in malice or spite.
22:52Rather, it's an act of self-care and self-respect.
22:56It's a testament to the fact that you value yourself enough not to tolerate poor treatment.
23:01By being prepared to exit a relationship that fails to honor your worth, you convey a powerful
23:07message about the gravity of the situation.
23:11This can often serve as a wake-up call to the other party, highlighting the need for
23:16them to reassess their behavior if they wish to maintain a place in your life.
23:21The goal here isn't to cling to relationships that drain your happiness and confidence.
23:26Instead, it's about fostering healthy, respectful connections.
23:32Sometimes, this requires the fortitude to walk away when it's necessary for your personal
23:37growth and peace of mind, echoing the wisdom of Marcus Aurelius.
23:43You can control your mind, not outside events.
23:47Realize this and you will find strength.
23:50This profound insight reminds us that our power lies in controlling our internal state,
23:56our self-respect and mental fortitude, even when external relationships are challenging.
24:02In modern life where relationships can often become complex and emotionally taxing, this
24:07stoic principle serves as a guiding light, offering a path to inner strength and resilience.
24:14It encourages us to prioritize our mental and emotional well-being, ensuring that we
24:20engage in relationships that uplift and respect us, rather than those that diminish our sense
24:26of self.
24:27Select the most important tasks for each day.
24:30Imagine you're standing at the crossroads of a busy day, your mind bustling with a myriad
24:35of tasks, each vying for your attention.
24:39This scenario is all too familiar, isn't it?
24:42You've probably experienced the overwhelming feeling of staring at a never-ending to-do
24:47list, a list that only seems to grow longer with each passing day.
24:52It's like trying to climb a mountain that keeps adding a few feet to its peak every
24:57time you look up.
24:59But here's a transformative approach, a golden key to unlocking productivity and peace of
25:04mind.
25:05Each morning, as you prepare to dive into the day's demands, pause and ask yourself
25:10a crucial question.
25:12If I could only accomplish one task today, which would be the most vital?
25:17This task becomes your number one priority, your non-negotiable goal for the day.
25:23Mark it with a 1.
25:25Then, if time permits, what would be the next in line?
25:29That's your number 2, and so on.
25:31This method is not just about organizing tasks, it's about prioritizing your life.
25:38It echoes the wisdom of Stoic philosophers like Seneca, who famously said,
25:42It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it.
25:48By focusing on what truly matters each day, you're not just managing tasks, you're
25:54aligning your daily actions with your broader life goals.
25:58In conclusion, this rule is more than a productivity hack, it's a philosophy for life.
26:04It teaches you to focus on what's essential, to prioritize tasks that align with your core
26:10values and goals.
26:12By doing so, you not only become more productive, but also lead a more fulfilling life.
26:19Remember, it's not about doing more, it's about doing what matters.
26:24Harness the power of visualization.
26:27Before diving into this rule, remember that the previous 11 are foundational, but without
26:32this one, they might not fully come to light.
26:35Now you might be thinking, I've never done this before, or this seems a bit odd.
26:40But trust me, you're about to embark on a journey using a technique that's been home
26:45by top minds in behavioral studies for decades.
26:49Here's the key, don't overthink it, just dive in.
26:53You might try it for a day, a week, and feel like nothing's changing.
26:58But don't throw in the towel too soon, give it a solid two to three weeks, and the transformation
27:04will start to unfold.
27:06If you're still struggling, I'm here to guide you through it.
27:10Find a peaceful moment in your day, maybe early in the morning or right before bed,
27:15when the world is quiet.
27:17Sit down, relax, and let your mind wander to a future where you've achieved your goal.
27:23Imagine the details of this future life.
27:26What does your home look like?
27:27Who are your neighbors?
27:29Think about your daily routines, the places you'll go, the people you'll spend time with,
27:35and how you'll savor each moment.
27:37Consider how your loved ones fit into this picture.
27:40If someone were to ask them about you, what would they say?
27:44Visualize everything vividly, like a vibrant painting or a dynamic video clip.
27:49Focus on the colors, the sounds, the activities.
27:53Let your imagination soar and tune into your emotions, your breath, your sense of joy throughout
27:59this process.
28:01This isn't just daydreaming, it's a powerful tool for shaping your future.
28:06Remember, as the Stoics believe, the key to happiness is to let go of the idea that things
28:12could be different.
28:14Embrace this practice and watch as your goals and dreams start to align with your reality.
28:20Make yourself valuable and let others invest in you.
28:24Imagine yourself as a rare and precious gem, unique in your own right.
28:29Your presence in someone's life should be more than just existing.
28:33It should be a meaningful and deliberate contribution.
28:37It's a universal truth that easily obtained things are often undervalued.
28:43True appreciation emerges when effort and commitment are involved.
28:48As others invest their time, emotions, and energy in you, their bond with you deepens.
28:54You transform from a mere acquaintance to someone they deeply cherish.
28:59Your role is not to plead for affection or attention, rather it's to demonstrate that
29:04you add significant value to their lives, something that captivates their sincere interest.
29:10Encourage them to invest in you, making your presence an indispensable part of their existence,
29:16something they wouldn't dream of losing.
29:19Seneca wisely stated,
29:20To make a precious stone shine, you have to rub it, and to make a person better, they
29:26need to face difficulties.
29:29This illustrates that your value lies not merely in existing, but in being sought after
29:34and striving for self-improvement.
29:37Reflect on the relationship between Alexander the Great and his mentor, Aristotle.
29:42Aristotle was no ordinary teacher for the young prince.
29:46He was a beacon of knowledge and strategic thinking, crucial for governing an empire.
29:52Alexander, renowned for his ambition and intelligence, recognized the immense value of Aristotle's
29:58guidance.
29:59He dedicated considerable time and effort to his studies.
30:03Their bond transcended the typical student-teacher dynamic.
30:08It was a profound connection where the student viewed the teacher as an invaluable source
30:12of wisdom, akin to a treasure trove.
30:16Aristotle didn't simplify Alexander's path to knowledge.
30:20He presented it as a challenging quest for wisdom, thereby magnifying the significance
30:25of his teachings in shaping Alexander's remarkable legacy.